Heartbreaking.

For those of you who refuse to recognize the evil that resides in the hearts of all Americans, I present to you this truly heart-rending photograph:

The chair? THE CHAIR??!? WHY, ALLAH??!? WHYYYY?!!?!?

That’s right.  This is what happens when innocent, peace-loving Muslims in Corvallis, OR provide support and comfort for one of their own who simply wanted to show the world what a good peaceful Muslim he is.  Someone sets their office on fire.  (Not the actual place of worship or any symbol of the Religion of Peace, you will notice, but the business office, where all of their documents were stored.  Documents that, perhaps, would have included financial data, membership lists and other information that may have been helpful in the investigation into the support and assistance that the failed Portland Christmas Tree Lighting Ceremony bomber might have received from this mosque center.  What unfortunate timing for the FBI, don’t you think?)

Can you feel the pain that this poor man is experiencing over the loss of the chair?    Can you imagine his tears of anguish and suffering over the destruction of all of the mosque’s center’s filing cabinets?  (You’ll have to settle for imagining them, as the AP photographer, whom I’m absolutely positive did NOT stage this photograph, was unable to get a shot of the man’s face.)   Just look at the incredible amount of destruction that has been wrought, easily resulting in hundreds of dollars worth of damage.

Of course, this horrendous attack on the offices of the mosque center was obviously done in response to the recent attempted mass murder/terror attack at the tree lighting ceremony.  Just ask the AP writers!

Anger over a Somali-born teen’s failed plan to blow up a van of explosives during Portland’s Christmas tree lighting ceremony apparently erupted in arson when a fire damaged the Islamic center once frequented by the suspect.  Police do not know who started the blaze or why, but believe the mosque was targeted because Mohamed Osman Mohamud, 19, occasionally worshipped there.

Please note the interchangeable use of “center” and “mosque” in the above quote.  Weren’t we told that the Ground Zero Mosque was not going to be a mosque, but a “center?”  Is there a difference?

Anyway, the people of Portland have instantly leapt to their feet and are finally speaking out against the true source of the evil that has, once again, shown it’s ugly face.

Dozens of people — many of them women wearing head scarves — arrived at the federal court building where Mohamud was scheduled for a court hearing. One of them, Mujahid El-Naser, said he attended middle school in Portland with Mohamud and that he didn’t believe his friend would have gotten involved in the plot without encouragement of the FBI.

That’s right, the FBI is to blame for this entire sad affair.  Nice work, Portlanders, for finally directly naming the enemy.

The FBI Affidavit “was a picture painted to make the suspect sound like a dangerous terrorist,” said Portland photographer Rich Borroughs. “I don’t think it’s clear at all that this person would have ever had access to even a fake bomb if not for the FBI.”

Well, since the office of his mosque center, where documents that may have assisted in the investigation were contained, caught fire almost immediately after Mohamud’s arrest (incredibly, almost before the police had even released his name, much less where he worshipped), we’ll never really know, will we, Richard?

But at least we are focused on the most important aspect of this story, that being the truly sad and tragic destruction of the mosque’s center’s office, and not that we have, yet again, just barely escaped an attack of incredibly devastating proportions by yet another adherent to the self-proclaimed Religion of Peace.

527 Comments

  1. This post sucks.

  2. >> That’s right, the FBI is to blame for this entire sad affair.

    It took a little longer than I thought it would for these cocksuckers to scream “Entrapment!!!11!”.

  3. It smells like old people in here.
    And I’m truly sorry that Satan’s Clubhouse that place went up in flames. How could that happen in one of the world’s largest Islamic countries?

  4. Wiserbud made MJ his poat bitch in a big way!!

    Hahahahahahah!

    *Ahem*.. Sorry MJ, I know your feelings are hurt, here is some poon salve..

  5. Anyone know if the detonator was connected to both the van and the office?

    Just askin questions, that’s all.

  6. If you think I’m going to apologize to MJ, yer insane.

  7. Anyone know if the detonator was connected to both the van and the office?

    FIRE DOESN’T BURN CHAIRS, WINGNUTS!!!!

  8. muslim, just another synonym of ‘leftard’. Flying horses, degradation of women, and lots and lots of tiqiyyaa.

  9. I wonder what the detonation code was: Text URFUCKED to FBI?

  10. Religion of pieces can kiss my ass as well as every fucktard on this plane!!! I need two bloody marys STAT. Hi all!!

  11. …and who in hell shrunk my pants?

  12. Gawd, wisersplooge, this is the worst poat in the history of algore’s internets.

  13. OK, so that’s a first.

    I was just talking to a man in my store about something that happened twelve years ago.

    He said, “Well, I was a little kid then…”
    .
    .
    .
    FML

  14. …and who in hell shrunk my pants?

    The Great Pumpkin?

  15. Nuke the site from orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.

  16. I applaud Wiser and Wiserbud’s poat.

    *golf clap*

  17. I’m going to brag. Not about my ass enlargement but that beasnette ranks 20, in her class, out of 510.

  18. He said, “Well, I was a little kid then…”

    He’s a hurtful, lying bastage.

    And why are you talking about something that happened when you were 17?

  19. Her GPA is 4.1.

    *scratches head*

  20. Good post, wiser.

    FML

    Chilluns like you ain’t gettin’ no sympathy from me.

  21. Oh Wiser. I bet you’ve hurt Cub’s feelings now.

  22. beasnette ranks 20, in her class, out of 510.

    *hears voice of his mother*

    “Think where you would rank if you applied yourself!”

  23. *Throws huge package of pork chops into the room of mourning musilooms.*

  24. jose, you seem in unusually high spirits today???

  25. OK, good post. I didn’t even think about the “destroying evidence” line of thought. My money was on false flag op to generate sympathy. Which it seems to have done.

  26. *Throws huge package of pork chops into the room of mourning musilooms.*

    At least it wasn’t bacon. Criminal waste like that would be inexcusable.

  27. Oh Wiser. I bet you’ve hurt Cub’s feelings now.

    Yeah. That’ll discourage him.

  28. Sympathy?! These are leftards aligned with mooselimbs. This isn’t news. Both groups will say and do anything to destroy western civilization. Fuck them. Fuck them with jagged glass and salt.

  29. …and who in hell shrunk my pants?
    That would be me. Sorry about that…..

  30. Clint I hate flying need a few Indians in me to get on a plane

  31. And for the record, Myasthenia Gravis sucks…..

    Carry on.

  32. Clint I hate flying need a few Indians in me to get on a plane

    Just relax and think of it as gyno exam by someone without the remotest interest in your health.

  33. Where you headed, Jose?

  34. Omar Jamal, first secretary for the Somali mission to the United Nations in New York City, told The Associated Press his office has received “thousands of calls” from Somalis in the United States who are concerned about tactics used by federal agents in the sting operation against Mohamud.

    How dare they investigate tips of terrorism. How dare the FBI ask a suspect if he’d like to blow up Americans.

    There outta be a law.

  35. He said, “Well, I was a little kid then…”

    BWAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!!!!!!

    Wait until you hit the age where the President is younger than you.

  36. Praise from both Geoff and BiW?

    Oh… oh my… I feel faint….

  37. and Xbrad too?

    *doublechecks url…..

    Where the fuck am I?

  38. LMAO BiW

    Atlanta then DFW Brad

  39. Praise from both Geoff and BiW?

    Headlined you, too.

  40. Oh, then the question is, where are you coming from, Jose?

  41. Upset? Well then I suggest they return to Somalia.

  42. Wait until you hit the age where the President is younger than you.

    It’s not as bad as working in a pizza place for so long that now children of the people you worked with are now working at said pizza place.

    And they are in college. Bleh.

  43. Wait until you hit the age where the President is younger than you.

    I thought it was bad when I realized I was Rep. Paul Ryan’s bartender in college.

  44. Headlined you, too.

    thanks for the sidebar link, geoff.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gM7lTXEncdk

  45. Sorry Brad Florida

  46. Well, that linked to an ancient thingamajig I’d forgotten about

  47. Are you glad to be back with us, Jose? We kind of missed you.

  48. Gotta land soon. Good post Wiser.

  49. Interesting, isn’t it? From the article:

    There were no injuries in Sunday’s fire, which burned 80 percent of the center’s office but did not spread to worship areas or any other rooms, said Yosof Wanly, the center’s imam.

    Pretty convenient that ONLY the office was affected, but nothing else. If someone were targeting this group for religious reasons, then they would go for the mosque/worship area first, no? Yeah, I’m thinking inside job….

    And there was a kid here close to DFW who was caught in exactly this same kind of sting. The people in the town were shocked that he was doing this kind of thing, but not shocked at the same time, IYKWIM. He, too, was given ample opportunities to back out, but he kept right on insisting that this was what he wanted to do. No excuses when that is the case – that kid just got sentenced to some hard time, and justifiably so.

    It is interesting that these 19-year-olds who come to this country aren’t really so much interested in blowing THEMSELVES up, just other people. I guess life is worth living in the land of the infidels…..

  50. I knew this story wasn’t going to end well.

  51. *hears voice of his mother*

    “Think where you would rank if you applied yourself!”

    My son is hearing the same thing. Just think what kind of scholarship he could have gotten with a little hard work. He blew off high school and managed a 3.5. He’s applying himself now, so we shall see.

