1. Firt!

  2. Is this that Bryan Dennehy guy I’ve been hearing abt?

  3. http://i.imgur.com/h92WvJw.jpg?4

  4. Got a scam phone call at 7am telling me my debit card had been deactivated.

  5. Why does Cyn like men who aren’t into girls?

  6. Morning, children.

    She likes them ’cause they’re pretty , Leon.

  7. Why you gotta hate, Leon?

    is it the sink? is it making you cranky?

  8. People who want to have sex with men often are, or at least try to be.

  9. Sink’s fixed, I’m glorious.

  10. I re-ran my route yesterday where I lost my keys on sunday. No key.

    Maybe i didn’t share that story.

    Lost a car key running. 6 miles.

  11. A former co-worker went running on a work trip and her rental car got towed. Telling you, this shit is bad for you.

  12. I think we should call it heterosexual Friday.

    – oppressive cisgender patriarchy man

  13. Good morning, cool kids.

  14. Wow, the morning crew at AOS is a happy bunch, aren’t they?

  15. Peter Beinart, who has no love for GOP, is saner that party establishment here.


  16. Car in, you should take a second look at Leon’s opinion that running long distancec is bad.

  17. Ha! Didn’t read Leon’s reply before replying.

  18. Wow, the morning crew at AOS is a happy bunch, aren’t they?

    No. It’s cynical revolutionaries all the way down.

  19. I think we should call it heterosexual Friday.

    Some of the BBF girls like other girls. Sometimes they like them a lot judging by the video archives.

  20. Lunch!

  21. The shit-for-brains GOP establishment is feeling so good about themselves this morning..

  22. >> Good morning, cool kids.


    >> Some of the BBF girls like other girls

    Well it kills my suggestion but I’m not seeing the down side

  23. Dad and stepmom are on their way. Panic in 3, 2, 1…

    Thanks, Cyn, for covering HHD for me. Bunk!

  24. Why the fuck would you take your car key when you went running?


  25. Where’s Beasn? I’m looking for some reassurance that Rolla is a bunch of nerds and not a college of special snowflakes, microaggressions, trigger warnings, and “check your privilege” bullshit.

  26. White Collar is supposedly getting a shortened final season, which makes me happy. It’s a good show.

  27. I took Chief’s suggestion and started watching Penny Dreadful last night. It’s pretty good. HotBride couldn’t stomach it though.

  28. Bees Nees was up late on FB. She may be sleeping.

  29. The Petroleum Engineers I knew from Rolla were always good solid people

  30. Penny Dreadful has potential, but I’m worried they’ll find a way to screw it up. I am hoping the Irish gal sticks around awhile.

  31. Roamy, I’ve been meeting lots of Lab types from Rolla. They are all very nice. Unfortunately, they tend to wear Cards gear.

  32. Car in, you should take a second look at Leon’s opinion that running long distancec is bad.

    Whore mouths. Shut them.

    Why the fuck would you take your car key when you went running?


    Soccer game, minion must be there an hour prior. I drive to field, minion goes to warm up, I go running (with car key in pocket), and finish just as the game begins.

    I did it again yesterday.

  33. Well, allrighty then.

  34. You lost another car key yesterday?

    You’ve got to work on this.

  35. My cheapest car key to replace is $180. Ouch.

  36. I ran with the muthafocking key in my hand yesterday.

  37. First the car keys, then losing the car in the parking lot when your clicky goes down
    Next thing it’s pudding day at the care center

  38. And a catheter.

  39. I want it to be pudding day.


  40. Roamie,

    One of my best friends from the AF lives in Rolla and his oldest boy is an Engineering student there.

    Great school, good kids, nice small town.

    Not a lot of girls there, so that can be good/bad based on your perspective.

  41. There’s pudding?

    *looks around*

  42. Checked out the layover hotels for my June trips.

    Boston is at the Langham Hotel on Franklin St. I think it’s in the financial district.

    The Newark layover hotels are all in Manhattan, near Grand Central.

    LA is in Redondo Beach.

    Pretty sure the Mexico City hotel is in the beheading/narco-terrorist district.

  43. Phat, Rocketboy is learning how to cook, not only for the Scout merit badge and to not eat cafeteria food all the time but also to have the advantage over the other guys in wooing the ladies.

    Rolla seemed like a no-nonsense kind of place, except maybe for the frats.

  44. Learning to cook is a critical part of modern manhood, anymore. Modern women frequently won’t condescend to do so.

    Plus it’s the only way you can get things done the way you want them.

  45. I just tell HotBride how I want things done, and she does it.

  46. I’m looking for some reassurance that Rolla is a bunch of nerds

    Their reputation is one of teh smartehs.

  47. I took Chief’s suggestion and started watching Penny Dreadful last night.

    I guess my comment that it was really weird (good) wasn’t enough, huh?

  48. Eldest phatspawn (a HS junior) just informed me that she wants to go to George Washington University in DC to major in International Affairs and work for the State Department.

    Can I kick her out of the house now or do I have to wait until she turns 18?

  49. Send her to Tea Party Camp this summer.

  50. >> Boston is at the Langham Hotel on Franklin St

    Be sure to bring $2 for cab fare

  51. At my daughter’s graduation, this past weekend, we only attended the Honors Convocation (422) and skipped out of the regular graduation (1400 graduates). They announced each graduate’s name, their degree, and where they came from.
    At lunch, Mr Beasn said, ‘There’s going to be a lot of umemployed kids’.
    There were a lot of education majors (a good program which the school is known for), business majors, quite a few hospitality/global cultures/environmental majors – wtf?

