A splendid idea

You know, for once I agree with TFG:

white-house-moving-van
“Fired up! Ready to go!”

And just to show that there are no hard feelings, here’s a cake for your going away party…

cake-fuck-off

Rate this:

April 30, 2013
Categories: asshole, Barack Obama, Birthday Cake, bushmcchimpyhitlerhalliburton, Chocolate, CRUNK JUICE!!!, Douche-bagger, Ed Balls, Fourth Grade, fuck you, goatse, Happy, homophobe, hopey changey shit, I feel like chicken tonight., John Galt, Kenya, Kyle, Le Luc Long, libtards, meghan mccain fat, Merry Christmas, No Drama, Politics, racist, Rocky Dennis, She-Meat, shut your whore mouth, STFU, Tastes More Like Regular, TurtleFacePlant, weiner, YOU WISH, You're gonna love my nuts, Your mom likes this . . Author: Sean M.

307 Comments

Comment by Hotspur on April 30, 2013 1:49 pm

cuntz
Comment by xbradtc on April 30, 2013 1:56 pm

I think you missed a tag or two.
Comment by Cyn on April 30, 2013 1:59 pm

Smells like teen spirit.

I don’t even know what that means.
Comment by leoncaruthers on April 30, 2013 1:59 pm

I’m happy to see more use of TurtleFacePlant.
Comment by xbradtc on April 30, 2013 2:03 pm

Dave, Combat Talon I retired:

http://www.nwfdailynews.com/military/top-story/combat-talon-is-take-a-final-bow-gallery-1.133194
Comment by Sean M. on April 30, 2013 2:03 pm

There was a tag sale.
Comment by MCPO Airdale on April 30, 2013 2:05 pm

I would gladly help to defray the cost of Mr. Obama’s move back to Chicago. *rifles through change jar & comes up with 57 cents*
Comment by Sean M. on April 30, 2013 2:08 pm

Why do you have to use a word like “rifles,” you bitter, clingy, uncivil racist?

*emails ATTACKWATCH*
Comment by leoncaruthers on April 30, 2013 2:10 pm

I used to save coins in case any of my coworkers needed some for the vending machines (and so I wouldn’t have a pocket full of them). I’ve got about $8 in change in my desk. Our building is so empty now thanks to the “recovery” that the vending machine contractor gave up on us and took out the machines, so I’m willing to donate the whole stash to help O go.
Comment by Tushar on April 30, 2013 2:15 pm

I may have a few ass-pennies stashed away that I could retrieve.
Comment by MCPO Airdale on April 30, 2013 2:16 pm

I’m so glad nobody in the White House watches FNC. Otherwise, they might have briefed Mr. iWon on the State Dept. stonewalling on the Benghazi whistleblowers!
Comment by wiserbud on April 30, 2013 2:17 pm

I’ll take on an extra job to raise money to help pay for the moving costs, but how much will it take to make sure he stays there and shuts the fuck up?
Comment by wiserbud on April 30, 2013 2:18 pm

I may have a few ass-pennies stashed away that I could retrieve.

*closes eyes tightly
Comment by Cyn on April 30, 2013 2:19 pm

…Mr. iWon on the State Dept. stonewalling on the Benghazi whistleblowers!

I heard him spewing this crap on the radio this morning after dropping off the boys; I was screaming and flipping off my radio like a lunatic. Seemed then like other drivers were giving me a wide berth, which was nice.
Comment by Tushar on April 30, 2013 2:20 pm

>>but how much will it take to make sure he stays there and shuts the fuck up?

Wiser, I think Obama will keep on yapping and make life miserable for future Dem presidents. Carter has a tendency to flap his gums, and Clinton has a tendency to hog the limelight. This guy will leave them in the dust.
Comment by Tushar on April 30, 2013 2:21 pm

*closes eyes tightly

Hey wiser, come here and help me.
Comment by Pupster on April 30, 2013 2:22 pm
Comment by MCPO Airdale on April 30, 2013 2:23 pm

Whut?
Comment by MCPO Airdale on April 30, 2013 2:24 pm

So, I’m contemplating getting an online subscription. Can’t decide whether to go with the NYT or the WSJ. Both appear to be about the same price.
Comment by Cyn on April 30, 2013 2:26 pm

WSJ. Hands down.
Comment by Car in on April 30, 2013 2:27 pm

Chief, you’re fucking with us right?
Comment by Tushar on April 30, 2013 2:29 pm

NYT? Don’t make me come over and slap you upside that shiny noggin.
Comment by Sean M. on April 30, 2013 2:30 pm

Newsweek. For a buck, you don’t just get the subscription, you fucking own it.
Comment by agiledog on April 30, 2013 2:35 pm

Hustler.
Comment by Jimbro on April 30, 2013 2:40 pm

WSJ
Comment by Jimbro on April 30, 2013 2:42 pm

Hustler is online now? Time to sell my paper mill stocks
Comment by leoncaruthers on April 30, 2013 2:42 pm

Hustler.

Don’t give Flynt a frikkin’ dime. Steal that crap if you have to.
Comment by Cyn on April 30, 2013 2:45 pm

If only we knew of someone that could point out the very best pron sites…
Comment by xbradtc on April 30, 2013 2:46 pm

It’s a mystery, Cyn.
Comment by MCPO Airdale on April 30, 2013 2:50 pm

Christian Science Monitor it is!!
Comment by Jay in Ames on April 30, 2013 2:51 pm

If you like something, just type that term and rule 34 into your favorite search engine.
Comment by Jay in Ames on April 30, 2013 2:52 pm

oh wait…

NSFW
Comment by Michael on April 30, 2013 2:53 pm

MCPO, you dumbass punk, just read the magazine you already get from the AARP and you’ll know what you need to know.
Comment by Colorado Alex on April 30, 2013 3:04 pm

Wiser, I think Obama will keep on yapping and make life miserable for future Dem presidents. Carter has a tendency to flap his gums, and Clinton has a tendency to hog the limelight. This guy will leave them in the dust.

