Sunday Autoschediastic Callipygian Post

Someone please Google “2 Girls, 1 Finger”, watch the video and report back on what it is.

I’ve posted this video in the past but here it is again because I love it.  For some reason that I can’t explain, it makes me laugh and laugh and laugh.  I bet the guy that made this is fun to party with.

Hey, whatcha watchin’?

506 Comments

  1. Numero uno!!!

  2. One Rosetta, One cup.

  3. Hahahaha. That (x) girls, (y) cups chart cracks me up.

    I want to know who it was that Googled 0 girls, 0 cups. HAHAHA!!!

    Two people Googled 7 girls, 3 cups. Probably wiser and wiserbud.

  4. Sadly, a bing image search turned up no results for Elke Tatona.

  5. OMG! Billy Mays died

    http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,529328,00.html

  6. Nathan, the cashew lover
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NiNZdTSH3-A

  7. Oh crap PattyAnn, I was just about ready to post that and ask Rosetta where he was this morning.

    Rosetta?

  8. sorry, beasn, i can delete my comment

  9. Hell, a good riff on Rosetta is worth something.

  10. Yes, Beasn?

  11. BILLY MAYS HERE!!!

    I”M DEAD!!!

    HOW THE FUCK AM I GOING TO SELL THE REST OF THIS OXY-CLEAN???

  12. He needs to go on the honorary Hostages page.

    NOW!!!

  13. Ooooh, creepy:

    “Mays was a passenger Saturday of a 737 airplane that had a front tire blow out, said spokeswoman Brenda Geoghagan.”

  14. Maybe I should be asking mesa where he was this morning and then contact that ‘minutes’ gal and tell her to lock her doors.

    K…later…back to decorating some cakes.

  15. Watchu talkin’ about, beasn?

  16. Well, wife wants the front steps painted.

    Yay!

  17. Looks like Beasn is back on the crack.

  18. Ramones documentary-good
    Heroine-bad http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wMD7Ezp3gWc

  19. EVB-make sure SHE cuts in the edges first and get her a new roller. Good, done, go have a beer.

  20. http://www.lep.co.uk/weirdnews/Man-rescued-from-lift-twice.5408574.jp TBOM and an elevator?

  21. TBOM and an elevator?

    Tbom doesn’t know how to ride a bike. I wonder what he was doing with it?

  22. http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=82f_1246168540

    Is this an optical illusion?

  23. Jew:

    Do you really want to know?

  24. Funny guy. Newest edition
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1XunezwEKHk

  25. I COME NOT TO BURY BILLY BUT TO PRAISE HIM!

  26. What happened to Billy? Heart attack? Someone kill him cuz they couldn’t take it anymore?

  27. I just painted a black stripe on my can of oxi-clean

  28. EVB comment: 1:26 Wife wants me to paint step
    l
    l
    l
    l
    V
    EVB comment:1:42
    Eddie’s wife: “Edward, you get your ass outside and paint the steps,NOW!!!!!!”

  29. Billy Mays died:

    http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,529328,00.html

  30. totally deeed

    http://money.cnn.com/2009/06/28/news/companies/bily_mays_dead/?postversion=2009062813

    mesa, I have a computer question if you’re around. I installed a new hard drive on my computer yesterday. My graphics card is installed on the motherboard and windows xp is not recongnizing it. So I looked up what it was, it’s an ATI Radeon x3000 se. ATI doesn’t carry drivers for them anymore. Any recommendations?

    I’m thinking I should prolly just go buy a new graphics card and install it, but I wanted something for right now because Fry’s is like 40 minutes away

  31. x300 or x3000

  32. I’m thinking I should prolly just go buy a new graphics card and install it, but I wanted something for right now because Fry’s is like 40 minutes away

    Why don’t you stick the Windows fetzer valve up your gigantic motherboard then rub your Radeon x3000 on your dirty RAM interface while you suck on your fat color rod.

    That should fix it.

  33. Its about time somebody CROSSED THE LINE!

  34. Try rebooting.

  35. MOM!!!! TBoM KEEPS CROSSING THE LINE AND THEN SHOVING IT UP HIS ASS!!!!!!

  36. Is it plugged in? Try plugging it in.

  37. <em<MOM!!!! TBoM KEEPS CROSSING THE LINE AND THEN SHOVING IT UP HIS ASS!!!!!!

    and if anybody knows about shoving things up their ass…its Rosetta’s mama

  38. TBoM, did you watch the video of Bert and Ernie going BRUTAL?

  39. You forgot the ball bearings. Guys, guys! It’s all ball bearings nowadays.

  40. make sure one of your kids didn’t crawl in there and fall asleep on the motherboard….

  41. You forgot the ball bearings. Guys, guys! It’s all ball bearings nowadays.

    If anyone knows anything about balls, it’s Dave.

  42. TBoM, did you watch the video of Bert and Ernie going BRUTAL?

    yes, that shit never gets old, even though you have posted it over a thousand times

  43. What about plugging it in? Did you try plugging it in?

  44. you guys have to take the poll…its very important

    http://crossedtheline.wordpress.com/2009/06/27/biw-constipated-or-getting-fisted/

  45. shit…Hanz woke up

    bbl

  46. yes, that shit never gets old, even though you have posted it over a thousand times

    Hahahaha. Fuck you, honkey.

    http://tinyurl.com/yqdggr

  47. Its about time somebody CROSSED THE LINE!

    STFU and go back to sucking your mom’s dick.l

  48. I bet Franz punched him.

  49. Check the filter. Sometimes rodents get up in there and fill it with seeds and bits of fluff.

  50. What color skort are you wearing right now, laura?

  51. It’s probably a tumah.

  52. Why don’t you stick the Windows fetzer valve up your gigantic motherboard then rub your Radeon x3000 on your dirty RAM interface while you suck on your fat color rod.

    That’s hawt.

  53. already rebooted it dave.

  54. Nah.
    Track pants, black w/white stripes.
    One wishes to look sporty while being a couch slug on Sunday.

  55. Who here thinks Billy Mays prolly had high blood pressure?

  56. ok, I’m gonna go make me some breaky. When I get back, I expect me to be funny, or else!!!

  57. Hey, I have high blood pressure. That kills you at fifty?

    fack.

    *keeps takin the pills.

  58. Who here thinks Billy Mays prolly had high blood pressure?

    Har. That’s what I thought.

    One wishes to look sporty while being a couch slug on Sunday.

    I can relate you lazy POS.

  59. Is it plugged in? Pajama momma, you should try plugging it in.

  60. Let’s take a poll.

    Should I have cocktails and tie one on while I make fun of you or should I remain firmly ensconced on the wagon?

    Please cast your vote.

  61. Tie one on and make fun of Wiser.

  62. Okay, polls are closed.

    The motion to have cocktails passes unanimously.

  63. Hear hear!

  64. I love democracy.

  65. Let me know if you want some porn that will make you spit that cocktail out of your nose

  66. VH covers ZZtop
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XNqjCCX57jU

  67. The motion to have cocktails passes unanimously.

    But I didn’t get to say “aye”?!?!

  68. Let me know if you want some porn that will make you spit that cocktail out of your nose

    OH ME!! OH ME!!! PICK ME!!!!!!!

  69. Let me know if you want some porn that will make you spit that cocktail out of your nose

    2 girls, 1 finger??

    Will someone fucking watch that already and do a review?

    Who’s the pledge around here? Shim?

    Shim, go watch 2 girls, 1 finger. Tell us when you’re done.

  70. There are no actual Van Halen vids on YouTube.

    That’s a bunch a muhfuckin’ bullshit.

  71. DAMMIT!!!! Gavin locked us in the garage again. I freaking hate that.

  72. NEWSFLASH

    Family of 39 locked in garage for 3 weeks; ate shoelaces, poo to survive.

  73. 2 girls, 1 finger??

    Will someone fucking watch that already and do a review?

    I only made it to the 52 second mark before puking

    I highly suggest watching it.

  74. Hahaha. Did you really watch it, TBoM?

  75. Hahaha. Did you really watch it, TBoM?

    Not the whole thing…I couln’t do it.

    Two chicks sticking each others fingers down their throats and puking into each others faces. That wasn’t the worst

    Then one squatted and shit in the other ones mouth….that’s where I draw the line

  76. I think I need to sign off and go to church now

  77. I only made it to the 52 second mark before puking

    You’re describing two girls one cup, not two girls one finger.

    I really, truly vomited when I saw that video. I couldn’t watch the whole thing either, but I sure had fun randomly sending it to relatives with no warning.

  78. Two chicks sticking each others fingers down their throats and puking into each others faces. That wasn’t the worst

    Then one squatted and shit in the other ones mouth….that’s where I draw the line gibber gibber gibber.

    Thank the good spirits. My brainthought filter is functioning.

  79. What’s the “1 finger” part? Or did you not get that far?

    Are these the same psycho chicks that were in 2 girls, 1 cup?

  80. You’re describing two girls one cup, not two girls one finger.

    nope…I googled 2 girls one finger and got these two Japanese chicks puking and shitting on each other

  81. What’s the “1 finger” part? Or did you not get that far?

    I think its because one sticks their finger down the other chicks throat to make her puke, and then relishes in her friends half digested lunch

  82. nope…I googled 2 girls one finger and got these two Japanese chicks puking and shitting on each other

    Oh well, how nice. I guess there’s two videos out there like that.

