Terrible Tragedy

Some poor guy was found dead at an auto repair shop this morning near where I live. He was removing a part from a minivan and the vehicle suddenly fell on him and he was crushed to death. Terrible. Terrible.

A man was crushed while trying to steal a catalytic converter from a minivan at an auto body shop at 286 Tolland St., police said.

Ohhh.

Nevermind!

HA HA HAAA HA HA HAAA!

Context is a wonderful thing.

[IMPORTANT UPDATE: YOUR MOM]

Sobriety test for Pupster:

I bought a pair of these for each of you nice ladies.

UPDATE TO THE LAST UPDATE: MCPO Airdale

Could this post be any gheyer?  Why, yes it could!

sanjaya

420 Comments

  1. First?

  2. Woo-hoo!!!

  3. Should I feel guilty that I think this is funny as hell?

    Nah.

    BWAHAHA HAHAHA HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

  4. That is funny.

  5. What a maroon! What an ultra-maroon!!

  6. The post needs to be tarted up, Hostages style. I don’t have any Hostages style of my own.

    If you want to append some pictures of fruit or silly people or a stupid video, please be my guest.

  7. Asshole criminal, meet instant karma. Instant karma, asshole criminal.

  8. This is my second post, Pupster!

    *beams with pride*

    *last tooth falls out*

    FUCK

  9. *GASP*

    When did Lauraw become a hot-sausage?

    NOTHING MAKES SENSE ANYMORE!

    *orders 8 more Jagermeisters*

  10. Well, I looked for a pic of someone crushed by a car, but they were all far, far too graphic. I was hoping for something funny or ironic. Nope.

  11. The post needs to be tarted up, Hostages style. I don’t have any Hostages style of my own.

    No shit, lazy woman. This horrible post looks like a piece of white bread in a snowstorm.

    MAKE POST INTERESTING AND FUN FOR ME TO STARE AT FOR HOURS FAIL!!!

    Now excuse me while I add some some crap to try and save this from being the worst post EVER!!!

  12. time stamp problems?

  13. FUCK YOU AND YOUR FUCKING UMPTEEN PIECES OF FLAIR, FAT MAN!!

    *DOUBLE MIDDLE FINGERS*

  14. xbrad,
    That lady you mentioned in the previous thread, the married one you were banging like a chimp banging a bongo, what did she look like?

  15. Mel Brooks

  16. Uni,

    5’10”, 135#, blonde hair, blue eyes, 36-24-36.

    She was 9 years older than me. We were together for about 5 years.

    She slept with Arnold Schwarzenegger once.

  17. Brad:
    So by extension, you slept with Ahnuld as well?

    That’s ghey!

  18. LAURAW – I fixed it for you!

  19. *throws up on bar*

    *calls in sick*

  20. xbrad,
    God bless you.

  21. She slept with Arnold Schwarzenegger once.

    I’m pretty sure that means you slept with Arnold Schwarzenegger.

    Homo.

  22. Eddie- Did you post insightful political commentary on DPUD today??

  23. So by extension, you slept with Ahnuld as well?

    No, but Ahnuld’s been fucking me hard ever since he was elected here…

  24. LAURAW – I fixed it for you!

    Hahahahaha. My update SUCCEED!!!! Your update FAIL!!!!!

  25. They shut down all the schools in our town because 3 kids may have swine flu. My kids are home today.

    Some enterprising guy decided it would be a good day to drive around the neighborhoods trying to sell ice cream and candy from his ice cream truck. What the hell, all the kids are home right.

  26. Which one of you assholes(Rosetta) dumped my update??

  27. What in the hell is going on?

    I feel like the WHite Larry Bird

  28. Brad:
    What you do on your free time is your own business.

  29. I know what it needs is Mares new rug pic

  30. FUCK YOU AND YOUR FUCKING UMPTEEN PIECES OF FLAIR, FAT MAN!!

    *DOUBLE MIDDLE FINGERS*

    Hahahahahaha!!

    Pipe Down Blandy Vanillapost.

  31. ^curtains as well?

    MAAARRREEEE!!!!1!

  32. I knew it was you!!!!

    http://tiny.pl/zp91

  33. Lance Bass is gay?

  34. Which one of you assholes(Rosetta) dumped my update??

    I didn’t dump or delete anything, MCPO. I promise.

    You must have forgotten what you were doing after you pooped you pants on your Rascal and then drooled on your Life Alert necklace and then fell on the floor in a puddle of your own urine after your dentures flew out of your mouth and then you broke your hip and coccyx.

  35. FUCK YOU, KYLE!!!

    http://tinyurl.com/d38qj2

  36. FIXED!!!

  37. Do you remember when we all used to be nice to each other?

    Yeah me neither.

    FUCK YOU!!!

  38. You must have forgotten what you were doing after you pooped you pants walked 18 holes on your Rascal golf course and then drooled on your Life Alert necklace had some lunch and then fell on the floor in a puddle of your own urine after your dentures flew out of your mouth and then you broke your hip and coccyx collected your winnings.

    FTFY

  39. Do you remember when we all used to be nice to each other?

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

  40. *looks at the floor*

    Faaaaack! Is that a tooth?

  41. Dave in Texas, tell us about the days when you used to live in Barney Frank’s basement.

  42. When did Lauraw become a hot-sausage?

    The same time she lost the last shred to human dignity to which she was clinging.

  43. Rosetta, I’m going to take your mother out for a nice seafood dinner. And I’m never going to call her again!

  44. Why does it smell like bat guano in here?

  45. Michael???

    http://tiny.pl/zp96

  46. Rosetta, I’m going to take your mother out for a nice seafood dinner. And I’m never going to call her again!

    MY MOM HAS A SEAFOOD ALLERGY YOU FUCKER!!!!!