I wouldn’t be surprised if Obama ends up in Hollywood. He’ll make some guest appearances on TV shows and play the president in a couple of mediocre flicks.
Comment by daveintexas on April 30, 2013 3:06 pm

>> Combat Talon I retired

I heard that, though I never worked on that one, mine was the MC variant, Combat Talon II

…

I guess they really liked the name.
Comment by MCPO Airdale on April 30, 2013 3:06 pm

Guess Michael wants me to return his magazines!
Comment by xbradtc on April 30, 2013 3:21 pm

The only magazines I want to subscribe to are 30rds.
Comment by Pupster on April 30, 2013 3:30 pm

I wouldn’t be surprised if Obama ends up in Hollywood.

Nah, he’s going to the NBA.
Comment by agiledog on April 30, 2013 3:35 pm

You mean the WNBA?
Comment by leoncaruthers on April 30, 2013 3:35 pm

ESPN.
Comment by Hotspur on April 30, 2013 3:35 pm

LPGA
Comment by Hotspur on April 30, 2013 3:36 pm

Hahahahahaha
Comment by Tushar on April 30, 2013 3:53 pm

>>You mean the WNBA?

Well, considering that he is a honorary gay and a honorary woman, why not?
Comment by Mcpo Airdale on April 30, 2013 4:02 pm

So, what are we doing for supper tonight?
Comment by Colorado Alex on April 30, 2013 4:05 pm

So, what are we doing for supper tonight?

Cream of Sum Yung Gai?
Comment by Hotspur on April 30, 2013 4:06 pm

If I have any say in the matter it will be pizza.

But I probably won’t have any say in the matter.
Comment by Sean M. on April 30, 2013 4:07 pm

Just went out to run an errand. Ended up next to a guy in (I am not kidding here) a Prius with a TFG/Plugs sticker and a Coexist sticker on the back.
Comment by Hotspur on April 30, 2013 4:08 pm

Sean, I could go around the block and count ten of those.
Comment by Mcpo Airdale on April 30, 2013 4:13 pm

Ann Arbor is the epicenter of ignorant, meaningless, leftist gestures. But, there are some good restaurants.
Comment by agiledog on April 30, 2013 4:13 pm

I see a dozen of those on the daily commute, Sean.

That is why they won’t let me mount .50 cals on my running boards.
Comment by Sean M. on April 30, 2013 4:19 pm

We are thankfully close enough to Orange County that things like that are actually few and far between.
Comment by Hotspur on April 30, 2013 4:25 pm

Speaking of meaningless leftist gestures, all of my friends keep posting these United Against Rape posters on FaceRape. What the fuck is the point? Who isn’t against rape?
Comment by xbradtc on April 30, 2013 4:26 pm

Who isn’t against rape?

The NBA?

Brett Rothlesberger?
Comment by leoncaruthers on April 30, 2013 4:27 pm

Ann Arbor is the epicenter of ignorant, meaningless, leftist gestures.

There’s a reason I left. I do miss the grocery store, though. Belleville’s offerings in that area are mediocre at best.
Comment by xbradtc on April 30, 2013 4:27 pm

Ben Rothlesberger.

shit.
Comment by Hotspur on April 30, 2013 4:31 pm

Well, obviously the guys who rape are not against rape, but are these posters supposed to persuade them not to rape?
Comment by Car in on April 30, 2013 4:31 pm

posting these United Against Rape posters on FaceRape. What the fuck is the point? Who isn’t against rape?

The point is that they are fucking stupid.
Comment by leoncaruthers on April 30, 2013 4:32 pm

I’m pretty sure no would-be rapist is going to be even mildly dissuaded by a facerape poat.
Comment by Hotspur on April 30, 2013 4:33 pm

OMG! There’s a whole bunch of people on Facebook united against rape.

I better not rape.
Comment by Hotspur on April 30, 2013 4:34 pm

What about rape-rape?
Comment by xbradtc on April 30, 2013 4:35 pm

Well, that’s my first ever link from Hot Air.
Comment by leoncaruthers on April 30, 2013 4:36 pm

Whoa, hey, not rape-rape. That’s srs not okay. Regular rape is sort of iffy, so it requires poats against it, like smoking.
Comment by scott on April 30, 2013 4:42 pm

I support gravity.
Comment by Hotspur on April 30, 2013 4:44 pm

United Against Welfare Fraud
Comment by Hotspur on April 30, 2013 4:45 pm

Oh, wait, it’s Unite Against Rape.

So it’s really a call to action.

Well, that changes everything.
Comment by Hotspur on April 30, 2013 4:46 pm

Unite Against Graffiti
Comment by roamingfirehydrant on April 30, 2013 4:47 pm

How many years ago did Billie Jean King come out? Why are they making this guy out to be like Jackie Robinson?
Comment by Mcpo Airdale on April 30, 2013 4:48 pm

United against public pooping.
Comment by Hotspur on April 30, 2013 4:48 pm

Unite Against Indifference
Comment by leoncaruthers on April 30, 2013 4:50 pm

I support gravity.

While I fight gravity on a regular basis, I’m not sure I ever really want to win.
Comment by Michael on April 30, 2013 4:51 pm

Ben Rothlesberger.

shit.

Try again. Roethlisberger.

Led Miami Ohio to fame when Daughter Michael was there.
Comment by leoncaruthers on April 30, 2013 4:57 pm

Unite Against Indifference

Stop oppressing my culture!
Comment by Mcpo Airdale on April 30, 2013 4:58 pm

I’m so essited to see my DG tomorrow!!
Comment by Hotspur on April 30, 2013 4:59 pm

Give her a big smooch from all of her H2 uncles and aunties.
Comment by Colorado Alex on April 30, 2013 5:01 pm

How many years ago did Billie Jean King come out? Why are they making this guy out to be like Jackie Robinson?

