Big Boob TITS–A Story of Love, Redemption, and Liver Damage

Good morning repeat customers to the Fappening II, Oprah Poses with Stedman and Gail. I think you are all disgusting pigs for looking at boobs of really hot chicks because I’m a feminist and feminists defend the right for ugly chicks to pretend they are having sex. Which leads me to our second topic: what song did MJ write?

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I guess we could think about the weekend like this: rather than Dave falling into a body of water, The Almighty Hisself was going to recognize TITR by making the body of water fall onto Dave. Blog people, we are going to bear witness to a miracle in the desert…rain. To those of you that couldn’t make it…I wrote this song for you way back in 1975 with a bunch of hosers with really bad teeth, limited musical talent, and a scorching case of herpes.

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This is a hot chick with great big titties and a British accent. Her name is Libby Smith and I’m 99.99% sure that you’ve seen her before, either in your Fappening folder or in a former edition of BBF. Please put down your tweezers and weenus and give her a big ‘ol welcome!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Libby-Smith-2

Libby-Smith-5-e1388696821366

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Libby-Smith-17

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Libby-Smith-16Libby-Smith-23

224 Comments

  1. I win.

  2. Yes, yes you did.

  3. I wonder if I clear all the brush the dogs will go over and get rid of the problem for me?

  4. Niiiice

  5. IT’S HERE!!! TITS!!!11!!!!

  6. Much better. But I only think she’s prettier than last week’s debacle because I’m a dirty rayciss.

  7. http://i.imgur.com/DugOcB2.gif

  8. Ok, off to pay my phone bill so Dave can call me later.

  9. http://i.imgur.com/JhAwSeV.gif

  10. Thanks MJ and GND, much better this week.

  11. MJ did a bbf,
    That means “she” is prolly a dude, so i am not lookin.
    I have 20 min before I drop Zeke off at a friends, then off to de plane for TiTs

  12. If she’s a dude, I’m gay.

  13. What time do you get in, Vman?

  14. Today’s BBF lacks a certain gravitational pull. So disappointing.

  15. Not sure Cynnabuns I leave at 1:15 central, guessing 3pm at de hotel

  16. I’m in Snata Fe. I don’t know, the drive looks kind long. Maybe I should turn back…

  17. You’ve come too far, CA.

  18. Don’t they have a large ball of twine you can stop and look at, CoAlex? Just to recharge your curiosity.

  19. Jay, the biggest ball of twine is in Minnesota.

  20. Boarded the sardine can. Waiting for takeoff

  21. Maybe stop at the next gas station and ask for some twine. That should do it.

  22. May your journey’s be drama free, everyone!

  23. Journeys.

  24. *deducts 5 points from Hufflepuff for Jay’s apostrophe abuse*

  25. 8 hours away, that’s nothing.

  26. that was on purpo’se, leon, to give you something to do while everyone is gone

  27. and I should do more of it. I want the lowest score possible on hufflepuff.

  28. *adds 5 points to Hufflepuff as punishment*

  29. On my way out to pick up b-rad. Please pray that neither of us ends up burying the other out in the desert.

  30. In the cockpit, getting ready to spin the motors. Hello Phoenix!

  31. On my way out to pick up b-rad. Please pray that neither of us ends up burying the other out in the desert.

    If the car breaks down in the desert, you will have all the makings for a great Lifetime story.

  32. If the car breaks down in the desert, you will have all the makings for a great Lifetime story.

    Which one will be played by Valerie Bertinelli?

  33. I should prolly start packing.

  34. I’d rather play with Valerie Bertinelli than Sean.

  35. Sissy Spacek will play the role of Xbrad.

  36. And let’s be honest, there’s no way I’m going to put forward the effort to actually *bury* Sean in the desert.

  37. He’ll probably decomp/get eaten faster on the surface. Good call.

  38. Why am I picturing the scene in Thelma and Louise, right now?

  39. Because I look just like Brad Pitt?

  40. The one with Brad Pitt? It’s because you want to hug him, Jay.

  41. Brad Pits.

  42. I’m picturing more the cliff scene, not the Pitt scene.

  43. Brokeback Desert

  44. Love Among the Saguaro

  45. And my trek from paradise to perdition begins now.

  46. Joshua Tree Jollies.

  47. The Tumbleweed Infection

  48. Occupy about to get in taxi, wheeeeee!

    I wish everybody could be there. Muah!

