BIG BOOB FRIDAY- Emergency Backup Edition

Hello and welcome to “XBrad gets tapped to fill in for the Indian guy at the IT call center edition of that august institution, BBF.”

Get it?


Shit. Well, I’ve still got three weeks left in the month.

I’ve got a crush on this girl.


So… Your mom and I were sexting talking, and this came up.

1876  Thomas Edison patents the mimeograph.

1942   U.S. Marines capture the Japanese airstrip on Guadalcanal.

1963   England’s "Great Train Robbery;" 2.6 million pounds ($7.3 million) is stolen

1978   Pioneer-Venus 2 launched to probe the atmosphere of Venus.


On to the bewbs.

Do you like Canada? I do. Well, I did when I was living in Washington, and could zip across the border to buy beer. Technically the age to buy beer was 19, but they never seemed to GAF.

Today’s model hails from Canada. She’s a 1977 model.  Her map coordinates there are 32FF-25-35, and she’s a petite 5’2”. Say hello to Miss Bianca Beauchamp.



Bianca workout


Bianca has been known to be quite NSFW and you can, if you dare, see more here.


This week’s Drink of the Week is bottom shelf vodka in a plastic 1.75L bottle.

I’d like to thank Tushar for coming up with a totally bullshit excuse to get out of searching the internet for hot women drafting BBF.

Enjoy your Friday. Try not to set Pupster on fire.


  1. You’re welcome.

  2. I was like 1 click away.

  3. Parts of her don’t look real.

  4. Thanks Carin.

    And thanks, XBrad!

    Greater love has no one than this: to lay down the crackpipe and wade into the thicket of boobs for one’s friends.

  5. Another girl in Michigan missing, abducted at this point. Another young girl, 14, went missing and they found her body in a park. Armada. This time it’s in Monroe. Not so close, but both more rural. i’m sure I’m not the only one thinking this.

  6. THe first girl was only killed 2 weeks ago? If that.

  7. Yeah, I’d be shocked if they were unconnected.

  8. I thought we were past latex now.

  9. We need to start arming our young girls.

  10. I wonder what Bianca looked like before the surgery. I bet she was adorable and a B or something reasonable.

  11. Training for vigilance, arming, and teaching avoidance of danger are all contribution to Rape Culture, Car in, so let’s not do that.

    Also let me know if you want help picking out a gun or telescoping baton for your daughter.

  12. Nose and lips have been altered, too.

  13. Also, the subtitle says men. It should be everyone.

  14. our rural kids don’t see danger. Perahps it’s the video game culture – everything is a game. Pretend. it doesn’t really happen.

    Growing up in Detroit, my head is always on a swivel. Always.

  15. Can you edit this so that the udders are below the fold?

  16. no

  17. I can.

  18. Done.

  19. xbrad doesn’t do the more tag. he’s not used to a lot of content.

  20. MMM is typically 1 above, the rest below.

  21. *scratches one drink off Carin’s tab at the MJ Meatup*

    *adds one to Leon’s*

  22. How does she keep from tipping over?

  23. Watch the gif, TiFW, she does a lot of core work.

  24. Decent-size caboose.

  25. Watch the gif, tif, make a new plan, stan, no need to be coy, roy.

  26. I want you picklesuckers to know, I actually had to *make* that gif.

    Oh, there’s plenty of gifs of her. Just none with her clothes on.

  27. Comment by Car in on August 8, 2014 9:09 am

    Parts of her don’t look real.

    Her toes have obviously had work done.

  28. Latex is a completely natural fiber.

  29. I’ll never understand the fascination with girls whose tits are larger than their heads.

  30. Me neither. Anything over a natural D is a waste, and those make me sad because I know what gravity will do.

  31. Her boobs are obviously overdone, but what really stands out as a crime is her lips.

  32. There’s a chick who was pissing me off on deviantArt for a while because she kept making the front page with shots of her very fake boobs. I felt a little sorry for her because she clearly had some body dysmorphia going on – she’d had 3 different surgeries on her boobs alone (they were even bigger than our model up there), and she was starting to mess with her face too the last I saw.

  33. Plastic surgery addictions are worse than tattoo addictions.

  34. Nice work pinch-hitting for teh bewbs, Xbrad. However, we do have a rule that trannies only appear on Mondays.


    Oh, and part silicone cyborg. But I digress.

  36. Hey, tattoo addictions are (hopefully) going to be making me money! I’m trying to put together a flash set right now.

