Explained

“Now that we’ve been rescued from Rosetta Amin’s basement, whaddya say we go get a shitload of drinks at the airport lounge to celebrate?”

“Okay, but let’s hit the Duty Free Shop first. Those big-ass Toblerones are cheaper there than they are at Costco. “

“You’re an asshole.”

“Right back atcha.”

“You know, I’ve never really been a fan of Total.”

“I’ve never felt closer to anyone.”

202 Comments

  1. This poat is the worst thing since Atilla the Hun.

    (And he was pretty bad.)

  2. This poat is the 4,547th best poat evah!

  3. Poor little lonely poat.

    I see I missed the fun last night.

    Oh, but I had so much more fun that all of you. I got to drive four hours in a car to spend the day with my mil.

    Oh, was that fun.

    There was not much to do, so I ate.

    so pleased with myself today.

  4. you can email me pics car in,
    I will tell you how hot you are.

  5. Just ask xBrad to forward that pic of my ass.

  6. Fine Bunch of Friends I got here. You coulda told me the alarm clock wasn’t set.

    Bastiages…

    *** Puts Coffee on Counter ***

    Off to Port Fourchon catch a mouse….

  7. http://www.telegraph.co.uk/earth/environment/climatechange/6683770/GPs-should-offer-climate-change-advice-to-patients.html

    This is so inherently retarded, I have no idea what more to add.

  8. This is so inherently retarded, I have no idea what more to add.

    How about ‘STFU, you hosefucking howler monkeys.’

    You can add that to anything, even a nice Chablis.

  9. Speaking of hosefuckers, where’s Rosetta?

  10. http://www.telegraph.co.uk/earth/environment/climatechange/6683770/GPs-should-offer-climate-change-advice-to-patients.html

    This is so inherently retarded, I have no idea what more to add.

    How the fuck did the semi-recent ancestors of people this silly ever rule the earth.

  11. I guess question marks are not a part of my tool kit today.

  12. http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/6671012/Man-with-sexual-fetish-for-slurry-jailed.html

    Hotspur:

    I think we found Rosie

  13. Yep, that sounds like they caught him – again.

    He also made the news here:
    http://tinyurl.com/yafjwa5

  14. or this

  15. Here PG ???????????

    Have some of mine?

    I have extra?

  16. I wasn’t around for the poat last night, but that photo of Car in in her snuggie thing is hot!

  17. http://cache.gawker.com/assets/resources/2006/10/frank%20the%20shitter.jpg
    or this

    “This man shit on the floor of my kitchen on October 6th, 2006 and then peaced.”

    WTF

  18. Morning, tards.

    Been off the inner-tubes for the past week (it was heavenly). Anything important happen?

    Car in in a snuggie? I don’t believe it. Did you see that they have them for pets now?

    And PG, here are a few more – we had leftovers at Thanksgiving??????????

  19. Last night on Jeopardy:
    http://tinyurl.com/y9aajkn

  20. Anf Chief – nice avatard. Didn’t know they had color film when you were that young.

  21. Google “worst failure ever” and take a look at the top result.

    \o/

  22. AD – That ain’t me. As you know, the world wasn’t in color until 1968.

  23. Hotspur, if I had a snuggie like that you could be sure I’d wear it.

    I’m always cold.

  24. Last night in the comments I linked that video of Cindy Sheehan and the Code Pink sluts getting confronted by the old soldier. The video unfortunately has since been removed.

    However I left a comment on the video last night that the soldier exhibited much more class than I would have as I would have beaten the crap out of the Code Pink America-hating bitch and happily served time for having done so.

    This morning I had an email response from the person that posted the video. Here it is:

    “Thanks for being so Amerikkkan, amigo!”

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! WRITE SOME NEW MATERIAL, YOU HIPPIE!!!!

    That was a good way to start my day.

  25. I’m always cold.

    And here I was thinking that you were a warm and caring person, despite what Bob says. :-)

    Actually, you and my wife (who is approx. the same age as you). We have a constant struggle when we take long drives together, getting the environment in the vehicle to the point where we’re both comfortable. At this point, I make sure I take off my coat before getting in, otherwise I’ll roast.

  26. “Thanks for being so Amerikkkan, amigo!”

    *sigh

    See? See what the public school system has done to people’s spelling abilities? sheesh

  27. Thanks for being so Amerikkkan, amigo!”

    Cause obviously the only people capable of commiting violence are klansmen.

    That’s why our prisons are full to the brim with crackas.

  28. That was a good way to start my day.

    I have to get out more – I have not run into any Code Pinkers in my daily travels. Pissing off one of them would definitely improve my day.