    Now the daughter, let’s see if she can use her academics to her advantage.

  52. Just wait until you are buying something in the infant’s department and the sales lady asks if it is for your grandchild.

    Like a slap in the face.

  53. Bad things happen to ….

    When Tayna Skelton filed for divorce, she accused her husband of leaving the state with the kids without permission, while John raised the issue that his wife is a registered sex offender. Court documents say the 44-year-old had a sexual relationship with a 14-year-old in the summer of 1998. She served time for fourth-degree criminal sexual conduct, according to the state’s sex offender registry

  54. Just wait until you are buying something in the infant’s department and the sales lady asks if it is for your grandchild.

    My wife’s already had that one. 40 year old pregnant women are frickin’ fast.

  55. Just wait until you are buying something in the infant’s department and the sales lady asks if it is for your grandchild.

    heh heh heh. Couple of weeks ago, couple of female friends of wiserson showed up on at the front door, asking for him.

    After he spends some time chatting with them on the front porch, he comes back in with sly smile on his face.

    Wiserbud: “What’s so funny?”

    Wiserson: “One of them asked me if you were my grandfather.”

    Wiserbud: “Your friends are not invited back here again.”

  56. Just wait until you are buying something in the infant’s department and the sales lady asks if it is for your grandchild.

    I’d rather have that than people ask me when the baby is due when I’m not pregnant.

  57. Now I’m just dicking off playing with avatars

  58. I like the new one HM!

  59. Wiserson: “One of them asked me if you were my grandfather.”

    Wiserbud: “Your friends are not invited back here again.”

    Very prudent.

    I’ve gotten that grandma bullshit before … but I think it’s mostly because out here folks get married at 19 – that isn’t unusual at all. By 42, they ARE grandparents.

    Especially when you have 18 y/o or younger having kids.

    Plus, with the trend of young folks having kids before their time, and then dumping them on the grandparents.

    sigh.

  60. wiserbud, did you tell them to get off the lawn on the way in? That might have tipped them off.

  61. Happens to me all the time, Roamy.

  62. When I hear this:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Pp66FNd54M

    I think this:
    http://tinyurl.com/2887wyp

  63. I gotta go to the gym.

    sigh.

  64. There. I told you I was all about the bewbs

  65. There. I told you I was all about the bewbs

    You have a nice rack.

  66. Oh, no! They got my love, Chairazad!

    We must kill the Ottoman splinter group responsible for this outrage!

  67. wiserbud, did you tell them to get off the lawn on the way in? That might have tipped them off.

    I did have to ask one of them to hold the door for me while I moved my walker out of the way.

  68. Heh, HM, that’s how the bewb page got started.

    (sohos’ are bigger)

  69. I think this:

    Romaine, that poster would have a better impact if they took Deb Schlussel off of it.

    {{{{{{{shudder}}}}}}}}}

  70. Nice, HM. I thought for sure you’d go with a de-brained deer or something.

    Wiser, you are my hero. Great post.

  71. (sohos’ are bigger)

    That is an empirical question requiring evidence to which I am not privy.

  72. It’s these chairs! He hates these chairs!!!! STAY AWAY FROM THE CHAIRS!!!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PT3cGdLIHA4#t=00m38s

  73. I’ll stick with this one. Because it’s stupid.

  74. Comment by MJ on November 30, 2010 1:11 pm

    This post sucks.

    ________________________________________

    Comment by MJ on November 30, 2010 2:22 pm

    …….

    Wiser, you are my hero. Great post.

    MJ has multiple personalities?

  75. >> MJ has multiple personalities?

    Comments at 1:11 and 2:22? Thank goodness there’s no 6:66.

  76. Wiser, this was a really good post and captured for me exactly what I was thinking.

  77. Wiser, you are my hero. Great post.
    ————————-
    I make it a rule NOT to read the posts around here, but this one was pretty good. I stand corrected.

    Plus you pushed me down like the back of boy george’s head, hence the you suck comment.

  78. This post?

    I laughed, I cried, it touched me.

    In the swimsuit area.

  79. 270 clicks from Ace, and not one of those fuckers has even said “Hello.”

  80. I’d rather have that than people ask me when the baby is due when I’m not pregnant.

    Yep, had that asked of me too. *sigh*

    And I didn’t have the heart or energy to tell the girl I was SIX MONTHS POSTPARTUM!!

    He was a very large baby, carried way out front.

    Reminds me of a story someone told me. Just an FYI, be careful what you say to whom you may think is pregnant. It might be a TOOMAH.

  81. Standing in line at the Sprint store for an hour is fun

  82. Any body know how to say “You have no fucking idea what you’re talking about, do you?” in Hindi? It would be really, really useful right now as I sit on hold.

  83. Plus you pushed me down like the back of boy george’s head

    hawt

  84. What has happened in this Country? I don’t trust the government and I NEVER trust the media (except, maybe the Enquirer)?

    Have I turned into one of those nuts I hate? Have I always been one of those nuts I hate? Or has something deep and significant happened to the government and the news outlets?

  85. 270 clicks from Ace, and not one of those fuckers has even said “Hello.”

    Like I give a flying fuck in a horse corral.

  86. H/M – http://tinyurl.com/28vffeu

  87. 270 clicks from Ace, and not one of those fuckers has even said “Hello.”

    Well, I screwed up the link for awhile – I had it linked to a comment instead of the top of the post. I think it was actually your comment. So, can you blame them?

  88. Mare, shut up and go get us some beer.

  89. Pipe down, old man. Or I’ll disconnect your hoverround batteries.

  90. Like I give a flying fuck in a horse corral.

    Dude, let it go. All that hate gonna eat you up inside….

  91. Have I turned into one of those nuts I hate? Have I always been one of those nuts I hate?

    Yes. And you’ve been pre-approved for membership in the Michigan Militia, too. Just return the enclosed postage-paid postcard and you’ll receive your membership card and a complimentary ammunition grab-bag filled with 500 rounds of various caliber.

  92. “Mare, shut up and go get us some beer.

    Okay, but you know if I ask, “What kind?” every assface douche here will tell me a different, stupid brand.

    Amber bock or shut your pie holes.

  93. I think it was actually your comment.

    Well, there’s 270 people who we will never see again.

  94. Wah…ace doesn’t love us wah…

  95. David Zucker on Leslie (snicker) Nielsen’s passing: http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/dzucker/2010/11/30/why-leslie-nielsen-was-so-good-at-making-us-happy/

  96. “Just return the enclosed postage-paid postcard and you’ll receive your membership card and a complimentary ammunition grab-bag filled with 500 rounds of various caliber.”

    Awesome!

    *runs to the post office

  97. Brad kinda missed you all too!! Atlanta is crazy at the bar slamming a beer.

  98. Give what up? I merely stated my “give-a-shit” concerning current AOSHQ commenters coming over here to post.

  99. Plus you pushed me down like the back of boy george’s head,

    You snooze, you lose.

    By the way, did you all know that Bailey’s Irish Cream actually has an expiration date?

    I found that out this past weekend, to my chagrin.

  100. Had a headache today and it was an effort not to punch women in the face (I also like the kidney, liver, speen jabs) with their carts in the center of the aisles.

    MOVE THE FLIP OVER, BITCHES!!!

    (But I mean that in a nice way.)

  101. ♪♫ Santa Claus is coming to town . . . to axe murder your ass

  102. Mare, those bitches that DO move their carts to the side of the aisle always manage to stop right where I need to get to.

    **punches fat lady an a track-suit in the poon**

  103. If I said this was German biker girls, it would sound sexier than it really is, but it’s still a cool video.

    http://wimp.com/bicycleskill/

    Uni would be jealous.

  104. Kris Kringle contemplates control. Cowed by caregivers, he carries cargo.

  105. By the way, did you all know that Bailey’s Irish Cream actually has an expiration date?

    So, it becomes a comestible, like curds and whey, rather than a beverage.

    An alcoholic, edible dessert.

    A chewy buzz.

  106. HAHAHAHAHA……xbrad!

    By the way, I’m wearing a pair of adidas black wind pants and a black short jacket. Could be confused for a “track suit.” hahahahaahah

  107. mare, people are just damned rude. They park their asses in the middle of the aisles, whether it be in the store or in the parking lot waiting for parking spots to vacate.

    I get type A with the parking lot kind. By the time I go around them, park way the hell away from the store, walk to the store, their fat asses are finally getting out of their car.

  108. David Zucker on Leslie (snicker) Nielsen’s passing:

    That is one of the nicest eulogies I’ve ever read. Well done, Zucker!

  109. So, it becomes a comestible, like curds and whey, rather than a beverage.

    An alcoholic, edible dessert.

    A chewy buzz.

    A chocolaty, lumpy, emphatic expectorant through the nares….

  110. ♫♪ Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer
    loves the taste of raw entrails
    Washed down with fetid water
    And bumped with some Chicago rails

  111. This story should come with a huge irony alert: http://www.cnbc.com/id/40433316

  112. Randolph the Brown Nosed Reindeer,
    Flew just like the other nine,
    Fast and fleet in the air,
    But he could never stop in time.

  113. Beasn, I think I’m a fatist, if a fat person does something that bugs me I blame it on their fatness and think something really derogitory with regard to said fatness.