    Only a few math and comp sci (surprises me since they do have a good program).

  52. Someone just backed into my fucking car. At least he was honest enough to come in and tell me.

    I swear to God this is the fourth time this has happened.

  53. Can I kick her out of the house now or do I have to wait until she turns 18?

    Why couldn’t she just do drugs and drink like other troubled kids?

  54. Someone just backed into my fucking car. At least he was honest enough to come in and tell me.

    I swear to God this is the fourth time this has happened.

    Had the person just been running?

  55. I just walked into a wooden thing while at the farmer’s market. OMG, I’m surprised I didn’t break my leg. It hurts so muthafocking much.

  56. Hah. Scott is getting so good at cooking, he overrules me now. He poses things to me as a choice, but actually it is a quiz, with right and wrong answers.

    Last night, he set up the Big Green Egg for me:

    scott: do you want to roast the chicken, or grill the chicken?
    me: (slight hesitation) roast.
    scott: *sets deflector dish inside grill* (his silence tells me this was the correct answer)

    scott: what temperature do you want to cook at?
    me: 400.
    scott: you should do it at 325.
    me: why do you even ask anymore, smartypants?

  57. Jeebus – what is it with You People in Michigan and claims?!

  58. I’ve got ice on it and it’s just making it worse. I should go get some dirt.

  59. What do you mean “you people”?

  60. UGH!!! When I’m in a sweaty tank top and holey jeans, frickin’ covered with dirt and bug spray, and the sink is full of dishes, THIS is when my MIL pulls a ‘drop in.’ Fantastic. Love it.

    I swear, one of these days when she pulls into the driveway I’m going be prepared and find a way to make it look like I’m frantically mopping up a puddle of blood when she peeks into the kitchen window.

  61. Car In,

    Maybe if I put a brass pole in the basement it will prod her into a more respectable career than working for the government.

    *says the International Affairs (Soviet Studies, FTW!) major and former career government employee.

  62. Can I kick her out of the house now or do I have to wait until she turns 18?

    Tell her that she’ll enjoy being sent to some remote craphole country and abanded to die by her bosses.

  63. Maybe I should get a different color car – like bright red or something.

  64. Good idea. A pole. And leave a bottle of value-rite in her room.

  65. phat, tell her okay but only if she uses her State career to become a lobbyist. Those revolving-door people make big jing.

  66. Laura,

    Put some red dye on a baseball bat and rub it with a rag when she comes in.

    Just say, ‘Sorry, your boy was gettin’ little ‘lippy’ about cooking temps last night.’

  67. Laura, I was headed to the garden, with my newly acquired bleeding heart ( I didn’t have one, ridiculous, right? I KNOW~????), when I walked into a wood thing. Now I’m laid up with ice on my leg. I think it will be ok in a few.

  68. Laura, attach a tracking device to her car and set your computer to give you an alert whenever she comes within a five mile radius of your house.

  69. Nessie the Wonderdog has really cut down on my MIL drop-in visits.

    She loves MIL, but expresses it by putting her paws on MIL’s shoulders and knocking her around a bit.

  70. Sorry about your leg cArIn. Are you sure it is not a running injury?

  71. It’s a tumor.

  72. Prostate malfunction

  73. You better have it looked at.

  74. And, of course, there was a handle of Tito’s just sitting out on the counter too. Great. Just great.

    Carin, my legs have many old scars from stepping into rebar stakes and logs and hose guides and stuff. It sounds to me like you got a good whack and maybe bruised the bone.

    Probably would not have been so bad but for your enhanced speed and powerful stride which is due to those crazy exercises you are always doing. If you were slower and weaker you would be able to garden today.

  75. just bribed my son to cut the lawn (and it’s really long) for a thing of starbursts.


  76. winning.

  77. The ice made it hurt more, but the dirt helped. I’ll be in that garden.

  78. Car In family theater:

    ‘Dad! Mom’s already into the rum!’


  79. Car In family theater:

    ‘Dad! Mom’s already into the rum!’ win!”



  80. Hey, a guy came by, looking for someone else, and he offered to to take down a HUGE dead tree that is gonna fall on my power line eventually. It’s a really tall white pine. He’ll do it in exchange for some big wood we’ve had sitting along our driveway for YEARS. You’d need a special (expensive, large) chainsaw to get it anyway, so DONE.

  81. You sure it’s not for the marijuana plants and peyote buds in your backyard?

  82. There’s a BIG WOOD joke in there somewhere.

    Too sober to come up with it now. I’ll check back in an hour.

  83. I have a lot of big wood at my place.

  84. Car in – wear shin guards from now on when approaching the garden….

  85. Petrified opossum doesn’t count as “big wood”.

  86. What counts as “big wood”?

  87. I’ve got a couple of fallen trees, trunks are 1′ at the base for one and 3′ at the base for the other.

  88. Joy of joys – the Messican meat markets around here carry fresh-rendered lard (aka Manteca)! “Just come to the kitchen and it’s right there next to the meat counter”

    Sending DD#3 out for some later this afternoon.

