Boy, did I get a lot of hatey email about MJ’s BBF last week. You’d have thought he posted a nude Kerry Marie eating in an oversized bucket of KFC chicken (though that may have been better). Thank God we’ll never know ‘cuz *points thumbs at chest* I got this.
I offer to you today a few lovelies of the Martina variety, none of which are of the Navrátilová ilk, and by ilk I mean homely as fuck. Now, enjoy some music heathen. Oh, and the chicks in the video–all named Martina. True story.
Now onto our feature presentation, Miss Martina Warren
Martina began her modeling career at the age of 3 and moved to California from England to further her modeling (read “waitressing”) career. She was eventually discovered and became Penthouse Pet of the Year 2005. She’s been photographed by some of the best who know how to set their lenses to 34C-24-34 for the best shots.
Here’s a few more photos that she personally emailed to me to share with you, but first, fuck this learning shit and check out your horoscope for today! These are real; toats, I swear.
Aries | Mar 21-Apr 19 | You love to remember how things used to be. Suck it up, buttercup; it is what it is, start drinking because you can’t do a goddamned thing about it. |
Taurus | Apr 20-May 20 | Stop thinking about the good old days, you old fuck; they were not all that good anyways. If you think that the best years are gone, then you are not wrong – STFU and deal with it. |
Gemini | May 21-Jun 21 | This is an excellent time to find a job if you don’t live in the United States. If the work you’re doing now does not make you happy, you may want to consider hooking or becoming a stunt cock. |
Cancer | Jun 22-Jul 22 | You are currently in a romantic relationship and may need to refocus on the future. List your partner’s hopes & dreams and then kiss your ass good-bye because anything you may want ain’t gonna happen. |
Leo | Jul 23-Aug 22 | You have an old love enter your life today, and the news they give you about that STD is not good. Romantic love is not all it is cracked up to be which is why you should always stick with a pro for your personal servicing needs. |
Virgo | Aug 23-Sep 22 | If you’re looking for a way to invest money, you need to pay attention to things retro, like plastics. If you have something hidden away that may bring money, for the love of god keep it hidden or the IRS will surely find a way to fuck you out of it. |
Libra | Sep 23-Oct 23 | You may find that money comes to you today from a very unexpected source. It may not be a huge windfall but it will make a difference to your bookie who’s been patiently waiting to break your legs. |
Scorpio | Oct 24-Nov 21 | If you are experiencing health problems, go to the doctor because it’s probably prostate cancer. You may only need a good blow job, but don’t neglect any possibility that it’s still prostate cancer. |
Sagittarius | Nov 22-Dec 21 | Finances are always a bit difficult the first couple months of the year, so quit being a dumbass at Christmas even though you’ll still never pay it all off. Take your work bonus in the form or meth or ammo and your future is promising. |
Capricorn | Dec 22-Jan 19 | You may have a very pleasant day today. You have literally drawn the wish card and it means that what you are dreaming about is going to be yours. Bwahahahaha, yeah right; now get your ass back to work, slacker. |
Aquarius | Jan 20-Feb 18 | Things are looking up today. Make a point to stop and think about what you want to do in your life. You will be pleasantly surprised at how quickly your dreams to become a pro wrestler will manifest. |
Pisces | Feb 19-Mar 20 | You will suddenly come to the realization today that you have deep fulfillment in your work as a fluffer. You are highly loyal and looking for those to be loyal back to you; don’t count on it. |
I get to meat a Hostage this weekend!!! What are your plans? Really?! Oh, that’s nice.
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Hi Rich!
She seems very nice.
Well done, Cyn.
*throws hands up in the air like a gymnast*
Done!
*throws hands up in the air like a gymnast*
And she STICKS the …. ewwwwwwww….
I see the official
BatBewb Signal has been thown up… ha!And she STICKS the …. ewwwwwwww….
Wha?!? It’s just grape jelly.
I actually have 4 of the beanie babies pictured in September’s horoscope.
I think my mom has a few of those too, Oso; she was going to use them for the boys’ college fund I think (or maybe her meth habit). Seeing the popularity going crazy, she quit collecting them.
I actually have 4 of the beanie babies pictured in September’s horoscope.
Yannow, when I saw that pic I thought “I bet oso has those…”
I didn’t collect-collect them. They were gifted by people that get my obsessions wrong.
Gemini and Aquarius seem nice
They were gifted by people that get my obsessions wrong.
Such a pain when people don’t really ‘get’ our CDO right.
Aquarius? She has flippers not feet.
My beanie baby collection: http://tinyurl.com/auvjmxr
Ha! They do look kinda big from that angle.
I know what they say about men with big feet… is there anything for women with big feet?
My beanie baby collection: http://tinyurl.com/auvjmxr
Niiice
…is there anything for women with big feet?
Trudy posts them on BBF?
I like Trudy. Trudy is my favorite.
is there anything for women with big feet?
https://www.crossdresser.com/index.asp
Oh, I see my error, PISCES, not that whore Aquarius.
Flipper does like the ladies though http://tinyurl.com/alxgofl
Er, wiser, anything you’d like to share with us? This is a safe environment, free from judgement….
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA
I am really impressed by the massive amount of work MJ put into the special effects in his video
Er, wiser, anything you’d like to share with us?
Yes. MCPO is a crossdresser.
He asked me not to tell anyone, but hell, we’re in the new tolerant age, so this shouldn’t cause a big to-do.
And let’s be honest here, is anyone really surprised?
Who knew Flipper was teh ghey?!
She has the perfect face for burying a cock in.
I may need to do more research in this area though.
Does anybody have a list of websites I could maybe browse?
Does anybody have a list of websites I could maybe browse?
Nope.
I swear I do not.
