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“Alright, smartass. You can bring my skeleton back any time now.”
“Donga need food!”
I’m pretty sure I’ve seen this commercial. It features a Wendy Malick voiceover and a plea for donations to stop this from happening to another defenseless animal.
“Sherlock! You’ve killed the dog. . . again!”
they’re good fried; or so i hear
“I know as long as my eyes are closed, Obama isn’t really real.”
Comment by Sean M. on January 16, 2013 8:32 pm
Did anybody rip the felt on anybody else’s pool table today?
MOM!!!! SEANM’s GETTING A BRAZILIAN WAX JOB AGAIN!!!!
I haven’t followed all this notre dame shit today. What’s up. Was xbrad up for the Heisman Trophy or am I missing something?
Its not the fall that kills you, its the sudden stop at the end.
I demand to know who the asshole was who gave this a thumbs down?
That picture alone deserves a Pultxer or Novel prize!
“1st successful gastric bypass surgery on English Bulldog leaves pup listless and in need of a plastic surgeon”
“Floyd tries out for the Boneless Chicken Farm”
Mare’s my imaginary girlfriend. We just haven’t made the big time. Yet.
Mare- It was me. Why? Wanna start something?
Did anybody rip the felt on anybody else’s pool table today?
MOM!!!! SEANM’s GETTING A BRAZILIAN WAX JOB AGAIN!!!!
Heh heh heh – http://i.imgur.com/j4Ak3.gif
We just haven’t made the big time.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PBAl9cchQac
Nurse!
He’s deflating rapidly!
Bicycle pump! Stat!
MCPO, I will so kick your ass….especially now that you can’t focus.
PD, please meet me behind the dumpster…
“This is what happens when you crush and snort too many frozen Thin Mints. Don’t be a Thin Mint Sniffer.”
Okay, here goes:
Sweet little puppy, I’m going to give you razzies on your tummy and kiss your face and lift and drop your arms and legs and laugh, and then kiss your wrinkles and then name you after a 2nd tier athlete then, cuddle and then, wait…what were we talking about?
**counts dumpsters in greater DFW area**
This chick better be fucking nuclear!!!
Wretchards post at PJ media entitled “President Creosote” is worthy of your attention(IMHO) and contains, among many other tasty bits involving the “Suez Crisis” this comment, though rather “off Topic”:
27. Subotai Bahadur
#21 SF
There are some really jarring problems with what is claimed and facts.
1.) I have seen and possess the press interview with the County Medical Examiner within 24 hours of the shootings who stated repeatedly and categorically that the primary weapon used to kill the children was the .223 cal. Bushmaster rifle. He also claimed on the air to be more familiar with firearms than most medical examiners [an interesting assertion for a small town ME, given the number of firearms victims in Blue cities].
2.) I have seen and possess a news tape of the police retrieving and clearing the .223 caliber Bushmaster from the locked trunk of Lanza’s car. The weapon was not brought into the school, while the SIG and Glock pistols [and possibly 2 more pistols] were. The pistols are 9mm.
3.) Being semi-automatic, all the weapons involved eject spent cartridge cases when fired. Everywhere he shot should be littered with them. Anyone can tell the difference between .223 cases and 9mm cases at a glance.
4.) Wounds from the calibers differ.
5.) Just in physical evidence, someone is not telling the truth, and has not from the get-go.
There is much more.
Subotai Bahadur
I had also seen, but not bookmarked same.
We’ll NEVER know what really happened, only what THEY (Obama and MSM want us to think happened.
/conspiracy theorist, ChrisP
Alternate caption:
Dead puppies are still cute.
Oh! You need to crush the thin mints first! That explains a lot!
name you after a 2nd tier athlete
Tony Romo is NOT a good name for an English Bulldog pup. Metta World Peace would be a better choice.
“I can’t believe I ate the whooooole thing.”
“SIG and Glock pistols [and possibly 2 more pistols] were. The pistols are 9mm.”
Uhfff, I have both of those.
Chrispy, you are not the only one who thinks this is a CF or epic proportions, meaning, legislators are getting it all wrong.
Tony Romo…hahahahahah
Jagermeister for breakfast….not the best idea>
“I am never again playing the trust game.”
Soooo glad they legalized pot in Colorado.
Mare,
“Never let a crisis go to waste.”
It is their opp to disarm the public, as did Pol Pot, Lenin, Stalin, Mao, Hitler, and countless other tyrants.
As one comment I saw at Aces said; “I saw a movie about a country where only the Army and the police had guns. It was called “Schindlers List”.
“Floyd tries out for the Boneless Chicken Farm”
**golf clap**
“This is what happens when you crush and snort too many frozen Thin Mints. Don’t be a Thin Mint Sniffer.”
—————-
Haha.
Herself is reading magazines whilst I watch “Life On Fire” on PBS.
By the way, both the Glock and Sig have more than 8 round magazines as standards.
Chief,
Needle Biopsy, he asks, hope fully?
Wishing the Mrs the best. Give her a hug for me and tell her that she is a real “Trooper”, for being able to put-up with your shit for so long.
