MMM 115: 30000 mile maintenance edition

Camry’s going in for 30k internal tidying today. It’s been problem-free so far, but maintenance is important and I won’t put it off. Neither should you! What part of life are you neglecting? Are you taking care of yourself? Your loved ones? Your tools? It’s still Lent, so I’m doing a lot of reflecting and personal inventory in addition to getting my chassis lubed. What I’ve learned is that reflection and personal inventory just fill me with regret, shame, and remorse, so I’m not sure I recommend it to anyone. Maintenance, though, absolutely critical. Don’t skip it, you’ll only kick yourself for it later.

Cowgirl, reversed.
tumblr_ltg9z5MKHB1r48djso1_500

Pullups in booty shorts.
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Try not to focus on the veiny arm.
tumblr_m9n28rzqbp1rpfztqo1_1280
‘Merica.
tumblr_m9qn12f7F21rpfztqo1_1280
Warm, sandy beach.
tumblr_mwq4rzpM231s86g7po1_500
Abs in panties.
tumblr_n1g6u22udj1rsftapo1_1280
Strapless.
tumblr_n1m6bkR3Pp1s1512fo1_500
Tasteful monochrome.
tumblr_n1vhhvOEWa1rpfztqo1_500
Focused monochromatic effort.
tumblr_n2cd2ri2wp1qd1n1bo1_1280
And now a little ginger.
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Booyah. All y’all have a kickass week, folks.

376 Comments

  1. Nice work Leon.

    ‘Merica is a dude. Rare ginger MMM and cowgirl tie for first place.

  2. Morning, children.

  3. That’s Linda Durbesson, Jimbro. I believe I have seen confirmation of her un-dude-ness in some weaker moments, but that was a couple of years ago now.

  4. Did you get your test results, Leon?

  5. Greet someone in beautiful cursive letters

  6. Or a bit of Disney flair

  7. Or something even more elaborate.

  8. Or this

  9. Happy Derpday, Sean!

  10. Did you get your test results, Leon?

    Yes. 10x normal number (217M), 50% motility, 18% morphology.

    I’m as fertile as a river delta in Springtime. Ovulating women should not stand too close to me or sit in my lap unless they are interested in motherhood.

  11. Is your real name Sean?

  12. No. Somehow in spite of my incredible fertility, I’ve not managed to acquire any babymommas.

  13. I don’t do restaurant work, I should put out an ad on Backpage or something.

  14. So are you still on a coffee restricted status?

  15. I had cut it back for a week before the test, for all I know it made the difference in the morphology. I really was drinking way too much of it, so I’ll keep it to 1-2 cups for the foreseeable future. I am getting to sleep a lot earlier, so it’s not all bad.

  16. *read’s Leon’s comments through a shower curtain, for safety*

    Goomerman.

    Off to school.

  17. That would have improved that movie immensely.

  18. *read’s Leon’s comments through a shower curtain, for safety*

    It’s for the best, really, I’d hate to have to visit CT to see my kid.

  19. wakey wakey

  20. Blerg.

  21. *puts on hazmat suit for Leon’s post and comments

  22. Michelle needs 70 people to travel with her?

    WE’RE GOING TO NEED MORE LOBSTER!!!!

  23. It really should be the other way around. We need protection from them.

  24. Obama is out of the country too.

  25. It confuses me when you mix in so many dudes. Ok, tuckers in order:

    Booty shorts
    Veiny Arm
    Merica (sheesh)
    Sandy Beach is a mannequin
    Strapless
    Monochrome’s name is Chuck
    Focused Monochrome is his brother
    Ginger

  26. Good morning, peeples.

    Happy Birthday Sean!

  27. It’s a trick, Wavey Dave: they’re ALL tuckers.

  28. Someone should take Leon aside and espain some things to him. Really

  29. Poor HotBride had to have her new kitty put to sleep yesterday.

    Free cats evidently come with a whole host of free viruses sometimes.

  30. That’s awful, please tell her I was sorry to hear of it. We almost lost Klaus very early, too. He had an intestinal thing that almost killed him.

  31. Oh, no…how terrible. Please extend my condolences.

  32. Sorry, Hotspur. Are you sure it wasn’t a ritual sacrifice/witchcraft thing?

  33. It’s a little early for this, but ……….

    Cyn?

  34. Thanks guys.

    Her criteria was that she wanted a black cat under a year old, and no claws. Thimble was all of these.

    For some reason most cats don’t like me. Thimble seemed to. Now it’s probably more likely that she was too sick to care.

  35. That is just horrible news.

  36. My neighbor has free kittens every now and then if you’re interested. He had to add “Black” to the sign because I guess people would stop, see a bunch of black kittens, and then be racist.

    Barn cat descendants, but if you socialize them early they’re okay.

  37. Leon, I’m sure she would be interested. Next time your neighbor has a litter, give me a holler.

  38. Will do.

  39. Oh damn, so sorry to hear about Thimble, HS. Hugs to you and Hotbride.

  40. regret, shame, and remorse

    Being Catholic. You’re doing it right. Now add a heaping dose of guilt.

  41. I’m sorry about Thimble, hotspur. Poor kitteh.

  42. Beasn, most of the regret and remorse is purely secular.

  43. Sorry about Thimble, HS.

  44. Poor Thimble.

    Hugs to Hotbride.

    At least the little guy had a friendly home for a bit.

  45. most of the regret and remorse is purely secular

    Pope says your doing it wrong.

  46. No, I’m okay, my shame is almost exclusively sectarian.

  47. DG says, “Even when I don’t feel well, I can still give you a smile.”

    DebraSmiles

  48. This is something that would happen to me.

  49. Happy she’s doing well MCPO. I’m still a little bummed that her hair laid down.

    Sorry HS.

  50. Morning all

  51. Why is it so hard for me to put together a bill? As soon as I send it, I’ll get paid, but I keep procrastinating this stupid job. I should have had it done yesterday.

  52. G’morn, jenn

  53. Happy birthday, Sean. (Not Sean’s Penis.)

  54. SeanM – Happy Birthday! Try not to DIAF today. Thank you and good luck.

  55. Hi Jenn.

    Jazz, I don’t have to bill other than to fill out my time sheets with justification of the hours and expenses. I do however have to write proposals which I totally hate and procrastinate on.

    I tend to undervalue my services which is usually a bad thing.

  56. So glad DG is feeling better 🙂

  57. Cyn – If she is good with the atomizer, she gets an M&M. That girl loves her some M&Ms! 🙂

  58. Cyn – If she is good with the atomizer, she gets an M&M. That girl loves her some M&Ms! 🙂

    Haaahahahah! The power of positive re-enforcement training.

    That’s outstanding. I’m glad she’s on the mend Chief.

  59. I tend to undervalue my services which is usually a bad thing.

    I both undervalue my services and underbill my clients. I also take clients that couldn’t afford me otherwise.

