You know you want it

L to R: H2, IB


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  1. He’s winking at me and it’s still Wednesday here.

    Seems rather naughty.

  2. Best post ever!

  3. Hi Rich!!

    *checks calendar; is confused*

  4. Happy Birthday… for three more hours

  5. This comment is a placeholder comment. If the commenter has anything to post, it may be placed here.

  6. Today was fun; we haven’t had a thread like that in a long while. This is why I love “you people”.

    I think I”ve done enough damage for one day with two poats, plus my leg is still being a bugger.

    G’night peeps and peepers.


  8. If that’s H2 in the photo at the top, I might take up the breast stroke.


    You’re not truly in touch with your feminine side.

  10. L to R: H2, IB

    Only if the one on the left is a tucker.

  11. If I had a feminine side, I’d probably touch it a lot.

  12. If I had a feminine side, I’d probably touch it a lot.

    Nowadays, I believe that could be considered a marriage for tax purposes.

  13. Sounds like the IDF is censoring news from near the Gaza Strip. That’s usually a sign they’re about to roll into town.

  14. Just another reason for Licorice Dick to whine about the mean Israelis. Hope Netanyahu continues to hold him in contempt.

  15. OK, looks like IDF responded to an attempt by 13 Hamas terrorists to use a tunnel to infiltrate Israel. Looks like 8 killed and the other 5 fled back to Gaza.

  16. At break of day when that man drove away, I was waiting
    I cross the street to her house and she opened the door
    She stood there laughing
    I felt the derp in my hand and she laughed no more

  17. Insomnia.

  18. Eviction Watch: day 3

  19. 66. The lake is frozen.

  20. Overnight low of 51 here.

    *watches mammoth stroll through back yard*

    Well that’s ominous.

  21. 66? I sure hope MJ has his winter coat. I know leon does.

  22. MJ is so unfamiliar with cold that he thinks 66 is cold.

    I fear for him in the age to come, for surely shall he perish. Or at least shiver a lot and bitch about the cold.

  23. I have a strong feeling that I’ll be living where it snows in the next year or so.

  24. Are you moving or is the snow coming to you?

  25. MJ is moving to Athol?

  26. Next year there will probably be snow in Miami.

  27. 54 here. but we’re supposed to break 70!!!

    *looks at calendar and cries

  28. I wore flannel jammies to bed last night.

  29. *checks snow report up at Boyne

    Huh. No runs open yet.

  30. I had to go out to the barn this morning before sunrise. I put on a sweater.

  31. Morning, children.

  32. Pretty nice weather in Tennessee. I may be moving here for work.

  33. 54 degrees here this morning.

  34. The wife and I have talked about TN a few times. They’ve had a few openings at an AFB down there that she liked.

    Since I’m soon to be untethered to MI by anything but family and a few friends, I’d consider it more strongly now.

  35. I ain’t buyin the pjs

  36. Get the pjs; you know you want ’em.

  37. OTOH, if the remote work thing ever crashes and burns, my old office is full of people who like me and might get me hired… back?

    The whole thing is so weird. I’m the only one in my cohort staying with the company and thus the only one leaving. We have lunches for people who resign and wish them well and stuff, but this time everyone else is “quitting” and I’m going away.

  38. Article on the illegal immigrants literally dying trying to get in had the comment, “They’ll still be voting Democrat.”

  39. My sil lives in TN. It’s a nice place to visit, but … you know the rest.

  40. GND wants the PJs. Damn you Cyn.

  41. Are there chaps.

  42. MJ, just get one set to share and wear the bottoms yourself.

  43. I’d buy the chaps

  44. Or, I guess, you could be weird and just wear the top.

    Which is hot on a girl but makes a guy Porky Pig.

  45. Ok, images that I don’t want in my head. Thanks a lot!

  46. You’re welcome!

  47. Of course there are chaps. Did you want ’em with the ass or assless?

  48. Do you have crotchless?

  49. We’ve had this talk, chaps are like old men: no ass.

  50. chaps = no ass or crotch. If they have either, they’re pants.

  51. Speaking of which, if chaps have no ass, then where did the phrase “chaps my ass” come from?

    Probably a Democrat.

  52. > chaps = no ass or crotch

    so you’re still saying they’re like old men.

  53. It’s not that old men don’t have crotches, it’s just that everything has migrated down.

    Not that I would know.

  54. “Chap” comes from the thing that the garment is supposed to protect from. Injury from a harsh or unpleasant environment. Chapped lips, chapped hide. Chaps are what you wear so the brambles and cold so forth don’t chap your hide.

  55. You guys should really be concentrating on how to get me a new phone, not assless chaps.

    Did I mention that I composted my iPhone the other day?


    but at least now Dave can no longer harass me with his phone calls.

  56. all chaps are assless, otherwise they’re pants

  57. I see I’m late to the pants party.

    Sorry about your phone Car in. Answer it.

  58. ANd I’m so in the mood to talk to dave right now. It’s really a shame.

    so i don’t know what I’m going to do. I’m reading up on how people scam you with stolen phones you cannot activate.

  59. Did I mention that I composted my iPhone the other day?


    And you want an iPad.

  60. Is an iPhone brown or green?

  61. How do you compost an iPhone?

  62. I have an extra iPhone 4. I can blank it and send it to you.

  63. DO YOU MJ?? You don’t need it?

    Wait, I think it has to be verizon or it’s no good. I don’t know how this stuff works.

    What I do know, if that if your phone falls into a tomato waiting to be taken to the compost pile, even thought JUST A TINY CORNER of it is on the composting fruit, with an otterbox on it … you will compost your phone.

  64. One of my rotten kids knocked it off the higher counter, onto the lower counter, and it landed on the tom.

  65. Or, I guess, you could be weird and just wear the top.

    Which is hot on a girl but makes a guy Porky Pig.