That ain’t no pillow that’s his asshole, he ain’t never stopped that fast before.
Try washing Floyd in hot water. Maybe that will shrink it to fit.
I shit you not. This is worth it.
http://pjmedia.com/richardfernandez/2013/01/16/president-creosote/
I have to go cool salmon now. I wish you all a good evening.
Hugs and kisses, snausages, and Wiser…
cool=cook.
So it goes…
cooling salmon.
So that’s what they call it now.
DiT,
The Kids these days…
I smoked some Salmon once.
Another “interesting post from Richard Fernandez is to be found here:
http://pjmedia.com/richardfernandez/2013/01/16/sahara/#more-26892
Sorry, I’m a fan of Wretchard.
And that’s the way it is;
January 16, 2013.
NYTOL,
ChrisP
I know! Also howdy dorinda.
(xbrad, I wouldn’ta told that)
#87,154 Paid in Kindle Store
I’m moving up in the rankings!
DiT,
Dorinda was a kitten that disappeared for six months, then found her way back.
She was a Calico sweetie. We never saw her again…
dang, I thought I found her for you.
Prayers up for Herself.
*wraps sleeping puppeh in baby blanket*
It’s all rank stupiditity and will not prevent a single murder in this country. But, Barack had his “I’m a man of action and a leader” moment on everyfuckingchannel, so it’s all good.
That’s basically what the St. Louis county police chief said. He wants more done on the mental health issue, but nada on bans.
So messed up I want you here
In my room I want you here
Now we’re gonna be face-to-face
And I’ll lay right down in my favorite place
And now I wanna be your derp
Now I wanna be your derp
Now I wanna be your derp
Morning.
This is easily the best thing you will read today. Check out the article, then the first comment.
http://is.gd/25Qayw
Nice find, MJ.
I, on the other hand, may have found a softcopy of the soundtrack to Quicksilver, which I was going to buy on CD, but it’s out of print and Amazon wants like $70 for it.
Fuck that, I used to own the cassette. This isn’t piracy, it’s digital restoration.
Good morning children.
Anybody lose an imaginary girlfriend today? Maybe you can get a day or two off work for mourning.
Good morning. Important nutrition info about GS cookies:
http://tinyurl.com/avumlan
Nutrifusion forgives all
Good morning, cool kids.
wakey wakey
Neighbor girl took our money for GS cookies last year and never delivered. We will see if she has the Lance Armstrongs to knock on our door again this year.
Thankfully our nearest Girl Scout is all growed up and off to college. She peddled those tiny morsels of destruction to a captive audience in the ‘hood for years
Pupster, you should have withheld payment until delivery. That’s the normal way to do it.
Order –> Delivery –> Payment.
Don’t trust anyone that promises product or service after payment is rendered, especially cute girls.
#thingsIdLikeToTell18yoMe
Good news! I just received notification that Pepe will be receiving his SS shipment soon.
Mare-J. ^^
You don’t pay upfront for GS Cookies?
Huh.
I never have, always ordered then paid when they arrived, or bought them directly from a table outside of a video rental or grocery store.
I’m going to go ahead and blame the untrustworthiness and general criminal nature of Buckeyes.
If you want to puke, read this
He’s not fit to walk in the same rain puddle as MLK Jr.
Hrm, I’ve paid quite a lot into Social Security. I’m sure the gummint wouldn’t welsh on that.
(apologies for comparing the gummint to Welshmen)
Wow. 2nd paragraph:
Future generations may mull the divine meaning of Barack Obama’s celebration and pageantry taking place on the very day set aside to honor Martin Luther King Jr., the civil rights leader gunned down on a Memphis hotel balcony in 1968.
Emphasis *barf*.
Mornin’, all!
Leftover pumpkin cheesecake for breakfast.
Did I mention I’m happy that DD#3 is back home? This being a culinary guinea pig is hard work but somebody’s got to do it…..
TFG is the antithesis of what Dr. King was fighting for.
The left is pretty good at rewriting history. I’m pretty sure that MLK would tell Obama to grow up if he was around, and would be appalled at the bastardization of his concept of equality.
2 up is shorter MJ.
MJ – I’m usually terse when I haven’t had my 3rd cup of coffee.
I know it’s fashionable to practically worship Martin Luther King Junior, but let’s be serious: a man who cheats on his wife is going to eventually come around to Obama’s point of view when presented with sufficient motivation.
My friend tipped me off that Walmart got a shipment of ammo and restocked overnight. I swung by before work and got four boxes of target ammo.
#itscomedowntothis
Interesting how the black culture has allowed TFG to “speak” for them when it comes to civil rights, given that the man who contributed the melanin was never an oppressed American descended from slaves.
There’s some interesting information about Dr. King in O’Reilly’s book Killing Kennedy. Casts him in a different light than what you are used to.
So Mr. TiFW’s company does something called “Health Miles”, where you basically agree to become a test monkey to “earn” $100 towards your health care costs. Wear a pedometer and/or enter your activity every day to earn “points”; get enough points, you “win” some money.
