From Henry the Elf
I hope Santa was nice to you!
December 25, 2012
Categories: Floyd, Man-Lesbian, Master Henry . . Author: Rosetta
xbrad, sorry for pushing you down like a fat woman.
Dude, that kid of yours is your exact replica plus head on hair minus beard minus douchiness.
Um, hair on head.
Made some redskin taters with rosemary and savory, popped in under the roast. Should be roasted about the same time the roast is rested.
That poor child
Ahahahahah! You are dressing the future man that will be selecting your retirement community.
Makes me wonder if this is how that Peter Pan guy started out.
HAHAHA! Wait until Rosetta shows this to Henry’s first girlfriend!
Henry in first picture is thinking he’s totally gonna flush the remote. The next picture is him trying to talk Floyd into running away from home.
Rosie, why does your sissy dog need a blanket on his back to go outside?
I didn’t think Missouri got that cold.
Our Appaloosa needs a blanket, but she’s something of a hard keeper.
Oh, Merry Christmas everyone and Happy Holidays to those going out for Chinese today!
Goose is on the grill.
Time for wine.
My Christmas post at IB early this morning:
Weirdest Christmas Morning Ever
This involves a fire truck at 2:30 a.m., a scared dog hiding in the laundry room, potato bread and bacon.
Merry Christmas, and Henry looks super cute!
And I can’t believe how big he’s getting!
Drink it, Hotspur!
Thanks, Ted, don’t mind if I do.
Merry Chrimmas, everybody!
Whoever sent me the Instakilt, I’ve worn it watching movies the past two nights.
It looked like female handwriting on the label.
My poor dog has failing kidneys, thus I don’t dare give her the ribs from the roast.
Chickens’ll get ’em tomorrow.
Merry Christmas everybody!
xbrad sent me the Crap Tree ornaments. He was pretty sneaky, I didn’t figure it out.
We need to see a photo of the Crap Tree.
I so just wanted to send Dave an ornament for the SS.
I figured I shouldn’t use my power for evil though, so I went the honest route.
Everyone got names from random choosing. I tried to double check, and hopefully no one got a rerun.
You done good.
Merry Christmas, everyone.
Cooking a goose. That’s some Dickensian shit right there.
I made my clerk work this morning without any heat. Plus, fuck that little crippled kid of his.
Now, that’s some Dickensian shit.
Time to go visit the in-laws. Wish me luck and safety.
Sean’s just making shit up so he can get back together with Karen Allen.
Clever plan, really.
Good luck, Leon. Don’t pinch the MIL’s butt when no one is looking.
You did great. Thank you Car in!
Good call, I’ll wait ’til everyone’s looking.
I do so love working on Christmas Day.
Makes the holidays really fly by, if you know what I mean….
The costume that Henry is wearing is exactly what he is going to make Rosetta wear in his coffin.
Where are you working, Wiserbud?
record music store
I made my clerk work this morning without any heat. Plus, fuck that little crippled kid of his.
Now, that’s some Dickensian shit.
:( Well, here’s to ya. I bet your bride will have a nice toddy waiting for you.
we’re heading out of town tomorrow morning to spend a couple of days with her family.
So already, as I’m sure you can imagine, I am simply ecstatic about that.
But, since I do the payroll here, I had to get it done before we left.
So, having to work on Christmas Day so I can be free to go spend 3 days with people, some of whom I hate with every single fiber of my being, just makes it all that much more special.
And the really sucky part is, there are actually some members of her family that I really enjoy spending time with.
None of them will be there.
That’s the spirit, Wiser!
//A Truly Hostage Christmas
I thought Henry was texting already in the first pic. Then Carin told me it is a remote.
You could develop a case of the flu.
Aggie was my Secret Santa, and she sent me cool soap that looks like rocks (Mini-me approves), a redneck wine glass (canning jar with a stem), a miniature Stonehenge (made me think of This Is Spinal Tap), and something else that I’m forgetting and I can’t go look because I’m at the in-laws’.
Speaking of in-laws’, my MIL stored a helluva lotta crap in this house. Also, beware peach-flavored moonshine.
yes, I will be drinking.
Ahhh, but not with everyone else. I have been told that I will be leading the children who play musical instruments in a concert for the rest of the family during the traditional cocktail hour.
