Here at Big Boob Friday, we strive to provide you with the most questionable alluring amateur content on the tittyweb jenkins. Clearly, this week is no exception. Well, except for the alluring part, but even so, that leaves us with content. And what’s a blog without content? It’s a pretty shitty blog, thou pribbling fat-kidneyed, flap dragons. That’s what it is.
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I wrote this song after inhaling a bottle of ether, taking the bad blotter acid, and ingesting a handful of the officially licensed H2 Blue Pills™. I was contemplating the fact that Dave was a bit prescient in his assessment of the DoJ’s involvement in the Rayovac trial that may light up the Florida sky whilst the screaming, permanently aggrieved peoples, burn down their own shit. Dave was right. Fuck.
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This bishface’s name is Estelle Taylor. I’m pretty sure she’s been featured on this hallowed site before, but they’re titties, not compos’ soccer practice underwear. In other words, she isn’t wrecked, stinking, and for single use only. She gets pretty naked, but not splayed out. A link to her tasteful nudes.
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I know! Instead of taking a test this week, lets look at a few historical facts with links embedded in them that will only make sense if you take the officially licensed H2 Red Pills™!!!!!11!! (It’s the same shit, morons)!!!!!111!!!1!1!
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1470 – The Ottomans capture Euboea.
1543 – King Henry VIII of England marries his sixth and last wife, Catherine Parr, at Hampton Court Palace.
1561 – Saint Basil’s Cathedral in Moscow is consecrated.
1776 – Captain James Cook begins his third voyage.
1812 – War of 1812: the United States invade Canada at Windsor, Ontario.
1948 – Arab–Israeli War: Israeli Prime Minister David Ben-Gurion orders the explusion of Palestinians from the towns of Lod and Ramla.
1962 – The Rolling Stones perform their first ever concert, at the Marquee Club in London, England, United Kingdom.
1967 – The Newark riots began in Newark, New Jersey.
2013–Soccer remains the gayest sport on the planet.
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Home of Tekashi 6ix9ine since March 2009 
Bask in the awesomeness that is old school BBF.
Good morning all!
Even you MJ. Thanks for early bewbs, I can scan the links quicker here than work (where I don’t dare) and camp (slow internet tubez).
Did you see the story about Bieber stepping on the Blackhawks logo? Read it somewhere. Apparently it’s a sin that’s well known except for some assholes.
Off to work. Double knee day.
Uh, thanks. I think.
*Sniff, Sniff* HEY! I think I smell Milk! Anybody got any elbow lubricant for “The Boss”? I suspect he will be needing it soon!.
Drat! I hate Alarm Clocks! Off to MouseHunt…
If there was only a “Wakey-Wakey” we could depend on…
Slackers.
wakey wakey
Today is going to suck. That is all.
Just make sure you’re packing heat.
Good morning, cool kids.
Old skool bewbs indeed!
SOX!!!!
Welcome home, buddy! Great to see you!! Hope you get to stick around for a while!!! You left without making coffee?? Bastage.
SOX!
Nice to hear from you, hope things are going well.
>> Just make sure you’re packing heat.
always
Morning children.
She seems nice!
She said heat, Dave.
Interestingly enough, I will be. Huh.
Still gonna suck.
I doubt we get a verdict today. Do juries get weekends off?
Nice work on the linkies, MJ!
Agree with Pups, no verdict today. Yes, weekends off.
Verdict Pool: Tuesday, before lunch
Hahahaha. I was just thinking that a verdict would be better during the week so that the potential rioters would be at work. I’m so naive.
Bahahaha!
*pats MJ on the head*
That’s so cute… rioters… working…
Classic BBF. I bet there’s a pic of her dusting the bed somewhere.
**leaves catnip behind the Safe Couch (TM) for Sox**
O’Meara is presenting his closing now – so very refreshing not to hear the attorney shout and to present actual evidence. Such a contrast.
My dream is that a verdict comes back in five minutes.
If I’m on the jury I want off this circus train before the wreck.
Five minutes would be awesome, but let’s face it: it’s a female jury.
We don’t do anything in five minutes.
Hahahahaha
Point.
*gives Hotspur “The Elbow to the Ribs”*
Moar, please.
Wait… once wasn’t enough?!
how YOU doin’
“Nobody’s jugs are bigger than their nets.”
/Danny Zucko
I don’t see how an all-female jury can constitute “peers” to a man. I’d appeal their verdict on that alone and cite any all-male-jury/female-defendant cases as precedent (you know there’s at least one).
What leon said.
YOU DON’T KNOW MY STRUGGLE, WIMMENFOLK!
Maybe it’s just me, but that ‘too little bikini top’ is not sexy. Neither are udders on a stick figure.
Too buggy out this morning. Had to stop weeding.
*scratches mosquito bite on thumb.
I like my skinny skanks with big jugs like I like my female German tourists at the Beach….covered from head to toe.
That goes for male German tourists in speedos, too.
I wonder if Obama will deploy the National Guard to protect the rioters…
hahaha…all women and Jimbro liked this post.