  83. I will not,taint tonguer. I have a weak disposition for the puke.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hLEMfivxZII

  84. nope…I googled 2 girls one finger and got these two Japanese chicks puking and shitting on each other

    Is your opinion that they were whacked out of their minds on crack or heroin or something or do you think they’re just fucked in the head?

    I also wonder on the spectrum of sicko porn, what’s worse: farm or poo?

  85. Anyone want any basil?

    We have a basil plant that’s apparently on “the juice”.

    Basil Bonds.

  86. I also wonder on the spectrum of sicko porn, what’s worse: farm or poo?

    In my sought after opinion, I’m gonna have to say poo is sicker. At least with farm you can pretend you’re with a woman, there ain’t no pretending with poo.

    SERIOUSLY!!!!!! WHAT IS WRONG WITH THOSE PEOPLE?!?!?!?!

  87. you gimme basil, I’ll make pesto

  88. Is your opinion that they were whacked out of their minds on crack or heroin or something or do you think they’re just fucked in the head?

    seriously? there is a look on one of the chicks that is heartbreaking. There is a shot of her face where you can tell she is in a place in life that is hopeless and shameless, a look of a lost child wondering how she ended up in such a place of desperation….

    then of course she gets puked on

  89. SERIOUSLY!!!!!! WHAT IS WRONG WITH THOSE PEOPLE?!?!?!?!
    They’re pesto lovers.

  90. then of course she gets puked on

    HAHAHAHAHAHA!

  91. I have no fucking idea what you people are talking about, but I’m drinking a cold beer out by the pool.

    Yeah. I said that.

  92. I have no fucking idea what you people are talking about, but I’m drinking a cold beer out by the pool.

    I’ll be there in three days!!! Just.stay.there.

  93. Let’s all go drink DaveIT’s beer by the pool.

  94. So, I get off the plane to Germany, to start a 3 year tour there. I’ve got visions of quaint villages with the local gasthaus as the center of conviviality, beer and bratwurst. Lederhosen, buxom blonds that look as wholesome as a diary ad.

    I clear customs and go to the bus stand to catch my shuttle to the base. There’s a pron shop in the airport. With a giant poster, facing out into the hallway.

    Shit Lover’s Paradise. #26.

    We weren’t in Kansas anymore, Toto.

  95. seriously? there is a look on one of the chicks that is heartbreaking. There is a shot of her face where you can tell she is in a place in life that is hopeless and shameless, a look of a lost child wondering how she ended up in such a place of desperation….

    then of course she gets puked on

    I wish someone would do a documentary on these chicks. What has to happen to you in your life that leads you down this road?

    This all reminds me of this song. The more I know, the less I understand.

  96. Shit Lover’s Paradise. #26.

    I think there’s a Weird Al Yankovich song about that.

  97. Speaking of shit…

    http://tinyurl.com/nodewc

    Somewhat surprisingly, SFW.

  98. I’ve got visions of quaint villages with the local gasthaus as the center of conviviality, beer and bratwurst. Lederhosen, buxom blonds that look as wholesome as a diary ad.

    I clear customs and go to the bus stand to catch my shuttle to the base. There’s a pron shop in the airport. With a giant poster, facing out into the hallway.

    Shit Lover’s Paradise. #26.

    Wow. That’s a serious let down. Much like your Mother feels when you visit.

  99. everybody inna pool

  100. Shit Lover’s Paradise. #26.

    Do I need to see Shit Lover’s Paradise #25 to know what’s going on?

  101. Much like your Mother feels when you visit.

    Don’t remind me. I’m going over there Tuesday.

  102. Wouldn’t it be “scheiss, nummer sechs und dreizig”?

  103. Do I need to see Shit Lover’s Paradise #25 to know what’s going on?

    Make sure you get the Director’s Cut.

  104. I like your Mom, xbrad.

    I like that she feeds you Armour Treet and makes you do shitty chores.

    Are you taking Sox with?

  105. Do I need to see Shit Lover’s Paradise #25 to know what’s going on?

    Better start with #1.

  106. DinT, there’s a lot of stuff in Germany that has advertising in Germish, a weird tendency to mix the two languages. Not just porn, but lots of stuff.

    English really is the universal language.

  107. I’m wearing my new kickass pleated denim skort today.

    http://tinyurl.com/l94zq8

  108. Mom is not a Sox fan. In any way shape or form. And Sox is not a fan of riding in a car, in any way shape or form.

  109. OMG you dress like a whore.

    You get the pink spikes with clear heels to go with that, you filthy little minx?

  110. I bet Billy Mays could have sold skorts like hotcakes.

    HI! BILLY MAYS HERE!! DO YOU LIKE THE COMFORT OF SHORTS AND THE ATTRACTION OF A SKIRT? WELL NOW YOU CAN HAVE BOTH!!!! IT’S A SKIRT!!! IT’S SHORTS!!! IT’S SKORTS!!!!

  111. You eat pork.
    With a fucking spork.
    People’s Court?
    Rules against your skort.

    Beat that, cowboy legs.

  112. HI! BILLY MAYS HERE!! DO YOU LIKE THE COMFORT OF SHORTS AND THE ATTRACTION OF A SKIRT? WELL NOW YOU CAN HAVE BOTH!!!! IT’S A SKIRT!!! IT’S SHORTS!!! IT’S SKORTS!!!!

    HAHAHAHAHA!! Well done.

    I could totally seeing him selling that.

    CALL NOW AND WE’LL THROW IN 12 SPORKS!!!!

  113. Hail Rosetta,
    fancy poetta,
    can’t do no bettah,
    so fuck you very hello.

  114. OMG you dress like a whore.

    OH NO YOU DINNIT!!!!

    *snap*

    Jealous much, track pants?

    That’s right.

    I said it.

  115. I see no one can beat my mad skort rhyme.

  116. Hail Rosetta,
    fancy poetta,
    can’t do no bettah,
    so fuck you very hello.

    BOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

    – 100 points

  117. *Peeks in*

    *Determines the afternoon’s key discussion points.*

    *Turns and flees room.*

  118. Rosetta the boar
    Dresses like a whore.
    He sits all alone
    And screams ‘Leave Brittney alone!’

  119. Hey Dave, what the weather in Tejas?

    Hot as the sun or merely hot as a mofo?

  120. “Billy Mays here. Hey, wait a minute. I guess I’m not now. Shit!”

  121. Just flirtin with 100 today, not quite as bad as yesterday (104). I heard there was rain in the forecast this week. I also heard Obama is a card carrying member of the John Birch Society.

  122. Rosetta the boar
    Dresses like a whore.
    He sits all alone
    And screams ‘Leave Brittney alone!’

    BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

    What kind of lazy shirtless jackass rhymes “alone” with “alone”???

    BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

    – 1,097 points

  123. I heard there was rain in the forecast this week. I also heard Obama is a card carrying member of the John Birch Society.

    Hahahaha.

    RACIST!!!!!!

  124. hey fuck you, my poem was THE BALLS man.

  125. What kind of lazy shirtless jackass rhymes “alone” with “alone”???

    My wit is devastating in its subtlety.

  126. Jew, did you watch Bert and Ernie Go BRUTAL?

  127. My wit is devastating in its subtlety.

    Hahahaha. Oxymoronix.

  128. Now what should we talk about?

  129. BILLY MAYS HERE FOR STIFFPIKLER EMBALMING FLUID! STIFFPIKLER IS SUPER CONCENTRATED AND SUPER ECONOMICAL!! ONE BOTTLE OF STIFFPIKLER CAN BE USED TO PRESERVE THE CORPSES OF THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE!! CREATE YOUR OWN SECRET UNDERGROUND CITY OF THE DEAD IN YOUR VERY OWN BASEMENT! LET ME SHOW YOU JUST HOW EASY THIS IS!!

  130. I don’t know if any of you watch “Reliable Sources” with Howie Kurtz on CNN but Dana Millbank and the toolbar hack from Huffington Post that coordinated his press conference question with the White House almost came to blows this morning.

    It was quite entertaining.

  131. ‘Sup, Gheytards??

  132. too soon?

  133. I love brutal Bert and Ernie. Cracks me up every time.

  134. Ok I’m soaking wet and feel a million percent better now.

  135. too soon?

    I wonder why Billy Mays didn’t have a career reading BOOKS ON FUCKING TAPE!!!!

    Skort ryhme, laura?

  136. too soon?

    Yeah.
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    OK, now.

  137. Rosie:

    Milbank has been catching a lot of shit from Mediamatters for going after the last press conference. This sissy slap fight today would have been expected.

    Oh, and my steps look a ton better. Just hope we don’t get any snow or ice until I move out.

  138. FUCK!!!! I’m more upset about BILLY MAYS HERE!!! than I am about the dead pedophile.

    I think he deserves his own RIP Poat and Honorary Hostage status.

  139. Aloha Snackbar, motherfucker!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q8fX0sCVIUk

  140. Roses smell good,
    violets are weeds,
    Rosie wears skorts
    to satisfy sick needs

  141. I love brutal Bert and Ernie. Cracks me up every time.

    Hahahahaha. Me too. I like the fact that it’s not 30 or 45 seconds. 2:30 of that is partly why I think it’s so funny.

