MMM 131: I got 4 hours sleep last night.

So you don’t get words today.

Boobs, though, you do get boobs.
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I don’t think that’s real grass.
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Camo this small seems sort of pointless, amiright?
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Circumstantial evidence suggests that her name might be Emily.
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This looks tricky.
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Yoga is a s3x cult.
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No, really.
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Friendship means helping with the big stuff.
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272 Comments

  1. Right out of the blocks, a repeat. A nice repeat, but a repeat nonetheless.

  2. Morning, children.

  3. I was gonna bitch about 4 1/2 hours sleep but apparently I’m at the wrong blog.

    P.S.: It’s not only the grass that’s fake on #2

    /GOML

  4. So, wakey wakey.

    What have I missed in the last 4 or 5 days.

    Someone summarize.

  5. Guests left yesterday. But fake doubles Sunday and Monday.

  6. I haven’t weeded the veggie garden since Tuesday, and we’ve had a ton of rain. Tomorrow is going to be busy.

  7. I got 2 garbage sacks of weeds from the fence and the side of the garage. Don’t have a compost pile, and are you supposed to compost weeds?

  8. You can but only if you do hot composting. To kill the weed seeds . I sometimes leave weeds in a garbage bag for a few weeks before I add them to the compost pile . Some people don’t chance it, but I like to live on the edge.

    Really bad weeds I burn .

  9. Dumb video, good song:

  10. Good morning.

  11. How can you set up a compost pile in limited space, and with an association?

  12. Tell them it’s to combat climate change and you’ll be all set.

  13. They have some composting containers that might work . In the summer, with added crap, it should compost things in a month. Or, you could just leave the stuff in black garbage bags. That works too. Just add some compost to the bag and give it a shake now and then.

  14. Comment by Jimbro on July 14, 2014 8:29 am

    You have got to be fucking kidding me?!

  15. fuck Archie I hated that guy

  16. They still sell Archie comics?

  17. I like the leave it in bags. I can put it behind the smoker. Will that be hot enough to kill the weeds?

  18. It’s like how British television shows always have a gay character.

    The left wants to convince everyone that gays are 50% of the population.

  19. It’s more like 90% of the population, you cis-gendered bigot.

  20. British television? HBO is that way now.

  21. Right out of the blocks, a repeat. A nice repeat, but a repeat nonetheless.

    The binders system isn’t perfect. It did look familiar to me, but they all do, since I’ve seen them at least once before the enbindering.

    I stopped having gay friends because it was too cliched.

  22. Showtime, too.

  23. 99% of the population said “who’s Archie?”

  24. He was a Saturday morning cartoon about 25 years ago.

  25. Yes. Add some dirt and keep it moist.

  26. Add some dirt and keep it moist.

    Wait, are we back to talking about Pepe’s finger again?

  27. Donkey Punch.

  28. Ha, that one is great, Pepe!

  29. Comment by PepeLp on July 14, 2014 10:05 am

    HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!

  30. Got home about 10:00 last night after dropping Rebecca off at camp.
    Sent DD#3 off to a friend’s house for the week.
    Mr. and Mrs. TiFW have the house all to themselves for the next few days, so you know what that means…..

    …..yup – we get to sleep past 6:00 every morning this week.

  31. Boobs, though, you do get boobs.

    *files lawsuit*

  32. Pupster, it’s okay. They aren’t big.

    I’d also be surprised if they’re real.

  33. Buncha Robins are having a massive pool party in the giant cooler lid. Hilarious.

  34. They all cheat at Marco Polo.

  35. Buncha Robins are having a massive pool party in the giant cooler lid. Hilarious.

    Have you made them all tiny little frozen worm margaritas yet?

  36. From Jimbro’s link re: Archie:

    In recent years, deaths of high-profile comic book characters like Peter “Spider-Man” Parker and Steve “Captain America” Rogers have made headlines and garnered intense reaction from fans. Goldwater notes that Andrews’ passing isn’t just a publicity stunt [he said during the interview that is designed to give publicity to a cartoon that most people had forgotten about years ago….] but also a lesson about gun violence and a declaration of diversity in the new age of Archie Comics.

    In other words, people who are still reading Archie comics are extremely stupid and weak-minded and we can take advantage of that to push our political viewpoints.