My MG diagnosis allows me to get a pass from doing the walking, but I still am expected to enter something each day to indicate…..I’m not sure what, but I have to jump through that hoop to get the credit.
So I go online today to enter my “activity”, and I am allowed to add my own category. Being a smartass, I enter “Work Out On Computer” under “Cardiovascular”, and log in 10 hours.
BOOM! My HealthMiles officially records that I burned almost 6000 calories.
Being somewhat confused, I enter the same thing under the “Activity” heading and the “Miles” heading (because the program doesn’t cross-reference these things automatically), and all of a sudden I’ve burned 18,000 calories.
In one day.
Sitting at my computer.
These people are morons…..
There’s some interesting information about Dr. King in O’Reilly’s book Killing Kennedy. Casts him in a different light than what you are used to.
———————
It’s sitting on my desk. Good read?
I liked it, MJ. Also liked Killing Lincoln.
O’Reilly is killing the wrong people. He should be writing “Killing FDR” and “Killing Wilson” and “Killing Run DMC.”
I think it would enlightening for the left to read about the history of the NRA.
http://www.theblaze.com/stories/2013/01/16/nrthings-you-never-knew-about-the-second-amendment/
how about ‘killing the H2 comments”?
I wouldn’t kill FDR, I’d prevent his polio. I think his life would have gone differently enough to dodge a few boulders he left in his wake.
I have an uncle named David Barton.
Not the same guy, but it’s always weird to see him interviewed.
I often wonder – if the Founding Fathers had built in term limits for the Executive and Legislative branches (maybe even the Judicial branch), would we have seen as much government overreach as we have now?
There’s no telling how long FDR might have stayed in office had he not died.
The Founders assumed that polls were a sufficient term limiter, I suspect. Remember that an elected leader was a new idea at the time, and the idea that you could be “elected for life” either didn’t worry them (because it would imply that the person in the office was doing a good job) or didn’t occur to them (because they thought there was no way the electorate would do it).
Also remember that their electorate was exclusively people with “skin in the game”, i.e. land-owners with at least some assumable future-time orientation and relatively high executive function.
From the “Criminals Be Dumb” files comes this little gem:
http://is.gd/oinNML
The Internet is a wonderful tool for LEOs when it comes to catching idiots…..
Back in the day, being an elected official was doing a duty. It was public service. It wasn’t a doorway into riches and excess.
We need to get back to that.
Car in, can I interest you in my petition to repeal amendments 16 and 17?
Anyone for some Manti Teo girlfriend jokes?
http://www.tigerdroppings.com/rant/display.aspx?p=39265617
LSU is good for something.
ESPN was wall-to-wall fake GF while I was at the gym. Still better than The View.
One of the best ones:
http://thehostages.files.wordpress.com/2013/01/teo-usual-suspects.gif
Jay, I like: SEC real football, real girlfriends.
And of course a picture of AJ and his gorgeous girlfriend.
http://tinyurl.com/a649jgj
I swear this is one of the weirdest stories I’ve ever heard.
Honestly, if a guy was gonna invent a girlfriend, wouldn’t you think he would invent one who was his own personal sex tiger?
Who invents a girlfriend who dies?
That was a good one, mare.
Clint Eastwood was funny, too.
I swear this is one of the weirdest stories I’ve ever heard.
Even Nicholas Sparks couldn’t come up with anything this ridiculous….
I’m not ruling out the gay angle.
He’s a mormon. I watched him spend about 21/2 to 3 minutes in an interview talk about how sweet, special, kind, loving etc., this girl was.
That’s a lot of time in the TV world. If she was so special to him and he received the game ball after her death, why wouldn’t he consider going to her funeral?
Of course that is only one question of about a thousand that would be appropriate to ask.
Has the guy heard of skype? Oovoo? Face time? A plane?
If she was so special to him and he received the game ball after her death, why wouldn’t he consider going to her funeral?
Of course that is only one question of about a thousand that would be appropriate to ask.
“Oh, what a tangl’d web we weave…..”
I need this explained:
Nov. 28, 2009, according to the Oct. 12 South Bend Tribune. It reported the following:
Lennay Kekua was a Stanford student and Cardinal football fan when the two exchanged glances, handshakes and phone numbers that fateful weekend three seasons ago.
“They started out as just friends,” Brian Te’o said. “Every once in a while, she would travel to Hawaii, and that happened to be the time Manti was home, so he would meet with her there. But within the last year, they became a couple. “And we came to the realization that she could be our daughter-in-law. Sadly, it won’t happen now.”
Brian Te’o is the dad.
So dad is in on the hoax as well? Or did the son just tell him that “she” was visiting, and dad never actually met her?
Curiouser and curiouser.
I have about as much interest in this girlfriend story as I have in the Armstrong dealo.
Motherfucker should’ve just gotten himself an inflatable sheep like normal guys do.
Whu……..?
40% of Lance Armstrong’s doping was related to a fake girlfriend.
There. I think I summed up the news this week.