  60. Yeah, it’s probably good that I’m not a sole proprietorship or I’d be eating sod.

  61. So it appears 40 years in the future Obama is still President and Detroit is still a lovely place to live https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fiA6sVKLlgo

  62. That trailer looks pretty good.

  63. Sean!
    http://is.gd/EuNVQm

  64. Camel toe is so gross:

    http://is.gd/i7O51G

  65. Hi, Jenn – long time, no see! ♥♥♥

    So glad that DG is feeling well enough to smile, Chief 🙂

    Sorry to hear about HotBride’s kitty, HS – was it distemper, by any chance?

    It’s been over 40 years, but I STILL remember my mother weeping when a litter of our kittens came down with that. She was the one who took them to the vet to see what was wrong; came home with no kittens.

    Hope you guys are able to find another one really soon – I bet you can find one that likes you, too!

  66. Oh, and Happy Birthday, Sean! ♥♥♥

  67. Greetings, Ho Hos and Ding Dongs.

  68. Yeah it has been a long time Teresa. I had to reduce my online presence for awhile. Good to be back though.

  69. Happy Birfday, Sean.

    http://tinyurl.com/ler7yly

  70. Had Mr. TiFW’s truck towed to the house last night to assess the damage.

    Busted radiator, crumpled hood and fenders, both headlights are toast, bumper is beyond repair. Thankfully, both doors still open, so he thinks there may be minimal-to-no damage to the frame itself.

    DD#3 doesn’t know it yet, but she will be sharing the cost of the repairs and the (we’re sure) increase in insurance. Either she was way too close to the vehicle in front of her or she wasn’t paying attention to the road (or both).

    Shoulda, coulda, woulda…..

  71. Greetings, Ho Hos and Ding Dongs.

    Great – now I’m hungry for a snack cake. Thanks. THANKS A LOT.

  72. Glad to hear DD3 was unhurt.

  73. Got this just for you, Sean:

    http://is.gd/hNvjwf

  74. Thanks for the birfday wishes and pics and such, guys. 38 consecutive years of not dying is a new personal best for me.

  75. Grats, Sean. We’re the same age again.

  76. Sorry to hear about the kitteh, Hotspur.

  77. Glad to hear DD3 was unhurt.

    Thanks, Cyn – we are very grateful!

    The thing that we always forget about car design is that so much of the “exterior” nowadays is made to absorb the energy of the impact in order to protect the driver.

    We keep having to remind ourselves that all of that nasty damage that we are bitching about having to get fixed is what kept her from getting hurt.

    Hopefully all of that adrenaline has had a chance to work its way out of her body – she sounded pretty shaken up last night.

    She’s staying with some friends this week – the mother of one of them just got the news that her cancer is back with a vengeance, and they have basically told her she has less than a month left.

    DD#3 wanted to be there to give her friend moral support – his family was shocked by the news, and he is (of course) not taking it well.

  78. Sorry to hear about your daughter’s accident. Trucks are replaceable.

  79. Um, HS, your constructions guys may need a little extra supervision today.

  80. Some advice for the Birthday Boy: http://i.imgur.com/4YtGfsA.jpg

  81. Happy Birthday Sean, I got you one of these:

  82. Cyn, that guy should send the girl a picture of Sean’s Penis.

  83. Happy Birthday Sean, I got you one of these:
    http://i.imgur.com/NXbBDYc.gif

    Oh, sure, that’s all well and good, but I bet yours can’t do this:
    http://i.imgur.com/qoLljeO.gif?1

  84. Cyn, that guy should send the girl a picture of Sean’s Penis.

    Wedding invites are sure to follow.

  85. but I bet yours can’t do this

    Well, no…not exactly.

  86. Happy Birthday, Sean.

  87. Wedding invites are sure to follow.

    He can’t afford them, ever since he lost the refund check.

    Do check the paper for a birth announcement soon.

  88. Good Lord, Cyn – warn a girl, wouldja?

    Now I have to clean Coke spew off of my keyboard and screen…. 🙂

  89. Just relistening to Radiobud’s show and heard DiT’s joke… hahahahaha!

  90. Warning? WARNING?? Pfffft.

    This ain’t IB ya know 😉

  91. Carbs anyone? Burger time!

  92. I really like carbs but I can’t eat them without problems. Should I send them a picture of Sean’s Penis?

  93. I’d like a burger please! Crazy flipping day here, just got to the bathroom for the first time at 130. Normally I like to spend more quality time in there with the H2.

  94. In only appropriate ways of course.

  95. MMM and a bathroom?

    I hope you have locking stalls.

  96. Jay, your seeds have not yet sprouted. I am starting to worry.

  97. They took 2-3 weeks for me, with a heating pad.

  98. The bathrooms here are twice the size of the full bathroom at home. And there’s no shower or vanity. Just a single toilet and a baby changing table. The toilet paper sucks: single ply thin stuff on those huge rolls that don’t turn well.

    1. Pull
    2. Tear
    3. Curse
    etc, etc, etc

  99. gross

  100. Jay, your seeds have not yet sprouted. I am starting to worry.

    This statement takes on a subtle change when view in light of your test results comment.

  101. AD, youre a sick man.

    As willie nelson said, on the road again!

  102. If they were my seeds, this would be a different story.

  103. DG?

  104. AD, youre a sick man.

    And proud of it.

  105. This statement takes on a subtle change when view in light of your test results comment.

    *up twinkles*

  106. Jimbro – You got a bucket of sand for your moose limb patients?

  107. *runs through the blog screaming*

    My daughter has been accepted into grad school!!!

    They emailed her acceptance TWO WEEKS AGO to her yahoo account instead of her school account. Yahoo spammed it. She didn’t know until they emailed her again this morning.

    The last two weeks have been so stressful. And we sat her down to discuss her options this past week which was her spring break. Had she been a little proactive – as in bug the shit out of them every other day until someone gave up their spot (she was #1 on wait list)……..but whatever now. She’s in!!! No more tears in the immediate future. It’s all good.

  108. Yay, Beasnette!!!

  109. Way to go, Beasnette! Now, about that third mortgage on Casa de Beasn. . .

  110. >> No more tears in the immediate future

    I like how you padded that with a little reality. Congrats to your kid.

  111. Hooray for Beasnsnsettes!

  112. Congrats to the Beasn family. What’s she studying?

    Now you’re off to sell a kidney and a couple pints of blood.

  113. For the love of Heaven, do not borrow money from Sallie Mae.

  114. Use Leon’s name.

  115. Yes, by all means, borrow money as Leon Caruthers.

    My SSN is 123 45 6789 and my DOB is 1-1-69.

  116. I had a friend that took out student loans until she was in her late twenties and never attended school. I think she signed up, but dropped classes or something.

    Either way, she never paid the loans back either. Partied like a rockstar too.