    Also:

    Other incarnations of Andrews will continue to live on in Archie Comics series.

    So wait… there’s other Riverdale “universes?” Like, one where Archie is dead but others where he is alive?? Seriously??

    And if that’s the case, is there one where Betty and Veronica are lesbians?

  37. Yes.

  38. so I fired up the laptop this morning and began to do my weekly prep work for my show and then I realized… I DON’T HAVE TO!!

    Stress level dropped immediately.

  39. Yes.

    Any idea where I can find those books?

  40. Wiser, there are already at least two parallel Archieverses: One where he marries Betty (i.e. the stupidverse), and one where he marries Veronica (i.e. awesometown).

    And if you’re reading Archie, you’re probably an old person with at least somewhat conservative cultural attitudes, so this might just be what kills your comic collecting. That or your presbyopia.

  41. YW

    http://tinyurl.com/nafe363

  42. One of my old neighbors was an Archie comic fan and collector. He was a nice guy, if a bit feebleminded. He had ALL the comics.

    Have you made them all tiny little frozen worm margaritas yet?

    Of course.

  43. Look at the nice thing Steve_in_hb sent me! http://youtu.be/gyXhysmMNhE

    Also, how long did you fellas stare at that Betty and Veronica picture?
    .
    .
    .
    .
    …guys?

  44. 50s chicks making out?

    Not hot.

  45. Huh? Wut?

  46. ha ha ha haaa!

  47. If 50’s chicks were that busy making out half of us wouldn’t be here.

  48. Wow. There’s quite a bit of Betty and Veronica Rule 34 out there.

  49. http://tinyurl.com/nafe363

    That’s it?

    Hell, Cyn does more than that after her 3rd vodka.

  50. *blushes*

    SHE SAID SHE WOULDN’T TELL

  51. Wow. There’s quite a bit of Betty and Veronica Rule 34 out there.

    Why am I shocked that Xbrad would know this?

  52. The younger geek at my local comic shop recommended “Afterlife With Archie”. Jughead’s dog gets killed by Reggie xdriving home drunk from a bar. He enlists Sabrina the teenage witch’s help to resurrect the dog from the dead. When he comes back he unleashes a zombie epidemic that sweeps through Riverdale. It has the gay guy, Kevin Keller, a lesbian couple and a pair of brother and sister gingers with a plot line suggesting incest between them. And I’ve just confirmed I’m a geek.

  53. If the publishers of Archie really wanted to shock the “normies”, they should have had Archie come out and start dating Moose..

  54. The younger geek at my local comic shop recommended “Afterlife With Archie”.

    I smell AMC series…….

  55. And then Moose could have announced that he was gay right before the NFL draft

  56. Reggie gets caught at a Bronie convention

  57. Mr. Weatherbee becomes the head of the local teacher’s union and gets arrested for beating up a protester at at rally to increase teacher’s wages and benefits.

  58. Veronica’s father is found dead, hanging naked in a closet. They have no proof, but police believe it was another case of auto-erotic asphyxiation gone badly.

  59. Pops has a backroom for dealing meth to the kids

    “I’ll have the cheeseburger special”

    *wink*

  60. Holy crap, I just found that guy. He lives in my town now! When I occasionally say ‘fanks,’ instead of ‘thanks,’ that is who I am mimicking.

    When we were little kids, he had a speech impediment and he couldn’t pronounce ‘th.’ Always substituted with an f.

    Against some stiff odds, he turned out to be a really nice person.

  61. Betty starts wearing long sleeves to cover the marks where she has been cutting herself.

  62. Moose gets off on being pegged by Big Ethel

  63. Jughead marries a smoking hawt chick and becomes obsessed with smoking meat

  64. You guys know a shitload more about Archie comics than I do.

    Fucking nerds.

  65. Miss Grundy gets arrested for nailing her students in the back seat of her car in the school parking lot.

  66. Hmmm. I always did like Jughead.

  67. Chemistry teacher Mr. Flutesnoot starts making meth. Not because he has cancer, but just because he’s an evil bastard.

  68. Chemistry teacher Mr. Flutesnoot starts making meth. Not because he has cancer, but just because he’s an evil bastard.

    That’s why I’d do it.

