HA! You wish.



  1. Winner, winner, chicken dinner.

  2. >> I would hate to see anything happen to it.

    Hey ya dork. Tell my girlfriend I said hi. Also I miss your stupid face and I want to punch you. Date and time.

  3. Is Cyn the only person that poats here anymore?

    We should give her a raise.

  4. I do so many holes I ain’t got time for golf.

  5. I could use a good raise.

  6. Only 18? He needs to cut out the coke off off dead hooker’s asses.

  7. I got out of bed at the crack of 10 for this?

  8. Rosie, I poat every Monday and have for the past 123 weeks.

  9. And I only borrow other people’s crap when I don’t have just the right shade for the masterpiece that I’m currently working on. I call it “A Study In Brown”. It’s an ongoing work.

  10. Dave, why don’t you come over here and say that.

    *pulls out nunchucks*

  11. Leon
    You crossed the 1000 tranny mark last week

  12. Look at me linking shit like a BOSS!!!

  13. Sean,
    It just occurred to me(D’oh!) that something in Sean-Moms X-Ray must have been pretty bad, that they would schedule surgery on a Sunday morning in the middle of a three-day weekend.
    She should request a copy.
    She paid for them, after all.
    I wonder what they’re not telling…

    Anitas were pretty interesting.

  14. I’m leaving for a massage* and this place had better be cleaned up by the time I get back!

    (*not a euphemism)

  15. Look at me linking shit like a BOSS!!!

    Until you start in with hashtag selfies featuring a resting bitchface as good as the First Lady’s, I ain’t impressed.

  16. 7th chakra?

  17. Rosie, I poat every Monday and have for the past 123 weeks.

    That’s like bragging that you have full blown AIDS.

    You shouldn’t put that on your resume’.

  18. Here Rosie:

  19. Cyn?

  20. Shit. Let’s try that again.



  21. Mmmmmm…….tits.

  22. That’s like bragging that you have full blown AIDS.

    Watching you do it convinced me it was a good idea.

  23. I haven’t posted here in a year. I’m putting that on my resume.

  24. The word “boobs” is better than the word “tits” in my humble but factually correct opinion.

    “Boobs” sounds like something fun that should be enjoyed and played with. “Tits” sounds likes something you find on a hooker or a porn star.


  25. Watching you do it convinced me it was a good idea.

    I’m disgusted by your lack of good judgement.

  26. This is a serious question for someone else with an iPad.

    How the fuck do you italicize a comment that you copy and paste?

  27. Does anyone else want to punch Jillian Michaels in the face?

  28. Now what should we talk about?

  29. I wonder what percentage of men have had sex with a hooker.

    Do you think that percentage is higher or lower than the gay population?


  30. I like tits… boobs is just what we say in polite conversation. Homo.

  31. Rachel Maddow seems like she might be a lesbian.


  32. Daveintexas seems like he might be a giant douche bag.


  33. Please tell your mom to stop calling me in the middle of the night and hanging up.


  34. We should talk about the lack of Henry and Floyd pictures.

  35. Quick update: Mom got out of surgery a little while ago and is in recovery right now. The doc said it went well. Thank you all for your prayers and concern.

  36. Company. Great.

    *Puts on shirt.*

  37. I am a giant douchebag with hair.

    Hey Sean, I’m glad it went well. You doing ok?

  38. How many fingers and toes can beasn stick up a guinea pig’s butt at one time?


  39. That’s great news Sean.

    Get well soon Mom Cassidy.

  40. Is it possible for Jewstin to own a negative number of shirts?


  41. I wonder what percentage of men have had sex with a hooker.

    Depends on your def of hooker. A woman who fucks on the first date because the meal and cocktails agreed with her might be a hooker.

    Except for mare.

  42. Is Henry in the infinite questions stage? That shit can be annoying.

  43. No pendejo, that’s a slut not a hooker.

    Everybody loves sluts. Not everybody loves hookers.

  44. My buddy went to Vegas for the first time and talked about getting a hooker. I told him he can’t afford one without teeth.

  45. Rosie, saw you at the zoo this past week. You’ve been working out.


  46. So ronery…


  47. Henry is not in the questioning or the why phase yet.

    He’s in the phase where he looks at me and says “NO!” for no reason other than he knows it pisses me off.

    He and I argue about nothing because he’s almost 3 years old and I’m a fucking genius.

