No Mail Today – It’s a Federal Holiday…..
BrewFan bought some new Cooper tires for his truck, but was upset when the Hostages told him that Cooper tires go soft and don’t last very long. What a coincidence – BrewFan’s dates say the same thing about him…. (Happy now, Brew? You got mentioned in a Summary post!)
Peej’s refrigerator went out, but it’s OK, because her brother is gonna let her have his while he’s deployed in Afghanistan. And Dave’s gonna let Peej make him a sammich when she stays with him while visiting her brother at Fort Hood, so she’s got that going for her, too.
Clintbird asked a lot of questions, but nobody answered him.
In the wee hours of the morning, Roamy, Sean, and ArmedGeek got their nerd on. Then Roamy and Sean went to bed, leaving ArmedGeek to play with himself. He got really mad when Michael interrupted him.
Oops – Sox revealed our secret: the Wimmen Folk put Beer, Liquor, and Sammiches on the window sill for the stalkers (Dave in Texas sometimes puts pie out). Bad Sox! Don’t you know the first rule of Hostagette Hobo-Trapping Club is that you never talk about Hostagette Hobo-Trapping Club? No cream for you…..
Mare did a most delicious skewering of Little Paulie Krugman (douche extraordinaire). Trust me, you DON’T want to get on Mare’s bad side….
Jazz and the Chief tried to out-PerryComo each other with YouTube links from the 1970s. Not sure who “won” that contest, but the members of the Hostage Nation were the ultimate losers….
VMax reminded us that Davy Crockett was more than just a guy in a cool coonskin hat: “We have the right as individuals, to give away as much of our own money as we please in charity; but as members of Congress we have no right to appropriate a dollar of the public money.”
Herr revealed his secret philanthropy – he ”spreads his wealth” among poor, unfortunate strippers. Isn’t that sweet? Maybe if he gives those nice young ladies enough money they can afford to buy more than just underwear…..
Andy had to save Jazz from himself when he admitted he doesn’t look at JUST politics and porn. Sounds like it’s time for a Hostage intervention, gentlemen!
UncleFacts had to work today, but he still had time to “suppeth” with us. He also likes to use the “Shift” button a lot. But he makes up for it by hurling insults at Justin Bieber when necessary.
T2D tried to defend the young poppet Bieber, but even he couldn’t get through it with a straight face.
J’Ames got the good phone for once. And he thinks that Biebster likes the ladies. Hahahahaha – good one, J’Ames!…..
TiFW used the words “it’s”, “its”, “quite” and “quiet” correctly – all in the same sentence (“It’s quite powerful in its quiet simplicity.” ). Guess Rebecca’s not the only “special” one in that family….
PattyAnn wanted “More”. Andy obliged her.
Cathy had left-over bacon and she didn’t share.
Chief needs a warning before clicking on some of the links around here. Either that, or it’s time to invest in some Depends. His mother’s picture is starting to look really shi–…..umm……ahhh……never mind…..not gonna go there….
Mrs. Jakeman has “plans” for Jakeman. Nefarious plans which involve a trip to Home Depot for “tools” that will ”scrape, caulk, and prime”. My God, man – get out while there’s still time!
Pendejo told the tale of being drunk in public. Clintbird added his tale of being drunk in the Opryland Hotel. In both cases, they took the wrong turn. They also lost their way, but that’s a story for another day.
Hotspur’s boss didn’t give him the day off, that racist. Quick – someone call Al and Jesse! This injustice must not be allowed to stand! What’s that? Self-employed you say? Never mind….
The last poat died a slow, painful death, so this one is going up earlier than normal.
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