  69. Jeez, I never could afford comics. Don’t know anything about Archie.

  70. I thought Reggie was pimping out Betty and Veronica for $5 a blow by the dumpster behind the burger joint?

  71. Stolen from MesaBlue:

    http://tinyurl.com/pu3pg9u

  72. I’m such a waste of oxygen today. That weekend gig is brutal sometimes. Yesterday and Saturday there was a LOT of running. Ridicurous.

  73. I thought Reggie was pimping out Betty and Veronica for $5 a blow by the dumpster behind the burger joint?

    Alternate universe….

  74. I tried reading an Archie comic once. Once.

    Too ghey.

  75. They all cheat at Marco Polo.

    LOL

  76. I’m watching a Bluejay now, beasn. He sounds like a rusty swing and he won’t let any of the Robins in the bath at the same time. They’re all pissed off at him. And he came out of the lid looking a shaggy mess just like this one: https://c2.staticflickr.com/4/3909/14348389211_0f7221cb18_z.jpg

  77. Holy shit, I think I’m actually on vacation. Is this a day off? Holy shit.

  78. Hell, Cyn does more than that after her 3rd vodka.

    Every woman is bisexual after three appletinis.

  79. Bluejays can be real bastages. I nearly beat one up at our other house. He thought he owned the yard and stuck his head in a finch’s house to peck at the baby finches.

    They go after squirrels too.

  80. So will Archie comics do a very special series on how Kevin Keller and his “husband” contract AIDS from a random stranger that they pick up at the bar and take home one night?

  81. Oh, yeah they are. If they’re on the nest they will take up after absolutely anything.

  82. I also had an ongoing battle with someone’s cat. He’d leave dead songbirds on my doorstep and chase squirrels all the way up our huge tree. So when he would sun himself on our retaining wall, I’d crimp the hose, sneak around the corner, and let ‘im have it. BWAHAHAHAHA! Little shit.

  83. So will Archie comics do a very special series on how Kevin Keller and his “husband” contract AIDS from a random stranger that they pick up at the bar and take home one night?

    Yeah and one episode can be them battling the insurance company to cover for free, their extremely expensive meds that keep their viral load low so they can continue their hedonistic lifestyle without having to tell any of their dates of their status, ’cause condoms are icky.

  84. Dan has been cleared to go back to work with restrictions. He can’t lift more than 30# or bend more than 4 times an hour. Guess who gets to be a Greeter? Bwah ha ha

  85. Good news, Oso!

    I hope Mr. Firehydrant is on the mend, too.

  86. Yeah and one episode can be them battling the insurance company to cover for free, their extremely expensive meds that keep their viral load low so they can continue their hedonistic lifestyle without having to tell any of their dates of their status, ’cause condoms are icky.

    Yup, and it will end with a massive rally where Archie and friends declare that AIDS “can happen to anyone”. As if the disease is prowling the streets looking to prey on the preacher’s daughter.

  87. AIDS ATE MY BABY!!!!!

  88. AIDS turned me into a newt.

  89. And anyone who refers to themselves as a husband or a wife will be put in re-education camps!

    http://www.tpnn.com/2014/07/13/governor-moonbeam-makes-the-use-of-the-words-husband-and-wife-illegal-in-california/

  90. Me too, lauraw.

  91. obligatory:

  92. Holy shit. I think we’re turning into globetrotters. I just booked a ten day trip to Vienna, Prague, and Budapest for October 4, 2015. A trip to the Grand Hotel with friends, this September. Plus TITS in September. Plus we’re going on a five day road trip to Tobermory, Ontario, and then back around through Sault Set. Marie at the end of this week.

    Ima need a vacation from all the traveling.

  93. #humblebrag

  94. I had Budapest once.

    Worst week ever.

  95. The Ypsilanti, Michigan-based business unit of my company has been sold.

    I’m not part of that business (where I currently stand and who’s electricity currently charges my phone), so interesting times are afoot.

  96. *gets boxes ready*

    *looks at ikea.com for home office furniture*

  97. Jughead marries a smoking hawt chick and becomes obsessed with smoking meat

    Hahahaha!