    Was going to try rendering my own, but you can’t find pork fat to save your life in any of the grocery stores/markets where we usually shop.

  89. What’ll he want for some Pecos salt cedar with a scorpion nest?

  90. Heya all. My arms hurt! :D

  91. I saw Three College Girls open for Big Wood at the Peter North memorial arena in ’08.

  92. There’s a Peter North memorial arena?

  93. Hi revvy, hope you like Big Wood. It’s the topic deJour

  94. It’s a swimming pool, leon.

  95. Haven’t shown you all pics of my boyfriend yet, huh J’Ames? :P (sorry, had to go there)

  96. Yes, you did. Well played.

  97. Bloomberg is a moron:


    I don’t mind the alcohol, but turning away people who the site is designed for? What an ass.

  98. Hi, Revvy! How’s tricks?

  99. Sorry
    Twigs don’t count

  100. Teresa, I have two armfuls full of vaccinations and spent a few hours in the emergency room last night for a severe panic attack, but otherwise, I’m doin good. Gotta caffeinate for an online class in a few hours.

  101. Got a graduation announcement/invitation from one of Rocketboy’s classmates. Um, thanks? I can’t figure out if she’s showing off her fancy schmancy Shutterfly cards, begging for gifts, or what. It’s not like they were dating – he asked her to homecoming, and she turned him down.

    I should RSVP just to see what happens.

  102. Revvy, sorry to hear about the panic attack.

  103. What’d they jab you with Revvy?

    Hopefully none of that mind control government poison.

  104. It’s all right, I just felt like an idiot cause I thought I was having an adverse reaction to a vaccine. I kinda was (emotional issues are apparently a side effect of the polio vaccine), but it wasn’t anything serious. Felt like a jerk for making my boy worry, though he did earn about a billion brownie points that night.

  105. Jimbro – polio, Tdap, Hep A/B, and flu. Plus I had a PPD done and blood titers drawn.

  106. Dang, Revvy – what’d you need all of that stuff for?

    And what class are you taking online (if I’m not being too nosy)? Going for another degree, or just something for fun?

    Glad the panic attack wasn’t anything too serious! ♥♥♥

  107. I’m taking a job at the AFB in the clinic, so I have to get pretty much all of the same vaccs that the deployed do. The class is for the same thing.

  108. Comment by leoncaruthers on May 21, 2014 11:55 am
    Learning to cook is ……. the only way you can get things done the way you want them.

  109. That’s a lot of jabs but probably a good idea when you’re routinely mingling with world travelers.

  110. I always viewed my cooking, survival cleaning and laundry skills as vital to remaining single as long as I did.

  111. Oh I definitely get why I had to get them done – just sucks cause now my arms are useless above the elbow. Also – for your daily ‘fuck Obamacare’ news, the clinic I went to for the flu and Hep shots was supposed to also give me the Tdap, but couldn’t because the only doses they had in stock were earmarked for the uninsured, so I had to go to a nearby drugstore instead. And I was actually told explicitly that this was due to ACA regulations.

  112. LA is in Redondo Beach


  113. Gardening project for the day DONE.

    Now I relax for a bit before my Obamajob.

    OH WAIT~!!!!! Very exciting news.

    )Everyone sit down.


    *everyone jump up and down in excitement

    I bought my dad a martin house a few years back, and we put it up and waited and waited. I have about THREE families busily making nests today. Good thing the kids killed a patch of grass for the Martins to use. Apparently that stuff’s THE SHIT, the way they’ve been going back and forth for HOURS to lug it into their house.

  114. I was kinda interested when I thought it said, “I have martinis in my house.” But it’s just some fucking birds. Meh.

  115. Lucky, Mr Car in knows not to give a similar response to PG.

  116. Martins are amazing birds. Don’t make me go about them . I will.

  117. Are they like barn swallows?

    MJ knows about it.

  118. It is a swallow,sywm.

  119. How purple is your martin?

  120. Barn swallows make an awful mess, but I loved them when I used to mow the pastures where I grew up, they always swooped around the mower in circles, catching insects out of the air that I stirred up.


  121. YAY Car in, on your martins!

    I was doing a little gardening yesterday morning and two were flying around my head.

    I’ve not seen them around here before. Up at the farm, but not here.

  122. I’d see them on the lake, but since I didn’t have a house for them. Now they are swooping all over the place. I LOVE them.

  123. >> And, of course, there was a handle of Tito’s just sitting out on the counter too

    How YOU doin

  124. Oh. My. God. Trying to engage a climate change believer is like trying to discuss cellular mitosis with a 3 year old.

  125. Mmmmm… martinis….

  126. I have Yuengling Summer Wheat beer. I shall consume one with my dinner this evening.

  127. I have Mexican Coca-Cola made with PCS. I’ll enjoy that with my lunch.

  128. I had Mexican coke for lunch.

  129. Alex – You may wish to blow your nose. . . just sayin’.

  130. We don’t have Martins here, west of the Pecos
    We shoot ’em on sight

  131. TJ – I’m wondering why that longhorn in your avatar doesn’t have a yarmulke?

  132. MCPO
    The difference is that most three year olds are potty trained

  133. Jay, are you around? Do you know of a good primer on IIS AD authentication?

  134. That’s a Reformed Longhorn

    He’s ashamed of who he is and claims to be a Hereford

  135. In a little over a week, I’m going to frac a well and use Halliburton to do it

    That’s 2/3rds of the “Fuck You Al Gore!” trifecta

  136. What’s the last third?

  137. We don’t have Martins here, west of the Pecos
    We shoot ‘em on sight

    You have Martinez, it’s illegal cousin.