Waitaminute, I’m so confused. I thought flipper was a dude. Now you’re telling me he (she) likes girls and wiser’s linking sites for hairy men who wake up out of the blue to discover they’re Suddenly Fem.
I need a drink….
MJ, Trudy learn surfing from you?
http://tinyurl.com/b6aj84h
here ya go, PG
http://bit.ly/12zb36e
I need a drink….
Don’t you have surgery later?
Good day, motorboaters.
Whoa… depending on your settings, Wiser’s link could be NSFW.
Not that I normally have my settings like that mind you. *cough*
Done with all doctorin’ duties for the weekend! Well rounds on Sunday but that’s it. I do need to drive though to get the little guy from school so….no boozes yet.
Waitaminute, I’m so confused. I thought flipper was a dude. Now you’re telling me he (she) likes girls and wiser’s linking sites for hairy men who wake up out of the blue to discover they’re Suddenly Fem.
It’s like you’re new here or something.
Good job, Cyn. She’s as pretty as the Martina I knew, but lacks the smart-girl glasses.
Martina needs help, RIGHT NOW!
http://tinyurl.com/auox8zh
(rope is OK, right Cyn?)
Thanks, Leon!
Martina with glasses, for LEON ONLY, no one else look!
Rope is OK, so long as it’s not nylon. I heard.
Nice job Cyn.
I don’t generally go for blondes, but I wouldn’t mind Raype Lewising her.
Is it raining at anybody else’s house?
Thank you MJ, and please give my thanks to Trudywhoredog for the vid.
No rain here, but we need a Snowpocalypse2013! photo update, if there’s anyone still alive back there.
It’s raining men at Wiser’s.
It’s raining men at Wiser’s.
Hallelujah
Thanks, Cyn, but I don’t dare click on that link here 🙂
It’s safe, Leon; pinkie swearsies. No worse than our model for today. Really.
The link itself is the problem. Probably blocked.
Ahhh… yeah, I’m guessing that it probably is. Juuuuust a lil’bit.
She has beautiful eyes –
mmmm hips!
Anybody ever watch that show called ‘Up yours, Chris Hayes’ or something? I don’t like that guy.He is a smarmy, smug, clueless, ignorant, intellectually deficient, uncurious parrot of talking points.
IOW, he is a liberal.
meh
“Up Yours, Chris Hayes” could be the ratings bonanza MSNBC has been searching for!
I am sure Wiser would happily lend them his latest avatard.
meh
Found while searching about chris hayes, up yours
Pro tip: If you are going to smuggle a cellphone using unconventional means, turn it off first.
http://www.myfoxdc.com/story/21082025/sri-lanka-prisoner-caught-by-his-ring-tone#axzz2KJXn1XRL
He shoulda just put it on vibrate like MJ does.
Here, hold my beer dude and watch this!
http://www.nejm.org/doi/full/10.1056/NEJMicm0707656
Unless I’m mistaken, that’s a Modelo.
“Here, hold my beer dude and watch this!”
oh, just no!
Si senor, esta Modelo Negra
Too bad it’s not…A CORONA!
>>Too bad it’s not…A CORONA!?
Why, because you would want to insert a lime wedge as well?
Why, because you would want to insert a lime wedge as well?
Hopefully not with salt too.
BLEEZARD OF DEATH report II: Manure losing territory; Piles o’Crap getting frosted white and nearly engulfed by the mounting snowfall.
We don’t need weather underground to know which way the snow blows.
How’s the wine supply?
That’s the real question.
I saw Piles O’Crap open for Mounting Snowfall in Feb 2013.
Mounting Snowfall’s 2nd album was crap! What a bunch of sellouts!
http://www.happyplace.com/21148/relationship-guide-for-how-much-effort-you-should-put-into-valentines-day
I have to go buy ice cream for Valentine’s. Might shop for a suit while I’m out.
I have to go buy ice cream for Valentine’s
Kinky
3400 flights cancelled today.
This will seem like a small number tomorrow.
Dayum – I’m glad you made it home when you did, Dave.
The daughter is no longer dating ‘the boy’. She said she will not break her streak of not getting a Valentines from someone other than her mother.
*small huff out nose*
nice job cyn.
today’s winner is heartaerola.
and she does have nice eyes.
question: can people still tweet from their phone if the power goes out?
Dave, are you at home or are you stuck somewhere?
I made it home. Yesterday I was in the first storm that’s hitting NE now. They get to deal with that one and another one.
Great news! Bibi Jones is dusting off her…something, and getting back into pr0n. Disappointing yield on the image search for her. Is she a BBF alumna?
http://tinyurl.com/atnu2dx
Yes. Two storms are supposed to meet up and make a baby right over us.
WARNING: Link has naked man with a fake football covering his bits
He needs a really big football to cover his junk. Hellooooo!
Two storms are supposed to meet up and make a baby right over us.
And if there’s a power outage, there will be lots of other snowmageddon babies 9 months from now.
I saw Snowmageddon Babies open for Dread Zeppelin in ’97.
We won’t have an outage. We have a brand new generator.
Can’t happen.
Probably not now, Laura. Stupid Murphy.
Congrats on your gennie laura. Got mine 2 years ago and we’ve had three prolonged (12-18 hour) outages since. I wasn’t in Maine for the ice storm in ’98 but the lady I bought this house from said she had no power for 8 days. That’s a long time to run the woodstove.
http://tinyurl.com/a8ubrwl
They showed the people clearing out the store shelves this morning, including a woman who bought a small bundle of wood, saying she was now prepared for the power to go out. I’m thinking 4, 5 hours max.
That made me LOL, Mare!
We lost power last year twice, for almost a week each time. There was a cold snap during the second outage. That sucked.
I am so glad you guys got a generator.
Let it snow.
*hig-fives Hotspur*
You said it, Sugar.