  98. Ikea is crap.

  99. Second.

  100. The only thing I’ve ever bought from Ikea was lunch. The Swedish meatballs weren’t bad.

  101. Hi MJ!

    *waves*

    How’s your Monday going?

    This is mine:

  102. Hi Leon, Hi Scott!

    Xbrad.

  103. Hi Pupster.

    I have almost nothing to do. Monday is pretty accurate.

  104. High five kid looked like those Tom Brady gifs going around last fall.

  105. Puppy, that is such a funny gif/clip. you rule.

  106. Okayfinethen.

    *goes to Art Van*

  107. Cleanup after yesterday’s storm:

    http://tinyurl.com/nrc38je

    There are still a few haildrifts today.

  108. Wow, never seen haildrifts before.

    You guys been burning tires out there? Algore come for a visit?

  109. Holy shit, haildrifts?? Amazing.

    Also, Dogfish Head IPA?? Amazing. And way more delicious than hail.

  110. I just booked a ten day trip to Vienna, Prague, and Budapest for October 4, 2015.

    Wow, so did I. Leaving the 3rd or 4th.

  111. Hey, can I catch a ride with you, HS?
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    HS, are you there? Hello?
    ..
    .
    .
    Hello? Anyone?

  112. European Meat Up 2015. The guys get Speedos.

  113. *awkward*

  114. Dogfish Head makes some great beers with ineresting labels. One of my favorite artists did some labels for them. Tara McPherson.

  115. Pro tip:

    The potato goes in the front of the Speedo

  116. Roses go in front, big guy.

  117. haha, hopefully by October the Speedos will be safely put away for next year.

  118. haha, hopefully by October the Speedos will be safely put away for next year.

    You’ve obviously never been to Europe.

    The Speedos never go away…

  119. http://tinyurl.com/kbp5z7k

  120. I bought some small work lights from IKEA. LEDs and $10 each.

  121. Since no one asked, we finished up our softball season in 3rd place, our best ranking ever. (We were on our way to a great season last year, but I got hurt and the team lost the 4 games that I missed.)

    We crushed the other team yesterday. We scored 5 runs in the top of the 1st inning, they got up and scored 2runs, before we shut them down with a triple play. We then scored 12 runs in the second inning, batting around before we made our first out.

    Final score (after 4 innings): 23-5.

    I give the guys on our team a lot of credit. After being on the receiving end of that kind of whooping, we started taking it easy and stopped cheering.

    Other team seemed to appreciate that.

  122. Grumble, trying to find a FedEx package. Per tracking, it was delivered at 12:14, but, no package. Neighbors spend all day on their porch, and they say no FedEx truck came by today. FedEx is the worst delivery service around here. They’ll get back to me in 2 hours, maybe.

  123. Jewstin?

  124. Greetings, doofuses.

    (Doofi?)

  125. Holy crap – it’s raining outside!!!!! And sounds like small hail as well.

    And WTF happened to all of you people the past few days? Mr. Oso and Mr. RFH out of commission, Wiser saying he doesn’t have to prep for next week’s show, etc. Is everything OK in Hostage World?

  126. mare spiked everyone’s drinks with gluten this weekend, Teresa.

    *shakes fists at sky*

    MAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUTEN!!!!

  127. That whore.

  128. So FedEx will get back to me within 48 hours. This for a delivery to a town with a population of 900, 30 or 40 streets……………….

  129. Since no one asked, we finished up our softball season in 3rd place, our best ranking ever. (We were on our way to a great season last year, but I got hurt and the team lost the 4 games that I missed.)

    We crushed the other team yesterday. We scored 5 runs in the top of the 1st inning, they got up and scored 2runs, before we shut them down with a triple play. We then scored 12 runs in the second inning, batting around before we made our first out.

    Final score (after 4 innings): 23-5.

    I give the guys on our team a lot of credit. After being on the receiving end of that kind of whooping, we started taking it easy and stopped cheering.

    Other team seemed to appreciate that.

  130. Sorry Wiser, that was mean. Here, let me make it up to you.

    (Metallica did an album of cover songs.)

  131. Heh. Wiser’s team played the team from Gaza.

  132. >> Since no one asked, we finished up our softball season in 3rd place, our best ranking ever

    I was gonna ask.