  138. Gardens look darn good. Now it’s time for obamajob .

  139. My gas-guzzling Hummer

  140. Plus, my avatard farts lots of methane

  141. What’s the last third?

    Having your 7th chakra released when the first gas comes up.

  142. I don’t know of one, leon, sorry. I’ve read through the ADAM stuff, but nothing primarily on AD

  143. Thanks anyhow.

  144. …the only doses they had in stock were earmarked for the uninsured….

    You must be mistaken, Comrade – there are no “uninsured” in Obama’s Amerikkka.

  145. There’s a Hummer joke to be made, but I’ve already checked the block for May.

  146. Do you know of a good primer on IIS AD authentication?

    “Abandon all hope, ye who enter here”?

  147. Look, Dog, I don’t want to know it, I have to know it.

    I hate this shit.

  148. “Abandon all hope, ye who enter here”?

    Heh, that’s a pretty good summation! Just make sure you check for blanks.

  149. So, I want to boast a little: this weekend, my dog Beta and I earned her United States Dog Agility Association’s Agility Dog Championship (we simply call it an ADCH). It is an award earned by qualifying (perfect score) at least 5 times in each of the 5 different events, plus 5 times in the tournament events. Many people/dogs get there, but many never do – I didn’t with my first dog, and neither did my wife with her first two dogs.

    I think it would be equivalent to getting invited to try out for a semi-pro sports team. It means you’re more than just a backyard enthusiast. You get a really big ribbon and the cross bar from the last jump as a memento. I’ll be smiling for at least a week.

  150. I hate this shit.

    I hear you – I have been trying to run performance tests against Exchange servers for the past few days. I am a potential threat to Microsoft developers, at the moment.

  151. Afternoon.

  152. Congratulations, AD (and Beta)! That’s quite an accomplishment, and definitely something to be proud of :-D

  153. Today I built two (2) of these:


  154. Congratulations AD.

  155. Congratulations, Jewstin.

  156. If you do facedouche, you can find my simple post about it here.

  157. Grats, AD.

  158. Jewstin, I’m curious – I assume those things take power to keep things warm – is it standard 120V, or higher?

  159. Those particular ones are 120v. We make some 208 and 220, but they’re not as common.

    Except the proofers. We make a lot of them for 220v.

  160. 220, 221, whatever it takes.

  161. Wow. Mr. Mom reference kills posts?

  162. Congratulations, AD.

    You should be very proud of yourself and Beta. I’m sure that took many, many hours of work.

  163. Beta>>>> my idiot dogs

  164. Benny ate a dandelion today, and didn’t pee on the carpet.

    *wins 1st place trophy*

  165. Cat medicated, horses fed, chickens fed, coop cleaned, puppy eating. Still to do: feed cats, get 3 more hours of work work done.

    I can do that while sipping a cocktail.

  166. First it was “Goodbye, Jaguar.”

    Then it was “Goodbye, hobby car.”

    This weekend, it’s “Goodbye, hot tub.”

    Can’t afford to fix it or run it, can’t even give it away, due to the cost of having it moved.

    So, gonna hack it to pieces and haul it to the dump this weekend.

    This Obamaconomy is freaking AWESOME!!!!

  167. Sympathies, Wiserbud. That sucks.

  168. Congrats, AD. That’s impressive.

  169. We have swallows that nest on our back porch. I love to losten to them talk.

  170. It would make a nice water garden.

  171. When my house was being worked on about 7 years ago one of the younger workers took my hot tub for free. I rarely used it and it was running up my electric bill. It was pretty old and, in the winter, the wind on the back deck was wicked. Don’t miss it all.

  172. >>>Don’t miss it all.

    Wiserbride won’t, but it was nice to have it after shoveling

  173. Koi pond.

  174. >>>It would make a nice water garden.

    not exactly addressing the whole “costly to run and needs new pumps” thingy….

  175. The people who sold us the farm were in the middle of putting in a hot tub when they decided to sell the place. There’s a slab under the deck for one. I continue to wonder what went down that they had to sell in the middle of that.

  176. Don’t look under the slab.

  177. We’ve been trying to get rid of a baby grand piano for years. Can’t even give it away. Really hate to take it to the dump, been in the family for 70 years.

  178. Off to a memorial service at the local Legion hall. We’re losing more every year than we gain.

    This will suck as all events this week will sucketh. Not a lot of combat vets in my little town so I have to ‘represent’, as the kids say.

    Y’all be good.

  179. My parents sold their baby grand. With their house.

  180. When we sold the inn we donated the grand piano to a local church. They flipped out, plus we got to deduct it at tax time.

  181. wiserbud, make it a memorial and gift shop

  182. The dump is too far away, set it on fire.

  183. Yeah, just think of it as an ornery stump.

  184. >>>The dump is too far away, set it on fire.

    Neighbor and I plan to burn as much as we can, but most of it is fiberglass and composite wood.

    I’m sure that burning that crap would cause the spontaneous death of most of my neighb……


  185. Are the keys ivory?

  186. >>>wiserbud, make it a memorial and gift shop

    Ooooooo….. I like that idea.