  29. Google “worst failure ever” and take a look at the top result.

    sean m

  30. Here’s the solution agile dog: Always drive in such a direction that your wife is on the sunny side and you’re on the shady side of the car. Works for me.

  31. The Hondurans just elected Pepe Lobo as their president. Pepe Lobo may be the coolest name for a president EVER. Congratulations Pepe and Honduras.

  32. Politics Code Pink is showbiz for ugly people.

    — Stuff Jefferson Said, 3rd ed. revised

  33. “Thanks for being so Amerikkkan, amigo!

    De nada, dickface.

  34. Code Pink is a commie front organization. I can assure you that had Cinders Shitcan pushed that megaphone in my face, she would have lost 4 of her remaining teeth. Fucking whore.

  35. Code Pink is showbiz for ugly people.

    **checks calendar for next Code Pink rally in a desperate effort to get laid**

  36. pjm did you get my email?

  37. Morning. Why does Sean hate us so much that he’s willing to inflict this poat upon us?

  38. pjm did you get my email?

    lemme check

  39. Always drive in such a direction that your wife is on the sunny side and you’re on the shady side

    But that would head us to Canada, or worse (shudder) Michigan! Can’t. Do. It.

  40. I learned that Michigan is the only state which makes Canada south of us

  41. I responded sohos darlin

  42. Why does Sean hate us so much

    What do you mean by “us”, cracker? It’s you he’d kick in the poon all day long.

  43. http://polijamblog.polijam.com/?p=11617

    Slow Joe Biden, best politician evah!

  44. I didn’t say there wouldn’t be complications. I ended up in El Paso one time when I meant to go to San Antonio. But my wife was nice and comfy during the trip basking in the sunshine.

  45. I learned that Michigan is the only state which makes Canada south of us

    What is, “Facts Mesa tries to impress sohos with?”

  46. Morning. Why does Sean hate us so much that he’s willing to inflict this poat upon us?

    It’s not so much that he’s inflicting it on us, as it’s really the best he can do. It’s Sean.

    Someone will make a real poat after we shovel this one up.

  47. she would have lost 4 of her remaining teeth

    Cheif, I think you are being generous – I think that skeezy whore lost all of them munching on the disease-infested vajayjay of Medea Benjamin years ago.

    Sorry to the ladies here, that was rude, but I have no stomach for those twits.

  48. I missed my exit last night in the pouring rain taking the grandkids home. I could see Cathy & Michael’s house from my window.

    Wish I”d had a snuggie.

  49. Sorry to the ladies here, that was rude, but I have no stomach for those twits twats.

    FTFY

  50. Chief:

    This is how I respond to the Pinkos
    http://tinyurl.com/ykbs4cw

  51. PattyAnn, you could have dropped in on M&C. And stolen Michael’s snuggie.

  52. PartyAnn – My little avatard is blowing kisses at you!

  53. Hahaha, brad. I don’t want a zebra-print snuggie. Or a hot pink one.

  54. I learned that Michigan is the only state which makes Canada south of us

    Sohos, I don’t know what the person was smoking who told you that, but it makes no sense.

  55. I think you’d look pretty good in a hot pink snuggie, PA. But Michael would be pissed.

  56. I missed my exit last night in the pouring rain taking the grandkids home. I could see Cathy & Michael’s house from my window.

    Which house is theirs?

  57. It does Hotspur something about Michigan being higher than a certain area of Canada.

    Counts’ Mom got me a snuggie last week. It is animal print. I LOVE IT!

  58. I could see Cathy & Michael’s house from my window.

    Who is, Sarah Palin?

  59. Counts’ Mom got me a snuggie last week. It is animal print. I LOVE IT!

    How’s she doing sohos?

  60. This one, PG

    The house you posted is the one I was coming from

  61. I learned that Michigan is the only state which makes Canada south of us
    Sohos, I don’t know what the person was smoking who told you that, but it makes no sense.

    if you stand in Grosse PoInt, Windsor is due South of you.

  62. PJ, are you playing Jeopardy? Alone?

  63. Sohos, but so are Maine, Vermont, New Hampshire, Massachusets, Rhode Island, New York, Pennsylvania, Wisconsin, Minnesota, Iowa, North and South Dakota, Nebraska, Wyoming, Idaho, Washington, and Oregon.

  64. She is doing as well as can be expected going through the first holidays etc.

  65. oh sorry I guess my little factoid was wrong

  66. Oops, okay, I get it now.

  67. PJ, are you playing Jeopardy? Alone?

    What is, YES?