Because some people still aren’t sufficiently pro-gay. Homophobia=racism and indifference=opposition. Therefore, indifference=opposition=homophobia=racism.
Comment by Mcpo Airdale on April 30, 2013 5:07 pm

CAlex – Excellent observation. BTW – Do you have any bacon on you?
Comment by roamingfirehydrant on April 30, 2013 5:07 pm

Spoil her rotten, MCPO!
Comment by scott on April 30, 2013 5:09 pm

When gays come out in the NFL will there still be tight ends and wide receivers?
Comment by Colorado Alex on April 30, 2013 5:09 pm

MCPO,

No, I just always smell like that.
Comment by scott on April 30, 2013 5:10 pm

The NFL will probably have to rename some stuff.
Comment by Hotspur on April 30, 2013 5:15 pm

Can they still say “run it up the middle”?
Comment by xbradtc on April 30, 2013 5:15 pm

The NFL will probably have to rename some stuff.

You mean the final game of the season will now be The Fabulous Bowl?
Comment by Colorado Alex on April 30, 2013 5:16 pm

The NFL will probably have to rename some stuff.

I hope not. Watching a bunch of washed up athletes sitting in the ESPN booth talking about how openly gay John Doe is, “One of the best young tight ends to come into the NFL in a long time” is priceless.
Comment by Hotspur on April 30, 2013 5:17 pm

Quarterback sack!
Comment by agiledog on April 30, 2013 5:18 pm

Deep penetration into the opponent’s end!
Comment by Pupster on April 30, 2013 5:19 pm

Spike the ball.
Comment by daveintexas on April 30, 2013 5:23 pm

personal foul
Comment by Jay in Ames on April 30, 2013 5:25 pm

If the Koch Brothers buy the LA Times, will you subscribe? Chicago Tribune?
Comment by Hotspur on April 30, 2013 5:28 pm

pile driver
Comment by scott on April 30, 2013 5:30 pm

Quarterback sack in the end zone.
Comment by xbradtc on April 30, 2013 5:31 pm

Illegal use of the hands.
Comment by agiledog on April 30, 2013 5:32 pm

Illegal forward pass
Comment by xbradtc on April 30, 2013 5:33 pm

Ineligible receiver.
Comment by Hotspur on April 30, 2013 5:33 pm

Offensive holding!
Comment by xbradtc on April 30, 2013 5:33 pm

Ineligible receiver.

AKA H8R
Comment by xbradtc on April 30, 2013 5:34 pm

Illegal glans to the face.
Comment by agiledog on April 30, 2013 5:34 pm

Good thing they’re doing away with the Tuck Rule!
Comment by agiledog on April 30, 2013 5:35 pm

Looks like this has become a sausage fest. I’m outta here for now.
Comment by Hotspur on April 30, 2013 5:35 pm

pitch out
Comment by Hotspur on April 30, 2013 5:36 pm

Inches to go.
Comment by xbradtc on April 30, 2013 5:37 pm

A game of inches.
Comment by roamingfirehydrant on April 30, 2013 5:37 pm

Work question: Do you:
A. Acknowledge every email with a response and expect the same in return, even if it’s something trivial?
Theta. Acknowledge the important emails (like a final report) or when you know the sender will pester you with “did you get my email” if you don’t. Expect nothing in return.
3. Acknowledge only when pestered.

I got one that must send 1,000 emails a day in oneupsmanship.
Comment by Hotspur on April 30, 2013 5:41 pm

I ignore people who engage in one-upmanship. Might as well give them the last word early.
Comment by Hotspur on April 30, 2013 5:42 pm

Second and long.
Comment by MJ on April 30, 2013 5:49 pm

Dammit. I know nothing about football.

How about that one guy that throws the ball? He reaches for a fat guys cock all of the time, then grabs the ball instead. He’s gay.
Comment by xbradtc on April 30, 2013 5:50 pm

Wow. HOLY SHIT. Do not get bit by a snake.

Graphic pic of Bear Grylls producer’s foot. Much of the necrotic tissue has been cut away. Don’t click if you aren’t ready for some graphic stuff.

our man vs wild producer suffering from a brutal snake bite – fighting the injury with courage. pic.twitter.com/G6gJFnW38q

— Bear Grylls (@BearGrylls) April 30, 2013
Comment by mundane68 on April 30, 2013 5:53 pm

Cottonmouth bite, if it was here in the US. Trying to remember what other venous snakes use necrotizing toxins…Cobra? (I think they are neurotoxins)
Comment by Hotspur on April 30, 2013 5:53 pm

Green Bay Packers
Comment by Hotspur on April 30, 2013 5:54 pm

Oilers
Comment by mundane68 on April 30, 2013 5:55 pm

((facepalm)) Diamondback Rattlesnakes
Comment by roamingfirehydrant on April 30, 2013 5:57 pm

sooooo not clicking

There’s a good reason I never thought seriously about a medical career.
Comment by Jewstin on April 30, 2013 6:00 pm

Afternoon.
Comment by xbradtc on April 30, 2013 6:05 pm

WHAT DID YOU BUILD?!
Comment by Jewstin on April 30, 2013 6:06 pm

Today I built one (1) of these:

http://tinyurl.com/c2ff766

and three (3) of these

http://tinyurl.com/ckyceu6

Then I serviced and cleaned a warranty return that was encrusted with rancid grease.
Comment by Car in on April 30, 2013 6:09 pm

I didn’t know Daughter Michael went to Miami of Ohio.

Mr car in and I are a Miami Merger.
Comment by Car in on April 30, 2013 6:09 pm

And 7 miles, bitches.

In my skort.
Comment by leoncaruthers on April 30, 2013 6:12 pm

A garter snake bite can go bad just because of the bacteria.
Comment by daveintexas on April 30, 2013 6:12 pm

Holy shit that foot looks awful.
Comment by xbradtc on April 30, 2013 6:22 pm

He’s lucky he’s got Obamacare, or they just would have amputated for fun and profit.
Comment by mundane68 on April 30, 2013 6:35 pm

Yeah a garter snake bite could go bad, but it wouldn’t in this day and age. Plus, that Bear isn’t the one that does all that hiking barefoot. So I imagine his crew wears shoes too, y’know, unless he got bitten in the kitchen…or something
Comment by LC Aggie Sith on April 30, 2013 6:41 pm

Wow, thanks, Brad. Had to save that pic for Hubby. And no, I ain’t showing it to the girls.

