.
She goes out looking for entertainment on the Interwebz, and finds dirty smut like this:
.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=71AoOPWq6e4&feature=fvsr
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I hope you people are happy.
(If this happens again, she found a disturbing video of “a kitteh on the pole” out there, and she’s not afraid to use it….)
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Like this:
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Don’t give me any crap about the crap-worthiness of this crappy poat.
I asked you to entertain me…..
Did I relate my shopping anecdote?
I was getting Christmas stuff at the Wal-Mart and parked my buggy by an end cap while I was browsing for something. I grabbed what I needed, tossed it in the cart and bulled my way to the next section where I needed to grab a few things. I parked my cart, found what I needed, and tossed them in the wagon too.
Then I looked in the basket I had just been pushing around and realized I had swapped my shopping cart for somebody else’s. I had to sneak back to the last place (half way across the store) and re-swap shopping carts.
And that is why I hate shopping.
“Rosetta when he was a little girl http://i.imgur.com/hoECk.gif”
LOL, stupid little girl (and mother)!
friggin maroons here are “occupying Walmart”, our crack team of barney fifes aren’t fuggin around already pepper sprayed 5
HA! Way to go, Jew!
I wish there had been a wrestling match with “a person of Walmart.”
I like the way your barney fifes think, Wpdunn.
around already pepper sprayed 5
Slow day, huh?
I didn’t see any occupoopers. But around here, they might be afraid the drivers might mistake them for targets so that’s nice.
I had to sneak back to the last place (half way across the store) and re-swap shopping carts.
HAHAHAHA! That’s worth a full 58 seconds of Up Twinkles!
Like antelope in Wyoming only without the horns.
count as of 7:00 -
15 occupunks sprayed and 25 arrests
double uptwinkles!
One time I was at Wally World trying on clothes; when I came out of the dressing room, my cart was gone.
The attendant said, “Oh, our manager took it to get restocked”…..
Had to track her down and get my dang cart back. She said – “We’re trying to keep the store clutter down”; I’m thinking it’s right next to the dressing rooms – maybe you wanna think about asking if anyone belongs to the cart first?
Where do you live, WP?
I like your Barney Fifes…..
Hot Springs Ark, and the Barney thing is a badge of honor for them
**puts Hot Springs, Ark on the list of potential retirement cities**
Hey wait. Do you still have to fuck a cousin to live in Arky? Cause all my girl cousins are fugly.
15 occupunks sprayed and 25 arrests
double uptwinkles!
NOW we’re talkin’!
When I was a wee lad in Nebraska, we did have a deputy nick-named One Shot Barney. And he did, in fact, have his gun and bullet taken away from him on occasion.
I AM NOT A NATIVE
i just moved here
you cant tell how the hell old they are, girl next door looks 20 is actually 14
Cause all my girl cousins are fugly.
They flatter you pretty good too, P
GNPG, are any of your boy cousins hunky? I think that counts as long as you do it behind the barn.
Teresa, this poat is full of win
Glad you like it, Ags!
(They really shouldn’t let me out unattended on the Web – there’s no telling where I’ll end up…..)
Evenin’, homies.
I feel like some Johnny Walker Black.
No reason.
Do they still make Johnny Walker Deluxe? That’s my old man’s favorite, but he can’t find it anywhere. I still need to find a Christmas thing for him.
girl next door looks 20 is actually 14
I’ve been there. It’s an unsavory sensation.
I need to try Stephen Green’s margarita recipe. Never tried using triplesec.
It’s Johnnie Walker, people. Johnnie
/booze pedant
I knew America was in decline when they stopped making margs with triple sec.
Huh, Leon?
I always use triple sec.
I’d perhaps simply not known that two liquors were required.
Thank your for your nit-picking Andy, but you didn’t answer my question. Does the Deluxe variety still exist?
Don’t make me go shopping again. You won’t like me when I’m shopping.
The secret ingredient to a kickass Margarita … a little splash of orange juice.
Mr.. John Daniels.
TiFW has created the slowest poat ever.
Who wants to kill it and bury it in a shallow grave down by the river?
OK. Just me?
I’m on it.
I had a near death experience with tequila back in teh spring of 82. Haven’t had a margarita since.
