Good morning, and welcome to another edition of Hunky Hump Day. Tomorrow is Thanksgiving. We are thankful for the good men in our lives and, for a moment every Wednesday, the hunky men in our fantasies.
The blondes.
The redheads.
The brunettes.
And the none of the above.
Thank you for your attention, and y’all have a good day.
391 Comments
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Foist?
*revs engine, peels out, does rubber-burning victory loop*
this ain’t pismo beach
Okay, who switched the coffee to decaf when I wasn’t looking?
We brined the turkey last night. Tonight, lemon and rosemary rub.
Dog got the gibs for breakfast.
That’s a beatin’
Mmmmm Wednesday Bunk Day. Nice work, Roams!!
Oh, and good morning cool kids.
*curtsies*
Wakey wakey
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XKDnviT0FIQ
I’m letting my dad do the turkey.
you know, because.
But I’m doing the two ducks!
Work time. Don’t set any
onething on fire until I get back.Gibs are to be used in teh gravy. It’s a law ‘er sumpthin’.
Only if you like gravy enough to bother making it.
*sputters at Leon’s nonsense
Quick! What’s zero percent of zero?
Sorry, I don’t like it. I put butter on my taters.
>> But I’m doing the two ducks!
I don’t believe I’d a told that.
MJ, I think that’s infinity or something, or possibly pi.
I suppose that’s true, Leon
*sniffs haughtily*
*sets gravy explosion trap under his chair and walks on, nonchalantly*
Lucky Ducks.
Argentine Lake Ducks
That’s a relief. I was pretty sure I was going to have to deliver bad news.
I have duck in the freezer!
Sorry, I don’t like it. I put butter on my taters.
I don’t eat gravy myself, but the house would REVOLT if I didn’t make gravy. I don’t put it on taters – it goes on the meat. I don’t eat taters anyway.
But that’s all because I’m stupid and over-concerned with my weight, not because I don’t think it’s not delicious.
Meat that needs gravy is poorly cooked. Hard not to do with modern turkey, but there it is. You’re better off buying small turkeys and cooking two properly than you are cooking one giant one. I’ll be shopping for 15 lb birds on Black Friday.
Monica Crowley is engaged. I’m running out of time.
leon, leon, leon. It’s not that the meat NEEDS gravy, it’s just a bit better with it. Different.
But if it has to have gravy, then you need to cook it differently.
Bzzzzzt! You can’t make good gravy if you have a poorly cooked bird. It’s like icing on the cake, or the pom poms of one of Dave’s cheerleaders (if you like that sort of thing); it just adds a little extra ” oh yeah”.
Thanks again for bringing the fryer, Jay. That one was awesome.
It doesn’t need gravy.
It *wants* gravy.
sigh.
Kids these days.
Plus – turkey sammiches. How you gonna do those w/o gravy?
I’m totally in to dark meat.
Turkey sandwiches without gravy? That’s what cranberries are for.
Yeah, fried turkey is something that everyone should get to eat, at least once.
I’ll bet you could convert vegetarians with that stuff.
This gravy issue could seriously be divisive.
*creates exploratory committee to focus group The Gravy Party concept*
Heh:”Say this for Susan Rice: She would be a secretary of state worthy of this administration.”
It’s a good article.
Read more: http://www.politico.com/news/stories/1112/84118_Page2.html#ixzz2Cri7UFNo
This gravy issue could seriously be divisive.
I think it’s time to form the H9
*deletes H8 in a fit of pique
Wait, what happened to H7?
Oh, I see. You’ve moved on. Great. I see where I rate.
My husband was telling me about this – the story behind Hostess union bs:
“Start with the fact that Hostess’s bakery operations are relatively efficient, and though the company planned to sell or close some of the plants anyway, the company had the power to do so already under its union contracts.
Under the latest turnaround plan, the sticking point was Hostess’s distribution operations, source of the Hostess horror stories filling the media. Union-imposed work rules stopped drivers from helping to load their trucks. A separate worker, arriving at the store in a separate vehicle, had to be employed to shift goods from a storage area to a retailer’s shelf. Wonder Bread and Twinkies couldn’t ride on the same truck.
Hostess has spent eight of the past 11 years in bankruptcy. As the company explained to its latest judge, the Hostess brands “have not been able to profit from many of their existing delivery stops and have been unable to enter potentially profitable markets, such as dollar stores, vending services and movie theaters.”"
Separate trucks, basically following each other to distribute product.
I’m just in the process of delurking people and you guys keep moving the site.
Total fucking bullshit.
Movie theaters would have been huge for them. This is a travesty.
Drive time.
Heh, sounds plausible.
Sad that we so readily believe an unbelievable story like that, isn’t it?
the teamsters wanted the bakers to just suck it up, because they had a sweet deal. The bakers wanted to force a bankruptcy because they figure they could finally get a better distribution/marketing plan going and hopefully start operating with a profit.
Otherwise, they were doomed eventually anyway.
http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424127887323353204578128831816783810.html?mod=opinion_newsreel
I have to deal with unions a bit, and some are actually open to doing things differently. Some simply won’t do what is asked of them, no matter if it makes their job easier or keep them employed.
I doubt I’ll ever be in a position to make the call, but if I am, I’m going to sell the portion of our business that uses union labor. It’s always the least profitable and the biggest headache. Plus I have a massive grudge.
They had settled with the Teamsters already, so they are probably more pissed than anyone.
It’s the private equity firms fault for investing in Hostess. If they would have let it go bankrupt, they wouldn’t be going bankrupt.
/logic
S’why you see the animosity between the Teamsters and the Bakers, the Teamsters got to keep their sweet deal for lucrative routes, the drivers get bonuses based on size of the delivery and number of stops.
This was really a fight between the unions. I lived in that c-store delivery world for 19 years, you have to have a large enough delivery to make it worth the stop.
You are falling down here, you can have good gravy and fried turduckhamshrimpin too Do you fry the neck? The wing tips? The giblets? Make gravy with them.