  47. DiT???

    NNOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

  48. MY MOM HAS A SEAFOOD ALLERGY YOU FUCKER!!!!!

    Guess he won’t have to call her then, will he?

  49. MCPO, Joe Biden called. He wants his moustach back.

  50. He wants his moustach back.

    WTF?? Is that even in English.

    Su madre la llamaba, desea que su personal de seis-celled juguete nuevo!

  51. Engrish, motherfucka!Engrsih!

  52. In English: Your mother called, she wants her six-celled toy back.

  53. Remote controlled car?

  54. Remote controlled car?

    Ahhhhhh, no.

    http://tiny.pl/zpwt

  55. What do you have against single-celled organisms, YOU SPECIESIST!!!!!!

  56. Back massager?

  57. Back massager?

    Exactly!

    *pats Rosetta on the head and hands him a lollipop*

  58. Rosie:
    Chief is just upset that you couldn’t give him a Happy Ending with your massage

  59. I’m closing the shop a little early to go get a facial.

    Sigh.
    Here:

    I have been needing a facial really badly.

    I find facials relaxing and good for the complexion.

    Women who aren’t into getting facials just don’t know what they’re missing.

    There you go, lads! Enjoy! Like I will be enjoying my facial!

  60. Must. Resist…

  61. Too easy.

    Now, if you were closing shop early to take a two-hour shit at Jolly Pirate, we would have something more to work with.

  62. Ninja please, that’s like giving a cupcake to a monkey.

    Or some other equally stupid metaphor.

  63. Is a facial like a paraffin treatment for the face?

  64. I go and do important shit and Xbrad and Romy are hitting on each other like a couple of drunks at closing time. WTF?

  65. You know, Laura, I got a facial the other day! My husband was very satisfied with the results.

  66. When facials go wrong…

  67. Someone who knows spanish please translate this for me?

    Es cuando Usted esta encantado….

  68. I love facials Lauraw I try to get one every other month. Of course I havent been able to lately

  69. Folly, they closed my kids’ school today. I have more leave than hubby does, so I’m home today and tomorrow. Not only have they closed the schools, they closed the parks and have postponed softball games, a track meet, and hubby’s company picnic. The Manbirdpig flu is seriously pissing me off.

  70. It is when you are happy/delighted…

  71. the -ado ending tells us it is a past past participle being used as an adjective

  72. Thank you d-ling 🙂

  73. Sohita – It means: “It’s when you are happy.”

  74. Romy – Need someone to inspect your corpus for any stray flu virus?

  75. Thanks MCPO

  76. “I love facials ”

    *thud

  77. MCPO, bring some more Yuengling and we’ll see 😉

  78. Rich loves facials.

  79. Romy – Another Dark Porter or a Lager??

  80. Mmmm, let me try the lager, please. Alcohol kills flu bugs, right?

  81. LauraW?????

    http://tiny.pl/zpct

  82. ROmy – I’ve traveled around the world, lived in Britain and visited Belgium weekly for about two years – Yuengling Lager, on tap, is one of the finest beers I’ve ever tasted.

  83. MCPO, I find what beer I want depends on what mood I am in. There are times when I really want a Pilsner Urquell, other times I want a Guinness. I’m not consistent. Speaking of Belgium, the lambeck beers with the raspberries are an acquired taste.

  84. I now rarely drink beer except at the golf club. I drink vodka over ice with a twist of lime or 3 fingers of Irish over 2 ice cubes.

  85. It’s usually beer or wine for me, with the occasional Irish coffee. Too many Five Alive daiquiris in college.

  86. beer beer beer beer beer beer I WANT SOME!!!!!!!!!!!!

  87. Sohita – http://www.yuengling.com/beers.htm

    Love you!!!!

  88. I should have put that on my amazon wish list 😉

    Love you!!!!

  89. Ooooh, Little Feat. If you’ll be my Dixie chicken, I’ll be your Tennessee lamb…

  90. Romy, sorry to hear the Manbirdpig flu is screwing things up. We only have a couple of cases here and no one is freaking out about it.

  91. I’m drinking a beer right now.

  92. hi y’all

  93. I’m drinking a beer right now.

    AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  94. I have seen the bright lights of Memphis from the Commodore Hotel. . .

  95. hey vmax!

  96. I’m going to wash every inch of my glorious body. . . BBL

  97. Folly, that’s what’s driving me crazy. We have two unconfirmed cases and they’ve really gone overboard. When they had bacterial meningitis in one of the schools, they didn’t react like this.

    Hi Vmax!

  98. Yeah mass hysteria is a scary thing

  99. I’d be pissed if I were you, Romy. Nothing go on here. Business as usual.

  100. I’m either going to go cook dinner (meatloaf, mashed potatoes, peas, and fruit salad) or I’m going to scrub MCPO’s back for him. Take your pick, bbl.

  101. Hummmm Meatloaf sammies!

    I made Hamburger gravy and mashed potatoes for dinner.

  102. Hi Vmax.

  103. Ribeyes were on sale. Blackened one and half inch thick steak in the cast iron. Yum.

  104. I still can’t believe they canceled school in our town today, seems like an overreaction.
    They canceled pretty much everything for the weekend as well, churches canceled, social events like Prom are canceled.