There is something so wrong with all of us….hahahah
Or Jimbro.
hahaha…Or all females here.
*I think that’s understood
Ha, I’m in good company with the Hostagettes. Knees are fixt and soon the weekend begins.
I liked my own post cuz that’s how I roll.
I might do this this weekend, it looks like fun for the whole family!!
http://tinyurl.com/m3mg9eq
Why spend the money, mare, when fingers are free!
Hey MJ, Mila likes your post, or she has the hiccups.
http://naughty-butt-nice.tumblr.com/post/47355090429
Doctors’ offices suck.
That is all.
pepe, it looks like she’s going to hurl.
So how did Sharknado end?
I realize I don’t deserve to know because I could not make myself sit through the whole thing, but somebody give me a break.
*rolls MJ*
So how did Sharknado end?
It turned out that the humans were part of a government program to sacrifice them in order to appease the elder gods. The sharknado was the method of their distruction chosen when Tara Reid’s character read from the Necrosharkicon.
Thanks Alex. Nice to know there is one sympathetic person around here, and I should have guessed it would be a kind-hearted Coloradan like you.
so, funny story.
About 5 years ago, I signed up for UVerse. When they show up at my house to install it, first question is “where’s your phone line.”
I don’t have a line running to my house, as it was cut when we did the addition and it’s now under 2 inches of concrete in my garage and I use Vonage so I never had a new line run.
So the whole deal dies (seems AT&T has trouble running phone lines or something) and I never did get Uverse.
Few weeks ago, guy shows up to get me to sign up for UVerse.
I say “This is gonna be a short conversation. I don’t have a phone line.”
“Oh, no problem,” he says, “we’ll run one for you at no charge.”
Okay.
Guy shows up today to install UVerse.
First question: “Where’s your phone line?”
“Don’t have one.”
“Oh, that’s gonna be a problem.”
Michael,
The ending was EPIC, it did a great job of bringing all of the interwoven storylines into one cohesive and emotionally satisfying conclusion. I wept.
Nah, it was as cheesy as cheesy gets. Really, really wanted Tara Reid to be shark food. I was reading the less profane comments from Ace’s live blog to my daughters during the movie and they were laughing like crazy.
This morning the 16 yr old said, “Dad, please tell me you recorded Sharknado’.
Oh hell yes I did.
At least Sharknado was better than the Cards/Cubs game.
I looked up uverse t’other day when you told that story the first time anticipating this result wiser. It looks pretty good. CT is one of the only NE states that can get it or so the map leads me to believe.
“Oh, that’s gonna be a problem.”
*facepalm*
NOBODY SPOIL SHARKNADO!
I’m waiting to watch it tonight on the DVR.
It’s times like this when I remember that people like Michael used to work for them and it all makes sense.
I’m hoping for repeat showings of Sharknado so I can watch it with the kids. That’s a movie that deserves commentary from two, soon to be, 15 and 10 yo boys.
Painfully, sadly, so very true…only the best and brightest!!
SMART DIPLOMACY!!!
http://www.powerlineblog.com/archives/2013/07/john-kerry-still-clueless-after-all-these-years.php
This is my representation of Kerry’s Smart Diplomacy:
http://tinyurl.com/mxtz7x4
HA! This is why cats will someday rule the world:
http://tinyurl.com/mygenqa
They. Don’t. Care.
Heh. Sucker head. (Dave?)
“Oh, that’s gonna be a problem.”
*shocked face*
Cat Scratch Fever
Dave’s A LOT smarter than Kerry.
Don’t take this incorrectly, but so is that cat.
Dave’s A LOT smarter than Kerry.
Maybe Kerry Marie….
Wiser, I read my daughter that comment you made about Vick’s cough drops after I asked about Vicksburg and she LOL’d. Good one, douche!
Have the hostages covered this already? Because seriously, this is funny shit. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ipV2u-MxlFc
oh and hi everyone
First question: “Where’s your phone line?”
“Don’t have one.”
“Oh, that’s gonna be a problem.”
My ex installs uverse for a living
Good one, douche!
I’d like to thank the Acadamy and my writers and my director, Susan (I LOVE YOU, SUSAN!!!) and all of the fans who continue to support me throughout the years.
YOU LIKE ME! YOU REALLY, REALLY LIKE ME!
HA!
Wiser cracked up a teenager?
My ex installs uverse for a living
every day, little by little, so much is becoming clearer and clearer….
Uh huh
Because seriously, this is funny shit.
You can’t pay me enough to watch anything with Will Farrell in it.
Wiser cracked up a teenager?
it helps if you think like a teenager to begin with.
fine. watch this one………..is crispin glover too offensive for you?
Greetings, people who quaintly cling to notions of “evidence” and “the law.”
fine. watch this one……
yawn…
She’s 21!
So no.
you know, if you hold your hand up to your computer screen in just the right way (that would be in a way that covers her face) today’s BBF gal is not that bad to look at.
She’s 21!
how YOU doin’?
At first, I just saw the headline that Big Sis was quitting DHS. Then I read further and saw that she’s going to be heading up the UC system.
I think my streak of not donating any money is safe.
