Close enough.
153 Comments
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Close enough.
October 30, 2014
Categories: bacon, Your mom likes this . . Author: Cyn, Widgets Fixerer
153 Comments
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March 3, 2021
Our government is a giant shitball of incompetents, liars and fascist pricks.
*sighs dreamily*
Best Poat Evah.
If you’ve ever gone inside the Apple Store, you can confirm that Apple has capitalized on the gay friendly environment. The employees are a hoot.
Never been inside one. Only gay guys go in those.
Is “Hoot” code?
This poat has gravitas.
It’s short for hootenanny.
One of my flannel dyke friends managed the local Apple store. She was making all of her numbers and had one of the highest performing stores. Replaced by hipster douche guy for not having the Apple “image”
She should write an open letter to the CEO.
Open letters are old and busted.
Lawsuits are the new hawtness.
Do both, cover da bases.
Flannel dykes are so Windows XP
I’m sending an open letter to your mom.
At that level it is “At will”. She looked into a lawsuit at the time.
I’m sending an open letter to your mom.
http://youtu.be/Z54-QHEZN6E
I’ve never been anything but an “at will” employee.
Regardless, I would enjoy watching Flannel vs Fabulous.
She had the same problem at Target. She couldn’t get her own store. She’d get signed off for STL, but never got a store. Target image is “High Energy”. AKA No fatties.
STL = Super Target Location ???
Slutty Twat Lover??
You rang?
Magic
So what’s going on? What have I missed?
It’s weird that you and Tim Cook came out on the same day.
You got an award for Muppetfucker of the Year; the committee hasn’t notified you of this surprise yet??
Oops.
Hahahahaha
Muppetfucker
Polygraph scheduled. Might actually happen this time.
What are you going to do if they ask you if you’ve ever had sex with a chicken?
Do you know anyone who’s had sex with a Muppet?
Oops, Target has TLs. Team Leader. MTL. Management Team Leader. STL. Store Team Leader. Dan’s BFF is a DTL.
leon’s polygraph:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KKzWTwJwrGc
When did you stop raping your muppet?
It’s not a lifestyle poly, so they likely won’t ask about my muppetfucking friends.
We’ll see if they manage to determine if I’m a transphobic homophobic racist misogynist christofascist monarchist who eats strangely and suffers occasional insomnia.
H2 financial advice:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=emvySA1-3t8
leon’s polygraph:
http://is.gd/zVZeNL
Trading Places is 30:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hCKnB6R6U_k
Still love this video:
Bill Whittle – Racism – Democrats and Republicans switch sides?
Looks like we may have a place for FiL. Nursing and Business office are reviewing his case today. Will get back with us and our case worker this PM. Fingers crossed.
Crossing fingers and hugs, Oso.
Trading Places is 30
Booooo.
I just realized the other day that I’ve been out of high school for 30 years. Shit.
But you’re only 29, Cyn…..
I got an award? Groovy.
Felt on felt sex is hot.
Ha!
I graduated when I was five. -ish.
That’s just friction, MJ.
*grabs the popcorn, a lawn chair, and a fire extinguisher*
How long would it take for a felt weenus to burst into flames, Leon?
Please explain in mathematical terms.
Given your minuteman propensities I think it would be merely an academic exercise.
So, when MJ says he felt up GND…?
2 more days, and you would have had November checked off, xbrad.
I’m sure some inspiration will come within the next 30 days or so.
I am utterly bored.
No golf today, MCPO?
Not today.
Xbrad, sing MCPO a song.
Given your minuteman propensities I think it would be merely an academic exercise.
————-
Correct. That’s the point.
I loathe the Grateful Dead.
Heh. Good to know, XB
Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer TV Special is 50 yrs old.
Correct. That’s the point.
I don’t do those anymore unless there’s money in it for me.
Boo!
The Great Pumpkin is on TV tonight.
As is football.
It’s like the universe has come together to make tv perfection.
Are you ready for some soccer?!!???
Mr. TiFW just got read into his new program yesterday.
He’s going out of town next Monday-Thursday.
Which means he will miss voting on Tuesday night. So he and I are going to vote early for the first time ever tonight. It feels kind of weird….