    For the record though, I’m cool with tattoos, as long as you know that any you can’t cover up are going to severely limit your marketability as a worker.

  37. Plastic surgery bothers me because that can come with a whole bunch of health complications. Tattoos are pretty harmless, health-wise, unless you go to some seedy opium-den of a parlor that never washes their needles.

  38. The girls I work with like tatoos. The reason I cannot wear short sleeved shirts even in the HOT HOT summer is because one of the long-time employees has a sleeve on her arm. And we must all dress teh same.

    One girl was arguing that her DOCTOR had a sleeve.

    yea, ok, great. you become a doctor and you can get tats too.

  39. Scott has been verbally documenting to me the transition of some teenager at his job from ‘cute kid’ to ‘rivets, tattoos, and a steel bone through the nose.’

  40. I’ve toyed with the idea of getting a tattoo. Might try it one day, but it’s gonna be somewhere in the t-shirt/shorts area – nowhere I couldn’t cover up for an interview. The main deterrent for me is that I’m not sure how my BP would react to it – my going into shock is not an entirely remote possibility.

  41. I mostly agree, Revvy, I just don’t find tattoos attractive. No woman’s looks were ever improved by ink, and many marred. But it’s still less destructive than a surgery issue.

  42. Are you planning to sell art for tats, or doing the inking yourself?

    I don’t think you’ll go far inking without any ink.

  43. Wait until you’re thirty, Revvy. Think of what themes or images you were into ten years ago and imagine that you had been allowed to put a picture of it on your ass forever.

    After thirty, you’re more ‘you,’ and probably will have the same taste/ interests for a good long while.

  44. I guess that being an artist there is appeal to me of having an art piece with me all the time. I dunno if ‘attractive’ is the word I’d use to describe my feelings on tattoos aesthetically though. Especially when the wearer of said tattoos has *ahem* QUESTIONABLE taste. For example, I will judge the fuck out of a guy with a generic tribal tattoo. At least go Polynesian for fuck’s sake.

  45. With all these girls getting inked up, the lady that keeps her skin the way it came may well seem exotic someday.

  46. There is a girl at Zumba who is in great shape (because Zumba is such a great workout) and really pretty – yada yada yada- but the other day she was wearing a tank, and I saw for the first time that she has a HUGE TAT across her back. Butterflies and flowers.

    Yuck. And it just poked out at the sides, so you couldn’t even see the whole thing. how stupid did that look?

  47. Selling art for tats – I don’t have a steady enough hand to be an inker. But flash sheets go for about $10-15 a sheet, so one set sold to a few different shops (and there are a ton around here) can net me a few hundred dollars at least.

  48. I’ll probably be 30 before I can afford a tattoo anyway Laura ><

  49. Girl at my work got flowers on her feet. Big garish ones. She had lovely, healthy, fair skin. I don’t get it.

  50. With all these girls getting inked up, the lady that keeps her skin the way it came may well seem exotic someday.

    Already are, in the 25-35 age range.

  51. I have a friend who must be running out of room at this point. But then, she’s a tattoo artist, so it kind of goes with the territory.

  52. Get some ass antlers, Revvy.

  53. Thanks Xbrad – your input is always appreciated 😛

  54. Imagine coming face to face with some dude’s arm tattoo of a nude woman with her legs spread wide for all the world to see.

    At an elementary school.

  55. Like I said Teresa – my biggest problem with tattoos is that anyone can get them; and some people wouldn’t know taste if it smacked them in the back of the head and called them a cunt.

  56. Speaking of plastic surgery:

  57. Read a great insult the other day:

    I’d call you a cunt but you lack any semblance of warmth or depth.

  58. Merci Beauchamp! Ginger Boobs to lure unsuspecting souls into getting stolen

  59. Worst tattoo ever: Your mom.

  60. My new favorite insult came from Guardians of the Galaxy. Which by the way, you should all see. It’s the first time in a while that I saw a movie that was a) good and b)completely devoid of bullshit politics that distracted me from the rest of the movie.

  61. You know, I bet she’s not a real ginger, either.

    I’d bet like a dollar she isn’t.

  62. Big excitement at the beasn abode.

    Beasnette’s school called her with a job promotion of sorts. It pays tuition, on top of room and board, plus a small stipend.

    I’m excited as shit. She’s freaking out (had she gotten it when she first applied, she would have already been there for training) and the husband thinks it’s a bad idea (because of how stressed out she can get).