Also, what was that thing mare was supposed to shout instead of COCK!? Something about a anal bleached slut or something.
Yeah, that.
mare is much nicer at AOS than here.
Rush interviewed Nick Searcy and NO ONE TOLD ME ABOUT IT?
xbrad, you’re in trouble.
I have about as much interest in this girlfriend story as I have in the Armstrong dealo.
Sympatico. Though I am left wondering if a making up a fake dead GF is somehow “worse” than doping. Both potentially advance your career, but the fake dead GF isn’t cheating. OTOH, Armstrong’s choice looks saner.
Honestly, I couldn’t care less Leon.
ga.
I like Rush’s little bit he’s had the last few days. He talks non-news stuff and says that if it’s not in TMZ he’s not read about it.
Today he joked that he hadn’t heard about Americans being kidnapped in Algeria, and posited that it meant that surely Obama was going to to head to Vegas. lol
Good day, wretched hive of scum and villainy denizens.
Of course, if a guy can be married to a “lady” for years without ever realizing she’s a dude, I guess anything is possible.
People are gonna believe what they want to believe.
And who’s to say that the writer of that first article in the South Bend Tribune didn’t embellish the story to tug on the heartstrings of readers? The writer may have wanted it to be true – we’ve all seen how some journalists are less than forthcoming with the truth (some even go so far as to invent their own “truth”) when it suits their ego/agenda.
*peels off putrid layer of scum, hides supervillain cape behind sofa*
Hiya, Sean!
How’s tricks?
Tricks are for kids, Teresa. I had a bowl of Honey Bunches of Oats for breakfast today.
Car in, Rush has been doing that since the election aftermath to get low info voters to listen to him and maybe “win” their affection…as if that can happen
Heh. Mr. TiFW just sent me an e-mail telling me I should check out the Nick Searcy “School for Actors” site – “it’s really funny”.
Apparently he hasn’t been reading all of the articles/comments I’ve been forwarding him from you guys and the AoSHQ site the past couple of months…..
I had a bowl of Honey Bunches of Oats for breakfast today.
Shouldn’t that be “Honey Bunches of Gluten”?
*runs far, far away*
Busy day today, I found and applied for 3 jobs in ND and 1 in Missoula Montana. I like Missoula better than Bismark
I had a bowl of Honey Bunches of Oats for breakfast today.
Breakfast cereal, including “granola”, is a cynical marketing ploy by religious fundamentalists to destroy your sex drive.
Regular readers of my awesome blog already know this.
I feel like I’m in a snow globe. Schools and my work closed, Mr. RFH still working. He’s from NJ, he knows how to drive in this shit.
“Dear Abby” died.
Huh. I did not pitch (nearly) any tents after eating breakfast this morning, so you might be onto something there, leon.
I always hated that bitch.
Cereal is a prank by a dead Seventh Day Adventist to stop you from pleasuring yourself, Sean.
In your heart, you know this to be true.
Leon has a blog?
Dear Abby,
Can I wear a white tuxedo jacket with a black tie to your funeral, or are you dead?
Love,
MJ
How about oatmeal Sean? Can I pleasure myself with maple-brown sugar?
Leon has a blog?
Well, I used to. Now it’s 90% workout logs and 10% readable content.
But my blogroll is pretty good.
So eating bacon and eggs for breakfast is best?
Must explain why Mr. TiFW’s grandfather lived to be 95.
Nice to know that I’ve been doing SOMETHING right…..
I recommend the whole article, Teresa, and the blog. Stanton’s writing is very good and thorough.
How about oatmeal Sean? Can I pleasure myself with maple-brown sugar?
Why are you asking me? mr. caruthers is the one with the links to the sexperts.
Oh, my gosh, I love this story, it’s absolutely amazing. The elements in this story are a page long:
Notre Dame
Heisman Candidate
Girlfriend he’s seen but doesn’t exist
She gets in a car wreck then dies shortly of cancer
He’s highlighted on several shows and interviews describing his relationship
After a major football game the coach gives him the game ball, FOR HER
In the 1830s, the Reverend Sylvester Graham preached the virtues of a vegetarian diet to his congregation, and in particular the importance of wholemeal flour. Meat-eating, he said, excited the carnal passions.
Chalk one up for the carnivores!
I’d rather be lusty than dusty…..
Leon will just recommend fucking bacon and eggs
I did read that article, Leon – fascinating stuff.
Site’s been bookmarked as well; thanks for the info!
Sean, I think he wants your permission.
Of course, Americans being kidnapped and killed in Algeria is pretty big news to me too, but I’m still butting my head against the machine over Benghazi.
I actually just skip breakfast most days. On lifting days I take 10g BCAA before the workout and then eat lunch right after. If I’m eating bacon and eggs it’s most likely dinner.
Can I pleasure myself with maple-brown sugar?
If you strategically place it in the right spot, it is entirely possible that you could convince someone to lick it off
I usually have leftovers from the night before or some eggs for breakfast. Haven’t had cereal in years.
The elements in this story are a page long
Thank you for condensing them into six lines! Have you ever considered applying for a job at Reader’s Digest?