  48. Hahaha. Poor gorilla.

  49. Hopefully he never tires of throwing things at your head.

  50. Rosetta, I have a neighbor with two pig dogs. They will come charging like hippos from the backyard to the front, to get some pets.
    Poor things, if they get caught out in the rain, they will drown because of the position of their snout.

  51. Gorillas are pretty much all hung like Rosetta. Humans have the largest penis on any primate. Because human females are sometimes hookers.

  52. Leon
    You could start a new gorilla penis poat on Monday to supplement the tucker photos

  53. Gorillas are pretty much all hung like Rosetta. Humans have the largest penis on any primate. Because human females are sometimes hookers.

    A > B: B(n) > A(n): H < C

    Math blog.

  54. Hooker math is hard

  55. My dad’s favorite joke was about a gorilla.

    He told it better than anybody

  56. 2nd beer

  57. Hotbride is complaining about people mowing their lawns on Sunday. She said in Britain they have a disturbing the peace ordinance.

    I told her in America we have freedom.

  58. Any day after 8-830 is fair game for mowing

  59. Texas Crutch applied.

  60. Paula looked worried when I told her I was wrapping my meat in a crutch.

  61. let lawnmowers ring.

    It just occurred to me that a kid who has a Purple Heart gripped my hand and called me sir a few weeks ago, out of respect for my daughter.

    It seems back assward. But I appreciated it. It’s not like I can intimidate him much.

  62. Observations:

    On the way to mom and dad’s, I have observed 0 Democrat campaign signs. We are 2 weeks out from a primary.


  63. On the way to a twelve person backyard BBQ. Let wine glasses ring.

  64. Hello Meat Wrappers,

    I am sooo freaking relaxed… did someone say wine?!

  65. wine is fine

  66. That last comment was so tiring that I slept for 2 hours afterward.

  67. It’s too hot to go running. It’s too hot to garden.


  68. My kids had a blast at the adventure park. They *won’t * shut up about it.

  69. *Sends Carin’s kids a selection of kazoos*

  70. It’s always too hot to go running. Even in the Arctic.

    Running is a brain stem response to being chased by a saber toothed tiger. It’s not something you’re supposed to do voluntarily.

    Said the fat lazy man.

  71. You people can all start sucking dicks. And by you people, I mean you people.

  72. MJ, you have to change your avatar. Please.

  73. Or at least change your name to bertinernie.

  74. I’ve seen that pic before but never noticed Bert’s tongue… hahahahaha!

    *runs to a corner, gathers up into fetal position, rocks back and forth pondering the realities of my childhood*

  75. Cyn…so innocent in the ways of muppet porn.

  76. How’s the cake, Rosie?

  77. The icing feels so good when it touches my nipples!

  78. This blog is like the loser friend you hang out with because you don’t have any cool friends.


  79. Xmen was pretty good. They didn’t explain how Xavier returned from oblivion, I must have missed that comic. *shrugs*

    You people can all start sucking dicks.

  80. Time travel bullshit, Pupster. It’s always time travel bullshit.

    I HATE time travel. Only been done correctly once, IMO.

  81. No, twice. Gargoyles (yes, the kid’s cartoon), and Somewhere in Time.

  82. Back from niece’s party.

    Brownies made. Turkey cooking.

  83. “time travel”


  84. Wow Rosetta, you’ve been around most of the day. You on a trip?

  85. I am making broccoli slaw for tomorrow.

  86. Just talked to my mom. She’s resting more or less comfortably, was able to eat earlier, and is doing pretty well. I’ll be able to go see her tomorrow morning after my regular meeting. Oh, and I saw dave ask earlier if I’m doing okay, so I’ll leave this here:


  87. How’s the brisket?

  88. Good job, Sean and Sean mom.

  89. Good afternoon. Jimbro, please send brisket – I’m about to put frozen fish sticks in the oven. Have pity.

    It just occurred to me(D’oh!) that something in Sean-Moms X-Ray must have been pretty bad, that they would schedule surgery on a Sunday morning in the middle of a three-day weekend.
    She should request a copy.
    She paid for them, after all.

    Please do that. Otherwise you will have no access to it because they will only give it to doctors. If they do. For the past year, one hospital would not release an MRI or even just the notes to my new neurologist, and it was critical that he have it to compare to others. It fucked everything up.