Other than my #2 daughter whose middle name is Marguerite. It’s a family thing. STFU.
From a quick perusal of their website it would appear that the answer is no, Jewstin.
Jewstin, currently they only make Red, Black, Green, Gold, and Blue. The Deluxe has been retired for a while.
Jewstin, I have some decent looking boy cousins. But I’ve never considered it. Maybe if I had grown up in Arky………
Why are we talking about Scotch when there is perfectly good Canadian Whiskey that needs to be drank?
And shit.
Margarita recipe:
Some blue stuff
Some lime juice
Some clear stuff
Some more clear stuff
Some ice
Shake well. Garnish with a twist of lime.
Why come you peoplez gotta hate on my poats all the time?
Or does PG just not like me?
It’s not my fault it’s Wednesday night and all of the good kids are at church.
“Lemme hear you squeal like a pig.”
or a local specialty
urine flavored homemade hooch in a used slurpee cup
I need to get a shaker set with my birthday money. And some choffy.
Your poats are teh fookin awesome tif. But AT THE TIME I COMMENTED and shit you’d only had 14 counterpoats. It’s picked up since then. Constructive criticism will do that kinda shit to a poat.
or a local specialty
urine flavored homemade hooch in a used slurpee cup
*cancels contract with U-Haul, calls real estate agent and yanks house listing*
urine flavored homemade hooch in a used slurpee cup
Suddenly cousinfuckin makes doesn’t seem that odd.
It’s picked up since then.
Well, when you start talking about alcohol and it’s just the heathens online….
(and I know you were just joking….)
^^^^^^^
Edit on aisle 69.
i do not understand the dark people in this city color me semi-non hip
Suddenly cousinfuckin makes doesn’t seem that odd.
Who said it was odd? H8ers.
urine flavored homemade hooch in a used slurpee cup
I had some of that in Thailand. I didn’t even go blind.
I’m trying to get a friend to send me a fitocracy invite. I will either pwn everyone I know, or expose the failures of the website.
I’m trying to get a friend to send me a fitocracy invite.
Speak English Motherfucker!!!!
I’m trying to get a friend to send me a fitocracy invite
Wait right here. Imma twitch that on MyFaceChimp.
Fitocracy. It’s a workout tracker/social game. It’s in beta, so you have to be invited.
Also, thanks to you who answered my question about Johnnie Walker Deluxe. You’ve shattered my dear old dad’s only Christmas wish.
I guess I’ll just get him some socks and underwear.
My circle of unfit nerd friends is doing it, so as the closest thing they know to a jock, I feel the need to shame them with my physical prowess online as well as in real life.
TIFWT
great poat
Leon, I never knew you were a sadist.
Imma let you all know that Herself has finished the Christmas cookies!
Jewstin, if I may make a recommendation as regards the scotch. I have four of them here (I don’t care for Red). The Green is a very nice blended, and has a peatiness to it. The Gold is fabulous straight or on the rocks, and is very smooth. If I recall, the Gold is what the Deluxe grew into being.
Blue is divine, but extremely expensive. Hope that helps
Fistocracy
Allrightythen.
Waft some of those fumes over my way, Chief – I may not be able to eat any cookies, but I can still take in the smell…..
Leon, I never knew you were a sadist.
I’m not, not really. I just find myself possessed by a deep need to signal superiority to my peer group. It’s probably more about my own insecurity than any real sadism. I’m so lame. *SOB*
Or maybe I just want to pwn some newbs at the only game at which I’m genuinely better.
I’m really not sure which.
Thanks, WP!
*puts extra candy cane in WP’s stocking*
*one of them bacon-flavored ones, coated in chocolate*
Fistocracy?
sounds……. Arkansian
Get a bottle of Glenlivet and call it a day.
Sheesh.
Fistocracy sounds like a gay bar in Chelsea.
Aggie, you’re my new best friend. I think the Gold sounds right. The old man likes a smooth drink.
>> Thanks, WP!
*whew*
I thought the bannination list was busted there for a second.
Aggie, you’re my new best friend.
*preens*
Glenfidditch 18 year old is smooooth.
Most 18 year olds are.