  117. You were friends with Michelle Obama?

  118. Thanks you all!!

    She gets her BS this May. No debt, has a little money in the bank. She was able to hold on to her campus job, which pays for her room and board, so we only have to worry about tuition for two more years. She will have to find out if her scholarship stays with her for a fourth year (she’s getting her undergraduate a year early) or if it disappears on completion of the undergraduate degree.

    Admiral Ackbar, her field of study – communication disorders.
    Btw, who are you and have you been properly screened the H2 way?

  119. Just tried to call my mortgage company – mis-dialed the last digit. Got a phone sex company.

    Want the number, xbrad?

  120. who are you and have you been properly screened the H2 way?

    Don’t answer – It’s a trap!

  121. No way in hell would we do Sallie Mae. If the kids need a loan, we’ll be their bank and draw up a contract.

    *momentarily considers scott’s advice*

  122. The fraud method used on me won’t work anymore, in case you were curious.

  123. She can do her thesis on our blog.

  124. >>>Bucket of sand for your moose limb patients?

    Not yet. ACA probably mandates that somewhere though.

  125. Gah, Mon Calamari sock off!

  126. The fraud method used on me won’t work anymore, in case you were curious.

    *closes Sallie Mae loan application tab in browser and sulks off*

  127. Oh shit…she will have to do a thesis?

    *starts to prepare for more tears*

  128. Won’t work on me in particular, and they are completely aware of this method now. There’s no way you’d get the loan today with as little data as they had for me.

  129. *fills out application to attend beasnette’s school….fills in desire to be on her floor*

    This is going to be great! She will love that.

    *laughs maniacally*

  130. Yeah, every millennial wants their Mom in the dorm, doncha know?

  131. Yeah, every millennial wants their Mom in the dorm, doncha know?

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/09/11/parent-job-interview_n_3907447.html

  132. Monday Fish

  133. Monday’s suck. Let’s make it Tuesday and be done with it.

  134. We are doomed.

  135. Afternoon Hostages.

    Wtf is so hard for doctor’s offices and pharmacies about getting prescriptions right?

    Also, the first chick is actually a chick, the rest are clearly dudes.

  136. Actually, we’re fine.

    They’re doomed.

  137. Tuesday is Soylent Green Day.

  138. You are supposed to bring your parents when you go to the pharmacy.

  139. Time to go earn Michelle a few more lobsters.

  140. And don’t skimp on the drawn butter this time.

    Chop chop.

  141. They’re doomed.

    Yes, but they’ll take you down with them.

  142. Work hard so they can get the poo poo platter too, Scottw.

  143. *view from inside babybeanseses dorm room*

  144. Work hard Scott, braised daschund doesn’t come cheap.

  145. Yay! Only eight more hours until I can go home and enjoy the last hour of my birfday!

  146. Hooray for Beasnette!!!!!

  147. Just spent a few hours culling through the mess that is Rebecca’s playroom.

    Can’t even tell that I was in there.

    Somebody slide something cold down the bar…..

  148. Here you go, TiFW.

    http://tinyurl.com/llel8dq

  149. Happy birthday Sean.

    You kick ass.

  150. Hey again all. Damn I have only been doing this internet thing again for less than a day and I am already exhausted.

  151. Thanks, MJ. And everybody else, too.

  152. Diet Dr. Pepper? Nah, here ya go TiFW….

    http://tinyurl.com/n62ufjt

    Not cold exactly, but it’ll work.

  153. And happy bday Sean!

  154. Happy Birthday Sean

  155. Pups, you can see grass in your yard now? Dayum, I still have a foot plus of white hate out there.

  156. “grass”

    Nessie tears up huge junks of sod just running around, but yeah…we’ve been snow free for a couple of weeks, it’s snowed a few times in March but hasn’t stuck around.

  157. Good evening, bullwhip enthusiasts.

  158. We may get freezing rain.

    FU.

  159. Evenin nice peoples

  160. Yeah, the weather is turning nasty here too. I mean, it might only be a high of mid/upper 50s on Wednesday.

  161. Evening.

  162. Evening. Anything cool today?

  163. Today I built two (2) of these:

    http://tinyurl.com/mbq62sp

    and one (1) of these:

    http://tinyurl.com/bm49fw2

  164. Really long carpeted hallway + stupid dog + tennis ball = fun.

    Video for BBF.

  165. I would love some freezing rain! That would certainly warm things up a bit around here!

  166. Jewstin, I thought you were supposed to put the bodies in freezers not hotboxes.

  167. AgileDog?

  168. Today, I built five (1) of these:

    http://tinyurl.com/lzdntg4

    and 673,599 (2 3/8) of these:

    http://tinyurl.com/lrj3rbg

  169. The heated ones aren’t so good for bodies, but the transit-trays are good for shuttling them around.

  170. Is there anything funnier than waking a dog up by pressing a corn chip to his nose? I think not.

    *laughs while Bubba composes himself*

  171. I would love some freezing rain! That would certainly warm things up a bit around here!
    ————————————–
    *mails lauraw a bonfire

  172. It’s dipped down to 70 here, so we turned on the fireplace.

  173. Nipply!

  174. :-P“““` at xbrad. I need to move south

  175. JTFC: How fucking hard is it for a supplier to get an order right, after you’ve warned them that this is their last freaking opportunity to keep your business?! Day-um.

  176. The economy is obviously recovering so fucking hard that they don’t need your business, Cyn.

  177. Corn chip on a dogs nose? Hmmm….

    *where’s Moses?*

    Also apparently the guy who took the video of that dust devil bombing a controlled burn in CO is a moron and he sent me some stuff about so I posted that. Because Firenado is both funny and horrifying at the same time. Like clowns except funny too.

  178. The economy is obviously recovering so fucking hard

    ^ This ^

    They apparently don’t need my (and my insurance company’s) $12.5K per year.

    *spits*

    Assholery!

  179. So who wants to hear my garden report? I’ve been busy.

  180. The ‘oh shit’ moment at the beginning of that firenado video (where the tumbleweeds all seem to catch fire just out of frame while the other guys have their backs turned) is really something else. It happened so quickly.

  181. Cool video. It’s cool because it presents absolutely no danger to me. And controlled burns are inherently dangerous, but not as dangerous as allowing all the undergrowth.

  182. Garden report. Give.

  183. No, really guys, I’m happy to tell you all the fun sowing and planting and stuff that I have been up to. In detail. Including cultivar names.

  184. Yeah the only thing worse than a controlled burn is an uncontrolled one.

    That and maybe being eaten by a walrus.

  185. *GASP*

  186. We had some massive wildfires here in Florida about 15 years or so ago. Unbelievable the amount that was burned. All the way up to the ocean. You could drive down A1A and see burned patches for damn near a decade.

  187. *runs around in circles*
    omg omg he wants to hear this, really?
    Where do I begin???
    Leeks, of course. Leeks and onions. About five inches tall now, and sturdy. Almost transplant size. Soon! YAY!