It made me laugh too, Cyn, especially after my “cut my own bangs” experience last night.
Mane troubles? Here, have a treat to forget your troubles
http://tinyurl.com/bjjs75z
You’re a sweetie, Jimbro.
I know it’s not an easy decision, but I think it’s finally time his family put him in a home…
One of the greatest poats in history, I give it 4 of these thingies >>>>
Cyn, who are you meating this weekend?
Also, I just clicked on the “nice” link. EXCELLENT MJ!!!
Making electricity with gasoline.
SCIENCE!
Did you know you can make gasoline with electricity?
It’s just a little inefficient, but you can synthesize octane from the atmosphere. Yet another reason to build umpty-dozen breeder reactors.
Joe Bastardi says we’re due for 3 to 4 weeks of a “Siege of Storms”
In other news Punxsutawney Phil is a lying sack of shit
Mr. and Mrs. Pupster are in town for some kind of porn video industry event. Squeeeee!
I may do some discounted shopping after I meat them. *cough*
Mrs. Pupster and I will be meeting with Cyn tomorrow here in Scottsdale, AZ. Cyn told me to make sure Mrs. Pupster had at least 2 drinks before she got there, I’m not sure why.
HAHAHAH!
Psych.
That jerk, he told me he was in “security”.
Probably buys condoms and soap for the sets.
HAHAHA! Timing!
Hey – did you get my email about the time and the cosplay outfit choices?
Use lots of lip gloss, Cyn. It accentuates your lips in pics.
I thought it was Oso.
Good call. You ~do~ know how to take care of me, mare.
Yeah, but I’m having trouble finding that many bullwhips on such short notice. Are riding crops acceptable?
Oso is later this month for the reenactment of Thelma & Louise. Squeeee!
Riding crops are so VHS. I’ll just bring my stash, Pups.
SQUEEEEEEE!!!!!
With special guest star b-rad pitc.
I think it’s finally time his family put him in a home…
He’s still fucking that chicken.
I’d steer clear of the “grab box” discount stuff if I were you
used
With special guest star b-rad pitc.
———————————————-
Fluffer?
Hey – did you get my email about the time and the cosplay outfit choices?
My jealous fury grows beyond the bounds of good taste.
Thanks for the ProTip™, Dave. *winks and finger guns ya*
———————————–
AXEMAN PICK UP TIME!
I’d love to head over to AZ to see Cyn and throw a ball for pupster. I just can’t get away right now.
My jealous fury grows beyond the bounds of good taste.
*sniffs haughtily*
*kicks self in the newts for not visiting Cyn when in PHX*
*kicks self in the newts for not visiting Cyn when in PHX*
Damn straight. I’m still kicking myself for not making it to CT.
I’m still looking at pics of the PHX pillow fight.
“He’s still fucking that chicken.”
Well said, Roamy.
I’m still looking at pics of the PHX pillow fight.
Hahahahahahaha. That was great.
The Five: Must watch on Ben Carson, MD at prayer breakfast
Jonah Goldberg from NRO Goldberg File:
“t might just be an illusion, but it certainly seems like having an exotic and mellifluous name gives you a leg up on NPR. The reason I say it might be an illusion is that many of the most exotic names come from foreign correspondents from countries where “John Smith” probably sounds weird. Also, any word sounds different if you focus on it or say it enough times over and over again. And the mellifluousness of the names might simply be the result of practice by the correspondents. I presume NPR teaches people how to speak with euphony. Certainly Ofeibea Quist-Arcton and Sylvia Poggioli have mastered the craft.
Still, with those caveats in mind, it certainly seems like the exotically named are over-represented at NPR: Mandalit del Barco, Soraya Sarhaddi Nelson, Yuki Noguchi, Lakshmi Singh, Doualy Xaykaothao, Neda Ulaby, etc. I don’t really care — but I think it’s fun to imagine that NPR names are stripper names. Maybe someone can come up with a game to find out what your NPR name might be.”
Too funny
Best dancing rake guy ever
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_LZjhEHQdLg
OK, the wind finally got here.
I’ve been watching a line of crows leaving for hours, hundreds of them, and just now a huge hawk went by, going in the same direction.
Some more Robert Palmer.
i swear, if anyone on FB says anything bad about Dr. Carson, I’m calling them a racist.
Re: Ace’s post about Hagel – he hasn’t disclosed his foreign holdings and income, personally or as part of the thinktank Atlantic Council. Heat’s already on because Menendez has false financial disclosures.
Best dancing rake guy ever
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_LZjhEHQdLg
He was great.
I don’t think I’ve ever heard a bad Robt. Palmer tune. Loved that guy. Covers and all.
*lashes down Scott & Laura to their bed so as not to be blown away*
Oh Cyn is in for a treat- mrs pupster is really cool!!
Puoster’s not too bad either. Just be prepared for him to look ten years younger than his pol picture.
Oh, and his name isn’t Pupster.
Dammit!
It’s not??!!?? WTH!
This is everyone in New England yesterday
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i6zaVYWLTkU
#12 is so me, it’s scary:
http://tinyurl.com/6kqpwh3
When I was a kid.
Hahahahahaha. Mr. RFH has taken on the task of labeling forty-bazillion digital pictures. Pic of meatup. “Who’s this?” “[Cuffy’s real name]” “No, what’s his Hostage name. They only get one name, and I don’t know who the heck [real name] is. I’m not learning two names.” “Cuffy” “Thank you.”
I call all Hostages by their real names. Leon is Leon. Wiser is Wiser. Etc.
Mine is pretty simple, but it does contain geographical info.
Good plan Mr. Spur
I thought Wiser was Richard.
When I first started commenting at Ace’s, I went by my email name, C in AZ. It took months for people to figure out I wasn’t a dude.