Today…
Comment by Tushar on April 30, 2013 6:41 pm

It is my observation that, statistically speaking, rapists generally give up their rapeyness when they acquire fresh bullet wounds. Unfortunately people who are United against rape are also opposed to guns.
Comment by daveintexas on April 30, 2013 6:43 pm

Shooting a would-be rapist is an excellent way of gettin all that rapeyness out of their system.
Comment by MJ on April 30, 2013 6:45 pm

And 7 miles, bitches.
In my skort.
————————
Why no 8 miles?
Comment by mundane68 on April 30, 2013 6:54 pm

But, didn’t some…person…at Slate say that all men are rapey rapists or something? So is that saying, then, “United Against Men”?
Comment by MJ on April 30, 2013 6:54 pm

You guys are such dick. If the rapist is a Government Approved Victim™ then they are entitled to a little poon.
Comment by leoncaruthers on April 30, 2013 7:00 pm

Every man us a potential rapist just like every woman is a potential false-rape-accuser.

Men use their dicks, women use the courts, but it’s rape either way.
Comment by leoncaruthers on April 30, 2013 7:10 pm

And that is how you kill a thread.
Comment by George Orwell on April 30, 2013 7:15 pm

You didn’t kill the thread, you only raped it.
Comment by leoncaruthers on April 30, 2013 7:22 pm

True. But it probably wishes it were dead.
Comment by George Orwell on April 30, 2013 7:24 pm

The thread was asking for it.
Comment by Michael on April 30, 2013 7:27 pm

I didn’t know Daughter Michael went to Miami of Ohio.

Mr car in and I are a Miami Merger.

Carin, deep down inside, I’ve always had this feeling that there must be something good about you, and I was right.

And 7 miles, bitches.

In my skort.

But not much.
Comment by Michael on April 30, 2013 7:32 pm

Seriously, Carin, LOOK AT ME!

*does two-finger point at eyes*

There are clothing options other than skorts, mom jeans and khaki dockers.

Glance through one of those catalogs you throw away.
Comment by Michael on April 30, 2013 7:39 pm

I remember reading about blood tests of women claiming they had been raped by means of a roofie, back when the roofie scare was in vogue. I mean, these were women who were willing to go to the police and allege rape on the basis of being doped.

The results were about 3% positive for rohypnol. The other 97% tested for nothing, alcohol or cocaine.
Comment by leoncaruthers on April 30, 2013 7:42 pm

I remember when GHB rape was the huge scare… right after the sorostitutes had been using it as a recreational drug because you could get drunk on fewer calories.
Comment by Michael on April 30, 2013 7:50 pm

As a prosecutor’s intern, I had the experience of interviewing a woman who claimed rape. She had picked up a hitchhiker (nice looking guy compared to her), invited him to spend the night at her home and they retired to the same bed (this was her story), she had been drinking by her own admission, then claimed he raped her in a house full of people who heard no protest, and that he spent the rest of the night sleeping and left peacably in the morning with nobody knowing anything was amiss, until she decided to allege rape to the prosecutor.

I had a deputy pick him up; he was still hitchhiking out of town. He was scared shitless, but he confirmed the entire story except to say the sex was consensual.

I called her back in and told her we did not have a case to take to a jury. She said OK.
Comment by Michael on April 30, 2013 7:55 pm

My point being, let’s have another Facebook page: People United Against Sluts Who Don’t Want To Feel Like Sluts The Next Morning.

It’s a very real problem.
Comment by MJ on April 30, 2013 7:57 pm

Nothing quite like a buncha dudes talkin bout rapeyness to bring out the ladies.
Comment by wiserbud on April 30, 2013 7:57 pm

>>>People United Against Sluts Who Don’t Want To Feel Like Sluts The Next Morning.

Too long. People Against Mare rolls off the tongue much easier.
Comment by Hotspur on April 30, 2013 8:05 pm

Show us how to do it then, MJ.
Comment by Hotspur on April 30, 2013 8:10 pm

Gheyest drink of all time:

Banana Hammock On The Beach
Comment by Michael on April 30, 2013 8:11 pm

Any single guy I have talked to is appalled by rape and wants it to be vigorously prosecuted and punished.

They also recognize that rape hype is basically a power issue that puts them at risk.
Comment by scott on April 30, 2013 8:13 pm

I think Car in scared them away when she was talking about all the miles in her skort.
Comment by Hotspur on April 30, 2013 8:14 pm

I think Michael is referring to transactional sex before the price was agreed upon.
Comment by scott on April 30, 2013 8:25 pm

How do you earn skort miles?
Comment by Tushar on April 30, 2013 8:26 pm

Feminists say all sex is rape (just like all commerce is theft).
Does that include lesbian sex?
Comment by Michael on April 30, 2013 8:27 pm

Hotspur, the real issue regarding transactional sex is whether state and local sales taxes are being collected, or are exempt because an out-of-state server was involved to close the deal.
Comment by Sean M. on April 30, 2013 8:29 pm

Did anybody drop some subtle hints that anybody else was kind of overdoing it with the cologne today?
Comment by Pupster on April 30, 2013 8:29 pm

Cycling is pretty gay, too.

https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/7403493888/hE7DBA7D5/
Comment by George Orwell on April 30, 2013 8:30 pm

Feminists say all sex is rape (just like all commerce is theft).
Does that include lesbian sex?

Interesting query. This may require extensive research online.

*switches browser to privacy mode*
Comment by leoncaruthers on April 30, 2013 8:31 pm

If I pay a camgirl to let me watch her eat a banana, and she’s in Norway, do I owe sales tax if she later claims it was rape?
Comment by George Orwell on April 30, 2013 8:32 pm

Comment by Michael on April 30, 2013 8:27 pm
Hotspur, the real issue regarding transactional sex is whether state and local sales taxes are being collected, or are exempt because an out-of-state server was involved to close the deal.