    The Geezers sent me some different heirloom tomato seeds…hold on, I have to collect my thoughts.

  188. *cues up an episode of DWTS*

    Go on honey, with the seeds and the dirt stuff. I’m listening

  189. Ok whoa there cowgirl, what’s leaking? Is this because of the snow?

  190. BC, 3 summers ago when Bastrop went up in flames I was so worried I asked both my daughters to stay with us for a week (there were 400+ fires and all close to them).

    .,.

    Yeah that week was a bitch.

  191. Firenado is a good reminder of the fact that Mother Nature is not our friend. She is in fact an angry bitch who will try to kill you with flaming sky-tumbleweeds.

  192. Think about that. With years of meticulous planning, a controlled burn went sideways in seconds. But we’re going to predict and influence the global climate for years, decades, centuries to come.

    Riiiiiiiight.

  193. Drove through Bastrop last month
    Still pretty grim looking out there

  194. Garden Report. You were warned, fuckers. This is your warning. I’m talking gardening now. Assume your various insulting poses of boredom. I’m not going to stop. Blame Dave. He’s evil and lovin’ it.

    I’m trying this Winter gardening technique here in the last weeks of cold weather, but I wish I had heard about it in January, or I would surely have saved more containers and had more things started by now: http://www.agardenforthehouse.com/2014/01/your-2014-winter-sowing-project/

    So I have some lacinato kale and a couple other things I don’t remember, started in little greenhouse containers out on a bench in the backyard right now.

    So far these things have been sown indoors:

    *Leeks and onions

    And, I said I wasn’t going to bother with tomatoes this year again, but that is just impossible. You can’t have a northeastern garden without the obligatory blighted patch of horribly dying tomatoes. So, I sowed these indoors too:

    *heirloom Oxheart tomatoes (seeds from my old UPS guy’s former old Italian neighbor). These ones–> http://michaelscomments.wordpress.com/2007/09/03/tomato-report/

    *three other kinds of heirloom tomato seeds given to me by Retired Geezer & Mrs. Geezer

    *’Yummy’ mini-bell pepper

    *hot red cherry pepper

    And there’s two bags of yukon gold and russet seed potatoes, pre-sprouting in the kitchen for planting next month.

    And these things have been sown outdoors:

    Sugarsnap peas
    Spinach
    sprouting broccoli
    bok choi
    mache
    claytonia

    Yeah. I threw those seeds right on the ringing-hard frozen ground. Bagged dirt as a topping. It was very exciting and…ok, you can all stop pretending to be dead now. I’m not sorry. God, I hate you all so much.

    Just look away and pretend this never happened.

  195. *blacks out*

  196. Remember I fell in love with those little japanese summer turnips last year? Well I am trying out a new japanese veggie this Summer, too. Komatsuna. Some kind of green that is like a cross between spinach and bok choy, but more weather-tolerant than both.

    So. That’s gonna be pretty cool.

  197. *wakes up*

    *looks around*

    Oh God! It’s still happening!!

    *blacks out again*

  198. >> Blame Dave. He’s evil and lovin’ it.

    Yes I am. And yes I am.

    Do go on.

  199. Hakurei. Hakurei turnips. Tiny little white ones. Outstanding. The perfect garden item.

  200. Garden Report. You were warned, fuckers. This is your warning. I’m talking gardening now. Assume your various insulting poses of boredom. I’m not going to stop. Blame Dave. He’s evil and lovin’ it.

    I’m trying this Winter gardening technique here in the last weeks of cold weather, but I wish I had heard about it in January, or I would surely have saved more containers and had more things started by now: http://www.agardenforthehouse.com/2014/01/your-2014-winter-sowing-project/

    So I have some lacinato kale and a couple other things I don’t remember, started in little greenhouse containers out on a bench in the backyard right now.

    So far these things have been sown indoors:

    *Leeks and onions

    And, I said I wasn’t going to bother with tomatoes this year again, but that is just impossible. You can’t have a northeastern garden without the obligatory blighted patch of horribly dying tomatoes. So, I sowed these indoors too:

    *heirloom Oxheart tomatoes (seeds from my old UPS guy’s former old Italian neighbor). These ones–> http://michaelscomments.wordpress.com/2007/09/03/tomato-report/

    *three other kinds of heirloom tomato seeds given to me by Retired Geezer & Mrs. Geezer

    *’Yummy’ mini-bell pepper

    *hot red cherry pepper

    And there’s two bags of yukon gold and russet seed potatoes, pre-sprouting in the kitchen for planting next month.

    And these things have been sown outdoors:

    Sugarsnap peas
    Spinach
    sprouting broccoli
    bok choi
    mache
    claytonia

    Yeah. I threw those seeds right on the ringing-hard frozen ground. Bagged dirt as a topping. It was very exciting and…ok, you can all stop pretending to be dead now. I’m not sorry. God, I hate you all so much.

    Just look away and pretend this never happened.

    ———-

    Ain’t nobody got time for that.

  201. *crawls towards oven*

    Pleeeasseee….someone make it stop. Just turn the oven on. I’ll take care of the rest.

  202. >> claytonia

    There’s a vaccine for that now but it’s a little controversial.

  203. *places a Johnny’s Selected Seeds catalog on bcoch’s prone form*

    For when he wakes up. He’s definitely gonna want to see the picture of the komatsuna. It’s pretty.

  204. Ok. So I actually read the War and Peace of lauraw posts, and it turns out I like all of that stuff.

    But I’m going to pretend to hate it cuz that’s how I roll.

  205. Question for the group, randomness. How many of these nice things that Humpy grows do you think Scott eats?

    Follow up if I may? How many of those do you think he eats willingly and knowingly?

  206. *gives up on way to oven*

    Someone…anyone…just put the gun in my hand.

  207. All of them. Half of them.

  208. MJ.

    http://is.gd/uqNuEU

  209. I did a controlled pan burn once at BASF. Turns out plastics makin’ chemicals are just slightly flammable, and they really, really need to know how to prevent a fire if one happens.

    1. Light giant fire with road flare on a long pole.
    2. Say, ‘wow, that’s hot,’ like a retard.
    3. Put out fire with extinguisher.
    4. Repeat 30 times.
    5. Collect $3000.

  210. First part I believe. Second part no way.

    I’m not trying to be a jerk, just sayin I know her a bit and she is more devious and clever than you think. You see her here where she’s all nice and shit. I’ve gotten The Look™ about a dozen times and let me tell you something, it will chill your shit on the spot.

  211. There is no vaccine for claytonia, and no known cure.

    *scratches

  212. Laura, the fucked up messages on candy hearts thread came up in an email with an Ette today. I think you had a big hand in that one, right? Best. Thread. Ever.

  213. You had me up until ‘willingly and knowingly.’

  214. Garden Report. You were warned, fuckers. This is your warning. I’m talking gardening now. Assume your various insulting poses of boredom. I’m not going to stop. Blame Dave. He’s evil and lovin’ it.