  105. Where do you live Uni?

  106. Park City, Utah

  107. Hi Folly how is it going?
    You are on fire with your rants over at your place. Go Girl!

  108. How many cases there, Uni?

  109. Three but they are unconfirmed.

    Apparently we have a few kids at school with weakened immune systems, the super wanted to make sure they were protected.

  110. Unconfirmed as of this morning, I should say, hopefully they will find out over the weekend.

  111. http://www.parkrecord.com/
    Check out our local paper, it is a pretty big deal here, a real scare for a lot of people.

  112. You know, Laura, I got a facial the other day! My husband was very satisfied with the results.

    HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

    + 1,000 points for Carin despite the fact she can neither spell nor pronounce her name correctly.

  113. Gotta go, gonna eat a burger and fries.

    Have a good evening everyone.

  114. Gotta go, gonna eat a burger and fries.

    Do you think Tom Cruise will play you in the movie?

  115. Buffalo wings and fries!

  116. Thanks Vmax. Did you see my latest one? Obama’s speech in song?

  117. For Sohito, The bestest Fake Internet Girlfriend in the world!!!!

  118. Buffalo wings and fries!

    Your original or restaurant?

  119. Rosie – Homemade by my sweet baboo!!

  120. Buffalo wings are their own food group.

  121. Buffalo wings rock.

  122. If you don’t like buffalo wings, I don’t like you.

  123. If you ain’t sweating while eating Buffalo Wings, they need more spice!

  124. Everyone, at some point in their life, should make a pilgrimage to the Anchor Bar.

  125. I don’t like buffalo wings.

  126. Best wings (outside of home) I ever had were at a place called “Baxter’s on the Rotary” in Newport, RI. The were called, “Chernobyl Wings”. Sadly, Baxter’s is gone and all I have left are memories and a Tee Shirt.

  127. Pajama Momma = http://tiny.pl/zpdx

  128. I don’t like buffalo wings.

    *rethinks earlier statement*

    *confirms that it was correct*

  129. God gave me buffalo wings because He really, really likes me.

  130. Pajama Momma = http://tiny.pl/zpdx

    Hahahahahaha.

    At Mizzou there is a kickass wing joint called CJ’s. They have mild, medium, hot and BYFO.

    BYFO = Burn your face off.

  131. Dinner was ramen=not very yummy.

  132. There are three kinds of poeple:

    (1) wings with ranch

    (2) wings with blue cheese

    (3) wings with nada

    State your preference, please.

  133. Tattoo, if you put a slice of cheese in your ramens after you drain them, much better.

    Also, what shoes are you wearing right now?

  134. Three points:

    1. Emers Glue is the best thing for a facial evah!!

    2. Cancelling Prom might not stop the flu, but it will lower the pregnancy rate by 41.5%.

    3. Momma always said that we would have a black preznit when pigs could fly….now we got Obama and the swine flew. Mamma was right!

  135. “If you ain’t sweating while eating Buffalo Wings, they need more spice!”

    Me no likely. Me no likey cuz me likey to use snow cone for ass wipin’ tomorrow.

  136. nono,,,,,me NO likey to use snow cone

    talking like neighbor retard is hard

  137. Blue cheese. But they need to be dripping in buffalo sauce too.

    I insist.

  138. *calls 911 to to go check on KKA*

  139. HAHAHA. KKA reminds me why I call my chili recipe “the Afterburner”.

    heh.

  140. For the men — http://www.yaplakal.com/fun/siski.html

  141. The lady down the street from me was killed in a car accident this morning. Sad.

    She has a son – 30 y/o that comes into our business all the time to hang out. He’s schizophrenic – really bad. On a day that he hasn’t had medication, I leave, quickly. I guess he was in the car with her. Critical condition.

  142. Blue cheese

  143. Blue cheese. But they need to be dripping in buffalo sauce too.

    Hmmm. I am of the same school. Especially with good blue cheese dressing where you get a sweet rock of blue on the wing. Then all is right with the world.

  144. KKA, I’m sorry to hear that.

  145. For the men — http://www.yaplakal.com/fun/siski.html

    I’ll see you guys in an hour or so.

  146. I didn’t know her at all. My daughter had met her at the Post Office, but other than that, I wouldn’t know her if I met her on the street.

    or …you know, before this morning,,,,,,

  147. Blue Cheese or nada.

  148. an hour? yea, sure

  149. That’s still sad, KKA.

  150. Also, I was at the grocery store today and Danica Patrick is on the cover of some mag in a bikini.

    She lacks teh boobage but she is hot on fire like the heat of a billion blazing white hot suns.

    True story.

  151. Danica Patrick is a poison dwarf.

  152. Wow. All blue cheeses so far.

    We are simpatico.

  153. Tattoo, if you put a slice of cheese in your ramens after you drain them, much better.

    Ewwww!

    And ranch.

  154. count me in on the blue cheese – but I make my own, it’s the bestest. Also, please provide a strwberry snow cone on the side. I like my pretty pink pucker to have a rosy glow.

  155. Blue cheese on spicy wings.

  156. “She lacks teh boobage ”

    She does have to steer at 200 m.p.h., yaknow

  157. Yep. A hunka blue cheese in the dressing on the wing makes me as happy as a little girl.

    Also that link from mesa is fascinating. I never imagined a mouse pointer could be so interesting.

  158. “Mooncup ”

    that’s fuckin’ disgusting!!!!!!!!!

  159. That’s just nasty, Mesa.

  160. I’m bi-curious, wings with ranch on some days and on other days wings naked.

  161. Evening all,

    my delicate constitution won’t allow me to eat spicy foods, but I loves me some mild buffalo wings, dipped in bleu cheese, and chased by a good cold brew.