    I want Henry to throw grenades at that building.

  90. Sean, glad to hear your mom is doing reasonably well.

  91. Discuss.
    I don’t get it.


  92. 2 hours with the crutch, now resting in a cooler. Brisket in one hour.

  93. Back from niece’s party.
    Brownies made. Turkey cooking.
    Sounds good.


  94. The boy just left to spend some time with his friends at the lake. Penelope told me “That means you can scream all you want tonight.”

    Can’t decide whether to be more nervous, or more excited. Probably ought to check her internet history. ;)

  95. Can’t decide whether to be more nervous, or more excited.

    See MJ’s gif.

  96. Sean, all you need to know about total hip dislocation:


  97. Yep, leaning toward nervous.

  98. >>See MJ’s gif.

    AHAHAHA. How many of you involuntarily puckered while watching that?

  99. Can’t decide whether to be more nervous, or more excited. Probably ought to check her internet history. ;)

  100. I think you are going to wish you bought a 15 lb brisket.

  101. Pepe’s getting foomped tonight.

  102. MJ should ask Rosetta how to link stuff.

  103. That would be a good conversation.

  104. 1,000 days! Many congratulations, Sean.

  105. well that was a nap too far.. shit. I thought it was tomorrow.

  106. Shawn I’m glad your mom is resting well and I have a good reason to remember Aug 29

  107. I quit napping decades ago. Only 1 in 5 would actually help me.

  108. yeah I think this one was like that..

  109. I bet I could nap well if I had pot.

  110. One time I woke up after a bad nap with my head on backwards, and went to get some groceries. I bought a couple pounds of salt and a big box of matches, and a bunch of other stuff that people cannot actually eat. Came home and was unpacking the bags, just thinking, wtf am I gonna have for dinner tonight?

  111. I take a nap every day before I go into work. It helps decrease the urge to strangle people.

    Thank you to all of you nice people. You’re too kind. No, I mean it, you’re a little too kind.

    *looks over shoulder to see if foomp is coming*

  112. At least I didn’t take a shower and get dressed for work, I knew it was Memorial Day except it wasn’t.

    *eats some paste and shakes off the logy head*

  113. they’re nice, I’m a jerk

  114. Most of my naps are good. Today’s was not.

  115. you’re feelin me leon.. ugh..

  116. Yup. I hate it when you don’t know if it’s AM or PM.

  117. Perhaps you are both attuned to some impending calamity which is harshing your mellow.

    *consults I Ching*

  118. perhaps Sheawn.. perhaps.

  119. I really need a nap RIGHT NOW, but it’s too late.

  120. Ugh. One more day of obamerjerb tomorrow. Soles of my feet have already taken a beating this weekend. Feels like walking on bruises.



    lw hot water and stuff.. for standing on concrete all day

  122. haha, Karzai refused to meet with Obama. Putin must be laughing his head off.

    Barry: “People are picking on me for that stupid, nothingburger VA so-called scandal. Make them stop!”

    Jarrett: “Do a surprise trip to Afghanistan and we’ll get photos of you with the troops. They will be ordered to look happy to see you, or else.”

    Barry: “But I have tee times on Saturday, Sunday and Monday! Seriously, do I have to?”

    Jarrett: “Yes, you ungrateful, lazy, sniveling, good-for-nothing, do it!”

    Barry: *sniffs noisily*
    *wipes nose on sleeve*
    *shuffles feet as he leaves the room*

  123. Hot water? Are you sure? I feel like my feet are baking already.

  124. Yeah, I would have thought cold too. David??

  125. Epson Salts?

  126. I’m just not gonna worry about it, and deal. I can rest the next morning, and go buy some new shoes and insoles for work.

  127. Well, crap. Sorry you’re hurting, hon.

  128. heat is best for achy feets unless a truck drove over them

  129. Epsom salts are great for muscle aches. For real. When I make a list of suggestions for dealing with aches and pains not caused by anything serious I always include Epsom salts. The kids have no idea what they are but the parents know. If the grandparents are there they always nod appreciatively at the mention.

    “Dang fool doctor charged $200 for advice I’ve been giving you all along!”

  130. How do Epson salts work, Jimbro?

  131. I think it’s the magnesium easing sore muscles. I also recommend them when patients soak open wounds or smashed fingers.