    I’m trying this Winter gardening technique here in the last weeks of cold weather, but I wish I had heard about it in January, or I would surely have saved more containers and had more things started by now: http://www.agardenforthehouse.com/2014/01/your-2014-winter-sowing-project/

    So I have some lacinato kale and a couple other things I don’t remember, started in little greenhouse containers out on a bench in the backyard right now.

    So far these things have been sown indoors:

    *Leeks and onions

    And, I said I wasn’t going to bother with tomatoes this year again, but that is just impossible. You can’t have a northeastern garden without the obligatory blighted patch of horribly dying tomatoes. So, I sowed these indoors too:

    *heirloom Oxheart tomatoes (seeds from my old UPS guy’s former old Italian neighbor). These ones–> http://michaelscomments.wordpress.com/2007/09/03/tomato-report/

    *three other kinds of heirloom tomato seeds given to me by Retired Geezer & Mrs. Geezer

    *’Yummy’ mini-bell pepper

    *hot red cherry pepper

    And there’s two bags of yukon gold and russet seed potatoes, pre-sprouting in the kitchen for planting next month.

    And these things have been sown outdoors:

    Sugarsnap peas
    Spinach
    sprouting broccoli
    bok choi
    mache
    claytonia

    Yeah. I threw those seeds right on the ringing-hard frozen ground. Bagged dirt as a topping. It was very exciting and…ok, you can all stop pretending to be dead now. I’m not sorry. God, I hate you all so much.

    Just look away and pretend this never happened.
    <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

    Can you grow hops?

  215. I LOVE tomatoes. I eat one almost everyday.

    In Illinois, I swear they were better than Florida or other places where they are commercially grown. Down there (ha!) they are picked when green and ripen on the commute to your local grocery store.

    In your backyard they ripen on the vine and that lets the sugars develop. Or so my Uncle Mike told me.

  216. I did an uncontrolled burn while turning aluminum on a lathe in an acetone stream.

  217. Oh fuck you xbra……*blacks out yet again*

  218. *casually cuts bcoch in half with a chainsaw

  219. There MAY have been an uncontrolled burn involving a lighter, lighter fluid and my finger. And my then girlfriend now wife calling me a “stupid ass redneck” in front of my parents.

  220. I do not remember that, bcoch. Sounds like something I would do, but not really sure that was me.

  221. Oh sweet baby Jesus. The relief of the Void. Thank you MJ.

  222. Wait…twitter? Was it a twitter thing, or an AOSHQ thread?

  223. Ha! Found it. And you definitely contributed Laura.

    http://ace.mu.nu/archives/337557.php

  224. Comment by lauraw on March 24, 2014 9:03 pm
    Garden Report. You were warned, fuckers. This is your warning. I’m talking gardening now. Assume your various insulting poses of boredom. I’m not going to stop. Blame Dave. He’s evil and lovin’ it.
    I’m trying this Winter gardening technique here in the last weeks of cold weather, but I wish I had heard about it in January, or I would surely have saved more containers and had more things started by now: http://www.agardenforthehouse.com/2014/01/your-2014-winter-sowing-project/
    So I have some lacinato kale and a couple other things I don’t remember, started in little greenhouse containers out on a bench in the backyard right now.
    So far these things have been sown indoors:
    *Leeks and onions
    And, I said I wasn’t going to bother with tomatoes this year again, but that is just impossible. You can’t have a northeastern garden without the obligatory blighted patch of horribly dying tomatoes. So, I sowed these indoors too:
    *heirloom Oxheart tomatoes (seeds from my old UPS guy’s former old Italian neighbor). These ones–> http://michaelscomments.wordpress.com/2007/09/03/tomato-report/
    *three other kinds of heirloom tomato seeds given to me by Retired Geezer & Mrs. Geezer
    *’Yummy’ mini-bell pepper
    *hot red cherry pepper
    And there’s two bags of yukon gold and russet seed potatoes, pre-sprouting in the kitchen for planting next month.
    And these things have been sown outdoors:
    Sugarsnap peas
    Spinach
    sprouting broccoli
    bok choi
    mache
    claytonia
    Yeah. I threw those seeds right on the ringing-hard frozen ground. Bagged dirt as a topping. It was very exciting and…ok, you can all stop pretending to be dead now. I’m not sorry. God, I hate you all so much.
    Just look away and pretend this never happened.
    ==========
    First.

  225. Comment by lauraw on March 24, 2014 9:03 pm
    Garden Report. You were warned, fuckers. This is your warning. I’m talking gardening now. Assume your various insulting poses of boredom. I’m not going to stop. Blame Dave. He’s evil and lovin’ it.
    I’m trying this Winter gardening technique here in the last weeks of cold weather, but I wish I had heard about it in January, or I would surely have saved more containers and had more things started by now: http://www.agardenforthehouse.com/2014/01/your-2014-winter-sowing-project/
    So I have some lacinato kale and a couple other things I don’t remember, started in little greenhouse containers out on a bench in the backyard right now.
    So far these things have been sown indoors:
    *Leeks and onions
    And, I said I wasn’t going to bother with tomatoes this year again, but that is just impossible. You can’t have a northeastern garden without the obligatory blighted patch of horribly dying tomatoes. So, I sowed these indoors too:
    *heirloom Oxheart tomatoes (seeds from my old UPS guy’s former old Italian neighbor). These ones–> http://michaelscomments.wordpress.com/2007/09/03/tomato-report/
    *three other kinds of heirloom tomato seeds given to me by Retired Geezer & Mrs. Geezer
    *’Yummy’ mini-bell pepper
    *hot red cherry pepper
    And there’s two bags of yukon gold and russet seed potatoes, pre-sprouting in the kitchen for planting next month.
    And these things have been sown outdoors:
    Sugarsnap peas
    Spinach
    sprouting broccoli
    bok choi
    mache
    claytonia
    Yeah. I threw those seeds right on the ringing-hard frozen ground. Bagged dirt as a topping. It was very exciting and…ok, you can all stop pretending to be dead now. I’m not sorry. God, I hate you all so much.
    Just look away and pretend this never happened.
    ========
    Shit

  226. I have almost grown hops several times, but I don’t make beer anymore, so why bother.

  227. Did anybody decide to seek the death penalty against anybody else today?

  228. Garden Report. You were warned, fuckers. This is your warning. I’m talking gardening now. Assume your various insulting poses of boredom. I’m not going to stop. Blame Dave. He’s evil and lovin’ it.

    I’m trying this Winter gardening technique here in the last weeks of cold weather, but I wish I had heard about it in January, or I would surely have saved more containers and had more things started by now: http://www.agardenforthehouse.com/2014/01/your-2014-winter-sowing-project/

    So I have some lacinato kale and a couple other things I don’t remember, started in little greenhouse containers out on a bench in the backyard right now.