  63. Neither is the Paramore chick, but I don’t think she’s got any other modifications.

  64. I’m pretty sure Haley Williams has some ink somewhere.

  65. Again, ink before surgery. And I’ll I’ve ever said is that tattoos never make women prettier. I’m open to the possibility that hers might be neutral.

  66. Not crazy about ink. Military guys look okay with it, but other than that…pffft.

    Though my daughter’s friend has a primitive Simba on her shoulder that looks cute.

    The only tattoo I would get would be on my foot.

  67. Wow. Licorice Dick sent an F-18 to drop one load of 500 lb. iron bombs on ISIS. He’s a regular George Patton. But with metrosexual flair.

    Who knows. Maybe one actually fell on something important, like a goat or 72 raisins.

  68. You know who could benefit from some serious tat ink? Nancy Pelosi. Face ink in particular.

  69. Latex is a completely natural fiber.

    Even when it’s worn by a Real Doll?

  70. How does she keep from tipping over?

    It’s fine when she goes horizontal.

  71. He’s a regular George Patton. But with metrosexual flair.

    Hey, Chocolate Jesus, the Nobel Committee called. They want their worthless coin back.

  72. Hey, Chocolate Jesus, the Nobel Committee called. They want their worthless coin back.

    That’s okay, it wasn’t really gold. Just a gold wrapper over Hershey’s.

  73. What’s the difference between Barack Obama and William Tecumseh Sherman?

  74. Sherman never thought a march was the same thing as Prancercizing.

  75. Sherman’s wife didn’t have a penis?

  76. Sherman never considered golf clubs military assets.

  77. Sherman didn’t give away free shit?

  78. Sherman probably knew how to handle a firearm without squealing.

  79. Sherman didn’t think victory was a dirty word.

  80. Sherman loved his country.

  81. Sherman did not know how to hang curtains.

  82. You cannot qualify war in harsher terms than I will. War is cruelty, and you cannot refine it; and those who brought war into our country deserve all the curses and maledictions a people can pour out. I know I had no hand in making this war, and I know I will make more sacrifices to-day than any of you to secure peace.

    W T Sherman

    Can’t I just finish my waffle?

    B Hussein Obama

  83. Sherman could throw a ball and not look like a fucking girl?

  84. Sherman could grow a beard.

  85. Obama is married to one.

  86. Sherman fought to unite his country.

  87. Sherman didn’t have a “bodyguard”.

  88. Actually, girls look better throwing a ball than Obama.

  89. Pretty sure Licorice Dick enjoys handling balls.

  90. Even when it’s worn by a Real Doll?

    My mind: blown.

  91. “Actually, girls look better throwing a ball than Obama.”

    Thanks J’Ames, I was about to be offended.

  92. Sherman had a battle tank named after him.
    0 married a septic tank who took on his name.

  93. Pulling the slide back on this new pistol is pretty hard for my little girl hands.

  94. Sherman didn’t wear a helmet while riding a girl’s bicycle.

  95. Pulling the slide back on this new pistol is pretty hard for my little girl hands.

    Just do what I do – stand behind your man.

  96. ZOMG, Tushar wins the thread!!!!

  97. Laura I bought HotBride a really nice Browning BDA 380 at her request, and she can’t rack the slide either. 😦

  98. Laura, if you are going to visit the range often, get a magazine feeder. It will save your fingers from getting sore.

  99. Sherman didn’t wear a helmet while riding a girl’s bicycle.

    Sherman never had trouble going through a gate while holding an umbrella.

    Also, I don’t think Sherman ever said “The South acted stupidly.”

  100. Laura, this is one example:

    There are many that are cheaper and more expensive than this

  101. I can do it, Hotspur, it just takes a little technique. Guy at the store said it would get easier over time.

    Wow, I had no idea NRA membership was so reasonable. It’s a requirement for membership in this little range down the street. I think I might just spring.

    Need to practice.

  102. Pulling the slide back on this new pistol is pretty hard for my little girl hands.

    You know what would help? Crossfat Zumba.

  103. Yeah, new springs are often very tight. Put a hundred rounds through it for practice and it will be much easier.

  104. Seriously, the parasitic worm in the White House is supposed to be the greatest orator of all time. Go ahead and read some of what Sherman wrote. Look at his use of the English language. Then compare that with just about anything Licorice Dick has said in any of his speeches. It’s like comparing the eloquence of Shakespeare with the squeals of a barnyard.