    I’ve often wondered about that. Everyone else who is an animal, Bugs Bunny, Daffy Duck, Tweety, Sylvester — they’re all buck naked. Just not Porky. Why? Is it some kind of kosher thing at Warner Brothers? And why does Donald Duck do the same thing? In a kinky sailor suit no less? Why is Pluto naked but Goofy wears human clothes?

    I just think all cartoonists are pervs. Except that guy who draws Dondi. He scares me.

  66. How do you compost an iPhone?

    There’s an app.

  67. The 4 has a removable SIM card. If you have the SIM from your composted phone you can just switch it.

  68. So, landing a phone on a tomato incapacitates it. Noted.

  69. I suspect Lois Lerner kept a compost pile in her office.

  70. Does that work? It has a SIM card.

  71. It should work, that’s where your carrier information is stored. The phone is the same. As long as both are 4.

  72. But what is it all about CDMA and GSM networks.

    How if the phone is one, it won’t work on the other?

  73. I have a strong feeling that I’ll be living where it snows in the next year or so.

    My cousin is moving to Colorado in September. She posted on FB how she couldn’t wait to live somewhere where there was snow. My response, “Just wait until you get your first blizzard in June.”

    I think I shattered her illusions.

  74. Worst case it fails and you mail it back and both of you are out a few bucks.

  75. I don’t have an iPhone, but I think the SIM card is where the connection information is too. The CDMA and GSM are network protocols IIRC, and that info is on the sim card.

    You’ll have to call your provider afterwards, to make sure you have the correct phone hardware number on the card, too.

  76. Looks like you found a possible issue, Car in. Good catch!

  77. CDMA = unique user ID per phone exclusively
    GSM = unique user ID on removeable card, can go into other GSM phones

  78. I wonder if Apple is working on a salad-proof iPhone.

  79. Plus, I’m wondering if MJ’s phone is some special, really tiny one?

  80. My old GPS charger shit the bed on this trip, I’m sure I can repair it when I get home, loose wire needs re soldered. Everybody gives me shit because I don’t use my phone for a GPS, but I had to this trip and apparently it hammers the battery, it died on me before lunch and I had no connectivity to use my laptop to find my hotel. Luckily I remembered the street and found it the old fashioned way. I asked a hooker how to get there.

  81. On one hand:

    On the other:

  82. And why does Donald Duck do the same thing? In a kinky sailor suit no less?

  83. Luckily I remembered the street and found it the old fashioned way. I asked a hooker how to get there.

    A good giggle to start the morning. Good job, pup.

  84. Did you tip her?

  85. MJ on his cell phone

  86. RIP Johnny Winter

  87. This nation will get whom it deserves, good and hard.

    Hillary Clinton, the former secretary of state who is preparing to run for president on a populist platform of fighting income inequality, demanded $2,777 per minute for two university speaking engagements and insisted on contracts that cut off reporters’ access to her and limited the number of photos she would take with well-wishers.

  88. That’s what I make, too. Nothing to see here, move along!

  89. That’s certainly my price.

    No one pays it, so I don’t speak often. But that’s my price.

  90. Kim Kardashian’s has an app…
    — and that app is so successful that it is on its way to raking in a total of $200 million in revenue by the end of the year.

    The app appears to be quite the addictive experience, as many of the App Store reviews bemoan the impact the game is having on users’ bank accounts. Tracie Morrissey from Jezebel knows this feeling well, having recently admitted to blowing a whopping $500 on in-app purchases.

    Sometimes I think Homo sapiens has bifurcated into separate species. Maybe more than two.

  91. Entitled fucking whore liar. Couldn’t even beat a jackass empty suit with zilch experience.

  92. Entitled fucking whore liar

    At her age, any fucking is likely metaphorical, if nonetheless noxious.

  93. It’d take a 50 gallon drum of lube.

  94. Best campaign ad ever.

  95. I bet Bill would do it. He did at least one other time.

  96. Wrong George, it doesn’t have castration as the topic, and pigs squealing in the background.

  97. I bet Bill would do it. He did at least one other time.

    Web. Hubbell.

  98. I was being nice, and making a point, leon. Quit peeing in my Cheerios.

    (gluten free, BTW)

  99. Only 81 here this morning. So far.

  100. Sure hope you have a jacket, xbrad. Stay warm!

  101. So who shot down the airliner, Russia or Ukraine? Story at AOS:

  102. I don’t really need a jacket, J’ames.

  103. My money is on the Russians. The Ukrainians have lost a couple planes to anti aircraft missiles lately.

  104. Sounds like it was Ukrainian airspace, though. One story is blaming the Ukrainians.

  105. Web Hubbell’s Penis is an awesome band name.

  106. The pro-Russian separatists have been shooting at Ukrainian military planes for a while now.

    But the Ukrainian government troops haven’t had to worry about airplanes overhead. So they haven’t been shooting down airplanes.

  107. Verizon Ph0nes usually don’t have sim cards.

  108. Your not SOL though Car In. If MJ sends you the unit and Verizon can activate it u will probably be able to sync it to the computer you used to back up.

  109. Looks like Jesse Jackson is shaking down Twitter over diversity. Gotta chuckle when Silicon Valley rich liberals have to bend over for a rectal exam.

  110. Geo, that IS the best campaign ad ever. Thank you, I’m adding it to my collection.

  111. Looks like Jesse Jackson is shaking down Twitter over diversity.

    What, not enough philandering pastors out there? Sharpton is right there.

  112. Why Malaysian Airlines? Jeez. Tragic.

  113. In the header pic, what instrument does the furry play?

  114. flute

  115. In the header pic, what instrument does the furry play?

    Skin flute.

    Hairy Bagpipes.

  116. I think Jesse Jackson ought to pressure Twitter to be more inclusive by hiring ministers who cheat on their wives. I’m nearly certain Twitter now employs none.

  117. In the header pic, what instrument does the furry play?

    One Direction. The Catcher.

