Big Boob Friday–Moar Star Wars

Hi. This week will feature a small budget, independent film that almost no one has seen. It is a wonderful representation of the struggle of good and evil in the universe and ultimately in one’s self. I speak of a movie called Star Wars. I’ll pause here while you search the intertits for a page, paragraph, or image related to this little known gem of cinematic art.

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I have no idea who this model is, and she doesn’t exactly represent the normal theme of the Friday Fap Fest™ but, damn, this is hotter than a 1000 suns, in a 1000 microwaves, in Mila Kunis’ kitchen. Please allow me to Force myself on you….Imperial Guardette.

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Flukemania!

I think it was Bugs Bunny who said, “It is to laugh.”

Sandra Fluke, the woman at the center of a media firestorm earlier this year after Rush Limbaugh called her a “slut,” spoke Saturday in front of about 10 people at the Sak ‘N Save in north Reno.

BREAKING: Draft of Obama’s 2013 Inauguration speech discovered

Must credit Wiserbud!

DRAFT

President Barack Obama’s 2013 Inauguration Speech

Are you fucking kidding me??  Seriously, are you people out of your fucking minds?  You re-elected me?  ME??   I’m the worst fucking President this country has ever seen and you stupid fucking idiots actually voted me to a second term??  Jesus Christ, people, what the hell do I have to do here?

Did you honestly think I really wanted a second term?  Fuck no, I didn’t even want a FIRST term, you fucking fools!  Didn’t I make that painfully obvious with all the dumbass  shit  I pulled during this campaign?  But noooooo, you goddamn assholes had to re-elect me anyway.

Big Boob Friday™

Good afternoon, ladies. Glad to see you all made it through hell week, albeit with a slightly compromised liver. Welcome to your weekly tit fix, even if the head ewok is sort of down on the Five Knuckle Olympics, featuring the One Man Tug-o-War. I added the commentary to this song while watching the teevee on Tuesday-Thursday this week…”SOS…Kill me…”

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This week’s fap fantasy cums from the great state of Arizona, and was born in 1990 (that makes her 21, but I still feel like a total perv). Her lab results came back positive for sexiness with an overall score of 34D-26-37. Please give a grool slick ovation to the girl with two first names…Christine Veronica !!!!!!!!!!11!

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Let’s turn Friday the 13th into BBF the 13th!

Superstition? Pshaw! Let’s check in with the luckiest man ever!

Ok, maybe lucky is a strong word. But it’s just a day. Let’s get on with the business of Friday, which we all know is BBF.

Today’s guest is from Szigetvar, Hungary. Born on Friday (she was destined to be featured here) April 17, 1981, today’s model is no spring chicken. But, we all know things get better with age. Hugh Hefner thought so, he made her Playmate of the Year (in 2004, work with me here). Standing 5′ 9″ tall, our model needs every inch to stand up to her name. 1st Hostage to pronounce her name correctly wins one of Car in’s chickens (not Little Jerry, though). Let’s welcome Zsuzsanna Ripli!

Big Boob Friday™

Afternoon, fuckers of oldness.  I wrote this song for Eric Clapton, Jack Bruce, and Ginger Baker while in a white room, with black curtains, by the station.

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Today’s model is from the Czech Rzpzblzc, and is listed as 25 years old. I’m calling bullshit on that, although maybe it’s the miles, not the years. Who knows how old anyone is in the former USSR satellites? This super hot chick lists herself as 29, although I’m guessing she’s not a day under 30. Please welcome this week’s model, that once again proves it’s pretty hard to airbrush a butterface, Gabrielle Passtel!!!!

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Big Boob Friday™ -Hot Chick Boxing Edition

The picture of the loverly Alice Goodwin in the boxing get up last week really made in an impression on me. And by impression I mean I enjoyed the composition of the photography, the styling of the make-up artist, and I felt a deep appreciation for the work that goes into making a woman look beautiful. Then I taped it to the back of Mrs MJs head and went 10 rounds.

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Mrs MJ wrote the song linked above after reading my post (and left me this original recording). Today’s girls are an assortment of chicks in boxing gear. Lest you think this was put together by Leon, non of these beauties are related to Dick Tuck.

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Muscular Monday Motivational

Greetings and welcome to another Monday in Reverend Wright’s America. Despite the bad reverend and his worthless, SCOAMF White House #occupy-ing disciple, we must carry on. There’s work to do, and it’s not like those other butt nuggets are gonna do it. This is merely another storm to be weathered, and it ill-behooves us to do nothing whilst the hatched are battened but shelter in place.

When the storm finally passes and the fog lifts, and the fresh soil is ripe for plowing, we who have persevered through far more Mondays’ worth of pay cuts and layoffs than we deserved will be among the first to plant fresh seeds, and the first to enjoy the ripe fruit that can only grow in an America set free to prosper again.

Now, some ripe fruit. No plowing required.

Tales from the Dumb Side

Our story today comes, yet again, from my favorite pet leftist, the music store guitar teacher.

Not actually him, but pretty damn close.

I mentioned semi-humorously that I would be incredibly surprised if any Progressives actually bought a MegaMillions lottery ticket this week, when you consider that winning would immediately catapult that person directly into the top 1%. And, as we have all learned over the past few months, being in the top 1% is evil, unfair, borderline criminal and downright anti-American.

Muscular Monday Motivational

Greetings, excellent people. We’ve had a rough couple of weeks and some big losses, I know, but it’s Monday now. The good lord has seen fit to bless us with another week, another fresh chance to start anew and maybe push back the forces of totalitarianism that threaten to engulf our once-great-and-will-be-great-again nation. So strap on your rollerblades and go taunt some Occutards.

And now, hot chicks that can squat more than you weigh.

You want more, right? We got more.