Wiser, I get so proud of you when you notice that women have faces. It shows growth on your part.
Apparently, when wiser sees her face, the growth on his, um…part… stops.
CT is one of the only NE states that can get it
That’s because AT&T bought what used to be Southern New England Telephone Company, and SNET only covered part of the state, so there are areas in CT that you can’t get it. Everything else around there is Verizon territory, and you’re stuck with FIOS as an alternative to cable or satellite.
FWIW, I’m unhappily stuck with FIOS too (I could get U-verse for free), because in the part of DFW that used to be GTE territory and is now Verizon. U-verse really is a better service (and, for the company, much more capital efficient than Verizon’s dumb architecture). Cathy has U-verse now and likes it a lot better.
Greetings, people who quaintly cling to notions of “evidence” and “the law.”
Sean is so funny with these openings but they also make me weep with their truth.
Our Uverse has been really good.
It shows growth on your part.
baby steps, talking eyeball. baby steps.
My ex installs uverse for a living
Actually, the easy part is done in the field by the guys with trucks. The hard part is done by the techs back at the loop assignment center who have to coordinate about a dozen major programs (many of them obsolete) and databases in order to make SyFy show up at your house. I actually got trained for this job when we were preparing for a strike. It is way more complicated than you would imagine.
Greetings, people who quaintly cling to notions of “evidence” and “the law.”
Sean is so funny with these openings but they also make me weep with their truth.
He’s uh may zing
baby steps, talking eyeball. baby steps.
Don’t change too much, sweetling. I love you just the way you are. *winks* *clicks*
I love the PJM/Wiser exchanges. Don’t go away again.
Comment by Michael on July 12, 2013 12:43 pm
CT is one of the only NE states that can get it
That’s because AT&T bought what used to be Southern New England Telephone Company, and SNET only covered part of the state, so there are areas in CT that you can’t get it. Everything else around there is Verizon territory, and you’re stuck with FIOS as an alternative to cable or satellite.
FWIW, I’m unhappily stuck with FIOS too (I could get U-verse for free), because in the part of DFW that used to be GTE territory and is now Verizon. U-verse really is a better service (and, for the company, much more capital efficient than Verizon’s dumb architecture). Cathy has U-verse now and likes it a lot better.
Actually, the easy part is done in the field by the guys with trucks. The hard part is done by the techs back at the loop assignment center who have to coordinate about a dozen major programs (many of them obsolete) and databases in order to make SyFy show up at your house. I actually got trained for this job when we were preparing for a strike. It is way more complicated than you would imagine.
And by the way, Wiser, it was almost certainly somebody at the LAC who screwed up your order, which should have been flagged to show that you needed a drop installed from the nearest pedestal, which means outside plant construction needs to get done first before they dispatched a Uverse installer. That’s a different process. They have a systems which should have queued all that up. It can get done, but nobody should have told you it would be done on Friday.
Happy Birthday, Michael. M’wah!
OK, Cyn, I’m being pedantic.
But be fair. Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better in the last 30 years than the revolutionary changes in the telecom industry. Most people just take it for granted. They don’t know or think about the blood, sweat and tears that made it happen.
I love the PJM/Wiser exchanges. Don’t go away again.
I feel pressure……..
oh wait, Michael’s post put me to sleep.
And by the way, Wiser, it was almost certainly somebody at the LAC who screwed up your order, which should have been flagged to show that you needed a drop installed from the nearest pedestal
The last time this happened, the first guy made a bunch of phone calls to get everything straightened out. He also said it was “only” going to cost me $3k to run the line.
I said “nyope! Ain’t gonna cost me a penny, or we don’t have a deal anymore.”
He says “Okay, we’ll get it taken care of.”
Couple of weeks go by and nothing happens. No one shows up at the house. Nothing.
Then I get a call on a Saturday morning. “I’m going to be there in 30 minutes to hook up your UVerse.”
First question when he arrives: “Where’s your phone line?”
I beginning to see a pattern here…..
I feel pressure……..
You’re pre-shart.
I love the PJM/Wiser exchanges.
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
Mankinis?
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
Mocha Frappachinos.
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
Sharknado.
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
KY?
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
Diet Dr Pepper. It tastes more like regular.
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
Eggos
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
Gunpowder
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
Fleshlight
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
Latex.
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
The end of racism.
AC. AC is the most important invention in the history of the world! EVER!!!
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
Your mom.
think about the blood, sweat and tears that made it happen
The TPS reports, the cover pages, the memos, the executive summaries.
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
Charlie the Unicorn. I don’t even need to put a question mark after that. It’s fact.
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
Flavored Vodka
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
Fried cheese
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
Online P0rn.
I heard.
http://xbradtc.com/2013/07/12/where-is-my-army-wife-pay/
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
Asian porn with real Asian chicks instead of just Mexican chicks with extra eye makeup on.
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
indoor plumbing
Online pr0n counts as part of the telecom industry.
So, cocksucker Jeb Bush appointed the judge in the Zimmerman trial to the bench.
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
large, black dildos
I know seeing Michael perform with one certainly changed my world permanently.
