Emergency BBF

For some reason, it seems no one is doing today’s BBF.  This is an OUTRAGE!

So here, here’s some music, you lazy fucks.

Here’s the boobs, you pathetic losers:

Marie Lambo, yet another Czechoslovakian beauty


nice, huh?

Here’s some history:

1381 – John Ball, a leader in the Peasants’ Revolt, is hanged, drawn and quartered in the presence of King Richard II of England.

1799 – The Rosetta Stone is found in the Egyptian village of Rosetta.

1870 – Reconstruction era of the United States: Georgia becomes the last of the former Confederate states to be readmitted to the Union.  There might have very good been a reason for that.

1955 – Eighteen Nobel laureates sign the Mainau Declaration against nuclear weaponsIdiots rejoice.

1979 – U.S. President Jimmy Carter gives his so-called “malaise” speech, where he characterizes the greatest threat to the country as “this crisis in the growing doubt about the meaning of our own lives and in the loss of a unity of purpose for our nation”. Wrong again, stupid.

1980 – A massive storm tears through western Wisconsin, causing US$160 million in damage.

Born today:

1606 – Rembrandt, Dutch painter
1893 – Dick Rauch, American football player and coach
1918 – Bertram N. Brockhouse, Canadian physicist, Nobel laureate
1940 – Ronald Gene Simmons, American mass-murderer
1946 – Linda Ronstadt, American singer
1950 – Arianna Huffington, Greek-born American newspaper columnist
1951 – Jesse Ventura, American professional wrestler and politician
1961 – Scott Ritter, American UN weapons inspector
1972 – Beth Ostrosky, American model

Here’s the only other SFW picture of today’s BBF beauty that I could find.  Enjoy.

328 Comments

  1. Fist

  2. If, say, my friend sent some other friend a box of chocolate truffles, only they were actually chocolate-covered lugnuts, would my friend be liable for any dental bills?

    Not if the label says “chocolate-covered lugnuts”. Then the broke-tooth person is just stupid.

  3. Not a bad last minute poat.

  4. 1381 – John Ball, a leader in the Peasants’ Revolt, is hanged, drawn and quartered in the presence of King Richard II of England.

  5. Next time I am up that way I will tear down his flyer and get you his number.

    If he is dumb enough to try and sell a $31,000 car by taping a flyer to a gas station window I am guessing you can probably beat him up on price.

  6. The BBF song is great. Nice work.

  7. 1979 – U.S. President Jimmy Carter gives his so-called “malaise” speech, where he characterizes the greatest threat to the country as “this crisis in the growing doubt about the meaning of our own lives and in the loss of a unity of purpose for our nation”. Wrong again, stupid.

  8. you can probably beat him up on price.

    Or tempt him with I can have $29000 wired into your account before 3 today, just sign this….

  9. 1980 – A massive storm tears through western Wisconsin, causing US$160 million in damage.

  10. the lingerie….

    the boobs….

    *the floor*

  11. Somebody cheer me up –

    I’m not gay, so boobs ain’t gonna do it……

  12. Not liking bewbs is a banning offense here.

  13. If Jewstin can appreciate BBF, so can you.

  14. Born today:

    1606 – Rembrandt, Dutch painter

    1893 – Dick Rauch, American football player and coach

    1918 – Bertram N. Brockhouse, Canadian physicist, Nobel laureate

    1940 – Ronald Gene Simmons, American mass-murderer

    1946 – Linda Ronstadt, American singer

    1950 – Arianna Huffington, Greek-born American newspaper columnist

    1951 – Jesse Ventura, American professional wrestler and politician

    1961 – Scott Ritter, American UN weapons inspector

    1972 – Beth Ostrosky, American model

  15. so boobs ain’t gonna do it……
    ————————————–
    Can someone please translate this for me? I don’t speak Nonsense.

  16. Can someone please translate this for me? I don’t speak Nonsense.

    – – – –

    I can’t help you MJ. I am completely boggled as to what she is trying to say…

  17. I think she’s saying this might help.

    http://is.gd/l9xQ4V

  18. Now THAT I understand!

  19. Hi guys. Can somebody kick whoever’s in charge of repaving my road for me? Kthnx.

  20. “Problem is we cut taxes without paying for them…” –Obama.

    Ok, that’s it. The next time someone calls this guy smart, I’m gonna kick ’em in the balls; girls included. The government pays for things by taking money from the private sector through taxation. Is he suggesting that we pay for tax cuts by increasing taxes? WTF?

    Decreasing spending in conjunction with decreased revenue (tax cuts) is called on off set. Its not payment.

    Fuck this guy and his 3rd grade economic brain.

    Fin.

    Oh, and time for an afternoon cocktail.

  21. Hey Revvy, if you ever have an art project that calls for the use of a bunch of busted up china let me know.

    This place http://www.polishstoneware.com/ saves the broken stuff and gives it away to artists.

  22. Can somebody kick whoever’s in charge of repaving my road for me?

    You point, I’ll kick.

  23. Veddy nice bewbs, wiserbuns.

    And I love the color of her toenail polish! Squeeeee!