  132. Crap. Epsom.

  133. They don’t. It’s a scam perpetuated by Big Epsom.

  134. Big Brisket owns me now.

  135. I find it amazing there’s no “foot” point on the reflexology chart:

  136. Was it tender and juicy, Jimbro?

  137. How was dinner?

  138. yeah.. I meant with those salts. helped my tootsies feel better after a full day on the trade show floor

  139. It was both tender and juicy. I poured some beer into the crutch since I had no beef both or apple juice. That loosened up the bark a little bit but not bad…next time less liquid and time in the crutch. I’m glad I started small with a 5 pound cut. I learned some things that’ll be handy for next time.

  140. Don’t fall in love with ‘bark,’ man. Bark is just dry meat.

  141. are you talking about surgery? cause that’s gross

  142. Did anybody change the safe word without telling anybody else today?

  143. Surgery is fun Dave! Well, doing surgery is fun. Never fun when it’s you getting the knife.

  144. *claps Dave into a large clear plastic merchandise container marked ‘Live Plants’ and marks him down 50%*

    He will be gone within the hour.


    minor surgery means it’s happening to somebody not me. I’m glad you fix people doctah. That has to be fulfilling.

    *struggles against the ether*

  146. Some of my first patients were Norwegian rats in Nancy Bucher’s lab.


    They too struggled vainly against the effects of ether.

  147. Surgery is so 80’s.

  148. Oopsie!


  149. Sean,
    Another example of the clown-show that is the Uh-Bama administration.
    These folks are pathetic…

  150. Sean, congrats on the 1K Days, glad your Mom is comfortable and you get to see her tomorrow.

  151. Oh, no, Crispy. I believe that they observe extremely scrupulous internet hygiene, when it regards one of their own.

    This bullshit is how they are cleansing the international agencies of the previous era’s burrowed-in leftovers, because they can’t actually fire them.

  152. aaaand goodnight shmooples.

  153. Between call outs, walk offs, and scheduling issues, there were no lift drivers scheduled today. Dan was asked to come in and drive. I was spotting. The other spotter was only scheduled until 2pm. A Member overheard me talking to the other spotter about calling Electronics Associates out by name. Turns out the Member is an AA GOPer State Legislator. We had a long conversation about D-rats and Minimum Wage Legislation.

  154. Sean, the article raised the old canard about Plame’s “Outing”. I lost all respect for Tim Russert when he lied about what the neighbors knew about Plame/Wilson.

  155. Of course the “Surprise Afghanistan Visit” is no “surprise” to the USAF.
    Phat has talked about the giant “Goat Fuck™” that happens at Airlift Command to move the SCOAMF
    I’m sure that all of those young service-men and women, that were ordered to be his audience, are very reassured that his administration is doing everything possible to un-fuck the VA (which he ran of “fixing” in 2007) before they ETS and are dependent on it for services…
    Our tax dollars at work.

  156. The Post’s attempt at equivalence doesn’t even make any damn sense:

    The disclosure marked a rare instance in which a CIA officer working overseas had his cover — the secrecy meant to protect his actual identity — pierced by his own government. The only other recent case came under significantly different circumstances, when former CIA operative Valerie Plame was exposed as officials of the George W. Bush administration sought to discredit her husband, a former ambassador and fierce critic of the decision to invade Iraq.

    I know Valerie was a sooper-sekrit double-naught spy while she was working and all, but she was working in fucking Virginia when Richard “Not to be Confused With Scooter Libby” Armitage blabbed to Robert Novak about her. FFS.

  157. Sean,
    Did you see my comment about getting a copy of the X-rays?
    All Anita had to do was go to the front-desk at radiology, ask for them, and wait for them to burn the CD.
    You should really do it.
    If Sean-Dad is feeling litigious, they could be VERY helpful.
    Just sayin’…

  158. Everyone in the neighborhood, which included the Russert family, knew that Plame was CIA, because her hubby made a point of bragging about her job.

  159. Living overseas, if you paid attention, you knew whose Dads/Moms were CIA. I even knew 2 Dads that were “Wet workers”. (Both were born in Eastern Europe and emigrated to the US as children)

  160. Have you thrown anything yet, Oso?

  161. Thanks, Crispy. I don’t think she’s had any problems with obtaining copies of her X-rays in the past, but we’ll see.

  162. my doctor is going to give me another supreme ration of shit this week., Why in the hell can’t I remember sunscreen in May?