… oh… wait…
You said “for the better.”
Never mind.
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
Rachel Corrie getting run over by a bulldozer
Heh, O’Mara pauses for 4 minutes of silence to illustrate the 4 mins missing from the prosecution’s timeline of events:
http://www.breitbart.com/InstaBlog/2013/07/12/Zimmerman-Trial-The-Sound-of-Silence
That’s just brilliant.
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
http://tinyurl.com/cxso5fj
I need to try one of those, pupster. The other ones were ok.
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
Obama, duh.
xbrad,
Why does the stupidity and narcissism burn so much? It makes me sad inside.
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
the printing press
Rachel Corrie getting run over by a bulldozer
laughing out loud at work is dangerous sometimes…….I really don’t enjoy having to explain what amused me.
Online pr0n counts as part of the telecom industry.
And has probably done more to destroy Japan than Truman’s little firecrackers ever did.
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
Fan fiction
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
bacon
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
The copper pot still.
laughing out loud at work is dangerous sometimes…….I really don’t enjoy having to explain what amused me.
“Oh, I was just laughing about someone getting killed by construction equipment. No, no, it’s okay…she deserved it.”
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
Pop Tarts
Aaaaaaaaand… No UVerse installed. Need to run a line to our house from “up around the corner.”
I said “you know, we used to have a phone line and our neighbors have UVerse…”
nope, need to run a line from “up around the corner.”
This is hilarious.
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
Corona.
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
Playboy
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
Flavored popcorn.
Oh Leon……..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rhAc4sY-5×0
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
Ice
I said “you know, we used to have a phone line and our neighbors have UVerse…”
nope, need to run a line from “up around the corner.”
This is hilarious.
My parent’s house is on the same property as ours. AT&T couldn’t give them uverse, but could give it to us. Their house was new. SAME PROPERTY!!!
this is great. so they are going to have to tear up the entire street to run a line to my house so I can access the comments at the H2 faster.
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
BBF
Penelope goes to a book sale at the local library……
Sees a woman pick up a book on Jimmy Carter.
Woman: I just loved him.
Random Man: I interned for him when he was governor.
Woman: How wonderful.
Man: He was a great man, and did so many wonderful things for the country.
Woman: I know, he’s amazing.
Penelope: WTF????? Steps away from the crazy……
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
Ice
Ice, Baby
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
Gluten.
I don’t need this abuse. I’m going to lay out in the pool and sulk for awhile. You can all just find someone else to edumacate your parochial stunted unLutheran rightwing cracker minds.
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
The Counter-Reformation
Oh Leon……..
An excellent reminder that women shouldn’t lift heavy weights because it will make them bulky and unattractive.
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
rufies
I would quit the internet before giving AT&T a dime.
I hate them.
They just sign us up for stuff we don’t want and bill us. When we call to get the charges dropped they want proof, in writing, that we didn’t request what they bill us for.
8 months will go by and the cycle repeats.
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
huh. As it turns out.. this thread now qualifies
I’m going to lay out in the pool and sulk for awhile.
I would quit the internet before giving AT&T a dime.
It doesn’t look like it’s gonna happen here anytime soon either.
This is an exact repeat of what happened 5 years ago.
I bet we fall off their order list real fast.
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
Viagra
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
Tubal ligation
If you leave a Tabasco Slim Jim in a hot truck for a week or so they get really mushy.
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
KITTEHS!
Ice
Ice, Baby
Ice? Wow. Thanks for getting us on the government’s watch list because you used a trigger word. Good job, dickhead.
Yes, Wiser is again correct, Kettehs.
“Man: He was a great man, and did so many wonderful things for the country.”
Name one.
Ice? Wow. Thanks for getting us on the government’s watch list because you used a trigger word. Good job, dickhead.
FUCK YOU, ICE!
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
Total
“Man: He was a great man, and did so many wonderful things for the country.”
Name one.
Getting Ronald Reagan elected.
Deodorant
Nailed it, Sean!!
Woman: I just loved him.
Random Man: I interned for him when he was governor.
They were both wearing hemp clothing, weren’t they?
I have a hemp shirt.
Holy crap is it going to be hot next week.
Close to 100 for much of the week.
I have a hemp shirt.
… says the man who drinks Mount Gay.
Dave’s A LOT smarter than Kerry.
Oh, without a doubt. I just thought the sucker stuck to the forehead was a Dave sort of cute.
Yikes – that will be brutal for you peeps, Scott.
That is too hot, Scott! Will you guys have time to go swimming?
..”the extraordinary pictures show Hitler rehearsing while listening to a recording of one of his own speeches..”
If Obama had a son, he’d look like Adolf.
http://tinyurl.com/qdg2duc
[i]
If you leave a Tabasco Slim Jim in a hot truck for a week or so they get really mushy.[/i]
*reminds self to avoid road trips with DiT*
Fucking Pixy.
Ice? Wow. Thanks for getting us on the government’s watch list because you used a trigger word. Good job, dickhead.
My dear, we were already on their watch list.
