What better way to honor wymyn of all types by objectifying them? I guess they could all get off their lazy asses and make me a sammich, but just posing for the camera is enough for today. Thanks bishes. *slap on the ass.
*
But before we get to the wymyns, let’s take a moment to sing an ode of pure romance, aimed squarely at the pulsing, throbbing, emotional side of these lovely lasses that possess massive chesticles. OR DOES IT?
*
*
Yes please!
Testes time. Now I know what you’re thinking…how can we possibly squeeze anymore cream out of this cannoli??? I assure you that it can and will be done if you just put your tits around mind to it. Or you can just skip the testes and look at the amazing assortment of humpty dumplings I’ve put together for you.
*
630 – Emperor Heraclius returns the True Cross, one of the holiest Christian relics, to Jerusalem.
717 – Battle of Vincy between Charles Martel and Ragenfrid.
1188 – Emperor Antoku accedes to the throne of Japan.
1857 – An earthquake in Tokyo, Japan kills over 100,000.
1871 – Otto von Bismarck is appointed Chancellor of the German Empire.
1925 – The Butler Act prohibits the teaching of human evolution in Tennessee.
1945 – World War II: British troops liberate Mandalay, Burma.
1968 – Battle of Karameh in Jordan between Israeli Defense Forces and Fatah.
1970 – The first Earth Day proclamation is issued by Mayor of San Francisco Joseph Alioto.
1989 – Sports Illustrated reports allegations tying baseball player Pete Rose to baseball gambling.
1990 – Namibia becomes independent after 75 years of South African rule.
School Time! Now you will blow me.
*
Safety First!
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Awwwrrrrr.
*
You can thank Cyn for the video. If you can make it to the middle there is a guy footing (is that even a thing? Please tell me it’s not a thing) some other dude. And there’s a baby face covering his gentleman’s sausage. What the actual fucking fuck is going in here? Please submit your answers to Cyn’s email addy.
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336 Comments
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Git up, fuchers.
Good morning.
Stupendous cans.
Linkies later, out the door for the OR
Heh. I’ve been to the train station already. Gonna be a long day.
http://fitfemme.tumblr.com/
I’d seen it, but it’s too porny, and thus contains triggers.
The real kind, that make your brain want to engage in a behavior based on neural connections that wire the behavior to a pleasurable activity — like seeing a bottle of booze as an alcoholic. Not the fake kind, where you hear or see something you disagree with and decide to perform criminal acts.
I’ve got my new chicks chirping happily next to me right now.
wakey wakey
Got 5 Golden laced wyandotts, ONE silver laced (last one he had), 5 black sex link, 5 light brahmas (love these), 3 silkies (OMGGGGGGGG) and 3 runner ducks.
I. am. So. Excited.
I want some more silver laced wyandotts, so i may call him to tell me when he’s got more.
He had SO many cool chickens. I went into his back coop. OMG. *chicken lust*
All sorts of Marens and specialty birds.
peep peep peep
I asked him what unit. He says 422, but he’s been at college for 4 months so he doesn’t really know what’s going on. I tell him to look down at the big yellow 420 where his car is parked. He tells me he’s been at college for four months and that he thinks he should call his mom to figure this out. Mom confirmed that 420 and 422 are indeed different numbers.
We are fucking doomed.
Unless the kid was a math major, I don’t see what’s so bad.
Pat?
http://is.gd/uL6BIw
Our BSLs have been pretty good birds. I decided against the liver yesterday, so they got a treat.
on March 21, 2014 8:16 am
Pat?
http://is.gd/uL6BIw
Ha.
Cheep cheep cheep SPLASH (duck jumps into water dish)
MJ’s parking spot is 420? HAHAHAHAHAH I know why that kid parked there. Hah!
I got some last year too. This year is basically the same ones I got last year, except for the wyandotts (being golden v silver laced) plus the silkies and the ducks.
Morning, children.
The whole presidential library thing rattles the “common folk” in me.
Aren’t monuments (which is basically what these things become) supposed to have some sort of historical perceptive? I find the whole thing ridiculous and unseemly.
Obama has been the worst president in my lifetime, and yet they – already – accepting bids for his library.
I know, I know, they all do it. I just find it …idiotic. And the hubris of a living man picking and helping to design the monument to HIM. ga. I bet Obama’s is going to have those tacky columns.
HAHAHAHA that Stella Ralfini vid is really hilariously effed up. Old white women in Indian clothing who push taking a load on the chin are weird.
I bet Obama’s is going to have those tacky columns.
And an historical Presidential choom display, complete with Ozium and a lava lamp.
I bet Obama’s is going to have those tacky columns.
An American flag to stand on.
Constitution toilet paper in the bathrooms.
Free entrance for blacks, $50 for whites, unless they are Dem donors.
Constant drone surveillance.
And you are raaaaaacist if you don’t visit.
I know noting Stella is white and that Indians have specific cultural attire is rayciss, but I’m comfortable with my raycissism. I won’t change for you.
He’s going to get his own holiday.
If he doesn’t we are racist.
And you are raaaaaacist if you don’t visit.
Color me absent.
Chicago is going to put the full-press on Obama to have it there, but he’s going to wan to 1) live in Hawaii and 2) be close to the library so he can bask in the glory.
But – next to ZERO will visit it in Hawaii. You want to go to the beach (or even Pearl Harbor) or do you want to go to Obama’s library?
ba hhaa haaaaa …
This should be interesting
I hope Obama Day is in the summer.
I’m so excited, I’m doing developmenty things today. Right now I’m installing CentOS on a virtual machine so I can finally make things.
*cries quietly in corner*
He’s going to get his own holiday.
If he doesn’t we are racist.
that’s the part that kills me. It’d be like Warren G Harding Day or Woodrow Wilson Day. I don’t care if he’s 1/2 black – he’s a shitty president. Giving him a holiday because he’s replete with melanin is like giving a holiday for big feet. Fuck’m.