  24. She has toes?

  25. She has toenails? They were custom done, cuz she can’t see em!

  26. … Scott, never do that to me. I have no idea when I’d ever need busted up china, but now I want some. LOOK WHAT YOU DID!

    (but seriously, thanks. I’ll keep it in mind)

  27. Your links did not suck either, wiser and wiserbud.

  28. People make jewelry out of it too.

  29. Texas probably owes the country an apology for Sheila JL, but hell, it’s Houston. Whaddya gonna do?

  30. The model seems nice.

  31. Sheila Jackson Lee only has a congressional seat because she’s black.

    Yeah, I said it. She knows it, too.

  32. Excellent links.

    I like the “idiots rejoice” link.

  33. Heh heh, thanks Scott, but I’m not particularly craft-oriented. The closest I get is pop-up books… and I still managed to accidentally stab myself in the leg with an X-acto knife and carve up my fingers when I did that. God knows what would happen trying to shape broken pottery.

    … actually wait, I don know what would happen. I took a glass cutting class once and sliced open my thumb. This is why I don’t even use actual paper if I can avoid it.

  34. “I am particularly sensitive to the fact that only this president — only this one, only this one — has received the kind of attacks and disagreement and inability to work, only this one,” said Jackson Lee from the House floor

    She truly is a stupid person.

  35. Here’s something you won’t hear about in the news today or anytime soon. My brother just texted me to tell me that his best friend’s partner was killed in Afghanistan today. He is a Blackwater operative and was gunned down at a checkpoint today… Prayers for that man, his family and all those that continue to take up arms against those savages.

  36. I liked that one too Mare, but I think that “Wrong again, stupid” was probably my favorite.

  37. Ugh, that’s awful news, GMLand. My cousin will be back in the states soon from that country.

  38. Oh damn, Guy.

    Godspeed his sweet soul.

  39. Prayers, GML. Those guys are solid citizens to a man, and all former service, as I’ve heard it. Shame to lose a veteran, no matter how, somehow worse when he’s still helping us in the field.

  40. Amen, GML!

  41. “Wrong again, stupid”

    Yes, that could be said to her over and over and over again.

  42. What’s the word I’m looking for that is more than “hate” to describe Sheila Jackson Lee? I can’t quite put my finger on it.

  43. Our BBF girl looks like she could use some grooming down there. I think I’m seeing stuff sticking out.

  44. Thanks guys. My brother is tore up over it because his best friend is distraught over the loss of his partner. I met the guy. Crying ass shame that those goat-fucking ragheads got to him. The only consolation is that the rest of the team evaporated those child raping fuckers right to hell immediately afterwards.

  45. What’s the word I’m looking for that is more than “hate” to describe Sheila Jackson Lee? I can’t quite put my finger on it.

    Omniloathe.

  46. Our BBF girl looks like she could use some grooming down there. I think I’m seeing stuff sticking out.

    I have a tiny pair of scissors. I can help.

  47. What’s the word I’m looking for that is more than “hate” to describe Sheila Jackson Lee? I can’t quite put my finger on it.

    Bob Beckel?

  48. “I met the guy. Crying ass shame that those goat-fucking ragheads got to him. The only consolation is that the rest of the team evaporated those child raping fuckers right to hell immediately afterwards.”

    Really sorry, GML. I agree with you, glad they’re in hell!

  49. Our BBF girl looks like she could use some grooming down there. I think I’m seeing stuff sticking out.

    OFB

  50. What I always find frustrating is the loss of good, brave men while we are paying (and making rich) assholes in politics.

    Then I go to Ace’s and see that a majority of military absentee ballots weren’t counted. And they’re the ones that should have their vote counted first!

  51. that’s truly horrible news, T2D.

  52. Bob Beckel?

    THAT’S IT!!!

  53. Wait, I don’t mean to sound like Sheila Jackson Lee but ARAFAT WON A NOBEL PEACE PRIZE?

    WTFF??????????

    I must have purposely forgotten that piece of bullshit.

  54. The brain sometimes blocks really bad memories, mare. It’s what keeps us sane, and what enables Democrats to run for reelection.

  55. I remember my Dad being furious when Carter officially recognized Arafat as a serious person of peaceful negotiating.

    “Why is that jackass negotiating with a terrorist?”

  56. Seriously, I don’t remember that…like Jay said, just as well.

  57. OFB

    eh???? Me no get it.

  58. I also recall my parents getting pissed about Arafat, and Carter’s recognition of him. Dark days.

    Like now, only it’s worse. My boys know far more about US and world politics at ages 10 and 13 than I ever did. You try to shield them a bit, but they pick it up.

  59. Well, he’s at least right about this and it makes me sick:

    Mitch McConnell dropped a bit of trivia we don’t think of very often — but it’s still all too true. That is, “We don’t vote on 60% of the budget.”

    Congress doesn’t have a say over nearly two-thirds of all spending — that’s entitlements and interest on the debts.

  60. Lipstick

    http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=ofb

    One of our own even entered it there. Heh.