I’m just gonna set this here. http://littlewhitelion.com/18-tips-for-morons-32631/
Comment by George Orwell on July 12, 2013 3:19 pm
Fucking Pixy.
Keep your bedroom antics to yourself, please.
I think so Oso.
The water is too cold for Laura right now. Next week should fix that.
I’m just gonna set this here. http://littlewhitelion.com/18-tips-for-morons-32631/
No you’re not. You’re going to pick that up right this instant, missy, and put it back where it belongs.
Behold my tinfoil hat.
{:-)
I’ve had nightmares about that ‘no left turn’ road up in the clouds.
Hope you get some time together.
The water is too cold for Laura right now.
http://tinyurl.com/ls699cr
We’re gonna get a break for a few days on Sunday, mid to upper 80s
The water is too cold for Laura right now.
http://tinyurl.com/kemwscg
Beasns’s new avatard looks, um… clean??
[i]Beasns’s new avatard looks, um… clean??[/i]
That’s either the bell end of an apple or a very odd navel.
Q:-|
I’m Davy Fucking Crockett
I think it’s a cracker.
Jeebus on a CSS style sheet, I’m spending way too much time at Ace.
Do you know what would be better than SHARKNADO?
The animated Lego remake.
Claymation would be awesome too.
No! Wait!!!
.
*whispers*
Silly Putty
I think it’s a cracker.
I think it’s a cracker.
DING DING DING!
I’m standing with Z.
Mine is a Club cracker.
*sniffs*
Chicken in a Biskit is better.
Behold, the anime version of SHARKNADO!
http://is.gd/9tAvEA
http://www.theatlantic.com/business/archive/2013/07/sorry-twitter-sharknado-was-an-enormous-ratings-bust/277759/
But what about those of us who didn’t send any tweets? HMMMMM?
FORBIDDEN!
DVRs, man, it’ll be the most-watched thing in SyFy history.
That surprises me about the ratings bust.
Then again, I only watched the first five minutes and the last 30.
Is it a cracker ass?
Is it a cracker ass?
Creepy.
Haboob Is Coming. Batten down your hatches, people.
That is all.
Heh, was I right about the last 30 minutes?
Haboob? Is that like a half boob?
HABOOBNADO!
Absolutely, Jay. Your laughter at the end was the only reason I decided to watch.
Worth every penny.
Nailed it, George.
It’s Here! It’s Here! And we might actually get some rain after this suckah too. Finally.
Then again, I only watched the first five minutes and the last 30.
Did they shoot the dog?
A habooby from last year: http://youtu.be/aW_h2pHwXf4
Did they shoot the dog?
Kilt him daid. Twice.
A habooby from last year: http://youtu.be/aW_h2pHwXf4
Nice nipple.
Try to name anything that has more dramatically and permanently changed the world for the better…
Nips
Dang, this is gonna be a good storm. Lots of thunder and lightning in the distance, and our temps will drop about 10-15º.
HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
http://www.collegehumor.com/article/6889842/if-congress-got-stuff-done-like-roommates
l’il somethin’ for the ladies….
http://hypervocal.com/news/2013/firefighter-rescues-kitten/
D’awwwwwww
That College Humor thing is funny.
McLame and Biden – hahaha!
Our new barn kitties were dropped off last night. I’m yet to meet the female as she is very shy. The male is friendly enough that I’m worried my wife is going to pressure me to make him a house cat. He’s also very cute, but both spent some time with the Humane Society, and they now apparently dock one ear when they neuter/spay an animal, so he’ll have that oddity for life.
We named them Klaus and Helga.
KITTEHS!
http://purrpurr.org/catflakes/
“…and they now apparently dock one ear when they neuter/spay an animal,”
Yeah, do gooders NEVER do anything cruel or unnecessary.
Helga?
I wouldn’t come out either.
…and they now apparently dock one ear when they neuter/spay an animal…
That’s real retarded, sir.
Nice of you to get some cats from the Humane Society. But aren’t there tons of cats around anyway? There always seems to be a cat wandering around my ‘rents place, and they’ve never gone out to get one.
Mare, I tried not to laugh when it occurred to me that it was “just the tip”. At the very least, I got two cats for the barn with all their shots and none of their gonads. The ear thing is just creepy.
couldn’t they just tattoo “FIXED” on their little foreheads?
Mmmm….. Donuts!
http://tinyurl.com/l82fadb
Fuck the Humane Society. I’m a capitalist.
Jay, my neighbors’ cats are pretty good about keeping to their territories. Mrs. Caruthers didn’t want to wait for fate to bless us, so she went on Craigslist and searched for “barn cats” specifically, so we’d be likely to get some hardy, partially-feral animals.
I really had nothing to do with the getting of them. Grieving wife and all. Now I just have to establish a rapport and try not to hit them with the car or the mower.
Docking the ear actually is good for the animal. It helps indicate at a glance that the feral cat has been fixed and that there is someone caring for it. Makes it easier for animal control.
Builders and developers plant more trees in the US than all other entities combined.
The humane societies kill more animals in the US than all other entities combined.
Who are the darlings of the left? Yeah, thought you might want to rethink that.