My real name is not Phil Collins.
Internet Law: Everyone is a fat guy living in his parent’s basement until proven otherwise.
Ooooo that reminds me; I’d better scrub off the Cheetos orange from under my nails before tomorrow!
Is snow up to anyone’s balls yet?
Is that like, “As high as an elephant’s eye”, sort of phrase?
Is snow up to anyone’s balls yet?
MJ.
Is snow up to anyone’s balls yet?
——————————————
Is Trudy a bitch or a stud?
Timing
Internet Law: Everyone is a fat guy living in his parent’s basement until proven otherwise.
*glances at Mare*
No, my first name ain’t baby. It’s Janet. Miss Jackson, if you nasty.
It would explain why no one’s met “her”.
I thought MJ and Mare were one in the same, “MmareJ”.
Wiserbud is Richard. Wiser is Wiser.
NASTY!
Color of your pants + last thing you ate = your band name
I guess I’m Black Walnuts.
Racist.
MJ is in Blue Penis?
*glances at Mare*
That cuts a leeeeeettle close to the truth.
GRAMMA, BRING ME DOWN SOME CHIPS!!! AND DIET DR PEPPER TOO!!!
Scott, are youse snowed in yet?
Gonna go watch this tool in his rice-mo-bile try to drive up the snowy street. Better’n TeeVee.
Well, shit. He got about 60 feet up & mashed into the curb & then gave up & rolled back to Maple street. No fun at all.
Only because there is nowhere to go. It is snowing sideways now, so it shouldn’t take long before we are.
Khaki Garden Salad
We got about two inches. The sky is clear now but the sun is setting.
But his ricer was making impressive VRRRRPPPP noises the whole time, so there’s that.
green roast beef
Khaki Salad Dressing would be better.
I turned the A/C off at 5pm today
Heather Green Homemade Anchovy Pizza
Khaki Curry sounds like it ought to be a prep school band in England.
Pink Vagina
Khaki Curry and Black Walnuts should definitely do a gig together
And then hook up with Pink Vagina’s groupies
Black Beef-a-Roni.
Snowfall rate on Long Island is 3″ per hour with thunder and lightning.
That should be here in an hour or so.
Thundersnow!
Blue Cube Steak
Thundersnow!
Oh man, I remember skiing in one of those once; it felt like the lightning was about 100 feet overhead and the thunder was rolling through me. Scared the bejesus outta me.
It’s raining here.
puce terrapin
>> 3″ an hour
3 minutes in heaven is better than 1 minute in heaven.
Rain! Snow! Rain!
Graupel.
derp
Stefan Grapelli
Tan Kibble
Where’s mare?
http://holyloly.blogspot.com/2013/01/mondayrage.html
Hey Leon, do they have this class at your gym?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y4oT2tM06qo
Thousand yard stare
http://gifb.in/yKsV
THUNDERSNOW!!!!
Brown spotted dick.
P.s.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spotted_dick
Why am I getting email advertising:
Chinese Dating Women?
I think it has something to do with Xbrad.
Brown spotted dick.
——————————
I’d have your prostate checked, sounds serious
Scott, you mentioned earlier that a day of driving in that bad shit made your whole body hurt. I only did it for two hours yesterday, so just my knuckles.. and maybe my left big toe.
A day.. whew. Ain’t sure I could hang.
Pepe, I don’t know, I don’t do classes. I’d go to that one.
… for now.
Sup flamers.
Scott, you mentioned earlier that a day of driving in that bad shit made your whole body hurt.
I’ve driven in rain like that. Ouchies afterward.
Tushar
How much English food rubbed off on Indians?
You’re just in time for the debriefing, MJ.
Oh, and FTR:
Nude Pizza
mmmmm……cupcakes
Wish I had some heavy cream, and my old ice cream maker that required crushed or shaved ice.
Fine snow made the best ice cream in that thing.
Let’s start by telling me why the cucumbers are all missing. WTF?
Did anybody eat all the cashews out of anybody else’s mixed nuts today?
I don’t know nuthin about no cucumbers.
We made snow ice cream when I was a kid in Alabama.
In Texas, not so much.
Wouldn’t nude pizza just be bread?
Autocucumbers.
WAIT.
Were the cucumbers purple?
Nope. don’t know nuthin about them.
Cashews aren’t nuts.
Wouldn’t nude pizza just be bread?
That would be my band name. From ^^ up there, earlier.
Cashews are droops.
Also, assault cucumbers.
This snow is bigger than predicted.
http://tinyurl.com/6a8v7le
Purple? Can’t tell…wait a minute
Moops.
I prefer the Macadama nuts.
>>>This snow is bigger than predicted.
Please to explain…..
I’m already not working at the store in the morning. Should I not plan to go the radio station tomorrow as well?
(Please?)
Mixed nut containers at Sams Club are smaller at the same price.
>> This snow is bigger than predicted.
I predicted this.
*gets bored, buys exercise video and wart remover, wraps it in empty Godiva chocolates box, mails it to LauraW, signs the card Happy Valentine’s Day, Love, Scott.
Waits for hilarity to ensue.*
Cashews are nuts. Freedom is slavery.
I thought radio announcers were Essential Personnel? The public needs your updates. Get yourself in by dogsled if need be.
Radio announcer voice: “And now, Tales From Topographic Oceans by Yes”
*goes to take a shit*
*runs outside naked*
*buys beer*
*replaces head-gasket on a 1977 305*
*comes back & we’re only halfway through The Ancients*
*kills self*
Holy crap, can’t see the house across the street.
It’s here.
>>How much English food rubbed off on Indians?
Well, lets see. English food is very bland and boring. I suppose we picked up bread and toast from them. Any may be egg omelletes. Cakes and cookies. But that is about it.
The English didn’t really have much culinary expertise to share.