    Plus at around the 1:40 mark there is a little break that cracks me. That video should be annoying as hell but for some reason it’s really damn funny.

  142. I think he deserves his own RIP Poat and Honorary Hostage status.

    I agree and I’ll do that later. He does deserve a tribute post.

    I mourn the passing of any non-pedophile human and therefore I mourn Billy Mays’ passing.

    I am glad that he won’t yell at me anymore however.

  143. Told you not to fuck around, didn’t we???

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v7zKPfmSKj0

  144. there once was a man named Rosetta
    whose back hair resembled a sweater
    he liked to dress up
    in short skorts and pumps
    and violate an Irish Setter

  145. It’s like watching Neal Peart after a couple of ludes.

    Or not.

  146. Roses smell good,
    violets are weeds,
    Rosie wears skorts
    to satisfy sick needs

    Hmmmm……

    + 75 points.

    Would have been more but there was no vulgarity so you lost points cuz of that.

  147. IT WAS THE BEST OF TIMES, IT WAS THE WORST OF TIMES!! IT WAS THE AGE OF WISDOM, IT WAS THE AGE OF FOOLISHNESS! IT WAS THE EPOCH OF BELIEF, IT WAS THE EPOCH OF INCREDULITY, IT WAS THE SEASON OF LIGHT, IT WAS THE SEASON OF DARKNESS!!!!

    CALL NOW!!

  148. This is how we do it . . .

    http://tiny.pl/3vrq

  149. The more of you people I meet in real life, the less I feel comfortable with my old vulgar internet persona. Doesn’t that suck?

  150. OF ALL THE GIN JOINTS IN ALL THE WORLD, SHE WALKS INTO MINE!

    BUT WAIT THERE’S MORE. WE’LL ALWAYS HAVE PARIS.

  151. >> Doesn’t that suck?

    I’d call it bittersweet.

  152. Lauraw, she with hump
    Very slow witted, much like Gump
    Because of cankles, shuns the skorts
    But off dead hookers, blow she snorts

  153. LW if you put that stupid Masshole twang on your ode, Sweatta,Irish setta, It woulda been more betta. But I think you’re on to sumptin.HHmmm, letsee
    Flowers smell good
    so does my ass
    Vince is lacking
    Billy Mays’ class.

  154. Ok lemme get this straight, you’re judging the poems?

  155. IT WAS THE BEST OF TIMES, IT WAS THE WORST OF TIMES!! IT WAS THE AGE OF WISDOM, IT WAS THE AGE OF FOOLISHNESS! IT WAS THE EPOCH OF BELIEF, IT WAS THE EPOCH OF INCREDULITY, IT WAS THE SEASON OF LIGHT, IT WAS THE SEASON OF DARKNESS!!!!

    HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

    People would kill themselves before the end of War and Peace.

  156. WANNA KNOW THE SECRET TO A GREAT NIGHT’S SLEEP?

  157. THAT’S ONE SMALL STEP FOR MAN, ONE GIANT LEAP FOR MANKIND. BUT THIS WILL REMOVE EVEN THE MOST STUBBORN MOON DUST STAINS FROM YOUR BOOTS.

  158. The more of you people I meet in real life, the less I feel comfortable with my old vulgar internet persona. Doesn’t that suck?

    Really? Cut that shit out you ignorant, toothless slattern.

    If you think people like you because of your knowledge of fucking lillies, you are sorely mistaken.

  159. Can you imagine BILLY MAYS!!! reading you a bedtime story?

    Yikes.

  160. ONE FISH TWO FISH, RED FISH BLUE FISH. BUT NOTHING CLEANS UP A BLUE FISH LIKE THIS AMAZING CLEANSER!

  161. He was a comical character.
    A sunny ray of humor in the informercial world.
    Without him, we would have no OXYCLEAN! to remove the stains of Sox’s disapproval from our furniture.
    Without him, we would have no ORANGE CLEAN! to protect our wood cabinetry from Rosetta’s caipurnia stains.
    Without him, we would have no KABOOM!!! to rinse the stains from the bowl left by TBOM’s sushi bar aftermath.

    He was always happy to see us,
    And although his SHOUTING at us sometimes made Rosetta cry, and wet his pants,
    we knew he was always glad to see us,
    and we always had room for him in a comment thread.

    But most of all, we loved him for is ability to effortlessly demonstrate what real salesmanship looked like, as his enthusiasm and confidence, which will now light up the empyrean, simply outclassed any effort made by that littlle hooker fighting bitch, named VInce, selling the inferior product SHAMWOW!. Like us, BILLY MAYS HERE!! didn’t love his nuts, and he kicked them every time he stepped in front of a camera to make the Hostages’ lives easier.

    Rest in peace, Billy. We’ll keep slapping that silly bitch Vince around for you.

  162. TALE OF TWO CITIES!!!!

    WAR & PEACE!!

    THE SCARLET PIMPERNEL!!

    ROSETTA THE SKORT MODEL!!

    FROM WHICH ONE OF THESE BEST SELLERS DOES LAURAW QUOTE

  163. If you think people like you because of your knowledge of fucking lillies, you are sorely mistaken.

    No, I love her because she makes Wiser and Wiserbud cry like little girls.

  164. 私は持続する殺す。

  165. The main thing I hate about shamwow/ slapchop Vince is the offhandedly sarcastic and condescending shit he does that he thinks nobody notices, like tell me ‘you’re going to have an exciting life now’ because there’s gherkins in my tuna salad. Hey, FUCK YOU, Vince. There’s some grating accent he has too (New York?) that always makes me think HE thinks he’s a real con man, the smartest asshole in the room.

    Go stick your nuts in a Slap Chop and whale away, dickweed. I’m thinking that wasn’t the first time you were attacked by a disappointed whore.

    Billy might accidentally spit on me a little bit while he was shouting, but he would never insult me like that.

  166. Seeing BILLY MAYS!!!! bloopers makes me dislike him less.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9RyYcDh2EMY

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2SabRvYb0eE

    And you really can’t fault the guy. He was just trying to make a buck, allbeit at the expense of my hearing, so R.I.P. loud guy.

  167. Listen my morons,
    And you shall here,
    Of the mid-day poat of Rosetta’s cheer.

    Of cursing, and drinking, and mocking oh my!
    Of insults so vile they make sailors cry,
    Of ass pennies, potatoes, and dead hookers with blow,
    Of the saving power of Bacon and Bewbs,
    Of laugher, and comeradery, and gracelessness of FAIL!,
    Of villains and knaves well-met,
    Of farewells, and welcomes,
    Of food and weather,
    and the insults, oh, the beauty of the insults,
    The ability to draw blood without leaving a mark,
    To seemlessly join pain with laughter, and comtempt with respect,
    To make a family of old and young, male and female,
    And to create a home in the electronic ether for we few,
    we happy few, we band of brothers and sisters, clinging to a fading ideal and understanding of a proud nation, in the eclipse of a socialist star.

  168. Yeah. Vince is some sort of douche. BILLY MAYS!!!! wasn’t like that. He was just a yeller.

    I wish that the two of them would have run for Senate for the same seat. I would have paid big money to watch those two debate the issues of the day.

  169. BiW, the fuck is wrong with you?

    Go put some lipstick on your fist and don’t come back until you lose some intensity.

  170. Hey….quit writing my eulogy you jackass!!

  171. Go put some lipstick on your fist and don’t come back until you lose some intensity.

    SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTH!!! When I want your opinion, I’ll ask wiser and wiserbud to give it to you.

  172. MOM!!!! BIW WANTS ROSETTA TO DIE IN AUSCHWITZ!!!!

  173. Hey….quit writing my eulogy you jackass!!

    You’re right. We should be working on wiser’s,since he’s gonna die in a firey crash. What rhymes with “Daddy’s Fingers”?

  174. Someone please cross over the line.

  175. MOM!!!! BIW WANTS ROSETTA TO DIE IN AUSCHWITZ!!!!

    Actually, I figure if Rosetta doesn’t die in a bizarre accident involving a display in a liquor store, his last words will be “Hey! Watch this…”

  176. MOM!!!! BIW WANTS ROSETTA TO DIE IN AUSCHWITZ!!!!

    Hahahahahahaha. What the fuck is wrong with you?

    From L to R: the world, Jewstin’s humor

    http://tinyurl.com/n9u5ro

  177. Someone please cross over the line.

    If you don’t shut your piehole, I’m gonna tell PA you rubbed your privates all over her Cheetos.

  178. YESSSSS!!!!!!!

    I CROSED THE LINE!!!!!!

    WHOOO WHHOOOOOOO!!!!

  179. Funnier than the 3 people that Googled “0 girls, 0 cups” are the 7 people that Googled “1 girl, 0 cups”.

    Or the 375 people that Googled “0 girls, 1 cup”.

    Hahahahaha.

    Jewstin?

  180. BiW, fix me a new cocktail and I will consider letting you live to see tomorrow.

  181. Hey, whose turn was it to look after Honduras?

    What the hell.

  182. Billy Mays? Farrah Fawcett? Ed McMahon? Michael Jackson?

    Dead.

    Abe Vigoda?

    Still kicking

    The man is an immortal.

