3 in a Row, Bitches!!!

JAM sent me this link a few days ago and I thought it was hilarious

http://www.labiadoctor.com/labiaplasty.php

Especially the part where they offer specials. ‘Cause nothing says “professional medical care of the highest standards” more than “Ask about our group specials!!”

Now, I am the last person to suggest that someone might need to improve themselves through some kind of surgical procedure, but hey,

EXPERT LABIAPLASTY, LABIA REDUCTION SURGERY OF LABIA MINORA;
CLITORAL HOOD REDUCTION;
DESIGNER LASER VAGINOPLASTY (DLV);
REDUCTION OF LABIA MAJORA;
ENLARGEMENT OF LABIA MAJORA;
REDUCTION OF MONS PUBIS

HELL, Who wouldn’t benefit from that, amirite?

(imagine link to picture of Michael sucking on his special friend here)

Seriously, I would have linked pictures in this poat, but there’s not a single one that I could think of that would not have violated either WordPress or our own ToS.

So instead, here’s a video of a meerkat getting tickled.

Taking down the bird feeder

Got this in an e-mail. Have no idea where it began, so can’t give credit where it belongs.

I bought a bird feeder. I hung
It on my back porch and filled
It with seed. What a beauty of
A bird feeder it was, as I filled it
Lovingly with seed. Within a
Week we had hundreds of birds
Taking advantage of the
Continuous flow of free and
Easily accessible food.

But then the birds started
Building nests in the boards
Of the patio, above the table,
And next to the barbecue.

Continue reading

Decision time

Comic-Con Babes Babes Babes

Continue reading

Movie Review: Sucker Punch

Sometimes I exaggerate for humor effect but what follows contains no exaggeration.

Sucker Punch is the worst movie in the fucking history of human existence.

I’ve seen a thousand movies in my life.  I love movies.  Even bad movies, if they have any redeeming qualities at all, I’ll watch them to the end.

Sucker Punch sucks so many donkey dicks that I could only watch 40 minutes.  The only movie I ever saw in a theater that I walked out of was Tank Girl and that was 20 years ago.  Sucker Punch makes Tank Girl look like Citizen Kane.

Sucker Punch is like watching your retarded lock-in cousin play the worst video game ever.

I don’t normally have trouble coming up with ways to describe things but I have a hard time relaying to you how much this movie is a piece of maggot-infested piece of shit rotting corpse.

When I’m on my death bed, I’m going to look back and regret nothing except for these 40 minutes.

If I ever meet anyone involved with this movie, I will skin them alive.  I will gut the fucking dolly grip and feed his flailing carcass to feral pigs.

I had a great buzz on and this movie made me want to suck an exhaust pipe.

Seriously.  It’s the worst thing ever and anyone that disagrees with this, I hate your fucking guts too.

Worst fucking movie ever.  And I own it.

Continue reading

Big Boob Friday™

Hello.  Welcome to Big Boob Friday, nice person.

.

This song has a lifespan of maybe 12 listens and then it will be annoying.  The lyrics are pretty funny but the video is lame.  Four out of five dentists recommend that you crank it.

Continue reading

Dedicated to our Wonderful Leaders in Washington

For most of us, not spending more than we take in may be difficult, but we tend to try our best to avoid it, knowing what kind of trouble lay down that road.

However, for some strange reason, a group of people who get to develop their own special health insurance plans and lucrative retirement plans and even vote themselves raises whenever the mood strikes them, all without actually having to prove their worth in any substantial way to their employers (us), or even listen to them,  all while exempting themselves from the very same laws and regulations that they create and enforce on their employers (us), can’t seem to grasp the simple basics of financial management.  Imagine that!

So here’s a song dedicated to those Real Men (and Women) of Genius, our elected Representatives.

Funny stuff

funniest thing ever broadcast on television, other than a Contessa Brewer interview:

Tuesday Twofer

Hey, ya lazy bastages!

It’s time for a twofer. . .

and how about. . .

Oh by the way, the first song is a cover tune.

It is hotter than the gates of hell here today. Hope there are cool breezes where you reside.