    So far these things have been sown indoors:

    *Leeks and onions

    And, I said I wasn’t going to bother with tomatoes this year again, but that is just impossible. You can’t have a northeastern garden without the obligatory blighted patch of horribly dying tomatoes. So, I sowed these indoors too:

    *heirloom Oxheart tomatoes (seeds from my old UPS guy’s former old Italian neighbor). These ones–> http://michaelscomments.wordpress.com/2007/09/03/tomato-report/

    *three other kinds of heirloom tomato seeds given to me by Retired Geezer & Mrs. Geezer

    *’Yummy’ mini-bell pepper

    *hot red cherry pepper

    And there’s two bags of yukon gold and russet seed potatoes, pre-sprouting in the kitchen for planting next month.

    And these things have been sown outdoors:

    Sugarsnap peas
    Spinach
    sprouting broccoli
    bok choi
    mache
    claytonia

    Yeah. I threw those seeds right on the ringing-hard frozen ground. Bagged dirt as a topping. It was very exciting and…ok, you can all stop pretending to be dead now. I’m not sorry. God, I hate you all so much.

    Just look away and pretend this never happened.

    Well, I’ll be goddamned.

  229. Did anybody decide to seek the death penalty against anybody else today?

    Seek? No. Execute without due process? Maybe.

  230. Man, that mudslide in Oso, WA is some shit.

  231. That’s about half an hour east of where I grew up.

    http://tinyurl.com/opb6pu3

  232. *mutters something*

  233. Garden Report. You were warned, fuckers. This is your warning. I’m talking gardening now. Assume your various insulting poses of boredom. I’m not going to stop. Blame Dave. He’s evil and lovin’ it.

    I’m trying this Winter gardening technique here in the last weeks of cold weather, but I wish I had heard about it in January, or I would surely have saved more containers and had more things started by now: http://www.agardenforthehouse.com/2014/01/your-2014-winter-sowing-project/

    So I have some lacinato kale and a couple other things I don’t remember, started in little greenhouse containers out on a bench in the backyard right now.

    So far these things have been sown indoors:

    *Leeks and onions

    And, I said I wasn’t going to bother with tomatoes this year again, but that is just impossible. You can’t have a northeastern garden without the obligatory blighted patch of horribly dying tomatoes. So, I sowed these indoors too:

    *heirloom Oxheart tomatoes (seeds from my old UPS guy’s former old Italian neighbor). These ones–> http://michaelscomments.wordpress.com/2007/09/03/tomato-report/

    *three other kinds of heirloom tomato seeds given to me by Retired Geezer & Mrs. Geezer

    *’Yummy’ mini-bell pepper

    *hot red cherry pepper

    And there’s two bags of yukon gold and russet seed potatoes, pre-sprouting in the kitchen for planting next month.

    And these things have been sown outdoors:

    Sugarsnap peas
    Spinach
    sprouting broccoli
    bok choi
    mache
    claytonia

    Yeah. I threw those seeds right on the ringing-hard frozen ground. Bagged dirt as a topping. It was very exciting and…ok, you can all stop pretending to be dead now. I’m not sorry. God, I hate you all so much.

    Just look away and pretend this never happened.

    ———-

    Not even close, peps.

  234. anyone here watch any of the amazon original series? I started Betas and 5 minutes in so frustrated I feel like scrotums over peoples heads.

  235. Do you have any other seeds ready for May?

  236. *like pulling*

  237. ow

  238. first I’ve heard of the mudslide. Looks like a major cluster. That’s one thing we dont’ worry about west of the 98th parallel.

  239. I watered my neighbors onions today while he was out of town.

    **pats self on back for being able to contribute to garden blog**

  240. I watched the Amazon pilot for Bosch. I liked it. But then I really liked the books.

  241. I’m watching “Hemlock Grove” on Netflix.

  242. No, Dave. Not yet. I will be planting more in a week or so, though.

    STAY TUNED! Yaaayyyy!!

  243. I enjoyed “Hemlock Grove”, but there’s a sexually violent scene late in the series that seemed a little gratuitous to me.

  244. Supernatural on Netflix.

  245. I watched Bosch too. It was good and it got picked up for a full season.

  246. didn’t see hemlock grove, but since archer and justified are the only things worthwhile on regular tv i am working my way thru the amazon stuff.

  247. My ass pipes in on gardening and the conversation immedietly turns to tv watching. In which I got nuthin’. I see how it is.

  248. >> No, Dave. Not yet. I will be planting more in a week or so, though

    You go.

    ALSO hey Jenn.

  249. Give Rick and Morty on Cartoon Network a try, jenn. It’s the best new series on cable, and I’ve been recommending that show to everybody I can.

  250. Laura,
    Our house is FULL of trays of seedlings. They are in the garden-windows, on tables in front of the east windows, in the old “kitty-house”, on heating-pads, of the coffee-table, every fuckin’ where. The odd thing about that is that are ALL for the childrens-garden at Anitas’ church, as we are not having a garden this year.
    I will try to grow a few tomatoes in pots on the deck, where the critters can not get them.
    So it goes…

  251. That slide started on the local “news” as a couple setting in their house getting swept across the highway.
    Then, it really got going:

    http://www.komonews.com/news/local/No-signs-of-life-after-huge-landslide-near-Oso-251927321.html

    It’s very ugly, now…

  252. That is a terrifying catastrophe, Crispy. Can’t quite get my mind around it. Heartbreaking that they heard calls for help last night, then nothing today.

  253. i’ll check out rick and morty

  254. Vegetables suck.

  255. This is kind of interesting:

    http://tinyurl.com/mhs88av

  256. Vegetables suck.

    Yes, but are they a scam?

  257. Am I the only person who didn’t like The Breakfast Club?

    I liked most other Hughes films. Just not that one.

  258. *writes out a detention slip to Sean*

    Saturday morning. Be there.

  259. Not my favorite, but I didn’t dislike it.

  260. Laura,
    Yeah, but the soil is so loose that their neighbors that try to go and look for them can end-up shoulder-deep in mud.
    The rescue folks are actually using hover-craft to ride over the mud and water.
    If they step out of them, they will sink. It’s pretty bad for everyone involved.

  261. I liked it, but only about 10 years after it came out.

  262. That mud slide is just awful and my heart goes out to those folks. Seems as tho it’s going to be worse than the Mt. Saint Helen’s so long ago now.

  263. Am I the only person who didn’t like The Breakfast Club?

    Nope, hated that movie.

  264. Molly Ringwald was a pig.

  265. ‘Sixteen Candles’ was and is lame. Except for Long Duck Dong, that was some funny shit.

  266. Okay, the thing with the panties was kinda funny.

  267. I never understood the Molly RIngwald thing.

  268. Breakfast Club.

    I pretty much couldn’t stand any of the snots in the Brat Pack.