  118. A Ukrainian official said a passenger plane carrying 295 people was shot down Thursday over a town in the east of the country, and Malaysia Airlines tweeted that it lost contact with one of its flights over Ukrainian airspace.

    Why are they tweeting this stuff? Twitter, really?

  119. I can’t buy into Obama being a hairy bear. Body hair requires too much testosterone.

    His wife, yes.

  120. I can’t buy into Obama being a hairy bear. Body hair requires too much testosterone.

    I have to give him props. Do you know how hard it is for a fifty year old man to maintain that twink look?

  121. Just one day after announcing that its new Thor would be a woman, Marvel’s Chief Creative Officer Joe Quesada appeared on Comedy Central’s The Colbert Report to announce that the new Captain America would be a black man.

    Will Marvel let him be responsible for committing most violent crime too?

    Jus’ keepin’ it reals, dog.

  122. Do you know how hard it is for a fifty year old man to maintain that twink look?

    He must go through gallons of spirit gum, gluing on all that fur.

  123. Marvel’s Chief Creative Officer Joe Quesada

    Seriously, is this even for real?

    The guy’s name is “Joe Cheesy?”

  124. Troll Comics: Earth’s Diversiest Heroes

  125. Seriously, they retconned in a black man used as the beta test for the Super Soldier Serum back in the late 80’s (I think) as Marvel’s way of sticking it to the military over the Tuskegee Experiment. I think he “died” at some point, but we all know that’s meaningless.

    Nick Fury was also a white guy at one point. No retcon, the one in the movies is literally from a different Marvelverse than the rest of the Avengers. Probably also from a different Archiverse.

  126. Let’s just get it over with and ethnically cleanse whitey from all comics. Except for Invisible Boy. You can’t see his skin anyway.

  127. Why does Scrappy Doo generate so much H8? *Cartoon/Comic blog

  128. After recieving a dose of the Super Soldier Serum from Steve Roger’s semen, Archie becomes the new Captain America. Donning pink spandex with a rainbow painted shield, he fights against a new array of enemies including Christians, Neo-Nazis, Christians, boy scouts, Christians, Orthodox Jews (BAN CIRCUMCISION!), and Christians.

  129. Which one will be gay? Aquaman doesn’t count.

  130. Joe Quesada moonlights under the name “Hooper X”

  131. In Spiderman: 2099, Spidey was hispanic, because by then NYC won’t have white people anyhow.

    I don’t remember the character’s name. I really hope it wasn’t Pedro Parque.

  132. Marmaduke is racist. A Great Dane? Part of the pale ice peoples’ cultural oppression.

  133. Well this is Begging for a modern makeover.

    The Big Gov Handout Mountain

  134. In Marvel? It’ll probably end up being Colossus.

  135. The Family Circus by Bil Keane is heteronormative hate speech. In future it must feature two mommies, a transgendered son and a physically challenged black spivak questioning adopted human of indeterminate age and sex.

  136. GO, search for “Nietzsche Family Circus”.

  137. That Billy is a scamp.

    And Not Me? My favorite!

  138. There’s no room for an upstart comic publisher that doesn’t bother with this crap, because the only reason the current ones are doing it is a weak attempt at relevance.

    You could do digital publishing, and start some sort of competitor, I suppose, but you’d have virtually no protection from piracy.

  139. Nietzsche Family Circus


  140. Nietzsche Family Circus

    Just shared that around.

  141. This is called Madefire

    I don’t know if you cats have checked it out or not. I’m not really an authority on comics but as the investment capital has dried up for independent film, a group of my associates have been working on developing stories in this format.
    The stories on Madefire seem a bit weak to me YMMV, but I am fascinated with the possibilities of the format.

  142. Online comics are starting to figure out business models that work. Most are Sunday strip types, and largely catered towards geeks or political junkies.

  143. In my class I use the question “Why does Hamas build schools and hospitals?” to illustrate the idea of internal and external support for an insurgency.

    Vox just provided a real world example.

  144. Why doesn’t Marvel have a half man half woman superhero?


  145. How about a furry superhero? His superpower is the ability to change from a pasty mid-forties man in a bunny suit to any other animal costume at will.

  146. Headline at WZ

    Crisis In Ukraine After Passenger Plane Shot Down… Obama Goes To The “Charcoal Pit” For Lunch – Update: 23 American Citizens Killed…

  147. I saw an interesting thought on twitter. Is MH17 the Archduke Ferdinand of airplanes?

  148. I read digital comics with comixology. When you do the guided view which focuses on one panel and advances as you would read it you can blaze through comic books quite fast. I read 100 issues of The Walking Dead as I was half watching football one last year. Amazon just bought the company out.

    Madefire looks interesting, I’ll check it out.

  149. For George:

    You’re welcome.

  150. Madefire spends the time to build in atmosphere. All the cells pan and zoom and there ambient sound and atmospheric animation, which is why we filmmakers have explored the format as a project development tool.

  151. The video showed off some of those features. There’s a lot of potential to the medium and I’m looking forward to it. Project development tool makes sense.

  152. For George:

    You’re welcome.

    This is clearly heteronormative, white male suppression and bigotry. Only someone as evil as Dick Cheney would believe a female superhero must wear pink tights and high heels. How dare Hub impose its cultural prejudices and preconceptions upon the idea of a superhero whose nature involves transsexual transformation.

    More power to the womynses!

    Besides, Shezow really needs to spend more time exploring his/her/xer/spivaker sexuality. If there is time afterwards, Shezow can battle carbon emissions and global warming.

  153. yessir.

  154. A truly progressive Nick Fury’s greatest weapon would be uptwinkles.

  155. Heh. Shezow! I don’t think that one made it through pilot season.

  156. Obama has fundraisers today. he can’t be bothered.

  157. Who shot down the plane? Hillary Clinton likely believes at this point, what difference does it make?

  158. Don’t worry Car in. I just read that he and Putin have spoken by phone.

    Er, maybe worry….

