[Rosetta left an unused post in draft. In case you didn't realize it, no matter who completes the post, the person who originally created it is tagged as the author of that post. So I, wiserbud, took Rosetta's unused draft post and wrote the following.]
You may have noticed my absence in the past few months. [JOKE ALERT: NO ONE NOTICED OR CARED!!]
You may have assumed it is because of the changes I have experienced over the last 12 to 18 months, such as having a son and moving to a new home. [USE OF COMMONLY KNOWN FACTS ABOUT TARGET OF JOKE TO ESTABLISH "BONA FIDES" OF "AUTHOR" IN ORDER TO SET UP JOKE!!]
Well, that is not the only change that I have experienced recently. [SETUP!! GET READY... HERE COMES THE JOKE!!!]
Not to say he was all that amazingly popular to start with, but damn, dude… barely semi-popular and you still decide to off your career?
Muslim suicide bombers in Britain are set to begin a three-day strike on Monday in a dispute over the number of virgins they are entitled to in the afterlife. Emergency talks with Al Qaeda have so far failed to produce an agreement.
No, not you embarrassing “journalists” who serve as nothing other than flaccid propaganda organs for this administration. You go fuck yourselves. I mean really? You don’t know how to spin horrific events in Libya until Jay Carney sends you a sext?
Think about that you MSNBC hacks. You get your talking points from Jay fucking Carney. No one expects more from MSNBC but the rest of you MSM bluenecks are all blatant shills, idiots and losers and you are pathetic at the trade you sorrily pretend to practice. You please go ahead and vote for Obama because he makes you feel, unsuccessfully I’m guessing, like less of a old guilt-ridden condescending privileged racist.
This letter is also not intended for the other out-of-touch sneering warm-mongering Democrat-members of the 1% who pretend to care about the “little people”.
Greetings, comrades, and welcome to the Labor Day edition of MMM. As you go about your affairs on this Communist holiday, remember that that’s what it is. If you’re a good little capitalist like me, you’re gonna use the day off to accomplish some work-like aims, probably in the yard. And if you don’t have the day off because you’re self-employed and know that such things are a Marxist fantasy, we here at MMM respect your wherewithal and sacrifice, and hope that it yields many happy returns.
Also, I hope lots of PEU guys have grilling accidents today, but that’s just a result of my twisted, black little heart.
If you have a lot of hard work to do today, I hope it flows well enough to feel like a montage. This is a montage sorta, so the comment fits.