    Mostly because I was working my ass off and raising two baby girls. I just did not get their emotey emotions.

    It wasn’t hatey or nothing. I just didn’t care.

  269. For Lauraw, because I loves: http://i.lvme.me/bxha1s1.jpg

  270. I just did not get their emotey emotions.

    Well, of course not. You’re a robot.

  271. Brook Shields too.

    Likely a tucker.

  272. Best Hughes movies would have to be ties between “Ferris Bueller”, and “P,T, & A”, with “Mr. Mom” a second place.

  273. Brook Shields too.

    Likely a tucker.

    You say that like there is something wrong with it.

  274. Mr. Mom.

    220., 221, whatever it takes.

  275. You can’t give chili to a baby!

    At my eldest daughter’s first bday party, there was a friend of the family who was walking around feeding little spoonfuls of chili to her granddaughter. Who had just turned one.

  276. Cyn, I actually do that.

    Some years if they were stored outdoors by accident I just throw the damn things away.

  277. Brooke Shields eyebrows could kick the crap out of John Bolton’s mustache.

  278. Woobie!

  279. Some years if they were stored outdoors by accident I just throw the damn things away.

    Yep; we have to do that stomping thing with stuff even inside the house. Great: Now I have given myself the heebie jeebies.

  280. I wanted to like Brooke Shields’ sitcom, but it was simply awful, and unfunny.

    Plus, Kathy Griffin.

  281. I just get new gloves at the dollar store.

  282. Even the mention of Kathy Griffin’s name just makes me dry heave. How on Earth did she get to where she is today??

  283. I liked The Breakfast Club
    Except for the sobby confession bullshit

    Watched Sixteen Candles with my kid a couple of months ago

    Forgot that there was some nudity

    Oops..

  284. I guess I didn’t know Mr. Mom was a John Hughes movie. You learn something new every day.

  285. f’n school nights.

    ciao

  286. Every time I watch Pretty In Pink, I think Annie Potts should have given Duckie a handy as a consolation prize.

  287. hi jen
    good to see you again

  288. Wow
    Annie Potts
    That was a name from the past

    Hughes also did NL’s Vacation

    That certainly had some good moments

  289. Also from the mind of John Hughes:

    http://tinyurl.com/l8u86pq

  290. Hey V.

    John Hughes also wrote the story Vacation was based on Vacation ’58. http://www.bizbag.com/Vacation/Vacation%2058.htm

  291. Anyone else thinks Heinrich Himmler and Dave in Texas look similar?

  292. Cyn,
    Meeting XBrad won’t lead to anything good.
    I told you so.

  293. (Owns the John Hughes Collection) RL friend had a massive crush on Molly Ringwald. He even married a ginger. We used to ask people “Who’s your Molly?” Winnie Cooper was the #1 choice of guys of a certain age.

  294. Tushar, Cyn met me long before you did.

  295. Laughing at the HH/DiT pic.

  296. XBrad, I met Cyn in 2009.

  297. Well, then I guess you got me beat by a couple years.

  298. b-rad met me back in 2008 or early 2009, so he’s probably thinking of that.

  299. You and Cyn are practically twins.

  300. Cyn is the only Hostage I’ve met. She’s the best!

  301. 45 minutes left of Sean’s birthday.

  302. Today was my cousin’s birthday.

  303. Her name is Alicia.

  304. She is a breast cancer survivor.

  305. She has 2 little girls.

  306. They were born after her chemo and surgery.

  307. Her hubby is a college football coach.

  308. I can’t remember where he coaches.

  309. They have 2 wiener dogs.

  310. She has 15% motility after lymph surgery.

  311. I gave her my KitchenAid blender, because let’s get real, does anyone think that I cook?

  312. Her hubby was at Sam Houston State when she was diagnosed.

  313. Thank you, RO Anderson.

  314. She credits Blue Bell Ice Cream and JPII for her recovery.

  315. PWNED.

  316. Do you know the way to san jose?

  317. You can’t hurry love.

  318. Pretty sure that the Clintons’ used to pull the same BS travel/Spring Break shit with Chelsea. W and LauraW weren’t about the free travel.

  319. I understand about indecision
    But I don’t care if I get behind
    People livin’ in competition
    All I want is to have my derp of mind.

  320. Birthday boy breaks my streak! Curses!!!!

  321. I’m pretty sure that Russ introduced Jay to the IB back when I was lurking both pages.

  322. Bing Tim’s Place. K. Whew. First time I went in there, I didn’t know that a hug from the owner was the “real deal”. I cringed and wouldn’t hug him. Thought the food was meh and overpriced. Now I feel like an ass. Blah blah blah. Haven’t been back.

  323. I got in a fight with our special needs greeter tonight. Gah.

  324. There can be only one!

  325. You are correct, oso. Russ told a funny story on IB about his visit to the bar I used to work at.

  326. I got in a fight with our special needs greeter tonight. Gah.

    “Special” doesn’t mean “can’t be a dick.” I’ve done a lot of work with special needs folks in the past, and while most are loving and kind, some are manipulative and vindictive a-holes.

  327. I got in a fight with our special needs greeter tonight.

    http://i.imgur.com/qLJGjd3.gif?1

  328. I’m going to do that milk jug thing. I just put a bleg out to my local friends to save them for me.

    I can talk gardening in about a week.

    wakey wakey

  329. The other day, one of my most favoritest cow-orkers at the Obamajerb was upset. So we get to talking…she was angry at another cow-orker who she has been friends with for several years.

    They have been close friends. Cow#2 has been over to Cow#1s house, cried on her shoulder when her brother died, they have been through a lot of stuff together, etc.

    Anyway, so the reason Cow#1 was angry, was that she just found out that Cow#2 is a liar. As in, pathological or compulsive. Has created an entire alternate reality. Has no brothers. Has never had any brothers. Among other things. Many many other things.

    On the same day that I found out about this woman, but it wasn’t top of mind because hey I was working, she told me another family story which very plausibly involved her brother. I was walking away from her, and suddenly it dawned on me and I was like ‘Holy Shit. It happened again.’ She’s amazing. It is very difficult to know that you are listening to yarns.

    I told Cow#1, “You know she’s mentally ill, right?” and she said to me that she is still too angry and fucked up to really process any kind of pity at this moment, but she’ll get there eventually.

    I have only worked there less than a year and I’m sitting here remembering many conversations that I now know to be complete bullshit. Mind. Blown. I think one of her children is a fabrication as well, just based on things she has told me.

    Can’t even imagine what Cow#1 is going through. I barely know this other woman and I’ve been getting mindfucked for the last two days. It’s like my brain has to pull out every thing this person ever told me and reexamine it. And most of it is absolute crap that I’m shocked I believed at the time. What if I had been a seriously close friend and had reams and reams of this false information in my head, popping up like this? Crazy.