  68. She is doing as well as can be expected going through the first holidays etc.

    Yeah, that’s what I was thinking. It’s got to be hard. Such a great man. So sad. :(

  69. I really just dont know enough about those yankee states I apologize

  70. Thank you PJM

  71. we have the pattern patty ann

  72. What is extraordinary nut snack.

  73. Gahhhh!!! There are not enough question marks today. Who’s hoarding them.

  74. Sohos, did you buy the pattern? I’m going to make the grandkids one for Christmas and I was looking for fleece and a pattern.

  75. I got in trouble once for using to many one time so I try not to use them these days

  76. Personally I think this blog should go punctuation free like when BiW posts

  77. Sohos, Grosse Pointe is a suburb of Detroit. Windsor is Detroit’s sister city in Ontario.

    So, you were correct.

    Detroit is actually NORTH of Windsor, and thus to the north of Canada.

    Grosse POinte illustrates it better, though.

  78. No, sohos, your fact is right. There are portions of Michigan that are due north over Canada, as Car in so wisely pointed out to me.

    **blows apologetic kiss*

  79. Counts’ Mom bought the pattern and she made one and it was more expensive to make than to buy the knock off ones for 7.99. They are not trademark snuggies but same dang thing.

  80. What is extraordinary nut snack.

    HAHAHAHA!

    I remember hearing that commercial for the first time and thinking WTF?!?!

    you have a pattern for snuggies sohos? That would be fun.

  81. i declare today no punctuation day

    no caps either

  82. okay so we ll just type like teenagers and college kids

  83. why does Sohos need a snuggie? Isn’t that what two weiner dogs, Count and Mesa are for?

  84. **blows apologetic kiss*

    rubs it on hiney walks off whistling ;)

  85. “more expensive to make than to buy”

    until they make a princess or camo snuggie im shit out a luck

  86. speaking of weiner dogs what did you guys do with wiserbud

  87. I agree! and better b/c they are home made. I think she bought the pattern at Jo Annes

  88. i declare today no punctuation day

    no caps either

    well thank gawd, my hands were getting tired

  89. Does this mean some taint-licking pedantic butt wipe can’t fault me on my placement of commas

    If so I’m all for it

  90. shoot i used a comma

  91. OMG! The wiener dogs are in soooooooo much trouble. They destroyed their blanket and my back yard looks like a winter wonderland with fluff shit EVERYWHERE! It is a damn mess and it rained this morning UGH! We have been trying to remember for days to get the rake from Counts’ Mom but we keep forgetting. My yard looks like hell.

  92. thanks sohos ill try to find it

  93. Counts’ Mom bought the pattern and she made one and it was more expensive to make than to buy the knock off ones for 7.99.

    Polar fleece is really flippin expensive.

  94. sorry I didn’t get the memo in time

    I’ma a little afraid to go without punctuation and capitalization because i’m pretty sure my 3rd grade teacher will rise from the grave and smack me with a ruler

  95. but the fleece they use to make those are the suck

    polar fleece is expensive but it will be warmer and a better quality

    you should see the special stuff i used when i made cloth diapers for my youngest

    it served as the waterproof outer layer

    it was that good

  96. You think you can whip up another batch of diapers soon

    MCPO is getting due for a change.

  97. HOLA!!!!!! Happy Monday!

    I’m just on my way to pick up lunch… Turkey pot pie. Deviled eggs. Two kinds of root beer. Peanut butter pie for dessert!

    WOOT!

    BBIAB to eat my delectable comestibles!

  98. how can you be angry at wiener dogs

    http://tinyurl.com/ybt33ys

  99. Jazz – Just knock it off with the punctuation

  100. Windsor, Ontario is actually on a peninsula that is due south of Michigan. I don’t think anything like that occurs elsewhere.

  101. nice buns

  102. PUNCTUATE THIS!
    An English professor wrote the words
    “A woman without her man is nothing”
    on the chalkboard and asked his students to punctuate it correctly.
    All of the males in the class wrote:
    “A woman, without her man, is nothing.”
    All the females in the class wrote:
    “A woman: without her, man is nothing.”

  103. Hotspur’s weiner needs some mustard. And chili.

  104. A SNUGGIE IS A ROBE WORN BACKWARDS!!!

  105. welcome to 12:45 michael

  106. it is real hard to be angry at the cutest dogs on the planet

  107. evidently i was wearing a snugie last time i had surgery

    didnt feel particularly snuggley at the time

  108. hahahaha Mare yes, yes it is. I put mine on like a robe and wrapped it around me so it wouldnt be so close to my neck.

  109. i just lie around naked

    its way mo betta

  110. What is extraordinary nut sack?

    I totally misread that and thought you gals were talking about Rosie O’Donnell’s.