  133. Comment by wiserbud on July 14, 2014 5:39 pm
    Since no one asked, we finished up our softball season in 3rd place, our best ranking ever. (We were on our way to a great season last year, but I got hurt and the team lost the 4 games that I missed.)
    We crushed the other team yesterday. We scored 5 runs in the top of the 1st inning, they got up and scored 2runs, before we shut them down with a triple play. We then scored 12 runs in the second inning, batting around before we made our first out.
    Final score (after 4 innings): 23-5.
    I give the guys on our team a lot of credit. After being on the receiving end of that kind of whooping, we started taking it easy and stopped cheering.
    Other team seemed to appreciate that.

    Number of beers consumed?

    A) you
    2) team

  134. Boy, I really had to dig into that Kickstarter page to figure out WTF was going on there.
    What a racket.

  135. Have you been doing your Kegels, chumpo?

  136. I got 3 hours of sleep last night, what do I win?

  137. You win a free Kegel trainer. Leon gets first runner up at 4 hours.

  138. Aren’t Kegals a crackfat thing?

  139. >> I got 3 hours of sleep last night, what do I win?

    A TACKLEHUG! *smoosh*

  140. Trust me, no one else wants to do Chumpo’s kegels.

  141. Hugs and Prayers Romacita.

  142. Tacklehugs are good.

    Mr. RFH didn’t sleep at all, so I’ll give the Kegel thingy to him.

    Heard him framming around at 4 AM, argued with him for half an hour, won, and took him to the ER. This time they did a CT. It’s not a good thing when the doc says out loud that he’s impressed. Abscess drained, morphine, Atavan (sp?) and clindamycin given, Mr. RFH back home with some homemade chicken and rice soup.

    I was tired enough to fall asleep in the ER on two chairs pushed together and my purse for a pillow.

  143. Do you mean Ativan? That’s an anti-anxiety drug.

  144. Ativan was for Roamie.

  145. take the tonsils. They ain’t worth this kinda grief.

    Dave in Texas. Tonsil free since 1979. Also pretty much strep free since then.

  146. Yes, Ativan. They did the surgery with a local. I think the local anesthetic itself hurt as just as bad.

  147. Oh gee, I hope things get more better soon, Roamy.

  148. Did anybody tell anybody else that they hadn’t yet proved they were responsible enough to take care of a puppy today?

  149. Shit. We forgot to feed Pupster again, didn’t we?

  150. >> Did anybody tell anybody else that they hadn’t yet proved they were responsible enough to take care of a puppy today?

    HAHAHAHA..

    One of the many things about my youngest kid that makes me proud as she be’s an adult, she took on that little waif last summer. She lives on her own and earns her own money and pays her way. She does the vet bills, buys the dog food. Dealt with a puppy in the pup’s baby days.

    I just get to play with the dog. I don’t take care of the dog, my kid does that.

    She also has a bond with that dog that is amazing and sweet to watch.

  151. This is how fucked up the youth of America is: Men commonly talk of doing Kegels to enhance their endurance on Reddit.

    My guess is that in the next few years these slow witted, feminine men will be talking about their vaginas.

    “Gee Karl, I really like the girl that’s dating me but I have a hard time keeping my vagina hard when we attempt heteronormative sex.”

  152. What’s going on with Mr. RFH, Roamy?

    I’m with Dave – 6 months after DD#3 was born (and 6 episodes of strep throat later), I had my tonsils out, too.

    Haven’t had strep throat since.

  153. If you have your tonsils removed do you have a gag reflex? I’m scheduling surgery for GND pretty sure that’s just silly.

  154. TiFW, this is the same problem he’s had for most of the last week. Unable to eat or swallow. Negative for strep.

  155. “Gee Karl, I really like the girl that’s dating me but I have a hard time keeping my vagina hard when we attempt heteronormative sex.”

    Poor Karl. Always in the Friend Zone.

  156. Good night, fools. I’ve only got 50 pages or so left in The Count of Monte Cristo and I’m pretty sure they shoot the dog in the end.

  157. Poor thing! The tonsils still might need to come out; the ENT took one look at mine and told me they could come out then, or I could just wait it out, but at some point they were going to have to be taken out – they were completely shot.

    I was sick and tired of being sick and tired – I had already missed six months of DD#3’s 1st year.