As I understand it, there are now more trees in North America than there were when the pilgrims arrived.
Of course, it helps that we don’t practice slash&burn agriculture like the natives did, and that we didn’t burn them all that much for fuel after we found all the coal.
>> As I understand it, there are now more trees in North America than there were when the pilgrims arrived.
A hundred and fifty years ago most of Texas and Oklahoma were open plains. Cattle drives spread tree seeds.
Oh.
My.
God.
Absolutely classic example of just how stupid news people are:
Robber barons were among the first American conservationists.
Going to work. Ciao!
There’s something about her reading the names that makes it extra funny.
“Goodnight San Diego. Go fuck yourself.”
You know what the whistle dick media never reports when they claim Zimmerman followed Martin because he was black?
Zimmerman claimed on the tape that Martin was looking in windows. He wasn’t suspicious because he was black. He was suspicious because he was looking in windows.
Unfortunately that doesn’t fit their scripted racism.
Hotspur,
I’m of the opinion that Martin was looking for a target of opportunity as he walked home. That’s also why he turned back to face Zimmerman: he knew that if he tried anything later that the police would come knocking around, so he was planning to beat up Zimmerman to keep him from “snitching”.
I’m with you, Alex. But that idea causes the angelic child’s halo to slip.
I finished Transfer of Power. Excellent climax.
Now I’m listening to The Third Option.
I love this shit.
Vince Flynn is not Daniel Silva, but he’s still damn good.
“I finished Transfer of Power. Excellent climax.”
You’re doing it wrong.
When you get to be my age and stage of the game, you take what you can get. Or so MCPO advised me.
Mare, stop scaring the children!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yAuO3GnjCEM&feature=youtu.be&t=40s
This was at Ace’s sidebar and I think Pups has linked it but I love the look on the dog’s face, “Man, what I do for you people.”
I’ve never scared children.
Afternoon.
I’m so sick of erectile dysfunction commercials, I’ll kill myself if we start talking about that here. Eat a good diet (low fat is crap), exercise, don’t drink too much, and got off any meds you’re not exactly sure you need.
For those of you whose wieners were shot up in the war, I sincerely apologize. You get a pass.
We bought these today.
http://www.aetrex.com/categories/Orthotics/Sport-400-Series/
They are worth every penny.
Today I built nineteen (19) of these:
http://tinyurl.com/bm49fw2
(but only the dented part)
and two (2) of these:
http://tinyurl.com/aovntoe
Cinnabons!
I have to admit it, Jewstin’s coworker comments about his girlfriend sicken me, however, I’m sort of fascinated about how scum operate their lives.
How do you like Texas Mare? How long have you been there?
ED is curable by better diet, exercise, and hotter partners (not kidding), and avoiding statin drugs.
Cinnabons!
You rang?
Unless there was a prostatectomy. Then ED is pretty much terminal.
Leon, you said what I said but in a more scientific manner. I almost said something about hotter partners but some Hostages have been happily married to the same partner for a long time and I didn’t want to insult anyone.
Ho Lee Fuk! I just had a crisis on one of my files and had to tell the apartment complex insured to call the Sheriff’s office.
Sum Ting Wong?
Scott, I’m torn.
On the one hand, I’ve never lived around nicer, more polite adults or children. You can, without reservation, talk about God, guns and whatever else you want. Great cost of living, good politics, good common sense government.
On the other hand, when you’ve lived some of the places I have, living in the center of a VERY hot state, without an ocean close, well, I know I shouldn’t complain but I’d move in a second.
My husband goes a little cross eyed when I’ve touched on the subject.
You rang?
Those proofers with three doors are called Cinnabons. We make them just for you.
Oh, and we’ve lived here 3 years.
One of their tenants has made an injury claim. The apartment manager forwarded me an email from the super despondent and wacked-out tenant. I tried to reach the tenant’s atty, but he was out of the country. I was able to talk to the manager and she was going to go knock on wack-job’s door; I said, ‘Oh no you don’t! You have no idea what he might do. Call the Sheriff’s office to do a well check.’
Just got an email that the Sheriff was already there.
Wow.
Any nice lakes within driving distance? That might help.
We make them just for you.
You are too good to me, Jew.
I’m not really a lake person (I know, I know, I sound spoiled and I probably am) but brown water and icky lake bottoms give me the creeps. Lake Grapevine is very close, very, but I’ve never seen anyone swim in it besides Mexican families at the State Park.
Mare, to quote:
A recent study examined the sex lives of men and women in the Czech Republic aged 35-65. The individuals provided their age, waist size, and their partner’s age. Amongst other things, they answered the widely used 5-item International Index of Erectile Function (IIEF-5).
Under a multiple regression model, 24% of erectile function could be accounted for by the man’s age, 16% by his partner’s age, and 10% by the partner’s waist size (the effect of the man’s waist size was not statistically significant). In other words, the woman’s age and waist size were as important as the man’s age in determining erectile function.
From here.
Cynna has a great set of bons.
I’m sort of fascinated about how scum operate their lives.