  159. Don’t worry Car in. I just read that he and Putin have spoken by phone.

    Okay, I’ll say it: this is a lie. I don’t believe it. Some flunky in the White House probably spoke to someone in Moscow, but Licorice Dick is too busy eating hamburgers and bumping fists to be bothered.

  160. Sounds like the work of another sinister YouTube video.

  161. Consider — we still don’t know where Barry was while the Benghazi massacre was taking place. And he was actually somewhere in the White House at this time. Probably sleeping, or rubbing one out.

    And now we are supposed to believe that within minutes he’s taking the time out of his light schedule to speak to Putin? Dog dew.

  162. Sounds like the work of another sinister YouTube video.

    Susan Rice has identified it.

  163. Nice.

  164. Wiser, put this one on your show if you like it.

  165. Ooops. does that type of URL still make the blog go Kablooie? I forgot to TinyURL it. I hope we don’t go rally west here.

  166. Sweet! Rick is Rolling!

  167. Don’t know who *did it*.
    Know who took credit for it:

  168. In my class I use the question “Why does Hamas build schools and hospitals?” to illustrate the idea of internal and external support for an insurgency.

    For the same reason Pablo Escobar did.

  169. President Barack Obama is scheduled to attend two Democratic fundraisers in New York City Thursday evening…
    The political activity apparently is not ceasing despite the Malaysian jet that was downed earlier Thursday over Ukraine killing 295 people. A Ukrainian government official has alleged the plane was shot down.
    …Obama will attend a Democratic National Committee fundraiser at a private home in New York at 5:45 p.m. Then at 7:30 p.m., the president will attend a fundraiser at another private home to raise money for the House Majority PAC…

    Hey, it’s not like there was this call at 3 am.

  170. And the same reason Senator Byrd did, really, only he used your money to do it.

    Pablo was less of a criminal, in many ways.

  171. Well, the sun is broken. I just read it on the intergnehts so I KNOW it is true. I’m pretty sure we all are going to have to leave our cars running all the time and start massive tire fires just to keep the global warming going. Good thing we shut down all the coal fired atmosphere warmers.
    Prius owners will now get a tax credit if they trade up to giant one ton dually diesel trucks. Bonus credit if said trucks have plastic testicles hanging from the bumper.

  172. Bonus credit if said trucks have plastic testicles

    Licorice Dick has those, although he isn’t a truck.

  173. Urk. I should never argue politics with family. I always forget.

    I blame gluten. Made pizza today on the grill. Crust was meh, but the sauce was good.

  174. Urrrrrgh… if I see one more person talking about how the Palestinians are ‘treated as second class citizens’ or how they ‘had their land stolen from them’ I am going to fucking destroy my computer. HISTORY – IT’S KIND OF AN IMPORTANT FUCKING THING.

  175. Comment by Mr Chumpo on July 17, 2014 1:13 pm

    Well this is Begging for a modern makeover.

    I shit you not: I just had the best LSD flashback evar.

  176. My Pet Goat was teh worst thing evah! during 9/11. Obama knows how to handle a crisis where Americans died in a plane shoot down:

  177. 23 Americans killed by terrorists but DAMN GOOD BURGERS. RT @ZekeJMiller: Obama per pool: “Biden told me the burgers are pretty good.”—
    (@CatsPolitics) July 17, 2014

    The emperor is not only naked, but he has secret sauce and dill relish dripping down his chest.

  178. You would think a guy who can halt the rising oceans could deter a few barbarians with anti-aircraft missiles.

    Maybe he’ll get a dipstick and measure the Potomac. That’ll show ’em.

  179. So the IDF sends ground forces into Gaza. This might actually make Obama drop his cheeseburger.

  180. Ground invasion has now started.

  181. While Licorice Dick says we “might have a tragedy” in the Ukraine, we definitely have one in the White House.

  182. The whole Israel/Palestine conflict is one of those things that I almost can’t talk about, because people are so misinformed it just makes me furious. Now I’m going to have to avoid most of the internet for a day or two to avoid all of the people screaming about how Israel is committing genocide.

  183. Remember who wants more wind power in The Nation Below Canada.

  184. WTH!

    It would take a SA-11/SA-17 to take out a jet at FL 330.

    Or a fighter firing a missile ala Korean Air.

    Shit may be getting real.

  185. Phat, what sort of missile does the Buk launcher use?

  186. Does Ukraine have that kind of missile, phat?

  187. GO, according to my quick search “SA-17” is the designation for the Buk.

  188. Obama has fundraisers to attend tonight. I doubt he’ll be able to watch the news. Maybe he’ll find out about this tomorrow?

  189. Poor Beary, he got loose, and the man is trying to coop him up!

    Fly free, little Beary!

  190. I didn’t know you could teach a bear to use a pen and a phone.

  191. Wanting 0bama to stay at a big white house in the South and work is almost certainly racist.

  192. Beary. ICWUDT.

    Cyn, I keep waiting and waiting for flashback and womp womp nothin’. I feel that as a yoot, I may have been misled by many many after school specials and anti drug communiqués.

  193. So, today’s pretty fuckin weird, huh?

  194. **looks at watch**

    **wonders what’s taking N. Korea so long to jump in the mix**

  195. Yeah, it’s as if our foreign policy mngmt has been whistle’ past the graveyard and all of a sudden that shiz aint flying’.

  196. Kim Jung Un will jump in next week. Takes him a while to ramp up.

  197. George,

    Don’t know the missile, the platform/missile is the same.

    When you hear SA-7/Sa-9 it’s shoulder-launched.

    Sa-11/17 are part of a large vehicle and would require deliberate command orders to hit an aircraft at FL 330.

    This will go pear-shaped very quick.

  198. Will the ‘Kill Kim Jung Un’ movie (be released in time for TITS?

    That could be fun.