  158. Hope Mr RFH gets better.

  159. The Count of Monte Cristo is one of the best graphic novels EVER!!!

  160. If you have your tonsils removed do you have a gag reflex?

    Dunno about that, but I could hit a high “C” after they came out :-)

  161. MaryAnn had a soft tissue abscess. I’ve never seen Mr Roamy in the same room as MA. *narrows eyes*

  162. The ENT doc said that since Mr. RFH has no prior history of tonsil trouble, that a tonsillectomy was not necessary now but would be if this happened again.

  163. * looks for a kagel doing instruction video online*

    What the crap! I can’t do those!!

  164. James Caviezel is hawt as the Count of Monte Cristo.

  165. OH ok new info. I had tonsil trouble for years before the cut em out.

    No surgery unless required.

  166. I got an extra set of tonsils put in a few years back. Just to treat myself.

  167. I used Benzalkonium Chloride (Bactine) on sore throats that have defied the experts on several occasions. Tastes like shit but it takes on the creepy crud like nothing else going. plus it’s got lidocane (again, not rally approved for internal applications but i feel like the throat is still in the grey area) which beats the hell out of cloraseptic and lasts longer. My 2cents.

  168. *gets back to work on may kagles with a bactine chaser*

    Hope yer fella feels better Roamy. get some rest.

  169. I am glad the mystery has been solved RFH.

  170. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iFEQ_QWDwMc

  171. I’m still wrapping my brain around morphine for an abscess in your throat, having had morphine for 18 hours after a joint replacement.

    That is one fucked up abscess. Glad he’s gettin better

  172. I’m glad you won that argument Roamy; speedy healing to Mr. RFH.

  173. Cyn, I feel all hollow inside without a project.

  174. I would like to wrap my brain around some morphine.

  175. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CMMV18bRX5I

  176. Oh, I’ll give you a project.

  177. yeah that shit was pretty good. I sure understand why people can get hooked on it.

    3/3d is forward deployed now. Prayers and kind thoughts welcome.

  178. On the way Dave.

  179. Chumpo – check your male/mail pour favour

  180. copy.

    No worries, DiT. They are the best in the Biz.

  181. Are the TITS shirts for sale yet?

  182. Thanks.

    As mentioned, thank God he knows what the fuck he’s doing over there. Not a rookie.

  183. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CMMV18bRX5I

    D’awwwww

  184. “check your male/mail pour favour”

    Ewwww

  185. Soon Xbrad, like probably before the week is over. And they look fanfuckingtastic.

  186. I swear, Scoot, I look at your avatard and see that right hand all perky and UP, just off left of the picture. Damn those were funny commercials.

  187. Prayers, DiT. Do yourself a favor and don’t follow on Social Media.

  188. That was one of the funniest ad campaigns ever.

  189. Have Roamy and Pupster met? If so, did Pupster instinctively raise his hind leg?

  190. Finally got the package FedEx lost. Somebody found it on their porch when they got home tonight and brought it by my in-laws. Small towns……..

  191. Small towns… honest folks.

  192. At this point even though there are public things OPSEC.

    So from here on out, puppy pics

  193. Love Fedex here, too. They leave stuff at the door, and don’t even knock. They say they do, but my wife usually sits about 8 feet from the door, and she’s got really good hearing.

    She didn’t attend the concerts I did.

  194. I think I had tonsils out in ’53. The last thing I remembered was what looked like a kitchen-strainer with a cloth over it that smelled like ether being put over my face.
    Then, I woke-up in a bed and had ice-cream!
    After that, I went to stay with grammy and got mumps, measles, and chickenpox at the same time.
    Being 5 was cool!

  195. Thinking of you and yours, Dave. My cousin was there, too. He didn’t like it much.

  196. Was it FedEx Ground?

    They get paid a very small amount per stop.

    How far are you from the road?

  197. I H8 having to get dressed for FedEx, UPS, or whoever.

  198. Road? LOLOLOLOL

  199. thanks Jay.

    270 days or so, counting.

  200. Not so much honest folks in town, just got lucky. :) Lucky they didn’t leave it at one of the meth places.

  201. We have stuff delivered to my in-laws in town. They are right on a major street. UPS knows us, I’ve gotten stuff delivered by them that had only my name and the town on it, no street address. FedEx has left stuff at a 4 year vacant house on the next block, luckily the neighbors saw the truck leave it there and picked it up.