Tushar – Which is why the Brits eat Indian takeout 3 nights a week!
Pork cracklings are English. I would kill a pig for some pork cracklings.
Is it one of the biggest you’ve seen, Scott? Or just BS media ratings hype?
I have cleared the driveway twice. Tomorrow it will look like I didn’t do a thing.
Grey Crunch N Munch
My mom just lost power in Middleboro, MA and sister says Foxboro, MA is a mess. Miss Jimbro is working till 10 and has to drive home in snow…luckily the worst of it will hit us after she gets home.
It’s funny, to a guy from Texas, an inch an hour seems like a big deal.
I’m trying to get my brain wrapped around that shit Scott is seeing, which is way worse. I remember something like it, when I saw an actual blizzard at Offut AFB in 1987. No visibility and snowdrifts over ten feets.
…
I’m wearing shorts outside tonight.
Are you getting much at all, Tushar?
It’s already impressive Cyn and it’s supposed to keep up for another 8 hours. Records will be falling.
Is Scott playing Sisyphus?
Have you used any of the orange wood yet?
Ugh. A friend of ours is supposed to be released from hospital tomorrow. I hope he doesn’t have to stay longer because of fucking snow.
Cyn, we got rain till 1-2 pm, then some tiny hail, and the some snow. Not impressive at all. Kids were hoping for a neat pile to play in. So far, it is piss poor.
Yep, if you’ve seen my Facechimp, the snow is now exactly one Sam Adams longneck deep on my deck.
Hahaha Cyn
Scott – Save the cannibalism until Sunday. You can survive on chips and snow melt until then.
Hooo-leee shit! Sew your buttholes shut, or you’ll get duodenal drifts: http://radar.weather.gov/ridge/Conus/northeast_loop.php
Holyshit, that’s already impressive, Andy.
Can you link a pic here?
Is Scott playing Sisyphus?
The snow sounds bad enough, hopefully there aren’t any boulders.
This ugly band has been over us for well over an hour
http://classic.wunderground.com/radar/mixedcomposite.asp?region=a5&size=2x&type=loop
That would suck for your friend, Stark, but I promise you that his HIC will not authorize that. No way no how.
>>>I thought radio announcers were Essential Personnel?
Announcers? Perhaps. Unpaid producers? Not so much, in my opinion.
Already have a foot of snow and we’re just starting to get the good stuff.
Hooo-leee shit!
Yikes; you’ll get a piece of that action.
No Spotted Dick or Yorkshire or Christmas pudding?
I guessed as much but was curious
Thanks Tush
>>>I have cleared the driveway twice. Tomorrow it will look like I didn’t do a thing.
Which is why I ain’t doing shit until this is over.
We sent Bubba outside to take a leak. 30 seconds later a pure white dog ran onto the porch. He looked like a little polar bear.
I have not laughed that hard in a long long time.
Day-um, Scott.
It hasn’t been grilling weather Vmax. Soon.
Scott invited me outside to see the whiteout. I ran down the driveway and back with a parka over my jammies and slippers. Couldn’t see the house across the street, from the end of the driveway. Crazy. Ran back. My dog followed me. He lingered a moment to pee on the snowbank. So he was outside for maybe 30 seconds.
Black dog left the house, white dog returned.
Plastered and crusted white from head to tail by the wind-whipped snow. He looked so stupid. Scott and I laughed a gut-buster.
You had to be there. Trust me, it was funny as hell.
I wanted to take a leak in the snow yesterday but.. traffic.
>>> He looked like a little polar bear.
Heh. Tiki keeps looking outside then looking at me as if to say “make it stop, please?”
Probably going to Boston in April. What should I see while I’m there?
Black dog left the house, white dog returned.
Ruh-roh…
>>>Probably going to Boston in April. What should I see while I’m there?
Us.
“What should I see while I’m there?”
A bunch of us for dinner.
Yeah, my wife & I chatted with the nurse a bit about that. She seemed pretty leery. Well, even if we can’t rescue him, I’ll ride my bike over to visit since he’s only about a mile away.
It’s okay Sean, no worries.
Bubba is not a racist dog. He’s an asshole dog.
He hates everybody, and everybody hates him.
Falling at 4″ per hour now
>>>He hates everybody, and everybody hates him.
Not me. But then, I don’t sit in his spot.
Pepe, it will be the highlight of your trip visiting with those peeps. Do it!
>>>I wanted to take a leak in the snow yesterday but.. traffic.
Bad idea. The snow gets really cold when your……
Never mind.
I remember February in NH when the snow plows piled 30′ banks on either side of the road and ice had cars careening side to side down hills dodging uphill traffic if possible.
Falling at 4″ per hour now
Is that a lot for snow? We get that in rain, sometimes in 15 minutes increments, and we grab our life jackets.
And if you do one of those duck boat tours I will mock you forever.
5″ per hour.
I don’t hate Bubba.
But I do respect him with the, carefulness.
>> Bad idea. The snow gets really cold when your……
That was on my mind, wind blowing, snow, and 30 degrees. I pretty much hate taking a.. with cold hands.. well. you know.
*hunker down my friend*
Is there anything we can fight about tonight? Aja and Can’t Buy a Thrill? We left that one hanging
An inch of rain per hour = 12″ of snow
Will let you guys know when I know exact dates I’ll be there. You guys might be NSFW, not safe for wife. 😉
>>>Is that a lot for snow?
Do the math. This storm could last up to 28 hours….
You guys might be NSFW, not safe for wife.
We actually clean up pretty good, Pepe. Most of the time. Usually.
No Math!! You’re not my real Dad!!
>>>You guys might be NSFW, not safe for wife.
We are always on our vest behavior around significant others.
In fact, that’s how Laura’s and wiserbride became friends, despite the fact that wiserbride does not hang out here.