I can’t tell you about how many lame idiotic stupid union rules there are that cost out the wazoo
I put the gravy on the dressing.
French Fries and gravy!
^^^ that too.
*invites Dave to H9
I’m going to make a demi glace. That shit is amazing.
Good gravy.
We’re more of a ‘broth’ family than a gravy family. I like a little tasty broth scattered over the meat, or even the meat sitting in a puddle of broth. And maybe a drizzle of olive oil. If we ever make gravy, it is quite thin. That thick gooey stuff just really never caught on with us.
So I made a velvety broth reduction from last week’s test turkey, strained it, then infused it with lemon and rosemary. Already in the fridge. All I have to do is heat it up tomorrow.
It puts the gravy on its skin.
French Fries and gravy!
I knew Vmax was secretly Canadian.
Heh Leon, is that really a Canadian thing?
They must have left it here on vacation.
Do Ohioans put cinnamon in their gravy?
Which one of you gravy suckin’ pigs wants to wish me a good morning?
That’s what I thought. Fuck y’all.
Oh, man, these sardines are muhflubbin delicious. I must be missing some vitamins
Gravy fries are all over the place in Canada, as I’ve heard it. Often with cheese curds sprinkled over top of the gravy.
Poutin.
Gravey fries? huh.
I’ve seen some weird stuff lately- at work. RANCH dressing on steak.
RANCH dressing on steak.
Next time, record the license plate. I need victims.
I recall some guy in a local diner ordering way too many eggs over-easy, pouring out all the liquid yolks on a separate part of the plate, and mopping them up with tiny pieces of torn toast. Discarded the whites entirely. He did all this as kind of a public spectacle. His girlfriend looked like she was pretty tired of his bullshit.
I like my eggs over easy, and I’m all in on the toast dabbing, but I’m not like a Philistine about it.
And let us not conflate gravy for turkey and dressing, which is brown and has giblets and bits of chicken and hard boiled egg pieces in it, and cream gravy which is the variety used for fries. Ifn you order a chicken-fried steak you get the cream variety and it’s pretty good on fries. Same dealio if you order a steak fingers basket at DQ.
I like my eggs over easy, and I’m all in on the toast dabbing, but I’m not like a Philistine about it.
We are simpatico on this, sir.
I have no idea as to what the fuck else you were talking about there, though. Dressing…whaaa? Cream…gravy?
I think I had something like that on a trip to TX a few years back but at the time I thought it was strange they were serving chowder with biscuits for breakfast, and also that they were pretty fucking stingy with the clams, in any case.
We made burgers with the little banty chicken eggs on them again last night. This time sunny side up so the yolk was pretty gooey.
So good.
Dan likes moco loco. In NM, red chile is traditional for Thanksgiving. Some people call it red chile gravy
Attention carbs: I’m giving myself a break this weekend.
You are warned.
I had a burger with an egg on it, and it was good. I am incorporating that into my diet when available.
moco loco
Loco Moco…. Love this! Haven’t made it in ages either.
Rice bed, then hamburger patty, egg over easy (or SS up) on top of that, then a generous helping of brown (or white) gravy over all of it. I also would do an ice cream-scooped helping of macaroni salad on the side for the authentic flavor since it’s served with just about everything. And yes, you HAVE to use an ice cream scoop to get the look.
*drooooools*
First time I ever had a burger with a fried egg was in Taiwan. I was suspicious at first, but gave it a shot.
Pretty good stuff.
If you use real (heavy) cream to make your gravy, you don’t need any thickeners. True cream gravy has no carbs.
*wanders off with visions of thick-crusted chicken fried steak dancing in head*
Cyn, I call it Moco Loco. Dan makes Hawaiian lunch plate all the time. I think they have a L&L in Phx now.
>> I thought it was strange they were serving chowder with biscuits for breakfast, and also that they were pretty fucking stingy with the clams, in any case.
For biscuits they substitute chunks of sausage for clams.
FWIW, I like my steak to “moo” when I cut into it, but I draw the line at runny eggs. If they ain’t scrambled or hard-boiled, I ain’t eatin’ ‘em.
I think they have a L&L in Phx now.
I’m googling that RIGHT NOW!!!
My favorite breakfast is a huge fucking pile of fried corned beef hash (the real deal, not canned) with two poached eggs in the middle. The yolks have to be runny.
Heaven.
MOTHERDUCKERS!!!
Mare!!!!!
Are you back from some adventure?
Hotspur, have you been to The Bomber in Ypsi? The homemade hash is fantastic. I usually get the “bomberized” plate (2x) with 5 poached eggs and a side of bacon (8 thick slices). Then I go back to the office and try to stay awake.
No, just doing this and that.
Hotspur, there’s a place here that makes homemade hash to die for. Love it.
Comment by MJ on November 21, 2012 9:20 am
I’m going to make a demi glace. That shit is amazing.
Yeah? You should get started then man, you’re late! Isn’t that like a 36-hour odyssey?
Never been to The Bomber, but my bride and I go out for breakfast every Sunday, so we’ll check it out this weekend.
She’s getting all psyched up to use her new double convection oven tomorrow. I hope she doesn’t insist on cooking breakfast on Sunday.
I’m going to make a demi glace. That shit is amazing.
Yeah? You should get started then man, you’re late! Isn’t that like a 36-hour odyssey?
*tears off a corner of MJ’s Man Card*
Had to be done.
Yeah? You should get started then man, you’re late! Isn’t that like a 36-hour odyssey?
————————-
The stock is done. From there it’s a reduction.
MJ’s had so many corners torn off his Man Card that it is now a Man Scrap.
MJ’s had so many corners torn off his Man Card that it is now a
Man Scrapdoily.FTFY
I beg to differ, cooking is a manly thing to do. Even Demi Glace.
*fist bumps MJ
*goes back to planning dinner for Thursday
Good Morning, PG!
And the rest of you.
Good morning, brad.
Are you looking forward to a generous helping of man gravy tomorrow?
That’s pretty funny coming from the only guy in PoL wearing a skirt.