    Sorry to hear about your neighbor Annie,
    Agree that Folly has been on a tear with her rants/blog
    Laughed out loud at the mouse…tittie site

  162. Good doggie

  163. TG, I didn’t even know you had visited my site. Thank you.

  164. Re: Rosetta at 8:07 p.m.

    Rosetta, I take back every bad thing I ever said about you. You are my new best friend.

  165. Gah, I hate when a book seems really promising and then shits out in the last 30 pages. BTW, all seven books read.

  166. Hey Folly, how come I get knocked off the internet when I log onto your place with Firefox? You gots a bug in there?

  167. Folly, yer welcome… I visit all the blogs that are linked here.

  168. Rosetta, BiW told me to call you a flaming douchebag.

  169. Not that I know of, KKA.

  170. Tattoo, if you put a slice of cheese in your ramens after you drain them, much better.

    Ewwww!

    Are we talking chicken ramens or some bastard oriental beef bullshit?

  171. Ramen noodles.

  172. If I use IE, I have no problem, but FF kicks me off everytime. Tried the other day a couple times and again tonight. Me no likey the kickey me offey.

  173. How BiW spends his weekends: http://tiny.pl/zpdr

  174. Rosetta, BiW told me to call you a flaming douchebag.

    Who the fuck listens to BiW?

  175. Tat, did the author take the easy way out?

    Then the little girl found her mother and father and lived happily ever after!!!!!1111111eleventy!!!

  176. Yep, Folly , just tried again. Wierd, huh. And, it’s immediate. The second the page loads, I’m outta there. Something to worry about, I guess.

  177. PJM????

    http://tiny.pl/zpd9

  178. Ramen noodles.

    What flavor, Buttafuoco?!?! Or are you talking plain Jane ramens?

  179. That is one of them “white” Goldens, I told you, you gotta watch out for them!

  180. Rosetta, I take back every bad thing I ever said about you. You are my new best friend.

    *kills self*

  181. No idea, KKA. I use IE.

  182. Folly, yer welcome… I visit all the blogs that are linked here.

    And here I thought I was special.

  183. Folly – It’s works ok for me on Firefox

  184. Tat, did the author take the easy way out?

    Not really, just killed off the main character’s love interest, and then the main character ends up “becoming” the evil character she was fighting.

    What flavor, Buttafuoco?!?! Or are you talking plain Jane ramens?

    Roast chicken or something like that. I still wouldn’t put cheese on that. That’s just nasty.

  185. “It’s works ok for me on Firefox”

    oh shut up

  186. Rosetta, BiW says that, “EF Hutton went out of business because your client left you for him, that’s who.”

  187. Kornie?

    http://www.joeydevilla.com/2009/04/30/photo-of-the-day-5/

  188. Folly’s site works just fine for me on FF as well, KKA. Want me to just cut and paste everything into the comments here?

  189. Want me to just cut and paste everything into the comments here?

    Not so much.

  190. Is BiW hiding behind folly’s skirts?

    Gotta go start dinner.

  191. Mesa, very funny!!!! HAHAHAH….

    *just mosey along with my cobb and kernels…….*

  192. No-one said you weren’t special Folly, BiW dragged your (what did you call it amazing?) ass over here so you have that going for you.

  193. KKA – I read my missus your comment re: buffalo wings. . . she almost peed her pants!

  194. No, xbrat, that’s ok. I have IE,,,I was just concerned. Tried it several times….immediate removal.

    Folly hates me. That’s ok. Not everybody can love the Korn Queen.

  195. For Vmax:

    cuz I love you more.

  196. 2:11 on that YouTube. F.u.c.k.i.n.g. AWESOME

  197. “I read my missus your comment”

    HAH…glad I could make her laugh. I’m always talking about wiping with a snow cone…my kids get soooooooo embarassed.

  198. I don’t hate you KKA. I have no idea what the deal is.

    BiW is at the hospital with his mom.

  199. On Tuesday night at BW3 they have .30 cent wing night.

    RANCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  200. How BiW spends his weekends: http://tiny.pl/zpdrM.

    HAHAHAHAHA!!!

    Gothloaf.

  201. No-one said you weren’t special Folly, BiW dragged your (what did you call it amazing?) ass over here so you have that going for you.

    Really? Awwwwww.

  202. KKA – That Youtube is from Chrissie!!!

  203. “is from Chrissie!!!”

    huh??

  204. Yes, my ass is amazing. Sorry it’s true.

  205. Thanks KKA

  206. MCPO thanks for the cool tune earlier!

  207. Tell BiW we hope his mom is doing OK. Is there anything they need?

  208. Chrissie = Wild Thing = Blog Mistress of Theodore’s World.

  209. Tell BiW we hope his mom is doing OK. Is there anything they need?

    I’ll let him know. She’s having surgery on her ankle.

  210. Folly, tell BiW to stop calling and soliciting cornhole sex from xbrad.

    XBRAD LIKES ANIMALS!!!!

  211. Sohita – You are welcome, dulcinea mio!

  212. OH, yea, I see that now. I got it in an email…..so I clickey it.

    I ‘ve never been to Theodore’s World until tonight. Why? Why? did I not know about it? Why?

  213. Pictures Folly,
    I am a very discerning judge of fine ass

  214. So, why is TAT popping in and out and not hanging around?

  215. what’s this?

    We’re gonna have a Hostagette Ice Cream Cone Eating Contest?

    1st Annual HICCEC?

  216. I have one Vmax just ask PJM. She couldnt keep her hands off it while she was here 😉

  217. Joe Biden should be standup comedian.

    That guy is funny as a motherfucker.