Which means I have to spend a couple of hours the day before, while everyone else is enjoying the facilities, and rehearse with all the children of the people whom I really do not like..
This was not optional, btw. “Oh, you work in a music store? Then this should be fun for you!!!”
payroll is done.
catch up with y’all later.
thanks for letting me air a few of my grievances.
(and people wonder why I am such a Grinch around the holidays…..)
**pours Wiser a shot of moonshine**
Strictly for medicinal purposes, of course.
**taps empty glass on blog**
Well, I have a nice holiday fire going. Had to go outside and split the wood, shave some kindling, and carefully nurture the flames until it was going nice and hot.
*in other words, I lit the gas and rearranged the ceramic logs and fiber glass ashes until the overall effect was to my liking*
You gotta have a fire going for Christmas, if only for the dog..
It started snowing here!!!
(That’s a big deal in Dallas on Christmas Day.)
The snow is sticking!!!!! It’s actually cold enough that everthing is white.
**pours another round**
Merry Christmas to H2 and the Rosetta family!
Henry takes after his mom’s side, quite a bit. What a lil’ sweetie.
Time to go cook some more. Call me if you need bail money. Mwah!
Watching Emmett Otter. I love this show.
Merry Christmas, good people!
Henry is just great and the way Floyd is working that sweater, he is too!
That poor dog
We had too big a pile of cooked chicken in the fridge getting too old- you know, when it’s still okay to eat, but you’re just not excited about eating it anymore?
I boiled it up with some white rice, and added some cabbage chunks and old (but still good) carrots and extra 1/2 can of coconut milk from a truffle recipe that I didn’t use. And some marjoram from my plants out on the porch.
This made a large tupperware full. Dog has been eating that for breakfast every day for three days and tonight he just had it for dinner too.
It’s hilarious how joyous he gets. He goes outside and rolls around on his back like a happy little puppy.
Our doggehs are having just plain chicken and rice tonight. They love it.
Hell, I’m having chicken and rice tonight!
We walk the dogs at the golf course when it is closed. 4 holes today. MaryAnn was exhausted. She’s been asleep for 4 hours.
Pork chops for Xmas may not be too traditional, but they were pretty damn good.
Best of all, I’m not stuck cleaning up like I usually am.
The neighbors should be bringing Louie the Wonder Chihuahua around later this afternoon.
So I’ve saved some goooood scraps for him.
Doggehs eating scraps is why we are giving them chicky and rice. Cheese eating freaks.
Xmas at the in-laws done and my mom just cancelled on coming over. Jammie time!
Speed has Dumbest Stuff on Wheels marathon on. Skateboarders so deserve the pain they inflict on themselves and it is rather amusing too
Dr. Pol marathon. All is well.
Simple joys are the best.
Cyn calls vodka on the rocks a Jammie? Odd.
…or meth, it could mean meth.
Dude, it’s Christmas.
Vodka and cranberry juice.
Late lunch eaten and in-laws gone. I feel buzzy and gross from all the cookies I had.
I bet Rosetta was wearing a matching outfit when he took those Henry pictures.
Beasn, my cousins had a box of perfect, crunchy sfogliatelle from the bakery…a weakness of mine. I’m not beating myself up over having wheat and sweets over the holiday, but am definitely feeling it physically. Bleargh. Ook. Ow.
Meth-Infused Fruit Loop Vodka.
Tastin’ the Rainbows, bay-beee!
Ever had Kahlua on Cocoa Puffs?
You mean he wears clothes now? Big changes.
Too far south for snow, but not too far for 27 degrees with 30 mph winds. Gah!
Texas is like living on Mars, with bugs and snakes.
And multi gallon hats.
That stuff moves East. If it ‘s cold in Texas now, it’s going to be really cold for us soon.
Our bugs and snakes will be killed.
Rare picture of the Milky Way over Manhattan:
Stolen from Theo.
Yeah, this shit is headed straight for you, through Ohio and PA. The southern half of it threw off some tornadoes in LA (Lower Alabama). I don’t mind when it gets this cold every now and then but that fucking wind is a killer.
It is supposed to hit us Thursday. It was nice and 70’s here today
Goretex, You must own it.
Our pellet stove gets installed tomorrow.
Stuff changes tomorrow.