If you were a Real Man™, you’d have a flock of breeding-age hussies carrying your man card on a silver platter elevated adoringly to the sky, a respectful 1½ step behind as you stride purposefully around South of the Border, your path being carefully moistened by the tears of lesser men.
Seems Stark has given this a lot of thought.
Sounds like Stark is describing a guy who’s dick he wants to suck.
Real Men™ don’t use the word moistened.
*tackles steve_in_hb, steals his weed*
Stark’s ideal.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vN-ttCBHyx8
My mother tried to take my weed once. Once.
Mama used to take the gibs and cook them up, finely chop them, then incorporate that into the stuffing. mmmMMMMmmmmm good
I almost bought a big tub of chicken livers yesterday.
Almost.
Can’t decide if I want to fry them up or make charcuterie.
Mrs. Orwell likes to make chicken liver pâté. We’re off the hook Thursday; MIL and crew are catering the food and all we have to do is show up.
Steve posts show tunes to illustrate the man card. Figures.
“A Funny Thing Happened” is still a favorite movie. Even decades later, a classic. Zero Mostel and the kid shopping for concubines. Who wouldn’t love that scene?
Well, maybe Rosetta.
“I know that sound… And I love it!”
http://youtu.be/NENSzTvsyL8
Ok, I guess I have to start planning what I’m going to cook soon.
Apparently, I now have an official shit-load of people coming.
whateve.
How many is an official shitload?
Do you count liberals as three-fifths of a person?
nothing like waiting til the last minute
I like the added pressure, J’ames.
I have my 7, plus my dad. His wife is coming. My brother – who is apparently bringing “friends” (two? Three? Who knows?).
Then my sister, her son, my mom and my aunt.
The last four are all liberals, so the total is somewhere between 12 to 16 people.
St Pete is crazy. You shod see the conflagration of weirdos at the car wash.
Humphrey School of Public Affairs reports:
A Smart Politics analysis of 83 general election cycles dating back to 1850 finds that the Democratic Party now comprises a larger percentage of Californians and New Yorkers in the U.S. House than at any point since California joined the Union.
If you don’t castrate Clownifornia, it’s going to breed all over the rest of the nation. The GOP is effectively dead here.
It was going to be just us, my dad and his wife.
Feed them hope. Or change.
Ive got to run to the bank.
Someone make up a grocery list for me. Have it ready when I get back.
Things I learned from gambling: There’s a college in the US that’s named Furman. Which sounds to me like a slang term for a guy who’s in to hairy women.
I have returned successfully from the gym. The office census dropped precipitously in my absence.
Steyn. The man is indispensable.
From the deplorably parochial coverage in the U.S. media, you’d almost get the impression that those iconic American delicacies of Twinkies and Wonder Bread have ceased production. That’s not true. They’ve just ceased production for Americans. Up north, the streets are paved with Twinkies, and every Canadian is walking in a Winter Wonderbreadland:
(Quote begins)Twinkie and Wonder Bread lovers in the U.S. can still head north of the border to stock up on the baked goods even with the bankruptcy of Hostess Brands Inc.
Saputo Inc. (SAP), Canada’s largest dairy processor, has the trademark and brand rights to Hostess CupCakes and Hostess Twinkies in the country and manufactures the products themselves, said Sandy Vassiadis, a spokeswoman for the company.
“It’s totally separate,” she said, in an interview from Saputo’s headquarters near Montreal. “We own the rights in Canada so what’s happening in the U.S. doesn’t affect us.”
It’s threads like this that really make me hate this place….
I Wonder (heh) if Canadian and Messican Twinkies will be/are made with sugar rather than HFCS. This might be an improvement.
It’s threads like this that really make me hate this place….
And yet, here you are.
Proof that liberals have liberal pets.
http://cdn.dogshaming.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/0152.jpg?4c9b33
And yet, here you are.
not for very much longer….
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rtkdo7bOmJc
Unless they herd animals, kill pests, or keep away burglars, most pets are liberals.
so… blowing up buses DOES work…
Good to know.
http://news.msn.com/world/hamas-israel-agree-to-truce-in-gaza-officials-say
Unless they herd animals, kill pests, or keep away burglars, most pets are liberals.
This is why it’s only common sense to treat liberals like pets. You know. You wouldn’t let a dog vote, and it’s a good idea to spay them.
Zero Mostel and the kid shopping for concubines.
Didn’t that “kid” grow up to originate the role of the Phantom in Phantom of the Opera?
He was also in the movie version of “Hello, Dolly!”
I’ve never seen “Hello, Dolly.”
He was also in the movie version of “Hello, Dolly!”
Leave my “home movies” out of this.
Somehow I think that Hamas realized that Israel’s next step was actually gonna be blowing them to Kingdom Come.
They’re (Hamas) kinda like a little brother/sister. They pick at their older sibling, the older sibling takes it as long as they can, then little sister takes it one step too far and Big Sis unloads on ‘em.
Of course, little sis screams, Mom gets in the middle and tells Big Sis that she should know better.
A “truce” is reached.
Eventually, though, Mom gets tired of mediating, and tells Big Sis – in little sis’ presence – that the next time little sis bugs her, she has Mom’s permission to wale on her until she learns her lesson.
Little Sis claims that she won, but the truth of the matter is that she knows that Big Sis is just waiting for her chance to beat the everloving shit out of her, so she wisely leaves her alone.
For a while.
Hello, Dolly!
http://youtu.be/frl5smXnBIE
He was also in the movie version of “Hello, Dolly!”
Leave my “home movies” out of this.
Your blow-up companion is Barbra Streisand?
*runs far, far away*
For a while.
do you honestly believe this is actually going to happen? That the missile attacks on Israel are honestly going to stop? That the Palestinians are going to stop kidnapping Israeli citizens and soldiers?
oh, how I envy you your niaveté
AOS:
Democratic Racial Physicists Discover Newest Racial Code Word: “Incompetent”
Some of my best friends are incompetent.