  163. howdy Sean and all. *tips hat to Oso*
    I offered burnt cow to the fire gods tonight and it was tasty.

    Yesterday Blake visited a potential forever family. He managed to get into a fight with a rottweiler at the dog bark and rip the leash out of the hands of both under 10 year old daughters while chasing squirrels.

    I think he wants to stay with me.

  164. Blake knows you’re a good guy, Vman. Smart dog.

  165. bacon wrapped filet, baked tater, and green salad.

  166. I’m watching hockey with a Cards fan. On my third bourbon. After 2pm, we were having to grab any associate to spot. I can’t handle Reds baseball right now. Stupid meteor game earlier AND the Doyers throw a No-No.

  167. Blake wants to stay with you.

  168. Sean,
    The copy Anita got this time was great!
    The display software was on the CD.
    Light it up and see the X-Rays! Very cool!

  169. Blake is a great dog and will make someone a fantastic pet. He sure has bonded with me though

  170. Blake wants to be part of Vmaxs pack…

  171. I’m kinda liking this Reds-Cards game, for some reason.

  172. I had crappy mexican food tonight, and you guys talk about brisket?

  173. Jay,
    We’re gonna have re-heated pizza from last-night.
    A 16″ five cheese, with quartered artichoke-hearts, black olives, Roma tomatoes, covered with Messican 4-cheese blend.
    Those artichoke-hearts will make you regular, just sayin’…

  174. ribeye over lump charcoal Jay

  175. FACK!!! Rangers just won. The piss in the cup and throw it on the peeps in the $$$ seats Rangers. Not the “Moved into the Metroplex and made a lot of friends” Rangers.

  176. *smacks Sean upside the kidney*

    Get the copies of the X-rays! Upthread I told you about how a hospital that shall not be named (Hoag) refuses to give two of my doctors copies of my MRI. Now is the only time you have the chance to get them. Afterwards it is only to doctors, if they fucking feel like it!

    I know where you live (California) and I will find you and TP your house if you do not do this.

  177. It is strange, I have broken all of my shot glasses this week.

  178. Any one else read Lippy’s comment as Liam Neeson?

  179. Blake is my middle name. That should cinch it

    well ok Blakely

  180. Lipstick,
    While Anita was still in “ER5”, and no doctors were in defensive-mode, getting a copy of the X-Rays was easy.

    It MAY not matter, but if it does, this will be IMPORTANT!

    Do it, Sean…

  181. Pizza and ribeye, mmmm.

  182. Foomp, there it is. Foomp, there it is.


  183. Why do the videos I link not play automatically?

    “Because you’re an idiot” is not the type of help I’m looking for, asshole.

  184. Yeah J’ames, I sympathize — I had frozen fish sticks.

    What restaurants serve brisket?

  185. My Dad had a hemorrhagic stroke. He walked into the hospital. He was treated for a regular stroke. Left paralyzed. From the waist down. All his records were “Lost”. RL friend’s Mom had a stroke in Ruidoso. 3 months later. Instead of taking her to Roswell, she was airlifted to ABQ, because of the “Porter” situation that was still being investigated. Full recovery. My Dad, not so much. My Mom, refused to follow up and engage a lawyer.

  186. Oh, wait, you had ribeye? So I am the biggest loser?

  187. Lippy, nope. We’re getting ready to eat a Jack’s frozen pizza from Sam’s Club.

  188. “Because you’re an idiot” is not the type of help I’m looking for, asshole.

    It’s the only kind I can give.

    Also you’re posting the mobile link for some reason.

  189. our Rosie smash and grab comment.

  190. Congrats on 1000 days, Sean!!!!! {hugs}

  191. I am faced with the annual quandary, as Memorial Day is once again on Monday (funny, that). I am going to do my usual poat, but anyone sufficiently motivated to supplant it with something appropriate to the day of remembrance should feel welcome.

    But keep in mind that my lovely bride is deployed to a dangerous war zone (i.e. Maine) for TWO WHOLE WEEKS, so it’s not like I’m not sacrificing myself here.

  192. Lippy likes fish sticks? What, is she some kind of a gay fish? Cartman’d/Kanye’d (Really doesn’t make sense due to Lippy being a chick)

  193. What does “posting the mobile link” mean?

    Please respond monosyllabically as I don’t understand technology beyond “hardware you can hit with a hammer; software you can only cuss at.”

