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This week’s model is a young beauty that originally hails from the Check (fuck you and your fancy spellin’) Republic. Now a Brit, she is in he twenties and can’t seem to keep from looking sick, confused, or high as flippin’ kite. Please welcome some deranged chick with big knockers.

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Test time! Please form an orderly line and pick up your No 2 pencil and a Scantron form. MCPO, please just pick up a hammer, chisel, and a black piece of granite.

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98 – Trajan becomes Roman Emperor after the death of Nerva.

661 – The Rashidun Caliphate ends with death of Ali.

1606 – Gunpowder Plot: The trial of Guy Fawkes and other conspirators begins, ending with their execution on January 31.

1776 – American Revolutionary War: Henry Knox’s “noble train of artillery” arrives in Cambridge, Massachusetts.

1785 – The University of Georgia is founded, the first public university in the United States.

1870 – The Kappa Alpha Theta fraternity is founded at DePauw University.

1939 – First flight of the Lockheed P-38 Lightning.

1951 – Nuclear testing at the Nevada Test Site begins with a one-kiloton bomb dropped on Frenchman Flat.
1961 – Soviet submarine S-80 sinks with all hands lost.

1967 – Astronauts Gus Grissom, Edward White and Roger Chaffee are killed in a fire during a test of their Apollo 1 spacecraft at the Kennedy Space Center, Florida.

1984 – Pop singer Michael Jackson suffers second degree burns to his scalp during the filming of a Pepsi commercial in the Shrine Auditorium.

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And there you have it. One fucked up, Check-Brit. I’ll be busy doing nothing this weekend. You should stop by. We’ll put a few steaks on the grill and talk smack about everyone. Bring beer. Bring good beer.

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Damn it Roamy!  What have you done?

Yes.  Thank you for elucidating, Mare.

The auto bailout cost about $23.6B, which means that the average, federal income tax paying citizen paid about $310 to help support the auto industry in 2011 (this would represent total cost).  Most people would look at this and think that it’s not that big of a deal–except that all of it was completely unnecessary.  The administration used TARP funds to bailout GM and Chrysler so that union pensions and wages would not be reduced as part of the normal bankruptcy process.  The investors took the cut rather than the entire organization, thus preserving a core voting bloc for Obama.  Your $310 was transferred directly to a UAW worker, that averaged $40.33 per hour in wages and benefits, or $83,886 per year.

As part of the reelection campaign, the Obama administration is going to constantly tout the ‘saving of the auto industry’ as a positive accomplishment.  The amount of money poured into the gaping maw of the auto industry is staggering–50 times that of Solyndra–and should be called out for what it is: corruption, straight up.

TURDSDAY MORNING POAT UPDATE by Hotspur

I will not get into the people who have withdrawn. Well except for Rick Perry, he was almost ready for prime time and the best of the field, until he dropped out. I am done with that so lets talk about the rest.

Let me start with Ron Paul. Really? Is he even a republican? He is conspiracy 101. His base is tinfoil hats. Oklahoma City was a inside job? Contrails? 911 truthers? Why do you even let him on the stage? Giggles? To make the rest of them look sane?

Rick Santorum.

As a social conservative I have some respect for where he is coming from. He is a me too conservative that was a squish senator. He will tell you anything to get elected. He believes that government is the answer. Do you have a problem? Government will fix the booboo for you. Big Government is the answer to all that ails you. He is a big government technocrat that is mouthing conservative talking points just so he can be elected.

Newt

I love Newt but he can NEVER be president. Never. Ever.

Newt has fantastic ideas. Really dumb ideas, fantastically stupid ideas. He needs a filter. I love 10% of his ideas. I am Meh on 80% of his ideas. I truly despise 10% of his ideas. He is all over the chart. He is a scrapper. I admire that. I want someone with fire in their belly! Take the fight to Obama! Newt has that. Sadly he has tons of baggage. He is Cabinet level tops.

Mitt

I voted for Mitt in the 2008 primary. He has the business chops to fix the economy.

He is a squish that will say anything to get elected. I took a few hours to read everything on his web site. EVERYTHING!