Did anybody pretend they liked the ugly sweater anybody else gave them today?
It never lasts long enough here for me to invest in real winter clothes. Extra layers and nut it out.
I will be wearing my Russki fur hat tomorrow though.
We don’t have that problem in the PNW. Around about October 15, the down, fleece, flannel, and wool come out for the next 5-6 months.
Scott, I hope they get the thing installed and ready to go before that storm hits!
Hotbride is crashed on the sofa.
Besides cooking the goose, my job is cleanup. She does all the rest.
Scott, I hope it’s the kind of stove you can put a soup kettle on all day. I used to do that at the cottage. Come home from being out all day and the place smells like Heaven.
Weiner dogs like going out to look at Christmas lights. They don’t like inflatable yard displays.
Quick question: I got a Roku today, and I’m wondering does anyone have any thoughts on which VOD subscription services are worthwhile? I get free previews of Hulu Plus, Netflix, and Amazon, and I’m wondering which if any are worth signing up for.
Sean, we enjoy Netflix a great deal.
Sean, if you have Amazon prime, you get many good movies for free. Netflix streaming has crappy choice and getting crappier by the day. Amazon will allow you to rent a movie for anywhere between 2 to 5 bucks depending on how new and in demand the movie is.
I think Amazon is becoming the instant version of blockbuster, and are going to eat Netflix’s lunch if they don’t shape up soon.
You ate the whole thing?
How much drippings did it render?
We’ve had a Roku for 2 years now and use both Netflix and Amazon instant prime. I’ve heard Hulu plus is decent but I haven’t priced it. I second Tushar’s comment on lousy Netflix movie selections…some are good but most of them plain suck. They have okay old TV series (Munsters, Addams Family, etc).
Our nearest petting zoo has a couple of farm geese, those white Embden geeze, some canadian geese, and a whole gaggle of sundry ducks and mallards. My kids have dubbed the larger farm goose ‘Daddy Duck’. When we are feeding them, Daddy Duck makes sure that he grabs every morsel, or bites the poor bird who managed to snag any morsel that he missed. Daddy Duck is the tyrant of the waterfowl society.
I am hanging on to Netflix because I am hoping to complete my home theater soon and will restart the Netflx DVD subscription. For the good movie experience, I don’t trust streaming.
Jimbro, how much does Roku cost? We are looking to ditch our cable when the subscription runs out in a few months.
What will you do for internet, DSL?
We can’t get cable here(sticks), so we are stuck with DSL from CenturyLink. It sucks ballz…
Mrs. O’Leary’s Cow Crust makes one helluva prime rib. the method is darn near foolproof. Cook it to temp (120) then wrap it in foil, and put it in a cooler. Go to candlelight service, refresh it by turning the grill up, then slice that little piece of heaven.
Perfect inside. Will be made many times, and with lesser cuts of meat! Once I get the corner bead smoke tray working it will be awesome.
Laura, provided you have high speed internet, good WiFi router and HDTV, Roku 2 XD at $80 is recommended.
If you have the TV near the router/modem, I recommend the $100 Roku 2 XS. The ethernet port will give you a better streaming rate than WiFi.
laura, the Roku itself is less than $100. You have to pay for the VOD subscriptions. It’s got a free one called Crackle that has a lot of stuff, plus you get content from news channels, VEVO, etc.
If you have a 720P HDTV, the $60 Roku HD will work too. Personally, I don’t see much difference between video quality for 720 and 1080.
I have the original Roku, got it at amazon for $60 on sale. Along with DSL it works prety well. My new BluRay player can stream Netflix and amazon but I haven’t tried that to compare yet.
This line in the “Mrs O’Learys Cow Crust” about the Chipotle Pepper cracked me up:
“Don’t be a sissy. This is 1/2 teaspoon for 10 pounds of meat, and it is all on the surface, not the interior. It is barely noticeable, like a viola. You don’t notice it, but take it out of the orchestra and something is missing.”
actually digital cable and pretty well
I got a super-duper Lawrence of Arabia box set last night at my in-laws. It’s really cool.
But it is Blu-Ray.
They a;sp gave ,me a copy of the John Adams mini-series and Ben-Hur.