>> Can you link a pic here?
Too much work.
>> A bunch of us for dinner.
*raises hand*
I’m in.
>>>Is there anything we can fight about tonight? Aja and Can’t Buy a Thrill? We left that one hanging
Meh.. It’s Steely Dan. Did they release a bad album?
Is that a lot for snow? We get that in rain, sometimes in 15 minutes increments, and we grab our life jackets.
That amount of rain is far more life-threatening in the short-term than that amount of snow.
But on the other hand, it drains off the road and goes away on its own in a day or so. You don’t need to shovel rainfall. This snow could be here for a while.
If I never see another snowflake, I’ll be OK with that.
*hugs wiser*
no, they did not.
…
don’t touch me there again.
I get the idea of being confident while driving in snow, but the fuckers around here are just trying to kill somebody.
Dan is already saying “It puts the lotion on its skin” about our Thelma & Louise meat up in PHX. He thinks everyone is a serial killer.
wiser was spinning this record at the station the other day:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vc2YBVZx-Ps
it features some of the hostagae
>> This snow could be here for a while.
I was always a little amazed, driving through Baldwinsville NY to our DC there in Feb, seeing the snow plow pile they made in the corner of the parking lot.. still melting off in April.
Bubba didn’t hate me. But I think he found it intriguing that I was a man with shellfish juice dripping from his fingers.
I assure you, Cyn is not a cereal killer.
No one knew I was in PHX the first time I visited. If she’s skinned and roasted me, anyone who missed me (yeah…..) would likely have been looking in Oregon for me.
He thinks everyone is a serial killer.
Well, not EVERYone.
I was nervous my first time too. It didn’t hurt all that much afterall.
Dan should be afraid of Cyn. She is dangerous.
He should put a knife in his boot.
HAHAHAHA! I had forgotten that you were a surprise guest, Xbrad. And then me having to rescue you on the freeway. Damn, that was a good time.
Just you hush your mouth, Scott!!
Dan is going to feel like an idiot.
I don’t think I’m even going to get to meat Dan. Just a tiger and a bear hanging out together.
>> He should put a knife in his boot.
HAHAHAHA.
Thanks for not cuttin me in Boston.
Who among us has never met any other hostages ever? Those are the people I suspect are potential serial killers.
dave, the lake effect from b’ville to adams is impressive. the odd thing is, a few miles away we might only get a dusting of snow-
I felt like an idiot.
jam, all I know is after only 2 and a half hours of driving through that shit yesterday, the shit I dealt with is like one tenth of what they’re dealing with now.
sore. knuckles. sheeee-it
You’re in that swath of snowhell too, huh, Jam.
Girls night!!!
Cyn and I need a Lion. I don’t think we have a Lion, oh my!
>>>>Who among us has never met any other hostages ever?
D’uh. Mare.
>> I felt like an idiot.
You don’t know people till you meet em. I can’t count the times we’ve hugged since.
…
Don’t tell nobody.
…
oh shit I just did
Glad you gots a generator.
Leave that to me, Oso; I’ll find us a lion.
Rawr
Chuck.
>>>You’re in that swath of snowhell too, huh, Jam.
I don’t think Jam’s gettinguch from this storm, but he gets this kind of stuff constantly, so it’ normal for him.
Sorry, I think Mare prefers Charles.
Testa?
Scott just had me look out from the porch door again and have another look at the snowdrift formations. My truck has a wing on it now. So does the porch roof.
Nyte all
Oh, haha, not me, I kill people in large groups, hahahahaha. Ha.
Ha.
Cyn, i live a little south of it now, but i have vivid memories of tucking in behind plow trucks just to make it back home or to school…. the snow fall rates are impressive but coupled with wind and drifts it gets old quick
Dan is like Mrs. MJ in MJ Hostage Theater. So far he has liked my friends from TAS that he has met. I’m trying to get him to go to a Reunion with me in Vegas.
Is the wind teh howling?
>>>You don’t know people till you meet em. I can’t count the times we’ve hugged since.
I spent the entire drive to my first meet-up explains to wiserbride that it was okay to ask me to leave at any time.
But then we met the W’s.
No lie, we were on our way out the door after about 90 minutes. We spent the next coupla hours talking to Scott and Lauraw, and on the ride home, wiserbride kept saying “wow… I really like those people..”
When I was traveling, I never had a bad mini-meetup. Never.
Scott and Laura lose phone service,
hear a knock on the door,
evil doll from a couple of weeks ago is sitting there……………
15″ now
Laura gets Scott to show him the doll,
doll is gone,
hears noise in kitchen…………
>> wiserbride kept saying “wow… I really like those people..”
I credit them for wiserbride putting up with me. Later I learned to like you because of her,
All serial aside, haven’t we all had some amazing friendships forge from this nonsense?
I cherish it. I do.
I didn’t say that aloud and I will deny it tomorrow when you’re digging out. Mostly.
When I was traveling, I never had a bad mini-meetup. Never.
You sure?
All serial aside, haven’t we all had some amazing friendships forge from this nonsense?
Yep. It’s all been kinda neato how that’s worked.
wiserdude, hows the shoveling goin’?
Seems like a snow blower would be in order.
NO SHOVELING HEART ATTACKS for any of the NE PEEPERS!
>>>All serial aside, haven’t we all had some amazing friendships forge from this nonsense?
If not for the meet-ups, I’d never had a vegetable garden, my truck would still be stuck in my backyard, and we would have frozen to death when my furnace died, just to name a few benefits…
Black BBQ Brisket Pizza. Band name.
I’m just kinda humbled by it all.. watching you die in the blizzard.
I feel bad about the towels now. Mrs Wiserbud likely thought I was ok before that stuff.
I apologize.