  49. Well ,not actually IN the taxi.

  50. Twin Buttes

  51. That’s very nice of you LIppy, but I still hate you.

    all.

  52. Home for a little while, look out the back window and holy shit.

    I can’t tell if this frickin’ monster-thing eating lawn clover is a woodchuck or a nutria! I mean, DAMN.

    That is one fatass gotdamn rodent.

    And naturally, Scott is not here to give it the care it deserves.

  53. Mojave Mojo.

  54. Snoggin in Sonora

  55. Lauraw – it must be smart enough to know when it’s save.

    You’d better just move.

  56. safe

  57. Desert Dessert

  58. you need a little handgun practice, don’t you laura?

  59. man, I hate it when they put cheeseburgers together lopsided.

  60. Leaving for TITR in 20 mins.

  61. Et tu, MJ?

  62. I just picked up another truckload of crap to pack.

    We have never had this much work in front of us, and there is a big auction Monday.

  63. good thing you had to give up the business, and get obamajobs, huh?

  64. Oooops, forgot this /sarcasm

  65. As much as they work, the Ws should be rich.

  66. In the flying sardine can to TiTs

  67. The Obamajob helps when it’s slow.

    Right now it’s killing me.

  68. Kudos to the chick in your video, Leon. No hesitation, she just started fighting back.

  69. Loading up car, pit stopping at bank, headed to TITS!

  70. Sure, rub it in. Some of us get to go nowhere, just work and take care of kids. Where did I go wrong in life? Oh yeah, I think I remember.

  71. The guy did pretty well for being ambushed like he was.

  72. Where did I go wrong in life? Oh yeah, I think I remember.

    It’s a moment I cannot forget as long as I live. I know exactly when. And why. And it’s entirely my fault.

  73. Groundhog JUST sighted.

  74. Trapper Car in

    Do you have a coonskin cap? Will you be appearing on Mountain Men?

  75. When you guys get to the hotel, let us know. Mr. TiFW is watching “COPS” on the TeeVee as we speak. Kill me nao……

    Incidentally, a “block” of rooms doesn’t seem to mean the same thing to these folks as it does to me – our rooms are spread out all over the hotel, rather than all in a cluster.

  76. It’s only 94°. Where’s my jacket?

  77. Test

    Occupy shuttle pick up bench

    Phat Bastard left me in the lurch.

  78. At the hotel now. TITS shirt is on.

    Pants are off.

  79. He swiped the van without waiting for me and now I have to wait a half hour for the next one.

  80. Uh oh, drama time has begun.

    Will this be the high lesbian bartender moment of TITS?

  81. Sorry lippy, landed 20 min early and shuttle was there. He left about 15 min ago, so should be there by now.

  82. So, what is everyone doing this weekend?

  83. It’s either a possum (zombie?) or groundhog.

    Now let’s not jump to conclusions. I had a varmint hole next to my foundation that was exactly that size, and it turned out to be an armadillo.

  84. We ate all of our armadillos. They’re extinct.

  85. I’m in the courtyard by the fireplace – in case it gets chilly.

  86. Lippy and phat are at the hotel. HS says he’s in the courtyard – I’m in the air-conditioned lobby. Mr. TiFW is getting drinks at the Circle K, phat just got back from a beer run.

  87. Uhhh, did I miss something? Why are all of you people in the same hotel?

  88. Landed at PHX
    Muthafookin hot

  89. Okay then. Bye.

  90. You couldn’t have missed it.

  91. DFW.

    Soon

  92. Dead yet?

  93. Is there something going on?

  94. Somebody give Cyn a big squishy hug from me, please. She won’t mind.

  95. Wait…it was this weekend?

    Fack.