  105. Ermagerd, cresfert again! Is there no surcease?

  106. I hope that Kerry’s pink bicycle is armored. I didn’t know the Secret Service had such vehicles.

  107. Zumba, george. I’m all about Zumba now.

  108. I always knew crossfat was a gateway drug.

  109. Edsel Ford’s elementary school letters to Henry are better written than any thought 0bama could articulate without help.

  110. i hate to switch. Wiser’s mocking was too much. I’m all about Zumba now.

  111. hate- had

  112. Ermagerd again. These guys look like every other art director in every ad agency I know.

  113. Cultural Marxism has accomplished just about every change to our language that Newspeak had intended when I wrote “1984.”

  114. 11! OMG I love Zumba!!!!

    Oh, no wait… that was Zima.

  115. Cyn, just think how hawt you’d look in one of these:

  116. I had a Zima in Globe, AZ when it first came out. Haven’t had one since.

  117. Zumba?

  118. Wiser’s mocking was too much.


  119. Wiser’s mocking was too much

    It’s only because he secretly likes you.

  120. Laura, lots of women have trouble racking a pistol slide.

    Try a different technique. Instead of grabbing the back of the slide with your left thumb along the right side of the slide, reach your left hand over the top of the slide, with your left thumb along the left side of the slide. That gives you more of your thumb along the slide, and all four fingers gain purchase along the right side of the slide. And rather than actually pulling the slide toward you, you can push the receiver forward, or a combination of push/pull. Just be careful to keep the weapon pointed downrange.

  121. Or at a liberal.

  122. I’m sad that my mockery wasn’t enough.

    Also I work with a woman who teaches Zumba. It worked for her.


  123. Althouse was one of the busy ditches who is directly responsible for putting Licorice Dick into the White House. Twice. Nevertheless:

    Doing nothing is not an option, but we also cannot do too much. Obama is trapped on his own mountain, but what he owes us — we who have put him on the mountain — is to do what is right, without taking any account of the fall elections, but you can see in his face and hear in his voice that he won’t do that.

    “… targeted airstrikes, if necessary…. humanitarian airdrops of food and water… consulting with other countries — and the United Nations — who have called for action….”

    That’s not much, and it must cheer the enemy in Iraq. Instead of explaining why he wouldn’t do more, he spoke next to Americans he pictured thinking even this is too much:

    “I know that many of you are rightly concerned about any American military action in Iraq, even limited strikes like these. I understand that. I ran for this office in part to end our war in Iraq and welcome our troops home, and that’s what we’ve done. As Commander-in-Chief, I will not allow the United States to be dragged into fighting another war in Iraq.”

    He’s your mess, lady. You voted for this.

  124. Here, Laura. A good demo.

    Snapcaps are nice, but not critical. But without them, when you rack the slide, it will lock open (on most semi pistols). |

    Practice makes perfect. And of course, don’t practice at home with live ammo. And always follow the three rules.

  125. Thank you Leon for making me snort coffee through my sinuses.

  126. And always follow the three rules.

    Like, go make me a sammich.

  127. Welcome. That’s the same guy who did the “No, you do not in fact love science” page.

  128. Work seems to have slowed for the moment. I think I might go make a gigantic spinach salad.

  129. Like, super huge.

  130. Bigger than Bianca’s bazongas huge.

  131. Another thing that will make me snort coffee out of my sinuses: Leon bellydancing.

  132. Can’t. No belly.

  133. Can’t. No belly.

    Borrow Rosetta’s.

  134. There’s no need to fear. UnderDog is here!

  135. Hey, Chief, are you coming out to TITS to make out with Rosetta?

  136. Hotspur – I wish! No can do. But, I’ll be in Canton, MI the last week of September – 1st week of October.

  137. Well, hit me up with an email and we’ll hoist a few.

  138. Ohmahgowd, thanks Leon, for making me spend all afternoon watching Maddox youtube videos.

  139. Can you at least send Herself?

  140. I’m on Mackinaw Island Sept 24th through 26th, but otherwise around Ann Arbor.

  141. Probably just as well. Rosetta is probably HIV + by now, if not full blown AIDS.

  142. Hotspur – Ypsi is about halfway. I hear they have a BUNCH of ghetto bars!

  143. I only go to the college bars. Better looking waitstaff/patrons.

  144. And even then, only in Ypsi. Less snooty.

  145. Ypsi works for me. Side Track Tap is a nice joint. Great burgers.

  146. Leon – Sidetracks is always a good spot.

  147. I’ve been there more than a few times. We usually do Happy Hours across the street at Aubree’s just because the seating is easier. In the summertime they have an open balcony upstairs that’s pretty nice.