What oughtta happen: http://youtu.be/mEqniEvNcnk
L: Hamas, R: Israel
Oh, hell no, Wiser – I’m just saying that Hamas is “claiming” that they’ve reached an “agreement” with Israel so that they look like they’ve won some sort of concession from those dirty Jooooooos.
I know they’re not going to stop.
But this sort of thing looks “good” to all of the Pali worshipers/fellow travelers in liberal la-la land.
And all that matters is that they are allowed their fantasies.
Heaven forbid they should actually have to face real facts……
GO, it’s interesting that the GOP uses code words all the time, but only gives decoder rings to liberals.
FWIW, “for a while” with my sister usually lasted less than an afternoon.
She finally wised up when I kicked her so hard that I broke her little finger.
Of course, I was the one who got in trouble…..
(To her credit, she always admitted that she brought it on herself)
What oughtta happen: http://youtu.be/mEqniEvNcnk
L: Hamas, R: Israel
Perfect
The Dems use codewords all the time too, XBrad. Observe:
Social Justice = theft
Fairness = theft
affordable (housing/healthcare/food) = theft
Collective Salvation = theft
See?
ethnomathematics = theft
anti-racist mathematics = theft2
That last one is tricky, but it’s not anti-racist and it’s not math, you get a squared term. I can show you the formal proof if you like.
But this sort of thing looks “good” to all of the Pali worshipers/fellow travelers in liberal la-la land.
All I heard on the on-the-half-hour news reports yesterday was “So far, over 100 Palestinians have died, and one Israeli soldier has been killed.”
Fucking media doing their job of going about 1mm deep with the story top get the narrative they want. Big Evil Israel killing innocent, peace-loving Palestinians.
How about you MFM douchebags add up all the people killed by Pali terror attacks before Israel finally says “ENOUGH!” and fights back? Where’s the non-stop, top of the headline pictures of the women and children injured by Pali missile attacks, like we see of those poor, poor Palistinians innocents who have been (maybe, possibly, perhaps) injured over the last week?
Okay, I’ll stop. my BP is rising and I have to go work at the store now. Maybe the idiot lib can tell me again how the Jews should just move and everything would be okay…
Leon, the linguistic calculus is not commutative.
Fairness = theft
but
Theft = tax cuts
I thought the accepted code word was “shiftless”…..
“Incompetent” is an equal-opportunity term of derision.
Maybe the idiot lib can tell me again how the Jews should just move and everything would be okay…
I’ve said before that I’d happily let them move here. It won’t solve the problem, but I’ve seen what those people can do with a shithole plot of desert surrounded by enemies, and I’m willing to let them do it here.
I’ve said before that I’d happily let them move here.
But then the Palestinians go back to being the poor white trash of the ME. The country cousins that nobody wants around the house come
Christmas TimeRamadan.Then they can’t be victims any more.
They don’t want THAT.
I used to think we should just give them Fed land in our desert, but we could trade them Israel for San Francisco. The SF’ers will still have a western beach coast. They might not even notice.
>> Somehow I think that Hamas realized that Israel’s next step was actually gonna be blowing them to Kingdom Come.
Hardly. Their combat effectiveness has been impaired, so they ask for a time out so they can regroup and resupply.
Greetings, cakes of beef.
Greetings, cakes of beef.
That’s not frosting.
Netanyahu on now…
regroup and resupply
Bingo Boingo
There is a supermassive incompetent hole at the center of the galaxy.
I used to think we should just give them Fed land in our desert, but we could trade them Israel for San Francisco. The SF’ers will still have a western beach coast. They might not even notice.
We could send those “Queers for Palestine” people.
That would work out famously.
Massive Thanksgiving meal at work has been consumed. We do it a little differerntly here, Tex-Mex. Fajitas, enchiladas, chiles. I shunned the chips and tortillas. I did give myself a small slice of pecan pie.
Heh. And they think not being allowed to walk around the Castro with their naughty bits flopping around is incipient fascism…
Heh. And they think not being allowed to walk around the Castro with their naughty bits flopping around is incipient fascism…
What if, when jailed, they are allowed to go nude? Would that be actual fascism or incipient freedom?
There is a supermassive incompetent hole at the center of the galaxy.
This is an unproven and racist theory.
I’m baking pies. Pies you cannot have.
Also, if you want to see my Man Card™, I apologize for not having it on me: I think I left my wallet at your mom’s house.
How about they’re allowed to be nude when they’re buried up to their heads and stones?
I’m making pumpkin cheesecake and chocolate pie tonight.
Smoking turkey in the morning. Dressing, bread, veggies, gravy later.
There is a supermassive incompetent hole at the center of
the galaxyDC .FTFR
I’ve been running around all day doing things that have NOTHING to do with preparing for Thanksgiving, and I have to drive to Detroit tonight for my mom’s birthday.
Sigh. And then everyone’s coming to my house.
WTF.
Honestly.
Now, granted … I did procrastinate, but I thought it was just going to be us here.
I’m baking pies. Pies you cannot have.
Perhaps you didn’t hear about Obama’s mandate.
You didn’t bake that all by yourself.
Who made the grocery list for me?
Chop chop.
You must spread the pie wealth around.
That didn’t come out right.
(Neither did that, now that I think about it)
Oh, Hell – just hand over the pies, and nobody gets hurt.
Car in’s list:
Bread
Rolls
Gravy in a can
Packaged gravy
Frozen solid turkey
4 cans pureed pumpkin
bag of brown sugar
package of paper clips
white out
white sheets
1 long 2X4
1 short 2X4
nails
lighter fluid
More to come…
Who made the grocery list for me?
Turkey
Pork sausage
Yukon Gold potatoes
granny smith apples
Club soda
Cointreau
Jose Cuervo 1800 Reserve Silver
Limes
Drink the last 4 items, leave the rest in the fridge until Friday.
what about a can of cranberry sauce.
I’m a purist.
You forgot rope.
Jose Cuervo 1800 Reserve Silver
Barbarian. At least get Anejo on the list.