If we raise the possibility of paid sex over the Internet, we could have a really lively discussion of sales taxes.
Comment by Pupster on April 30, 2013 8:32 pm

Holy shit.

https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/7404837120/h586C5023/
Comment by George Orwell on April 30, 2013 8:34 pm

If I pay a camgirl to let me watch her eat a banana, and she’s in Norway

A filthy Scandi? Shame on you.
Comment by Pupster on April 30, 2013 8:35 pm

L to R

Jewstin, Dateguy
Comment by Mcpo Airdale on April 30, 2013 8:36 pm

D.G. says fresh raspberries are wunnerful!

http://flic.kr/p/efzDPw
Comment by leoncaruthers on April 30, 2013 8:40 pm

A filthy Scandi? Shame on you.

I was slumming. The Czech girl wanted more euros and wouldn’t do the pigtail braids. A scandi girl has no shame about braids.
Comment by Tushar on April 30, 2013 8:42 pm

>>If I pay a camgirl to let me watch her eat a banana, and she’s in Norway

Many tax jurisdictions assess no sales tax on foodstuff. So that has to be considered too.
Comment by Michael on April 30, 2013 8:47 pm

Or, you could claim the camgirl was exempt as some sort of medical therapy. Have you talked to a doctor about this?
Comment by Tushar on April 30, 2013 8:47 pm

Chief, has DG’s hair started to lie flat a bit?
Comment by scott on April 30, 2013 8:50 pm

Houston, the hair has landed.
Comment by MCPO Airdale on April 30, 2013 8:52 pm

Tushar – Her Momma is “training it” to fall over.
Comment by leoncaruthers on April 30, 2013 8:56 pm

Have you talked to a doctor about this?

I have an appointment on May 7.
Comment by daveintexas on April 30, 2013 9:00 pm

we used baby oil on crazy baby girl hair.
Comment by MJ on April 30, 2013 9:00 pm

H2 bitches! Assemble!
Comment by daveintexas on April 30, 2013 9:01 pm

yeah, that’s not the baby fuzz anymore
Comment by Car in on April 30, 2013 9:05 pm

Im not gonna run in mom jeans.

I only did 7 miles because that’s how long today’s route was. I have to be in the mood to run certain routes. Plus, first two miles had a serious headwind, and miles 5 and 6 had killer hills.
Comment by Tushar on April 30, 2013 9:07 pm

Carin, you can run all you want, you cannot run away from yourself.
Comment by xbradtc on April 30, 2013 9:09 pm

Totally Tushy Tuesday didn’t go over well here. But if you like that sort of thing…

http://thecaptives.wordpress.com/2013/05/01/totally-tushy-tuesday/
Comment by Car in on April 30, 2013 9:10 pm

Tushar,I run to be with myself more intimately.

Whore mouths, shut them.

I was in a horrible mood, and couldn’t face the gym. But 7 miles on the road is an attitude adjustment.
Comment by xbradtc on April 30, 2013 9:19 pm

Damn. Guess we all shut our whore mouths.
Comment by Vmaximus on April 30, 2013 9:22 pm

I bought a 6 pack of Shiner Bock a few weeks ago.
I have not taken a shine to it yet.
I usually like Bocks and double bock
Comment by daveintexas on April 30, 2013 9:23 pm

Shiner Bock gives me a headache.

YMMV
Comment by scott on April 30, 2013 9:26 pm

Bock sucker.
Comment by Sean M. on April 30, 2013 9:28 pm

I’m in the bucket over on TTT, b-rad.
Comment by Zekexas on April 30, 2013 9:29 pm

What is TTT? Is that like H15?
Comment by xbradtc on April 30, 2013 9:31 pm

Sean, are you the secret agent, or the viagra ad?
Comment by leoncaruthers on April 30, 2013 9:31 pm

Why is it already May at your porn site, XBrad?
Comment by Michael on April 30, 2013 9:34 pm

I have to be in the mood to run certain routes.

Oh yeah, you gotta be “in the mood.”

Sheesh.
Comment by scott on April 30, 2013 9:34 pm

I reserved a spot at the taxpayer funded range for Sunday.

Screw you taxpayers!
Comment by scott on April 30, 2013 9:35 pm

Killer hills and Michigan.

Comedy gold!
Comment by leoncaruthers on April 30, 2013 9:36 pm

We have hills, we’re not Iowa.
Comment by scott on April 30, 2013 9:37 pm

MJ commented about hills in Florida.

Runners are funny.
Comment by Sean M. on April 30, 2013 9:40 pm

Sean, are you the secret agent, or the viagra ad?

I’m the Nigerian fellow.
Comment by MCPO Airdale on April 30, 2013 9:41 pm

Florida is flatter than Kiera Knightly’s chest.
Comment by wiserbud on April 30, 2013 9:41 pm

>>>an attitude adjustment.

With all those “killer hills”, wouldn’t that be an altitude adjustment?
Comment by Michael on April 30, 2013 9:42 pm

H2 Family Theater:

Michael: Hey honey, I’m not in the mood to fly to fucking Warsaw in the middle of the fucking winter to work on a fucking hopeless deal. Why don’t you go out and make some money instead?

. . .

Fin.
Comment by roamingfirehydrant on April 30, 2013 9:52 pm
Comment by Michael on April 30, 2013 9:52 pm

Vacation tip:

Cross Warsaw in January off your list.

Actually, at any time of year, skip Warsaw and go to Cracow.
Comment by scott on April 30, 2013 9:55 pm

* check topographical maps *
* determines that killer hill equals a couple flights of stairs *

We call that flat here
Comment by daveintexas on April 30, 2013 9:58 pm

I mean, I like Shiner Bock.

But 3 and I’m at headache. And I don’t get headaches.

The only other beer that gives me a (near) instant headache is Keystone.
Comment by wiserbud on April 30, 2013 9:59 pm

What the hell????
Comment by Michael on April 30, 2013 10:01 pm

In all fairness, Warsaw has done a good job of reconstructing its “old town” district, so that it is a pleasant venue.