Erin is playing with a U18 team then with her team. Three hours out in the cold.
#wimpers
Baseball is over.
*has a sad
*knows he’s the only one
*has another sad
Soccer is a scam.
Why vote, TiFW? We’re gonna win anyway, why bother?
I’m sad baseball is over. It was an exciting season. Detroit had a good year, but sort of fizzled at the end.
I am glad at the outcome of last night’s game.
Cactus League schedule is out!!!!
I won’t be watching any sports any time soon.
All by myself….
I don’t know any of these parents. And the girls are huge. Erin is 14 and some of these girls are high school seniors.
I hope I brought enough layers .
She’ll probably by both games all the way through .
Lights are on !
No bathrooms. This is going to be a problem .
You should have brought a
crossfitZumba box and some weights.*regrets that large coffee for the drive
Holy guacamole – the high tomorrow is only expected to be 65, going down to 40 in the evening.
I can’t remember a Halloween night that cool in at least a decade.
Look into the woods!
Soccer game? No bathroom?
http://tinyurl.com/lwnrfoc
J’ames I already did Zumba and ran today. I’m tapped out.
Luckily I didn’t have taco bell
The other team doesn’t have enough players yet. They are either undisciplined or the first game is a waste.
Comment by Jay in Ames on October 30, 2014 5:18 pm
Why vote, TiFW? We’re gonna win anyway, why bother?
AYFKM?!?!?!?
If I don’t vote, I don’t get to complain for the next two years – my HS Civics teacher told us that way back in the Stone Age.
Besides, it’s kinda fun, getting out there and doing my civic duty – I just prefer to do it on the designated Tuesday so that I can meet the neighbors 🙂
Jordan on Barry Soetoro:
http://tinyurl.com/opeklms
Go back on Tuesday and vote again, Teresa.
The Feds are trying to indict Zimmerman on Civil Rights crap.
That’ll get out more of the shithead vote for sure!
Early voting has been a timesaver for us. The last time I voted on election day was in 2000. I was still in line when they called PA and FL for Gore. Lines totally died. It took 30 more minutes before I could “Waste” my vote for W.
I didn’t vote.
I voted already.
TJ – 51% of the vote in 2012… that’s a lot of shitheads. Hopefully and changefully they are lazy shitheads and stay home drunk and high….
I voted today. Poll Worker called me “Young Lady”. Compared to the Crypt Keepers manning the Polls, I’d have to say “Yep”
I’ve been seeing a lot of “Vote for Obama on Nov 4” ads and stickers. I laughed and laughed. Then I remembered that LIVs don’t know shit about Mid-Term elections.
saturd day i’m headed to an event with the repub candidates for gov and Lt gov for NYS… i really like the Lt gov candidate; good 2A guy, back water county sheriff… andy cuomo hates his guts so there is that….
they’ll probably lose by 20+ points
i hate new york politicians and the 666% that vote for them.
i feel like don quixote
Jam2, but can you sing “Impossible Dream”?
One of my flannel dyke friends managed the local Apple store. She was making all of her numbers and had one of the highest performing stores. Replaced by hipster douche guy for not having the Apple “image”
Sounds like some stories I read about Abercrombie and Fitch.
I voted today too. I’ve been early voting for years as a time saver. Tuesday used to be my designated OR day plus call day. I missed voting twice in off year elections and said Nevermore.
only drunk
Hey, if “being gay” is something you are born with, how is it any “braver” than being born left-handed? Or near-sighted?
It makes it sound like being gay is something that has to be overcome, rather than something that should be accepted.
The goal is to make homosexuality superior to heterosexuality. You already see it with radical feminists who claim that lesbianism is the only way to truly be a feminist.
COAlex, yes! A&F is notorious for that stuff.
Jam, I’ll sing it sober, but only without witnesses. I don’t sing in public. My choir teachers H8D me.
>>>I’ve been seeing a lot of “Vote for Obama on Nov 4″ ads and stickers. I laughed and laughed. Then I remembered that LIVs don’t know shit about Mid-Term elections.