>>>wiserdude, hows the shoveling goin’?
Neighbor’s dad has a plow on his pickup.
I ain’t shoveling nothing ’til this is over.
I need a NE baseball vacation. Only way I’ll make it up there.
“Seems like a snow blower would be in order.”

like this?
Haha! Exactly, Jam. I’ll just stand off to one side to watch tho TYVM.
>>>I apologize.
No worries. We burned them.
But I am occasionally amazed by the deep, honest, real-world friendships that I’ve made through this stoopid blog.
Boggles my mind when I think that, without this place, I would have never met people that I now consider my closest friends in the world.
Btw, this storm’s name is Nemo.
It is kinda amaze agog.
I preferred Clusterfluff.
http://www.abc24.com/news/local/story/Arlington-High-Parents-Angry-over-Student-Survey/IOxGSMoveEePmUVOEwmlbA.cspx?rss=59
>>>You sure?
Yep. Come on, we laughed like hell…
Just teasing. It was fun hanging and drinking with you and Sean.
Fuckin’ quitter.
I won over Scott and Wiserbud. Skeptics if you ever saw.
I credit my smile. And keeping my hands where they could see em.
Mostly my smile, and the sparkle in my pretty hazel eyes.
All stupid aside, I have friendships I never could have imagined, had it not been for Al Gore inventing these interwebs.
I interrupt this FIF reunion to report the following news:
After graduating from BU, a high quality university which had the sense to kick Dave in Texas out, in December of ’10, pendehodaughter #1 has been working at shitjobs in the health care sector and taking occasional extra class at a juco and shit so that she can maybe fuck around and get admitted to a graduate school in the field of Occupational Therapy. Today, February 8th, 2013, she was admitted to Texas Tech University Health Sciences Center’s school of OT. She’s 23 and I’m pretty sure I can see the light at the end of the tunnel for her.
I. Am. Fucking. Releived.
Thanks for listening. Now go back to your regularly scheduled programing.
>>>I credit my smile. And keeping my hands where they could see em.
That, and you interest in the temperature of the water in Long Island Sound….
Most excellent update, PG! Go, girl, go!
>>>Fuckin’ quitter.
Hey, someone had to work in the morning….
Pendejo, I have cousin with a OT degree from TT. She has a great job in San Antonio. (I’m Hispanic. I have LOTS of cousins) Congrats to PGdaughter!
I meant Sean.
>>>I. Am. Fucking. Releived
Awesome news, PG.
Congrats to l’il PG….
Okay… That’s just weird…
I think you guys would be fun to watch baseball with.
There’s enough of us to BE a baseball game.
Pendejo,
that requires a celebratory drink…
http://tinyurl.com/aoecy3b
I don’t play. I keep a very tidy scorecard. With pitch count.
You’re hired, girlie
congrats PG! Wonderful news. It’s so fine to watch our children move on.
I am the worst guy to watch baseball games with, because I always score em
I score Spring Training. After the 5th Inning it gets tricky.
There was a book a few years back with scorecards from “Great” games. I hinted, but Dan thought I was insane.
Thanks everybody. I’m very pumped and relieved at the same time.
Oso, I understand the multiple cousins thing. I gots a degree in Mathematics myself. Congrats on su prima o primo. San Antonio’s a good town.
jam2……somebody sent me a bottle of bourbon that looks just like that for a secret santa gift a year or so back. They don’t sell that brand around here. At least not at the chicken shit liquor stores I frequent. It’s pretty good shit for bourbon. Best I recall.
G’night cool kids. Sweet dreams and such.
See, when I say that, the vice squad shows up.
Stopping in for a minute between being sick,
Pepe and Oso, meeting the hostages is effortless/painless.
When I met Xbrad and BiW at Engine House #9 in Tacoma, it was like we had known each-other for years. Instant familiarity and relaxed conversation. Like getting together with old friends.
No-worries…
I’m not lucky enough to be celebrating w bourbon or anyother kind of whiz tonight. Got off work to late to hit the liquor stores, which close at 900pm in TX. Had to settle for this shit.
http://is.gd/32u77A
My Sam’s Club lost a pallet of Evan. I’m drinking Jim Beam tonight. Still better than Bud Light.
Yeah, I know. Let the booing and hissing begin.
I prolly could’ve driven up to Jal and bought a fifth of Crown, but I was to lazy.
PG,
“too”
/Hotspur
We’re getting a Total Wine in 2 weeks. Local news is complaining about Big Box booze stores. I love Total Wine. Now, I don’t have to stock up in PHX or LV.
ChrisP
I actually thought about that shit right after I hit “post comment”.
It reminded me of that one time I dreamed about sucking another guy’s dick. I don’t talk about it much any more.
What kinds of beer do they sell at a “Total Wine” store?
/>unredeemable redneck
They sell EVERYTHING at a Total Wine store. It is like an alcoholic’s Disneyland. Or something.
Last measurement before I go to sleep:
20″
kuhl
Stay warm and safe, people of the cabal.
Last measurement before I go to sleep:
20″
I got thrown out of a casino in Vegas for saying this at a blackjack table one time, but it is apprapos in this case:
Ooooohhhhh nigga you is lawdge!!!!
I was commenting on the fact that my African-American friend was holding two kings.
It didn’t matter.
Hahaha
a Wiser morning:

Motherfucker is just standing there. Doing nuthin!!!!
Maybe i”ve gotten to(o) used to pupster’s gifs.
PG,
i’d send you another one, however you live so far outside of civilization that freight costs are in the “WTF!!!!?” range. And also the shipping nazis would sic the revenuers on me
No Need. I appreciate the first one. REally cool bottle and plug on top. What’s the story on that distillery?
Does pupster talk in gifs?