  61. Lippy,

    Old Fashioned Bush

  62. Old fashioned bush

  63. They can vote on that 60%, note, he just says that they don’t.

  64. heh

  65. Right, Leon. That’s what makes me sick.

  66. I can never listen to them without remembering better times:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GXPqrdKNTRo&feature=related

  67. I’m already red-lining right now and having at it with a enviro-fag on my congressman’s facedick page about the EPA to boot. If this little piece of fag was anywhere near me right now I would go shock and awe on him in a heartbeat.

  68. Chew ’em and spit ’em out G’Land!

  69. I’m very attracted to GML right now.

  70. What’s his or her name, Guy?

  71. Dammit, I just checked. I missed being in Thad McC’s district by 5 miles. I’m still stuck with Dingellberry.

  72. Mare – behind the cafeteria in 20 minutes.

  73. “Mare – behind the cafeteria in 20 minutes.”

    Yessssssss!

  74. Mare! Don’t do it!!

    http://is.gd/WBivUF

  75. Your invited too, Cyn!

  76. Lips is looking too close at our bbf model. Nttawwt

  77. Gosh, GML – that’s terrible about that man in Afghanistan. Glad to hear they took out those bastards.

    Ya know what? There isn’t any way we are going to change the mindset of the people over there – they are tribal, they have always been tribal, and they will continue to BE tribal long after we are gone from this Earth.

    Screw ’em all – bring our boys home. The next time someone tries to attack Americans on American soil, we can just unleash Hell on them . The world would be a better place…..

  78. heh. Thanks for the info.

  79. Hello.

    http://tinyurl.com/6hk4uyr

  80. Wiserbud, check your ginormousbewbmail.

  81. Your invited too, Cyn!

    Sweeeeet!

  82. Pupster, I just LOL’d at that!!! HAHA!

  83. Fun with crafts! omg! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kz0XAi8TyUs#t=00m40s

  84. I am so signing up for spongelady’s newletter.

    And, I’m pissing off the rest of the work day. Cocktails anyone?

  85. Sponge lady has some excellent drugs.

    “WIGGLES”

  86. Oh and yes, Cyn.

    Surprise me.

  87. I think it would be extremely entertaining to be around Cyn and Mare when they’re all liquored up.

  88. Surprise:

    1 1/2 oz Absolut® Citron vodka
    3/4 oz Cointreau® orange liqueur
    1 oz cranberry juice

    These made me silly!

  89. What’s wrong with chicks having fur where God put it?

  90. Man, what a fucking week.

    Hello, ghetto bar.

  91. “I think it would be extremely entertaining to be around Cyn and Mare when they’re all liquored up.”

    Cyn and I would have a blast…..even if we didn’t remember it the next day.

  92. “What’s wrong with chicks having fur where God put it?”

    Beans, Rosetta once linked the scariest OFB on the planet and to this day it gives me shivers……..yikes.

  93. BARTENDER!!!

    A carafe of chardonnay for Hotspur please.

  94. Home now. I went to Detroit to work on the yard.

    /needs drink

  95. hahahaha…I meant beasn.

  96. Wendy, get your hot ass over here and do as Mare says.

  97. Mare, did you miss me today? I missed you.

  98. BARTENDER!!!

    A carafe of red for Carin please.

  99. Just think, 42 years ago Sponge lady was probably doing filthy things with total strangers at Woodstock. Whore.

  100. My back yard. OMG. HOrrible. I may go back tomorrow.

    We need to rent the place or something.

  101. Yes, I did, Carin.

    I’ve been thinking about pancakes all day. Also, hummingbirds are coming to my feeder but they are not drinking. I think my feeder is too high tech. It works on the vacuum system…..stupid feeder.

  102. Beans, Rosetta once linked the scariest OFB on the planet and to this day it gives me shivers……..yikes.

    That was very wrong of him to tweet his bush at us and pass it off as someone elses.

  103. Wild grape vines are the work of the devil

  104. “That was very wrong of him to tweet his bush at us and pass it off as someone elses.”

    HAHAHA…Yes, yes it was.

  105. I don’t use a feeder. I use hanging flowers (baskets) and I see them drink from them all the time. They also love my flower garden.

  106. Not only have I given up sugar in all obvious forms, I have given up wine to see if I can lose some fat around the middle. The sugar deal has been great but I’m not sure how long I can go without wine.

    IT ALL SUCKS!!!

  107. Could be that your nectar is getting too hot, Mare. I remember as a little girl that my mom had to move it during the summer months into the shade.

  108. Ah, maybe Cyn. It’s only in shade part of the day. I put it where I could view the birds as opposed to putting it in a sensible place for hummingbirds to feed.

  109. If it gets too hot it starts to ferment and it gets the little blighters crunk.

  110. Poor, poor mare.

    Yea, wine can get ya. I go down to drinking it twice a week. Or once. I can’t go cold turkey.

    Also, I try to compensate for the calories by eating a lot of salads, etc.

  111. Carin, I saw them at my hibiscus in the front yard and was hoping to lure them to the back (which I view more often) with a feeder.