    I can sell velvet Obamas…..

  187. Let me know if you need a hand, wiserbud. I have implements of destruction and most of the weekend off.

  188. Youtube it.

  189. Link it on your radio show website, explain why on the show.

  190. Drink the drink of the week during the youtubing. Radio gold.

  191. Ace really went on about that gift shop today

  192. I think I’m going to quit my job and write a series of novels about the 2nd Crusade. Because I hate this shit.

  193. >> Let me know if you need a hand, wiserbud. I have implements of destruction and most of the weekend off.

    Hey, wiser, the shed in the back. You don’t call it “my murder shack” do you?

  194. *looks out to “murder barn”*

  195. Things go there to die,

  196. >>>Hey, wiser, the shed in the back. You don’t call it “my murder shack” do you?

    Not anymore.

    Scott, We’ve already done partial destruction.

    We plan massive destruction on Friday night.

    You are invited to the fun

  197. Congratulations, ADog. Ditto mucho on what Wiser said, that must have taken a lot of hours of training. You have every right to be glowing with pride.

    Wiserdude, that sucks and I’m sorry about the hot tub.

  198. Hot Tub Time Machine

  199. Beta is a good looking dog. Love the markings. Male or female?

  200. Hot Tub Hootenanny. Hosted by Ken’s Truck.

  201. I did crackfat today.

    Teak chest up a flight of stairs, because I was mad.

  202. Hootenanny is one of the top ten funniest words ever.

  203. I was mad too.

    People see my tall, wiry, beanpole husband grab an end of something very heavy, and assume things that they shouldn’t assume.Then they say stupid things that they will soon have to eat without condiments.

  204. Congratulations AD and Beta.

  205. Unless you’re a nanny.

  206. What are the best condiments for shit?

  207. Frank’s Red Hot.

  208. Chopped peanuts.

  209. “What are the best condiments for shit?”


  210. If Laura’s back was right, we could have made a statement.

  211. FFS.

    *throws things*

    Good evening hostages.

  212. Heinz 57 goes well with everything

  213. Angry Mover Solutions, LLC

  214. backs.. oh hey Scott I meant to thank you for the fluids and rest advice.. I pretty much stayed still on Sunday and drank a bunch of water and my trap eased up.

  215. Bcock, what, pray tell, has lead you to the throwing of things?

  216. I’mma cut a bitch if I can’t figure out why my wireless printer will print some stuff, but not others.

  217. The inability to comment at a certain unnamed site. From any browser.

  218. Well, it isn’t this one, and this is the only one really worth commenting at.

    *totally ends sentence with a preposition, like a boss*

  219. Lol. I’m seeing that Leon.

  220. I occasionally comment at NextBigFuture, but this is pretty much the only place I share thoughts other than Fitocracy, and that’s very domain-specific.

  221. bc if it’s ace’s (which imploded last week), email me your IP and I can make some tech things happen.

    If it’s not, well tough shit.

  222. It is DiT.

    I’m getting the 500 message on safari and chrome.

    I’ll email you.

  223. Rachel Maddow is defending the VA guy because Iraq War.

    Liberals are fucking nuts.

  224. Alright, how do I find my IP address?

  225. xb – does it have an aversion to specific types of pr0n?

  226. on a different note:

  227. Husband had to stop cutting the grass because he ran over a rabbit’s nest right smack in the middle of the dang yard. Four bunnies scattered.
    Went out to have a looksee. One was dead. :(
    One was next to the nest and the other two some distance away. Momma came for a visit about 20 minutes ago. She wrapped two up with fresh grass and the third was still huddled about 4 feet away. I had Mr. Beasn scoop him up and put him on the nest where he finally moved and squirmed himself down the hole.

    They is really little.

    Stoopid rabbits. Though last year, she birthed them under my porch where they ate my garden all up.

  228. Rachel Maddow is … fucking nuts.

    What I read.

  229. hang on bc, I can probably get it from your comments here

  230. got it

  231. Ok I keep you posted

  232. Cool. Thanks Dave.

  233. beasn has a heart for critters, even when they eat her garden.

  234. “What are the best condiments for shit?”

    “coprophagia and you : a guide to cooking shit right”

  235. Is now a bad time to link a recipe for hasenpfeffer?

  236. Dude! Beasn breeds bunnies as bait. She loves birds of prey. Kind of diabolical.

  237. For Laura….http://tinyurl.com/nuv3n4g

  238. Mrs. Caruthers is away for another week. I had considered this being the week I figure out if I’m capable of rabbit farming.

  239. So I can comment now. If that was you, DiT, thanks so much.

  240. FYI…TittyFace Jenkins passed away today. As of now the cause of death is unknown but they suspect he was humped by lauraw.

    RIP TittyFace Jenkins.

  241. I’m really going to miss Tittyface Jenkins.

  242. *takes back his thanks*

  243. BC I haven’t heard back from Pix so I don’t know anything’s been done yet. He’s in Australia so it’s coming up on morning there tomorrow.

    Who’s the fat bald guy?

  244. I was able to comment for like 10 minutes. And then…*poof*

  245. Tittyface Jenkins never accepted my friend request on FB. I guess he never will now. Sigh.

  246. I’m overcome with grief. I must retire for the evening.

  247. It’s probably you

  248. Is now a bad time to link a recipe for hasenpfeffer?

    *eyeballs Humpty*

    Dude! Beasn breeds bunnies as bait. She loves birds of prey. Kind of diabolical.