  199. I *suspect* the Buk missile system was a battery that was captured/abandoned in E. Ukraine. That’s pure supposition on my part. But it’s quite plausible. And don’t forget Ukraine has lots of former conscripts, some of whom certainly had worked on the Buk.

    Last week, they popped an An-26 at an altitude that strongly implied that it wasn’t a shoulder launched missile.

  200. A supposed “witness” to the crash of a Malaysian airliner in Ukraine told MSNBC’s Krystal Ball Thursday that it appeared to have been shot down by a “blast of wind from Howard Stern’s ass.”

    He then called her a “dumbass” when she didn’t seem to understand she was being punked.

    Ball appeared to either not hear him or understand the joke about Stern, immediately asking the “sergeant” about his military training and what sort of missile system he thought had taken down the plane.

    That clinches it. Obama will replace Chuck Hagel with Krystal Ball.

  201. Well, Imma have a beer before the works gets all shooty again.

    Cheers, you all.

  202. Can’t I just eat my waffle?

    That will be inscribed under Obama’s visage on Mt Rushmore, wingnuts!

  203. Krystal Ball. That woman is so dense she used to work in a nuclear power plant as shielding.

  204. Comment by daveintexas on July 17, 2014 4:48 pm

    So, today’s pretty fuckin weird, huh?

    Jeebus yes.

  205. I hope none of you ever need blood in the Bay Area.

    In 1983, as the AIDS epidemic was raging, gays and bisexual men were banned from donating blood by the FDA. Now San Francisco Supervisor Scott Wiener has introduced a resolution to end the ban, and the city board is expected to approve it.

  206. Did today start with the Gaza tunnel attempt or are my days running together now?

  207. GO, it isn’t fair that their right to donate blood is being violated. H8R

  208. GO,

    I’m about ready to get a bracelet that says, “No blood donations”. better than picking up something. They claim that blood will be checked, but how long before there’s pressure to reduce the number of rejected donations from gay men due to optics?

  209. Did you know that donated blood is safe and meticulously tested?
    I assumed it was, and it turns out that it is.

  210. Since when does the SF City council get to overrule the FDA?

  211. Any screening test, fr’instance HIV, works better if you preselect your pool with screening questions. Some statistical shit or sumfin.

  212. Ummm, right on that page, Mr Chumpo:

    Do not donate Blood to Learn Your HIV Status

    Some people think that donating blood is a better way to learn their HIV status than asking their doctor for an HIV test or visiting a clinic. This is not true. You should not donate blood to find out if you are HIV-positive.

    Why? Because the HIV tests used to screen donor blood are highly accurate—but they aren’t perfect. If you have been infected with HIV recently, even the most sensitive test may not show it, and you can infect others if your blood is transfused to them.

    unless you were kidding, then hahaha

  213. Ah, so they’re just approving the process of allowing the most at-risk persons from donating blood, thereby using more materiel and personnel on supplies that have a higher chance of being discarded after testing anyway.

    The Inclusion Pantomime is more important than efficiency and results.

    Good to know.

  214. Jimbro, did you read that the Red Cross sells it’s donated blood for ~$225 a pint? That more than covers the cost of collection, Inspection, storage, delivery right? Maybe I’m missing something.

  215. We had a bright 4th year student come through on a one month rotation a few years ago who also happened to be gay. He was disappointed he wasn’t allowed to donate blood at a drive organized at the hospital. I was surprised that he didn’t know in advance. Maybe he just learned he was gay…

  216. Optics have always been more important than results to the Left, lauraw. You know that.

  217. I didn’t know that. It makes sense though, someone needs to pay for all the stuff. We have a Pathologist who runs our blood bank who is renowned for decreasing transfusion rates at our hospital. I can’t tell you the last time we’ve had to transfuse a scoliosis patient. When I first started they’d often get 1-2 units of packed RBC’s over the course of their stay.

  218. Meanwhile at the Oval Office

  219. Part of the reason I won’t donate blood is because I’m afraid to find out what’s in there.

  220. We have a Pathologist who runs our blood bank who is renowned for decreasing transfusion rates at our hospital

    He’s not recycling, is he?

  221. Yes Jay,
    I read that but it’s the next section down that explains that they “test” the blood supply.
    I’m not saying that, as Jimbro pointed out, outliers couldn’t be minimized by pre draw question airs, however, going to further lengths to preclude individuals with higher risk lifestyle choices from donating blood is the kind of Stazi crap that I fundamentally disagree with.

    If everyone needs to be pre cleared to give blood, fine. Make the law and enforce it. Optics and politics are powerful motivators yes, but ambiguity in guidelines is the problem to be fixed.

  222. *head explodes*

  223. He’s not recycling, is he?

    Of course not. He’s an Eastern European gentleman of distinguished heritage.

  224. Hah! Nope, not recycling! He is a nerd who has an intense focus on the topic. As a result of his efforts he has educated most of us and saved a shit ton of patients from transfusions. A lot of this stuff is counter intuitive. In residency we learned a lot of conventuals wisdom about transfusion that when studied rigorously, just ain’t so.

  225. conventional

    Damn autocucumber

  226. You know who could have played an awesome Putin in a movie?
    Image search on Vladek Sheybal.

  227. Damn autocucumber

    They sell those at The Pleasure Chest in West Hollywood.

  228. The Pleasure Chest!!! I used to do my Christmas shopping there. How funnah, ask for Dente’ He’ll hook you up!


    The full eligibility requirements for donating blood. Contrary to popular belief, this isn’t just hating on homos.

  230. George, what have you been smoking?
    Cigar wise?

  231. What the
    The hell is this…
    Okay, now I have to see this movie.
    This could be the greatest cinematic gem since Ben-Hur.

  232. Here’s another one for your show Wiser.

  233. if I see one more person talking about how the Palestinians are ‘treated as second class citizens’

    Palestinians are being treated like second class citizens. By Hamas.

    More production line victims = more money for the new millionaire’s club.

    Israel isn’t doing it because the palestinians don’t live in Israel.