    *strange twist….I consider myself fat (NO I’M NOT LOOKING FOR COMPLIMENTS)

  114. आप कोई कमबख्त विचार तुम किस बारे में बात कर रहे हैं, क्या तुम?

    This should be saved for those special moments. Thanks Chief.

  115. the way, I’m wearing a pair of adidas black wind pants and a black short jacket. Could be confused for a “track suit.”

    MOM!!! MARE’S PRETENDING TO BE AN OLD BLACK MAN!!!!!

  116. Andy, reading comments on cnbc’s (or the equivalent) makes me want to poke someone in the eye.

  117. “MOM!!! MARE’S PRETENDING TO BE AN OLD BLACK MAN!!!!!”

    HA!! I’ve considered myself an old man for about 10 years. But, yes, I may be black also.

  118. ♪♫ God rest ye married gentleman
    You besotted Vermoont whores
    With a penchant for teh buggery
    And penis-flavored s’mores

  119. MOVE THE FLIP OVER, BITCHES!!!

    (But I mean that in a nice way.)

    *cough

  120. >> Andy, reading comments on cnbc’s (or the equivalent) makes me want to poke someone in the eye.

    There were comments?

  121. WOULD SOMEONE PLEASE GIVE WISER A COUGH DROP!!

  122. ♪♫I’m dreaming of a white chevy
    With bad-ass pinstripes on the doors

  123. mare, I am sympatico with you….being fatist and prolly a larger than I should have, ass.

    Especially when they scam us out of a cake because the one they ordered was not ‘EXACTLY’ like the picture. And by exactly, the bday banner was not an exact 1/2 inch….not taking into account that when you order a 1/2 sheet, from a 1/4 sheet picture, things have to be adjusted somewhat or that hand decorating with an icing bag does not include a computer program and a mechanical arm for the exact specs.

    Fat ass theives.

  124. WOULD SOMEONE PLEASE GIVE WISER A COUGH DROP!!

    Not without a pair of latex exam gloves.

  125. WOULD SOMEONE PLEASE GIVE WISER A COUGH DROP!!

    I would but he has been eating Jazz’s smores.

    Gross.

  126. Cough drop = heroin suppository.

  127. And by fat ass thieves, I’m talking about the unmarried kind with two children, a year apart, each a different color.

  128. I’d rather have that than people ask me when the baby is due when I’m not pregnant.

    Ha. We had a cahsier who got asked that question all the time when I was stockclerk. I was afraid she would go postal some day.

  129. Here, wiser.

    *hands him an Ex-Lax*

    No really, it will cure your cough.

  130. Mare, your outfit is fine. It’s when you park your cart between me and the cans of Spaghetti’Os that we have a problem.

  131. We are simpatico, Beasn!

  132. HA! I’m actually wearing the Supernova’s:

    http://fsiviewer.adidas.com/fsicache/erez?src=adidas/P91157_F_z.tif

  133. No really, it will cure your cough.

    Actually, I’m good now. Thanks anyway.

    BTW, you can let go of my balls now too.

  134. “BTW, you can let go of my balls now too.”

    hahahahahahahaha

  135. that’s a pretty incredible video, Roamy.

  136. Beasn, I think I’m a fatist, if a fat person does something that bugs me I blame it on their fatness and think something really derogitory with regard to said fatness.

    ————————
    mare, I am sympatico with you….being fatist and prolly a larger than I should have, ass.

    I’m just big-boned, you shrews. Deal with it.

  137. hand decorating with an icing bag does not include a computer program and a mechanical arm for the exact specs.

    Skinny luddite.

  138. Especially when they scam us out of a cake because the one they ordered was not ‘EXACTLY’ like the picture.

    Wait, you give them the cake for free if it isn’t “perfect”?

    Fuck that. I would drop the cake on the floor, walk all over it and tell them you’ll have one ready in 1/2 hour which they will pay for.

  139. Hahahaha

    Wiserbud should go into customer service.

  140. I’m just big-boned, you shrews. Deal with it.

    Scam me out of a cake, you deserve the wrath. Be your nice self, you are big-boned.

  141. Wiserbud should go into customer service.

    I fucking hate people who pull shit like that. I can understand a legitimate complaint (You order a gluten-free cake and don’t get one, for example, or if the name is spelled wrong), but just being a fucking scumbag weasel ’cause you can get away with it just pisses me the fuck off.

  142. “Be your nice self, you are big-boned.”

    I agree, you don’t do stuff that ticks me off.

    And, like I said I’m fat so I’m ranking on myself too.

    But, yes, we may be shrews….hahahaha

  143. Scam me out of a cake, you deserve the wrath. Be your nice self, you are big-boned.

    I don’t even LIKE cake. Harpie

  144. Right, that’s why the staff’s job at HotBride’s inn is to keep me away from the customers.

  145. I’d rather have that than people ask me when the baby is due when I’m not pregnant.

    oh, how about service staff saying what a pretty daughter you have when it’s your sister who’s 7 years younger.

    I waved a steak knife at one of them.

  146. “…but just being a fucking scumbag weasel ’cause you can get away with it just pisses me the fuck off.”

    DITTO

  147. >> Fuck that. I would drop the cake on the floor add the special Warfarin Sauce to it first.

    * hides rat poison *

  148. wiser, yes.

    Pisses us off to no end wasting our time like that and not having our backs. One time a lady came in for her cake at ten in the morning. It was not done yet because she gave us a time of 1:00 pm. She pitched a fit and management told us to do it NOW and then gave it to her for free.

    We asked what was the point of asking a customer for a time – ultimately for us to gage when something gets done, if they were going to disregard it and give shit away.

    We were told not to question management.

    Seriously.

  149. “…but just being a fucking scumbag weasel ’cause you can get away with it just pisses me the fuck off.”

    What about being a fucking scumbag weasel because it entertains you to no end? I’m asking for a friend.

  150. BiW, who is your avatar?

  151. but just being a fucking scumbag weasel ’cause you can get away with it just pisses me the fuck off.

    Gee, that’s kinda like some sort of life philosophy or sumpin.

  152. Heh. From an exchange on another site:

    Okay, federal employee here. I work for the Department of Defense for a bit more than 2 years, after more than 20 years in the private sector. I make 30% LESS than my last private-sector pay. . . . That’s it. I’m happy to do my job. If I need to undergo a pay freeze, so be it. But I’m tired of being mocked, called lazy, and all sorts of other things merely because Uncle Sam signs my pay check.

    I’m tired of federal employees saying, “I work hard, it’s the other guys who are lazy.” Being as they are paid by public monies, all federal employees are on the dole, all are part of an egregiously inefficient bureaucracy with very little – if any – incentive for exceptionalism, and all (should) realize when they sign on the very low regard in which governmental employment is held. (Military excepted – offering one’s life for this country garners some benefits.)

    Cry me a river, ladies. We may have the best form of government ever devised, but that doesn’t mean it’s popular, and you’re part of it. You don’t like the heat, get out of the kitchen.

  153. Misspelled names are an easy fix with a minimum price reduction, if at all. Unless the person who did the cake can’t decorate and writes like a five year old.

    Sometimes it is the person who ordered, who gives the wrong spelling or name.

  154. Hahahaha

    Right, the guy left his private sector job to take a public job that pays 30% less,

    He must be a fucking rocket scientist.

    Sorry, Roamie, no offense.

  155. She pitched a fit and management told us to do it NOW and then gave it to her for free.
    ————————-
    I gotta go call Publix about a cake I didn’t order.

  156. Sometimes it is the person who ordered, who gives the wrong spelling or name.

    Given the really stupid assed bullshit parents pick out of their asses and stick on their kids as names these days, I’m not surprised they screw it up. Where in the hell do these names come from?

  157. Jazz, that dude worked 20 years in the private sector and has to mention that he makes 30% less at his newer public sector job of just two years? Give him two more years and he will prolly be making just as much as he had to actually work up to, prior. Whiner.

  158. I gotta go call Publix about a cake I didn’t order.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ny-IPjX_x64

  159. Right, the guy left his private sector job to take a public job that pays 30% less

    If by “left his private sector job” you mean “was given 5 minutes, a box, and a security escort”, then yeah.

  160. Have you guys seen that commercial where the dad is dipping his sons feet into a vat of white goo in order to produce tough wearing socks (Hanes commercial)?

    I love that commercial. It has a dad rigging up a crazy deal for his kids, the kids happy to go along with it and a wife who cannot beleive what she is seeing. I’ve experienced that several times.

  161. “If by “left his private sector job” you mean “was given 5 minutes, a box, and a security escort”, then yeah.”

    hahahahahahaha….That’s what I was thinking.

  162. Jazz, that dude worked 20 years in the private sector and has to mention that he makes 30% less at his newer public sector job of just two years?

    He may take home less money, maybe even 30%, but you’d be hard-pressed to convince me that bennies, freebies, and bonuses don’t make up the difference.

    /Yes, some government employees get bonuses.

  163. Sometimes it is the person who ordered, who gives the wrong spelling or name.

    If they didn’t name their kids Vulvaria, LeQuisha and Amfeny, it wouldn’t be an issue.

  164. Where in the hell do these names come from?

    Well, the scumbag weasel, who nitpicked the size of the bday banner….her kid’s name was Jeremy. She pronounced it ‘Jeremy’. All three syllables.