Problem is, it’s not actually old. It’s like a Disney reconstruction, based of photographs of what it looked like before WWII.
Comment by mundane68 on April 30, 2013 10:01 pm

How evil am I that I am taking some delight in the financial difficulties of an religious institution that asked me to not bring my son because they didn’t have a place for him…
Comment by mundane68 on April 30, 2013 10:03 pm

Is that like Scott Evil?
Comment by Sean M. on April 30, 2013 10:05 pm

If only they had strict gun control laws…

http://wgntv.com/2013/04/30/9-people-shot-across-chicago/
Comment by roamingfirehydrant on April 30, 2013 10:06 pm

Mundane, karma is a bitch.
Comment by Tushar on April 30, 2013 10:07 pm

http://imgur.com/gallery/WTH5bmE
Comment by Sean M. on April 30, 2013 10:07 pm

What the hell????

http://youtu.be/EL5dQPgx3-M

Um…
Comment by leoncaruthers on April 30, 2013 10:13 pm

Michael, Bath, England did the same thing, but it’s pretty convincing. The original quarry owner donated stone from the same source to rebuild what the Luftwaffen had destroyed. Unless it was pointed out to me, I couldn’t tell which buildings had been bombed and rebuilt.
Comment by mundane68 on April 30, 2013 10:14 pm

I know Roamy…I just feel kind of bad.

Part of the problem is that this church was, at one time, alive and vibrant. I had been going since I was 6. Then egos got inflated. They wanted to build a high school, expand the sanctuary (which was really old!), and then make a movie about a really abused people of Tushar’s tribe.

But, my son and I, no room at the inn…besides, autistic kids look normal. When you make pamphlets and such about ministries to disabled, it is all about wheelchairs and happy Down Syndrome kids. Not kids who hum and rock back and forth in the back of the room, or who can’t talk.
Comment by MCPO Airdale on April 30, 2013 10:15 pm

Who is the faggot with the unicorn?
Comment by mundane68 on April 30, 2013 10:18 pm

What the hell????

http://youtu.be/EL5dQPgx3-M

Female Version
Comment by roamingfirehydrant on April 30, 2013 10:19 pm

I know how you feel, Mundane. I spent 22 years at one church and finally got fed up with the abuse of volunteers. I’m still on their FB list, and I take the same evil glee when they beg for volunteers. My new church is happy to have me, and the people there say thank you instead of bitching.
Comment by scott on April 30, 2013 10:22 pm

Mow the lawn!
Comment by Car in on April 30, 2013 10:28 pm

Much of michigan is flat, but we have some glacial morans. It may seem like nothing but a few runs with some of the hills around here …. you ‘ll feel it . I was actually pretty well prepared for the miles long ramp of the bridge for the free press half. A ton of people end up walking that .
Comment by Cyn on April 30, 2013 10:33 pm

Somebody here needs a good debriefing, and I haven’t quite figured out just who yet.
Comment by wiserbud on April 30, 2013 10:34 pm

>>>Female Version

It wasn’t the shaving of the nether regions that got me. It was the “I’d fuck me” comment at the end.

A different version of that ad just aired on TBS, ending with the same “I’d fuck me.” ending.

Between the GE ad I linked the other day and this theme with Norelco, have ad agencies decided that “fucking creepy” is the new “babies and puppies”?
Comment by wiserbud on April 30, 2013 10:35 pm

>>>Somebody here needs a good debriefing, and I haven’t quite figured out just who yet.

Assuming anyone here is wearing any to begin with….
Comment by Cyn on April 30, 2013 10:37 pm

Assuming anyone here is wearing any to begin with….

Aaah, yes; we are a pants and skorts optional blog after 9 pm.
Comment by mundane68 on April 30, 2013 10:37 pm

Somebody here needs a good debriefing, and I haven’t quite figured out just who yet.

I think that means something dirty/fun…but I forget what
Comment by daveintexas on April 30, 2013 10:38 pm

well I wouldn’t fuck him.

hairy gross hipster dork
Comment by Cyn on April 30, 2013 10:39 pm

I think that means something dirty/fun…but I forget what

*clinks glass with Mundo*
Comment by wiserbud on April 30, 2013 10:40 pm

>>>Aaah, yes; we are a pants and skorts optional blog after 9 pm.

Skorts: optional

Got it.
Comment by Zekexas on April 30, 2013 10:41 pm

I ironed my shirt for tomorrow
That shirt is so crisp I think I cut myself on it.

40 years and I finally did one right
Comment by Cyn on April 30, 2013 10:41 pm

Skorts: ~~optional~~ mandatory for wiserbud.
Comment by wiserbud on April 30, 2013 10:42 pm

>>>well I wouldn’t fuck him.

I will sleep much better tonight with that knowledge.
Comment by Cyn on April 30, 2013 10:43 pm

Ermagerd, I hatey hate ironing.

I’m surprised your office isn’t a polo-type office, Vman. Do you wear ties too?
Comment by wiserbud on April 30, 2013 10:43 pm

Glow-in-dark-fish BBT episode is on.

classic
Comment by wiserbud on April 30, 2013 10:44 pm

>>>Skorts: mandatory for wiserbud.

Always have been, always will be
Comment by Zekexas on April 30, 2013 10:44 pm

MJ bikes across the Skyway. That is a big Florida hill.
Comment by Zekexas on April 30, 2013 10:46 pm

Occasionally Cyn. If a client meeting is scheduled..well any public meeting.

Us drones can were polo shirts.
If they have the company logo on them or it is Friday.
Comment by Cyn on April 30, 2013 10:47 pm

Always have been, always will be

It’s the little things that keep us thankful.
Comment by wiserbud on April 30, 2013 10:47 pm

>>>hairy gross hipster dork

Norelco may help with the “hairy” part, but I fear the “gross hipster dork” part will require the efforts of thousands of scientists working for centuries to cure.

On our dime, of course…
Comment by Cyn on April 30, 2013 10:48 pm

I still love the look of ties, a lot, but in the summer time, they are just cruel.
Comment by daveintexas on April 30, 2013 10:50 pm

>> I will sleep much better tonight with that knowledge.

Aww. I miss you too.
Comment by roamingfirehydrant on April 30, 2013 10:50 pm

Michael and his brother

http://www.gocomics.com/looseparts/2013/04/30
Comment by George Orwell on April 30, 2013 10:53 pm

Hi. Anyone ship their pants today?
Comment by Zekexas on April 30, 2013 10:54 pm

It feels good to dress up. I bought some famous name brand shirts on sale for $30 they arrived with $120 price tags on them.