    Nuh uh.

    *quietly closes the basement door*

    Nah, I lurve me some bunnies and they deserve a fair shot at trying to live to adulthood. But….if a hawk or an owl needs to feed their own pups…they won’t go to waste.

  249. Did anybody use a Ouija Board to contact anybody else’s spirit today?

  250. I meant it’s probably you to bc oso, not yous

  251. Only at the 9/11 Museum. Too soon?

  252. I’ll never be able to take Tittyface Jenkins over to the Ano Nuevo Club in Boy’s Town in Juarez again for six dollar mamadas ever again :-(

  253. DiT, I figured that. Bringing my FB drama here. Apparently, my appreciation for Miley Cyrus music isn’t appreciated by some of you. Hey, at least it isn’t Pink Floyd! Amirite?

  254. Rosie!!!!!

    *tackles the fat bald guy*

    I’m finally around when you show up!!!!!
    How’s things?

  255. WTF if you shit on Pink Floyd music you are DEAD TO ME.

    Rosetta has a dog named Floyd. Just sayin

  256. *cough*

  257. Hahaha. Sends out Catsignal to Cyn. I actually H8 Fleetwood Mac more than PF. PF is more of a solidarity dealio with Cynabuns.

  258. *give Oso a halfa fist bump on PF, but less for the dis to Fleetwood Mac*

  259. OMG I have FB friends already buying tickets for the FM reunion tour. Kill me NAO!!! Dan has a concert friend that he goes to crappy concerts with. AKA Old fogey night.


  261. The first time we went to the USS Arizona Memorial, we were part of a mixed group of Japanese tourists and Americans. The Japanese people were reverent and very nice. The American kids were running and climbing on the rails. I wanted to pitch them into the water, but the men interred there, didn’t deserve to have their eternal spot besmirched by assholes.

  262. Oh, Otter….

  263. Hi Mandi

  264. It’s hard to be mad at the kids though, those rails and the water, it’s exciting! I seem to remember wanting to enjoy the rails a bit too.

    I remember something at my grandfather’s funeral service that always stayed with me; the Googleman was maybe all of 8 months old and getting a bit squirmy and noisy and let out a cute little shriek at one point. The reverend smiled and looked down at my son and reminded us all that while we were there to pay our respects, life does go on and my grandfather was probably looking down and enjoying those little noises of his namesake.

  265. Watching Men at Work with the boy. Stupid movie, but funny stupid.

  266. “Rosetta has a dog named Floyd. Just sayin”

    Rosie is my older brother?

  267. Rosie is my older brother sister

  268. Cyn, I’ve had more than my share of inappropriate laughter at funerals. Stuff I will be spending LOTS of time in Purgatory (Not CO) for. This was just…and then, the last time we went, 9/11 restrictions are ridonkulous.

  269. Dan is being ridiculous. Some school cancelled honor ceremonies so dumb kids don’t feel bad. Dan is watching baseball and he’s triggered by comfy seats behind home plate. Every seat should be a comfy seat!

  270. I told a joke at dad’s memorial service. I wasn’t even sure I could get through it. But everyone got it, he loved to tell jokes. I only drank from the water bottle seven times. Timing a bit off but I delivered on the punchline.

  271. You are brave, Dave; not sure I coulda gotten through that without nine or ten drinks ;)

  272. I owed him one

  273. I laughed inappropriately loudly; thanks, Tushar!

  274. Just got back from the Legion memorial.

    Good to be a member, sad to lose so many.

    As a bad WWII movie once said: ‘Where do we get such men?’

    From Ace’s sidebar:

    The spirit of tomfoolery is something, maybe the only thing I miss about the military.

    Civilians don’t get the gallows humor of combat vets and they never will.

  275. Korean War movie, FYI.

  276. Phat, Hostages really seem to get gallows humor.

  277. DiT, I bet the people that knew your Dad loved it.

  278. It turns out that TittyFace Jenkins died from a combination of gluten and being smothered by daveintexas’s enormous labia from a face sitting.

    Poor TittyFace Jenkins.

    Though we hardly knew ye, we liked to laugh at your name and we kept it a secret that you were really wiserbud.

    Godspeed TittyFace. Godspeed.

    *sobs uncontrollably*

    *makes new cocktail*

  279. Tushar: I just made $857,977.01 from sucking dick!

    Rosetta: Haha! No way! Who gave you the penny?

    Tushar: No one. Daveintexas wrote me a check for $857,977.01.


  280. Rosetta doesn’t get to make cocktails!!! That’s MJs job. This is BS!

  281. TittyFace Jenkins. I will AVENGE YOU!

    Just after this lovely parfait.


  282. Ossobucco makes cocktails!

    Go! Now!

    *releases phat’s sex tape with Justin Bieber*

    *makes no money because TMZ already released it*

  283. oso, the laughter made me feel good.

    HEY FATASS GET HERE EARLIER ON A SCHOOL NIGHT. miss you brother, and hope you and your dear family are well and by well I mean your gal still has the hots for me.

    I’m beat, night yall

  284. I’ve been making Evan and diet 7. Not really a cocktail. Just a drink.

  285. >> Korean War movie, FYI.