    But, she insisted that it was spelled – ‘Jermy’. HAHAHAHA

    Idiot.

  165. “Amfeny”

    hahahahahahaha…..that’s my middle name.

  166. You misspelled Vulvarria.

  167. Anyone feel like getting in on this commentary, please feel free.

    http://tinyurl.com/34xgdql

  168. Two customer service quickies.

    I used to work for a sporting goods store when I lived in Western Michigan.

    At the time, Nike had the stupidest return policy I had ever heard of. Anything with their logo got accepted for return. No exceptions. Didn’t matter if it had been used, abused, screwed, blued, or tattooed. If it sported a swoosh, it came back. I started making someone else do the returns when word got around and entire high school BBall teams started returning their shoes for refund…at the end of the season.

    ————————————————————

    I was the Exercise Equipment Manager. We had a policy that we did not sell floor models unless we didn’t have any in stock. One snowy December morn, I was working with an elderly couple who came in shopping for a Cardio-Rider. Another man came in, clearly in a hurry, circled the department, then got between me and the oldsters, pointed at a machine, and said “I’ll take THAT one.”

    I looked at the old gentleman, who gave a nod to let me know it was ok to dispose of the douchebag. I turned to douchebag, and said,” I’ll be back in a minute with your machine.”

    He grabbed my arm, hard, and pointed to the machine again, saying “I SAID, I’ll take THAT one.”

    I stopped, looked down at his hand, which he then drew back, and told him that it was store policy not to sell display models unless we didn’t have any in stock. Undeterred, he said “I’ll take THIS one! Don’t you know that the customer is always right???”

    I could see my manager watching. I again told him that we don’t sell displays unless we don’t have any in stock. Douchebag says “You just made a big mistake. You just lost a sale. I’m going to [competitor] down the street.”

    I looked him in the eye and said “Good luck with that. On the off chance that you can find someone to help you, they will tell you that they are out. We’re the only ones in town with any in stock right now, but I suspect you already knew that.”

    As he walked away, he shouted about how he’d never had such poor service in his life, and I was going to learn about the customer always being right. As he exited the front of the store, I shouted after him that it couldn’t be true, because if the customer was always right, everything would be free, and it would always be in stock.

    When I turned around, the old guy was laughing and told me he’d take two. My boss told me later that while he could not officially condone my actions, he certainly would not discipline me either.

    Douchebag came back the next day, was considerably nicer, and bought one in a box.

  169. Dude.

  170. BiW, who is your avatar?

    Commander Jeffrey Sinclair, The First Commander of Babylon 5, Ranger One, and the One Who Was™.

  171. But, she insisted that it was spelled – ‘Jermy’. HAHAHAHA

    Almost as stupid as Farv/Favre.

    Wait….

  172. http://news.yahoo.com/s/mashable/20101130/tc_mashable/wikileaks_hit_by_another_ddos_attack

    Some nations are bypassing the DDoS attack and just banning the site outright. China officially blocked access to WikiLeaks earlier today.

    Tom Friedman’s boner for China hit hardest.

  173. Yes, now I remember him. He’s cute.

  174. What about being a fucking scumbag weasel because it entertains you to no end? I’m asking for a friend.

    Hey, as long as you don’t have a problem when you run into someone like me who refuses to put up with your shit, fine by me.

    that’s why the staff’s job at HotBride’s inn is to keep me away from the customers.

    Back when I had a courier service, there was someone who didn’t give the store his full address. I drove out to where his house should have been and … no house.

    I drive to a pay phone, called the store, they call the customer to get the right address. I drive there, only to find out it’s an apartment complex and I have no apartment number.

    Back in the car, back to the pay phone, call the store, who calls the customer for the rest of the info. I guess they gave the store owner a hard time on the phone, because as he’s giving me the info, he says “And if they give you any shit, feel free to deal with them anyway you want.”

    I smile.

    I drive back to the address and finally find the right apartment and knock on the door.

    Old guy answers and I start to apologize for the delay (knowing it wasn’t my fault in the least.) But, before I can finish and hand him his package, his wife starts yelling in the background “IS THAT HIM? IS HE FINALLY HERE?? SO, YOU FINALLY FOUND THE PLACE? WHY WERE YOU HAVING SO MUCH TROUBLE?? ARE YOU STUPID OR SOMETHING??”

    I look at the guy and smile.

    Then I say “Look, I don’t know who you two think you are, or why you think I should know where you live simply because of your name. But I promise you this. I will never, ever forget your address again. Because I am never fucking coming back, you fucking douchebag. So fuck you and fuck your bitch wife.”

    I threw his package on the floor and walked away.

    I truly enjoyed that moment.

  175. I threw his package on the floor and walked away.

    And then you found $20.

  176. I truly enjoyed that moment.

    I can’t even make up stories that good.

  177. Good snark post, Richard.

    Islam, the Religion of Piece(s of your skull and brain scattered all over the fucking place)

  178. He grabbed my arm, hard,

    See, this is the part where I would’ve become unemployed.

  179. Here’s my customer service story:

    Loading a C-2 Greyhound to meet an overhead time. Co-pilot sticks his head in and asks how much longer it was going to take to finish the load out and weight and balance report.

    “I won’t tell you how to fly this pig if you don’t tell me how to load the fucker. NFQ!”

  180. No prescriptions for you!

    Come back 2 years!

  181. 9 out of 10 morons agree. Wiser and Wiserbud wrote a good poat.

    Who are you, and FUCK SALT!!!!!

  182. Who’s up for a Happy Ending from Mare?

    *raises hand*

  183. “I won’t tell you how to fly this pig if you don’t tell me how to load the fucker. NFQ!”

    Variation on a theme: I do a lot of consulting work, and I love it when a client asks me a question clearly indicating they have no idea what their end goal is for a project. As if I’m somehow supposed to tell them what they’re trying to achieve with the stupid, ill-advised shit they come up with. “Hey, you’re the one fucking this chicken. I’m just holding its head.”

  184. I started making someone else do the returns when word got around and entire high school BBall teams started returning their shoes for refund…at the end of the season.

    See, I wouldn’t have had a problem with this. This is Nike’s stupid fucking decision. I would take back each and every single item returned. Hell, I would have taken stuff if they had simply drawn the swoop on it themselves.

    The company makes a dumbass decision like this that benefits the client to this degree, I am more than happy to help bring the inevitable moment of realization of how fucking stupid they are about as quickly as possible.

  185. No prescriptions for you!

    Come back 2 years!

    ‘zackly!

  186. Good snark post, Richard.

    snark?

    I was hoping it would act as troll bait.

  187. I get headhunter calls. I could make a lot more in the private sector than I am earning now, but:
    1. I’d probably have to move to CA, which would negate any salary increase.
    b. I’d probably have to work full-time. (though one company was desperate enough to say I could keep working part-time)
    ç. I’d have to dress the part.
    §. I know as soon as the satellite is built, I’ll be given a box, 5 minutes, and a security escort out.

    I will say thank you, then I’ll STFU and get back to work.

  188. I was hoping it would act as troll bait.

    Surprising that it hasn’t, given your reputation as a master baiter.

  189. Surprising that it hasn’t, given your reputation as a master baiter.
    ————–
    ***hangs head, slowly shakes it back and forth.

  190. Surprising that it hasn’t, given your reputation as a master baiter.

    HAHAHAHAHA! Winner! Winner! Chicken Dinner!

  191. Rosetta, answer your phone!!!!

  192. I want redundant government agencies and departments closed with large layoffs and buyouts for longer-term employees.

    This was the winning comment for me. Amen, brother.

  193. Scenes from a Nebraska tit bar: http://tinyurl.com/2cp5rok

  194. ***hangs head, slowly shakes it back and forth.

    Sorry, dude. He’s not a regular….

  195. Someone, PLEASE go knock the federal employee(s) down a notch.

    http://tinyurl.com/34xgdql

    I’ve been as aggressive as I can without offending the limits of what I perceive to be the host’s sense of decorum. Most of the people there are on the right side of things, although they’re awfully silent as to my commentary.

  196. I was shopping in the grocery store and a customer wanted a Xmas reindeer cast iron decoration thing, but it was on the top shelf and she couldn’t reach it, neither could the store employee who was trying to help her. So I stop and get it down and hand it to her. She grabs it from me and says ‘It’s about time!”

    I start to walk away and then she says “Wait, I want another one”. My middle fingers were so itching to flip. I just kept walking.

  197. http://tinyurl.com/2dfy2qo

  198. Kill me please!!!!!! Two howling infants right in my ear.

  199. Someone, PLEASE go knock the federal employee(s) down a notch.

    Actually, if he’ serving in the military, I feel kind of bad for him. I guarantee TSA agents make more money than he does. Even if he is simply working in the DoD now, his department is always the one that is first in line for the cuts, while the other, far less important “workers” do nothing and keep getting raises.

  200. I start to walk away and then she says “Wait, I want another one”. My middle fingers were so itching to flip. I just kept walking.

    you are a much better person than I am.

  201. Contractors with DOD is very different than GS (government service) employees. DOD government workers mostly work 4 day work weeks, come in late (make up for it by leaving at 3). don’t make decisions, rarely understand the technical issues at hand and pass on blame for problems to contractors.

  202. you are a much better person than I am.