I could solve the Palestinian problem easily.
Print this letter 1,000,00,000 times and mail it to every address in Gaza:
Dear Spiritual Brother,
The guy living next to you is an Israeli spy. You know what to do for allah and the 1000 years of history or whatever. You’ll get totally laid in heaven by really inexperienced girls, which sounds kind of stupid now that I think about it.
You’ll get laid a lot and it will be whatever fetish you want. Swearsies.
Love,
Your Local Hamas Guy
PS: I’ve also sent you this vest from the GAP. And this belt.
Buy a jug of cranberry juice. Mix with the last 4 ingredients from previous list and proceed as previously advised.
Barbarian. At least get Anejo on the list.
I was trying to economize. That’s the lowest shelf I’ll drink.
So, frack the asparagus, etc?
Just buy alcohol?
got it.
Eggs
Flour
Milk
July, 1985 Penthouse
6 car batteries
Brown sugar
45 rpm vinyl “Brown Sugar” by The Rolling Stones
1 lb. each: Pastrami, roast beef, China white heroin
Sourdough rolls
Cumquats (heh!)
Baseball signed by the 1973 Montreal Expos
Italian dressing
chloroform
ether
acetone
ammonia
hydrochloric acid
methylamine, iodine
hydroiodic acid
lithium or sodium
mercury
hydrogen gas
And a big plastic bucket. Like 20 gallon.
Who made the grocery list for me?
Turkey, 2 at 12# eaPepperidge Farms, Herb
Sausage Chub
17# Butter
Flour
Foil
Pam
Celery
Onion
Chick Broth & Bullion Cube Thingies
Duct Tape
Juicy Fruit
Limes
Darden Restaurant Gift Cards, 4 @ $50 each
*reminds self not to eat at Sean’s house*
July, 1985 Penthouse
The October issue was better. I heard.
Huh. I guess Cyn already had a Sausage Chub.
Hmm, sausage chub.
Nah, too easy.
4 bags of salt and vinegar Lay’s
Case of Slim Jim’s
Tub of beef heart
Playtex rubber gloves
Hello Kitty DVD
Nice!
Where’s Rosetta’s list?
And a big plastic bucket. Like 20 gallon.
Which kind? I don’t want another mistake like I had with the bathtub.
I made up a master grocery list years ago for T-day/Christmas and just stuff it in my Joy of Cooking book. Pull it out every year, survey, viola and fin.
Man, that episode was AWESOME!
I was thinking that too, Jay. That bastage.
Where’s Rosetta’s list?
Hidden on H3?
I did the same thing with my copy of The Necronomicon, Cyn. What a timesaver!
survey, viola and fin.
—
I did the same thing with my copy of The Necronomicon
I’m hearing the music of Erich Zann.
71 AT&T directory assistance workers laid-off in CT
Union leader accuses company of putting profits before people.
D’uh.
Hey, stupid? See: Hostess
No money = no profit = no company = no people required.
Seriously, when is the last time anyone has used directory assistance?
Seriously, when is the last time anyone has used directory assistance?
Let me call 411 to find out.
411: The Ding-Dongs of the telecommunication business.
*sheds a brief tear for Ding-Dong and Ho-Hos*
Union leader accuses company of putting profits before people.
I agree. I mean, the company could have easily reassigned them all to the rotary phone repair division.
Where is the sympathy for the displaced horse and buggy worker? Oh the humanity!
We gave up on the traditional Thanksgiving deal years ago once it became a massive hassle trying to organize schedules with family and family’s families.
Now we serve Thanksgiving BRUNCH, complete with scrambled eggs, sausage, biscuits and gravy and bucketloads of BACON !!!
Brunch!
http://bit.ly/RUw3Nr
I stopped calling them for information, they don’t know squat.
BWAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!
poor Dave…..
http://tinyurl.com/b7e559a
My b-in-law is learning to play bass. I should warn him.
Since my boy learning bass guitar is only 11, I’m actually pretty okay with that slutchuck going elsewhere.
He should learn viola instead. Girls who play strings are often pretty hot, or at least nerdhot.
I prefer nerdhot.
Plus, he could keep back the Elder Gods at the edge of the world. That’s gotta at least get you some sympathy ‘tang.
http://www.gocomics.com/basicinstructions/2012/11/21
sympathy ‘tang
HA!
*puts Leon on the “Oh Noes You Diin’t/MommaBear KillRightFuckingNow List*
Is it wrong that I laughed out loud that Charlie Bolden is bragging that NASA employees have the highest job satisfaction of any federal agency? Dept. of Agriculture must be slitting their wrists, and Dept. of Education is curled up on the couch, listening to The Smiths.
roamy, tell us! What did they find on Mars?
My bet is some kind of organic compound.
Someone was saying that it could be absence of life, but I’m not buying that. The same folks from the Viking program would be saying we haven’t looked in the right place yet.
The dark street glistened moistly from the fog, as the gay old community slept peacefully, their puckered anuses gradually healing from the abuse. Slowly down the street inched your mom, leaving a delicate trail of chicken bones & greasy fingerprints on the architecture reminiscent of Phil Collins’s streak through 1980s pop music.
“That pasty fat fucker.” thought Detective Mandigo, as your mom tripped over a thick, brown hose lying in the street & trailing up the side of the office building where it originated in the shabby office on the 8th floor. Like a flash, the revolver was in Detective Mandingo’s hand and the tattered 12″ single of Sussudio hanging on the wall suddenly sported 3 new holes.
Your mom slowly picked herself up from the sidewalk & removed the cardboard bucket from her face. The still night was the only witness to the befuddled stare your mom focussed on the last scrap of breading that had trickled from the bucket and was now lying on the massive cock flopped across the block.
Mom! Someone swiped Stark’s meds again!
I think stark comes up with those spam messages you find on message boards.
What did they find on Mars?
A wormhole, spitting lost socks, and below it, a mountain of lost socks.
Uncle Bill?
Needs lacewigs.
What did they find on Mars?