The media is a wing of the democrat party. Unless Obama blows his load in the face of an unpaid, 21 year old intern, his behavior will be excused.
Wait…
Has b-rad been around this morning? He might be innarested to know that this is near my place.
Haven’t you heard, Mare? 129 days later we have top men investigating Benghazi.
*warning, link to AP*
http://tinyurl.com/top-men-Mare-top-men
Only works if the intern looks like Mario Lopez, MJ. And even then, it’ll only lose him about 25-50% of his black supporters.
I think his body man was on salary, so…you know, no problem.
Sean, I got tired of listing them. I could go on.
Arizona Pro Football player says he’s met the girlfriend that doesn’t exist
Athletic director cries on TV because Te’o won’t be able to trust again
His parents were either duped too or are involved
Notre Dame is full of ugly women (evidently)
Even if Notre Dame is, South Bend isn’t. I used to work there. Plenty of high-quality tail willing to date a ND football player.
Gay.
The previews for that movie, Mama are creepy.
Yes, add the possibility that he’s gay.
And león based on your MMM’s I’m not sure you’re our prime candidate to pick high quality tail.
Car in, Rush has been doing that since the election aftermath to get low info voters to listen to him and maybe “win” their affection…as if that can happen
I’d noticed he’d been doing it recently, but I didn’t know the backstory. It’s hilarious, actually.
Gay.
That was my thought, too.
hahaha…My computer thoughtfully added the accent to Leons name on it’s own.
And león based on your MMM’s I’m not sure you’re our prime candidate to pick high quality tail.
If Isaac Mizrahi can tell you when a girl is pretty, so can I. The difference is that it’s somehow not assault or 4th-degree sexual misconduct when he feels up ScarJo on a city street.
I was listening to Colin Cowherd in the car, he had ESPN Sports Science’s John Brenkus on. They were discussing Colin Kaepernick’s results in the Sports Science lab. He had off the chart results in almost every category. He beat Cam Newton by the numbers. the guy was raving about him.
What an idiot. First gay football superstar? He could have been more famous, wealthy, and up to his eyeballs in cock than Elton John.
He might be gay, or just asexual and tired of being bothered about it.
Harrumph.
http://reason.com/blog/2013/01/16/how-does-the-sandy-hook-massacre-demonst
http://youtu.be/uTmfwklFM-M
ScarJo
——————-
Are you sure you’re not gay, LeoCo?
I think gay is the only thing that saves his career at this point.
Sean, what’s the dealio on that pic of a Sabre jet? Did you take it? Or just see one flying around? There’s quite a few on the warbird circuit, and some contractor used them until very recently to tow targets for the Navy and the AF.
And a couple years ago, one of the most respected fighter pilots in the world, Dale Snodgrass, just forgot to put the wheels down, and bellied one in at an airshow.
Are you sure you’re not gay, LeoCo?
Positive. Though I did live alone for awhile with two male cats and hung out with a lot of women I wasn’t sleeping with on a regular basis.
I also coordinate colors well and work out a lot.
Crap. Maybe I am. I should consult an expert. Is Rosetta around?
Didn’t take the pic, b-rad. I just saw it on facechimp. It’s over at Planes of Fame in Chino, and the caption said that they’re getting it ready for an event.
http://www.allhatnocattle.net/starfighter.jpg
Dale Snodgrass
I also coordinate colors well and work out a lot.
It’s ok if you are Leon . We could use the diversity.
That’s a negative ghost rider, the pattern is set.
Andre Ware is the THIRD Heisman voter who has said that the girlfriend angle made a difference in his vote. He voted for Te’o. So did the two others I heard this morning, one on Mike and Mike and one on a local show.
Sounds like motive.
Sorry to disappoint. I’m a white hetero male who’s into girls with nice abs and robust hindquarters.
I’m still very strange, though, so I contribute the kind of diversity that doesn’t matter.
Have you ever actually, you know…met a football player, MJ?
Gay may win you points on the red carpet, but not in the locker room.
No offense, Leon.
Te’o almost won the dang Heisman. He sucked that last game and he had a fake girlfriend about whom he discussed on national tv several times. Yikes.
So weird.
Yeah, I was going to say, being gay in football kind of ruins the whole tough guy, bad ass image. And of course I know there have been gay players, but picturing them making sweet, sweet love to another guy, ruins the football stud image. Well, for heterosexuals it does.
DD#3′s kittens must be hillbillies.
The boy cat keeps trying to have sex with his sister.
They have an early-morning appointment with the vet next week.
*coughTEBOWcough*
The jerkwad media and the left (BIRM) are always looking for ways to pussify men. So they find this guy whose girlfriend croaks, and they’re all sympathy and support for his bruised feelings. Then it turns out she’s a fake, and they turn on him like the pack of rabid hyenas that they are.
Is it any wonder I don’t watch TV?
No Woman No Cry.
PUPSTER SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTH!!!!
Have you ever actually, you know…met a football player, MJ?