  148. Hotspur – If Leon still has a job then, he buys the first round! 😉

  149. I’ll still have a job. I may not be working on this project, but I’ll still have a job.

  150. That works. Carin can get the second.

  151. Or we could carpool up to where she works in case she’s doing a fake double that day.

  152. On that note, I’ll state for the record that the Kraken Black rum is pretty nice.

  153. She’ll be working somewhere else by then.

    As a Zumba instructor.

  154. I only mention the rum because my weekend has officially started.

  155. I want to go out to the new Knight’s for a steak, but I think HotBride will be too tired after a long day of herding cats at the co-op.

  156. Would you want this fudge packer teaching your kids?

  157. Read that. Even if fake, it’s great.

  158. The United States launched another round of airstrikes…

    Earlier Friday, two 500 pound bombs were dropped by two Navy F-18 fighter jets near Erbil

    Wow. Two whole bombs. Don’t mess with Licorice Dick.

    An eight year old running with pinking shears is more dangerous than this cockholster.

  159. I figured it was fake (didn’t check) but I love the concept.

    “I want fucking pie.”

    “Shut it you little criminal in training.”

  160. Well, George, he ain’t done yet. When he gets back from his vacation he’ll give a speech, and really tell them who’s boss.

  161. Moochelle?

  162. Because nothing says “I won’t tolerate genocide” like another vacation at Martha’s Vineyard on the taxpayers’ dime.

  163. In an honest world, the humanoid sack of poodle shit in the Oval Office would be held in the same esteem as Vidkun Quisling.

  164. GO, he will be. I have no doubt. Whatever remains of us in 30 years will use his name as a derisive epithet.

  165. 2014: “You really shit the bed on that move.”

    2044: “You really Obamaed on that move.”

  166. LD would do a better job harassing ISIS if he dropped thousands of copies of Penthouse over Mosul.

  167. 2014: “This is the SNAFU of all fucking time.”
    2044: “This is the OBAMA of all fucking time.”

  168. Obama: the only man who could restore dignity to the name of Benedict Arnold.

  169. By comparison, Arnold was a patriot.

  170. The U.S. has confirmed that the Islamic State group has kidnapped and imprisoned Yazidi women so that they can be sold or married off to extremist fighters, said a U.S. official who spoke on condition of anonymity because the information came from classified intelligence reports. There was no solid estimate of the number of women victimized, the official said.

    Paging Sandra Fluke, the war on women started without you.

  171. On Tuesday, Yazidi lawmaker Vian Dakheel made an emotional plea in parliament to the Iraqi government to save the Yazidi people, saying the “women have been sold in a slavery market.”

    But the real enemy is Hobby Lobby.

    Bizarro world.

  172. This edition of BBF is probably the least surprising evah, considering the Prez of the Bianca Latex Lovers Fan Club posted it 😀

  173. GO, public school teachers are 100 times more likely to molest a child than a pastor or priest.

    But the Little Sisters of the Poor and Priests For Life are public enemies.

  174. There’s nothing wrong with xbrad that a pair of synthetic chest muffins in a wet-look vinyl halter top wouldn’t cure.

  175. Quit peeking through my window, George.

  176. public school teachers are 100 times more likely to molest a child than a pastor or priest.

    It was a public school teacher here in LA who was eventually caught serving children cookies doused with his man-juice. But it’s the church that’s the real problem, of course.

  177. Licorice Dick opines on Al-Qaeda:

    “The analogy we use around here sometimes, and I think is accurate, is if a JV team puts on Lakers uniforms that doesn’t make them Kobe Bryant. I think there is a distinction between the capacity and reach of a bin Laden and a network that is actively planning major terrorist plots against the homeland versus jihadists who are engaged in various local power struggles and disputes, often sectarian.”

    Looks like the JV team in Iraq just fucked up your brackets, noodle dick.

  178. Licorice Dick opines on Al-Qaeda…

    Jesus; we are sooo fucked.


  180. If one could crack open the eggshell-thin cranium of the mammal behind the Resolute desk, what would one find? Everything in his smooth cerebrum seems to revolve around sports teams, celebrities, junk food… Has there ever been such a shallow, vapid mind in the White House? The guy who has the keys to the nukes finds more depth in the musings of Beyoncé and Shaquille O’Neal than in an army of advisors or the patrimony of a once-free republic. We have a president living on the same intellectual level as Tiger Beat.