  96. Obamerjerb.

    Have a great weekend, folks! Miss the Hell out of all of you and I am eating my heart out! MWAH!

  97. I’m in Globe, AZ. Bing Maps LIES!

  98. Goodbye, cold, barren H2. I’ll see you later.

  99. I’m still giggling about Lippy saying “Phat bastard”

  100. I’m still here, dammit, and it’s like 93F. Practically Phoenix.

  101. TFG is such a tool.

  102. This model has the face of that highschool beeyotch that sued her parents.

  103. How is he this bad at getting his friggin’ picture taken? Isn’t that like his only skill?

  104. At least he isn’t mooning the camera.

  105. Good grief..most people close their eyes on ‘3’, when the photographer says, ‘on the count of three’.

  106. At least he isn’t mooning the camera.

    You sure about that?

  107. Narcissist in Chief needs to make everything about him. Especially photos with his “Peers”

  108. 576 gallons of propane @ $1.59/Gal + tax = Ouch!

  109. How long does that last you Chris?

  110. Landed in Phoenix.

  111. In the late 80’s Shell had a promotion where they would give you a free steak knife for a fill-up.

    I still have some.

  112. Laura, I administered the hug on your behalf. I told her that the inappropriate touching was from you too.

  113. Vmax, XBrad, and Sean are now here. #OccupyingHotelBar right now.

  114. Is CoAlex still in Globe?

  115. Jimbro,
    It should last until this time next year, barring a really BAD winter.
    We don’t do bad-ones that often here in the PNW…

  116. I think Car in was going through that in a month last winter.

  117. ChrisP, back that up!!! You’re jinxing the PNW.

  118. Cord of wood going to be delivered this week. We’ll load it in the garage for a total of 2 cords. Plastic film on the windows end of September-mid October. Heat goes on in mid October. The oil company loves me.

  119. I think that TITS should have a designated commenter so the rest of us don’t have to be sad and eat Bugles.

  120. Does Maine cordwood come with black widows, or is that a NM thing?

  121. Heh Oso.

    I’m eating beef stew hoping for some rain. It was a nasty 94 today with a heat index of suffocating. Will be 20 degrees cooler tonight.

  122. I’m here at the hotel. I want to shower and change before I head down to the bar.

  123. Yay CoAlex!!!

  124. No critters in the woodpile. If you leave it outside too long mice will make burrows. I store mine in the garage and put mouse poison in it preemptively. No black widows or scorpions in Maine. No rattlesnakes around here either.

  125. I need to pick up a pallet of pellets but I have nowhere to put them.

  126. Beasn, I don’t see how you do it. Humidity, heat, and tornado potential. Cray cray. We were in St Louis for a 4th of July. Dan has never experienced a “Real American” 4th of July. He didn’t want to go to Busch for day baseball. We had gone to a night game earlier in the week and nearly died. The crowds around the Arch were too much for him. We watched the fireworks on TV. (I’m the one that freaks in crowds. If Dan is freaking, you know SGR. We’ll never go to Mardi Gras or NYE in Times Square)

  127. Scott, we are already selling pallets of pellets. I love saying that on the radio. Very Danny Kaye.

  128. It looks like this over here http://is.gd/OMmiYo

  129. Garage is worse.

  130. Sky is dark and ominous.

    *keeps fingers crossed*

  131. You need a shed. Or a barn. Or a greenhouse.

  132. Did anybody get tired of anybody else’s attitude and tell them they could walk the rest of the way to Arizona today?

  133. We made it to a balmy 65 today with heavy cloud cover and steady light rain.

    I expect snow by the end of the month.