    Bridges at Toko-Ri.. James Michener

  286. Have I told the goat story here?

  287. Oso, the hostages I’ve met have been awesome.

    Ace’s place has gotten so big that the guys I knew from the old days are now COB’s.

    I have few DC layover’s next month.

    Hope to meet up Gabe.

  288. phat, I’m enjoying the Carmen San Diego aspect of your new job.

  289. Well, that sounded dirty. Didn’t mean it that way.

  290. Hi, Rosie!

  291. Meat up Gabe is dirtier.

  292. Oso,

    Off to bed.

    Wife is pissed at me.

    Not a surprise.

  293. Meeting gabe would be awesome.. he’s a great kid.


  294. I don’t really post too much here any more because of a monstrously cute 3 year old and work and crap.

    However I would like to draw on the demented geniuses that read this blog.

    I am in a war with one of our neighbors. Our backyards back up to each other and these assholes call the cops on us when Floyd lets out a loud fart or when we have people over. It’s fucking irritating.

    I recognize that I can’t just kill them although I would prefer that. What I want to do is irritate the crap out of them so they move.

    Any suggestions?

    Tonight I played classical music as loud as fuck because what, you’re going to call the cops on BeethOven?

  295. Hi Teresa! FYI Henry moved to his big boy bed a few weeks ago and one of his must haves is the stuffed bulldog you gave him.

    I’m not saying he hasn’t peed on it but he loves it.

  296. Can you get chickens? What are the zoning rules? Can you put dog poop in a special trashcan on their fence line until it fills up?

  297. Canada’s SiL moved in. He smokes dope in the garage. We get to smell pot 24/7 now. PTSD guy to the East is on medicinal marijuana. Getting contact highs from the South and the East.

  298. Eh the bulldog poop sort of started the problem but they’ve been dicks since we’ve moved in prior to Floyd and Daisy fertilizing their lawn.

    I’ve thought about pooping on their lawn myself but I’m uncomfortable with that.

    I have peed on their lawn though.

  299. I am not understanding the part about you can’t kill them

  300. Can you position security lighting so that it shines in their bedroom windows?

  301. Glad the boy likes the pup, Rosie!

    You should tell the cops that you have to make things loud enough to cover up the sounds of your neighbor beating his wife.

  302. DiT, it is MO. They’re kind of weird.

  303. Our neighbors like to go outside and have loud conversations on their phones.

  304. Beethoven isn’t extreme enough – gotta go with opera. Instruments AND voices.

  305. True confession. We don’t clean up after our dogs. We even have a locally funded Poop Fairy campaign that tries to shame people into cleaning up after their dogs. Former Mayor was a total douche about dog poop. My dogs don’t wear leashes and we don’t send money to TX to register them.

  306. We engaged in dog poop wars with our neighbors. They started putting baby diapers in our trash can. We let our dogs poop on their welcome mat. We are in an uneasy truce right now.

  307. The lighting thing I considered but that would give them a legitimate beef.

    What I really want is for everyone that reads this blog to mail them a dead fish or maybe a cow pie. Maybe a cow’s tongue.

    A pornographic magazine subscription would also be excellent. I will reimburse everyone for anything you send them.

    If these weren’t my neighbors I would have already made them check into an old folks home from the mocking.

    The fact they butt up to our property limits me. Other than the aforementioned peeing on their lawn.

  308. They’re old? Sweet. Lots of random loud noises.

  309. Ixnay on the Beethoven. Play some Car in music. QOTSA. Tool.

  310. Bottle rockets.

  311. Neighbor war is a new experience for me. I’m used to punching assholes in the face which is a much easier solution but I can’t really do that.

    I am in the process of becoming best friends with the cops so that should help.

    We have 30 people in our neighborhood who are awesome and have become friends of ours so it’s just these fucking douche bags.

    *buys cannon*

  312. Build a pool, Rosie.

  313. When I lived in a crappy neighborhood in Big Spring ages ago my idiot neighbor spent half his time beating his drunk wife
    He was on probation from Huntsville
    One day he started beating her right on my shiny brand new Dodge Turbo Diesel truck
    At that point, I went outside and threatened to totally kick his ass

    I visited a friend there about 10 years later and they were still married but now lovey dovey
    I don’t understand this world, I decided at that point

  314. Tonight I alternated playing Beethoven’s 9th and DJ Assault’s Fuck You Ho.

    Both of which are excellent songs by the way.

  315. Friending cops is good. They might not kill your dogs when they respond to a noise complaint.

  316. Start cleaning your guns outside.

  317. Also if you were to pick a pair of Howler Monkeys, I’m thinking that would help.

  318. When I was at UNM, living in the student ghetto, my Mom was so funny when she’d visit. She kept calling 911. It was so embarrassing. Guys beating their girlfriends in the parking lot and people throwing others out of cars was so usual to us, that we were kind of shocked that my Mom thought it was 911 worthy.

  319. Madame Butterfly, The Ring cycle, Don Giovanni, Tosca, La Boheme….

    Hit ’em with the classics and ask them what they have against a little cultcha

  320. I’ve got it!!! Find some Linda Ronstadt Mariachi music. If they object, they are racist and RWNJs.

  321. Londa Ronstadt?
    Why not go full Mexican with Pedro Infante?

  322. Pedro Infante doesn’t make me want to pop a blood vessel.

  323. I really H8 Americans that grew up under the umbrella of liberty that our Vets provided. Home grown hippies piss me off more than anything.