I’m so excited, I’m doing developmenty things today.
So, what you’re saying is, up until today, you’ve been developmentally disabled?
So, what you’re saying is, up until today, you’ve been developmentally disabled?
Yes. I got the hardware I needed to actually do any development on my contract yesterday. I was developmentally disabled for over a month.
If I find there’s a good market for pickled ghost peppers, though, I’m changing jobs.
It’ll have a minaret broadcasting the call to prayer.
Eeeeeeeee beeeeeee teeeeeeeeeeeee
Kunt & The Gang is disgusting and and terrible and hilarious. I dunno who posted the link last night, but, thanks. i haven’t stopped laughing – every single song is offensive as hell.
I’m bitter because I filed my taxes last night. I figure I paid for that surfer dude to get a lobster dinner, Beasn’s former customers to get a couple of birthday cakes, and a few hours of Mooch’s flight to China. And it still wasn’t enough, I owe another $1,150. Yay.
Off to work.
It’ll have a minaret broadcasting the call to prayer.
Eeeeeeeee beeeeeee teeeeeeeeeeeee
Heh.
Off to work.
Work is a scam.
Morning all…
Cyn, you are an evil, evil woman. But I am ok with that
Comment by Car in on March 21, 2014 8:41 am
The whole presidential library thing rattles the “common folk” in me.
==========
How many common folk are in you? Round to the nearest 10.
Right now, NASA isn’t much different than the surfer dude.
Juneteenth could be Obamaday.
What does NASA do?
NASA produces CGI images that they claim are from other planets. It’s a scam.
Putin is probably going to take ownership of the ISS.
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/compassion-matters/201212/is-cynicism-ruining-your-life
It does have ethnic Russians in need of protection.
Also he’s the only one who can get there.
Richard Branson can probably get there.
Possibly Elon Musk. I’m curious what would happen if he decided to go there and take possession in an Ayn Rand-ish plot-twist.
60% of the cigarettes smoked in NYC have been smuggled in from somewhere cheaper.
New York piles on the taxes and VA and NC reap the rewards.
I’m using a miter saw and EVERYTHING building a new brooder box.
I need a tool belt.
I saw Miter Saw open for Brooder Box at Lapeerapalooza in 2014.
I don’t objectify women. They are not even objects. Women are a scam.
Green Shirt is green hubba hubba wow.
I’m going to try the coconut-flour bread again tonight with some slight modifications. I will be sure to let y’all know how it comes out.
Hahahahahaha
I’ve been dealing with a bunch of fraternity cunts these past few years. They are a total pain in the ass. The rules are “stupid”, and therefore can be totally ignored.
The mothers will call up and say, “It’s uncomfortable in my son’s room. Can you send someone over to fix it?”
Or, “There are only curtains on the shower stalls. Why can’t there be lockable doors? My son is used to having his own bathroom.”
Or, “What do you mean, my son is being charged for the broken bed in his room? He says he didn’t do it.”
Feck, it’s a riot.
Don’t forget Elon Musk is just a slightly more productive Orren Boyle. Tesla and Spacex would not exist without fat gubmint contracts and loan guarantees.
A few forbidden links, MJ, but all in all, green shirt chick made up for it. Not a bad BBF today. http://is.gd/i3u5BJ
And that video is a fucking LOLZOMFG bit of twisted hilarity.
Tesla and Spacex would not exist without fat gubmint contracts and loan guarantees.
Oh, I know. It’s the fun parts of NASA outsourced and relieved of most of the personnel bullshit.
SwankyCyn hahahaha
I am left to wonder if green shirt chick’s are real. They seem stupendous for someone with her wasp waist.
You should research that.
Nah, they are too big for my tastes anyhow.
California Democratic Sen. Dianne Feinstein is circulating a letter on Capitol Hill calling once again for a ban on semi-automatic rifles and asking for President Barack Obama to keep his State of the Union promise to make 2014 a “year of action.”
…
Although Feinstein recognizes that the firearms are designed for civilian use and never manufactured or used by any standing army, she maintained that “many semiautomatic firearms on the market today do not have a military origin but are modeled closely after military firearms.”
Says the wizened cunt with a CC permit and a billionaire husband who won a bid to cash in on taxpayers money by building a useless “high-speed rail” line from Fresno to North Buttfuck, California.
Eat a sack of ground glass, sweetie.
Besides, I’m busy reading this while I wait for a download.
Woohoo! Bright green feral parrots two doors down are on the wing.
Besides, I’m busy reading this while I wait for a download.
Spoiler alert: it was Colonel Mustard with the candlestick in the server closet.
I need a tool belt.
Euphamism?
GO, the concentrated stupidity in that quote is painful.
I think “tool belt” is Licorice Dick’s euphemism for his Cabinet.
No, it’s what Michelle makes him go get whenever he pisses her off.
Which power tool maker uses large, bright purple bodies? Battery operated of course.
My day is made.
Just came back from dropping off HotBride.
So, a guy jaywalks diagonally across a busy intersection, and stops in front of an oncoming car forcing him to stop – typical belligerent young tough with a chip on his shoulder.
I’m sitting there waiting for traffic to clear so I can make my left turn, so this all happens right in front of me.
Nice looking black guy rolls down window, and tells the guy he’ll get killed that way. Young guys tells him to get fucked and why don’t you step out of the car.
Black guy gets out of the car and the young guy gets in his face. I notice the back guy has an ID tag on. The young guy gets right up in the black guy’s face and chest bumps him. Meanwhile a white chick in a London Fog gets out of the passenger side and comes around.
In a flash the black guy spins the young tough around, spread-eagles him against the car, and the white chick starts frisking him. In another flash, the black guy zip ties the guy’s wrists, spins him around and tells him he’s under arrest. I can’t go anywhere because the intersection is blocked.
Pretty soon the young guy is put in the back seat of the car. As the black guy is getting back in his seat, he looks over at me. I give him a thumbs up, and toss him $20.