    But then I get home and kick myself for not saying something.

  203. Contractors with DOD is very different than GS (government service) employees. DOD government workers mostly work 4 day work weeks, come in late (make up for it by leaving at 3). don’t make decisions, rarely understand the technical issues at hand and pass on blame for problems to contractors.

    Sounds like your typical architect.

  204. Nice tits:

    http://tinyurl.com/ceaa7h

  205. Back to the “I’m officially old” portion of the discussion, I signed up for something called eRewards, which pays you a little for taking surveys. Been doing it for years. (e-rewards.com)

    You get a small amount (25 or 50 cents) if you start the survey but don’t meet the qualifications that the surveying entity is looking for, and a larger amount, up to $10 or so, if you do and complete the survey.

    I’ve noticed lately that, right after they ask my age, they thank me but say that I do not meet the qualifications of their target respondents.

    Hmmmmm……….

  206. I didn’t deal with a lot of DoD employees, but I’ll tell you this. In all my time, I think I met a grand total of one Department of the Army civilian employee that was worth a used dog shit.

  207. well, you guys have more experience with DoD employees, so I’ll leave him to your tender charms….

  208. Actually, if he’ serving in the military, I feel kind of bad for him. I guarantee TSA agents make more money than he does.

    He’s not, although he was.

    Even if he is simply working in the DoD now, his department is always the one that is first in line for the cuts, while the other, far less important “workers” do nothing and keep getting raises.

    You know what? I don’t give a shit. With the exception of the military, government employment, to me, means, “I couldn’t hack it in the private sector.” While I know individuals like Romy who don’t fit this mold, my initial reaction to government employees is uniformly unfavorable. And to freely choose to work for an employer that is held in low regard and then bitch about the stigma of that relationship? Go fuck yourself, bud. (Not you, wiser – the offended fed employee.)

  209. Kill me please!!!!!! Two howling infants right in my ear.

    Are they yours?

  210. I got a sweater for my birthday……..
    … I would have preferred a moaner or a screamer.

  211. (Not you, wiser – the offended fed employee.)

    Oh, my remarks do not take away from the fact that he’s obviously a whiny bitch.

    Look, if you can’t make good money as a federal employee these days, you really are a loser.

  212. Any port in a storm eh, xbrad?

  213. If you require representation by a union to bargain for you and protect your job, you are a loser.

  214. Anybody know of a good midget stripper club?

    Rosetta says there’s one in Munchkin Land called the Yellow Brick Shithouse.

  215. Anybody know of a good midget stripper club?

    Andy recommended this one to me. Not sure why.

    http://tinyurl.com/cx6ys5

  216. I’m a bachelor for five or six days.

    Stocks of Kleenex and hand lotion skyrocket!!

  217. Driving. Later!

  218. Heh. Me too. I’ll meet you at ‘Lil Debbie’s House of Half-pints.

  219. Or the Waffle Hut.

  220. ESPN showed Joe Morgan the door and no one told me?

  221. Joe Morgan is a former baseball player and talking head on various baseball shows. He rivals Tim McCarver for stupidity and irrelevancy.

  222. Almost drive time.

    Be honest. Does this make my hump look fat?

    *inhales 3 pcs. fried chicken, onion rings, and a slice of cheesecake*

  223. Laura, of all the women I know with mishapen humps sticking out of their backs, your’s is the fattest.

  224. Dick how’s the weather?? Saw a midget at the airport in Atlanta could have stuffed him in my bag had I known you were looking for one

  225. *beams with pride*

    Thanks, xbrad.

  226. Thinking of buying this to wear to a wedding next weekend: http://is.gd/i0Pcp

  227. Good Dick sick of rain. Yep got married!

  228. Sheesh, Dick, only if I want to look like a whore.

  229. We like it when you look like a whore.

  230. Aggie??????

    http://tinyurl.com/37jjtlh

  231. Congratulations, JoseP! Hope you and the new mister are very happy –

    As to the article linked much earlier, I think that the Boy Wonder truly doesn’t understand what the election results mean:

    “The American people did not vote for gridlock,” Obama said in a press conference following the meeting.

    Then again, he’s so much smarter than the rest of us troglodytes…..

  232. Congrats, josefpdaddy!

  233. Congrats, Joe!

    Does the man know about us yet?

  234. Thinking of buying this to wear to a wedding next weekend:

    Hmmm, interesting color choice.

    I figured you more for a Summer…..

  235. Josie – Welcome to the institution. Remember to take all of the medication Nurse Rackett gives you.

  236. JoseP, just remember http://i.imgur.com/CmfSE.jpg

  237. Herp derp.

  238. Above link is the repubs and Nancy Pelosi.

  239. Mesa- Norton only found 9 viruses infecting that site you just linked!

  240. >> Mesa- Norton only found 9 viruses infecting that site you just linked!

    Cleaner than Rosetta’s last crackwhore.

  241. That explains why my iPhone refused to open it.

  242. Norton must not like shockwave.

  243. _../’―||||||||―――― ]
    ==o_____________|
    ),―.(_(__)/
    //(\)),――’
    //___//

  244. NoScript said ‘no way’ to it also.

  245. Hmm, I’m running noscript. A forum with over a hundred commenters didn’t mention a virus.

    I’ll delete it. Too bad, it’s pretty funny.

  246. like 9-11, this was an inside j*b……

  247. Fine, I’ll just link Sean from last night — http://i.imgur.com/nt4zF.gif

  248. Katherine Mcphee is actually amusing on RedEye

  249. Hey! It’s some guy with mesa’s avatar!

    Also, shut up, Dick.

  250. Cleaner than Rosetta’s last crackwhore.

    DON’T TALK SHIT ABOUT LAURAW!!!

  251. LauraWis the kindest, bravest, warmest, most wonderful human being I’ve ever known in my life.

    52 red queens. . . .

  252. http://is.gd/i114o

    What’s the problem?

    http://is.gd/i11jw

    OH.

  253. Who is redc1c4?

  254. Rosetta, tell me about your weather.

    It’s 72 degrees and the clouds all look like poon. And it’s snowing monkey fists in a rainbow of cocaine.

    Here’s a video from our local TV station:

    http://tinyurl.com/3xws8rs

  255. Roamy – Either a ginger or a commie.

  256. red is a contributor at the mothership.

  257. 52 red queens

    ???
    I don’t get it.

    *tackles MCPO anyway, and ‘charges the Hoverround.’*

  258. Dang it, Rosetta! I fell for that. And I got rickrolled by dick today, too.

    **facepalm

  259. It’s 72 degrees and the clouds all look like poon.

    Fuck the sky. Fuck it like the cheap little whore it is.

  260. “Comment by MJ on November 30, 2010 1:11 pm

    This post sucks.”

    This post is awesome! You suck, retard.

    Yeah I know, this reply is childish, but, when faced with the overwhelming intellect of MJ, I have to pack it in. Obviously there is no chance of combating such a staggering intellect in the realm of ideas. No, the only refuge is a quick name call and then run to the hills. I hope he/she/it doesn’t see this reply and eviscerate me with its razor wit and laser like mental focus.

  261. I remember… I remember. I can see that Chinese cat standing there and smiling like Fu Manchu saying: The Queen of Diamonds is reminiscent in many ways of Raymond’s LauraW’s dearly loved and hated mother… and is the second key to clear the mechanism for any other assignment.

  262. Congrats josefP

  263. “Comment by MJ on November 30, 2010 1:11 pm

    This post sucks.”

    This post is awesome! You suck, retard.

    Yeah I know, this reply is childish, but, when faced with the overwhelming intellect of MJ, I have to pack it in. Obviously there is no chance of combating such a staggering intellect in the realm of ideas. No, the only refuge is a quick name call and then run to the hills. I hope he/she/it doesn’t see this reply and eviscerate me with its razor wit and laser like mental focus.

    Or it could be that MJ is a regular, and Wiser and Wiserbud pushed his new poat down like a poor unfortunate soul standing between Kerry Marie and a pizza, and gave the appropriate Hostage response.

    Nnnnaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh. Couldn’t be that.

  264. Fuck you, BiW, let MJ fight his own battles.

    That’s the fucking problem with lawyers. The breathing. That in and out. Can’t you just quit.

  265. I am uncomfortable in the midst of all of this conflict. I think I’ll just sit over here in the corner. . . away from the humorless gits who fly in, shit on the carpet, and then leave.

  266. *looks into MCPO’s eyes*
    http://is.gd/i15im

    *looks in Yellow Pages for a firefighting pharmacist-priest*

    Oh thank God there’s a whole page of them

  267. “It’s 72 degrees and the clouds all look like poon. And it’s snowing monkey fists in a rainbow of cocaine.”

    Oh no, Rosetta is on the meth again.

  268. LauraW – You need to see this: http://tinyurl.com/h4ocb

  269. Hey, Vikinggord, would you like a beer, some peanuts, meth, or normal sex?

    Because you can get only two of those here.

  270. Rosetta is almost cool enough to watch this video.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aJpIQ3dituE

    Ha!! I love that song. I used to own the 45 and it’s on a bunch of my iPod playlists which bugs Mrs. Rosetta.

    Tell Kelly i said “thank you” for her introducing that song to you.

  271. OH, okay.

    You still need to see an eye doctor.