  111. LINGUISTICS
    A linguistics professor was lecturing to his class one day. “In English,” he said, “A double negative forms a positive. In some languages, though, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative. However, there is no language wherein a double positive can form a negative.”
    A voice from the back of the room piped up, “Yeah, right.”

  112. Hahaha, Mare–I’d never buy green one, then!

    Sohos, I found a free pattern (child size, too).
    http://compendiumsearch.googlepages.com/snuggleuptoasnuggietypeblanket

  113. “A woman: without her, man is nothing.”

    You lie!! No one knows how to use colons properly.

  114. i declare today no punctuation day

    no caps either

    to which i say OUTLAW!

    and chief
    Does this mean some taint-licking pedantic butt wipe can’t fault me on my placement of commas

    If so I’m all for it

    what part of no caps dont you get (since I cant school you about comma today)

  115. crap i slipped and messed up didnt I

    and this is way harder to do than trying to do proper grammar and punctuation

  116. Oh that is awesome patty ann!

  117. this poat is turning into a sewing circle

  118. No one knows how to use colons properly

    i have never had to be taught how to use my colon – it functions perfectly well without any instructions

  119. You lie!! No one knows how to use colons properly.

    surprise buttsecks?

  120. i have never had to be taught how to use my colon – it functions perfectly well without any instructions

    colon blow

  121. this poat is turning into a sewing circle

    better than a circle jerk but i see cuffy just showed up and hotspur is already dressed for the party

  122. colon blow

    huh

    sounds like a gay porn star name

  123. Good morning. How’s my favorite bunch of weinerdog abusers this morning? Hope everyone got fat, drunk, and stupid during Thanksgiving.

  124. Hope everyone got fat, drunk, and stupid during Thanksgiving.

    Yessir!

  125. PattyAnn?? NOOOOOO!

    http://tinyurl.com/ydspfaw

  126. Hope everyone got fat, drunk, and stupid

    I just had to drink a lot to win that trifecta.

  127. Hope everyone got fat, drunk, and stupid

    It’s a helluva way to go through life, son

  128. Cuffy?? NOOOOO!
    http://bacn.me/elr

  129. patty ann that is the weirdest deal that they kill those albinos for body parts etc. I watched a special on it once and those people are CRAZY

  130. All cultures are equal, sohos. Report for reeducation

  131. Google “worst failure ever” and take a look at the top result.

    Fuck Google. Look at the result for that search now.

    How many years did they leave up the google-bomb result of Bush for the search “failure” or whatever it was? But they fixed this one in fucking minutes?

  132. I did it and the top result was a pic of obama

  133. albinos taste delicious

  134. IF I made a snuggie for Dave, I would use this
    https://www.fleecelady.com/popup.php?id=3191

  135. albinos – the other white meat

  136. Ok, who’s gonna put up a new poat?

    I think we’ve ridden this donkey as long as we can.

  137. MOM!! CARIN WON’T GET OFF THE DONKEY!!!

  138. Sohos, feel free to tell me to fuck off, but are you back on the South Beach train?

    I need to get serious during the holidays.

    I ate all yesterday.

  139. I feel like loving sean m today

  140. OK, Imma gonna hafta track down whomever it is imma stealing wifi from and kick them in the poon for using their microwave so much

    Cant get a fucking signal just because you want your burrito warm? Use the damn toaster oven!@!

  141. I did it and the top result was a pic of obama

    I did it and three stories came up about how the evil Republicans had done it.

  142. patty ann that is the weirdest deal that they kill those albinos for body parts etc. I watched a special on it once and those people are CRAZY

    I love how the article says this problem is being ignored by the U.S.

    I’m confused. Somehow it’s racist to help these people. I haven’t figured out how, but I’ll get back to you.

    or not

  143. lol xbrad leaching inernets

  144. I feel like loving sean m today

    hang in there
    youll get over it
    its merely a passing pyschotic episode

  145. I did it and three stories came up about how the evil Republicans had done it.

    Now it’s the whole first page

    http://tinyurl.com/yhcklps

  146. dang, I know the article pattyann linked isn’t supposed to be funny, but it reads like a South Park episode

    I did it and three stories came up about how the evil Republicans had done it.

    that’s what I got as well.

  147. since they are albinos they are white

    so how is not helping them racist

  148. if you do google images however, Obama’s picture shows up

  149. I ate all yesterday

    So that’s what happened to it! I just thought I got too drunk to remember it.

  150. so how is not helping them racist

    I said helping them would be racist

  151. So that’s what happened to it! I just thought I got too drunk to remember it.

    HAHAHAHA!