And the sun is shining without a cloud in the sky.
Which power tool maker uses large, bright purple bodies? Battery operated of course.
She’s been ordering from Black and Decker’s “special” catalog.
Hotspur that story is awesome.
I don’t know where Cyn found that video but the special effects are amazing. Is this something from George Lucas’s company? Or perhaps Pixar?
Half-Black and Decker.
Or, Black and Dickher.
Just discovered that my AT&T U-Verse service for wireless (not TV) entitles me to watch the NCAA Tournament games live on my iPad.
It.Is.An.Otstanding.Fucking.Day.
Black & Pecker.
Your mom emailed it to me.
President Vladimir Putin completed the annexation of Crimea on Friday, signing the peninsula into Russia at nearly the same time his Ukrainian counterpart sealed a deal pulling his country closer into Europe’s orbit.
I’d say the reset button has been reset.
That story was awesome, ‘Spurt! A good day infuckingdeed.
Your mom emailed it to me.
It was her student film.
I don’t have filthy AT&T, and I can watch them too.
Hotspur, you run a frat house?
Is that where MJ got that video?
Several years ago some punks did that to me. I was doing about 45 MPH and didn’t slow down or swerve.
They dove out of the way at the last possible second.
Laura was not happy with me.
Alternate names for Hillary! On the campaign trail
Bill’s Beard
Smartest Woman In The World Of Warcraft
Mama Russia’s Little Helper
Miss Benghazi
The Pantsuit of Destiny
That
Huma Abedin’s Better Half
Hotspurt lives in a frat house. Rosetta wouldn’t let him into his sorority.
We’ve been doing a historic restoration and addition, but we can only work on it in the summer. The rest of the year we do repairs and maintenance.
A management company actually does the day to day fucking around with the dickheads.
They dove out of the way at the last possible second.
Your aim is getting poor.
Hotspur, can you replace a barge board without fucking up the overlying roof?
We call them facias, and yes you can. You will probably have to replace the drip edge – no big deal.
Is the drip edge the flashing?
I see. There is no drip edge lumber on our house. None of our design have them. The flashing rests on top of our fascia and folds over onto the roof.
Hahahahaha
I ❤ Ann Arbor.
http://www.mlive.com/business/ann-arbor/index.ssf/2014/03/new_alcohol_delivery_service_d.html
GO, it’s the light colored metal edge in the photo. It keeps water from running back under the shingles, and getting behind the facia (barge board) due to capillary action.
“Okay, then what we have that would corresponded to a true bitch is simply the metal flashing that fits on top of the fascia.”
I love AutoCorrect. What I dictated was actually “what we have that would correspond to a drip edge”
The end of one fascia had been repaired with Bondo or putty in the past, and now it ought to be replaced. There is a section about 8 inches long that is spongy. It is the old repair.
Nearly half of callers to California’s health insurance exchange in February and March couldn’t get through and abandoned their call, state figures show. […]
…
Still, less than 5% of calls are answered within 30 seconds and about a third of callers get a busy signal, state data show. Overall, 40% of exchange customers surveyed said they found the enrollment process difficult.
Covered California has also been criticized by its certified enrollment counselors for payment delays. The exchange pays $58 for every successful enrollment by a counselor.
Clownifornia: measuring our success one failure at a time.
…And in today’s edition of This Old House™…
I need to replace all of ours.
It’s a project that I have been putting off for about 15 years.
I hate working on ladders. Hate.
Plus, when I remove that rotten wood it will expose all kinds of mortar that will have to be repaired.
It’s the topless edition.
Old houses suck. When a house turns 50 it should be burned to the ground.
When a house turns 50 it should be burned to the ground.
Start with the White House.
Hi, NSA!
I just dropped my Hot Pocket on the floor. “three second rule”
“Old houses have character.”
Character is french for pain-in-the-ass.
When I found out Rosetta bought an old farm house I laughed and laughed and laughed.
This happened in South Africa, they are a little more stringent about jaywalking.
*Warning – Extreme Violence*
Huh. Michelle went to china to meet with rich kids from the US.
Some of the American students studying at Beijing Normal School come from the U.S.’ toniest private schools, like Phillips Academy Andover in Mass. and Sidwell Friends in Washington, which Obama’s daughters attend. The Beijing Normal School program for some foreign students, according to two American teenagers, costs $50,000 a year.
It’s good that she’s going there to tell them how important education is.
I just dropped my Hot Pocket on the floor. “three second rule”
Surprisingly, the “five-second rule” is not a scam. There was some study done recently that showed minimal transfer of germs to food if it was picked up off the floor quickly.
Michelle Obama and Evita Peron: is there a difference?
GO, that’s not going to be quite so easy. However, there are products on the market that you can inject into rotted wood that structurally solidify the board, then you can sand it and paint it.
If that whole area is Bondo, you should cut it out and see what’s left of the original board.
The drip edge looks custom bent, so you’ll need someone with a sheet metal brake to make the replacement – still not a big deal.
You can tell it’s not Scott because the van has windows.
Michelle Obama and Evita Peron: is there a difference?
No. Michelle can do whatever she wants with impunity. It’s disgusting.
The section of board will have to be replaced, not repaired. I can see there is a section about 8 feet long that was already replaced some point in the past. Looks like we can remove that whole piece and put in a new one. The guy who helped us do all of the major Hardscaping is a builder as well, and he has lots of contacts if his people cannot do it on their own. Fortunately this is the only spot where the fascia looks deteriorated.
That looks like a pretty important piece. Around here that rotten piece of wood would be responsible for holding up a thousand pounds of snow. I thought facia was decorative, that looks more structural to me.
Obamajob from 2:00 – 10:00 today, that’s almost a double.
Michelle Obama and Evita Peron: is there a difference?
Evita at least came from a poor background and arguably did some good through her charity for the poor.
Obamajob from 4 until ?
Not a double.