  324. RL FB friends have true American heroes as parents. Most of them are hippie douchebags. Their Dads…we will never know. One of my friend’s Mom was the CIA operative.

  325. FFS. Panama by VH.

  326. Linda Ronstadt was pretty mild
    She had a pretty strong voice, but wasn’t a Lucha Villa

    Lucha Villa would have made them cry for mercy

  327. I don’t like LR because of her politics. MCPO is a better person than I am. He likes lots of hippie music.

  328. I have to admit that when she started out, LR have me Big Wood, but I was just a young teenage lad

  329. Spanish eyes. You can’t combat the cray cray though.

  330. This is Full Mexican
    An entire movie about cockfighting

  331. Ew. Some of my Hondo cousins raise cocks for fighting. Some raise pit bulls. They tend to be the drug selling/gang banging branch as well.

  332. It does tend to be a pretty low rent occupation
    Plus illegal over here

    The movie,” El Gallo de Oro” was a huge hit. One of the biggest films ever made in Mexico.
    It’s actually a very sad story.

  333. TJ, they all are. Different worldview.

  334. True.

    As a weird aside, the screenplay of El Gallo de Oro was by Mexico’s greatest author, Carlos Fuentes AND Gabriel Garcia Marquez ( Cien Anos de Soledad)
    Lot of talent there for a cockfighting flick

  335. Ugh. I H8D having to read GGM and Allende.

  336. Soledad was pretty good, I thought
    Allende sucked
    Puig was better with “Kiss of the Spiderwoman” THAT was a strange book..and film
    I liked Fuentes

  337. KotSW. Very. I just don’t like being told what to read and what to like.

  338. I don’t like Maya Angelou or Alice Walker, either.

  339. Zora Neale Hurston.

  340. I know
    I never read these for a class
    Just for myself
    Much better

  341. Not a fan of Faulkner. Or Steinbeck. Or Hemingway. Still had to read them.

  342. I was in school before the PC police came in in the late 70’s
    My original Norton’s had very little of that bullshit in it
    Now the most recent Norton’s is full of shit from Denise Chavez and Alice Walker, who sucks

  343. My Dad had an extensive library. My Mom read Readers Digest condensed books. I read everything.

  344. I liked Faulkner, in parts
    Steinbeck I grew up with
    Hemingway was the rage back then, but the PC police have pretty well destroyed him since then

  345. Classic Comics. I’d read the graphic novel version of Count of Monte Christo before I ever read the original.

  346. My Dad loved Poe and Kipling. He read to us. Lots of Tennyson.

  347. Norman Mailer came to UT for a lecture and hung out with us until dawn drinking
    I was 18 then and he was the big thing
    He was very talented but a strange little man

  348. Very cool.

  349. That’s funny
    My daughter asked me about Kipling just this evening
    My dad used to read Jungle Book to me when I was little.
    Now I’m sad :-(

    Goodnight Osita!!

  350. Tony Hillerman taught journalism at UNM. One of my roommates was a J-school major. Editor of the Daily Lobo. I met him through her. Great guy.

  351. G’night TJ.

  352. Back in the world of disposable emotion
    In the climate of temporary dreams
    He wasn’t looking for a notch on his bedpost
    A derp to push, pull and burst at the seams

  353. Jim Caviezel’s Count of Monte Cristo was pretty good, but I haven’t read the book and cannot comment on its faithfulness to the source material.

  354. wakey wakey

  355. Morning, children.

  356. I’m going to have to mow tomorrow if the weather cooperates.

  357. My dad and stepmom made it here safely.

    I still have my copy of Norton’s. Don’t know about Alice Walker, but it did have e.e. cummings. I liked T.S. Eliot better.

  358. I have all my Norton’s too. I have a lot, since I was an English Major.

  359. I stopped reading/commenting at Ace’s when i started having commenting problems. It would get solved, then start again. this was YEARS ago.

  360. My Norton’s is around somewhere. Well worn and underlined.

  361. I read a lot of Greek plays. I still have those on the shelf, along with The Decameron and the Divine Comedy. Didn’t read anything more recent in college.

  362. What’s a Norton? Antivirus?

  363. I have a collection of Norton’s going from the late 60’s to the present

    It’s depressing to see the political faddishness and PC mania slowly creep in. It’s now well over 40 percent third class minority authors and deservedly very obscure female writers you’ve never heard of.

  364. My Norton’s are from 86-91 range.

  365. TJ, white men can’t and haven’t written anything important ever. I mean, they wrote oppressive documents like the Declaration of Independence and stuff, too many triggers.

    I suffered through I, Rigoberta Menchu in a college class. After it was widely known that she was a complete fraud. Because it was truthy.

  366. The Left still loves that book even though it’s a complete fraud

  367. G’morning cool kids.

  368. All day seminar. There is a skanky strip club within walking distance. Almost a coincidence.

  369. I went back to college (UT/Austin) for a graduate degree in my 40’s Petroleum Engineering with an emphasis on Geophysics

    I took some English lit courses because I enjoyed reading literature.
    Boy, that was like another world from my first go-round..

  370. In Austin, no less. Practically Berkley.

  371. Poat of newness unfurled

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