  112. What got me Carin was a video I saw of Jillian Michaels discussing how alcohol is metabolized and it just screws fatty’s over.

    It’s a huffpo video with that lib twit Marlo Thomas so I won’t link it but it’s on youtube.

  113. Not only have I given up sugar in all obvious forms

    I’m seeing a string of words here that make no sense.

    *eats a handful of mini chocolate Teddy Grahams*

  114. Marlo Thomas should be slapped with a giant bag of dicks.

  115. What got me Carin was a video I saw of Jillian Michaels discussing how alcohol is metabolized and it just screws fatty’s over.

    Lala la I can’t hear you.

    Honestly, isn’t she the chick that won’t carry a child in her own womb because it will make her fat?

    I ain’t listening to her.

  116. Oh, look, J-Lo and her adulterizing husband are divorcing.

    Color me SHOCKED.

  117. “*eats a handful of mini chocolate Teddy Grahams*”

    a) shoots beasn in the face with a carrot and humus cannon

    b) totally agrees with Hotspurs suggestion of bag…dicks…Thomas’s face

  118. And they appeared to be so much in love.

    /barfs

  119. Carin, I said it screws “fatty’s over.” You don’t have to worry.

    She may need to be hit in the face with a bag of dicks too based on her stupid comments but I’m not sure she isn’t right about wine and my belly fat.

  120. Because someone asked why my technical skilz suck the other night.

    Oh, and I sent my very first Tweet last night. My “handle” is Teresa_Koch – if you’re interested.

  121. If I ever get fat I’ll just buy a corset.

    Actually, that’s a fib. I’ll just buy another 12 pack and stop looking at the mirror.

  122. I’m telling you. Just come visit me. I’ll put you one “my plan” with my hubby.

    My husband’s lost 40 pounds since the accident. St Paddy’s day. He says that day changed his life.

  123. /barfs

    /pukes

  124. My “handle” is Teresa_Koch – if you’re interested.

    Teresa, you do understand that we must, absolutely must, as Hostages say, “no, no we’re not interested.”

  125. I hope it changed in a good way Carin (silver-lining thing); I’d hate to think that he’s still hurting.

  126. /barfs

    /pukes

    Atta-girl. You’ll get down to fighting weight in no time!

  127. Just drink more coffee Mare.

    Caffeine is an appetite suppressant and if you drink a couple pots a day your sitting pulse will be about 130 bpm.

    Win win!

    I can’t gain weight no matter what I eat.

  128. Oh and no radishes.

  129. Oh, No, Cyn. In a good way. He prioritized, etc. Stuff like that. He still has pain and numbness. But that’s not gonna bring him down.

    He’s been on my diet and doing my p90x and running etc.

  130. So how many pots per day was that, Scott? I’m in.

  131. Caffeine is an appetite suppressant and if you drink a couple pots a day your sitting pulse will be about 130 bpm.

    She could also start smoking. I hear that helps.

    Better yet – start smoking CRACK.

  132. Coffee gives you bad breath. No wanty.

  133. Scott, do you have a newsletter?

    Scott plus Sponge lady…win/win

  134. The Three Food Groups:

    Caffeine
    Nicotine
    Saccharine

  135. or meth…..

  136. I want to see the Beckham’s new baby. I bet it’s a pixie posh.

  137. There is no question I’m working out enough…intensity, length etc.
    (SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTHS). I’m now focusing on really fine tuning what I eat and what will work for me.

    Worst wagon fall in three weeks? I did have a piece of pizza yesterday…..thin crust, veggie. Got to watch that.

  138. Mare, how much belly fat do you have? I bet you’re lying.

    Can’t have any more than I do. And if anyone here says anything about it, I blame Mr. Beasn and my fat-headed kids.

  139. I have hot coffee at my fingertips from 6:30 AM until about 5:00 PM.

    On average about 3 quarts a day.

  140. I can’t gain weight no matter what I eat.

    I have the same problem. Are we related?

  141. Cyn artificial sweeteners make you fat.

    I can find the science behind it if you missed it.

    Sugar is best.

  142. Scott, that is really funny to read next to your avatar.

  143. sugar and bacon

  144. Mare, it sounds like you’re eating stuff with calories but not cancelling them.

    You have to have something like a diet soda and a Snickers, or unsweet tea with a Big Mac combo.

  145. Cyn artificial sweeteners make you fat.

    I was mostly going for the rhyming effect, Scott, but you are right. Real sugar and real butter used exclusively in my house. Except little packets of Stevia for my cereal, but that’s real sugar too.

  146. The Ozark branch of Pupster’s family tree:

    http://tinyurl.com/6kfbtj5

  147. I am 6’2, well I used to be, and once tried like hell to break the 200 lb barrier. At the time I worked at a place that was serviced by a friends coffee truck. He charged me $3.00 no matter what I took. I pigged out for breakfast and lunch, then pigged out for dinner and drank beer until I went to bed.

    I never got past 198 and it really pissed me off.

  148. The Ozark branch of Pupster’s family tree:

    Awwww

  149. I’m 6-2 also. I got up to 205 a few years ago, but now I’m back down to 193.

    HotBride says I’m losing my ass.