  234. OMFG.
    It’s on netflix.

  235. Odd, everytime I hear “bear” I think “buttplug”, why is that?


    This link worked perfectly for Fox News streaming. No ads. No bullshit.

  237. Good gravy, there is this gay guy on faceass who constantly rants about heteros being meanies to teh gheys.

    Today he’s wondering why heteros are obsessed with gays because someone was wondering if the new woman Thor will become gay. Shush he says, just shush already.

    Dude, that includes you and your taking over posts with your gay rants. Shush already.

  238. Wow. Interesting bit about CJD and insulin.

  239. Is it terrible to wish that John McCain is struck by laryngitis?

  240. I have also wondered why if a needle stick can transfer HIV why can’t a mosquito? I had one person at the blood center, has he was putting blood in in cooler, tell me because the virus can’t live in the cold mosquito… I think that I heard that there is a strain of TB that is being easily transmitted by mosquitoes, the initial and difficult process of transmitting the disease is done by illegals, the mosquito part is easy.

  241. I did not know you could transmit CJD. I thought you could only contract it and that by ingesting spinal materials.
    *throws out Little Prince British Insulin Freebasing Rig*

  242. The header pic is priceless. I just noticed it.

  243. That’s a useful link MJ. Thank you.

    How do I contract Rad Cow disease? That would be awes.

  244. CJD from Viagra?

    Crooked Jimmy Dick is some serious shit

  245. Interesting bit about CJD and insulin.

    Say what??

  246. Well, Cyn it turns out that one may be a carrier of Cruczfeld Jenkins Disease if one had used English Bovine Insulin in the descant past.

    I am as surprised as you must be.

  247. Want a Margarita?

    Me too. Jay? May we have two with out F Salt?

  248. Thanks for the Exec Summary, Chumpo; I was hoping it wasn’t the current schtuff. Not sure if you’ve been back around long enough, but my 13 y.o. Axeman was diagnosed a Type 1 Diabeetus Insulin user about two years ago.

    Holy shit, has it really been two years now? Day-um.

  249. Hell yeah I’m in for a Margarita.

    For medicinal purposes, of course.

  250. Can I get synthetically manufactured tequila?

  251. That was a cool read; mmmwah, Jimbro!

  252. Love The Jimbro, so smaht.

  253. *gets the little foldy umbrellas ready for the margaritas and waits*

  254. Reuters has a map up showing the flight path of the the Malaysian Air flight, it’s predicted path, and the crash site. Phat, is it possible that the pilots were that far off path and didn’t realize it?

  255. How’s yer leg today, Toots?

  256. Particularly ouchie, thank you for axing. I experimented last night by not taking my Flexeril, to see how the healing was coming along.

    I am not a smrt woman.

  257. Juan Williams is correct: Obama is paying attention, it’s not that he isn’t.

    He’s wrong is assuming that Obama cares. He doesn’t.


  258. In fact, I think I’m gonna get some ice… for my Absolut chaser.

  259. Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-Nev.) says immigrants who came to the country illegally at a young age are now legitimate residents and should not be deported.

    “Before Republicans help our Border Patrol agents and all the personnel trying to do something to handle this humanitarian crisis, they want President Obama to deport the Dreamers who are already here, legitimately here,” he said on the Senate floor Thursday morning.

    Licorice Dick’s whole schtick of making up law out of thin air is getting really popular. I guess putting this stuff in bills and voting on it is too inconvenient.

  260. Licorice Dick’s whole schtick of making up law out of thin air is getting really popular. I guess putting this stuff in bills and voting on it is too inconvenient.
    They’re just taking advantage of the public’s ignorance. 9/10 people don’t understand the separations of power. They think the president is like a king.

    It was bound to happen.

  261. I’ve taken to referring to the presidency as dictator-for-four-years. Besides, I suspect most people are genetically predisposed against freedom and long for a king. The American experiment has been completed, and the results are negative.

  262. You don’t think the genie can be put back in the bottle, GO?

  263. No.

  264. Jimbro, did you read that the Red Cross sells it’s donated blood for ~$225 a pint? What? I hate the Red Cross already for diverting donations for a specific cause to the general fund. Now I hatey-hate them more.

    I could never give blood because of periodically taking anti-malaria pills for travel to oddball places. They banned you for quite a while for that, IIRC.

    Sorry for the leg, Cyn. I was hoping that would be starting to get better.

  265. Jimbro, did you read that the Red Cross sells it’s donated blood for ~$225 a pint?

    Well, that’s still cheaper than a bottle of Chateau Pétrus.

  266. Or Opus One.

  267. I’m banned from donating blood because I lost weight.

    True story.

  268. Probably a lot cheaper than a Cabernet.
    Beef & Iron (Blood) Wine

  269. We were getting $5 a pint in college.

    We were ripped off.

  270. Dave, please tell Warren on LinkedIn that he is not, in fact, “persuing” job opportunities. Assuming you actually like him and want him to find work.

  271. Boo!

  272. Cyn?

  273. The entire world could be in flames and SCOAMF would grin while ordering a cheeseburger. Fuck him and anyone who voted for the empty suit!

  274. The entire world could be in flames and SCOAMF would grin while ordering a cheeseburger. Fuck him and anyone who voted for the empty suit!
    It is. He did.


  275. I don’t know Warren so inasmuch as I have no investment in him Ima let him deal with his own shit. Perhaps someone who knows him will help a brother out.

  276. Fair enough. Figured I’d toss that out in case you cared.

  277. So, anything interesting going on today?

  278. So, anything interesting going on today?

    Superman is still hetero. So far.

  279. I’m banned from donating blood because I lost weight.

    True story.

    It wasn’t the weight loss so much as the Kaposi’s sarcoma.

  280. It’s gonna be a low speed persuit.

  281. Actually it was a high liver enzyme count, which is a sign of TB (which I didn’t have, obviously) or of recent weight loss, which I had at the time.