  272. I’m almost afraid to ask which two Mare is offering…

  273. Hey, Jackhole (xbrad) I’m not offering anything, I was just letting them know what could be found here or in your closet.

  274. Did PJM kill any of her chldren on the ride home from Utah? If yes, which one and why?

  275. Queen of Hearts

    *what do you want me to do?*

  276. you know when you read/poat via phone you lose a LOT

  277. Mare, don’t make me stop this fucking cart right in the middle of the damn aisle.

  278. Mare, whoever xbrad said you’re a Secret Santa for, it’s supposed to be me.

  279. I think JD on wheel of fortune plays for the other team NTTAWWT

  280. Mare, whoever xbrad said you’re a Secret Santa for, it’s supposed to be me.

    You’re getting the 1/2 bag of peanuts.

  281. hahahaha Rosetta’s not getting a gift?

  282. Rosetta, I have a secret Santa gift for you:

  283. Name that Hostage

    http://tinyurl.com/39l6n7e

  284. “I think JD on wheel of fortune plays for the other team NTTAWWT”

    Rosetta, if no one gets you, I’ll take you IYKWIMAITTYD.

  285. Fuck you, BiW, let MJ fight his own battles.

    Brad, don’t you have something to do? Like testing the charge of your car battery with your tongue?

  286. Is Roamy’s link one of those things only smart people get?

  287. The link to google wasn’t what I was expecting.

  288. dang it!

  289. Hey, Hostages should I ask for a kitten for Christmas?

    If I do, I’m naming her Rosetta.

  290. That was deep, Rome.

  291. hmmmmm who could THAT be?

  292. “You’re getting the 1/2 bag of peanuts.”

    hahahahaa, if that.

  293. Try this

  294. Finally, the hot chicks showed up!

  295. Sure isn’t gonna be normal sex.

    *looks at closet full of latex thongs, picks the Sapphire Blue one*

  296. hahahaha Rosetta’s not getting a gift?

    BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

  297. OH.

    Does anybody else wonder whether Laura actually works, as opposed to looking for stuff like this?

  298. well wiserbud has gone on and on about how he didnt get a gift. I dont even remember that happening

  299. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

    That looks like Dave….HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

  300. I’m sending Rosetta a fluffy cloud for Christmas.

  301. Or Brewfan. Possibly, Paulitics.

  302. hahahaha Rosetta’s not getting a gift?

    BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

    *tapes pieces of coupon for free one year subscription to ‘Naked Curtain Hangers Monthly’, hands it to Rosetta*

    June is the Russett month, Rosie.

  303. Rosetta, what do you see in this picture?

    http://tinyurl.com/389cgob

  304. I’m sending Rosetta a cup-o-fart

  305. Soho, I had Wiser. I ordered a bunch of stuff but I had it sent to me….in Hawaii. It was very late getting to me and then I had to mail it to Rosetta. It was all a big SNAFU. I felt so badly I kept calling Wiser’s SS an asshole, douche. He got it after Christmas.

  306. Rosetta, if no one gets you, I’ll take you IYKWIMAITTYD.

    http://tinyurl.com/364aa99

  307. I’m sending SoHoS a complete collection of Favre snapshots.

  308. I was pretty sure that looked like Brewfan, but Dave is a close second…

  309. I’m sending Rosetta a cup-o-fart

    *sniff sniff*

    WORST CHRISTMAS EVER!!!

  310. I was pretty sure that looked like Brewfan
    I thought it was your mom.

  311. Huh, no one answered my kitten question.

  312. Huh, no one answered my kitten question.

    I need to see your kitten before I can answer that.

  313. Rosetta, what do you see in this picture?

    http://tinyurl.com/389cgob

    Low self-esteem and silicone.

  314. Brewfan, go to your room….now!

  315. Ive seen Farve in all his “un”glory and I am so NOT interested. I am a HUGE Saints fan. Hint Hint!

  316. I’ll be there in a second.

  317. Get a cat and name him Sox.

  318. Low self-esteem and silicone.

    A combination as perfect as peanut butter and chocolate.

  319. Packer fans are funny. On the blogs #4 is now known as Brett Pevre.

  320. I didn’t know Santonio played for the Saints.

  321. Hey, Hostages should I ask for a kitten for Christmas?

    If I do, I’m naming her Rosetta.

    Her? No, it has to be a boy, and you have to have his bits nipped off and thrown into the spare parts bag at the vet’s office.

    Then it will be a true Rosetta.

    Does anybody else wonder whether Laura actually works, as opposed to looking for stuff like this?

    Like you never google ‘asian boys waterpolo schlong pic.’

  322. Brewfan, go to your room….now!

    I’m in my room!

  323. “Like you never google ‘asian boys waterpolo schlong pic.’”

    Top Hostage search.

  324. I didn’t know Santonio played for the Saints.

    hahahahaha! I had to show off that pic the other day of him in the shower 😉

  325. What were you doing in the shower with a pic of..

    ok nevermind

  326. What were you doing in the shower with a pic of..

    Exactly what you think the variable-setting showerhead is for.

  327. *replaces mental image of Santonio with mental image of sohos*

    much better!

  328. I’ll be there in a second, Brewfan. Do you have wine and or beer?

  329. I swear its just to make sure your back gets clean

  330. Do you have wine and or beer?

    Yes.

  331. Her? No, it has to be a boy, and you have to have his bits nipped off and thrown into the spare parts bag at the vet’s office.

    Then it will be a true Rosetta.

    It’s comments like this why people hate your guts.

    http://tinyurl.com/3yz4fhp

  332. Brett Farve’s pictures were more disappointing than when xbrad brought his cream custurd dessert to the Hostage Christmas party.

  333. http://tinyurl.com/3ys4z3q

  334. HAHAHAHAHA….Holy Cow, Rosetta, were you referring to our Santonio reference?

  335. Yay! I have a bed again.

  336. Sorry, Mare, I’ll bring enough for you to have seconds next time.

  337. Rosetta, may I please borrow your flamethrower, we have an xbrad infestation again?

  338. yay Tattoo!

  339. Evenin’, cool people and Rosetta.

  340. I’m pretty excited about it.

    Plus I also found a shop in town that makes custom bras.

  341. Tat, how long have you been roughing it. (SYWM’S)

  342. L to R: Wiserbud and every woman he’s ever met.

    http://tinyurl.com/27lgaj8

  343. Most of last week into this week. It doesn’t look like things are going to calm down for another week or so.

  344. Tat, I wish you a very peaceful Christmas.

  345. Dear Secret Santa, I would love a flamethrower for Christmas. TIA

  346. Let’s all buy each other a flamethrower for Christmas and then bring them to the next meat-up.

  347. Tat, I wish you a very peaceful Christmas.

    Thanks. I’m wishing for some custom made bras this Christmas.

  348. Can I borrow some tweezers from somebody?

    http://tinyurl.com/334qs3g

  349. Let me know how the custom bra is for you. PJM stole my favorite bra when we were in CT

  350. Is that your hand, Dave?

  351. Howdy Andy!

  352. Can I borrow some tweezers from somebody?

    Looks like you’re going to be celibate for a while.

  353. I think John Stossel is so weird looking

  354. I think John Stossel Willem DaFoe is so weird looking.

    FIFM

  355. Let me know how the custom bra is for you. PJM stole my favorite bra when we were in CT

    How rude.

    I will definitely let you know.

  356. Did anybody lock anybody else in a room with a rabid weasel today?

  357. Dick, you ever read Flag of Our Fathers?

  358. >> Let’s all buy each other a flamethrower for Christmas and then bring them to the next meat-up.

    I figured you’d be more into this, since you’re usually smuggling some ammo: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tJHfXNs1PgE

  359. I agree with that too Romy

  360. Did anybody lock anybody else in a room with a rabid weasel today?

    Would a rabid raccoon count?

  361. Although all the Hostages are clever, charming and funny … mare and beasn in particular made me smile bunches today.

  362. Hi, Sohootenanny!

  363. >> Looks like you’re going to be celibate for a while.

    Nah, it’s blind date night anyway.

  364. Yeah, Clint. You are obviously a man of taste and sophistication.

  365. Would a rabid raccoon count?

    No.

  366. Did anybody lock anybody else in a room with a rabid weasel today?

    Yes, but I have a reason. That fucking paperboy missed the porch again!

  367. speaking of dates Dave you heading this way before the end of the year?

  368. No.

    Well, kiss my ass then.

  369. Mare, you nailed me. *Modest grin.*

  370. yeah, I want the flamethrower

  371. IMPORTANT FLOYD ALERT:

    Porky peed on the floor again. S’Shortcake, remember how you said Floyd would go through a teenage rebellion phase?

    He’s been a douche for the last couple of days.

    TIME OUT, PIG DOG!!!

  372. Okay, so flamethrowers all around….

  373. >> Dvae, just pull it out , ya pussy.

    You pull it out for me. Wait a sec, lemme put these vise grips on your nuts.

    Let’s not hurt each other now.

    >> speaking of dates Dave you heading this way before the end of the year?

    Date night?

    *thud

  374. Does anyone else love the fact that Floyd is Rosetta in dog form?

  375. Rosetta, I “enjoyed” the story about the shootings in front of the funeral home while the funeral was happening in St. Louie today. Kinda makes the city proud, I’m thinking. Wonder if they were Obama supporters? (I know! Silly question.)