  150. I would like to receive Jewstin’s newsletter also.

  151. Don’t be so mean to the Pupster!

    Here you go boy…enjoy your treat!

  152. Heh. I have never had an ass.

    I am assless.

    If I put on assless chaps I think I would go back in time.

  153. I tried to gain 20 pounds a few years ago. I ate five meals a day plus snacks and nearly broke the bank buying groceries. In six months I gained a whopping 4 pounds.

  154. Size 6-8 most of my life (until about 5 years ago). Right now, size 12.

    Have gotten into some 10’s recently. I think from the no sugar deal.

    I miss my old body. Don’t recognize the one I have although I am still quite muscular….just have fat over it . Getting there. getting there. I will never give up!

  155. Going an a long bike ride on some trails with mr. mare.

    bbl

  156. MARE!! Look at this. NOW.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=lcxL1-OH2hI

  157. Damn. The whore. I missed her.

    I gave up dairy and stay right below 130. If I give up the sugar and the low salt Lays, I’d prolly lose another 5-10.

  158. I think that may be the bestest BBF model ever!

    (Maybe it’s just because Cathy is out of town.)

    *looks at watch, glances towards unoccupied kitchen*

    Hey, who’s going to make me dinner?

  159. Open the toaster oven Michael.

    Shake contents onto a paper plate.

    Add salad dressing or mustard.

    fin

  160. Hey, who’s going to make me dinner?

    I might be able to help. I have a box of Altoids, a slightly used piece of chewing gum, and something that is either an e tablet or an aspirin.

  161. Cathy is on a cruise? Awesome!

  162. Spirit Grille!

    Speaking of having no ass, my $12 jeggings from Wal Mart have arrived. They’re still saggy in the butt. 😦

  163. Michael – I have an answer for you: Fried SPAM sandwich.

  164. Hey, who’s going to make me dinner?

    I think you can pretty safely skip a meal there, slim.

    http://tinyurl.com/643ahfz

  165. Cruise? *ears perk up*

    I think I’ve found our next one. It goes through the Suez Canal and hits some ports in Syria. Bad idea?

  166. my $12 jeggings from Wal Mart have arrived. They’re still saggy in the butt.

    Stuff a rolled up sock in there.

  167. Come to CT Lipstick, we can shoot at you and save you thousands.

  168. Syria?

    http://tinyurl.com/5w8x2dd

  169. I’ve been to Egypt 3 times. If you want the experience, take a rug and a hookah down to your local dump and sit in the filth for a few days.

  170. Chief, I spent 5 weeks there and my digestive system has never been the same. Stupid $2 a day plan…

  171. Stuff a rolled up sock in there.

    Speaks the voice of experience…

  172. Where you going, Ted?

    http://tinyurl.com/5uxymfw

  173. I spent 5 weeks there and my digestive system has never been the same.

    Lips, I did the same thing in Morocco and survived for a month on a steady diet of slightly rancid meat on a stick, boiled mystery meat, and flies and meat in pita bread.

    The best meal I ever had was a slice of pizza I got in Newark airport when I got back home.

  174. May the farce be with you. . . loser!

  175. Morocco, in my experience, was not as bad as Egypt. YMMV.

  176. Damn mosquitoes are chewing me a new arsehole.

  177. FWIW, we crossed over to Morocco from Spain and had a great time in Tangiers.

  178. mcpo got laid in Morocco.

  179. Jew, we are simpatico. *gurgle* BRB

  180. mcpo got laid hashish in Morocco.

    FTFY

  181. Morocco: http://fwd4.me/06l5

  182. Looks like the nice neighborhood.

  183. Did anybody tie anybody else to the railroad tracks today?

  184. Cyn?

    http://tinyurl.com/25sqodh

  185. I am worried. Where is Cathy?

  186. Well since June 1 we’ve had 31 days of 100+ temps, and nothing but 100 since June 22. It hasn’t rained much since Feb.

    This is a bad time to be throwin butts out the window.

    Oddly, there’s a couple of thunderheads just popped up east of here, I think they’re gonna miss us, but still the wind and the drop down to 92 or so feel great right now.

    So I took off all my clothes.

  187. Batman said she was on a cruise –

  188. So I took off all my clothes.

    I’ll alert the media.

  189. So I took off all my clothes.

    Heh. Something that drives me nuts in Texas is that shirts and shoes are optional. Every time I go into a store somebody will be in there with one or both missing and nobody bats a fucking eye.

  190. Heh. I went to buy a pack of smokes a while back, and some dude had driven to 7-11 but hadn’t bothered to put on shoes. Buncha savages in this town.

  191. Weather bla bla TX vs FL bla bla. Lack of clothing bla Bikinis WIN!!!!!!
    I love living in Florida chicks wear bikinis 9 or 10 months of the year!

  192. Cyn? Roamy?

    http://tinyurl.com/25sqodh

    FIFM

  193. Hi Roamy
    How you been?

  194. I can’t remember the last time I had a cup of coffee. Makes me jittery.

  195. Sean. Decaf.

  196. Roamy, I made this especially for you:

    http://tinyurl.com/25bw9x7

    *starts counting brownie points.