    So, banned for life unless I go through the hoops of proving I didn’t have TB 19 years ago. Which you’d think I could do just by not being dead when I offer to donate.

  282. Superman is still hetero. So far.

    Yeah, but he’s into those Amazon chicks. Obviously closeted.

  283. Which one of you philistines wanted a margarita without salt? Chumpo?

    What’s next, a Zima?

  284. *raises hand*

    Double salt for me please.

  285. I like salt Jay. I said “Please hold the “F” salt as it chafes and stings (not in the good way)

  286. >> Fair enough. Figured I’d toss that out in case you cared.

    AH… too long a day. Thanks Leon.

    I can’t give blood because I had Hepatitis B back in 79

  287. Wait for it…

    Wait for it…

    Wait for it…


  288. Cheers Kitty. Ima saw that leg off if it doesn’t start cooperating.

  289. I’ll gas up the chain saw and get ‘er warmed up for ya, Chumpo.

  290. FUCK SALT

    Yay! There it is!

  291. Mr. Chumpo, Jimbro’s gonna be butthurt if you steal his whole amputatin’ schtick.

  292. Let’s see… Hamlet spurned Ophelia, so: gay. Captain Ahab spent his life among sweaty men on a ship: gay. Also, Ishmael and Queequeg slept in a bed together. Super gay. Don Quixote played dress-up and lived with a manservant: role-playing gay. Huck Finn hangs around an older black man, cruising a river: biracial man-boy gay. Jake Barnes can’t commit to Brett Ashley, and likes to go camping with guys in the woods. Closet gay. Robinson Crusoe is so tight with his dude that it’s become a common phrase: His man Friday. Desert island gay. Sherlock Holmes likes mainlining cocaine and rooming with an unmarried dude who takes like forever to get married. Double secret mystery gay.

    I don’t know. I just can’t find any serious literature where the male characters aren’t gay. And ChickLit is all gay. Is there anything that isn’t?

  293. Can’t really blame ol’ Supe for being hot for an Amazon

  294. Gravity’s Rainbow is (kind of) about a dude who nails a bunch of chicks in London. After which, rockets strike near the scene of his conquests. Not gay. Lolita is about a man who drives cross-country molesting his tween stepdaughter. Creepy, but not gay.

  295. What is used more to treat diabeetus….synthetic or cow/pig?

  296. Gravity’s Rainbow? Yeah, but that dreamish sequence where Slothrop is swimming down a toilet into a sewer? Toilet fantasy: gay. Plus, rainbow is in the novel’s name. Bonus gay.

    Lolita? Shelley Winters in the movie creeped me out so badly I wanted to become gay.

  297. What has Rosetta been up to?

    (Note to Cyn, didn’t upload for poat, so I don’t know if I did the no-linky thing right. Also, pixellated enough?)

  298. Yeah, but that dreamish sequence where Slothrop is swimming down a toilet into a sewer? Toilet fantasy: gay.

    On the other hand, he’s swimming down to toilet to avoid being raped by the negroes, so: not gay.

  299. Might be gay but racist.

  300. Hmm. “Contact binary” sounds like a new sexual orientation. “I self-identify as a contact binarysexual.”

    So yeah, Rosetta must be involved.

  301. On the other hand, he’s swimming down to toilet to avoid being raped by the negroes, so: not gay.

    Ah, you misperceive the metaphor… the toilet is a water closet… diving into the closet to escape: gay.

  302. WASHINGTON (AP) — The Bureau of Prisons has rejected the Army’s request to accept the transfer of national security leaker Pvt. Chelsea Manning from a military prison. So the military will begin treatment for her gender-identity condition.

    A defense official said Defense Secretary Chuck Hagel has approved the Army’s recommendation to keep Manning in military custody and start a rudimentary level of gender treatment.

    The funniest thing here is that the AP actually refers to Manning as “her.”

  303. So the military will begin treatment for her gender-identity condition.

    “You’re a guy. Get over it. Taxpayers don’t want to pay for your choppadickoffame.”

    Sorry, I’m sure that was transphobic.

  304. If Chelsea starts “the change”, will it be featured on Mondays?

  305. Manning has been diagnosed with gender dysphoria, the sense of being a woman in a man’s body. Civilian prisons can provide treatment, but the Defense Department doesn’t have the medical expertise needed.

    Actually, General Dynamics has been working on a military contract to develop a machine for this, the CUT-P Mark III, nicknamed “the Vaginator.” Field trials begin in August at Camp Pendleton.

  306. XB I Plan on outsourcing once I get the contract, believe me.

  307. Give “her” a few years in the prison gym.

  308. Only if “Chelsea” bulks up. “She” doesn’t look very built from the photographs.

  309. Not buying this stuff, ever.

  310. I’ve read that “the change” isn’t nearly as permanent as it’s sold to be. You basically have to stay on super-high doses of the hormones for life to maintain just that little bit of superficial appearance of the other sex. Quit for a few months and no one will know you were even on them.

    Also, the hormones apparently raise your cancer risk more than a 2-pack a day habit.

  311. Actually, General Dynamics has been working on a military contract to develop a machine for this, the CUT-P Mark III, nicknamed “the Vaginator.”

    Dammit, who leaked that? Was is Steve? That guy cannot keep his damn mouth shut.

  312. 2 packs? I once heard that just living in a major city does the same reparatory damage as three smokes a day.

  313. respiratory.

    Fuch Salt.

  314. Mexico City was more than a pack a day.

  315. 3 smokes is nothing. Healthy lungs can deal with that.

  316. Sex change operations also often don’t result in happier people. Instead, they’re just miserable with tits or a fake wiener.

  317. Hey Scott, have you ever tried smoking with sassafras?

  318. I found out what to do with the papaya.

    1 oz tequila
    .5 oz cointreau
    .5 oz chambord
    2 oz papaya juice
    splash sour mix

  319. We’re thinking of getting a smoker, and that’s the only vaguely interesting tree we have handy. I think. I suck at identifying trees other than sassafras and about half a dozen others.