Back in the olden times when I had money I got Dad an expensive bottle of Laphraoig.
He and the neighbor drank it like tequila shots with salt and lime.
I blame feminists, and I fear for what the second-order effects will be.
Are we still talkin’ bout whiz?
I blame feminists, and I fear for what the second-order effects will be.
I’ll start fucking again if need be. I’m a giver rather than a taker. That’s just me.
I’m Lost Already
Chees Whiz?
I’ve been married twice, so I’ve done my part.
I already have the go-ahead to have another current wife, but the lady of the house wants it to be our decision who we add to the family.
As one might guess, we haven’t found her yet.
I’ve been drinking the cheapest whiskey Ralph’s carries. 10.99 for a handle.
>> Glenfidditch 18 year old is smooth.
I have a bottle of that in my office.
*Buying camo to raid Andy’s office
Andy, you watching Sons of Guns?
Feminists I’m sure had a lot to do with the decline, but it seems to me that there’s much more acceptance of single mothers that could be accounting for fewer marriages.
I kinda miss the days when you could keep booze in your office.
And a crack pipe.
there’s much more acceptance of single mothers
MURPHY BROWN!!!
LIFESTYLE CHOICE!
And absent fathers…
we have a single mom next door to us with an adorable 4 yo, she is really struggling Mommagurl has seen the light and is trying to get the hell out of the hole she is in
I kinda miss the days when you could keep booze in your office.
And a crack pipe.
Oh, and the cocaine on the mirror sittin’ right out on the coffee table. Good times.
UNCLE SUGAR!!!!!!!
Back in my youth, I had already decided that if I wasn’t married by the time I was 30 that I was going to start having kids without a husband. I’d make that decision again if I had to. I know how to change light bulbs, kill bugs, and parallel park.
I watched it earlier, xbrad.
I’m waiting for a link to it to show up. Oerlilons and Bofors!
Cyn, can you come squish a spider for me?
>> I kinda miss the days when you could keep booze in your office.
We have a very boozy office. Drinking during office hours is frowned upon, though not strictly prohibited.
It’s very “deal” oriented and every time we close a big financing or something, out comes the Scotch (or beer, etc.).
The bottle I have actually came from the Royal Bank of Scotland as a closing trophy.
>> Oh, and the cocaine on the mirror sittin’ right out on the coffee table. Good times.
Fuckin A
Good (Eats) for Alton!
http://tinyurl.com/6wdkxy8
http://tinyurl.com/7bdnr4r
What about that whore, mare?
Where IS that whore Mare? I haven’t seen her all day.
‘Night all.
night andy
Sweet dreams Andy.
G’night, Andi.
Manwhore.
**poke!**
emergency shut the kid up before she goes to bed hot choc
16 oz of filtered hot water
2 packets premium hot choc
1 cup whole cold milk
2 teaspoon sugah
1 shot of benedryl (Optional)
mix 1 cup hot water and 2 packets choc mix with cold milk, then add sugah
when child gets drowsy put her down to sleep, you take the benedryl
MANWHORE SOLUTIONS!
Dammit, now I want some cocoa.
ill send you some if you take the kid with it
16 oz of filtered hot water
2 packets premium hot choc
1 cup whole cold milk
2 teaspoon sugah
1 shot of
benedrylJack Daniels (OptionalMandetory)fixted
How old’s the kid?
You’re probably gonna put some silly strings on the offer like the kid has to survive or some shit…
How many kids you got Dunn?
she is 4 yo, we are baby sitting
right now im not too particular
and i have only a fur-kid, the cat
This must be the neighbor girl. How sweet of you.
Dunn, we have a pets pic page also.
Just sayin’
she is a sweetie, her mom is on a night shift for the week
she likes to be the center of everything
Cahill adores her follows her around and keeps an eye one her
Cahill being your fur-kid?
yeah Cahill lord and master of the universe
named after a john wayne movie
guess which one!?
Sands of Iwo Jima?
Cahill, US Marshel drag queen’s united
Red Adair?
night you guys our little visitor isnt going to go down to sleep unless i read her a story, have a good night
Hi-lair-ee-us header and caption!
Wow, late risers today!
There’s a newish poat, Jay.
inhale the rich delicious new poat smell