I agreed with 98%. He was a little vague on much. However I read everything he said. I disagreed with him on using Bowles Simpson as a starting point for the tax code. Really? Lets use Obama’s the most socialist president in the US history as a starting point? His overall sentiments were  positive. Unfortunately he is a wooden animatronic caricature of somebody with a ego that will say anything to be elected.

That covers the current republican field. Egoist failures that cannot beat Obama. WTF are you thinking? Bob Dole? Yes Bob was a fantastic war hero. I honor and respect his service and courage. President? Not so much. I think Mitt is the establishment Bob Dole. Only with less courage and respect.

I look at the people who did not run. Sarah Palin, she is the most controversial but I want to vote for her to make Democrats heads explode! Not to mention I agree with her 98% of the time.

Jeb Bush My 1st pick

As a Floridian I approve. He took the whole state including corrupt Miami/Ft Lauderdale and made it turn right. He was a hell of a great governor. He is wrong on Immigration but I will give him a pass on 1 thing.

Rubio!

What can I say. A little seasoning and he is the man. I have not found a thing I can fault him on.

Jindal

Anybody? Anybody? What a great person.

Nikki Hailey? I like but give her a few years. However she is better right now than Barack.

Scott Walker has proved he can make a difference. Where is he?

Paul Ryan

Has his hand on the economy. He is a dud to the electorate. No Fire no fight. just good economics.

Did I mention Scott Walker? He has PROVED he can govern a state and balance the budget. Anybody? Anybody?

I have more that I would consider as a good nominee however I am running out of steam. Last but well maybe least Chris Christie. He had the fire in his belly. He will not put up with the BS from the MFM. While not my favorite he has none of Newts baggage and…well he kicks ass and takes names. He is not a namby pamby Mitt.

My first and best hope for president is Bill Bennett.

What a awesome man! Candor, Intelligence, and good will in spades! If someone made me dictator for life I would abdicate to him.

What we need is someone who does not want to run for president. I do not wish any of these egomaniacs on our country. After all we have ego in chief Barack now what could go wrong?

Oops 5 trillion in dept given out to democrat supporters.

Wait another pipeline pic

One last thing Oil Gas and Natural gas pipelines. Buffet is being rewarded by Obama for shutting down the XL pipeline. See Aggies post here
and the pipeline graphics  oopsie that is only Natural gas pipelines. Nebraska has how many?

Here is the major trunk lines of oil and gas over 20″ pipelines

Yup right through that protected  aquifer how many times?

It’s the H2.  What were you expecting?

I propose we all have a brandy Alexander and tune out the endless droning of a certain miserable fucking douchebag who never shuts the fuck up.

Cold refreshing sodas are also available for two bits.

You are now free to move about the cabin.

[UPDATE:  wiserbud]

Considering this is probably the weakest effort anyone has ever put forward in creating a new poat here at the Hostages (nicely done, Gland), I feel it is perfectly fine to add this critical update.

We recently had a joke thread where we came up with the worst names for charities.  Leon won that thread, hands down, with his brilliant submission, Animosity International.  Seriously, that had me laughing for days afterwords.

At the time, I promised leon that I wold create a logo for that.  And as I am always one to keep my word, here it is:

In my mind, this is now the official Hostage logo.  In fact, if you are so inclined,  you can purchase shirts and other stuff with the logo on it here.

All profits to be used at the next meat-up towards the bar tab.

Now please, go forward and enjoy the rest of your day… you freaks

So, you might be asking yourself, do I look fat?

Yep, you look fat. Can you fix that with some hard work?

Maybe. Look, for the sake of argument, let’s say yes. Let’s say you actually pull out that old racket and play some tennis.

Maybe do a little basic yoga or something.

The important thing is to break a sweat now and then, like this gal.

Hideous, I know, all sweaty like that, but you gotta put in the work, and pull yourself up and forward.

Now go slap Monday across the face with your pimp hand, and say “Bitch where’s my money!?”

This is me, at work.

CaRin at work.

Dave in Office.

Leon works with numbers.

Roamie roams the the halls, looking for inefficiency.

Wiserbud closes the deal.

MJ wavers on his staff meeting strategy.

Sohos offers advice on your interviewing skills.

Xbrad lives with his mom. There is a reason.

Rosetta entertains some potential clients.

And PJ finally lands her dream support center job. (She is the cute one.)