  181. Cyn, that’s just circular reasoning.

  182. Bianca seems nice. I bet she’s a swell actress.

  183. I bet she’s a swell actress

    Somehow, there is swelling involved.

  184. Preezy Teenie Peenie has it under control. He’s a multitasking fucking genius.

  185. Everything in his smooth cerebrum seems to revolve around sports teams, celebrities, junk food…


  186. Figures XBrad would pick a redhead.

    I got an attagirl today. Figures that the project I worked on for a total of 3 hours is gushingly grateful, while the project with blood, sweat, and tears for months is “meh, what have you done for me lately.”


    Seems to work pretty well.

  188. Greetings, kickers of shit.

  189. All we have here is sand. There’s no shit to kick.

  190. Dig a little. Sox probably left something for you.

  191. Dig a little. Sox probably left something for you.

    Unfortunately it does not contain silicone.

  192. Evening Hostages.

    Most excellent work xbrad.

  193. I realized who Haley reminds me of:

    Skip to 2:27, Dodger Leigh, plays “Wii”.

  194. By the way, this…

    This week’s Drink of the Week is bottom shelf vodka in a plastic 1.75L bottle.

    …takes me back.

    When I tell people my drink of choice was cheap-ass rotgut vodka, they’ll often say “Like Popov?” To which I reply, “No, Popov is a brand name.”

  195. When I tell people my drink of choice was cheap-ass rotgut vodka, they’ll often say “Like Popov?” To which I reply, “No, Popov is a brand name.”

    Plastic bottle. You get change back from $5.

  196. Buying alcohol in a plastic bottle is a hormonal and cultural disaster.

  197. Also, a bitching good time.

  198. You drop a plastic bottle, it don’t break.


  199. Feminizing xenoestrogrens are alcohol-soluble.

  200. Better stated: plastic bottles give you manboobs.

  201. Better stated: plastic bottles give you manboobs.

    Whatever makes you feel better about yourself.

  202. Getting too drunk to be inclined/able to leave the house also gives you manboobs.

  203. Look man, I’m just trying the return fire in the #waronmen. Too much of your world is trying to drop your T levels and make you into Alan Alda, I’m just letting you know.

  204. Don’t get him started on those damn phytoestrogens


  205. Its true!

  206. #everythingwillkillyou

  207. Not everything. And some things will make you a little bitch before you die.

  208. Yes, I’m seeing that.

  209. #weareallgoingtodieanywaymightaswellenjoylifeevenalittlebiteverynowandagain

  210. #alsotalkinginhashtagsisgayandidenouncemyselfforparticipating

  211. Nothing about vodka in a plastic bottle is worth enjoying, Cyn.

  212. #repeatedlydenouncesCyn

    Sounds dirty.

  213. You know what else can turn you into a little bitch before you die? Big, muscular transsexuals. Roid rage + hormone replacement + gender confusion = hormonal and cultural disaster.

  214. I’m sure you’re correct, Sean. That’s why I don’t go near such things.

  215. *cough*

  216. Damn. The hair cut lady said my hair isn’t long enough to donate yet. I want it gone.

  217. I’m sure you’re correct, Sean. That’s why I don’t go near such things.

    So…telephoto, then?

  218. No way, trannies are gross.

  219. How long, Jew?

  220. Probably another month. It has to be 12 inches.

  221. It has to be 12 inches.

    I believe that that, as the young people say, is what she said.

  222. Where is the measure-starting point? Like a pony at the base of the neck, or top of head at the crown? Inquiring minds!!

  223. I thought you measured from the taint.

  224. I love the banter here. It’s like the Algonquin Round Table but with jenkem instead of martinis.

  225. *offers Cyn the crown*

  226. From the crown. Not from the nutsack.

  227. From crown to nutsack – isn’t there an old English name for this length of measure?

  228. I find your comments intriguing and wish to subscribe to your hashtag.

  229. *Subscribes MCPO to #fromcrowntonutsack

    You can thank me later.

  230. Ye Olde Furrelong

  231. Gun safe acquired, hidden and installed.

    3 hours total.

    Beer me.

  232. Ye Olde UnfurledOMGlong

  233. *hands over beer-can-crown to Scott*

  234. *throws beer at scott*

  235. How big a safe, scott?

  236. Pistol safe, so not very big. It’s big enough for what we have and maybe one or two more.

    It’s easy to hide and has keyless entry. I’m very pleased with it.