Si mija.
it’s part of buffalo trace (not sure if that’s spelted right -fuck you spelling nazis) it’s a decent Kentucky offering… i sample a couple of different (new) distilleries each year (i lurve bourbon) and if memory serves, blanton was decent.
espanol este muerte!!
I was pondering songwriters and Wiser’s cover theory. If you write a song and someone else sings your song, and you become big enough to record the song you wrote, which song is the cover?
Does the song belong to the person who wrote it? The person that made it popular? The person that got to release it later as a song he wrote?
That’s some deep shit, oso.
What are you smoking?
No longer smoke. Drinking Jim Beam.
Strike 3. G’night y’all.
I just remembered I was supposed to own the comments BEFORE I say “G’night”. Waits for the daily derp.
You know I’ll give you television,
I’ll give you eyes of blue
I’ll give you a man who wants to rule the derp
Both kids I worked with tonight had never heard of Monty Python. No movies; no skits; no actors. Tabula Rasa.
H8. Pure H8.
I don’t play. I keep a very tidy scorecard. With pitch count.
————-
Hawt. I would love to watch a game with you guys. Looks like we’re bailing on her stepmom’s wedding (don’t ask) and Mrs MJ doesn’t want to see my family for Christmas. That should free up some $ for gum travel.
Feb: Atlanta, NY
March: Mass, Miami
Oh and maybe Louisville/Lexington at the beginning of March. Not sure.
Holy crap.
History made.
Front door.
The mirror on the van is about 6 feet up, the red thing is a Ford Ranger pickup truck.
http://is.gd/asyo81
wakey wakey
6 foot drifts.
This is amazing.
Official snow measurement at casa Andy: Fuckin’ Deep!
I let the dog out, he had to swim back.
Don’t Keel yourselves shoveling all that white stuff out of the drive.
Heh
The high today is predicted to be 77
I would brag about how cold it is if I move to Minot so Wiser can still ban me.
What red thing?
Holy crap. Is it still coming down?
I have some more pictures on Facechimp, but here’s my deck …
Yesterday: http://www.flickr.com/photos/55294087@N05/8457514199/
15 minutes ago: http://www.flickr.com/photos/55294087@N05/8457514615/
The Lauraw’s should just have the flying monkey remove the snow.
I just hope the pile of horse crap is ok.
I hope it hasn’t stopped steaming. How’s she going to stir it? Crimmney, someone unbury that thing so we can check on it.
holy carp!
When I lived in New England I did not see snow doors. Can anyone open the doors in snowmageddon?
Plows are stuck all over the place.
It just got warm here.
http://www.foxnews.com/entertainment/2013/02/09/kate-upton-is-sports-illustrated-cover-girl-for-second-year/
Patio.
Bump on the left is Big Green Egg, bump on the right is Webber grill
http://is.gd/0AfACb
OK, I’m going to run the snowblower for a while.
I’ll get some official measurements.
Scott, you may want to remve the snow from the grills before you start smoking/grilling something.
Wow, none of you fruitcups has killed this terrible post?
2 feet and still snowing like a mo’fo. Drifts are 3′ off the deck.
We were suppose to host a practice event at the wife’s dog training center today. Um, No.
Have at least 2 inches of snow inside the screened in porch – snow is blowing that much.
Is the crap pile melting anything?
They’re not talking, MJ.
Those who have not watched this speech yet, watch it now!
http://www.realclearpolitics.com/video/2013/02/07/dr_benjamin_carson_addresses_national_prayer_breakfast_criticizes_obamacare.html
It’s three degrees here.
Guess I won’t go running.
I’ve heard bits of that speech-and what I want to know is what Obama thought during it.
You’d think SOMEONE would have asked him.
*crickets
They’re not talking, MJ.
They’re saving their breath for more shoveling.
You’d think SOMEONE would have asked him
They’ve banned or intimidated everyone who would.
You mean like Willy Nelson? Neil Diamond?
The whole concept of the “cover song” gets back to the weird notion we have that the singer & the songwriter should be the same person. It’s a dumb idea that leads to stupid shit like Shrill Cow claiming writing credit for an entire album on which she wrote absolutely nothing.
I can’t help but notice, as I awook a few minutes ago, that only the top string of my garden fence is visible. That top string being three feet from the ground.
Holy shit.
awook? Are you a Wookie?
awook? Are you a Wookie?
She’ll be better prepared for the Snowmaggedon if she was. They’ve got that fur and stuff.
Power’s out>>>generator humming along.
Storm’s still blowing fiercely.
Plow man AWOL (I don’t blame him, I’d wait too)
I’ve lived here since ’99 and never seen this much snow.
Tushar: Those comments from Dr. Carson made me feel happy in the swimsuit area….we’ll see him vilified soon.
We still have power here (in magical Hamster Land, the Newer), but wow is it still coming down. I’d hate to have to measure it in metric.
“Crazy” was written by Willie Nelson
“Who among us has never met any other hostages ever? Those are the people I suspect are potential serial killers.”
lol
*continues to tape POL pictures of those whose comments irritate me on the wall of my room painted black, cement floor, large drain in center, surgical steel table (with splash guards).
This is the first time I have ever had to shovel underneath a car.
Why bother, Scott? You’re not able to go anywhere, right?
I have had to shovel under several cars. Usually after they’ve gotten stuck.
Mailbox is AWOL.
Jimbro, the thing that resonated with me the most is that we have given up governing to the lawyers. We need people with all kinds of real worlld experiences to run things. When it comes to real world experience, lawyers are lowest grade life forms. We, the doctors and engineers and farmers and builders and plumbers and mechanics and soldiers and nurses and waiters and cooks and traders and businessmen and machinists and janitors have to snatch back the reigns of power from the unholy cabal of lawyers, journalists, career politicians and criminals and celebrities and bureaucrats.
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