  183. MOM!!!! WISERBUD GOT OUT OF THE ATTIC AGAIN!!!!

  184. BiW, fix me a new cocktail and I will consider letting you live to see tomorrow.

    One urine-and-Draino special comin’ up.

  185. The man is an immortal.

    There can be only one.

    WISERBUD GOT OUT OF THE ATTIC AGAIN!!!!

    Garage, actually, and I’m heading right back in. Must get fuel lines finished today.

  186. Billy Mays? Farrah Fawcett? Ed McMahon? Michael Jakson?

    Maybe God needed a reality show. Cuz that is one right there.

  187. Billy Mays? Farrah Fawcett? Ed McMahon? Michael Jackson?

    Since you got them in order of importance, most to least, I guess I’ll have to say something nice about you in your eulogy.

    How about “He stopped beating his wife in recent years” or “After the scandal, broke, he personally called Senator Craig and told him “You can still get a wide stance in my bathroom anytime, Old Man.”?

  188. It’s really odd to lose that many icons in the course of a week.

    Stupid global warming.

  189. Garage, actually, and I’m heading right back in to bring pjmomma some beer. Must get fuel lines finished today

    edited for wishful thinking

  190. It’s really odd to lose that many icons in the course of a week.

    Stupid global warming.

    If we could just get Al Gore to stay home and shut his mouth…

  191. Good week for a couple of Senators to announce their infidelities I suppose.

    I wonder if Billy Mays starts another three.

  192. If we could just get Al Gore to stay home and shut his whore mouth

    because he truly is a whore

  193. Hahahahaha. That website that says Abe Vigoda is alive is hilarious.

    Poor Abe Vigoda. People have thought he was dead for 20 years.

    Fin FIsh.

  194. It’s really odd to lose that many icons in the course of a week.

    Stupid global warming.

    MMAAARRRREEEEE!!!!!!

  195. We need a Zombie Billy Mays

  196. WTF? I almost fell of my friggin chair. I coulda put an eye out or killed my shoulder again.

  197. And I can’t spel neether.

  198. Honduras is the shizzle! Good on the military for not letting a Marxist bastard trod all over them. FUCK ALL GODLESS COMMIE DOUCHENOZZLES!!

  199. Beasn’s Chair: http://tiny.pl/3v99

  200. We need a Zombie Billy Mays

    Hahahaha.

    Billy Mays leaves the scene
    We’re left with ShamWow!
    But God’s tub will be clean
    Who can resist, “CALL NOW!!!”?

  201. It’s really odd to lose that many icons in the course of a week.

    Good week for a couple of Senators to announce their infidelities I suppose.

    It’s a good week for a couple of senators to buy a farm.

  202. The more of you people I meet in real life, the less I feel comfortable with my old vulgar internet persona. Doesn’t that suck?

    Sorta. I’m just not motivated to think up a nasty hump joke, for example. Shucks, I danced with you (yes, that stumbling around is what I call “dancing”). Hump jokes seem pretty silly.

  203. Beasn’s Chair

    Don’t think so, MCPervO. Getting tied up would panic me to death.

  204. Beasn makes donuts,
    I happily report.
    But what’s with that icing,
    All over her skort?

  205. If we could just get Al Gore to stay home and shut his whore mouth

    If Maurice Strong would start his population reduction with his good buddy Gore, I’d be okay with that.

  206. Beasn doesn’t make donuts anymore. Beasn quit that job and is somewheres else decorating cakes.

  207. THAT’S ONE SMALL STEP FOR MAN, ONE GIANT LEAP FOR MANKIND. BUT THIS WILL REMOVE EVEN THE MOST STUBBORN MOON DUST STAINS FROM YOUR BOOTS.

    Hahahahahahaha!!! That one’s going around work tomorrow.

  208. Michael, you should audition for Dancing with Law Bitches. You have mad phat dancing skillz.

    I mean that seriously. Your repeated dipping of Mrs Peel was pretty good.

  209. Beasn doesn’t make donuts anymore. Beasn quit that job and is somewheres else decorating cakes.

    I know but I find that unacceptable. Donuts are better than cakes.

    Why did you get fired from the donut gig?

  210. Does anyone like wedding cake?

    I would rather suck a sugar-dipped cow’s teat than eat that crap.

  211. Roses are red,
    Violets are blue,
    touching rosetta’s pants makes the strongest person say
    “OOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWW!”

    I see you didn’t believe me.
    Here’s a tissue.

  212. Beasn – DON’T THREATEN ME!! You’ll think tomorrow is Wednesday once I pick your anorexic ass up and toss you into the middle of next week!

  213. *hands you a sugar-dipped cow tit.

  214. My wife is constantly watching wedding cake shows. I look at it, and I say” no wonder they charge thousands. You’re kidding right? For a FREAKIN’ cake?? It ain’t like beasn made it.

  215. Dancing with Law Bitches . . .

    Maybe alexthechick would be my partner.

    Technically, that was not a dip, it was a spin with Peelie spontaneously leaning way back at end of the throw. She gets all the credit for making me look good, whilst risking the possibility (and not a remote one) that I would lose my grip and let her bash her brains out on the floor.

    Hey, thanks for sending that picture. That turned out to be a great shot.

  216. Why did you get fired from the donut gig?

    I didn’t get fired. They were f*cking insane. No breaks or lunches AND they did not like that I was leaving and gave me a hard time the last few days I was there.

  217. AND we hit 102

  218. Beasn – Greeks or Italians?

  219. I don’t know how wedding cake became a tradition and I cannot believe how much some people pay for those things.

    Instead of wedding cake it should be wedding mac and cheese. It would be cheaper and everyone likes mac and cheese.

  220. Beasn – DON’T THREATEN ME!!

    Where did I threaten you, you senile goat licker?

    You’ll think tomorrow is Wednesday once I pick your anorexic ass up and toss you into the middle of next week!

    Do you know how to unfasten the seatbelts on your Rascal booster seat?

  221. Beasn- Never mistake the snark of this site for reality. I’m 6’3″ and 235 lbs of MAN!

  222. Instead of wedding cake it should be wedding mac and cheese. It would be cheaper and everyone likes mac and cheese.

    In three tiers, with different kinds of cheese, you know, cheddar, smegma, and formunda.

  223. hey did you get any of that lobster mac and cheese at Eli’s Rosetta? That shit was pretty good.

    Also, ouch on the tequila shots. You slept late. HAHAHA

  224. Does anyone like wedding cake?
    I would rather suck a sugar-dipped cow’s teat than eat that crap.

    Depends on who’s made the cake. If it’s a professional bakery and they made it on Monday for a Saturday wedding and are relying on the fondant to keep it from getting moldy, no. If it’s the daughter of a friend who made it the night before, yes please, and may I please take any leftovers home?

  225. Dave, what’s your water temp?

    I’m at 93 right now.

  226. Beasn – Greeks or Italians?

    Who? The owners of the donut shop?

    Inbred hoosiers* with a touch of Italian, I believe.

    (*white trash)

  227. 89. Perfect.

  228. Beasn- Never mistake the snark of this site for reality. I’m 6′3″ and 235 lbs of MAN!

    Yeah, what’s your point?

  229. 72. With a breeze.

  230. I’m 6′3″ and 235 lbs of MAN! ass potato refuse.

    There you go.

  231. I’m 6′3″ and 235 lbs of MAN!

    Bunk!

  232. Rosetta, I bought my wedding cake from MacArthur’s Bakery. They have some good cake. I was too busy making contact with everyone at the reception to really enjoy it.

    If I could do it all over, I would elope and order a small tier cake to enjoy in my skivvies while honeymooning.

  233. hey did you get any of that lobster mac and cheese at Eli’s Rosetta? That shit was pretty good.

    No because you retards ate it all before I got there.

    Also, ouch on the tequila shots. You slept late. HAHAHA

    The shots were good. And I was driving around for 30 minutes trying to find a place to park you jackleg.

  234. I’m 6′3″ and 235 lbs of MAN! ass potato refuse.

    There you go.

    One drunken moment accepting a dare to goatse, and you’re branded for life.

    DON’T YOU JUDGE HIM!!!!

  235. I’m 6′3″ and 235 lbs of MAN!

    Man with about 25 lbs of love handles.

  236. Do you know what is funny? My son is 6’1″ and 135 lbs of bone.

  237. Same friend’s daughter made the cakes for my kids’ First Communions, my husband’s 40th birthday, and a Black Forest cake with the cherry filling mixed with something alcoholic (kirsch something) that was awesome!!! She does real butter frosting, not the Crisco and sugar mess. Prices are accordingly higher.

  238. I’m 6′3″ and 235 lbs of MAN!

    Man with about 25 lbs of love handles.

    And 30 pounds of moobs.

  239. I’ve never disliked John Boehner but I’ve never really liked him all that much. I think legislators make poor leaders so I’ve never paid too much attention to him.

    He is an avid smoker which I like but other than that, not much to pay attention to.

    However….him calling that cap-and-trade rubber fist a “piece of shit” was excellent. His stock rose 30% on that.

    Maybe Republicans should be the party of vulgarity. Then I might run for office.

  240. 89. Perfect.

    Yup, high 80s is perfect. Low 90s is a leetle too warm. Mine will be high 80s tomorrow morning, but it gets full sun all day, and in this heat it warms up too much by late afternoon.