Xbrad’s next actual real-life honest-to-goodness girlfriend?
Merkins
Waldo!
Icy Cold Stainless Steel Artificial Fingers
Icy Cold Stainless Steel Batons
Icy Cold Stainless Steel Testicle Hammers
Icy Cold Stainless Steel Nipple Clamps
Icy Cold Stainless Steel Rape Whistles
Icy Cold Stainless Steel Wheel Bearings for Bondage Pony Carts
What did they find on Mars?
Jimmy Hoffa’s remains?
Brrrrrrr
*installs anti-Stark alarm in Orwell family coffin*
Atlantis
Amelia Earhart
Obama’s school transcripts
All those ships and planes lost in the Bermuda Triangle. Bazing!
*gives Geo. a nod and golf claps*
My stash.
Trust LauraW to post only the most relevant and pressing stories of the day at AOS.
Am I the only one that finds irony in a discovery on Mars being described as Earth shaking?
Here’s what Curiosity found:
http://tinyurl.com/b4cgw8a
This is a Dirt-sharting discovery for NASSA.
Discovery on Mars
http://tinyurl.com/au5r23g
The demon NetFlix has suggested I may enjoy a Korean dramatic TV series entitled Vampire Prosecutor.
Challenge accepted.
TV series entitled Vampire Prosecutor.
Does it feature Judge Ito?
Am I the only one that finds irony in a discovery on Mars being described as Earth shaking?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8ED4dQvzPqY#t=03m12s
Perhaps Curiosity stumbled upon a good script for “John Carter of Mars.”
Does it feature Judge Ito?
Judges, is this racist? What am I saying, of course it is.
Y’know, when I put parental controls on the PPV, I didn’t know it was going to be PARENTAL controls.
Surprise!
Tonight’s pot roast is roasting. In the pot.
For BiW, no one else click.
http://youtu.be/q6YZo0ZIGSU
http://tinyurl.com/a75auhe
What did they find on Mars?
The box that holds the tattered remains of Wiser’s virginity?
FIL keeps hitting some button on the TV remote that brings up only the PPV channels. That and the PETA loon talking about sexually abused turkeys are all I need with the kids in the room.
**saves for therapy
Any medical professionals lurking about this fine evening?
DD#3 got her bloodwork back, and it appears her Epstein-Barr Virus VCA-IgG is about 6.7X the higher limit (hers is 128; normal range is 0-19).
All of her other EBV levels are within range – althought the EA-IgG is skirting the high limit – and the lab sheet says “See Comments”.
Unfortunately, there is no “Comment” sheet, and her doctor’s office is closed for the next few days.
I’m sure it’s nothing (she has been tireder than normal the past couple of months), but I had Mono when I was her age, and she’s getting ready to go to England for 6 weeks.
Any help that you can give me would be greatly appreciated – the stuff on the Internet regarding this is wishy-washy at best…..
Today’s checklist:
1.Wake up, make coffee, drink entire pot of coffee and refuse to share with Sister #2 who is visiting. – √
2. Post stupid shit to personal blog. – √
3.14 Thaw pot roast. – √
Fore! Attempt funneh at H2. Fail. – √
Five for Fighting. Pick up digital cable box at TWC (being sure to get lost on the way, because, as a real man, I disdain looking at a map to see just where the fuck TWC office is). – √
¥. Take Sister #2 to lunch at PF Changs because I’ve got $8 left on a $50 gift card that the neighbors gave to Xmom. Put the balance on Xmom’s credit card. – √
7 . Stop at Big 5 Sport and get 100 rounds of 115gr 9mm because one of my blog readers invited me to go shooting Friday, and only a real shitheel would show up with no ammo when shooting someone else guns. – √
H8. Install new digital cable box, being sure to smash one finger to a bloody pulp in the process, and listen to the unhelpful advice of Sister #2 that the box doesn’t work, despite the fact she was standing there right the fuck next to you when the guy at TWC told you the box would take five minutes to boot up, and then call to activate the box. Additionally, listen to the bitching of Xmom how the new remote control is too complicated to operate and “this thing doesn’t work!” even though it totally does. – √
Nein! Start pot roast, peel carrots, onions, potatoes. – √
Zen. Prep turkey, stuffing, etc. for tomorrow.
Elvis. Go on 1 ZipCode (Zip+4) killing spree.
12. Drink cheap bourbon heavily and watch Monday’s episode of Castle.
Teresa, that sounds like prostate cancer.
Castle was good, XBrad!
I rubbed the turkey. I rubbed it so much.
*glares jealously at turkey*
rubber ducky
Ah shit, Detective Hwang just got stabbed.
Shit just got real.
Was Det. Hwang stabbed with a wooden stake through the heart? I mean, it’s Vampire Detective, right?
I just finished rubbing my meat, all 12 lbs of it.
sexually abused turkeys
——————–
Hahahahahaha!
I just finished rubbing my meat, all 12 lbs of it.
When you have sex, what do you do? Wear a weather balloon?
Scott, you better get that looked at.
I’m looking at it, it’s fine
Did anybody espouse a revisionist history of anybody else’s favorite holiday today?
Hwang is just a detective. The prosecuting attorney is the vampire. Hwang got knifed. Looks like he survived, though.
When Scott is elderly he won’t need a walker, he’ll need a wheelbarrow.
Did anybody espouse a revisionist history of anybody else’s favorite holiday today?
St. Patrick didn’t really get all the snakes out of Ireland. It was those damnable protestants.
Tomorrow is going to be interesting.
listen to the bitching of Xmom how the new remote control is too complicated to operate and “this thing doesn’t work!” even though it totally does.
Deja vu.
Also, MJ, I wish I was kidding. No shit, the PETA guy accused turkey farmers and processors of abusing the turkeys.
Keep fucking that
chickenturkey.I’m gonna abuse some turkey tomorrow.
I always thought the snakes left the Emerald Isle because they had it up to here with potatoes.
I’m gonna call Turkey Protective Services right now.