They are better cut and fabric than $15 Wal-Mart shirts. I would say they are worth $30.
Comment by Cyn on April 30, 2013 10:56 pm

Shipped mine… twice!
Comment by Cyn on April 30, 2013 11:00 pm

Nice score, Vman. Clothes from Walmart are good for a season and then they become lawn mowing attire. Shoes too.
Comment by George Orwell on April 30, 2013 11:00 pm

Nothing feels better than shipping anywhere you please.
Comment by xbradtc on April 30, 2013 11:00 pm

Money spent on Brooks Brothers dress shirts is money well spent.
Comment by mundane68 on April 30, 2013 11:10 pm

Guys shoes last forever. i still have my Allan Edmonds dress shoes from my Army days. THough they have been resoled once
Comment by lauraw on April 30, 2013 11:12 pm

I’m curious how Vmax managed to ship his shirts, but I guess I don’t really need to know.
Comment by George Orwell on April 30, 2013 11:13 pm

Once I shipped my socks.
Comment by wiserbud on April 30, 2013 11:13 pm

To add just a small addendum to my post from last night…

There is nothing cooler than having a multi-billion dollar company available at my beck and call to create unique parts based on my specific designs.

That piece (well, actually there’s two of them) will allow me to re-attach the wheel to my lawn mower, keeping me from having to buy a new one.

Built on the same type of machine that built the WTC1 spire.
Comment by daveintexas on April 30, 2013 11:14 pm

paulfrederick.com

My shirtmaker for 15 years. Custom shop. I recommend the herringbone fabrics.
Comment by George Orwell on April 30, 2013 11:18 pm

There is nothing cooler than having a multi-billion dollar company available at my beck and call to create unique parts based on my specific designs

I was hoping for a fembot, not a bracket.
Comment by wiserbud on April 30, 2013 11:20 pm

Was also able to get them to fabricate a part to seal off the fuel pump mount after my FIL forced a piece into it, forcing us to convert the Samurai to having an power fuel pump.

They actually personalized that piece. I was a little disappointed they didn’t personalize the mower repair part, but, as wiserbride said, “hey, it’s just a lawn mower.”

But still….
Comment by wiserbud on April 30, 2013 11:21 pm

>>>I was hoping for a fembot, not a bracket.

Send me your design and I’ll see what I can do.
Comment by lauraw on April 30, 2013 11:21 pm

crunch crunch crunch- look out the window

A coyote hunting around the pond (frogs).

And I have to take my dog out for his last evening pip soon.

God, I hate coyotes so much.
Comment by wiserbud on April 30, 2013 11:23 pm

>>>My shirtmaker for 15 years.

I guess now is a bad time to call you a 1%er…
Comment by xbradtc on April 30, 2013 11:23 pm

Wiser blew a seal?
Comment by wiserbud on April 30, 2013 11:24 pm

>>>God, I hate coyotes so much

….says the gun owner?
Comment by daveintexas on April 30, 2013 11:25 pm

I think I’m more of a 12%er, but I’m persnickety about shirts.

Punching above my weight. Which is lower.

Nite kids.
Comment by wiserbud on April 30, 2013 11:25 pm

>>>Wiser blew a seal?

Nah, it’s ice cream
Comment by George Orwell on April 30, 2013 11:26 pm

Comment by wiserbud on April 30, 2013 11:21 pm
>>>I was hoping for a fembot, not a bracket.
—
Send me your design and I’ll see what I can do.

http://is.gd/KMD2eY

Not to scale.
Comment by George Orwell on April 30, 2013 11:28 pm

Um, let’s try that again. Can you manufacture this?
Comment by wiserbud on April 30, 2013 11:29 pm

>>>Not to scale.

Try that link again…
Comment by wiserbud on April 30, 2013 11:31 pm

>>>Can you manufacture this?

Maybe… Maybe not… But damn, I would so enjoy taking the measurements…
Comment by Cyn on April 30, 2013 11:31 pm

Can you manufacture this?
http://i.imgur.com/bqclTQh.jpg

Heck, even I’d take one of those.
Comment by lauraw on April 30, 2013 11:32 pm

Yeah…Scott shoots at stuff during the day, when there are other noises all over the neighborhood, including the guy a few doors down with the actual range in his backyard. That’s damn convenient.

11:30 pm, silent night, shooting at a coyote is going to make wakeys and bring some trouble.
Comment by wiserbud on April 30, 2013 11:32 pm

>>>Heck, even I’d take one of those.

*thud
Comment by George Orwell on April 30, 2013 11:33 pm

I suspect the lead time on that design is about 25 years give or take a few.
Comment by Cyn on April 30, 2013 11:34 pm

HA! Looks like they had to do a little airbrushing to make that photo, um, SFW.
Comment by wiserbud on April 30, 2013 11:35 pm

>>>I suspect the lead time on that design is about 25 years give or take a few.

I am all about detail
Comment by Cyn on April 30, 2013 11:36 pm

*kills the poat when all men over the age of 12 go to zoom in on Upton’s hooters for the next 30 minutes*
Comment by George Orwell on April 30, 2013 11:36 pm

I hear the raw CAD file is not for sale to minors.
Comment by wiserbud on April 30, 2013 11:37 pm

>>>11:30 pm, silent night, shooting at a coyote is going to make wakeys and bring some trouble.

I thought he had that all figured out.

Low caliber, low velocity…. Noiseless
Comment by wiserbud on April 30, 2013 11:38 pm

>>>I hear the raw CAD file is not for sale to minors.

Ummmm….. Pirate Bay?
Comment by George Orwell on April 30, 2013 11:41 pm

Once they tried running this design through a 3D printer but the device rejected the file as corrupt:
Comment by Cyn on April 30, 2013 11:41 pm

Ha ha – you two are obviously not yet even 12.