    I was trying to work something out with that, but got distracted

  152. Comment by pendejo grande on November 30, 2009 1:09 pm
    Hotspur’s weiner needs some mustard. And chili.

    no one wants to pick this?

  153. I was trying to work something out with that, but got distracted

    shiny penny on the floor again?

  154. no one wants to pick this?

    and some buns……..that kinda hot dog wants buns

  155. shiny penny on the floor again?

    belly button lint

  156. Hotspur, I’m also using it-bay orrent-tay to download some TV shows.

    What can I say? I’m an asshole.

  157. didja sniff it, pj?

  158. didja sniff it, pj?

    Sniff it? I snorted it.

  159. xbrad gets lucky

    almost

    http://tinyurl.com/yfbbnvx

  160. That was hilarious hotspur!!

  161. Hotspur: re your weiner pic

    Evidently I left that fruit hanging a little too low.

  162. xbrad gets lucky

    almost

    That’s why I never wear white underwear.

  163. Boobiecons:

    .Y. flat boobies

    (.Y.) curvy boobies

    ( . Y . ) fat boobies

    ( o Y o ) medium boobies

    (.)(.) little boobies

    (o)(o) regular boobies

    ( O )( O ) big boobies

    ( ‘ ) ( ‘ ) perky boobies

    ( , ) ( , ) droopy boobies

    {.} {.} cold boobies

    ( @ ) ( @ ) hairy boobies

    [ _ ] [ _ ] android boobies

    ( $ )( $ ) silicon boobies

  164. (.) _ Nancy Reagan boobies

  165. that was harsh

  166. that was harsh

    Yeah, I know.

  167. Ok. Favorite song THIS WEEK from Them Crooked Vultures:

    Warsaw or the First Breath You Take After You Give Up

    Followed by

    Caligulove
    Gunman
    Elephants
    Bandoliers.

    Man, I love this album.

  168. sohos wiener dogs:

    http://tinyurl.com/5clpkb

  169. (o) (0)

    assymetrical bewbies

  170. i knew a girl like that once

  171. ( @ ) ( @ )

    Unfortunately — and very startling — I knew a girl like that once. Surprise!

    We broke up soon after I finally saw them. Ewwww.

  172. Crap. This goes $5 over the Secret Santa budget.

  173. Yeah, the (@) (@) was pretty much a nonstarter. Didn’t help that she turned out to be stalkerish. It took a while to get the point across that it was the very worst sex I’d had in my life and that the only reason I slept with her was that I was drunk off my ass and thought she was her hawt roomate.

  174. what is this secret santa you speak of?

  175. (+Y+) stripper boobs

  176. .) ( ) (
    ( o ) ( o ) granny boobies

  177. oops, this poat doesn’t like extra apaces

  178. (VYV) Madonna boobies
    (uYu) Moobs

  179. Which key to you use to make inverted nipples?

  180. Hey, is that Shim selling “Turdles” in the banner pic?

  181. Which key to you use to make inverted nipples?

    I found a B-Flat works best for me…..

  182. AD, if you’d look left, you’d see that it is Sean.

    Dumbass.

  183. Not everybody can work a musical joke into a thread about emoticon boobs. Well played sir.

  184. ( ☼ Y o ) Janet Jackson boobs

  185. We don’t really know what the other one looks like though do we?

  186. Who is this David Thorne chap and why am I just now finding him?

    http://tinyurl.com/5lzv5j

  187. <—- missing boobies

  188. ( ☼ Y o ) Janet Jackson boobs

    WINNAR

  189. Well played sir.

    Thank you, sir. Now if I could just understand WTF xbradtc was talking about, I would mock him some more. But I fear he is beyond comprehension.

  190. He’s frackin hilarious.

    YOu are just NOW finding him Cuffy because you were a Hostage SLACKER when we brought him up the first time.

    Let that be a lesson to you.

    Hotspur, Rosie is collecting names for a Hostage secret santa. Email him.

  191. ( ǿ Y ǿ ) Swedish boobs

  192. Cuffy – Simon’s Pie charts is awesome too.

  193. Ok, me and my skort are off to the gym.

    bbl

  194. Cuffy, look under the recent comments list and you’ll see a link to his pie chart e-mails.

  195. why am I just now finding him?

    Cuz you’re not smart enough to click on my links?

  196. New post unless you like rotting fish heads.

  197. Yes, I saw Thorne’s pie chart thing here — that’s where I first saw him. I was reminded of his blog by carin’s t-shirt comment.

  198. LAST!

  199. LASTEREST!


Sorry, the comment form is closed at this time.

Comments RSS