  237. When Laura gets home I will challenge her to find it.

    She will fail.

  238. Very cool.

    I’m in the tough position of needing a good sized standup safe (especially since I know my grandfather has quite a few shotguns and rifles that will eventually be mine), but I have absolutely nowhere to put it.

    They’re also fairly pricey.

  239. Holy crap. Local gun place sells if for 25% less than Amazon.

    They kick ass.

  240. Did you bury it in the rhubarb patch?

  241. You own a business don’t you? Lock the long guns in a cheap cabinet at work.

    A good pistol vault for the home is $200 or less.

  242. Rhubarb. Does anyone know what that really is?

    It could be pig eyelid.

  243. Publicly announcing that you’re going to cause your wife to fail by/and challenging her to go find a firearm probably isn’t a good idea.

  244. No basements in Yulee. Trust me, I know things.

  245. You own a business don’t you? Lock the long guns in a cheap cabinet at work.

    Any cabinet of appropriate size would be easily accessed by employees. Plus, I prefer to be able to put my hands on whatever I have.

    Yes, I know there’s no reason I’ll ever need to instantly put my hands on 3 or 4 different model .22 rifles. *shrug* Just a thing for me.

  246. No basements in Yulee. Trust me, I know things.

    Basements at sea level are usually a bad idea.

  247. With enough sump pumps, you can have a basement anywhere. After all, Dr. No had a basement.

  248. I’ve seen decent under-bed safes for long guns. Is that an option?

  249. Oh believe me, I know. Baptist hospital? Which sits directly on the bank of the St. Johns River? Massive basement. It was very entertaining watching them try to pour footers for a new elevator when the fucking river was pouring into the hole.

    “I don’t think those pumps are gonna do it fellas.”

  250. I’ve seen decent under-bed safes for long guns. Is that an option?

    Huh. Haven’t seen that. Sounds interesting.

  251. Did anybody notice that the hair on the back of their neck stood up whenever anybody else entered the room today?

  252. Gun Bed

  253. uh-oh
    there is a cop in my parking lot searching cars.
    then the medical examiner showed up.
    that means someone is dead right?

  254. “challenging her to go find a firearm probably isn’t a good idea.”

    This is public? Oh, and the word I used was safe.

    It’s empty.

  255. Pretty neat MCPO. But when I say I’ll end up with all of Grandpa’s guns, we’re talking a half dozen revolvers and probably 15 long guns.

  256. Speaking of gun safes, I spoke with someone today who while on vacation had their home broken into. The gun safe was trashed, but intact. He said it cost as much as the safe to hire someone to open it.

    Because it was bolted to the floor he still has his stuff. I know of several people with safes that were not bolted down that no longer have safes, nor what was inside them. The crooks take the safes to open in the privacy of somewhere else.

  257. Cinder blocks, concrete and a steel door might be a cheaper way to go.

  258. uh-oh
    there is a cop in my parking lot searching cars.
    then the medical examiner showed up.
    that means someone is dead right?

    Not necessarily, Vman. Perhaps the medical examiner owes the cop some money. Or they’re fucking.

  259. You should ask them if they have pot for sale.

  260. Or they’re fucking.
    Sean remind me to kick you in the poon at TiTS

  261. Panic room!

  262. Maybe the ME is examining new lifeforms on the car?

  263. In Houston, that’s called “Friday night”, VMan…..

  264. Pupster?

  265. has anyone read any of John Ringo’s Black Tide series?
    I like Zombie Apocalypse books as well as the next guy, but there sure are lots of them.

  266. Did you guys see this flashback out on the internets?

    My car is so old, I still have one.

  267. Heh. I have a Case Logic somewhere. I still use my car’s CD player, but only rarely.

  268. I even have a cassette deck with my CD player.

    Muy suave

  269. My car is so old, the wiring to the stereo is fubar’d, and I had to pull the fuse on that circuit, or it would keep draining the battery. So not even a CD player.

  270. I have 3 CDs in the car. I don’t remember the last time I took the Mortal Kombat: Annihilation soundtrack out of the player.

  271. Music was hip 20 years ago.

    Today it’s crap.

  272. My CD player holds six:
    1. Alice in Chains, Facelift
    2. Alice in Chains, Black Gives Way to Blue
    3. DeadMouse5 mix ‘tape’
    4. Foster The People, Torches + other stuff
    5. Mötley Crüe, Girls Girls Girls
    6. ???