  376. Well, kiss my ass then.

    Hey, I asked about a weasel. I’m no scientician, but I’m pretty sure weasels and raccoons are different animals.

  377. Okay…I have some Christmas decorating fun to do that may or may not include Tazeing Floyd in his junk.

    See you assmeats tomorrow.

  378. Ahhhh, traditional Christmas music is the best!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HuTHxMjVivg

  379. Porky peed on the floor again. S’Shortcake, remember how you said Floyd would go through a teenage rebellion phase?

    Oh, sweetie, you haven’t even hit the teenage/rebellious phase yet. If he’s peeing consistently in the same spot, make sure that spot has been fairly well soaked in vinegar and cleaned–that should cut any smell. Put his water out at specific times (when you’re feeding him, etc), and then pick it up. Make sure that he goes out to pee ~30 min after drinking. Buy some baby gates and baby gate him in to the kitchen or some other non-carpeted floor where you can still keep an eye on him.

  380. Who got Rosetta for SS?

    I hear he likes grilled cheese sandwiches

  381. I already have a flamethrower.

    I kinda want a bazooka now.

  382. Seriously, I’m thinking about asking for a kitten. I miss Puka but she’s my mom’s now and I just couldn’t take Puka from her.

    I’ve been living with lots of dogs and I’m sick of looking at balls all the time. Although one of the dogs is female and is the complete and total sweetie of the group.

  383. Thanks, Tats.

  384. Sounds great! I got your name xbrad…Wha?

  385. Scott, what did you Google to find that?

  386. Thanks, Tats.

    You’re welcome. My bill’s in the mail.

    Does anyone have any familiarity w/ hotplates (or double hotplate) setups?

  387. goodnight roseannaroseannadanna

  388. get a kitty Mare

  389. Thanks, Sohos. I was waiting for someone to encourage me.

  390. I’m sick of looking at balls all the time.

    *puts pants back on*

  391. Thanks, Sean. If only all Hostage men were as thoughtful as you.

  392. Tatts – I used to have a hotplate for years. What is your question?

  393. Brand recommendations? Things to look for/watch out for? I’m setting up a small kitchenette in my basement abode and I want to be able to cook in/on more than just the microwave.

  394. Does anyone have any familiarity w/ hotplates (or double hotplate) setups?

    I think they have to be plugged in. Is it plugged in?

  395. My 34oz thermos is so far doing and excellent job of replacing the crappy office coffee machine that pretends to be a low-rent barista but succeeds only in making bitter coffee that stains my teeth.

    Diagram that sentence. I dare you.

  396. Get a toaster oven, Tats. Handy as all get out.

  397. Gotta watch Biggest Loser be back later

  398. I bet I could teach Floyd to take a dump on Rosetta’s pillow.

    I’d have to show him how. Puppies learn by example.

  399. Get a toaster oven, Tats. Handy as all get out.

    That’s on my list of items, as well as a small fridge.

  400. Leon, when I was the Colonel’s driver, he “borrowed” a cup of coffee out of my stainless steel thermos.

    Once.

  401. Tats, my uncle had a Toastie Plus for years. I forget the brand, but it was a great appliance.

  402. Hahahaha Dave,

    Oh wait I am lurking. Hi Mare!

    I guess I stink at lurking

  403. Tatts – I had a proctor-Silex single burner for years. Never used a double burner, but one of the guys in the barracks had one. . . don’t remember the brand.

    Before microwaves, hotplates and toaster ovens were ALL that we used.

  404. I also vote toaster oven.

  405. XBrad, so far, no one’s asked to share. Pretty sure no one’s sneaked it yet, either.

    Which is good, I’d hate for anyone to notice the whiskey.

  406. dont need no stinking hotplate.

    Turn your iron upside down and brace it on the ironing board with a pair of boots.

    Since hotplates are forbidden in the barracks.

  407. Correction: Flags of Our Fathers, by James Bradley, the son of the Navy medic who raised the flag on Iwo Jima.

    I enjoyed reading it, and I learned a lot. I don’t recommend Flyboys by the same author – that was sad and very graphic.

  408. http://www.amazon.com/Waring-DB60-Portable-Double-Burner/dp/B000I16B18/ref=pd_sim_k_1

    That’s what I’m leaning toward right now. I like the double burner.

    It’s kinda hard to cook mac&cheese in a toaster oven.

  409. Tatts – Just make sure the burner pans can be removed for cleaning.

  410. It’s kinda hard to cook mac&cheese in a toaster oven.

    True, but you can make a dandy cheese sammich.

  411. Yes, Vmax, you suck as a lurker…hahahahaha

  412. Here you go Mare,
    no balls, cause I have no thumb!
    DSC_9086

  413. I saw this on the same page, Tats. Could come in handy.

  414. Fuck the toaster oven. You got a hotplate and you need toast?

    Git yerself one of these:

    http://tinyurl.com/3yhc99w

  415. Hey Tat, if you want it, I have a bread machine I’ve not used in years. Free if you pay shipping.

  416. Does anyone else love the fact that Floyd is Rosetta in dog form?

    HAHAHAHA

    I’ve thought that with the first picture he poated. Fat head, incontinent, and everything.

  417. Could come in handy.

    It could.

  418. TI you already own a hot plate http://www.amazon.com/Manifold-Destiny-Guide-Cooking-Engine/dp/0375751408

  419. xbrad, you around? Thanks for the poat you did of Dick Winters and the band the kid is selling. I bought one for my son’s stocking.

    He loved Band of Brothers and was given the dvds one Christmas. Is still very interested in all things WWll.

  420. Hey Tat, if you want it, I have a bread machine I’ve not used in years. Free if you pay shipping.

    Let me think about it. I’m not a huge bread eater.

  421. Vmax, that’s an angle of a dog I like!

  422. I’m not a huge bread eater.

    Yeah, I’m done with bread entirely at this point. Found the machine when we cleared out the furnace room prepping to put the new floor in. I was going to chuck it or donate it.

  423. You’re welcome, Beasn. I’m glad to spread the word.

  424. TI you already own a hot plate

    Hmmm, something tells me that standing around in Jan in 0 degrees trying to heat shit up on my car engine is not going to be all that much fun.

  425. Hey Tat, if you want it, I have a bread machine I’ve not used in years.

    http://tinyurl.com/3y5x8yy

  426. Yeah, I’m done with bread entirely at this point.

    Oh I love hot rolls and fresh biscuits, but to cook up a loaf of bread regularly enough… I dunno.

  427. try this one Mare!
    DSC_9123

  428. Hmmm, something tells me that standing around in Jan in 0 degrees trying to heat shit up on my car engine is not going to be all that much fun.

    HAHAHAHAHA! I love a woman with a knack for the obvious!

  429. Flyboys is one of the few books that made me cry, and I hate that.

  430. Comment by MCPO Airdale on November 30, 2010 2:56 pm

    Give what up? I merely stated my “give-a-shit” concerning current AOSHQ commenters coming over here to post.

    Gee if that’s how you really feel MCPO I won’t sully this website anymore.
    BTW, what the hell did I or other commenters do to you?

  431. Pupster, if you want the bread machine, same deal. Just say yes before Tat.

  432. Zeke is a beautiful dog, Vmax. I am fascinated by the need to retrieve (seeing how Zeke had his ball). It’s really amazing and wonderful how that is in their blood.

  433. MPFS – Your call, mate.This site ain’t about holding hands and singing Kumbaya!

  434. Gee if that’s how you really feel MCPO I won’t sully this website anymore.
    BTW, what the hell did I or other commenters do to you?

    *sigh

  435. Yeah, I’m done with bread entirely at this point.

    *shakes fists at sky*

    GLUUUUUUUUTEN!!!

  436. Tattoo,
    for cooking I want a gas cook top. When I am not cooking, I want a oven or microwave, occasionally a saute pan.

    But mostly a oven. For all the Pizza, Chicken fingers, French Fries, etc.

    Hot plate for Mac and Cheese, and soup.

  437. *sigh*

  438. Welcome, cub.

    http://tinyurl.com/3ywk7os

  439. GLUUUUUUUUTEN!!!

    Well that and wheat lectins. And carbs. Mostly carbs.

  440. I don’t know how or why Chief caring (or not caring) about folks posting over here should be an issue.

    We dont’ all have to love each other.

    You don’t have to fall in love. Just fall in line. Right Wiser?

  441. Pupster, if you want the bread machine, same deal. Just say yes before Tat.

    What color is it?

  442. Kumbaya my Lord, kumbaya
    Kumbaya my Lord, kumbaya
    Kumbaya my Lord, kumbaya
    Oh Lord, kumbaya

    Someone’s singing Lord, kumbaya
    Someone’s singing Lord, kumbaya
    Someone’s singing Lord, kumbaya
    Oh Lord, kumbayah

    Someone’s laughing, Lord, kumbaya
    Someone’s laughing, Lord, kumbaya
    Someone’s laughing, Lord, kumbaya
    Oh Lord, kumbaya

    Someone’s crying, Lord, kumbaya
    Someone’s crying, Lord, kumbaya
    Someone’s crying, Lord, kumbaya
    Oh Lord, kumbaya

    Someone’s praying, Lord, kumbaya
    Someone’s praying, Lord, kumbaya
    Someone’s praying, Lord, kumbaya
    Oh Lord, kumbaya

    Someone’s sleeping, Lord, kumbaya
    Someone’s sleeping, Lord, kumbaya
    Someone’s sleeping, Lord, kumbaya
    Oh Lord, kumbaya

    Only an ass would write or sing that song.