Double tomorrow. 11:30 – ? Could be 9 but most likely it will be 10:30.
I don’t think it’s structural. It does not support anything, not even a gutter. It merely faces the horizontal beams that support the roof. However, it will tend to get wet during the rains, so I ought to fix it. At least where I live snow on the roof is not a concern.
You can tell it’s not Scott because the van has windows.
Banglar Party Van!!11!
http://www.mlive.com/business/ann-arbor/index.ssf/2014/03/new_alcohol_delivery_service_d.html
Yeah, that needed a mobile app. Pfffft.
*calls Zino’s Pizza and Liquor for a stuffed Chicago and a bottle of Jack Daniel’s
A stuffed Chicago what??
Um, on second thought, maybe I don’t wanna know.
Lordy Reekus.
http://detroit.cbslocal.com/2014/03/21/dozens-of-dead-dogs-uncovered-by-melting-snow-at-sprawling-detroit-park/
This photo was taken in Burns Park in Ann Arbor. The building in the background is where my daughters went to grade school.
http://life.time.com/culture/is-this-the-happiest-photo-ever-made/?iid=lf%7Crelated#1
A stuffed Chicago what??
Oh, you poor, poor girl. Here.
My bracket is toast.
Duke is about to get beaten by Mercer.
It’s probably best that knowledge gets stored away and authorities continue with the normal routine rather than actually do anything about it. Knowing where the criminals actually are and staking out their haunts interferes with important stuff like coffee runs and mackin’ on coworkers.
Duke is about to get beaten by Mercer.
hahahahahah Anytime Coach K takes it in the teeth is a good day. Sorry, Hotspur
Oh, you poor, poor girl. Here.
I… I remember those, from long ago; it used to be the only kind of pizza I ate before I got married.
*single tear rolls down cheek*
It’s beautiful.
I’m prolly in the minority here, but I detest the stuffed Chicago. I’ve eaten a ton of those damn things. I prefer regular old flat pizza, or a nice, reasonable deep dish crust. Stuffed is overkill and too much damned work, IMO.
I know – I’m a killjoy. I still like babies and puppies, though.
If I’m going to do the grave damage to myself of eating pizza, you can be goodly-darned sure I’m getting a big ol’ stuffed pie.
I’ve got a wooden rail porch thingy that’s all beat to hell and needs to be torn out and replaced. They look like this (when they’re not beat to hell like mine):
I’m thinking of replacing it with something like this:
http://www.homedepot.com/p/EZ-Handrail-8-ft-x-36-in-White-Aluminum-1-in-Square-Baluster-Railing-Kit-EZ8RW/100669121?MERCH=REC-_-SearchPLPHorizontal1-2-_-NA-_-100669121-_-N
Re-doing my VM because I made it too small the first time. I’m sure this won’t make my hard drive cry.
Aluminum?
Seems lazy.
I like it, Dave. I want those on my house. I would have had them but the husband vetoed it when we had this place built.
It’s 13 years later. I’m going to get them.
Apropos of nothing, from one of my industry newsletters:
A few of WD-40’s uses:
• Remove stickers from credit cards
• Keep paint from sticking to paint brushes
• Clean newspaper ink from tables
• Remove cement from metal
• Soften stiff leather sandals
• Spray on bathroom mirror to keep from fogging
• Keep garbage disposal from seizing after periods of idleness
• Spray on watch band to keep it from pulling out your arm hair
• Spray on golf tees to penetrate hard ground areas
• Clean old coins
• Drive out moisture from fl ashlights
• Remove crayon from carpet
• Remove adhesive price tags from shoe bottoms
• Remove permanent ink from most items
• Prevent rust on patio furniture screws
• Prevent medicine cabinets closures from sticking
• Lubricate luggage zippers
• Free stuck LEGO blocks
• Remove stubborn temporary tattoos
• Keep clay from sticking to shovels
Apropos of nothing, from one of my industry newsletters:
A few of WD-40’s uses:
Sean’s Penis can do all that and more.
Heh… love that bit.
Can it get labels off of salsa jars?
>> I like it, Dave. I want those on my house. I would have had them but the husband vetoed it when we had this place built.
It’s 13 years later. I’m going to get them.
The old stuff is 16 years old. I’d like not to have to replace it again. Thinking about metal columns too.
QUESTION: WHERE DID THEY GET THE NAME “WD-40”?
http://wd40.com/about-us/history/
So, do I go pick up deep fried walleye and fries at the fish fry, or do I prepare healthy salmon, vegetables, and potatoes at home?
I’m prolly opting for the salmon, but I prefer walleye and fries.
So I take it you guys liked the video?
I think I like this woman:
http://washingtonexaminer.com/australian-anchorwoman-stop-blaming-men-for-your-problems/article/2546014
So I take it you guys liked the video?
Well, the soundtrack was better than most of the musical selections you poat, but no…I did not like the video.
You can admit it. There’s no one else here.
I won’t tell.
My name is not on this POS Poat.
Cyn sent it to me. It’s her fault.
It’s her fault.
http://i.imgur.com/2TcbtmK.jpg?1
*talk to it*
‘Sup boobs?
‘Sup, Andy? I was in Conyers today.
Ahh, Conyers. Used to date a girl from there.
Monica Conyers? Ewwwww…….
Cyn sent it to me. It’s her fault.
Tattletale.
*unleashes tigers into MJ’s shower for him to find in the morning*
Good BBQ in Conyers. Not sure about girlfriends.
So I take it you guys liked the video?
Not so much. Videos like that are for Lance Bass and Wednesdays.
MJ, gay marriage is now unconstitutional in Michigan.
How can that be possible? I’ve been working basically 12 hours a day with real life people so I have no idea what’s going on with anything except Herve Villachaize isn’t exactly bragging about da plane.
How did that happen? Totally unrelated, but did you finally come out of the closet and you’re disappointed?
Oops, I fucked that up. The gay marriage ban is unconstitutional. Didn’t mean to scare you.