  273. Speaking of old music, “Detroit Rock City” came on the radio as Googleman and I were waiting in line to pick up the Axeman after school… Googleman sang along with me. *sniffs*

  274. Work tonight totally fukkin Obama’d.

  275. Autotune killed music. I blame Cher.

  276. Why are your kids in school in the first week of August. WTF?

  277. Wait. I blame Mer.

  278. in my cd player in the car

    A religious disk
    mark steyn book on tape
    i think that’s it

  279. They started last Wednesday; we have quite a few school districts that operate on this “modified” almost year-round school calendar. Get week long breaks in October and March, plus the last two weeks of December. It’s okay.

  280. Here’s a thought. China is investing heavily in Africa. Mostly in east Africa, but they’re working hard to build their influence in western Africa as well.

    I think there’s a much better chance of an Ebola outbreak in China than in the US.

    BTW, I think a huge part of the very high morbidity of Ebola is simply the atrocious levels of nursing care in Africa.

  281. OK, Cyn. That makes some sense. Probably actually makes it easier for a lot of families to schedule vacations and shit too.

  282. ola is simply the atrocious levels of nursing care in Africa.

    plus problems with the population. They are distrustful of doctors, etc … it is one of the WORST places for such a virus, but that’s where it’s from.

  283. ebola

    Also the part where you poop out your insides. I’m pretty sure that has some affect on mortality rates.

    If China had an ebola outbreak, they would use napalm for a cure.

  284. Car in, my comment was going to be along the lines of “Africa is and will indefinitely remain utterly fucked.”

  285. I didn’t watch the movie that was “based on” the book (i.e.: has the same title, and that’s apparently about it) but in the novel, World War Z starts with an outbreak in China. Rural China.

  286. Yeah, that’s part of my point. Rural China still as a lot of the same dysfunctions as Africa when it comes to stuff like infectious diseases.

  287. OK, Cyn. That makes some sense. Probably actually makes it easier for a lot of families to schedule vacations and shit too.

    I would think it would make it more annoying. If you have a three month window to take a two week vacation, then you have some flexibility. If you have a week off then everyone is trying to take vacation at the same time.

    Plus, if you have kids in different schools, you run into the problem of different weeks off for elementary vs. middle vs. high school.

  288. Whenever people start to panic about how China is going to be the big new hyperpower, I am comforted by the fact that they have a massive underclass of dirt-poor peasants whom they don’t even allow to migrate freely within the boundaries of their own country. I’m no economist (hell, I’m not even Thomas Friedman), but I don’t think that’s necessarily more of an asset than a liability.

  289. Crap, between MICHAEL SAM MICHAEL SAM 24/7 and Johnny Football, I’m ready to shoot my TV.

  290. i got to see the presentation rifle given to the procurement officer for this contract.
    the stock is a tiger striped walnut…
    kinda cool

  291. I’ve fired one, Jam. Nice action.

  292. “I don’t think that’s necessarily more of an asset than a liability.”

    could be just a poor country’s kinetic asset –

    dropped from aeroplanes, the mass effect might be overwhelming

  293. rifles and falling bodies kilted it –

    9.8 m/sec-squared yo

  294. Metric? What the fucking fuck, Jam? This isn’t some Euroweenie fucking blog!

    32fps squared!

  295. just checking –

  296. Though I have no idea what the terminal velocity of a rural western Chinaman is.


  298. ha!

  299. 54 m/s + or minus

  300. and one last thing –


  302. Actually, terminal velocity is 0.

  303. We were out on a date in my Daddy’s car
    We hadn’t driven very far
    There in the road, straight ahead
    The car was stalled, the engine was dead
    I couldn’t stop, so I swerved to the right
    Never forget the sound that night
    The cryin’ tires, the bustin’ glass
    The painful derp that I heard last

  304. Morning, children.

  305. L to R

    Tushar, Pupster, Xbrad

    Thanks for doing boobs Xbrad, Tushar, you can try again in September if you like.

  306. wakey wakey

  307. Morning cArIN.. You need any help finding your boobs?


  309. Pupster, that is very kind of you but I think I can handle it.

  310. Kay.

  311. I am smoking two turkeys today.

    A double.

  312. Ha ha, someone posted this:

    And then someone else posted this:

  313. New poat!

  314. So, last night I got stiffed on a $108 tab. Kids, who ate like kings. Crab. Porterhouse. Zero tip.

    The hostesses knew them from school- they went to school with my kids.

    And you guys thought Facebook was useless.

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