  218. Pictures Folly,
    I am a very discerning judge of fine ass

    I wish I had photos.

  219. *starts exercising tongue*

    *la la la la, lu lu lu lu, lick, lick ….this is hard*

  220. “She couldnt keep her hands off it while she was here ;)”

    I KNEW IT!!!! They had forbidden girl fun!!!!

  221. Is there something about KKA that I need to know? Whats going on?

  222. How long before Jake Tapper is persona non grata?

    Soon I expect.

  223. That is too hot Sohita!

  224. “Whats going on?”

    practicing for the 1st Annual HICCEC

  225. *la la la la, lu lu lu lu, lick, lick ….this is hard*

    MOM!!!!! KKA IS A CUNNING LINGUIST!!!!

  226. So, why is TAT popping in and out and not hanging around?

    Sorry, watching Big Bang Theory.

  227. Sorry, watching Big Gang Bang Theory.

    TATOO!!!

  228. I have to go wash my hands so I don’t get manbirdpig flu.

    brb

  229. Is puddle mover still here?

  230. Hey Rosie what is the difference between a circus and a beauty pageant?

  231. “”practicing for the 1st Annual HICCEC””

    haaahahaaahaaha

  232. the clowns wear less makeup!

  233. puddle mover?

  234. “KKA IS A CUNNING LINGUIST!!!!”

    Yes, yes I am…

    no, wait, WHU??

  235. Sorry, watching Big Gang Bang Theory.

    TATOO!!!

    I was only watching it b/c you starred in it. And you missed a ‘t’ goober.

  236. Ever find a picture of yourself and you look at your outfit and think, “WHAT the hell was I thinking???”

  237. One has a cunning array of stunts

  238. post it, KAK!

  239. Xbrad, BiW said that aside from being hungry he is good. He thanks you and says his mom is now out of surgery.

  240. “1st Annual HICCEC”

    Can you imagine us all with our tongues half frozen. And we think we sound funny now!

  241. haha, sohito, I think I know the rest

  242. One has a cunning array of stunts

    The beauty pageant has stunts? I thought it was called the talent competition?

  243. “KAK!”

    Kak??? wt?? That’s what it’s come to between us BaDart? A hairball name?

    well, I’m offended.

  244. I see no problem, AKK

  245. Rosetta, BiW says you’re confused. Your wife keeps calling him for sex and it’s starting to piss him off.

  246. Kak???

    ha! Up here in Boston that’s pronounced…

  247. No, I can’t post it. It was taken a few days after my mom’s funeral. My eyes are all puffy, and my hands look like ten cucumbers.

  248. Annie?

  249. I thought my punchline was worthy of a rimshot

  250. Ever find a picture of yourself and you look at your outfit and think, “WHAT the hell was I thinking???”

    Yes.

  251. “Up here in Boston that’s pronounced…”

    like what’s in your shots?

  252. Is PJM here?

  253. heh, Sohitomarialopez, that’s cute!! I’m keep him. I’ll wuv him and hug him and sweep wif him and feed him potato eyes.

  254. yes, like that

    but I’m not wearing shorts

    /makes creepy growling noise

  255. Here is what I want to tell PJM about her HHD Post:

    I love you and want to have your baby.

  256. MARE!!!!!!!!!!

  257. “/makes creepy growling noise”

    hawt!

  258. Hi, KKA!

  259. Hi Burl. BiW wants me to…uh….*looks at text message*…”stick my finger in your eye.” Whatever that means. I guess I’m supposed to be mean to you or something.

  260. Hey Mare…weren’t those pretty nice marines?

  261. tell you what, give me your hand and…

  262. omg omg…is Darbert going to propose??? omg!! like, oh my gawd

  263. I’m not giving you my hand. I don’t know where your hand has been.

  264. dling I had to say it out loud and then laughed. good one silly boy

  265. Darling,
    Stop being nice, it’s creeping me out.

  266. let’s make a deal…

    if neither of us is married in 10 years, I’ll marry you

  267. Who are you talking to Burl?

  268. What about OUR deal for 5 years? huh?

    *sobs in uncontrollable heartbreak rage*

  269. Sorry darling, I’ll never marry again.

  270. Rosetta, BiW says you’re confused. Your wife keeps calling him for sex and it’s starting to piss him off.

    It only pisses him off because he’s gay and likes turkey neck in the buttock?

  271. Ok, people…have at it. I’ve got two lugs of strawberries to put up tonight. I may be back, may not.

  272. I’m talking to Pupkat Follie

    obviously

  273. Annie,
    I have a 24 month plan, If you are still around in 24 months I will marry you.

  274. what is two lugs of strawberries?

  275. KKA, I have said many times our guys in the military are studs.

    I went through the old thread and saw a very good picture of xbrad.

  276. Grab it KKA Vmax would be an EXCELLENT husband!

  277. so would darling too….some girls have all the luck

  278. “I have a 24 month plan, If you are still around in 24 months I will marry you.”

    Why wait? You would both be a great catch.

  279. Rosetta, have you done anything naughty today?

  280. xbrad is a good looking, sweet, funny, christian man…some woman outta grab him up. We really have the best men in the world here. (Even Mesa) 😉

  281. Sohita, I agree. How are these guys single?

  282. Has to be by choice.

  283. We need a Hostage wedding. Wouldn’t that be fun????

  284. Sohita, I’m trying to snag Xbrad but he keeps resisting. Vmax is probably too nice for me although he and Annie would do well together.

  285. I would be a terrible husband.

    I have developed a skill.