M. is pretty much a degenerate, but he’s funny as hell. We have a blast.
I just wish he would wear a full body condom for those occasions when we come into contact.
Mare, not all lakes are icky.
We have one nearby that is sandy and clear as any ocean, visibility of 35+ feet.
Underwater visibility at our beaches is 6 feet on a good day.
The lake Laura and I go to is a bit of a mix. Partial sand, partial goo, but the water is clean (old reservoir), the surroundings are beautiful and we usually have it to ourselves.
Also, Manticore is tall and scrawny, so C. has taken to calling her Geoffrey as in Geoffrey.
The deal was when we moved here we’d travel a lot and get out of the heat, we’ve mostly done that but life gets in the way and with a sort of job change we’ve had to adjust. It’s all good.
I never really thought much about it but liberals own America’s coastline.
If you live near an ocean you have to live with idiots.
You can’t have everything.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FVLx3VrRQPY
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZwipCJoWpsQ
Remember SOS cat? He’s got company
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dHmI_ftqONM
Where has MCPO been? Somebody should question his integrity.
Bish been rode hard and put up wet. I’ve seen better looking hookers 3 days before payday at the docks in Naples, Italy.
Ha.
Ask and you shall receive. . .
I noticed a couple weeks ago that people are getting police escorts to my bank to make deposits. I couldn’t figure out who in town was making so much money that they needed police escorts to make a deposit.
I saw it today and zoomed in on the deposit bag.
TOWN OF………………..
Fucking property tax.
You ain’t got no. . .
We get a book mailed to us once a year from the town listing everyone’s property taxes along with who still owes. It’s actually got a lot of other interesting stuff in it including the articles for the town meeting.
Somewhere, Dave’s foot is going spastic.
Scott – Any good bass line makes Dave spastic!
Vodka too.
>> Underwater visibility at our beaches is 6 feet on a good day.
9 feet is pretty dark. Personal experience.
Mare, I don’t blame you. It’s hotter than hell here in the summertime. I’m used to it, but I didn’t move here from Hawaii a couple years ago, I been here (and in the south) all my life.
I take my summers, cause I get my winters. Plus I have a pool. And the water is crystal clear.
*has giant foot spasm*
also
http://is.gd/4L5cC2
I listening to this: http://youtu.be/zmPzbZVUp3g
Did anybody feed anybody else to the Sarlacc today?
oh youbitch
“listening to this: http://youtu.be/zmPzbZVUp3g”
Mare needs this.
I was thinking the exact same thing, Scott.
oh youbitch
Is he that Japanese-Serbian pitcher on the Rangers?
I was giving Cyn the stinkeye, not you Shawn
ocean sounds. Fuck the ocean
Of course, it helps that we don’t practice slash&burn agriculture like the natives did . . .
Actually, the Scotch/Irish hillbillies in Appalachia wrecked their land, so they went to Texas and were the first to successfully contend with the dreaded Comanche, who actually controlled the territory (the Spanish presence was token).
*ignores stinkeye, instead imagines inhaling the fragrances of a relaxing ocean mist*
Comment by mare on July 12, 2013 6:34 pm
I’ve never scared children.
======
You’re missing out on tons of fun. 😉
Daaaa-ave! Watch out for the undertoad!
Well dang, a child from Flight 214 succumbed to her injuries.
minx
I was giving Cyn the stinkeye, not you Shawn
It hadn’t even occurred to me, you DIRTY MOTHERFUCKER!!!!!
minx
yeah, you are.
http://tinyurl.com/llznw6n
DaveinTexas – You enjoying your pool this weekend?
Mare – Let’s go camping!
http://is.gd/sNiwSL
Mare! Don’t do it! It’s a trap!!
Ooooo even better surf sounds with gorgeous beach, looks like islands… http://youtu.be/rv8TUyAhdYs
Beautiful…This may be where I’d like to take my last breath…
MCPO, Hells. Yes.
Now I miss the coconut bra
This may be where I’d like to take my last breath…
Make sure it’s on the beach part, and not the underwater part, or that will be terrifying for you.
Now I miss the coconut bra
Me too.
*looks off into the distance*
I wonder if I could p’shop that onto my tigerwoman…
The screaming, the terror. . .
Make sure it’s on the beach part, and not the underwater part, or that will be terrifying for you.
It’s my party and I’ll die if I want to, die if I want tooooo
Wait a minute — Mare lives in Grapevine?
That means her house, mine and Cathy’s form a triangle around DFW airport. Maybe Cathy and I can execute flanking maneouvers from the east and west, flush her out onto a runway, and see what she actually looks like.
*checks map*
It could work. The lake will deny her an easy escape to the north.
You’re forgetting that Mare is a sockpuppet of MJ.
MareJ. See?!
Maybe Cathy and I can execute flanking maneouvers from the east and west, flush her out onto a runway, and see what she actually looks like.
Women who prize their innernet anonymity that much usually turn out to be fat guys.
So I guess the jurors in teh Rayovac-Zipperman case actually ARE going to deliberate over the weekend. I steered you wrong Pupster.