XBrad, you might want to set up the parental controls before Xmom ends up paying $9.95 for “Slutty Stewardesses IV” by accident. Seriously, FIL has found that screen five times since I got home from work.
15 lbs of turkey on the egg, and 12 lbs of beef on the smoker/grill.
This is either going to be a Christmas miracle or an epic holiday fail.
Seriously, FIL has found that screen five times since I got home from work.
And you still think it’s accidental.
Gotta run. Try not to burn each other’s garages down while deep frying turkeys while I’m gone.
Commercially raised turkeys have such large chests that they can no longer breed naturally, so they have to harvest semen manually to impregnate the hens. Is that what they’re referring to?
We do that for cattle all the time. It’s creepy but it’s hardly sexual abuse.
Scott is having some performance anxiety, since he will be presenting his meat to my family for the first time.
It’s creepy but it’s hardly sexual abuse.
Careful, you’ll get Rosetta all horny.
Hey Laura, did you get the chicken livers? When I was a kid, they used to sell a box of fried chicken livers at the local fried chicken place. I don’t know when they stopped, but you just don’t see that anymore.
Scott is having some performance anxiety, since he will be presenting his meat to my family for the first time.
Good God, woman! Will nothing satisfy your clan’s appetites?!?
I did not get the livers, pepe. Too many other cooking projects in the foreseeable future.
George, they are very understanding people. It will be fine, no matter what.
The pros use a fluffer or stunt meat if necessary.
Keep fucking that
chickenturkey.Turfucken.
It’s been years since I presented my meat to the in laws.
http://imgfave.com/view/2670489
That’s awesome Pepe.
I browned my meat earlier.
http://imgfave.com/view/2670489
OMFG does Mrs. Orwell need that.
Everyone in Korea has a Blackberry.
If you must present your meat to in-laws, be mannered. Make sure none of it spills on the tablecloth, and make sure it looks attractive. Perhaps some parsley on top.
I was pretty surprised at how cheap 9mm ammo was. About $0.34 a round. Sure, it’s crappy FMJ stuff, but that’s still less than I was expecting.
And you still think it’s accidental.
On the TV remote at his house, you hit “guide” to get the guide (derp) and hit “guide” again to turn it off. On mine, first time gets the guide to all channels, second time gets the guide to subscribed channels, third time gets the guide to PPV channels, with all the pron channels up first. He can’t tell the difference between the all and subscribed, so he just keeps on going. He gets to the PPV screen, then decides to hit “OK” instead of “exit”. He’s dropped everything but the f-bomb, too.
http://imgfave.com/view/2670489
Lordy, yes.
The hell with it.
The meat is done when the meat is done.
Dinner will be sometime between noon and 6.
We have the meat, we make the rules.
“Naughty Nurses 58″ wasn’t bad on PPV.
>> I’m looking at it, it’s fine
Sheesh man, at least wear an apron. You’re around food.
We have the meat, we make the rules.
*sends Scott extra man card points*
Scott, aren’t you going to tenderize that meat?
“Naughty Nurses 58″ wasn’t bad on PPV.
You paid for that and stole One Tree Hill? Loser.
That may have been too harsh. I might be drunk.
Leon, my followup comment was going to be, who the hell PAYS for porn?
Tenderize? That’s a fallacy.
If you’re apologizing to xbrad about a OTH joke, you’re fucking smashed.
phallusy
jerk
“Naughty Nurses 58″ wasn’t bad on PPV.
****
You paid for that and stole One Tree Hill? Loser.
Okay, you are responsible for red wine spraying all over the Bokhara rug.
OK, good, I was seriously worried you’d paid to see it.
No conservative should pay for for porn. Stealing it helps to cripple the industry.
I just finished rubbing my meat, all 12 lbs of it.
http://is.gd/APwrkb
I think the last time I paid for porn was a copy of Hustler in 1993.
Everybody paid for porn back in the 1990s and early 2000s.
I remember reading that somewhere.
I read trashy romance novels.
OMG! I forgot to make the green jello!!!!
OMG! I forgot to make the green jello!!!!
I hope you have sufficient vodka.
What happens this Thursday when Petraeus asks his wife “Would you like some stuffing, dear?”
“OMG! I forgot to make the green jello!!!!
I hope you have sufficient vodka.”
Don’t forget the carrot-shavings!
green jello!!!!
Holy shit, you’re joking, right? Nobody really eats that. Stop it.
Well, turns out I’m NOT to wear my Animosity International T shirt to Thanksgiving dinner with the in-laws.
Holy shit! What a fuckin’ dumbass!
http://savannahnow.com/column/2012-11-21/vandevelder-let-georgia-secede-why-not#comment-form
This guy is so fookin stupid that he does not realize where wheat, corn, beef, pork, gas, or oil comes from.
Oh, I guess that’s redundant. He’s a leftard…
Heh. Mrs Pepe laid the smacketh down!
How’s your turkey, Laura?
http://tinyurl.com/b8w5pzq
I have been waylaid and mugged by a bottle of Jameson. That is all.
Mantalk
http://youtu.be/bcNGYRKBfHA
Herself made 2 apple pies(1 crumble, 1 crust) and cheese olive balls. She is a fantastic baker/chef.
Pecan pie and cornbread are done.
Greta tonight: Bolton, Bucannin(sp) Liz Cheney, McCain, Graham on foreign policy. Awesome…
Holy shit, you’re joking, right? Nobody really eats that. Stop it.
Nope, no joke. I apparently fell in love with it when I was a little boy of 3 or 4. In our family, it even bears my name.
I decided to make it carb free hoping that Axeman would try, but he said ‘no’, so it’s been made w/o the cream cheese (didn’t buy any). Just pears, pear juice, and sugar free lime jello. No freaking carrot shavings.
I got Googleboy (the oldest) to help with the rest of the stuffing making work so that’s done now too.
Cocktails and debriefing time!
Finished making the pumpkin pie, the whipped cream (dessert comes first), brining the turk now, and prepped the casseroles and the bread for tomorrow.