  194. DiT is keeping it real at the HQ. I think you should run with the trannies here.

  195. I haven’t eaten a fish stick in 25 years. It hasn’t been long enough yet.

  196. Oso, J’ames said ‘pizza and ribeye’ after me thinking we were sympatico with having crappy food today.

    That is terrible what they did to your dad and then covered up.

  197. You poated this: http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Z-FPimCmbX8
    I would have poated this:http://youtu.be/Z-FPimCmbX8

  198. Eating left-over pizza.

  199. Correction, I’d have poated this: http://youtu.be/xdCp_j8Wyuw

  200. Lippy, it got worse. LOL

  201. Well how do I do that?

    I’m starting to hate Apple. This iPad is as user-friendly as the CERN large hadron collider.

    Fuck you particle physics!

  202. >> “Because you’re an idiot” is not the type of help I’m looking for, asshole.

    What other kind of help are you open to?

  203. Am I the only one who still always sees it as the Large Hardon

    /latent homosexual

  204. *raises hand sheepishly to agree with Shawn*

  205. I’m so user illiterate, I let Cyn do everything. When we had our Meat-up, she was going to show me how to post, but we had problems. I’m too lazy to try to fix. In the mean time, Earworm Thorsday’s is not a thing.

  206. Also, congrats on the 1K days, you dirty motherfucker. Hugs!!

  207. The kind of help where your mom blows a gorilla and then tells me how to work this piece of shit.

    I love how you buy anything from Apple and it comes with a 1 page insert that says “Here is the on button. Good Luck, dickhead.”

  208. There’s almost no getting around linking mobile crap when you’re using a piece of Apple crap, Rosetta.

    Get a tablet you lazy punk. http://i.imgur.com/XwIUeTv.png

  209. Sean, what’s the 1,000 days?

  210. 1,000 days sober.


  212. Sean is 1K sober!!!

  213. Oh, and thank you nice Tiger Lady with sexy librarian glasses.

  214. He is also a closet Cubs fan.

  215. I have to know… did you get cake today?

  216. All Cubs are out of the closet.

  217. Cyn, come over here and show me how to use this thing.

    *figures she assumes my iPad, grabs crotch*


  218. I have only played with an iPad here and there; they’re kinda small.

  219. Seriously, though, you need to d/l Chrome for your eye-Pad. Way moar better than Safari.

  220. No cake today. We only do cake for birfdays, so I’ll be getting mine at the end of August, God willing.

  221. No shit!! Congratulations Sean. That is outstanding! Awesome job, my brother.

    This may sound weird since we’ve never met in real life but I am very proud of you my man. And happy for you. And a tad bit jealous of your will power.

    The only thing I’ve ever done for 1,000 days in a row is watch porn.

  222. I took a neighbor chick out to lunch today. We went to http://pappadeaux.com/home/
    it was good

  223. Actually it’s been 10,000 days in a row.

    *buys more ointment*

  224. Vmaximus, how was the sea bass?

  225. I’m still working on my record for not watching porn.

    I’m improving, but it’s an every day thing.

  226. Thanks, Rosie. Youse guys have been more help to me than you could possibly know.

  227. No cake? I call bullshit on that. Each day is a day to celebrate, and you done good. So very proud of you.

    I haven’t met you either; we must fix this SOON.

  228. *buys stock in Jergen’s; retires a brazillianaire*

  229. Is there going to be some kind of AZ meatup in the not-too-distant future? If so, I might be able to swing some time off and drive out there.

  230. Something for Leon to toss into his poat….http://tinypic.com/r/hwddhl/8

  231. the blackened mahi was over cooked but the oysters were perfection

  232. First weekend in September is the Phoenix Meat-up.
    It is on like Donkey Kong.

  233. I take that back. It was an every day thing. Nowadays it’s more of an every week thing.

  234. Shawn, I am very glad you are alive. And I kinda understand it’s life and death. You wake up tomorrow and live another day. Ok?


    The battery in this turdball is about dead. I’ll talk to you gorillas later.

  236. How long is the drive to Phoenix? I had assumed on flying. 8 hours or some such bullshit, no way.

  237. >> First weekend in September is the Phoenix Meat-up.
    It is on like Donkey Kong.

    I can lose 20 pounds by then

  238. Who am I kidding, I’m flying anyway.

  239. >>>I can lose 20 pounds by then

    Well, sure, you can.