Roku would never fly here. Most of what we watch are Big 12 sports on Fox Southwest, along with a few shows the Mrs. can’t live without on network TV (NCIS, some others I don’t know anything about). At least, not as an alternative to cable. I wish though, I watch about zero cable TV now.
Yeah, we have a dinosaur and will need a new TV for any of that stuff. Boo. Right when everything is about to suck.
I think we will be going without. Everything.
I watch about zero cable TV now.
Turner Classic Movies, BBC America, and in less than a month, JUSTIFIED.
The main things I watch on TV are local news and football. If it was just me I’d cancel cable TV and stick with internet for Roku/DVD/BluRay for movies.
ChrisP, I left it out. My relatives are complete sissies. My wife said we will be amping it up for our personal use.
But it’s delicious without cayenne. Absolutely delectable. The olive oil with herbs is the key.
You kids and your fancy digital TVs. I have an old CRT analog TV and I have absolutely no idea what the fuck you’re talking about. Seriously.
I have not kept up. What is all this Netflix/Hulu/roku/Amazon stuff?
We have minimal “DirecTv”
Are we missing something worthwhile?
To us, the MSM sucks.
What we watch is the LOCAL 9’oclock news, to see just who shot who and why.
Is there something worthwhile on that we would not have to pay a bunch of money for?
We are old, unemployed(now) and poor.
I’m serious in asking. I have no idea about the current digital offerings and how to access them.
When we built this house, I pulled Cat-5/6 all over. There are Ethernet outlets every 8′ fed off the 24-port switch in the wiring-closet, except in the bathrooms(a mistake).
There are a couple behind the TV Stereo rack. Does that help?
Where is the cow crust? I missed it.
It is VERY cool! Look here:
vmax, in this post:
Most of the TV I’m interested in I just stream from Amazon after broadcast date (Justified for example). I can’t be driven by a broadcast schedule. I’m busy man.
CrisP, what has changed is that you can now decide what to watch when, instead of the TV channel programmers deciding it for you. I would say try renting a couple of movies on Amazon, try a 1 month free Netflix subscription or watch something on Hulu. You don’t even need a TV. You can watch these all on a PC.
Jay, link for Mrs O’Learys Cow Crust, please, or put it up at the recipe site?
ChrisP, I had help with the goose. Drippings were enough to deep fry about a dozen parboiled (cut in half) potatoes, to a golden crispy brown. That was HotBride’s idea, and it was great.
Look here. It is very cool.
I tried to post this before, but it vanished! Magic!
Laura, as I said in the comment above, if you have broadband internet and a PC/Laptop, you can try all these out. Cut that cable now. That is just throwing away money. I have cable just because it is bundled with IP phone and Internet. It doesn’t cost me anything and I watch it 3-4 hours per year.
Chris, I’ve had 2 new TV’s in my adult life. The first one was a monster 26 ” old style TV that moved with me for 20 years till I got a flat screen TV a few years ago. As far as cable, we get a high speed connection because we’re near the main road and schools. My friend 4 miles away in the same town has DSL. As far as the Roku/Netflix/amazon I wouldn’t have it without a high speed connection.
Oh, and I am watching the movie Hugo for free on Amazon Prime as we speak.
**kicks slow router in poon**
Thanks Jay every time I go to amazing ribs I spend hours and hours there
Very strange happenings here.
Twice, I tried to post the O’Learys recipe.
Twice it vanished.
Is it/Them caught in some kind of spam filter?
I’m sayin’ WTF, O?
Oh I have been thinking about dropping my FIOS for months and just using them for internet and going the roku route as well
Freed from spam
That sounds great! Wish We were at your place for dinner!
If I was nearby, I would kiss you and, subtly, pinch your butt.
Hugs! And Merry Christmas!
Merry Merry to you and Anita too. ;-)
When Turner Classic Movies starts streaming, I’m there.
My mom got my a 1942 Scoutmaster Handbook.
It has some of the most politically incorrect pictures in it.
I love it.
Hope you all had a nice Christmas.
you all is a good pile of peoples.
Merry Christmas and God bless all you all.
Posted at the recipe site.
I must insist that everyone read that site, if you are going to grill. It’s awesome, with lots of great ideas.
I screwed up venison yesterday. I can’t figure out what I did wrong, unless it was just an old tough deer.
Merry Christmas to you and yours!