  286. No, my past 20 relationships have crapped out between 12 and 18 months. If I can find someone that can put up with me for longer than 18 months I will keep them around.

  287. No, my past 20 relationships have crapped out between 12 and 18 months. If I can find someone that can put up with me for longer than 18 months I will keep them around.

    Maybe you keep picking the wrong woman.

  288. Whatever Dave!!!!!!!!!!! Our married men are so wonderful!

  289. Vmax is probably too nice for me

    Yup they all say that.

    Or I call what are you doing Friday night? “Washing my hair” How about Saturday night? “Drying my hair”

    Oh I get it! Sunday you are rearranging your sock drawer? or cleaning the lint out of your pockets?

  290. Yup they all say that.

    Or I call what are you doing Friday night? “Washing my hair” How about Saturday night? “Drying my hair”

    Oh I get it! Sunday you are rearranging your sock drawer? or cleaning the lint out of your pockets?

    Uh, I’m not that lame.

  291. What happens at around 18 months Vmax?

  292. Rosetta, have you done anything naughty today?

    Please define “naughty”.

  293. GO ROCKETS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  294. Of course you are not lame Folly you are great. And smart, you would come up with something totally plausible.

    Nothing Mare,
    around a year things go to shit.
    I guess I bore them to tears.

  295. Rosetta, BiW says that you’re just mad because he won’t join you at your personal lemon parties. Your crush on him is embarrassing because the exit door leads out. IYKWIMAITTYD.

  296. AHHA…good news. Grandkids are going to eat the strawberries!! woohoo.

    Sohos, a lug is like a case = 8#’s to be exact. I bought 16 pounds for 10 bucks. They are wonderful , big , and really juicy. Better than sex. (shut your whore minds)

  297. “”Uh, I’m not that lame.””

    Folly and the other wimmens, what do you recall is your best getoutofadate excuse you’ve used?

  298. Of course you are not lame Folly you are great. And smart, you would come up with something totally plausible.

    Ouch. That stung. I would not lie to you, Vmax.

  299. “Annie,
    I have a 24 month plan, If you are still around in 24 months I will marry you.”

    AWWWWWWWWW…what a sweetie. Be careful what you wish for!!!

  300. “what do you recall is your best getoutofadate excuse you’ve used?”

    My husband is home on leave…..

  301. no no,,,I’ve never used that.

    I usually just say , No Thanks, you suck!!

  302. Thank you Annie I didn’t know. Now I am craving strawberry shortcake.

  303. Actually the you are too nice precludes dating, that is the blow off to pre-empt the what are you doing Friday night question.

  304. I made strawberry muffins….. nummy nummy…

  305. I cant think back to that long ago.

  306. uhhh, go BLAZERS…. pffffffttttttt

  307. While I appreciate all the wimmens that said I’m cute, I have to be honest, it ain’t always the case.

    I’m on the right in blue shorts…

  308. Define Naughty.

    Anything funny, silly or that would make me shoot water out of my nose.

  309. lemme guess, KAK, you gonna make some strawbeery jell-o next?

    THERE’S ALWAYS ROOM IN YOUR WHORE MOUTH FOR JELL-O!!!

  310. Annie,
    My mom slices them up into 1/8″ slices and sugars them. Then lets them sit in the sugar for a day or so. The sugar draws the juice out of the strawberry’s. It is nice.

  311. So, Vmax…you think you’re boring — I would call that leaving me alone and not hanging around too much? Not talking about yourself all the time? Not “whatcha doing??” “why don’t you come watch me do manly things”….kinda boring?

  312. Looking good! Does the guy in the yellow shorts have a broken leg?

  313. Folly and the other wimmens, what do you recall is your best getoutofadate excuse you’ve used?

    I’m usually brutally honest. Probably, “I don’t think we should date anymore.”

  314. There was lots of beer involved in that pic Xbrad

  315. “onest, it ain’t always the case.

    I’m on the right in blue shorts…”

    OH MY holy gawd, why, oh why would you post that picture???

    Yer still cute , but omg,,,that pose,,those guys,,too much touching with too much skin

    *looks for anti-skin crawling medicine*

  316. Actually the you are too nice precludes dating, that is the blow off to pre-empt the what are you doing Friday night question.,/i>

    Um, ok.

  317. I’m on the right in blue shorts…

    And drunk off your ass, hahahahaha. Still cute though.

  318. No Annie,
    I like to spend time with my GF

    But I have been to engineering school, the math warps your mind and makes you boring. Engineers are strange.

  319. Vmax we spend a lot of time with you. You are in NO way boring. You are handsome, considerate, loving and funny. Any woman would be lucky to be with you.

  320. Rosetta, BiW says that you’re just mad because he won’t join you at your personal lemon parties. Your crush on him is embarrassing because the exit door leads out. IYKWIMAITTYD.

    Folly, take a letter:

    BiW,

    Your attempts at involving me in your demented sexual affairs crossed a line when you sent me a picture of you sticking a framed picture of wiserbud up your ass.

    I will politely ask you to now cease and desist from all future attempts to get me to stop having the hots for chicks. The time has come for you to move on with your attempts to lick a bald man’s head.

    I will close this letter with a recommendation that you contact MCPO as he is bald and likes men.

    Any futher communication from you will result in a hit man visiting your ass and busting a cap in the aforementioned ass.

    Eat yourself out,

    Rosetta

  321. Xbrad, anyone who would post that has a great sense of humor!

    hahahahahaha Well done!

  322. Looking good! Does the guy in the yellow shorts have a broken leg?

    Torn ACL.