——————————-
One of my bestest friend’s husband played in the NFL for a number of years.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Parrish
I’m not saying it wouldn’t take a ton of balls, but society would have rewarded him immensely, deserved or not.
Te’o almost won the dang Heisman.
I don’t think it was as close as all of the sportswriters are making it out to be, was it?
Tebow doesn’t have sex because he’s a practicing Christian. Xbrad doesn’t have sex because he’s a practicing stalker.
*coughDanMarinocough*
Tebow is in need of a new team. Any takers?
Xbrad doesn’t have sex because
he’s a practicing stalkerDolly would kill him.FTFY
*raises hand
I don’t have sex with a partner.
The Chiefs need a quarterback.
*shudder*
Te’o is a Mormon.
Now I’m not saying, I’m just saying. Peer pressure in college to party and have fun with girls could be alleviated with a fake internet girlfriend, and convenient built-in excuse to stay home at night on the internet.
Gay or chaste, fake girlfriend is a free pass.
Throw in cancer/car crash / death the same week as grandmama, and you’ve got a story that will get you noticed, in this case, nominated for a freakin’ Heisman Trophy.
I’m not saying it is not a hoax, I’m saying he’s the architect of the hoax.
And he’s as queer as Jewstin at Bed, Bath, and Beyond wearing a feather boa, leather pants, spiked heels, and saying ‘Fabulous’ while smelling all the lotions and bath salts.
*coughCordellStewartcough*
I’ll easily buy the “lie that got away from me” story. The hollywood version of this has been made a few times already, except the guy had a stand-in for the GF that he ends up with and everything’s okay at the end.
I mentioned the mormon angle earlier Pups. Really, it could be he was sick of those Catholic poon hounds…slash…drunkards razzing him about it.
Mike Golic said he didn’t know Te’o well because he didn’t “go out” with a lot of the players.
I saw The Catholic Poon Hounds open for Pat Boone in 1975 at the Ice Palace.
*coughDickButkiscough*
Who is Cordell Stewart?
Awww, “poon” makes me miss Rosetta. Remember his excellent story about the time in 4th grade he kicked a girl in the poon?
hahaha…I don’t know if it was for attention or she was man handling him.
And now, something light and breezy:
http://youtu.be/mOE9fE72QLg
hahahaha…Pupster went to a Pat Boone concert.
Did you wear a neckerchief?
LOL…”less angry version.”
I’ve been this meme: http://i2.wp.com/www.johnphung.com/images/63aa25cc39b8_EC0B/Scooper-on-top.png
Kordell…..aka Slash.
Who is Cordell Stewart?
http://tinyurl.com/a7nvj2n
Leon (sorry, can’t do the accent thingy) what do BCAAs do for you? Will they help gain weight?
Since I’m lifting in a fasted state (16+ hours since my last meal) there’s a chance that prolonged exertion could trigger muscle catabolism as my body goes looking for nutrients to maintain energy levels. BCAAs recently consumed should be readily available, short-circuiting any possible muscle breakdown.
And he’s as queer as Jewstin at Bed, Bath, and Beyond wearing a feather boa, leather pants, spiked heels, and saying ‘Fabulous’ while smelling all the lotions and bath salts.
————————
Funniest thing I’ve read today.
Keep jewstin away from bath salts. He has access to machinery now.
Bath salts and the black bartender kilt it?
Afternoon.
And he’s as queer as. . .
Well! I never!
*Flounces away
I’m making chicken and dumplings for the first time eva. Keep your fingers crossed. So far, so good.
/gets nervous.
Carin, make sure the broth is boiling when you drop in the dumplings, otherwise they get gummy and gross.
/mom
Would someone make me dinner?
I lined the article before, but it’s just so ragingly ridiculous:
Greg Pollowitz @GPollowitz
NYC spends $7000 per yr per kid for school buses? That’s $38 per day. Cabs are cheaper.
/gets nervous
I hope you made your own dough and not bisquick.
Carin, aren’t you supposed to drink wine while cooking to avoid the nerves (and also, if the meal sucks you simply don’t care)?
Jewstin, I keep meaning to try your vindaloo recipe.
G is judgmental.
Mare, want chicken and dumpling? I used Pioneer woman’s recipe.
Mare is a pusher.
I just started the wine, so the not caring is just kicking in.
*pours wine for kids and husband
Good thing this shit comes in a box.
Why is facedouche not working on my iPhone?
Because you won’t answer when I try to Facetime you!
G- I did make my own dough.
FaceTime?
Breaks out in hives.
*calls car in to talk her through FaceTime.
Good. Now, keep them covered in the pot the first 10 minutes. Then throw a sneer towards either Tokyo or Paris, and spin around 3 times.
All of these are critical to good dumplings.
Try it Roamy. It’s excellent.
I went nuts in the spice section, bought garam masala, coriander, and a couple others that I usually don’t buy. I made butter chicken that was awesome.
Hugs Roamy from 30,000 feet!
It’s not as easy as it sounds, but well worth it.
YES!!! Carin, a thousand times, YES!!