  240. I ♥ you too, Rosetta, in a “you’re late with your library book, now bend over so I can spank you”, kinda way. Mmmmmwah!

  241. Dave, what is your twitter fight about?

  242. I can’t get the video to embed, BCoch.

  243. I’m coming to the AZ meat-up so you faggots better be fun or I’ll kill dave.

    No offense, dave.

  244. I’m so fucked. Family members that hire Sparky for birthdays and pay for Dan’s tickets to loser ASU games that involve Sparky meets in Club Suites before the game, are expecting us to get tics for ASU/UNM the same wknd.

  245. Wait, so I can get Dave killed by being unfunny?

    A plan forms.

  246. Damn. I’ve got it saved on my laptop. Would it work better if I emailed the video to you, instead of linking it?

  247. It’s only a six hour drive from LA to PHX.


  248. None taken. Homo.

    Lips I was being silly poking fun at girlmenhaters

  249. I already have a plane ticket and a smile

  250. I could save it and try uploading it to werdpuss, but I was trying to just embed the tinypic link and it was failing.

  251. I can lose 20 pounds by then

    I started zero-carbing yesterday. Green thong here I come!

  252. Werdpuss will only let you embed certain brands of video. If you can find that one out on yoUtube, this site will not try to cut you when you embed it.

  253. Because WP sucks almost as much on a bad day as AOS does on a good day?

  254. I’m still trying to figure out how I can give the FU to family and fly in to PHX.

  255. I ripped it off youtube because the links that are associated with it are garbage. “Memorial Day celebrations” which basically include hood rats wearing little to no clothing.

  256. First weekend in September is the Phoenix Meat-up.
    It is on like Donkey Kong.

    Labor Day weekend?

  257. Really, with all its flaws, WP kickx pixy day in and day out. Mu nu was never meant to host a big boy. There just isn’t enough duct tape and hamsters to keep it together.

  258. >> Green thong here I come!

    sweet talker

  259. Not Labor Day, the following: Sept 5, 6, & 7.

    I’m going to check out a few hotels in a few areas soon now to see about scoring us a good group rate.

  260. Labor Day wknd is fuxxored. Wknd after is Meat WKND.

  261. bastards. going all the way across the country. come to florida! we have beaches!

  262. My Gilbert cousins SYWM will be in ABQ that wknd to watch ASU/UNM. Dan and I are still in Discuss mode.

  263. Bcoch lives on the SHARK!!! side of FL.

  264. My first meat-up was aaaaalllllllll the way in CT. Best plane rides I ever did take.

  265. come to florida! we have beaches!
    Come to Arizona! We have bitches!

  266. Every part of the florida coast is the shark side. We’re kinda like Australia…a lot of our wildlife can fucking kill you.

  267. I though Dave lived in Texas, Cyn?

  268. >> . Best plane rides I ever did take.

    you roo?

  269. Leon, tinypic vids, just download them to your desktop, upload them to youtube, and then embed as normal.

  270. Mrs. Caruthers was low-carbing, but we apparently feed our soldiers garbage in the field.

  271. Bcoch, don’t get me started on how FL is the Australia of North America.

  272. I am still sympatico on the food thing, lipstick. I was just dreaming of pizza and ribeye. It’s chrisp and vmax who ate high on the hog.

  273. Lol, oso. My wife still has scars on her feet from freshman year in college. Apparently she was unfamiliar with the concept of “fire ants”.

  274. I’m going to check out a few hotels in a few areas soon now to see about scoring us a good group rate.

    “Yes we’d like to book a hotel room for twenty people for the evening.”

  275. Aaaannnndddd now I’ll never walk the beaches of Florida.

    Of course, trying walking barefooted here in AZ and they’ll melt right off your body. But the scars are minimal.

  276. “Yes we’d like to book a hotel room for twenty people for the evening.”

    So you HAVE been to a meat-up then. Excellent!

  277. Come to Arizona! We have bitches!

    Do you work for the state tourism board or something? Because that is slogan gold right there.

  278. J’ames, Chrisp said he and Anita had leftover pizza. Maybe you are thinking of that rat-bastard Jimbro who smoked a brisket.

  279. I H8 fire ants. I have 2 Dr cousins. 2nd one is clearly the “brain”. Brain cousin visited us in TX. Didn’t have the “Brains” to step away from the fire ant pile. She has treated my hubby for 2 skin cancers. My FiL too.