    Air temp at my house is currently 94.

  241. My son is 6′1″ and 135 lbs of bone.

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

    Beasn, you’re funny as shit. Are you sure you’re not a man?

  242. My son is 6′1″ and 135 lbs of bone.
    Mr. RFH is much the same. My grandfather, upon meeting Mr. RFH, looked him up and down and said, “Damn, boy, do you rattle when you walk?”

  243. Same friend’s daughter made the cakes for my kids’ First Communions, my husband’s 40th birthday, and a Black Forest cake with the cherry filling mixed with something alcoholic (kirsch something) that was awesome!!! She does real butter frosting, not the Crisco and sugar mess. Prices are accordingly higher.

    I don’t dislike cake. Just wedding cake. I’ve been to dozens of weddings and the cakes all suck.

    Hey Beasn, are you thinking about that guy with his weezer stuck in the tailpipe?

  244. Autoschediastic Callipygian Post
    Finally looked up what that meant. HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

    Autoschediastic = done on the spur of the moment
    Callipygian = adjective meaning shapely buttocks

    Day’s not a total loss, I learned something.

  245. No because you retards ate it all before I got there.

    Hah! It was at the far end of the table from me, and they finally passed it down to our end. Damn that stuff was good. Glad I got to pig out before you arrived.

  246. him calling that cap-and-trade rubber fist a “piece of shit” was excellent

    For real? Awesome.

    When Cheney told Leahy to go fuck himself, he got my undying respect. I would love to get a picture of me and him shaking hands – photoshop would work too – and send it as a Xmas card to my Obama-voting-Cheney-hating, father.

  247. Next person to comment on this thread has to wipe the ‘frosting’ off of Michael’s chin.

  248. Crap I am out of Booze
    Any one want me to pick something up for you?

  249. Autoschediastic = done on the spur of the moment
    Callipygian = adjective meaning shapely buttocks

    Hahahahaha.

  250. My son is 6′1″ and 135 lbs of bone.

    Beasn – Stop trying to emulate PJM. . . Be a real Mom and fix the boy a sammich, ferchristssake!

  251. Rosetta, she makes wedding cakes, too, but I’ve only had one. My wedding cake was pretty good, but again, a friend made it for me instead of a bakery. I had one bad wedding cake – that was one where it started molding under the fondant anyway. I hate fondant.

  252. “Damn, boy, do you rattle when you walk?”

    HAHAHAHAHAA

    Hey Beasn, are you thinking about that guy with his weezer stuck in the tailpipe?

    NO, but you obviously are. And f*ck you for bringing him up. Brrrr….

    Rosie, are you really tailpipe guy?

  253. Romy, I don’t even know what “fondant” is. Is that icing?

    When I got married everyone got a rum and mango cocktail. Fuck cake.

  254. Shim got stuck CROSSING THE LINE all by himself…that’s where we should exile douchebags

  255. The real problem with wedding cake is it causes so many women to lose interest in sex.

  256. Chief, he is 19. He can make his own sammich.

    Though, I did pack his lunch with mine when we were working the same hours.

  257. Shim got stuck CROSSING THE LINE all by himself…that’s where we should exile douchebags

    HAHAHAHAHA!!!

    CROSSING THE LINE is my second favorite blog in the world wide web tubes.

  258. HAHAHAHAHA!!! I think it’s entirely appropriate that this blog has a separate “time out” blog. hahahahaha

    DUNCE!!! CORNER!!!

  259. need to link it in the sidebar…and assign time on the blog for indiscretion

  260. The real problem with wedding cake is it causes so many wo men to lose interest in sex prematurely ‘finish’, then roll over and fart.

    FTFY

  261. TBoM, what is the extent of Hanz and Franz’s vocabulary?

    Are they to sentences yet or are they already past that?

  262. Cashew, lick my undercarraige,back and forth, you blog ignoring cock monkey.

  263. need to link it in the sidebar…and assign time on the blog for indiscretion

    Good idea, pacquoir d’fudge. Let me take care of that for you.

  264. TBoM, what is the extent of Hanz and Franz’s vocabulary?

    Are they to sentences yet or are they already past that?

    Everybody thinks their kids are brilliant…so its hard to brag and be taken seriously.

    Hanz is a little quiet. He’ll spout out a five syllable word out of thin air, but he sort of keeps to himself.

    Franz is a talking freak. Kid never zips it. He is really into animals, and can name everything at the zoo and in his bug books. Sometimes he freaks us out.

    We think they are some pretty smart little dudes.

  265. brb

  266. Yeah….

    Um, being smarter than TBoM, there’s an intellectual high bar…

  267. fix the boy a sammich, ferchristssake!
    If Beasn’s son is like Mr. RFH, it doesn’t do a damn bit of good. Metabolism like a hummingbird. He can eat half a pan of lasagna and a one-pound package of Oreos and not gain a single ounce.

    Can you hear the envy?

  268. Um, being smarter than TBoM, there’s an intellectual high bar…

    The following is a presentation of The Rosetta Community Theater:

    TBoM: Okay…now that Mommy has taught you how to tie your shoes, let’s see if you can tie Daddy’s shoes.

    *TBoM puts on those ugly tennis shoes with 2 velcro straps*

    TBoM: Who wants to show Daddy how to tie his shoes?

    Franz: Those shoes don’t have laces, Daddy. You can’t tie those. Those aren’t normal big person shoes. Why do you have those? Why does mommy cry when you come home?

    Hanz: Daddy is an imbecilic mooncalf.

    Fin.

  269. Actually roamy, my husband was that way. Then around age 35, he put on some weight and looks normal.

    The son never had a big appetite. He eats to live, though one vice he does have is milk. He goes through several gallons a week. When I was pregnant with him, I went through several gallons a week. He’s probably more like Mr. Beasn’s brother – body type and appetite-wise.

  270. I don’t even know what “fondant” is.

    If you ever watch Ace of Cakes, it’s the stuff they roll out to decorate the cakes with. It’s sugar and water and some filler cooked together to make something with Play-Doh consistency, and slightly less appetizing to eat.

  271. Stupid bird just shit on my laptop.

    brb

  272. Hanz: Daddy is an imbecilic mooncalf.

    HAHAHAHAHA. Poor TBoM. Velcro, huh?

  273. He’ll spout out a five syllable word out of thin air
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rqtr_RvR3sY

  274. If you ever watch Ace of Cakes, it’s the stuff they roll out to decorate the cakes with. It’s sugar and water and some filler cooked together to make something with Play-Doh consistency, and slightly less appetizing to eat.

    Ah. I know exactly what you’re talking about. It’s like a sheet. It’s looks good but not appetizing. Barf.

  275. I can’t believe no one Googled 4 girls, 3 cups.

  276. Beasn- Never mistake the snark of this site for reality. I’m 6′3″ and 235 lbs of MAN!

    His fat head makes up most of the weight.

    don’t think I didn’t see your sandwich comment

  277. OH BOB SAGET!!!!

  278. pajama momma, what are you eating right now?

  279. I am back with booze

  280. Who are the 1,461 people that Googled “6 girls, 1 cup” and what is wrong with them? That’s not enough cups.

    I need geoff to help me understand this data.

  281. PJM thinks that Newcastle, Ritz crackers and spray-on cheese is a 3 course meal.

  282. I do not know if it is a 3 course meal but it sounds good to me!

  283. . . . Newcastle, Ritz crackers and spray-on cheese is a 3 course meal.

    It’s not?

  284. It’s not?

    IT’S NOT IF YOU’RE TEN YEARS OLD!!!!

  285. What booze, Vmax?

    Your dog pictures on the last thread were awesome by the way. Normally I think that would bug but you’re such a good photographer, they’re very fun.

    Do you make any money with your photog skillz?

  286. PJM thinks that Newcastle, Ritz crackers and spray-on cheese is a 3 course meal.

    Don’t get classier than that, right?

  287. IT’S NOT IF YOU’RE TEN YEARS OLD!!!!

    Um, it IS if you’re 10 years old

  288. Speaking of Honduras, do you know what we need? A military coup.

  289. pajama momma, how did you get out of the garage?

  290. Speaking of Honduras, do you know what we need? A military coup.

    +100 trillion points!!

  291. Tushar commuting:

    http://bacn.me/8ba

  292. It is called appetizers when you are 20.

    Thank you Rosetta,
    25 years ago I made money shooting weddings.
    I have only been shooting digital for 4 years and 2 of them I did not shoot anything.

  293. I’m very serious Chief. Iranians need one and so do we. How’s about you retired guys joining forces and charge the halls of congress. Lock them all up, starting with the usurper.
    I’ll keep your pie moist and your powder dry.

  294. I have only been shooting digital for 4 years and 2 of them I did not shoot anything.

    Well buddy, you’re really fucking good.

    When H2 starts to make phat cash as an ongoing business enterprise and we can take our own pictures for BBF, you’re the man.

    The trips to Poland will kick ass. Bewbs and vodka.

  295. I’ll keep your pie moist and your powder dry.

    MOM!!!!!!! BEASN IS TALKING DIRTY ABOUT MCPO’S PIE!!!!!!