>> I went nuts in the spice section
I meant to add, this statement stands on its own.
Why are the majority of the women featured in “House Hunters” such whiny bitches?
I think wine should come in little bags with a pokey hole for a straw.
They just are. And be glad you didn’t get one of the 50% of the episodes that feature some fabulous gay couples.
Also, my nuts are already spicy.
It used to, Jewstin! http://is.gd/Gfttbj
Thanks Connecticut!
http://tinyurl.com/a5eqazx
Huh. The spiffy new Boeing Dreamliner has been grounded because the lithium ion batteries it uses are catching fire.
Do you know why the Postal Service wont let you mail lithium ion batteries?
>> Do you know why the Postal Service wont let you mail lithium ion batteries?
OO! OO! ME, PICK ME I KNOW!
Comment by scott on January 17, 2013 7:35 pm
Do you know why the Postal Service wont let you mail lithium ion batteries?
======
’cause they’re assholes?
You worry too much about laws and stuff. What happened to “don’t ask, don’t tell”?
lithium ion blows up. it’s what it does.
To be fair, Li-ion batteries rarely blow up. Unless they get wet. They do burn well, though.
My lithium tablets have never blown up
you can’t ship it because it may blow up on the plane during delivery, but it will be fine installed in the plane.
MCPO, that legislation is BAAAAAAAD news.
“I went nuts in the spice section, bought garam masala and a couple others”
that sounds kinda racist….
they don’t blow up in a tablet. nice controlled environment. an airplane may be exposed to more varied conditions.
Mare – The good news is it probably won’t go anywhere. But, someone should run against the stupid, leftist, gun-grabbing asshole.
We met a guy who nearly died when his charging laptop caught fire at the foot of his bed.
Fire + Tempurpedic mattress = bad news.
Comment by Mcpo Airdale on January 17, 2013 7:59 pm
Mare – The good news is it probably won’t go anywhere. But, someone should run
againstOVER the stupid, leftist, gun-grabbing asshole.One of our service trucks caught fire because the tech didn’t tape the battery leads correctly. It’s sort of funny to see a burned out fire service van but you shouldn’t laugh about it. Or so I’ve heard.
Dave?
http://www.kens5.com/news/Slidell-police-catch-bucket-wearing-burglar-187187181.html?ref=prev
Evenin’, goobers.
Buckethead!
http://tinyurl.com/3dtc4pp
Anyone remember the name of Hotspur’s daughter’s Etsy shop?
Andy…keep up he good work gun blogging at AoS
Roamy:
http://www.etsy.com/shop/kpglassjewelry?ref=exp_listing
Yes – what Jimbro said, Andy.
I was able to convince my boss to go out and buy now. As in tonight.
Hey Andy. Do you really need that avatar?
Ass jewelry?
Cyn, gracias.
I hear vajazzling has gone out of fashion.
as you can get a Bushmaster for well under $1000,
No, you can not.
Is a .223 a 22?
Pretty much.
220, 221. Whatever it takes.
The .223 Winchester/5.56mm NATO is a centerfire rifle cartridge. The .22LR (long rifle) is a rimfire. While the bullets they use are similar in diameter, the .223 is much more powerful.
>> Hey Andy. Do you really need that avatar?
Nah. I’ll leave it on your mom’s nightstand when I’m done.
And thanks for the kind words. Check’s in the mail.
Sorta, but no. When people speak of a .22, they generally mean a .22Long Rifle rimfire cartridge, pushing a soft 40 grain bullet. A .223 is a bullet that generally weights a bit more, is longer, jacketed, and fired from a much larger case.
I’m getting another shotgun.
MJ,
It’s a little bigger than a .22, with more powder behind it. Most of the .223 ammo shoots a 55grain bullet. Newer loads are up to 62 grain.
Because the bullets are so light, it’s pretty easy to run them up around 3,000 fps.
Anita asked for an AR-15 for her birthday a couple years ago, and got one. She wanted it because she knew how to use it and maintain it, as did I.
It’s easy for her to shoot well and she has a bitchin’ day-scope, and an even better night-scope.
REAL rifles shoot a 180, or so grain .30 caliber bullet at a couple thousand fps. They are much less influenced by cross-winds and are much more effective when you need to “Reach Out and Touch Someone”.
See M1A or M-14…
Just my opinion and worth what you paid.
Did anybody sell anybody else’s passport to a shady-looking foreigner today?
It was a 5 o’clock shadow. . .
*sniffs armpits*
Thanks crispy. I realize this has probably been discussed, but it seems like the left wants to ban things that they know from movies, not actual experience.
It reminds me of a guy I know and respect that thought Oliver Stone’s JFK was basically a historical text the likes of William Shirer.
Kind of annoyed that we’re learning more about Manti Te’o’s fake girlfriend than about Benghazi, the Algerian hostage situation, etc. Bread and circuses.
MJ’s question would be good for Andy’s gun posts. Also centerfire and rimfire. Definitions are always good for people that may read but don’t know. Also gunpowder, where does it come from? Is it good in dumplings?
Also really like your gun threads Andy.