  323. Husband screen capped a funny on CNNs main page this afternoon—third item in Latest News. Quite a typo.

    Blue Cheese. Mesa, Anchor bar was on Throwdown with Bobby Flay last night.

    Folly, please tell BiW I’ll be praying for his Mom.

  324. Sohita,
    You are too nice, thank you.
    But you are engaged. That lowers your standards by 3-4 points.

  325. Rosie, I’ll let him read that when he gets back as I do not have enough text memory for it all.

    I’m now off to take my bath before I inadvertently insult anyone or get insulted over date choices. bbl

  326. not that you know it, you are secure in your relationship. It just lowers your expectations for others.

  327. Heck , I may as well post the picture of the forced smile, the puffy eyes, the swollen fingers (not sure WHAT that’s all about) the crazy 3 sizes too big blazer,,,,,,,

  328. Go for it, KornKat.

  329. you should take the ‘puter in the bath with you, Folly

    liveblog your bath!!!

  330. Darling is obviously an “ideas” man. Do you work in corporate?

  331. Vmax I have GREAT taste in men no matter what 🙂

  332. “Go for it, KornKat.”

    oh no,,,,

  333. But I have been to engineering school, the math warps your mind and makes you boring. Engineers are strange.

    I resemble that remark.

  334. speaking of pictures. Does Rosetta still want new POL pics?

  335. Vmax..I don’t mind spending time with guys I’m dating, of course. I just can’t stand the ones that follow me around all over like puppies. I like time to myself, that’s why I don’t complain if they watch a game, or go out *with conditions, of course*, etc. I like a man that can find a hobby besides picking at me all day.

  336. Mare, it’s only a matter of time before we’re all streaming vid while we chat.

  337. “Engineers are strange.”

    hah…I know one of those … always a better mousetrap one the horizon.

    “I can find a better way of doing that,…..”

  338. “matter of time before we’re all streaming vid while we chat.”

    NO. WAY.

  339. it’s only a matter of time before we’re all streaming vid while we chat.

    Even sooper secret agents of U.N.C.L.E.???!!?

  340. MCPO, thanks for the Dixie Chicken earlier.

  341. “Mare, it’s only a matter of time before we’re all streaming vid while we chat.”

    Wouldn’t that be interesting. Multi screen of the Hostages currently commenting. Would it ruin the funny?

  342. I would wear a disguise.

    http://tinyurl.com/8zvrz

  343. >> Whatever Dave!!!!

    Sorry, I was watching the Souter news. Hmph! You haven’t seen me work my craft. The most refined skill I have, I can do that man thing, totally forgetting the offense I committed a year ago that you have seared, seared into your memory to use against me at a later date. I can look so confused, so completely not remembering it will make you wonder IF IN FACT I EVER REALLY DID IT. Hah.

    Also, post for xbrad about a superb artillery fight over at IB.

  344. Lingbart, obviously, you have NO idea of all the things I do while I’m reading the Hostages…….

    *minds outta that gutter!*

  345. the only drawback is that we’d have to dress

  346. Heheh
    Hi Romy!

    It really is the math isn’t it?

    I made Calc 3, thermo, and hydraulics.

    I suck at math.

  347. Romy – You are welcome!

  348. “the only drawback is that we’d have to dress”

    Good point. I’d have to put on make-up.

  349. Ok,,,nighty night. Grandma duties in the morning…..

  350. it would be funny, though

    we wouldn’t b able to see sohita because she’d be laying down all the time, so all we’d see is an empty chair

    and we’d see Bear

    and we’d see Rosetta shaving his head…

  351. Night, KKA!

    Darling is that a picture of you?

  352. G’nite, KornKob!

  353. Ha!
    Bart’s disguise wins!

  354. OH…and I got my grades… 3.871 grade average.

    Thanks to everybody for putting up with me. I have one more class next week, but it’s not graded. It’s been a long, long, long semester. Thanks for making it bearable.

    SMOOCH!!

  355. Bart, don’t post a picture of yourself, okay?

  356. Wunnerful! We’re going to have thunder storms and rain for the next 5 days!

  357. HA! PattyAnn, I was just going to tell Darling to post a picture.

    KKA, GREAT JOB!

  358. Anything funny, silly or that would make me shoot water out of my nose.

    Mare, today I went to the store to buy the following:

    14 bags of Hershey’s kisses, 9 fifths of vodka, a carton of Marlboro Lights, 3 shovels, a garden hoe, 5 ghetto hoes, another garden hoe, a pair of panty hoe, 100 cases of beer, a fireplace lighter, a copy of that Playboy with Farrah Fawcet, 2 pencil erasers, a surgical mask, 9 midgets named Bart, an 8-track player, a passport with my picture under the name “TittyFace Jenkins”, a private jet, an ambulance, some beef jerky, Kerry Marie, a box of depends, a kilo of pure Colombian blow, some hot peppers, a monkey, $250,000 in cash, a new iPod, a tattoo artist, an evening gown, 1,000 Roman candles, the Greatest Hits of Van Halen, a GPS satellite receiver, 3 trampolines, 3 tramps named Eileen, 5 lbs. of bacon, a lawnmower, scissors and cheese.

    The funny thing was I forgot the fucking cheese.

  359. that means I will have to put on pants

  360. I’m not putting on pants just for you losers.

  361. Vmax, I think I am just wired different. Example – the earlier thread where the other women were oohing and ahing over shoes. I’ve only been flipped over shoes one time, and that was when I found the perfect black high-heel “fuck me” shoes. The rest of the time, they are to keep my feet from getting splinters and somewhat go with an outfit.