  280. time to sleep/

    goddamn AZ is hot in Sept.

  281. The beaches themselves are easy. Don’t walk in the dunes. Don’t touch jellyfish that wash up on shore. Don’t walk on the shells.

    It only gets tricky when you get in the water.

  282. Sleep tight, Dave. Muah!

  283. Sleeping. MMM @6am.

  284. I never get in the water. Rogue wave on Waikiki fucked me up.

  285. see you in the sweatbox of AZ hon bring a fan

  286. Don’t touch jellyfish that wash up on shore.

    Well duh. If you touch a jellyfish knowing that it is a jellyfish you deserve everything you get. And please put it on Youtube for our enjoyment.

  287. I was 7. Looked like trash bags. Can’t describe the agony of jumping on East Coast jellies. Until I was hit by a swarm of SoPac jellies on a wave. Hit my front. Hit my back on my way out. 1st time I had to be taken out of the ocean by lifeguards. I was so swollen they thought I would die.

  288. Oso, instead of WDW twice in a year, go to the Caribbean. Leeward side of an island.

    Although, in FL a few years back, I said “why go to the Caribbean, the water and sand is just as nice here.”

  289. Lip, lots of people think that once an animal is dead, it can’t hurt you.

    They’d be wrong.

  290. Lippy, I’m fuxxored. The fire in StL burned my records. I still don’t know if SD has enough on file to get me a passport. My Mom can’t get a passport due to the STL fire. She was in a coma when her passport needed to be renewed.

  291. Oh. I didn’t know it was you who touched a jellyfish. You were 7 though, so my theory doesn’t apply. Those occasions sound awful!

  292. >>They’d be wrong.

    And they’d be hurtin’

  293. I was stupid at 7. It was really cool until the burning!!! LOL

  294. Oso, so because of a fire in which many records were lost there is no way for who knows how many people to get passports?

  295. I was slow. I’ve been stung by a dead bee too. Jumped on it.

  296. Lippy, it is complicated. My Mom was born at home. No BC. DoD provided her passport for years. Renewal came up when my Mom was in a coma. She can’t prove POB under current DHS protocols. Unable to get passport. I could probably get a BC out of SD, so far the paperwork is ridonkulous.

  297. Lippy, the STL fire was a CF. I was able to get married to Dan by having my Baptism, First Communion, Reconciliation, and Confirmation records all in one place. Now, I can’t travel.

  298. So you were like The Hispanic Hillbillies?

    (I can say that because my mom was the first in her fam to be born in a hospital. Her 2 years older brother was born at home.)

  299. god I need sleep

  300. Dave! What are you still doing up?

    OOOO, it was the nap, right? I hear ya.

  301. I prefer Mexican Hillbillies! My grammo had 12 kids. Only 3 were born in hospitals and had coded BCs. Funny story. 3 Aunts. Maria Dolores. Maria Monica. Maria Frances. My actual Aunt Maria was supposed to be Marita. Born in Catholic Hospital. On George Washington’s Birthday. The Nuns named her. Maria Georgia

  302. Maria Georgia is a pretty name, I like that. I also like patriotic nuns better than the liberation theology kind.

  303. Have about 295 tabs open and haven’t had my daily Steyn, so I’m signing off. Goodnight latenighters.

  304. Cigar, whiskey and writing tonight. It’s nice and cool out on the balcony and I’ve got Pandora going, so life is good.

    Cyn, I don’t know if I’ll be able to make the Meat-up. I think I’ll be TDY most of September, and there’s a bowie knife seminar that I’ve already kind of committed to in early September as well.

  305. Oso, you should register and a Democrat and run for office. Then you can do whatever you want without a birth certificate and no one will dare question you!

  306. Absolution and a frozen room
    Are dreams of men below
    I try to derp it but the touch is hot
    The mirror collapses, but the image can not

  307. Yea for sean’s 1000 days!!

    although today it’s 1001, which is a cooler number, imho.

    wakey wakey

  308. Ugh. One more day of obamerjerb tomorrow. Soles of my feet have already taken a beating this weekend. Feels like walking on bruises.

    Danskos.I swear by them. My feet never, EVER hurt. But then I don’t work real doubles.

  309. Car in, there’s been a new poat since 6am.

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