It’s better in won-tons than dumplings!
What Roamy said. 24/7 about fake dead GF. Can’t get a victim count from the Algerian “Rescue” operation. Should that be “dead fake GF?”
I laughed.
http://i.imgur.com/Nojlp.png?1
I know that bullet speed from a pistol is a lot slower than bullet speed from a rifle, but I never got the whole deal that .45 kicks nine kinds of ass while 9mm won’t stop a thirsty goat, and yet there’s this huge run on 5.56mm. I understand the increased speed bringing more kinetic energy to the party concept, but still.
I don’t own a high-powered rifled yet, but when I do I’m probably going with a 7mm Mag.
My gun shoots so slow that unless I buy at least 124 grain ammo, it won’t always chamber the next round after firing.
It took me a few months to figure out the problem cuz iz a paste eater.
Hahaha.
what was the fake girlfriends name?
Lennay Kekua.
My fake girlfriend’s name is, “Mare”.
My fake girlfriend’s name is, “Mare”.
Winner. Jealous of it, but it’s a winning comment nonetheless.
Everybody has had fake Mare.
Some show named king of the nerds just started. looks mildly interesting.
7 mm is a good round. 3000 fps makes a shit ton of hydraulic shock.
The 45 v 9 mil is weight. Mass x Velocity = energy 230 grain 45 is 2x a 115 grain 9 mil.
The V portion of the equation is 1000 fps for 45 vs 1400 for the 9 mil
1.4x speed is not = to 2x mass
Therefor 45 wins PG
Also pi R squared rule
Pie are round! Where the fuck do you find a square pie?
X wins!
Cyn, that joke is suggesting that God isn’t real.
I didn’t laugh. I hate evangelical atheists.
With a name like Lennay, you’re bound to run into trouble.
MJ,
The MSM ALWAYS refers to the AR-15s as “High Powered” rifles. It’s simply not true.
They are weaker than the “VERY OLD” .30-.30 lever-action deer gun. In most states, they are not legal to hunt deer because of the danger of wounded animals running-off to die without being retrieved by the hunter. There are some mods to replace the “Upper” with 6.8mm SPC that will make them “Enough Gun” to hunt game.
As far as VMAX math (I was told there would be no math!), my problem with the 9mm is over-penetration. I shoot the Speer 200 grain “Flying Ashtray” in .45. When it hits something, it expands to .65-.75, dissipates all its energy in the target, and don’t come out the other side.
That way, you don’t have to repair sheet-rock…
Home. Early. Bumped flight schedule, woulda been midnight.
The Dave is happy.
Dave is good
So is Chris
Welcome home, Dave. Did you bring us any presents?
I know what the joke was, Leon.
I laughed because I didn’t think atheists were smart enough to be that clever.
*tosses xbrad the bag of peanuts I half et*
Yay! Dave didn’t die in a fiery crash. Did you get to make your nude snow angel?
I don’t know why, but airline peanuts taste better than regular peanuts. Which is why it pisses me off that most airlines are switching to pretzels. Like I give a shit if some pussy has an allergy and is gonna swell up and die.
I’ve seen the joke before, I guess, they just didn’t use imaginary GF last time.
Plenty of clever atheists. Most of them will smugly tell you so.
I think we need a shirtless Tebow pic to get over Te’o's dead fake GF.
>> Did you get to make your nude snow angel?
On the hood of a Kia.
Mighta dented it some.
Te Bow
http://tinyurl.com/b4zpkfm
Like I give a shit if some pussy has an allergy and is gonna swell up
I am so tempted to go out of context, but the poat’s bulldog puppy is too awesome.
Most of them will smugly tell you so.
Heh. And leftards to boot too.
On the hood of a Kia.
Picture is where??
*impatiently taps foot*
…but the poat’s bulldog puppy is too awesome.
Isn’t he though?!
We should prolly have a new poat between now and bewbs tomorrow.
Not that I’m gonna be the one to do a new one, mind you; we just need a new one.
Oh ♪Wiserbud♫… we could use a quickie music post please.
I think we need a shirtless Tebow pic to get over Te’o’s dead fake GF.
http://thehostages.wordpress.com/2012/01/11/hhd-by-request/tebow_shirtless1/
Oh well done, Roamy!
Pictures?
You don’t want to see what my cold nutsack did to the hood of that car, I don’t care how you complain. I know this is not something anyone wants to see.
You don’t fool me with your “pics?” bullshit.
Ohai
http://tinyurl.com/a6zewkf
HAHA! I assumed that you’da tucked, what with the frigidity of the snow and all, and then I was going to bust you for making a girl angel.
He looks cold. I should warm him oh yes I should.
No I laid em out on the hood and the next morning some girl screamed while I was smokin and warming up my car. With the engine, not my balls.
Either way probably would have worked.
BWAHAHAHAHA!
I don’t want to be all braggy, but the car was mosty toasty when we went to work that morning.
*fuck it’s cold up there though!*
MOM! DAVE MADE ME LAUGH!
There were no Tushars in the new post. Sorry.