  197. I can’t remember the last time I had a cup of coffee.

    Good lord, man. Were you raised by wolves?

  198. **brownie point machine sputters, tilts.

    That’s awesome, Jewstin.

  199. My Boss says I smell like Vodka in the morning.
    I drink 3 cups of coffee. Hey I thought Vodka didn’t smell?
    Maybe I should start smoking.

  200. Vmax, I finished the first week of experiment de-integration. I was told to go home at 10:00, but I did this and that, went to lunch with the other investigators, came back, did some more until they ganged up on me, and I went home at 1:00. Took an epic nap. I was told not to come in tomorrow, that other people are covering for me.

  201. When I was aboard ship, I drank coffee from 0530 until 0100.

  202. Vmax – Tell him it’s cleaning fluid and you’ll have a talk with your dry cleaner. . .

  203. Vmax, if you switch to gin, your boss will never be able to say you smell like vodka.

  204. Good for you Roamy. Monday is good. You can break stuff Monday to your hearts content.

    Can you employ me as a subcontractor? I need to break a few things for …. stress relief. Yes Stress!

  205. The other thing is, it upsets my stomach, so decaf wouldn’t really help.

  206. Wow.. I got a tick.

    *holds the Marlboro steady.. got to kill it slow so it pulls the head out and..

    AIYEEEEEEEEEE!!!

  207. I am worried. Where is Cathy?

    She went to Colorado. Said she wanted to see the mountains and “think things over.”

    I don’t understand women, but it makes me nervous when they start thinking.

  208. Jewston you rock! Your logic is impeccable. I will drink a different drink every night!
    That will fool him!

  209. MOM!!!! DAVEIT HAS LYME DISEASE!

  210. If I need perking up in the morning, there’s always Irish Breakfast Tea.

    With that, it’s time for Jeopardy. Later, sk8ers.

  211. Dave, my pool is one big fucking hot tub. Seriously. In the late afternoon, it’s within 5° of the temp I use for the spa in the winter. This weather is ridiculous, even for Texas.

  212. Eels!
    Oops sorry Nat Geo is on.

  213. Michael – Is your pool area screened in?

  214. >> Oops sorry Nat Geo is on.

    Did you see Snipers, Inc. earlier? It was about Barrett Firearms. Very good.

  215. Smooth, Michael…

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=he2a4xK8ctk&feature=player_embedded

  216. I did Andy.
    Good stuff. 1.3 mile kill with the Barret.

  217. Michael – Is your pool area screened in?

    Yeah, between the cedar fence and the bushes, my pool is very private. I never wear a swimsuit unless we have company. Nobody has a line of sight to the pool surface. Getting in or out, you need to glance at the redtip bushes near the covered patio just to make sure somebody is not walking a dog along the Lone Star Gas utility easement behind my lot.

  218. >> Dave, my pool is one big fucking hot tub.

    Yeah, I know. I’m probably only a few degrees behind you on water temp, cause I have more shade around it, but damn, it normally doesn’t get to 85 until mid August.

    Well it is what it is. A breeze still makes it work. Plus I’m nekkid.

  219. Do you think if I were to tweet cool cars That would be a viable twitter? Could I make $ on it?

  220. Vmax, I finished the first week of experiment de-integration.

    I don’t even know what that means. Is Romy smart or something?

    Who knew about this? Why was I not informed? Maybe I should have talked to her instead of just staring at her hooters.

  221. The Green Hornet Movie Smoke Break.

    Love the pause button on digital movies.

  222. The coffee bitch sign is a keeper! Thanks Xbrad

  223. Michael – Lots of Floridians screen in the pool. Not only does it cut down on the bugs, the dark, fine screens cut down on the water temp.

  224. I don’t even know what that means. Is Romy smart or something?

    Hahahahahahahaha.

    Seriously, there’s supposed to be a press release soon, and I’ll share it here.

  225. The dark screens sound like a great idea for the pool area. They work like a champ on my windows. For the pool, we’d have to let our aerator run all night to keep the temps down.

  226. MCPO how’s about a little xbox tomorrow night?

  227. 85°? That’s frickin’ icewater.

    You’re right about the shade — my pool is getting burned by the sun all afternoon. It’s 94° right now.

    Oddly, it still cools you off. You just need to jump in more often. And being nekkid helps too.

  228. hence the nekkididity.

  229. Not only does it cut down on the bugs . . .

    Mosquitoes are not permitted in my yard, Chief. The Jackson’s Mosquito Control System makes my yard a death trap for mosquitoes.

  230. As a long time Floridian I can attest to the fact that a screened in pool also discourages alligators, water moccasins, walking catfish, and muscovy ducks from getting in the water.

  231. My parents’ pool is shielded by 8 foot tall rhododendrons and 8 acres of land. You can stand on the diving board naked and no neighbors can see you.

  232. *Gets out telescope to look at neeked lips*

    Brew is right, but I thought he was in the frozen north?