>> MJ, gay marriage is now unconstitutional in Michigan.
Think you left out a few words there
http://abcnews.go.com/US/wireStory/judge-strikes-michigans-ban-gay-marriage-23012280
Good day, wads of gay.
Now that’s a pair of tits:
I hope Muppet Marriage is still safe.
For MJ’s sake, that is.
So you’re gay and dyslexic? That’s gotta suck.
HS: Where is the Hole Glory????
Random gay dudes assembled near glory hole: What???
Okay, I need to take a break from the intertubes. I come here to look for funneh, and I get slapped across the face as being equal to the surfer dude. Thanks a whole helluva lot, Goddard, for making what used to be the best place to work a fucking laughingstock. I know (I hope) that Scott didn’t mean it personally, but I AM taking it personally. I’m tired of being one of the few at work that’s pulling the wagon while more pile on for the ride and the smarter ones leave. I’m stupid for staying, but I still have experiments left to fly and good work in the lab left to do. I’m not a fucking leech.
I’m going to visit my dad for a while, and this time I won’t bitch about his slow internet connection. Someone else can do HHD for a while, I’m done with this for now. And I found $20, but it was Mini-me’s, so I had to give it back.
There’s a faint growling noise coming from the bathroom.
Probably just the pipes settling.
Now that’s a pair of tits:
http://i.imgur.com/FHha8.gif
You are sooo banned.
The only thing better than a pair of tits is…two pairs of tits:
http://tinyurl.com/k8sjxys
Good BBQ in Conyers. Not sure about girlfriends.
Both are a lot easier to eat if you slather on some tangy sauce first.
Hole Glory?
Is that the name of a band?
Roamy, thank God that there are still people like you left at NASA. You and those like you are what keeps me hanging on to what little pride I have left in this country.
Probably just the pipes settling.
Yes.
If you need a break, that’s cool, roamy. We’ll be here when you get back. And not like it means much, but I’m still proud to know somebody who works for NASA.
For MJ ONLY, no one else click, you have been wARnED oR eLSe!
Crap. That’s not how I meant it.
Sorry if you took it personally Roamy.
Poo. I have to go back to work now.
Michelle needs lobster.
I clicked. Because why should MJ have all the fun? And the sequel is good, too.
Afternoon.
Yesterday I built five (5) of these:
http://tinyurl.com/bm49fw2
and today I built one (1) of these:
http://tinyurl.com/mbq62sp
And the sequel is good, too.
HAHAHA The escalated weirdness did not disappoint.
*gives Jewstin a swirled steel wool Indian burn*
Cyn is into parts of the internet usually reserved for Japanese Gay Lighsaber Pron addicts.
O_O
OMG.
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
“Masterclass: How to Fuck With A Union”
I don’t understand how somedays you make 9 of these:
http://is.gd/wYivjy
Then the next day make one of these:
http://is.gd/0Qfdie
I’m reasonably certain they’re trying to kill me to avoid paying any severance. I’m on crazy over-time, I’m the only builder in my area, and everybody with a thing brings it to me because Manticore.
“Masterclass: How to Fuck With A Union, Part Dieux”
Cyn is into parts of the internet usually reserved for Japanese Gay Lighsaber Pron addicts.
I feel like I have found the undernets. Or Rosetta’s private links.
Help. Meeeeeeeeeeee….
You should turn a giant angry beaver loose on Manticore.
You may have qualified for membership as an Elder of the Internet.
MJ, it depends on the schedule. A lot of the ones and twos I build are usually me working by myself on a customer order that got crammed into the schedule. The five piece and bigger builds are usually team builds.
The five Taco Bells I built yesterday was fucking outstanding. We normally build them in lots of five and they’re scheduled at 44 hours per build.
You may have qualified for membership as an Elder of the Internet.
Hooray!!!
Wait…. awww shit!
MJ, it depends on the schedule. A lot of the ones and twos I build are usually me working by myself on a customer order that got crammed into the schedule. The five piece and bigger builds are usually team builds.
—————————
Oh, now I get it. Thanks, Jew.
Bread came out better today, but it still wants very badly to stick to the loaf pan. I think I need to make it as drop biscuits or just tinker until it’s adequate as pizza dough.
If you were to name a drink after Dave, what would it be?
http://www.recipenutrition.com/MRBshowRecipe.aspx?recno=68658&bck=2&recname=Coconut%20Flour%20Bread
If anyone cares.
If you were to name a drink after Dave, what would it be?
The Bionic Knee.
It’s blue, if that helps.
Whisky and Water.
Blue Bayou.
If you were to name a drink after Dave, what would it be?
Dave Jr.
Blue Sploosh.
Whoopsy Splashy.
Dave Jr.
—————–
Hahahahahaha. Smart ass.
Davey Wavey
Davey is good.
Shit, I meant Davey Wavey.
Wavey Davey
A Wet Dave
Davey Gravey
Davey’s Jones.
Dave’s Penis.
Because it’s a weak single shot most aimed at fat girls and middle-aged divorcees.
Dave on the Rocks
Slippery Dave
I am sad about Roamy. I hope she comes back.
I also miss Mare, but I’m guessing she just forgot about us.
Evening Hostages.
Cyn! Email!
Roamy will be back or I’ll kick her ass what good for!
I checked on Mare: she’s taking a breather but when I read the first letter of each of the lines of her email is spelled out “COCK”, so I think that’s a good sign she’ll be back soon.
Brent! You can’t make me!!!
Okay. BRB.
Okay, so in closing, it is not necessary to disclose how many potatoes you’ve wedged up your ass.
Oops that should have gone in the email and not here. Sorry Brent!!
Worst. BBF. Poat. Ever.
(Except for green-shirt lass. She’s painfully cute.)
…and now, I’ll read the comments and hope like hell there’s no drama….
*foots self
It’s a thing.
Aaaaaah fuck.
She’s painfully cute.
Prostate cancer.