Also, hope y’all have a wonderful Thanksgiving
I have no idea what the cream cheese would be for in there, but I trust you.
Mantalk
My how times have changed.
http://youtu.be/as-whCYL4ns
Dinner will be sometime between noon and 6.
I hope you have enough wine.
You too, Aggie!
Have a Happy Thanksgiving everybody.
Here is the best public service announcement evah:
http://www.theblaze.com/stories/this-is-the-viral-australian-dumb-ways-to-die-psa-that-glenn-beck-loves-and-will-be-stuck-in-your-head-all-day/
And to you as well, G Mo.
One of the boys showed that Dumb Ways To Die vid to me last week. Ha!
http://imgur.com/gQIO7
Cyn, if that was Sox, there would have been bloodstains on the paper from where he clawed at me “playfully.”
Haha, I think I’m related to Cyn, because that’s one of my favorites, green jello with pears. Also a favorite of my nephew (and godson).
And I didn’t make it this year, either.
I think the blood stains might have been just out of frame.
I’m gonna miss that cream cheese layer in my green jello. Dammit. I should have asked sooner. Oh well, more room for PIE.
I always just look at the green jello. I never think anything about it. After a second I move on to the corn casserole.
Mmm, the pumpkin cheesecake just came out of the oven, time to cool for 45 minutes.
Who is having homemade sausage in their dressing?
*this guy
My butt is beat. I got permission to work an earlier shift tomorrow and have worked 5 hours over, in order to leave early.
Happiest-est of Thanksgiving everyone! My kids are home (gosh I miss them when they aren’t )!!
(I’m hoping the sil keeps the dogs in the basement during our visit)
Corn Casserole. It’s not really a vegetable, you know. It’s a fake vegetable.
Happy Turkey Day to you to, beasn!
Homemade? Oooo, well done, Jay!
Gobble, gobble, Beasn!
I have to make corn casserole one of these holidays. I like it when relatives from Oklahoma make it.
Just took the apple pie out of the oven. We’re good to go.
–Will be making our own turkey dinner on Saturday, so the son can take home leftovers….*he’s so skinny*–
I make this puffy scalloped corn thing for Scott once in a while; wonder if it’s the same as corn casserole?
Who is having homemade sausage in their dressing?
*this guy
Is that Experimental Meat?
Haha, not from the lab this time, made this batch myself.
**psst, Laura, it’s hobo. Corn-fed, too.
Oops.
http://www.damninteresting.com/lake-peigneur-the-swirling-vortex-of-doom/
If we ever host Thanksgiving Dinner, I’m going to dispense with this roasting a whole birdzilla bullshit.
So unnecessary. I’m doing cutlets, and herbed ground loafs.
*claps hands with finality; a dwarf transcribes my dictata*
Cyn, I hope the Axeman has a great day tomorrow. First Thanksgiving with “The Sugar” can be tough for adults. Squishy hugs!
Guten abend, home slices.
Corn casserole is canned and creamed corn mixed with cornbread mix and sour cream, and cheddar cheese, then sprinkled with cheese and baked.
Happy Thanksgiving to you all my friends. Specially those that miss kids and have em home. I know how ya feel.
Hello, Andy.
How did your first gun post at AoS go? I wasn’t going to wade through a gazillion comments just to say I liked my 10/22.
It was good. Very well received by the Horde.
I’m working on another one for the weekend.
Happy Thanksgiving Beasn
Why are you locking the pups in the basement? Are you my SiL?
Xbrad, the family is going to Texas for Christmas this year, but I think I’m still coming to PS for New Year’s as a side trip.
Liked the gun post. Thanks, Andy.
When I read Andy’s link on the 10-22 I wept. I sold my favorite heavy hammer forged barrel 10-22 waaaaaaaaaaaaay to cheep.
I did pay the bills last month thanks to it and a Kimber
I think beasn is allergic to doggehs.
I’m suspecting SiL’s dogs aren’t as well behaved as Vman’s.
Andy, Texas sounds fun, but if you do show up, we’ll have to drink (and drink Sean’s share, as well).
Oso
My family has finally wised up. My SiL has a HUGE family. We have been assimilated by the borg collective and have holidays at the hive.
That is nice but there is no leftovers. So we have a Vmax family dinner and pass out goodies for leftovers the day before.
I scored the turkey carcass tonight so the crock pot is cooking it into stock and I have a plate full of turkey sammies!
We’re going to Texas to get the Mrs.’ recently-deceased grandmother’s house on the market, so it might not be very fun.
But, yeah, we should make Sean drive us on a bar-hopping trip through the valley.
Sorry to hear about the 10/22 vmax.
Oh! Good call. Sean as the DD. Why didn’t I think of that?
Vman, we usually celebrate Thanksgiving with the inLaws. Planned leftovers. My diabetes had my MiL making traditional and low carb options for everything! Last year my Target schedule ruined Thanksgiving. This year, we’re going to a restaurant.
I don’t drive. I never have to be the DD.
>> Why didn’t I think of that?
Because you’re not as evil as I am?
“Sokay Master Andrew. May you and yours have a fantastic and joyous holiday season.
You too, my brotha!
We’ll make Oso our designated drinker.
*reads a little ways up thread*
Oh, yay.
I’m laughing at clouds
So derp up above
The sun’s in my heart
And I’m ready for love
Safe travels Turkey gobblers.
http://i.imgur.com/DAkbq.gif
It’s 28 degrees.
* starts grill *
Good Morning! Happy Thanksgiving, Hostages.
Happy Thanksgiving Laura,
And to the rest of you goobers
wakey wakey2
It’s 50 degrees.
*starts crack pipe*
We should probably have a new poat to hold this place together until BBF.
And it arrives!
Starting yesterday, I have successfully brined a turkey. Now, I just need to figure out how to roast it to 170° before guests arrive. I think I’m supposed to use one of these stainless steel things in the kitchen with a big door, and a temperature probe.
Maybe I’ll just take the dang bird outside and BBQ it.