  134. Sean, oh no you din’t

  135. Friends get drunk at TITS
    Oso just sits, eats Bugles
    Makes witch hands at dogs

  136. Jew, you’ll have snow by the end of next week.

  137. Bugles are a scam.

  138. Buggles, on the other hand, are totally legit.

  139. Spider-dog at the HQ has weird eyes.

  140. I ordered me some books for my birfday and they came today. Woot!

    Not fun reads but they’ll learn me something.

  141. Yay!!! I still like your birfday ring

  142. XBrad: my mom and sister are very nice people.
    Tushar: you are the black sheep in the family, arent you?
    Sean: he is the inflatable sheep of the family

  143. Dolly reference. 100pts

  144. Thanks oso, I do too!

  145. HA, Tushar!

  146. Ugh. My hands smell like braunschweiger. Doggie crack.

  147. Heh. Doggie cracks smell like braunschweiger.

    Gross.

  148. Pheet on the ground in Phoenix

  149. Who is the designated commenter?

  150. Beasn, ha. MA doesn’t fall for meds in cream cheese. Gingy gets doggie crack by default.

  151. Has GND checked in yet?

  152. Dinesh D’Souza is speaking with SarahcOODA in PHX tonight. Tush is hugging Cyn for Lauraw…nah, can’t be. (Cues dramatic chipmunk)

  153. We should have put a helmet cam on Dave and live streamed this.

  154. Or at least a helmet.

    It is Dave, after all

  155. GoPro.

  156. Hanging out at The Bored Room because I H8 all y’all. Slams door. Runs from blog.

  157. This isn’t The Bored Room?

  158. Nah. TBR was created by Guy on FB. Mostly Hostages.

  159. Maddox got an ace-a-lanch, sweet.

  160. Scott, did you scout the clover for evidence against the nutria/woodchuck?

  161. No. Pissed that he is still alive. I was certain I got him last time.

  162. We went out for Indian and a thunderstorm made a huge mess in the yard. I went out with a branch saw in the rain to get a giant chunk of willow off the yard fence. Luckily nothing fell on the pasture fence.

  163. Have you tried a trap yet?

  164. I thought you did too. (Still giggling about Phat Bastard)

  165. No. There is no telling what I would catch in a trap that large. I would hate to trap a neighbors pet while I wasn’t around.

    Coyotes would thank me for that.

  166. This pellet gun is weird, it kicks twice, and if you hold it too tight you get bad results. I think adrenaline is killing it.

    I’ll use the 22 next time.

  167. Bait it with fruit, cats won’t bother. My barn cats never have.

    Might get a skunk, though.

  168. Car in needs to bookmark this.

  169. They’re ignoring you, Oso.

  170. Use the .22, Scoot. I’ve never had good luck with pellet guns.

  171. It’s ok. (Goes back to TBR)

  172. This pellet gun is amazing Pepe. It’s incredibly accurate and powerful, when I am relaxed.

  173. Anitas’ AR is one of those “Ban” rifles, so the muzzle-brake is fixed/pinned/whatever the fuck so it can’t be removed.

    If’n I ever feel flush enough, I’ll buy a replacement upper and get a legal suppressor.
    Of course then, I’ll have to buy a freezer to put the elk-parts in.

    In the mean-time, I need tires for the Lesbaru, before winter comes. Looks like I can get away with $238 at “Discount Tire”, as opposed to $335 at Costco.
    So it goes…

  174. Pepe,
    Scots’ pellet-gun is equal to a .22, but a little quieter…

  175. I shot a squirrel 3 times with a pellet gun (a really powerful one). It knocked him down and penetrated, but didn’t kill him cleanly. Bastard kept chirping at me until I got a .22 . Follow through is critical on pellet guns. The double recoil is from the piston. Pellet guns are actually harder on scopes than regular rifles.

  176. Did you try the online tire place?

    tirerack.com

  177. I have dropped rabbits with it.

    Fat Bastard is the white buffalo and I get jitters.

  178. A .22 rifle with CBs is almost as quiet as an air gun.

    Suppressed ARs are still pretty loud. if you want really quiet, you need something like a .300 Whisper/Blackout upper. Heavy .30 caliber bullet that’s subsonic.