May you have a safe and happy new year!
I wonder if the Ducati will start…
It feels great to not post from a phone for once.
Low temps for a long time, roamy. Especially game. They have lots of connective tissue, since they get lots of exercise.
Jay, the “steaks” simmered for over an hour. I’ve cooked them this way before, I don’t know how many times, but this time FIL could barely chew it.
Also, I may need a substitute HHD if I can’t get a moment away from prying eyes or endless errands.
Probably was an old tough one. Sorry it didn’t go well. If the temp starts too high, everything just seizes up.
I have never liked venison all I have tasted is livery.
>>They have lots of connective tissue, since they get lots of exercise.
So what you are saying is that if I turn into a zombie, I should avoid noshing on Car in and Leon.
Just say the word and I’m on it, Roamy.
Sounds like a job for Cyn. If I did it, it would be like laura doing BBF, and you know how that went.
Car in and Leon will have to be cooked at 225, or less.
Good news is that they will turn out like brisket.
>>I have never liked venison all I have tasted is livery.
Why would you eat ornate ceremonial clothing?
Merry Christmas and a safe and happy New Year to you all, my imaginary internet friends…
And Wiserbud, too…
Bingo, Tushar; bingo.
Yes, please, Cyn.
you got me Tush
I meant iron metallic unpleasant taste not clothes. Spell check fail
The Salmon was perfect, and the shrimp was tasty.
Dinner was a success. Bread was perfect, the stuffing was aromatic, and we ate.
Thank you, ma’am.
Nice job BiW
I like shrimp better than prawns. However Prawns are large and tasty.
VMax, I couldn’t resist. Letting it slip would have angered the spirits of H2. We are here to pull each other’s legs constantly.
Take XBrad, for instance. I expressed some displeasure about the same blue butt header adorning H2 for a few says, and he took the opportunity to make an ass of himself and us. We have a cheeky new routine feature now, lamely called Tushy Tuesday or something. He even managed to weave my shortened name into it. What an ass!
No problem Tushar
I am out for the night
Leftover chicken paprikash for dinner.
I’ve had worse Xmas dinners.
Steak with garlic-butter-sauteed mushrooms in a Worchestershire rinse in a thickened beef bullion.
Cyn, how would you feel about adopting a 46 year old boy?
I’m mostly potty-trained, if that helps.
Red is on Showtime, now. in case you have nothing else to watch.
Tempting, Xbrad, except I already have one. And good for you on the potty training!!
HHD is in the can.
I watched Red last night.
and The Losers.
Hmmm, there’s a Bruce Willis flick I’ve missed. I’m slacking.
I think tonight’s entertainment is going to be some old episodes of BBC’s Sherlock.
And peeking through Cyn’s blinds.
Not too much entertainment tonight, I’m afraid; work day tomorrow.
I’m pretty excited. I got new underwear this year.
G’nighty, Xbrad and all the other lurkers and peeps out there.
Just about the time you start thinking your bros have outgrown their assholishness………
They’re singing Derp The Halls
But it’s not like Christmas at all
I remember when you were here
All the fun we had last year
Thank the lord all that is over.
sonsabitches it’s cold
I asked our zoning guy what the rules were for having chickens in this town. He is faxing them to my work. This should be funny.
Over the phone: must have at least 8000 square feet of property, chickens must live inside a fenced in enclosure, which must be at least 25 feet from other property lines…etc. So far, so good.
I’m sure of the rest of the items on this list, there are one or two that will disqualify us.
We are SO getting a wood stove. It would be cool if it actually had that feature, but I’m going for1)looks and 2 ability to heat the house first.
No roosters, and I’m sure a limit to number.
Having chickens is the new black.
Oh yeah- only up to five chickens per 20,000 square feet.
Time to go to work.
I don’t think we can cook on it. It’s going to look like this
I would prefer a pellet stove, but our rooms are too small.
Rich is in Tahoe. ass.
He put picture up on facedouche of the snow.
Ah. Back to work. I slept a total of 4 hours because I was too busy worrying about the shit I have to do before I leave for vacation.
I have a limit on horses and large animals, but it’s like 5 or 6. No limit I can find on smaller livestock.
*starts mouse farm*
*makes gourmet cat food*
o work. I slept a total of 4 hours because I was too busy worrying about the shit I have to do before I leave for vacation.