  443. HI MARE!!!!!

  444. You don’t have to fall in love. Just fall in line. Right Wiser?

    Bingo.

    *does the wink and “click-click” thing while pointing finger at Car In like a gun.

  445. Local news just said that a skydiver missing for two months may have been found. They found a guy in a farm field in Perris, CA wearing an unopened parachute. There’s a Russian tourist that has been missing for two months after he went skydiving.

    The Sheriff’s department says they aren’t sure it is the same guy.

  446. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1dwdcxDVDh0

  447. Mare doesn’t care about folk singers.

    http://tinyurl.com/3yzr7rw

  448. What color is it?

    It used to be white. It’s sort of off-white now. I think it’s also 14 years old now.

  449. Mare – I hope like hell you used ‘cut & paste’ for that!

  450. Hey Carin, you are a wise woman. Are you Indian?

    Puppers, that’s one of the funniest gif’s ever!!!

  451. I never need anyone to hold my hand pal. I just think you are being a prick.

  452. hums Kumbaya quietly.

  453. Only an ass would write or sing that song.

    What about people who copy and paste the lyrics?

    *ducks flying shoe*

  454. “hums Kumbaya quietly.”

    hahahaha…I suggest just thinking it…..in your head.

  455. So I was watching Goodfellas for about the 27th time the other day and it hit me, Mare might be Karen Hill.

  456. I just think you are being a prick.

    You’ll have to buy me dinner before you get that kind of treatment!

  457. Hey Carin, you are a wise woman. Are you Indian?

    Twice removed on my mother’s side.

    *single tear falls down my cheek as I think about pollution.

  458. Puppers, I know that guy is a rapper douche but that is a great gif too and is an excellent representation of my feelings for assface, douchewords folk singers.

  459. for cooking I want a gas cook top

    Well yeah, but it’s not gonna happen as long as I’m living in this basement.

  460. Chief may be a prick, but he’s OUR prick.

    Did that come out ok?

  461. *takes Carin’s hand*

    *hums along*

  462. MPFS, I like you. I really do. So please, understand me when I say, Shut the fuck up.

    You wanna argue with MCPO, I don’t have a problem with that.

    Just find another place to do it please.

  463. I hate when I screw up italics.

  464. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3sQKLfmCDrU

  465. You wanna argue with MCPO, I don’t have a problem with that.

    Just find another place to do it please.

    Not to pile on, but I wholeheartedly concur.

  466. Sean, honestly, I was thinking that too.

    Sorry everyone. That “song” SUCKS!!!

    And the Catholic camp guidance counselor who made us all sing it can go to hell!

  467. Car in – That’s right sweetie, I’m YOUR prick. Now, make me a sammich, woodja?

  468. *takes Carin’s hand*

    *hums along*

    *starts to get carried away by emotion, sways to the singing

    * sneaks look at Mare to see if she’s getting ready to throw anything.

  469. “Chief may be a prick, but he’s OUR prick.”

    Did that come out right?

    Yes, yes it did.

  470. No problem. Consider it done.

  471. MCPO is way too big to be my prick.

  472. Did you see the A and E Goodfellas special Scott? They interviewed that actress. She really started hitting the bottle after The Sopranos.

    The gravy bottle.

  473. *starts to get carried away by emotion, sways to the singing

    This is why I only sing German speed metal. It’s like doing Tabata intervals when you sway.

  474. I hate that kumbaya song. Throws pig poos.

    Stupid hippies.

  475. Mare fires up the flamethrower and looks in Carin’s direction.

  476. Car in – That’s right sweetie, I’m YOUR prick. Now, make me a sammich, woodja?

    Soon as I’m done singing, K?

  477. Dick, I want to make sure you read the last line of my Kumbaya comment. It’s kind of crucial to my feelings about it.

  478. Thanks Mare, I had to think about the baby monkey song to get the kumbaya shit out of my head.

  479. Chief may be a prick, but he’s OUR prick.

    Did that come out ok?

    “You’re my brother, and I love you, Fredo, but NEVER go against the family.”

  480. #

    Mare fires up the flamethrower and looks in Carin’s direction.
    #

    ….Someone’s singing LORD, Kumbaya ….

    I don’t think you know how to use that, Mare.

  481. HA! I’m sorry MJ….hahahahahaahah

  482. *starts to get carried away by emotion, sways to the singing

    *watches Car In sway

    *hums a little louder*

  483. I certainly don’t speak for everyone on this blog. But, I think I’ve figured out what we all can agree on:

    1. Booze is a good thing
    2. Carin deserves a ginger every Wednesday
    3. Rosetta’s taste in women runs to the bovine
    4. PJM is louder than an air raid siren

    Everything else is a matter for much discussion.

  484. MOM!!! PUPSTER HAS A BONER!!!!!

  485. Hey, Hostages should I ask for a kitten for Christmas?

    If I do, I’m naming her Rosetta.

    That’s a great idea for a name! Mr. L almost brought me home a cat today.

    Either way, I’m totally naming our next ferret Rosetta.

  486. Scott, don’t think I’m not going to check out who Karin Hill is…….

  487. I do deserve a ginger every Wednesday. I ask for so little.

  488. Wheel of Fortune just came one. Sohos’ comment about JD now makes a lot more sense.

    I think they call “her” JD because “Pat” was already taken.

  489. Take it as a compliment Mare.

    http://tinyurl.com/33nxfv8

  490. MY dogs are fighting. I have no idea why.

    I think it’s over food.

    Oscar’s biting Zelda’s head. I just yelled at him and he stopped and she ran to sit at my feet.

  491. Why does Imogen Lloyd Webber keep showing up on Fox? I’m yet to detect any particular expertise or even rhetorical strengths in her absurd number of appearances.

  492. HMMMMM, he said Karin Hill not the actress who played her.

    More research needs to be done.

  493. The Victoria’s Secret Show is on. I wondered why it got so quiet.

  494. Leon – Blond, hot and a famous father. Apparently that is all it takes these days.

  495. I’m still here, Mare.

    Because it isn’t time for the show here yet.

  496. I’m watching another Detective Inspector Frost mystery.

  497. I presume that’s some Brit thing, MCPO?

    How good is it?

  498. Brad – I really like it. Frost is an anachronism in a modernizing police force. Lots of now-famous Brit actors who were just starting out at the time as well.

  499. Mare, Goddammit!

    *hums Kumbaya in head…

  500. Nice pic:

    http://tinyurl.com/3y9cgrf

  501. I’ll look for it, MCPO.

    Nobody does a good mystery like the Brits.

  502. xBrad – I spent many month on end cutting circular wakes in surface of the ocean.

  503. OMFG

    Content warning, NSFW. Or anything else.

    http://is.gd/i1vX0

  504. I’ll presume you’ve seen Prime Suspect?

  505. xBrad – “A Touch of Frost”

  506. Bedtime.

  507. I found it. I just need to find a good download.

  508. JEEZ, LAURA!!!!!

    Have you no shame?

  509. It was important. I wanted to warn you guys before you saw it on the news later on your own.

  510. Laura, is dirty, filthy, dirty, filthy, sick, dirty.

    (But I meant that in a nice way.)

  511. Okay, so I’m watching the Victoria’s Secret show (my first time) and the “dialog” makes me want to stab xbrad in the thigh with a fork.

    Man these girls make super modes sound DUMB. One twit starts crying when she gets her first pair of “wings.”

  512. They LOVE the crotch shots in this show also. Obviously showing the excellent stitch detail on the panties.

  513. Content warning, NSFW. Or anything else.

    disgusting.

  514. When I watch shows like this, instead of making me dumber, why can’t they make me skinnier and hotter.

  515. bleah, the camerawork on Victoria’s Secret needs work.

  516. Obviously showing the excellent stitch detail on the panties.

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

    I never watch that show. Now, I’m somewhat intrigued.

  517. New poat that we can all agree on without Mare screeching Kumbaya.

    Or Not.

  518. Whose turn is it to kill BiW?

  519. Okay, so I’m watching the Victoria’s Secret show (my first time)

    Of course it is, sweetie.

    *pours Mare a drink while pretending not to notice marital aids on side table*

    They’re all whores, you know. Stupid, stupid whores who will never amount to anything and are destined to a life of ruin.

    *does a shot*

    Nope. NOTHING for them. Nothing.
    Fucking whoooores.

  520. Alright, a decision has been made, when I grow up, I’m going to be a super model. Jet set around, drink champagne, do photo shoots on beaches , however, I’m a little concerned about the waxing necessary to pull this off.

  521. hahahahahaha….Really, I’ve never watched one. Why? I think bringing my girls to volleyball practice kept me busy weeknights.

    SInce the girls are gone, I do a lot of crap I’ve never done before, like nothing.

  522. Content warning, NSFW. Or anything else.

    http://is.gd/i1vX0

    You are so fucked up.

    *retches

  523. Who is mpfs? I keep getting the newbies confused


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