  179. Rabbits die easy. Squirrels and giant rats are lots tougher.

    You’ve probably killed Fat Bastid, and new ones move in.

  180. He’s living dead.

  181. I shot a squirrel 3 times with a pellet gun (a really powerful one)

    http://tinyurl.com/lvjb7vz

  182. Scott,
    No, I did not, because like Costco, just buying the tires is not the end of it.
    If you go to “Costco.com, or “tirerack”, you get the price of the tires.

    The “fine-Print” at Costco informs you that there is an additional $14 fee for mount & balance and a $1 fee for disposal of your old tires.

    If you buy tires from the rack, you have to pay the same for the same.
    You show-up at a tire-place with tires (not purchased there) and ask for “mount & balance”, guess what you get…

  183. Pepe,
    Yes, 300 Blackout.
    That’s the upper I’m talking about…

  184. Make’s sense.

  185. No updates.

    TITS must suck.

  186. They are having a horrible time.

  187. Must be. They can’t be bothered to comment or post pics. It’s real early still in AZ. Mebbe there was a haboob. Yeah, that’s it…

  188. I’m agog at the nutrition guidelines in my textbook. They want me to advise people to eat bagels for breakfast and pretzels for snacks.

    I will play along.

  189. I called Dave when I got off work and he sounded miserable.

  190. Bagels? My diabetic nutritionist was the anti-bagel.

  191. Pretzels are an OK snack.

  192. Nutritionist was all about the english muffin. Whatev.

  193. Perhaps I should call wiser nice and wakey and make sure he doesn’t miss anything?

  194. Gingy just told us to go to bed. Dan is showing symptoms of my cold. Guess who is making chicken soup before he feels bad?

  195. beasn, it’s coming your way … already down into the very low 60’s here.

  196. Thanks clintbird. After the heat of the past several weeks, I’m ready for the change.

  197. Gingy is sassy.

  198. The TiFWs are the first ones to wimp out – we be tahred…..

  199. A dramatic end to a wonderful evening.
    A certain hostage drank too much alcohol, not enough water and fell down. In the middle of a busy intersection.
    To protect his privacy, I will not say who it was.
    Suffice it to say that he has skin of exotic hue.

  200. I get to meet so many new and old hostages phat, lips and manymoore

  201. So let’s get a party going (let’s get a party going)
    Now it’s time to party and we’ll party derp (party derp)
    Let’s get a party going (let’s get a party going)
    When it’s time to party we will always party derp

  202. Brown man kisses road
    Pavement retains heat not love
    No hugs for you Apu

  203. Should I start calling everyone to wakey wakey them?

  204. Abandonment is complete.

  205. I’m agog at the nutrition guidelines in my textbook. They want me to advise people to eat bagels for breakfast and pretzels for snacks.

    Brought to you by General Millstm.

  206. Carin, do you want that dehumidifier at some point today? I will have to get it from a guy in Canton. Maybe I could meet you somewhere in between for a handoff.

  207. My yard is a complete disaster area right now. Branches everywhere.

  208. No can do today. I work alllllll day today.

  209. Ok, I’ll go get it from him and you can let me know.

  210. :)

  211. Morning, children.

  212. I’m watching more gardening videos. Finally found a guy in Michigan.

    He has the awful pseudo-Canadian accent, though.

  213. I wonder if everyone killed each other at TITS.

  214. Takes a little longer than a day for liver failure to set in.

  215. Carin, did you have goji berry you were trying to get going? His took two years to blossom.

  216. Maybe they’re all of for a morning run? Or that crackfat class CO mentioned ?

  217. I have just a few berries this year. Not enough to brag, but enough to be hopeful . I bought a rather big plant I found nearby for cheap.

  218. Morning run = pancakes and mimosas.

  219. Right about now, Hotspur is probably asking to be left alone to eat his waffle.

  220. *Puts extra syrup on crack fat.

  221. gross

  222. gnu poat


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