Or you’ve downloaded the photo to study later.
Comment by wiserbud on April 30, 2013 11:42 pm

>>>Upton’s hooters

Yeah… That’s what I zoomed in on.

And yes… tons of p-shop on that photo

Like I care
Comment by Cyn on April 30, 2013 11:43 pm

http://i.imgur.com/mHUCXdK.jpg

*smacks George with the ban hammer with prejudice*
Comment by wiserbud on April 30, 2013 11:43 pm

>>>>Once they tried running this design through a 3D printer but the device rejected the file as corrupt:

Looks more like a virus…

Definitely malware
Comment by Cyn on April 30, 2013 11:44 pm

Like I care

Becoming more discriminating; I can see that. She’s just about your daughter’s age, right?
Comment by wiserbud on April 30, 2013 11:45 pm

>>>She’s just about your daughter’s age, right?

I hate you
Comment by George Orwell on April 30, 2013 11:46 pm

*smacks George with the ban hammer with prejudice*

Ooof… Do that again, but first put on spiked heels and hold a riding crop.
Comment by Cyn on April 30, 2013 11:47 pm

I hate you

M’WAH!
Comment by Cyn on April 30, 2013 11:48 pm

Sheesh, George, how much spikier can 4-inches get?! *grabs crop*
Comment by xbradtc on April 30, 2013 11:52 pm

Ooof… Do that again, but first put on spiked heels and hold a riding crop.

I’ve got those pics scheduled for next Tuesday.
Comment by Cyn on April 30, 2013 11:53 pm

Okay, cool kids, morning came early for me today so I’m off like a prom dress. Sweet dreams of rainbows and cotton candy and a Kate Upton who’s still well maintained and at least five years older than your kids.
Comment by George Orwell on April 30, 2013 11:53 pm

Leon tried to manufacture this with a CAD/CAM service.
Comment by wiserbud on April 30, 2013 11:55 pm

>>>Leon tried to manufacture this with a CAD/CAM service.

No fair using the same link twice, GO
Comment by George Orwell on April 30, 2013 11:57 pm

No fair using the same link twice, GO

Come on dude, Carrot Top is way more hawt than Kathy Griffin.
Comment by wiserbud on May 1, 2013 12:03 am

>>>Carrot Top is way more hawt than Kathy Griffin

That’s kind of like saying thin Madeline Albright is hotter than fat Madeline Albright
Comment by George Orwell on May 1, 2013 12:06 am

That’s kind of like saying thin Madeline Albright is hotter than that Madeline Albright

You takes what you can gets in the Obama Depression.
Comment by osoloco11 on May 1, 2013 12:10 am

Grrrr…all the illegals do EBT returns at the end of the month when their cards won’t load. Not surprised how much $ the Boston Bombers got in public aid.
Comment by wiserbud on May 1, 2013 12:15 am

Illegals… Return… What a concept
Comment by Jay in Ames on May 1, 2013 12:17 am

There are hills in Iowa!

Really, quit laughing.
Comment by wiserbud on May 1, 2013 12:19 am

By the way, half my comments tonight have been created through voice recognition on my iPhone.

so much easier than typing
Comment by osoloco11 on May 1, 2013 12:21 am

I’m a big fan of self-deporting. We can’t afford the Gang of Ocho.
Comment by wiserbud on May 1, 2013 12:24 am

Goob trite
Comment by osoloco11 on May 1, 2013 12:45 am

It is April. I won’t be slashing my wrists over baseball until AFTER the All Star Break.
Comment by xbradtc on May 1, 2013 1:15 am

I won’t be slashing my wrists until after an MLB player comes out.

BTW, am I the only one surprised the “first” wasn’t an NFL kicker?
Comment by osoloco11 on May 1, 2013 1:16 am

Selling the POS Honda tomorrow. It’ll be weird having only one car.
Comment by osoloco11 on May 1, 2013 1:19 am

I really don’t care who does what to whom. Play ball!
Comment by Michael on May 1, 2013 1:28 am

MJ bikes across the Skyway. That is a big Florida hill.

The fire ants in Texas make hills that big.
Comment by osoloco11 on May 1, 2013 1:36 am

I live on a mesa. The valley is a mile high here. I have friends in FL that live 4ft above sea level. Best thing about sea level is being able to drink without getting intoxicated.
Comment by osoloco11 on May 1, 2013 1:54 am

G’night guys. I’m re-reading all the books I own. 12 in 2 days. I’m on a roll. Trashy romance novels, so nothing serious or ponderous.
Comment by Sean M. on May 1, 2013 2:14 am

I lost my derp
Under the bridge
To that little girl
So much to me
Comment by xbradtc on May 1, 2013 2:58 am

The Very First Web Page.
http://info.cern.ch/hypertext/WWW/TheProject.html

Story here.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-22249490
Comment by Sean M. on May 1, 2013 3:07 am

What, no MIDI playing in the background?
Comment by xbradtc on May 1, 2013 3:21 am

Really, I was surprised it wasn’t either a cat or porn.
Comment by Pupster on May 1, 2013 6:46 am

Its leg day!
Comment by Pupster on May 1, 2013 6:50 am
Comment by MJ on May 1, 2013 6:51 am

I like gifs.
Comment by MJ on May 1, 2013 6:54 am

FUCK YOU BANANA!

*shakes fist at sky
Comment by leoncaruthers on May 1, 2013 7:23 am

I’m out of coffee. I guess it’s cocoa today.
Comment by leoncaruthers on May 1, 2013 7:27 am

I’ve started watching Red Eye again. Seems pretty much the same as last time I was watching.
Comment by Car in on May 1, 2013 7:29 am

wakey wakey
Comment by Zekexas on May 1, 2013 7:51 am

Coffee Coffee
Comment by Zekexas on May 1, 2013 7:52 am

*Cough*
and a cigarette.
Comment by scott on May 1, 2013 7:53 am

We never run out of coffee.

Never.
Comment by roamingfirehydrant on May 1, 2013 7:59 am

I have a couple of hotel coffee packs just in case. No one likes me when I haven’t had my caffeine.
Comment by roamingfirehydrant on May 1, 2013 8:07 am

HHD is here!