    Math may be part of it. I had partial differential equations. I was damn good at math, but I think I have forgotten most of it. I rarely use anything more complicated than a square root where I’m at.

  362. nite KKA

  363. Anybody know the name of this tune on this video?

  364. good night KKA. Good job on your grades.

  365. heh. I worked in finance for almost a decade and never did anything more complex than multiplication.

  366. SOOPER SECRET AGENT BURL: http://tiny.pl/zpd2

  367. Rosetta,

    hahahahahahaa

    I have water shootage!

    14 bags of Hershey’s Kisses, of all you list that really makes me laugh.

  368. Hi Tbom!

  369. OH…and I got my grades… 3.871 grade average.

    MOM!!!!!!!! KKA CHEATED OFF THE ASIAN KID AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!

    Good job, KKA. Not only are you beautiful and fun, you are also smart and that’s why we all love you.

    YAY KKA!!!!!!

  370. TBOM – It’s called “The Tittyface Jenkins March”

  371. Hi Mare!!

  372. Your lists are on my “Favorite Rosetta Funnies” List.

  373. Yes, good job, KKA!

  374. I remember DE roamy!
    I think I did bad in it.

    My nightly Max pic
    max walking
    Max walking.

  375. TBOM – It’s called “The Tittyface Jenkins March”

    Thanks MCPOld…I’m putting together a Mother’s Day video of the kids pictures…and nothing says love like “The Tittyface Jenkins March”

    Anyone else got a clue?

  376. TBoM, you wanna fight?

  377. Your lists are on my “Favorite Rosetta Funnies” List.

    If you need me to pick anything up for you next time I’m out, just let me know.

  378. Hi Tbom,

    I am calling it a night.
    Good night all.

  379. Rosetta…I only got a minute

    Rosetta?

  380. ’m putting together a Mother’s Day video of the kids pictures…

    PUSSY!!! Take her to a strip club and buy her a lapdance like a real man!

  381. There will be no pic, PantryAmber.

  382. ‘Night, Vmax!

  383. Tbom, I used my iphone Shazam and it did not recognize that music. Maybe it’s an “in house” recording for Apple. I’m sorry I couldn’t find it.

  384. Double Dose

    Rosetta?

    and

    MCPO in the Navy

  385. No problem Mare…I’ll find a different tune. Thanks for checking

  386. TBoM, you may not be here long but you made me laugh.

  387. I’m putting together a Mother’s Day video of the kids pictures…

    See what I said. Best men ever!

  388. I’m back.

  389. Goodnight Vmax

  390. VMax, DE was my bitch. Nice pic of Max, as always.

  391. Hahahaha. TBoM is a funny jackass.

  392. Welcome back, Folly. Are your naughty bits nice and clean? Did you wash behind your ears?

  393. Ok, now what?

  394. Tbom, cheat and call it “Apple of My Eye”.

    And those were some disgusting photos. I can’t imagine what you discarded along the way to posting those.

    Gonna send one of them to my brother and ask, “You again?”

  395. Welcome back, Folly. Are your naughty bits nice and clean? Did you wash behind your ears?

    Thank you, Xbrad. Yes, every single inch of me is clean.

  396. Um…Davie Souter is retiring?

  397. I had lasagna and garlic bread. I want apple pie or peach cobbler w/ice cream. who has it?

  398. I’ve got some ice cream right here in my pocket. . .

  399. Rosie – Notice he waited until a Dem was President??

  400. Likely Supreme Court Nominees?

    Rosie O’Donnell?

    Tittyface Jenkins?

    Jose Padilla?

    Who?

  401. Hey…the next BBF is stretching…getting ready for tomorrow

  402. XBrad, we’ll get the Dems’ version of Harriet Miers.

  403. Great. He’ll pick the most leftist damn judge he can find. I never liked Souter.

  404. Some defense lawyer for a GITMO detainee, no doubt.

  405. It could be worse, Romy.

    He could pick Harriet Meiers.

  406. Maybe he’ll pick Bill Clinton. Assuming he has gotten his law license back.

  407. XBrad, good point. Anyone who wants to be a Supreme Court Justice ought to know the difference between Earl Warren and Warren Burger.

    From Ace, I’ve been following the Freeper thread on Photoshopping Air Force One in NYC.

    Nice job on this one:

  408. I dont think Obama and the Clinton’s like each other much.

  409. I left you all with a new post present…Good Night y’all

  410. I’m off to bed. Night all.

  411. Rosie – Notice he waited until a Dem was President??

    Yes. I do believe the Dems owe us one Supreme Court appointment.

    I don’t know what kind of porn Souter likes but I know it’s wrong.

  412. Did any of you see the clip of John Stewart last night say that Truman was a war criminal for dropping the bomb?

    Hahahahahahaaha.

    Keep talking idiot. Please. Continue to talk.

    Dumbfuck.

  413. Um…Rosetta…did we forget to tell you we went to a new post?
    Hahahahaha

  414. Um…Rosetta…did we forget to tell you we went to a new post?
    Hahahahaha

    WAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

    Thanks for giving me love, PattyAnn.

  415. WTF? I’m not sure I want to turn on anything that delivers news anymore.

    Obama overrides the DHS and FBI again and plans on releasing the Uighurs into the US with benefits.

    And ABC, who most likely lamented the non-covert Plame getting ‘outed’, OUTS the two guys associated with the CIA and the architects of waterboarding. Names and places of business. WTF?

    http://abcnews.go.com/Blotter/story?id=7471217&page=1

  416. And I wanted to go to bed early, now I’m worked up.

    Meh.


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