Ummmmm
Can I ban MJ more than once?
As an Elder of the Internet, yes.
>> Aaaaaah fuck.
wait, what?
Was there drama again?
I have been missing so much lately
As an Elder of the Internet, yes.
———————–
Hahahahahaha
Can I ban MJ more than once?
I’m sorry, but a Federal judge has ruled that the ban on MJ — though passed with 59% majority vote — is unconstitutional.
Aaaaaah fuck.
It’s not personal Roamy, it’s politics. So it’s local really cause somebody said all politics is local.
*obfuscation is my fall back position in these situations*
Ha ha I may still have a crush on Rick Astley.
I’m sorry, but a Federal judge has ruled that the ban on MJ — though passed with 59% majority vote — is unconstitutional.
Well craparooni.
I’m sorry, but a Federal judge has ruled that the ban on MJ — though passed with 59% majority vote — is unconstitutional.
—————————
Meh. That was month’s ago. If you took a vote to on banning today, only 58.89% would vote to ban me.
I have HUGE support in the Muppet community.
Polling said the gays would win the ballot issue a the time.
Polling isn’t voting.
>>>I have HUGE support in the Muppet community
ONE vote for MJ.
TWO votes for MJ!
THREE votes for MJ!!!
THREE! THREE VOTES FOR MJ!!!!
BWAAAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA
/Count Count
>> a the time
And y’all say *I* talk funny
Can we vote to pole?
Okay, Roamie is allowed to take a break, but if she doesn’t return, I’m gonna start kicking some ass around here…..
Either that or I’m gonna help her write her “Goodbye, fuckers!” poat.
‘Cause if you’re gonna leave, you gotta totally go out with style.
Can we vote to pole?
Pretty sure the judge in this case made voting for poling unnecessary. Poling is now going to be forced on everyone.
THREE! THREE VOTES FOR MJ!!!!
BWAAAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA
Folly Style?
ONE vote for MJ.
TWO votes for MJ!
THREE votes for MJ!!!
THREE! THREE VOTES FOR MJ!!!!
BWAAAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA
/Count Count
———————–
Very good. Que Bueno (for when Oso shows up)
QB (for when Oso shows up)
FTFY
So, Sprout, what’s the drink tomorrow?
I just saw the drink names.
Y’all are funny. You suck but you are funny.
QB, MJ.
Did anybody have to listen to anybody else bitch about their coworkers throughout the course of an entire meal today?
HA HA That made me belly laugh, Oso 😀
I’m going to make an old favorite, but make up a story with Dave and HS, but only you and the blog will know. Totally fictitious, but realistic enough because I actually worked in a bar near the base and knew a bunch of sailors that were always up to no good…
I used to bartend near Great Lakes Naval Base, and had four regulars that were attending technical school. They didn’t drink much, which struck me as odd, but I really liked them non the less.
One night they come in, and it’s clear they’re out to have a good time. The youngest of the four is celebrating his 25th birthday. Generally, they would occupy the best part of the bar, and entertain the girls. Two of them, including the birthday boy, were from Texas and had a bit of charm that the local girls from Illinois had never been subjected to. As the night wears on, the older of the two Texans asks me to make his young friend a drink for his birthday. Not a shot. A drink.
Now this older Texan had a habit of making sure that when he went out with the younger guys, one of them would end up wet. It could be a bucket of water, a squirt gun, or Long Island Sound. He was going to get you wet.
So I make this drink, and it’s bright blue, because I think, ‘Navy, water, blue.’ Look I’m not that smart. I just make the drinks.
As I put this drink in front of the younger Texan, the older one looks down the bar at him and says in his thick Texas drawl, ‘That looks pretty wavy, davey.’ And the name stuck.
They’d come in every one in a while and order a Wavy Davey, and then everyone knew it was going to be a fun night.
1.5 oz lemon vodka
.5 oz blue curaçao
.5 oz limoncello
splash sour
1 oz lime juice
>> but make up a story with Dave and HS, but only you and the blog will know
You just scared the ever lovin fuck outta me
Wavy Davey looks yummy. ~waves at Cyn~
>>>‘Cause if you’re gonna leave, you gotta totally go out with style.
You mean bitching, whining and being totally passive aggressive?
That sounds delicious.
You just scared the ever lovin fuck outta me
———————-
Don’t worry Dave, I’ll keep in light and funny and no one will ever know what the hell I’m talking about.
You mean bitching, whining and being totally passive aggressive?
————————-
Mom?
I’m going to make an old favorite, but make up a story with Dave and HS, but only you and the blog will know. Totally fictitious, but realistic enough because I actually worked in a bar near the base and knew a bunch of sailors that were always up to no good…
I used to bartend near Great Lakes Naval Base, and had four regulars that were attending technical school. They didn’t drink much, which struck me as odd, but I really liked them non the less.
One night they come in, and it’s clear they’re out to have a good time. The youngest of the four is celebrating his 25th birthday. Generally, they would occupy the best part of the bar, and entertain the girls. Two of them, including the birthday boy, were from Texas and had a bit of charm that the local girls from Illinois had never been subjected to. As the night wears on, the older of the two Texans asks me to make his young friend a drink for his birthday. Not a shot. A drink.
Now this older Texan had a habit of making sure that when he went out with the younger guys, one of them would end up wet. It could be a bucket of water, a squirt gun, or Long Island Sound. He was going to get you wet.
So I make this drink, and it’s bright blue, because I think, ‘Navy, water, blue.’ Look I’m not that smart. I just make the drinks.
As I put this drink in front of the younger Texan, the older one looks down the bar at him and says in his thick Texas drawl, ‘That looks pretty wavy, davey.’ And the name stuck.
They’d come in every one in a while and order a Wavy Davey, and then everyone knew it was going to be a fun night.
1.5 oz lemon vodka
.5 oz blue curaçao
.5 oz limoncello
splash sour
1 oz lime juice
——————–
Rape Culture
I didn’t read all that, but there’s nowhere near enough alcohol in it.