  202. That’s insane Pepe; those drivers should be reported. I get that they don’t make a ton of money, but c’mon man.

  203. UPS drivers are paid by the hour.

    FedEx Ground guys get paid by the stop.

  204. AYFKM??? People have been stealing Goodwill donations for years, but now it’s an issue?

  205. I think you said your driveway is a couple of miles, only a moron would drive that for a buck or two.

  206. Or somebody whose job it was.

  207. Jay is funny.

  208. Fedex and UPS leave the package out of view on my fenced in porch. USPS leaves it at the office, that waits 4 days before leaving me a note that *we have a package for you * (yeah!) and will return it after 5 days if you do not pick it up. (?!?!, Bastages!)

  209. FedEx Ground drivers that are stupid enough to deliver to Pepe’s house have all gone out of business.

    The one’s that throw his packages out the window and scan them as delivered? Still in business.

  210. Tomorrow is my last day of work this week. I head back to Tampa on Wed. Rented a 2014 Corvette.

  211. Coupe because I am cheap the convertible was $50 a day more.

    I am renting a Camaro SS for Tempe. Cyn and I are doing burn outs when sober.I will show Carin 50 reasons not to drive a Prius.

  212. What really sucks is I know the drivers to my quadrant because of 20+ years in retail. Good guys. The FedEx driver’s Dad is the deacon at my church. Still get shitty delivery.

  213. I threw my package out there quite a bit, and I’m out of business.

  214. Step on it, Vman!

  215. *Tapes a Franklin to the glove box*. It is Cyns if she can reach it before I hit 100!

  216. Lorena Bobbitt got famous for throwing a package out of a window.

  217. Have I ever mentioned how much I H8 the A’s?

  218. I worked at a UPS place in Denton Texas when I was in college in 1979.

    Christmas plus up.

  219. Fuck the A’s. And the Raiders. And Oakland in general.

  220. Oso loves Sean!!!!

  221. The only good thing Oakland ever did, as far as I’m concerned, was discharge me from the Army.

  222. I pretty much hated flyin in and out of Oakland.

    But when a flight home was cancelled.. that was the worst.

    I’m lookin at you Oakland Airport Holiday Inn

  223. I actually liked flying in and out of Oakland. Much more convenient than SFO. Then again, I always had an actual residence to go to from there.

  224. the con v of Oakland was fine.. I hate SFO

  225. I flew from SFO to OAK once.

  226. Or OAK to SFO. Can’t quite remember which.

  227. Why X?

  228. My Dad was spit on by hippies at SFO after his last stint in VN. There was no timely reporting so it was anecdotal and didn’t happen.

  229. TG, UAL used to fly that route a couple times a day to reposition planes for future operations. I was heading from Oakland Army Depot to Seattle. I guess the cheapest route was to fly me from OAK to SFO, where I took an Alaska flight to SEA.

    I didn’t book it. SATO did (Scheduled Airline Ticket Office provides travel itineraries and tickets to soldiers traveling on orders).

  230. Actual logic involved, military doing things right!

  231. My Dad loved SF. Hippies broke his heart. I have great stories from SF. Major meltdown of my Dad in Chinatown when I refused to eat seafood. Our waiter was so cool. Late 60s.

  232. new Release Tuesday. Rio 2. Good night.

  233. Getting ready to snuggle with Dan…turning off fans…

  234. When I walked through the door my wife she lay upon the floor
    And with tears her eyes were sore I did not know why
    Then I looked into her hand and I saw the telegram
    Said that I was a derp, derp man but that I was dead

  235. Awake much too soon.

  236. Watching Mountain Men on Amazon Prime.

    HDTV is really stunning when you don’t see it much. I’m only used to this for watching sports at a friend’s house.

  237. G’morning. Busy day again. Hip then a spine then on call again.

    *praying for rain to keep the kids indoors*

  238. Office Eviction Watch: Day 1.

  239. Wakey.

  240. That sounds like it could be a reality show Leon. Sorry this is happening with your work. Every couple of years the admin sends out spreadsheets of revenue vs expenses with the implied message of “Cut more people open”. The data gets crunched regularly but the thinly veiled threats seem to be on a 2-3 year cycle.