I’d never heard of that before, then again, if I were sequestered, I would want to get home post toasties quick too.
Yes, they start tomorrow.
I am missing the ocean now. Thanks guys! /Sarc
The ocean here is so cold, even in August, that you can get hypothermia from prolonged immersion. Luckily the lobsters don’t seem to mind.
People from out of town are always shocked by how cold the ocean is here in SoCal. There WILL be shrinkage.
When I lived in New Hampshire I went to that cold ocean Jimbro. Fortunately by the time I was knee deep in it my feet froze and broke off.
I would have died but some innocent bystander in a dry suit was able to rescue me. She bravely went back into the water and returned my frozen feet to me. A little superglue and I was fine.
I did manage to put my left foot on my right leg. You know how fast superglue sets to skin.. At least it is pointing the right direction.
It was 80 in Aug too. I swear I saw icebergs on the horizon.
As a kid I always swam in any water my folks brought me to. In college and beyond the beach was just an excuse to drink beer and ogle bikini-clad wimmins. Fuck salt(water).
reft reg on light reg joke here
Well Jimbro seeing as no one else is around the clubhouse try one of these. I have 2 Romeo Y Julietta 1875 Reserva Real that are begging to be smoked
Cyn won’t mind the smell in the morning. Carin might but don’t tell her it was me and I won’t tell on u.
I don’t go in the ocean. There are monsters in there.
Do U swim in the great lakes Leon?
On a hot day of fishing there is nothing like jumping into 1000′ deep water and sinking as far down as U can to the cool cool thermocline (or is it clime?)
Like u don’t drink fish pee every day. And monsters are under ur bed not in the ocean.
I have not intentionally gone into the ocean since 1976. My favorite place to be is the beach.
The biggest animal in the great lakes is a fat chick from Wisconsin, Zman. I’m not worried about the pee, I’m worried about sharktapus.
It’s weird out in the middle of Lake Michigan where the top 18″ of water is very warm, and then there’s an instant thermocline of cold water. Your nipples are warm, and your toes are cold.
I have swum with agitated Bull Sharks and lived to tell about it. When I saw the arched back and down pointed fins I hightailed it out of there. But I lived to brag about it
We used to swim with sea snakes, Tiger sharks, and stinging jellyfish. I still can’t believe how stupid I was…(shudders)
When we’d swim in fresh water lagoons, we would just pull the leeches off and throw them at each other.
Was, Oso?
WAS! (At least when it comes to getting in bodies of water with scary stuff) LOL
Your nipples are warm, and your toes are cold.
*holds envelope up to turban*
Ron Kovic at the Mustang Ranch.
My pregnant niece is in the hospital again tonight about to loose her 2nd baby.
Anyone who prays please pray for H and her baby. She is renting my house Aug 1.
Prayin’ hard, Vman. My niece is struggling with hers as well, but she’s at least past the halfway point.
The water in Long Island Sound in the fall is surprisingly warm in Autumn
Praying for XB and Vman’s nieces and their babies!
You were a good sport last night dave, it was fun.
Two dozen other stupid reasons
Why we should suffer for this
Don’t bother trying to explain them
Just hold my derp while I come to a decision on it.
Big haboob Friday.
Morning children. FU WorpDress.
Good morning all!
Was up at 0530, rolled over and just got up at 8. Coffee’s brewing.
wakey wakey
I’m not really a lake person (I know, I know, I sound spoiled and I probably am) but brown water and icky lake bottoms give me the creeps. Lake Grapevine is very close, very, but I’ve never seen anyone swim in it besides Mexican families at the State Park.
Not all lakes are the same. There are all sorts. There is Clear Lake up in Michigan that is fricken unbelievable.
I like Lakes and Oceans. Up in my lakes I don’t have to worry about the under toad or things that can sting me.
http://www.michigandnr.com/parksandtrails/Details.aspx?id=442&type=SPRK
There is a rotating picture thing that shoes the lake. How blue it is, and clear. It is really amazing. THere are loons on the lake. I love it.
shows
at work, boss, etc.
gahmemeh
unh
Saturday mornings are rough. I get home after 10 pm on Friday, completely wired. Finally get to sleep around 1 am, then I’m on the schedule for the next morning.
Oh well. At least I don’t have to be there very early. Scott had to pull a 5 am shift again.
We were reviewing our schedules yesterday afternoon and realized that between our three jobs we wouldn’t see each other awake again for about 24 hours. Ha ha ha so weird, these days.
*POUNCE*
http://tinyurl.com/omeer83
Oh, and the coffee’s on too.
Laura, I’m like that. We can come home late from some event or party, and HotBride wants to fall straight into bed. Me? I’m wide awake, and won’t be ready for sleep for at least an hour. I can speed it up if I start watching a movie.
Yea, I got home at 11:30 last night and I work at 11:30 today. All day. And all day tomorrow. And all day monday. So if Pat wants to see me he has to stay up late.
Tomorrow, his family is coming over for the day. I have to work.
*cries
And last night sucked donkey balls.
I was able to hit the hay by 12:20 or so. People were up to ask me how my day went.
New powt.