  296. Heheheh
    Cool.

  297. Beasn – I believe we are heading for a rebellion similar to the one described in Heinlein’s “Starship Troopers”.

  298. Tushar commuting:

    http://bacn.me/8ba

    That guy looks a lot like you. Except for the shirt I mean.

  299. OK retards, I’m gonna grill some orange roughy tonight. What should I put on it besides salt and pepper.

  300. Where is the Billy Mays tribute poat fer crissakes?!

  301. Mrs. BrewFan and I caught many catfish yesterday. Today, THEY ARE IN MY BELLY!!!

  302. Lemon pepper, or a orange apricot garlic glaze.

  303. Beer batter and deep fry them, xbrad.

  304. Not sure I have any of that, V.

  305. I didn’t know Romy was a cartoonist!?!

    http://tiny.pl/3vw9

  306. Garlic and sage.

  307. Rosemary and Thyme

  308. Fresh sage? that we have…

  309. http://tinyurl.com/nnv78q

    Beasn?

  310. Here is a question that I don’t want to look up the answer to.

    How was the nation of Chile formed? They have a HUGE amount of SA coastline for the size of the country.

    It’s like it was founded by an army of resort developers.

    Does anyone know that?

  311. Comment by Paul Simon on June 28, 2009 7:44 pm

    Rosemary and Thyme

    Hahahahahahaha.

  312. So I’m reading some crap on Jackson and his nanny, who supposedly pumped his guts on occasion, and there pops up the nation of islamic goat-humpers, again. Seems they were hangers-on squeezing the idgit out of his cash.

    Color me not surprised. Mohamma-ding-dong would be proud of his cult of modern day pillagers.

  313. How was the nation of Chile formed?

    1 tablespoon olive oil
    1 pound lean (10% or less) ground beef
    1 green bell pepper (seeded & chopped)
    1 chopped med. onion
    2 minced garlic cloves
    2 cups canned crushed tomatoes
    1/2 cup water
    2 tablespoons finely chopped jalapeno peppers
    1 tablespoon chili powder
    1 teaspoon ground cumin
    1 teaspoon salt
    1/2 teaspoon dried oregano
    1 (19 oz. can) chili beans
    6 tablespoons 2% cheddar cheese
    6 tablespoons chopped red peppers

    1. Heat the oil in a large nonstick skillet over medium heat. add beef and cook,breaking up as it browns, about 6 min.. Add the green bell pepper, onion,and garlic. Cook stirring, until the onion is translucent 3-5 min.
    2. Stir in tomatoes, water jalapeno peppers, chili powder, cumin, salt and oregano. Bring to a boil. Reduce heat and simmer, covered for about 30 minutes. Stir in beans: cook until heated through about 5 minutes.
    3. Serve in bowls or with tortilla chips, cheese, and red bell pepper on the side.

    servings 6 @ 1 1/2 cups each (W.W.6 points)

  314. Mira tonteron, nadie queria subir a las montanas!!

  315. Beasn?

    Yep, that’s me, though I don’t get to wear those nifty hats. I get a ‘bouffant’ hairnet thingie.

  316. Hahahahaha. BrewFan makeh teh funneh.

    Where have you been, fishhead?

  317. Oops, forgot the translation: “Look dumbass, nobody wanted to climb those mountains!!

  318. Brew – You don’t use venison?!?

  319. I wonder if the women in Chile know about skorts.

  320. Hey MCPO, how do you say “skort” in Spanish?

  321. Where have you been, fishhead?

    Basement finishing project. I had the framing, drywalling and electrical done professionally. I’m doing the rest myself. It doesn’t go so fast when you’re an old fart like me but it keeps me busy.

    Brew – You don’t use venison?!?

    No! I am not a fan of venison.

  322. Rosetta – “La Skorta”

    Brew – pansy-ass tree hugging faggot!

  323. What should I put on it besides salt and pepper.

    Butter flavored lemon pepper from West Texas with Chipotle, that’s what, and don’t argue with me.

  324. Dill and lemon slice wrapped in foil poached

  325. Brew – pansy-ass tree hugging faggot!

    I said I don’t like venison, I didn’t say anything about being in the Navy.

  326. Crossed the line is a major fuckin disappointment, Thanks Nate.

  327. I didn’t know Romy was a cartoonist!?!
    http://tiny.pl/3vw9

    HAHAHA!!!! He had a deathwish all right.

  328. It doesn’t go so fast when you’re an old fart like me but it keeps me busy.

    If you need someone to install light fixtures and accidentally tear down a huge chunk of your ceiling, let me know.

  329. Crossed the line is a major fuckin disappointment, Thanks Nate.

    DON’T TALK SHIT ABOUT H3!!!!

  330. Pffft…..

    I can fuck up your basement project for about half what that polesmoker Rosetta will charge you…

  331. xbrad, will you sign your card for me?

    http://tinyurl.com/nq6yka

  332. Vmax, what ya doin’?

    http://tinyurl.com/mqsmc8

  333. about that H3 thingy, Hey Rosie…
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0lYIdu5qLug
    the first ten seconds will suffice, thanks

  334. Vmax, what ya doin’?

    http://tinyurl.com/mqsmc8

    What an awesome picture. Those two are brothers in arms. No question.

  335. MCPO, whatcha lookin’ at?

    http://tinyurl.com/nbtoye

  336. Great show and the inspiration for The Venture Brothers!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_fYTA7bxqP4

  337. Johnny Quest was fantastic. I didn’t get to watch it very often though.

  338. *note to self — “Johnny Quest” cartoons are a reliable thread killer*

  339. Heheh
    What a complement

  340. *note to self — gay people like Johnny Quest, which explains its thread-killer properties*

  341. *note to self — gay people like Johnny Quest, which explains its thread-killer properties*

    *Corollary – IB if fucking DOOMED.

  342. *note to self — gay people like Johnny Quest, which explains its thread-killer properties*

    *Corollary – IB is fucking DOOMED.

  343. Doomed

  344. ‘Help us, Woman!’

  345. Has anyone seen my skort?

  346. Bring beers, immediately!

  347. What, I’ve got to pull your ass out of the fire again?

  348. Has anyone seen my skort?

    Ummm, I think Michael’s wearing it.

  349. Has anyone seen my skort?

    Denim or taffeta? Because, I think I saw the denim one hanging from the TV aerial.

  350. Oh, beer delivery. I can do that.
    http://tinyurl.com/npncel

  351. Tattoo and Romy, you each owe one rhyme about skorts.

    Whose turn is it to make me a cocktail?

  352. Intro THIS!!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xq0ZJgb-VX4

  353. Vodka and tonic with a slice of lemon and lime coming up!

  354. Oh, beer delivery. I can do that.

    http://tinyurl.com/npncel

    Jewstin, what’s the first thing that pops into your mind when you click on that?

  355. Oh, beer delivery. I can do that.

    Aww, crap. One of those bottles better have alcohol in it.

  356. Johnny Quest was fantastic. I didn’t get to watch it very often though.

    Jewstin, sometimes, just sometimes you scare me more than an epileptic hooker with a mouth full of metal who hasn’t taken her meds for a month offering free blowjobs.

  357. Skorts are pretty casual
    They lack a touch of class
    But the best thing about ’em
    Is you can check my ass.

  358. Rosie’s skort likes any storm in a port.

  359. I did not run an extensive search, but there are no brunette St. Pauli girls.

  360. Romy’s skort gave me a trouser tent!

  361. Vodka and tonic with a slice of lemon and lime coming up!

    NICE!!!

  362. Romy’s skort gave me a trouser pup tent!

    FTFY

  363. I did not run an extensive search, but there are no brunette St. Pauli girls.

    RACIST!!!

  364. Skorts are pretty casual
    They lack a touch of class
    But the best thing about ‘em
    Is you can check my ass.

    I think I’m in love.

  365. Skorts are pretty casual
    They lack a touch of class
    But the best thing about ‘em
    Is you can check my ass.

    Hmmmmmm…..+ 2,500 points even though there is no vulgarity.

    Rosie’s skort likes any storm in a port.

    *tackles Tattoo, performs massive wedgie, steals shoes, sells shoes on eBay*

  366. Ahoy, butt pirates!

  367. Romy’s skort gave me a trouser pup tent!

    MOM!!!!!!! MCPO IS GIVING PUPSTER WOOD!!!!!!!!!

  368. *tackles Tattoo, performs massive wedgie, steals shoes, sells shoes on eBay*

    Hahaha, tricks on Rosie. The only shoes TI has w/ her are her ragged ass, muddy as hell hiking boots, and her mud boots.

  369. Whose turn was it to kill Sean?

  370. Romy’s skort gave me a trouser pup tent!

    FTFY

    That would have been funnier if pupster had said the original line. I’m just saying is all.

  371. mud boots.

    GWARDAMMIT!!!!

  372. Tattoo, while Rosie is in mid tackle, grab his underpants and pull them up over his head backwards. He likes that.

  373. Whose turn was it to kill Sean?

    I think it’s actually my turn.

    *hangs self*

  374. There once was a shemale named Rosie
    In his/her skort he liked to mosey
    Around the block he went
    MCPO’s pants would tent
    And wiserbud’s ass gerbil got cozy*

    *actually wiserbud’s ass gerbil got nervous but that wouldn’t have rhymed

  375. Whose turn was it to kill Sean?

    *looks sternly at Tat*

  376. Whose turn was it to kill Sean?

    Oops. Shit.

    brb.