  320. That sounds pretty good, MJ.

  321. I would like to volunteer as a taster MJ. Whats it called, The CUT-P Mark III?

  322. You need a smoker, leon. With all the crock pot cooking you do, you’ll love it.

  323. Are you gonna strain it first, MJ? I don’t need any floss.

  324. Call it the “Come To Papaya.”

  325. The Coin Slot

  326. I would like to volunteer as a taster MJ. Whats it called, The CUT-P Mark III?
    It’s called the Mare Force 2000.

  327. How ’bout The Bloody Piss

  328. Still no confirmation of any US citizens aboard MH17, which has me thinking there probably aren’t.

  329. thought there was 28 Americans, xbrad.

  330. Chumpo, you’re sick.

    Nicely done.

  331. Leon, I’d hazard that your Michigan woods are as full of pin cherry and maples as ours are. And both are darn nice wood for smoking. Some oaks (NOT red oak), wild grapevines, crabapple, alder (most fruit and nut trees, actually), walnut, all fine.

    This is Scott’s guru. He gets into the woods about halfway down the scrolling page.

  332. you know it looks like one. I went to bar tending School.

  333. Jay, all Leon has to do is one well-crutched smoked, juicy brisket. All over for the crock pot.

    Scott was just saying the other day we are long overdue for one, too.

  334. Hi Laura W. How are you this night?

  335. J’ames, I keep hearing Americans were on board, but the only source I’ve seen is an Interfax tweet.

  336. Mmmm, Brisket, I’m overdue for one, too. Easily the best thing I’ve ever made with fire.

  337. The funniest thing here is that the AP actually refers to Manning as “her.”

    It chaps my ass seeing people/publications do this enabling bullshit. And “Chelsea”! Could that be any more gay? See he’s just gay, but I really won’t mind him getting his dick cut off.

    *thinks more on this* Why yesss, full steam ahead on Bradley’s notion, as matter of fact, let’s fast-track this baby.

  338. Anybody else getting the malicious website warning when opening the Hulk Usaa site?

  339. Mix up a round of CUT-P Mark IIIs, MJ.

    Lets get whacked!

  340. Hi Lipstick, What site?


    A friend (loosey goosey about security) recommended it and someone upthread mentioned it.

  342. Oh that. I did get a flash error msg the first time I loaded it but then I tried again and it loaded fine.

    No malicious website warning wither time.

  343. Thanks Chumpo. I’m still getting it every time, but, like Obama, my security is very anti-social and suspicious of outsiders.

  344. ~20 months to go, Babe.

    Goodnight Amigos!

  345. Roamicita,
    I wandered into the computer-room and saw a picture on Anitas monitor.
    It was FaceChimp picture of Baby you, and Mr. RFH, and baby Rocket-Boy!
    You were such cute children!

    How is Mr. RFH doing? Reacting to the antibiotics, pain-meds, miserable?
    I hope he feels better soon…

  346. Dis anybody motice that anybody else completely forgot to do something today?

  347. Sleep well, Chumpo.

  348. Thanks for asking, ChrisP. Mr. RFH gets tired easily but is doing better today than yesterday.

    Rocketboy turns 18 on Saturday. The day that pic was taken, he cried all the way to the church then slept through the entire photography session.

    I don’t know where the years went, but oh, to be that thin again.

  349. Great pic, Roamy. Dan and I have never been able to co-ordinate our retail schedules for the Church pic. Best thing about my parish is Confession 3x a day and twice on Saturday. Taking pics in late November? Not so much.

  350. I want a family pic before Rocketboy leaves for college. Four weeks. (panic)

  351. 4 weeks!!!! Will you driving out with him like Frankie on The Middle?

  352. She’s paying for his bus ticket, but he has to find his own way to the station.

  353. CoAlex killed it.

  354. Dan’s light duty will be gas station next week. We’re taking bets on hottest July on record. I was dumb enough to agree to help out at Membership. My logins don’t work due to less pay, but if a manager logs in I can help. Team player. Kill me nao!!!

  355. Home. Tired. Late boobs. Night.

  356. G’night

  357. I am incapable of eating anything with a sauce that won’t get on my shirt. SYWM. Invest in Shout.

  358. as much as I H8 the Bear references that are tied to TFG, I really love the headers. I miss Hover Bear.

  359. The “bear” crap with TFG is funny precisely because it’s so fake. It’s obviously an attempt to make him appear butch by a bunch of people who have no idea about what it means to be a real man.

  360. I feel like the HQ chicken! LOL

  361. Oso. There can be only one!!!! highlander’d/

  362. Cyn with the pro-rape You know you want it Blurred lines reference trigger and sucrose!!!!

  363. I’ve been wearing ponies for the last week. Pulls my face taut and hides the grey. Lots of compliments. Sun-dyed blonde. I can be dumb AND 10 years younger. (I don’t deal with bright bulbs on my best day.)

  364. Oso Wisdom: If he cheats WITH you; He’ll cheat ON you. /Rocket Surgery.

  365. Oso,

    No, no, don’t you understand: he loves me. He was unhappy with that whore, but obviously I can change him!

  366. FFS he has 2 kids under 3 and he doesn’t pay rent. You babysit HIS kids while he goes on reserve wknds. Yep, you are the next baby mama…well played hot body with the cute tat.

  367. Wiener alarm in 5….

  368. No weiner pics.

  369. I’m gonna tell you the way it is
    And I’m not gonna be derp or easy
    Your whole attitude stinks, I say
    And the life you lead is completely empty

  370. Buncha chatty cathys lately. Well done!

  371. Good morning J’Ames. So, it’s late boobs today.

    *demands membership fee rebate*

  372. I am hoping that this movie lives up to its promise and doesn’t go off the rails.

    I own more than half these songs and recognize nearly every one of them.

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