You mean bitching, whining and being totally passive aggressive?
That was me 15 years ago. I got better. Dropped the passive and the whining.
So Dave, you gonna be watching the Michigan/Texas game tomorrow afternoon?
I’m going to make an old favorite, but make up a story with Dave and HS, but only you and the blog will know. Totally fictitious, but realistic enough because I actually worked in a bar near the base and knew a bunch of sailors that were always up to no good…
I used to bartend near Great Lakes Naval Base, and had four regulars that were attending technical school. They didn’t drink much, which struck me as odd, but I really liked them non the less.
One night they come in, and it’s clear they’re out to have a good time. The youngest of the four is celebrating his 25th birthday. Generally, they would occupy the best part of the bar, and entertain the girls. Two of them, including the birthday boy, were from Texas and had a bit of charm that the local girls from Illinois had never been subjected to. As the night wears on, the older of the two Texans asks me to make his young friend a drink for his birthday. Not a shot. A drink.
Now this older Texan had a habit of making sure that when he went out with the younger guys, one of them would end up wet. It could be a bucket of water, a squirt gun, or Long Island Sound. He was going to get you wet.
So I make this drink, and it’s bright blue, because I think, ‘Navy, water, blue.’ Look I’m not that smart. I just make the drinks.
As I put this drink in front of the younger Texan, the older one looks down the bar at him and says in his thick Texas drawl, ‘That looks pretty wavy, davey.’ And the name stuck.
They’d come in every one in a while and order a Wavy Davey, and then everyone knew it was going to be a fun night.
1.5 oz lemon vodka
.5 oz blue curaçao
.5 oz limoncello
splash sour
1 oz lime juice
——————–
Sounds Bossy.
>>>I didn’t read all that, but there’s nowhere near enough alcohol in it.
One of my sponsors is a bank.
I’m stunned that they haven’t pulled their sponsorship yet
I’m going to make an old favorite, but make up a story with Dave and HS, but only you and the blog will know. Totally fictitious, but realistic enough because I actually worked in a bar near the base and knew a bunch of sailors that were always up to no good…
I used to bartend near Great Lakes Naval Base, and had four regulars that were attending technical school. They didn’t drink much, which struck me as odd, but I really liked them non the less.
One night they come in, and it’s clear they’re out to have a good time. The youngest of the four is celebrating his 25th birthday. Generally, they would occupy the best part of the bar, and entertain the girls. Two of them, including the birthday boy, were from Texas and had a bit of charm that the local girls from Illinois had never been subjected to. As the night wears on, the older of the two Texans asks me to make his young friend a drink for his birthday. Not a shot. A drink.
Now this older Texan had a habit of making sure that when he went out with the younger guys, one of them would end up wet. It could be a bucket of water, a squirt gun, or Long Island Sound. He was going to get you wet.
So I make this drink, and it’s bright blue, because I think, ‘Navy, water, blue.’ Look I’m not that smart. I just make the drinks.
As I put this drink in front of the younger Texan, the older one looks down the bar at him and says in his thick Texas drawl, ‘That looks pretty wavy, davey.’ And the name stuck.
They’d come in every one in a while and order a Wavy Davey, and then everyone knew it was going to be a fun night.
1.5 oz lemon vodka
.5 oz blue curaçao
.5 oz limoncello
splash sour
1 oz lime juice
————————–
Really?
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MICHAEL!!!!
(You stil owe me $15)
Why? Bankers drink cocktails.
>> So Dave, you gonna be watching the Michigan/Texas game tomorrow afternoon?
It’ll be on. I don’t hold out much hope for Texas. Or Baylor. Or me past 4pm. Late naps suck ass.
I’m going to make an old favorite, but make up a story with Dave and HS, but only you and the blog will know. Totally fictitious, but realistic enough because I actually worked in a bar near the base and knew a bunch of sailors that were always up to no good…
I used to bartend near Great Lakes Naval Base, and had four regulars that were attending technical school. They didn’t drink much, which struck me as odd, but I really liked them non the less.
One night they come in, and it’s clear they’re out to have a good time. The youngest of the four is celebrating his 25th birthday. Generally, they would occupy the best part of the bar, and entertain the girls. Two of them, including the birthday boy, were from Texas and had a bit of charm that the local girls from Illinois had never been subjected to. As the night wears on, the older of the two Texans asks me to make his young friend a drink for his birthday. Not a shot. A drink.
Now this older Texan had a habit of making sure that when he went out with the younger guys, one of them would end up wet. It could be a bucket of water, a squirt gun, or Long Island Sound. He was going to get you wet.
So I make this drink, and it’s bright blue, because I think, ‘Navy, water, blue.’ Look I’m not that smart. I just make the drinks.
As I put this drink in front of the younger Texan, the older one looks down the bar at him and says in his thick Texas drawl, ‘That looks pretty wavy, davey.’ And the name stuck.
They’d come in every one in a while and order a Wavy Davey, and then everyone knew it was going to be a fun night.
1.5 oz lemon vodka
.5 oz blue curaçao
.5 oz limoncello
splash sour
1 oz lime juice
————————–
Absolutely.
Station asked me to continue for another season.
This season ends April 12. I agreed, but said I would like a weekend off in between seasons.
“Who would you suggest filling in on the 19th?”
“Maybe Tom Hill would do the show?”
I could almost feel him pushing me aside to yell “I’LL DO IT!!!!”
He’s already cc’d me on 7 e-mails, where he’s invited people on “his” show.
Hilarious.
HAHAHAHAHA. ALSO congrats Wiser!
Who is Tom Hill?
My parents, sister, brother-in-law, and niece will be visiting on the 19th. Confirmation is on the 20th. I’m sort of shocked they all wanted to come.
>>>ALSO congrats Wiser!
Thanks, my friend.
I definitely need to find a reason to get you on as a guest.
>>>Who is Tom Hill?