    What’s harming me most of all is that I really liked this other lady, we really got along well. And I even thought this about her: “Wow! I finally met a sane redhead.” But, noooop.

  330. Wow. Really lauraw? that is amazing.

    I mean TWO wall of texts from you on the same thread.

    Mind blown.

    [heh- my sil was like that – not lies THAT big, but pretty much everything she ever said was a lie, or lie-tinged, and people did get taken in by her]

  331. Her lies are interesting though, I must say. What does it mean that she is always creating a brother? What do brothers represent to her?

    “I grew up with brothers so…” fill in the blank, this is something that girls who grow up with brothers often say. She says this.

    She is often doting on the brother, or the brother enters one of her stories to help her out in some way.

    And this daughter of hers…she’s amazing. Nine years old, consistently volunteers to help others, takes care of the little kids, loves going to church, plays golf. Yep. She plays golf. Nine years old. And she’s good!

    Just, wow. I am the most gullible idiot in the world.

  332. >> Wow! I finally met a sane redhead.” But, noooop.

    I wonder how many souls she’s stolen?

    Can you count her freckles?

  333. I was talking to my mother about this woman yesterday and in the middle of conversation I would stop, stunned, as I remembered another one of her tales. This is really a very odd experience.

    Dave, did you see the pic Tushar posted in this thread for you?

  334. It’s fucking snowing.

    My sil told lies to make people feel sorry for her, or otherwise manipulate them.

    This lady sounds like she actually has a DSM code.

  335. Molly Ringwald does some jazz singing now. Looking at the interview I think she looks better now than when she was a young actress. But, man oh man, she’s got a mouth full of teeth when she smiles. Guess I never noticed that.

  336. Yeah, she was telling me recently about how she’s getting divorced (she really does have kids- I have seen a couple with her while she was shopping, anyway) and she’s moving in with a girlfriend. She seemed happy. Letting the husband have the house and kids…um, what???

    I don’t know too many women who wouldn’t crawl over broken glass to keep their kids with them.

    For all I know, there is no girlfriend, husband, or house. Who the fuck knows.

  337. Morning, children. FU Worpdress

  338. Molly Ringwald and John Elway are the same person!

  339. Yea, well she’s losing the kids because she’s fucking crazy.

  340. Yeah, I like when people go out of their way to whiten their teeth (not me, too lazy) but there’s some people who may just be better to leave the coffee stains right where they are.

  341. Scott and I are actually arguing about whether Molly Ringwald was a cute kid.

    Jimbro’s link shows her post-facelift. She didn’t look like that just a few years ago. You can kind of see around the sides of her face that it’s been done.

  342. Always never trust a woman who abandons her kids, fictional or real.

  343. She sounds commitable, or at least in need of an intervention and therapy.

  344. Science settled.

  345. https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/2578561536/h7736CDF0/

  346. Does John Kerry have any clue why Uganda banned homosexual acts? They were/are a tourist destination for middle-aged gay guys who wanted to buy time with little boys, and the kids were getting STDs of every stripe, including HIV. Sending a scientist isn’t going to change anything or even address the real issue.

  347. >> Dave, did you see the pic Tushar posted in this thread for you?

    *looks up*

    HEY I’M A NAZI

  348. Sometimes I read about what goes on in Africa and I just think God must hate those people.

    Read a story in the WSJ from last week – about how S. Africa NOTHING has changed, despite Mandela being the greatest person ever. Employment NEVER changed/went up. Unemployment is north of 40%. Clean water for the ghettos? Nope. Crime. Corruption. How can this be the after-affects of the greatest leader ever? Huh.

    Also ironic that they have something like the highest minimum wage in Africa or something. Yea … that has worked great.

  349. Looks like Elway needs a carrot after you adjust his bridle.

  350. Seems to be our fault that a bunch of heartless dictators are in charge over there, doesn’t it, Car in?

  351. The dirty little secret is that the far left views homosexual relationships between adults and children to be a good thing. Remember that up through the 60s-70s there were plenty of leftists who were willing to argue for the sexualization of children.

  352. Someone once made the comment that colonialism was the worst thing that happened to Africa. The second worst? Decolonialism. Of course, the truth is that the world is full of savage people, tribalism, and corruption. The West only escaped it through a combination of hard work, Christianity, and time.

  353. Heh, Rush was just talking about the sexualization of our culture yesterday. Made some pretty good points.

  354. Yes, that pretty much sums it up, Alex. I think the problem is that since merely conquering them is a bad idea (as we did with the American Indians for the most part), trying to “help” them has been even worse. I think the corruption is the most harmful.

  355. Colonization would be a blessing, but that’s so out of fashion anymore.

  356. Heh, Rush was just talking about the sexualization of our culture yesterday. Made some pretty good points.

    I blame the neutering and government-sanctioned exclusion of fathers from the lives of little girls. If you’re a dad and your little girl left the house with “juicy” on her tuckus, you’re part of the problem.

  357. Good morning cool kids

  358. My MIL lies to get you to do what she wants, she makes up supporting information. She also lies to spare your feelings or make herself look better than what she is which is a lying liar.

    We’ve learned to deal with it, but it was harder for the Pupster Boyz when they were younger, we stopped covering for her when they got to be teenagers.

    Your Cow orker seems to have taken it to a whole new level.

  359. The problem is that we try to “help” them without actually changing anything. We can’t hurt feelings by telling them that they shouldn’t act a certain way.

    Case in point: Afghanistan. I think we would have done far better ten years ago to tell the Afghan government, “We’ll take all those war orphans off your hands, if you just give us a couple of valleys to run without interference.” Set up schools, teach them Western values along with how to fight, and ten years later you’d have an army.

  360. Colonization would be a blessing, but that’s so out of fashion anymore.

    Assimilation would be a blessing. Take a few good things from their culture, and just trash the rest.

    But that’s out of fashion as well.

  361. Obama brought 900 people with him to Belgium.

    900.

  362. How many more went to China with Michelle?

  363. Scott, Obama doesn’t believe in defense in a military sense, but he DOES believe in it on a personal level.

  364. One of my sisters created an alternate reality too. It was the ‘EVERYTHING’S PERFECT’ kind.

    Three kids, two German cars, big house in the suburbs. Horseback riding, lavish vacations….

    It all falls apart eventually.

  365. Michelle took 70, I think.

  366. God, you assholes are lazy. I’ll put up a new post but you know what that means…

  367. Laura – wow, what a deal; sounds like she’s been off her meds for a long while. 😦

  368. Cyn, you would like her if you met her. Nice lady. It is so hard to believe this has been going on. I never felt for a second that she was trying to aggrandize herself or manipulate me. She was just describing situations or people that she knew. Who, in the strictest interpretation of “objective” “reality,” do not “exist.” If you want to get all persnickety about it.

  369. These may be actual people she’s talking about. They’re just not who she says they are.

  370. New, less manly post available for your gardening pleasure.


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