*checks MJ’s file.
I don’t see a request for leave …
Ahh the coffee is good
I was thinking of something like this — http://www.homedepot.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/ProductDisplay?storeId=10051&langId=-1&catalogId=10053&productId=100291302&R=100291302#.UNr577Yxr5I
No cooking. We need it to heat the livingroom side of the house, which costs a fortune in propane. And that’s keeping it not very warm anyway.
I wonder if this would be big enough, though?
We may get one for upstairs, and a smaller one for the basement.
I’m at work today. Which means one of you fine people better get me a HHP, STAT.
The firebox on the 2nd one is rather small Carin. It looks like it could only hold a few logs and require frequent tending
HHD, Gab, is just waiting to launch. I’m not sure of the scheduled time.
Yes, probably, v-man.
D isn’t even close to P. WHAT DID HE MEAN?
I’ll be at work shortly too. I have to go to the bank first, though, so I have a reason to leave later this morning. Might only do a 6 hour day, haven’t decided. 3 hours of PTO is better than 9.
Hunky Hump Pwednesday. The P is silent.
WINTER STORM WARNING!
SPECIAL SNOW ADVISORY!
I was so rude this morning, I have forgotten this storm’s name.
Cain, how well insulated is your house? We replaced windows and patio doors, and the door between the house and garage. Also, new insulation in attic. My energy bills got cut in half. And it does not fill chilly in the house anymore. Even the (above ground) basement has become livable. Ofcourse, my return on investment is not very impressive because I have piped natural gas and NG prices are very low lately.
Get this to find and plug leaks.
I’m at work today too.
I’m ok though, no hurry.
You may be able to get a good ROI because propane is expensive and not likely to come down in foreseeable future.
Gabe and Dave are here! Lets get drunk!
The house is pretty well insulated. Its new construction an my dad used the thickest you could get. We had people come in blow crap into the spaces, etc.
It cut it down, but the room is simply too big. Very high ceiling.
And propane is expensive.
The wood stove will be a bit more than the propane cost to heat that side of the house for 6-8 weeks. And we’ve got LOTS of wood.
*runs to get muddler
Go for the wood stove then.
These things have become very reasonably priced:
Good on ya, Dave. Working in an office just before and after Christmas is usually pretty good, because nobody is there and you can get stuff done. And leave early.
Did you see Obama is cutting his vacation short, to come back and save us from the fiscal cliff?
Gee, i wish I would have seen that one coming. Like the last 7 times he’s been on a vacation.
Plus, you save a vacation day for when you really want it — like a nice spring day that you just want to blow off.
I think Obama gets a boner just from riding around in Air Force One.
Car in check out craigslist. We can get wood stoves for next to nothing.
I’m sure he’ll be here for a day and a half, then fly back.
He’s such an asshole.
I will scott.I looked before, but there was mostly just POS at the time.
Craigslist requires a diligence which isn’t my forte.
I followed a link from Drudge to the Times of India after reading the article I clicked home..
On the front page half way down is a article “5 reasons why you should masturbate”
Those crazy dot Indians.
I wonder if he works, or watches tv on the flight?
If I were President, all I would do is ride around in Air Force One, and make brief appearances whenever we needed to land for fuel. I hear the food is good and the president’s cabin is real comfy.
Oh wait, I would also stay at Camp David, which is supposed to be pretty cool.
And I would buy back the Sequoia, the historic presidential yacht that fucking Jimmy Carter sold off as a PR gesture, so I could cruise the Potomac and serve fine California wines to my guests, like Nixon.
I would fire the entire White House staff and let the dust gather.
Of course he works MJ *Cough*
If he did not he would have to pay something for using AF1. I think it is a nickel.
Michael, I would trade the yacht in for a Contender and go fishing.
I am reconsidering the Contender as CIC I would be the boss of the Navy and we even have a Coast Guard I am sure they have something I could borrow.
Of course if O’Bumbles wanted to go fishing he would use an Nimitz class carrier and and troll from Marine 1 with an escort of a wing of F-18’s.
You guys should join Gab on HHD.
Why, is he falling apart?
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The Official Sports Team of The Hostages
Anyone who uses the term “fundamentally transform” in front of me better be a fast runner or armed.
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