  377. *tackles Tattoo, performs massive wedgie, steals shoes, sells shoes on eBay*

    Hmmm, I’m suspicious as to why Dave’s wife has this “special” knowledge.

    BiW, but I like Sean. I don’t wanna kill ‘im.

  378. Tattoo, while Rosie is in mid tackle, grab his underpants and pull them up over his head backwards. He likes that.

    HAH!! Can’t get my underpants because I’m wearing a chastity skort.

    GRAB MY UNDERPANTS AND PULL THEM OVER MY HEAD EPIC FAIL!!!!111!!!

  379. BrewFan,

    I see you beat your latest solicitation rap.
    And those guys didn’t even beat you up that badly. I can still recognize you.

    I guess you get to call the weekend a win, huh?

  380. Uh huh

    http://tiny.pl/3vw2

  381. BiW, but I like Sean. I don’t wanna kill ‘im.

    Right back atcha tats.

  382. Whose turn was it to kill Sean?

    He’s in Cali, right?

    *Sets in motion a chain of events that will sink half the state beneath the waves.

    Sorry about the collateral damage.

  383. BiW, but I like Sean. I don’t wanna kill ‘im.

    You LIKE Sean??? That’s it. You CROSSED THE LINE!!!!

  384. SKORTS

  385. I think it’s actually my turn.

    *hangs self*

    Your attempts to get anyone to say that you’re hung will fail.

  386. SoHoS – whatcha looking at??

    http://tiny.pl/3vw8

  387. Sorry about the collateral damage.

    I’m cool w/ it.

    BiW, you know what I do w/ your line? I piss on your line. Stupid lines. I refuse to be bound by your narrow, rigid lines.

  388. *Sets in motion a chain of events that will sink half the state beneath the waves.

    Sorry about the collateral damage.

    For some reason, that gives me the mental image of Hagrid saying “Sorry ’bout that.”

  389. *Sets in motion a chain of events that will sink half the state beneath the waves.

    Can you sink the Northern half?

  390. BILLY MAYS HERE! CHECK OUT THESE SKORTS! THEY’RE A SKIRT, BUT THEY’RE ALSO SHORTS! YOU CAN TOTALLY CHECK OUT RFH’S ASS IN THESE THINGS, AND WHILE YOU’RE AT IT, LOOK FOR GARDENERS WEARING THEM EVERYWHERE! SKORTS!!

  391. Sean???

    http://tiny.pl/3vws

  392. BiW, you know what I do w/ your line? I piss on your line. Stupid lines. I refuse to be bound by your narrow, rigid lines.

    Well, then its a good thing you can’t move my big fat lines then. Take that.

  393. I guess you get to call the weekend a win, huh?

    You betcha. Life is good.

  394. Your attempts to get anyone to say that you’re hung will fail.

    I’M NOT IN THE CHINESE PHONEBOOK!!!

  395. Hot Damn! Steak and BJ night at the TBOM house

  396. I’m assuming y’all saw the thing where they found Billy Mays dead?

  397. Comment by BILLY MAYS: SKORTS ARE REALLY WHERE IT’S AT MAN on June 28, 2009 9:33 pm
    BILLY MAYS HERE! CHECK OUT THESE SKORTS! THEY’RE A SKIRT, BUT THEY’RE ALSO SHORTS! YOU CAN TOTALLY CHECK OUT RFH’S ASS IN THESE THINGS, AND WHILE YOU’RE AT IT, LOOK FOR GARDENERS WEARING THEM EVERYWHERE! SKORTS!!

    Sock puppet fail. Off to your penalty dance lessons with Batboy.

  398. Can you sink the Northern half?

    I was rather thinking the coastal half. Do I get partial credit?

  399. Hot Damn! Steak and BJ night at the TBOM house

    So the boyfriend came for a visit and you got to take the boys to a movie, huh?

  400. Brewfan – You should be ashamed!!!

    http://tiny.pl/3vwv

  401. Hot Damn! Steak and BJ night at the TBOM house

    Darn nice of you to invite xbrad over!

  402. I’m cool w/ it.

    Lemme finish dinner, OK?

  403. Hot Damn! Steak and BJ night at the TBOM house

    Looks like TBoM and wiserbud are having a meet up.

  404. I’m assuming y’all saw the thing where they found Billy Mays dead?

    HE’S NOT DEAD!!!! HE”S MEDITATING ON WAYS TO KILL THAT SHAMWOW!!! BITCH VINCE AND FEED HIM THROUGH A SLAPCHOP!

  405. Sock puppet fail. Off to your penalty dance lessons with Batboy.

    Dave?

    http://tinyurl.com/m6zryc

  406. O kay then.

  407. Bash away all you want losers…doesn’t change the fact that I got a an awesome fillet and my balls drained by a smoking hot Mrs. TBOM

  408. Where Brewfan gets his prostate exam

  409. I was rather thinking the coastal half. Do I get partial credit?

    I live inland, so knock yerself out. But I’d prefer it if you could get rid of Sacramento.

  410. My eulogy to Mr. Mays is further up the thread, Tat.

  411. TI did you receive the info?

  412. THAT’S RIGHT! THEY’RE NOT. BUT WITH THIS NEW OXY-BRAINSTEM PUMP THEY CAN BE NOW! TAKE ONE OF THESE TO YOUR NEXT DISCOVERY HEARING, PLUG IT INTO HIS NECK AND WATCH WHAT IT CAN DO! YOUR COUNSEL WILL CRACK YOU UP, GUARANTEED OR YOUR MONEY BACK!

  413. Ahh, good to know. I’ll get right on scrolling up and reading all of those important comments.

  414. doesn’t change the fact that I got mashed potatoes in my hair a an awesome fillet and screamed at my balls drained until I did the dishes by a smoking hot Mrs. TBOM

    For reality’s sake.

  415. doesn’t change the fact that I got a an awesome fillet and my balls drained by a smoking hot Mrs. TBOM

    This makes you different than thousands of homeless men how?

  416. Hi losers. I was here …. (counting backwards) 14 hours ago and no one was awake.

    I’m giving you a second chance.

    Anyone else think the Sham Wow killed Billy Mays? Anyone know where he was around the time of death?

  417. This makes you different than thousands of homeless men how?

    hahaha…touche

  418. Rosie – +2 points for making me snort.

  419. I did shim. Thanks! Trying to sort things out right now. It’d help if Rosie could make a decision 😉

  420. I just heard the word cocksucker 8 times between the 2nd and 3rd bites of my shrimp fra diavlo over linguine and I put to a motion that there be a Deadwood day on The Hostages.Anyone?

  421. Vince the ShamWoW guy was at Forrest’s place getting a S&BJ night.

  422. Comment by Rosetta on June 28, 2009 9:06 pm
    Has anyone seen my skort?

    I was wearing a skort earlier. You know what the beauty of skort is? Don’t need to wear underwear.

  423. What’s Deadwood?

  424. Carin, I’m pretty sure you can do that w/ an actual skirt too. Just in a different part of town.

  425. I just heard the word cocksucker 8 times between the 2nd and 3rd bites of my shrimp fra diavlo over linguine and I put to a motion that there be a Deadwood day on The Hostages.Anyone?

    Shim, you cocksucking cocksucker, why don’t you take your cocksucking self and go suck some cock with other cocksuckers who like to get their cocks sucked by cocksucking cocksuckers like you…

    ya cocksucker

  426. Jewtin – it’s a parable about the kindness of whores and cocksuckers from Yankton.

  427. Okay, I’m going to watch a flick. Please choose which movie I should watch.

    (A) My Wife, The Hooker

    (B) WIlly Wonka

    (C) The Bourne Identity

    (D) Other that you suggest

    Okay go.

  428. Vince the ShamWoW guy was at Forrest’s place getting a S&BJ night.

    I wish…I definitely could have used a shamwow to wipe her up

  429. Well, yes. Of course. I mean, I can dress like that around my kids. Garden and stuff.

  430. Car/in I demand reciprocity. Your blogging actions are dispicable.I went out on a limb, searched, linked(without fuckin up). This is big.

  431. What’s Deadwood?

    It’s what Mrs. Tbom found after dinner.

  432. TBoM I was in line but Mrs got to you first YAY!!Good fer u man, good fer u.

  433. What did I do, shim? Three glasses of wine consumed. TELL ME WHAT I MUST DO!

    Rosie – C.

    Personally, I”ve given up the tv for the summer. I’m just gonna read.

  434. Rosetta – 2 Sumos, 1 Bucket.

    According to the other blog, its your favorite movie

  435. What’s Deadwood?

    DON’T TALK SHIT ABOUT TBOM!!!!!

  436. Dave in Texas = Scientist

    Experts confirmed.

  437. Nate, if that show was still on, starring role, buddy, I coulda hooked you up, you had the script down, I knew the cocksucker that fought for Hearst. Fucking cocksucker was the 2nd director for Any Given Sunday. That cocksucker. Oh, suckyou.,poopyhead.

  438. Rosie – C.

    Good call, Car.