  233. >> You can stand on the diving board naked and no neighbors can see you

    Unless I’m in the rhododendrons.

    Which I’m totally not, by the way. Carry on.

  234. vmax, I live up north now but except for the Army and college I lived in Florida from ’67 to ’97.

  235. The dark screens sound like a great idea for the pool area.

    Except they’re going to be ugly. Pools around here are mostly intended to be big yard ornaments. We’re trying to get away from flamingos and gnomes.

    For the pool, we’d have to let our aerator run all night to keep the temps down.

    That will lower your ph, meaning you’re going to be buying sodium bicarbonate at the pool supply store. Did I mention that I am a full-time professional pool boy now?

  236. Brewfan – Going to see the new Harry Potter with my girlfriend tomorrow evening. . .

  237. Other than Lippy, none of you people who have commented on this matter have any business being nude outdoors, screened or not.

    FOR SHAME!!!

  238. Chief has a girlfriend?

    *note to self — dump internet porn stocks NOW*

  239. *does a “helicopter”

  240. *does a “helicopter” that slaps water out of the pool*

  241. Michael – She was my girlfriend when I married her 28 years ago.

  242. Oh yeah, nobody noticed “the slaps water out of the pool”

    Good cover.

  243. Mosquitos?

    Oh yeah…I remember those.

    We don’t see them much in these parts.

  244. Trouble brewing:

    http://icanhascheezburger.com/2011/04/29/funny-pictures-evry-bunny-was/

  245. We’re going to to see HP Sunday morning, in the hopes that it won’t be crazee stupid crowded.

  246. Just remember, Chief, you are still on probation.

  247. Mosquitoes in Michigan will pick up a small child and carry them off.

  248. Michael – Yes, I know.

  249. Which is another reason why I don’t live in Mitcheegaan.

  250. The mosquito is the state bird of Louisiana.

  251. Well…if no one is here, I’m gonna go for a swim in Dave’s pool and Michael’s pool.

  252. Well…if no one is here, I’m gonna go for a swim in Dave’s pool and Michael’s pool.

    Make sure you pee in Dave’s pool first.

  253. Okay, which one of you degenerates farted and ran off all teh wimmens?

  254. *Hopes it wasn’t Lips.*

  255. I did NOT fart. Don’t know why, but I haven’t lately.

  256. It’s rather disturbing.

  257. I agree. Not farting would be disturbing. It could lead to punctures and blowouts at inopportune times.

  258. Please disregard any typos and spelling errors. Thanks to this POS comment thingee, I cannot see what I’m typing.

  259. Okay, which one of you degenerates farted and ran off all teh wimmens?

    I dunno that it was so much farting as weirdos talking about how they like to lounge around in the buff.

  260. Okay, so maybe reminding everyone about Dave and Bruce lounging around, clogging up their pool filters with stray pubes was the problem.

  261. My bad.

  262. Mare meets Rosetta

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rzICOyiy-Xk&feature=player_embedded

  263. wakey wakey

  264. Good mornig, Carin. The Open awaits. Later.

  265. Mare meets Rosetta

    I don’t buy it. They should have exchanged fashion tips at the end.

  266. Nobody click on this except C arin…

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rZDGRKFH66s

  267. He wasn’t as good alone, but I still liked his stuff for a while.

  268. Big plans for today……Big Plans! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ERLlBS-hf1s&feature=player_embedded

  269. I have never known what kind of business scott and laura are the proprietors of, but no.

    Just, no.

  270. HA! Beasn that Maru link was great. That cat is hilarious.

  271. As per Scott’s vid of me meeting Rosetta:

    “I am 50 and you are not 50!!!

  272. Gross. Is she the most hookerish 16 year old you’ve ever seen? Are her parents pimps? Look at her hair, make-up, clothing. This has to be a fake stunt:

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2015171/Green-Mile-star-Doug-Hutchison-defends-marriage-16-year-old.html

  273. You be quiet, now!

  274. She’s 16? Really?

  275. My impression, Mare, is that LA people are a breed apart.

    In a few years she’s going to realize she peddled her ass off too early and for cheap.

  276. I saw that a bit ago. I don’t believe she’s 16.

  277. I knew some girls at 16 that had developed like that.

  278. She may not be 16 any more….let’s say she’s 19, she still looks 35 and like she’s been around several blocks.

  279. Somewhere, in this house, is a wristwatch with an 830AM alarm.

    I have no idea where.

  280. I don’t believe the guy is straight.

    Plus, this sums it up: “The couple are reportedly looking to feature in their own reality show and plan on starting a family at some point in the near future.”

  281. Leon, it’s not that she’s “developed” I’ve seen lots of girls that have large boobs at 16, it’s how she’s packaged. And believe me, she’s been packaged.

    *and who knows, with her parents those boobs could be fake.

  282. I blame early smoking and hormones in meat.

  283. Yeah, MJ his face looks like it’s been “lifted.” Having a reality show with those two is really crossing the pervy line.

  284. But she was married to a 50 year old when she was 16.

    No matter what that’s sick.