  241. The case I’m doing is being delayed by one factor out of anyone’s control and another that was entirely predictable. The unpredictable one is providing cover for the predictable screw up. If that makes any sense. The end result is I’ll be late to my next case where I’m assisting my partner on a spine. Dammit.

  242. Eh, it’s not the worst thing in the world, and it was one of the possible scenarios when I did the internal job change. I just never thought it would be so soon. I figured it would come in 2016 due to the lease on the building, and it would just be closure.

    My soon-to-be-former coworkers are mostly happy with the situation. It’s just me and one other guy losing an office, and neither of us strictly needs the ones we have. Biggest impacts to me:

    1) No reason to leave the house anymore.
    2) No reason to wear anything but shorts and a t-shirt anymore.
    3) The gym — right next to my office — is now a special commute.
    4) I have to bring home my work library and find places for it.
    5) I have to make my home office more of an office.
    6) Probably going to have to travel more frequently.
    7) I now have to do my own travel crap.
    8) I won’t be close to people very often during the day.

  243. On the upside, no one’s breaking into this house during the day ever. Or stealing delivered packages off the porch.

    Home office is at home, and so is the arsenal.

  244. My husband would love to work from home but I’d probably kill him after a few weeks of that.

  245. My wife likes working from home, but does miss not seeing people all the time. She gets a little cabin fever once in a while.

    At this point, I think I’d rather have some space from most of the people I work with. I still like coming in to the office, though.

  246. We need a gnu post.

  247. My wife and I will probably trade cars and I’ll swap out her SUV for a pickup. Not like I need to get all those MPGs.

  248. I can’t do a gnu post, I’m at work!

    *looks over to couch and other computer*

    At work, I say!

  249. Here are some topics:

    Hillary’s Spanxsuit
    Fish Stick recipes

  250. Morning, children. My “office” is about 100 feet away from the house.

  251. The mental image of people helping Hillary into a Spanxsuit is horrifying.

  252. I picture it being a little like the suit-up scene from Iron Man but revolting.

  253. gimmerm

  254. I can’t work from home, there are too many distractions.

    And by distractions I mean I can’t get out of “Dad” mode long enough to get into “Work” mode.

    Before the in-laws moved in, I had a man cave like basement with an office setup, but now I’ve got a small desk in the master bedroom or I can share office space with boy1 and 2’s home-school classroom.

    First World Problems.

  255. It’s not that, it’s an exoskeleton covered with a pant suit.

  256. I laughed at the back-to-school sale that included women’s lounge pants.

  257. *closes closet door*

  258. Load ’em up on the bus, then kick back!

    Oooh, just realized Rocketboy will still be here for Mini-me’s first week of school, so I can get him to pick her up for all the 1:00 dismissals.

  259. What a coincidence. There was a fish stick recipe in my inbox this morning.

  260. How is Mr. Hydrant today?

  261. Laura, he’s still sleeping. (And yeah, I checked to make sure he was still breathing.) I made some vegetable beef soup for him. Will leave instructions for the kids before I leave for worky worky.

  262. Working from home is a good idea in theory, bad in practise. I get distracted. The guy who mows the lawn has a broken silencer, the refrigerator beckons.
    And I need people nearby, even if I am not interacting with them.
    Being alone for 8 hours feels vaguely post apocalyptic

  263. And is there any leftover morphine?

  264. Yeah, I’m thinking if this is permanent, I’ll have to schedule in some people time every day. I’d do daily mass, but I have a meeting that conflicts with it at the moment.

  265. Hmm, I do much better when I don’t have to deal with people. You degenerates are 90% of my social interaction. I can go a month without talking to anybody.

  266. I love working at home. Looking forward to getting a new load of work today.

  267. Ok, I’ve avoided it long enough. Kitchen is clean. House picked up . Laundry room confronted .

    I have to go weed the veggie garden.

    Avenge me if I never return .

  268. Nu post.

  269. Hmm, I do much better when I don’t have to deal with people. You degenerates are 90% of my social interaction. I can go a month without talking to anybody.
    ————————
    *gives Pepe the nod


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