  439. Zeke with funky hair
    Zeke Center

  440. I’m pretty sure I haven’t turned my television on in two weeks. Thank goodness I don’t pay for it.

  441. Simple acknowledgement, Thank you, come again, I’ll be linking all week(hopefully w/o fucking up too much)

  442. Bourne Identity. Then go drive the hell out of a Mini Cooper until the wheels fall off.

  443. Throw a little fabric softener in there next time you put Zeke in the dryer.

  444. Someone keep scottw away from the booze and dead hookers.

    I’ll be back later.

  445. Zeke with funky hair

    he looks a little pie-eyed there V…I suggest hitting the bong when Zeke is outside

  446. Shim, I mean I’m lame. Where did you link? I’ve been offline all day.

    Please? I could search all night, but after the busy day I’ve had … shit, my eye is twitching.

  447. Shim, I mean I’m lame. Where did you link? I’ve been offline all day.

    Please? I could search all night, but after the busy day I’ve had … shit, my eye is twitching.

  448. If I were to buy a small car I think it would be a Mini Cooper. Everything else is chick or butch NTTAWWT

  449. More Zeke
    Zeke

    I went to m Brothers house today. His youngest has 3 Rabbits

    Emma LOVES Rabbits she spent 2 hours staring at them
    Emma Looking at the Rabbits
    and
    Emma Likes Rabbits

  450. If I were to buy a new car today, and it didn’t matter that all my kids didn’t fit … I’d get one of those Ford Flex cars. I lurv them. They’re kewel.

  451. Guessing it was a good thing to leave the rabbits in the hutch.

  452. It was last night 1am area, then I sent you there this morn, you masta left before it landed. Anyway, it was a tune for your wine request Fri. no biggie, now, I will not be ignored Dan.

  453. Zeke looking Right
    Zeke Right
    and left
    Zeke Left

  454. Oh, ok. Lemme go look. last night …

  455. Aww, my poor doggy has an ear infection. A few days of vinegar solution will clear it right up though.

    I don’t understand why she has to tidy up on the bed though.

  456. Vmax 6 cyl Mustang-no bailout company, nice car, I had one, wife has a GT.

  457. I like the Nissan Versa. The Ford Flex looks weird, and not in a good way.

  458. Car in, here it is.
    Comment by shim on June 28, 2009 12:41 am
    How bout a tune for Car/in? uguess I’ll have to toss it at her again. Just in case she’s watching from behind the curtin.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5irgYeDM2qU

  459. >> Please choose which movie I should watch.

    (A) My Wife, The Hooker

    (B) WIlly Wonka

    (C) The Bourne Identity

    (D) Other that you suggest

    I suggest you kill yourself.

  460. I. AM. AN AUTO. REPAIR. GOD!!!!

  461. I have not looked at the Flex close up It looks kind of big for a smallish car.

    Do not like the Versa Tattoo. or the Matrix Tin. Can.

  462. *shudder*

    http://tiny.pl/3vwz

  463. I. AM. AN AUTO. REPAIR. GOD!!!

    Congratulations. Blinker fluid doesn’t exist.

  464. Ha. That reminds me of college. All the gals in my dorm LOVED Def Leopard, while I was listening to the Smiths.

    No, I didn’t fit in.

  465. Hahaha Vmax, the Cooper’s not any bigger. I like the Versa ‘cuz it’ll pick up and GO.

  466. >> If I were to buy a small car I think it would be a Mini Cooper.

    I would buy another pickup truck because of my small dick.

    did I say that out loud? crap.

  467. Uhh Dave, a 4 door extended cab, long bed?

  468. Ha, MCPO – I still think that baby is cute.

    Sigh. I lurv babies.

    I got my husband neutered after 5, ’cause we got pregnant just about every time we had unprotected sex. I’d have prolly 10 by now if I hadn’t stopped up that leak.

  469. My Missus likes this little car: http://tiny.pl/3vw3

  470. TI, not the full doors in the back.

    I have some dignity.

  471. I have some dignity.

    Pretty sure not. And if you’re compensating, then you’re gonna need ’em.

  472. Hey Rosetta, you mentioned St. Pauli Girl beer.

    Do you know what St. Pauli is?

    Huh?

    It used to be the whorehouse district of Hamburg, Germany along a major street called the Reeperbahn (“reep” btw is pronounced as “rape”), It was immediately adjacent to Hamburg’s large harbor district where a zillion horny sailors came ashore from their duty on the Atlantic and North Sea.

    The Beatles practiced at clubs in St. Pauli, long before anyone had heard of them. When I was an exchange student there and going to those clubs in the mid-70s, I learned about this.

    I remember many years later being at the original Hard Rock Cafe in London, before they started franchising and there were a scores of them, when it was actually a cool place to be in London. They had a collection of rock memorabilia there was awesome, like a set of finger picks used by Eric Clapton, that Clapton had autographed when he walked by.

    They had a poster there from a St. Pauli Club which advertised “RORY STORM AND THE TROOPERS” in very large type. At the very bottom it said, “Auch, The Beatles.”

    So cool.

    Auch = Also

  473. My Missus likes this little car

    The Scion’s are pretty nice. A little on the “Fast & Furious: Tokyo Drift” wannabe side, but nice.

  474. I have a pickup truck Dave.
    But driving to work and back I do not need a PU. Love the V8 and the AWD. Hate the 12 MPG.
    I am not married to you so I do not care how big your dick is. As long as you stay away from me with it.

  475. I was pleasantly surprised by the power of a Mini-Cooper. They’ve got good acceleration. I shouldn’t have been too surprised, tho. They are made by BMW.

  476. My favorite German word is “Gestalt”.

    GESTALT GEFICKEN!

  477. Dishes done, wife is on her way from FL, Thanks RFH, that was nice of you, ankles shrink?

  478. My favorite German word is

    Autobahn

    Vroom, vroom.

  479. >> As long as you stay away from me with it.

    I never leave home without it.

    My Chevy is just a half ton, small block V8, I’m not towing shit. 4800 I think, we used to call it 302 back in the day. You know, when you and I were in our 30s.

  480. Yes the Scion’s are not a chick car and acceptable, but I know quite a few douches that drive them .

  481. Congratulations. Blinker fluid doesn’t exist.

    Wait…. what?

    DAMMIT!!!

  482. I like the Versa ‘cuz it’ll pick up and GO.
    Uh, Oh!

  483. I have a 20′ Grady White
    Need a 4WD for the steep ramps

  484. 302 war A Ford Engine I think 305 was Chevy

  485. Wiser, you should tow it to a shop where you can fix it up.

  486. Favorite German word?

    Bier.

  487. While I was taking Latin 4 in High school Xbrad my teacher was going to Germany and learning German. I remember Das hause is blau. and some other trivial shit.

    I might remember more German than Latin at this point.

  488. The reason Hard Rock Cafe became a sensation is that British rockers got used to American food when they were on tour in America, stuff like big cheeseburgers and apple pie. At the time, you could not buy that in London. The original Hard Rock Cafe got started in London when somebody decided to sell that food in England, and it became a super-cool destination because major rock stars would stop by, So, it became the cool place to be, because you might see someone famous.

    When I went there, it had a line half-way around the block just to buy their T-shirt, because the London HRC T-shirt was super-cool at the time. The stars did not go in the normal restaurant anymore, because it was full of tourists. There was a downstairs club guarded by a very big bouncer where the serious people could go. I was with a guy who talked us into that club, and that’s where I saw the Clapton picks and the Beatles poster and lots of other guitars and stuff that I have forgotten.

  489. I think we’ve exhausted my German vocabulary.

    I got to where I could read it pretty well, and could understand a conversation for the most part, if they spoke slowly, but could never speak much more than to order lunch.

  490. hause>

    Actually, “haus.”

    So fun to be a spelling Nazi in a foreign language.

  491. When I lived in NYC Michael I saw Clapton play at the village gate. And Carlton, and take 6, and a few others.

  492. I graduated in 79 Michael
    Spelling in German? Ha!
    Go a head and correct me I could not care.

  493. This OFF mosquito thingy works pretty good.

  494. Michael, don’t you have your own blog to suck all the funneh out of the web from?

  495. new poat because this one is slower than TI getting a joke.

  496. When I lived in NYC Michael I saw Clapton play at the village gate. And Carlton, and take 6, and a few others.

    I saw him live in Columbus about seven years ago. It was awesome. He has really matured as a vocalist, did most of his classics, plus an acoustic set, plus some of his “blues shouter” stuff. Great show.

  497. shim, ankles are near normal today, thanks for asking.

  498. Romy – If you’re here. . .

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PbSYwlxwotY

  499. Michael, don’t you have your own blog to suck all the funneh out of the web from?

    Yes. Yes I do.

    Why do you think I am here?

  500. new poat

  501. I mean, if I acted on my own blog like I do here, my Flag Counter would look like yours.

    BWAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

  502. Brad, you said “funneh” and “Michael” in the same comment.

    Go punch yourself in the face 500 times.

  503. Michael – It is a sad,sad, forlorn man that measures his worth by the variety of foreign idiots clicking on his blog looking for goat porn.

  504. foreign idiots clicking on his blog looking for goat porn

    That’s just not true. They are looking for a “Hello Kitty” pic and “The World’s Biggest Vagina.”

    Give me some credit for the quality content at IB.

  505. Wow, this sure died early.


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