  285. She might get his whole estate before she hits 30.

    Sick like a fox, perhaps.

  286. It’s her face and everything.

    She looks like she’s been ridden hard and put away wet.

  287. And LA people are a breed apart.

  288. Who the heck would be interested in watching a reality show about them.?

    Wait, let me fix that;

    Who the heck would be interested in watching a reality show about them?

  289. And LA people are a breed apart.

    I’m guessing too much inbreeding.

  290. If we got rid of our TV I would barely notice except for news. And even most of that is crap I could live without.

  291. I would notice. Last night we watched something I recorded a year ago- Radiohead performing their album “In Rainbows”. Marvelous.

    Not much has been on tv since then, but I do watch news stuff – 6 pm news on Fox … chris Wallace on Sunday morning.

  292. Scott took the store off me today. 1) One more cuppa, and then 2) make list and then 3) execute items on list OR 3) go back to bed.

  293. I’m watching less and less TV, but I’m addicted to the background noise.

  294. Lauraw, I’m thinking about gearing up to get off my ass.

    I haven’t yet made that executive decision though.

  295. Girl, I’m stalling on writing a LIST.

    So, yeah.

    I was telling Scott yesterday how when the weather is this gorgeous for so long, the work ethic just erodes a little more, each passing day.

  296. Oh, it’s on as background noise. Or something is on. A kid playing a video game, or watching spongbob. Something. My older kids like some irritating joke show.

    /thinks back fondly to when summertime meant there was absolutely NOTHING on tv. NADA.

  297. I should make a plan for the day.

    1) Finish coffee
    2) Go to old house, get mail
    3) Shop for groceries
    4) Sunbathe to make vitamin D and get some healthy color
    5) Eat
    6) Head to Monroe

  298. What’s in monroe?

    I mean, besides the River Raisin?

  299. My friend with the awesome basement hosts one of the games I’m in, he’s in Monroe. Reminds me, I need to find out when their county fair is so I can shop the 4H grounds.

  300. Tell me that this doesn’t look awesome.

  301. I was smart last week and made a bunch of meals so all I had to do when I got home was nuke dinner. I should do that again for Week 2, but dayum, I’m tired.

  302. *bark bark bark*

    http://tinyurl.com/6jwh6ts

    I can’t remember the last time somebody was awake before me and fixed me breakfast. I even slept in 4 hours this morning and was still the first one up.

  303. I used to really enjoy the Michigan state fair. The farm animal stuff was awesome. So much to see. They had a birthing tent where stuff was always being born. It was really cool.

  304. If the Mrs isn’t working, I’m first up. Sans alarm, she’ll sleep for 15 hours if not disturbed, mostly to make up for the work days.

  305. Ooooh, Romy, that reminds me. I have a bunch of chicken I could put in the crockpot and make a big pile of burritos out of. Scott loves those, so easy for him to take one from the freezer and nuke it.

    Plus, I can hide vegetables and bran and stuff in there.

    OK, so there’s a plan. Will do chicken today and then do beef tomorrow with a cheap roast.

  306. If they had the fair in the spring, they could have a copulation tent.

  307. Does Scott like eggs, Lauraw? I like to scamble up a mess of eggs with sausage and cheese and make breakfast burritos. Salsa on the side. I don’t know if they would freeze very well.

  308. I went to the Cass County fair every Summer as a kid. This will be the first time I’ve gone to the 4H bit with any intention other than sightseeing. Hoping to find some contacts to get started with rabbits and chickens. I’m not sure we’ll have enough spare time between us until the wife is able to quit working, and that can’t happen until the house sells.

  309. I love state fairs. Washington has a very good state fair. Scones, cows, mink oil soap……ahhhhhhhhh

  310. Scambled eggs give account information to Nigerian Princes to assist with their cash liquidity issues.

  311. Bran?

    * Puts burritos on list *

  312. Yep, I think Scott would like that a lot, Pups.

    Do you have any other projects you’d like to give me today?

  313. I’m visiting my Mom next week for a couple of weeks….making burritos ahead of time is a really good idea. I’ll do it without a crock pot and just slow cook in a soup pot. What spices are you using?

    Shoot, got to go workout……

  314. MARE!

    http://tinyurl.com/26ldwq6

  315. I don’t have the tex-mex knowledge base, Mare, so I just use the pre-made mixes in the spice aisle. Either taco seasoning or whatever strikes my eye.
    I do usually add extra cumin and black pepper though, because I like that.

  316. I’m sending that to my girls, Pupster (and also bookmarking it for those moments of murderous rage).

  317. New poat!

  318. Gotcha, Laura. Cumin I’ve got and this and that.

  319. Do you have any other projects you’d like to give me today?

    No, no…not really.

    *looks away into middle distance*

    *glances back to see if Lauraw is still glaring*

    *clears throat*

    But, you know, if you are around…outside…later…maybe you could occasinally…uhm, if you have time, give me a little push?

    http://tinyurl.com/6fdrz8z

  320. […] H2 has Big Boob Friday. And some Rule 5 for the […]

  321. […] H2: Emergency BBF […]


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