It’s gonna be hilarious when the LIVes start claiming election fraud because Obama wasn’t on their ballot-
CoA – one of my wife’s cousins has a partner who was a militant lesbian… she is now undergoing addadicktome surgery….the whole mess is humorous; as in watching a train wreck humorous… OY!
i get a lot of sidelong glances, trepidatious looks and sundry hairy eyeballs at family gatherings….
one of the other “married into the family” guys calls her a transformer
^^^^^^
meh. My ^^^^ work for both comments.
http://tinyurl.com/lux9vla
http://tinyurl.com/lux9vla
Wow. That sure brought back memories……
I so enjoyed elementary school…..
“You’re not REALLY here for the hunting are you?”
Hahaha. Jam’s avatard is awesome.
I’m still waiting to find out why a Santa Fe deputy shot and killed another Santa Fe deputy in a hotel in Las Cruces.
oso – he probably found the dude on the downstroke with his wife
some ppl aren’t open minded about such cardio regimes.
wiser, the guy had a blood OH level over .3 … that’s incoherent, should be unconscious, puke and die drunk… i’m amazed he could even stand.
he’s hostage material
Did anybody notice that anybody else wasn’t terribly fond of their crucifix today?
The dogs used to only cower during Steeler games. Mild-Mannered Dan has become a crazy man during Fantasy Football. He’s playing against a good friend who is equally crazy about Fantasy Football. Mark may be worse.
John Anderson or Cher earworms? I’m kind of battling both.
http://tinyurl.com/qer8kk7
Too late. Sleepless in Seattle soundtrack.
O M G y’all!!! I always thought that Dino sang Everybody Loves Somebody Sometime. WRONG!!! It was a Frank Sinatra cover from the 40s. 50 years of fail. Kill me nao!
CoA – one of my wife’s cousins has a partner who was a militant lesbian… she is now undergoing addadicktome surgery….the whole mess is humorous; as in watching a train wreck humorous… OY!
i get a lot of sidelong glances, trepidatious looks and sundry hairy eyeballs at family gatherings….
Just grab the beer and popcorn and watch the fireworks. 😀
I been waiting all day for something something.
I’d love to give you a little sumpin’ sumpin.
If it has chocolate on the outside and peanut butter on the inside, give away.
Hang on… lemme hit the cupboard real quick.
Nobody something something.
Xbrad,
Did you see The ORENBERG, former SSBN, over at CDR Sals?
Pretty cool…
Yeppers, Chrispy. I shared that video at my place.
My sons would rather watch Tonto than football.
*sobs*
Where did I go wrong??!
Cyn, get them in a Fantasy Football league. They’ll be scaring Sparky in no time.
ChrisP and Oso are the same?
Decoder books are a scam.
we’re soul mates.
WSM
Si!
Jalapeño relish on jalapeño dogs. En fuego.
That calls for a Tums or five.
I work L8 tomorrow. I will survive. Gaynor’d/
TCFATOF totes
heh heh
Hahaha Totes!
Long day. Getting ready to read. G’night/
My biggest drinking problem is thinking I can match Dan drink for drink. He’s German AND Irish.
Hey Roamy!!! HHD Josh Turner. His voice way more than makes up for his girlie hips!!!
Oops. Started drinking too early. Singing show tunes. Broadway not Disney.
I always wanted to be Kathryn Grayson, Audrey Hepburn, or Natalie Wood. Get off my lawn.
Weren’t two of those ladies’ voices dubbed by Marni Nixon?
Yes.
Deborah Kerr, too. I didn’t want to look like her though.
I wanted to sing like Shirley Jones or Julie Andrews. Didn’t have the range. Debilitating shyness. I could sing in competition, but not in public. Choir teacher H8D me. Texas takes choir as seriously as band.
My competition songs were Greensleeves and Long, Long Ago.
My belle Evangeline. Look it up.
From The Princess and the Frog?
Well, I ain’t evil, I’m just good lookin’
Start a little derp and baby, start cookin’
I’m a hungry man but I don’t want pizza
I’ll blow down your house and then I’m gonna eat ya
Boobs
Wake the fuck up, bishes.