That is the question I hope most people will be asking soon
>> Slippery Dave
Slippery Rock would work better.
Wiser has a radio show?
http://www.sru.edu
I’ve listened to it once or twice. It’s not awful.
Evening, holes a ass.
Uncle Art has been bouncing a baby on his knee most of the day.
http://tinyurl.com/p2dbqb4
Meet Fred.
>>>Wiser has a radio show?
It’s like a podcast, only with fewer listeners
Fred is the most realistic looking inflatable I’ve ever seen. Puts dolly to shame.
>>>It’s like a podcast, only with fewer listeners
Oh. So it’s like a radio version of MMM?
Hi, Fred. I’ll give you twenty bucks if you can pee in Uncle Art’s mouth during a diaper change. There’s fifty in it for you if you can get some poo in there.
Serial q wiser, Arbitron ratings are quarterly, surely you’ve seen em since you sold this idear. Are they decent? I mean for your station on weekends
Oh. So it’s like a radio version of MMM?
I’ll have you know I have lurkers. At least a few.
Pupster is impressed
http://imgur.com/gallery/4Qy4Rlw
Fred looks awesomely cuddly.
I’m apparently a far better baby whisperer than Auntie Viki. Every time *she* holds Fred, he cries loudly. Not so when I hold him.
//slips Fred a bit more bourbon
GIRL ON THE FLOOR
Lurkers aren’t real.
>>>GIRL ON THE FLOOR
*trips and falls on girl*
Oops.
Awww Fred it a cutie.
That new baby smell.
LET THE GIRL HIT THE FLOOR
LET THE GIRL HIT THE FLOOR
LET THE GIRL HIT THE FLOOR
OOOOOOOF That was my rib.
Smooth move, BC!
LET THE GIRL HIT THE FLOOR
LET THE GIRL HIT THE FLOOR
LET THE GIRL HIT THE FLOOR
I heard that song on the way to pick up the boys from school the other day and all that I could hear was that damn parrot in my head. Stupid internets!
Because I know you love me
Only 8 million hits?
2 million are mine.
Well, I used to Cyn.
Do you ever think that maybe the internet has ruined us? I can’t hear the regular version of this song without the following abomination getting back into my head:
That’s about how many times I have clicked that sucker too, Scott.
http://is.gd/FcK9ST
One of my better efforts. NSFW
http://thecaptives.wordpress.com/2014/03/21/friday-night-lights/
You can’t hide your lion eyes.
Sean: Every. single. day.
Nice work, Xbrad.
Now I want to go shopping.
Okay, peeps: Middle of the night insomnia bs is finally catching up with me. I think it’s subconscious mom stuff waking up to make sure that the Axeman’s pump is working, and it always is, but you know how that goes. Stoopid mom brains.
See you for Saturday Morning Cartoons and Radiobud time, and don’t hog all the Coco Puffs.
http://tinyurl.com/nzxxekh
http://tinyurl.com/lesf64c
This story is bugging me.
http://www.courant.com/news/politics/hc-charla-nash-hearing-20140321,0,6614602.story
Is it her fault or the fault of the state?
no one answered my drama question.
I have had this before Rebecca Creek Bourbon from the hill country of Texas is still quite tasty.
Carry on
If your best friend has a 200 lb chimp, wouldn’t it be your responsibility to learn something about chimps?
* scrolls up *
Vmax, I pissed off RFH and it looks like she may have quit us for a while.
I made a stupid comment with stupid timing,
I agree Scott
The state did not rip her face off.
The state merely approved a citizen have a animal.
Kind of like a building permit.
The state approves plans, and conducts inspections, but is not responsible for contractors lying and not building to code.
After all these years Scott, you and Romy are both highly respected and trusted. I am certain that perhaps badly chosen words can be forgiven by a big hearted, smart, and good person as Romy. Especially as you say you chose your words badly.
I hope so.
Obamajob is getting me up early tomorrow.
Good night.
Did she not sue the owner of the chimp?
good night my friend.
I am taking Blake to a show and tell tomorrow, so I will be gone most of the day pimping him out.
The chimp has no dinero, the taxpayers of the state are flush Sean.
Scott, your question is nuanced, and I really hate it when I have to say that. Both sides have fault. Ms. Nash chose to interact with a wild animal. Yes, it was a pet and had no real history of aggression (of which I’m aware, anyway), but chimps are not domesticated, and they can and do revert to instinctive, feral behavior without warning. So, Ms Nash bears a lot of responsibility here.
That said, the State passes and enforces animal control laws for the safety of the general population. Ms. Nash is a member of that population and was entitled to the protection afforded by laws controlling the public’s potential exposure to dangerous wild animals. State agents knew of the animal, they knew of the danger it posed, and they did nothing to mitigate the danger. Not only did the state not remove the animal, it did not publicize the animal’s danger to potential victims. The animal’s vicious attack was foreseeable, and the state, which holds ultimate authority, failed to act to prevent injury to Ms. Nash and the public at large – remember, an attack could have happened to anyone who happened to cross the animal’s path..
IMHO, the State bears ultimate responsibility for allowing the circumstances taht led to Nash’s injuries. There would be no injury if the agents of the state had done their jobs correctly and with diligence.The veil of immunity should not protect the state from negligence. I get why a state agent’s discretionary acts are immunized, but failure to carry out mandatory acts – like enforcement of feral/exotic animal laws – should allow those harmed by that failure to go without any kind of restitution.
WALL OF TEXT!!!!!
should NOT
allowconsign those harmed….Maybe Scott can smoke that chimp.
Easy, ready, willing, overtime
Where does it derp
Where do you dare me
To draw the line?
smoke smoke smoke
smoke that chimpanzee
I linked the pro-communist NASA-funded study earlier this week, so it might have been partly me. I thought I made it clear that I was bitching that the money was going to this crap and NOT to Roamy, but maybe I messed that up.
It’s all your fault and there is a new poat.