She’s still getting comfortable with it.
Meanwhile, Car in and Romaine hit the town for a girl’s night out:
TiF simply refuses to ask for directions:
Beasn is gonna be a little late for work today:
And as for SoHoS, it beats walking, I guess.
267 Comments
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Worst poat evar.
Worst poat evar.
YES!!!
*pumps fist into air
*waits for one of you idiots to “fix” that last sentence for me.
Wiserbud – This poat is full of WIN!!
holy shit that’s some damage!
Better smelling post, but it still sucks.
I dreamed last night that I was driving. All over the place, kept going on all these different errands, everything seemed so difficult to get to, and the streets were all covered with thick grooved ice. I kept sliding around, barely gaining traction here and there, and narrowly missing buildings and stuff.
Then finally I just gave up struggling and started having fun with it, and then I flipped my truck over.
Women drivers, no survivors…
Wiserbud – This poat is full of WIN!!
eh, making fun of wimmen drivers is the epitome of low-hanging fruit.
*pumps fist into mare
FIFY
*pumps fist up and down
FIFY again
*pumps a rabid donkey
FIFY thirds
I dreamed last night that I was driving.
Dreamed. Remembered first date with Scott.
Semantics…..
Wiser, has the tequila thawed out?
Because that would go a long way to explaining this poat.
Oh, happy day … AOL is closing in on its 52-week low.
Bwahahahaha …
Watching L.A. Confidential. The shootout at the Victory Motel is brilliantly conceived and executed.
“Then finally I just gave up struggling and started having fun with it, and then I flipped my truck over.”
LOL…….
Wiser, has the tequila thawed out?
thawed out. furiously dug out and chugged.
Semantics….
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i6VOtjCmUsE&feature=related
Oh, happy day … AOL is closing in on its 52-week low.
The only problem I have with AOL finally biting the dust is that the bitch Huffington was the shyster who got rich off of their demise.
S’funny how the market doesn’t like the idea of investing over a quarter of a billion dollars in a stupid fucking chat room.
The parking videos are excruciating to watch. I couldn’t get through them. The other three are hilarious. I would love to know the story about TiFW’s encounter.
MCPO, I’m going to use that.
I’m still waiting for a stockholder suit to block that deal. It’s coming.
I’m still waiting for a stockholder suit to block that deal. It’s coming.
ya think they’ll also dump the idiot CEO who made this deal in the first place?
I would have expected that the PuffyHo would be the one buying AOL, as opposed to the other way around.
And Twitter is worth between $8 an d$10 BILLION??!?!
WTF is wrong with these idiots???
AOL-HP was a cash deal? Holy shit, that’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.
Good for her. She played a bunch of circle jerking idiots for fools; all the way to the bank.
Wish I would have thought of that.
Has she cashed the check yet?
It really is one of the craziest things ever.
Imagine the exec meeting on that one. Were they all high? Drunk?
>> Has she cashed the check yet?
The transaction hasn’t closed yet.
AOL really should have put this up for a stockholder vote. They’re going to be in court over it forever.
How much ad revenue was the HP making?
There’s a Dick Pole on CNBC.com about the Twitter valuation. Currently 83% of the respondents say “NFW” in response to whether it’s worth $10B.
Expected revenue of 30M in 2010. 15M in 2009.
My comments at The Hostages 2 are worth 4 million dollars.
What? You don’t just make up a crazy number and then make millions?
Thanks, MJ. 30 million is a LONG ways away from making and topping 315 million.
Wow, 30 million is a lot more than I thought.
Their financials aren’t public, but IIRC, the metrics were something like $10mm profit on $50mm of projected 2011 revenues.
What do you want to bet that the “expected” revenue of 30M is closer to an “actual” revenue of 20M?
>> 30 million is a LONG ways away from making and topping 315 million.
And that’s just revenues. They quit pricing deals off multiples of revenue after the dot com bust.
Or at least everyone but AOL did.
That sounds about right. The EBITA is high because there aren’t the same overhead costs associated with real businesses.
Yep. And paying 30x forward EBITDA for that POS is frickin’ insane!
>> What do you want to bet that the “expected” revenue of 30M is closer to an “actual” revenue of 20M?
That’s a 2010 number, so it should be pretty accurate.
after the dot com bust.
They keep valuating shit like this ($315 million for PuffyHo and $8B for Twitter) there’s another one coming.
Kinda glad I got out of my SciTech fund last year. I know they held a lot of AOL.
Yep. And paying 30x forward EBITDA for that POS is frickin’ insane!
———————-
I know. My first question: AOL is still around? Second question: They paid what?
I thought about that too, Andy, but the word expected just jumped off the page at me.
Double the revenue in one year? Maybe, if you count the Soros donations.
“Expected” is an important weasel-word under the Private Securities Litigation Reform Act of 1995.
If they have some huge bust between now and the time their 2010 audit is finalized, that’ll provide some protection.
Got about half my stitches out this morning. The other half are still healing nicely.
No hoses were fucked in the production of this comment.
See here from their press release
(and yes, I lead a somewhat miserable existence doing shit like this for a living)
Man, nothing feels better than getting those stitches out.
Well, almost nothing.
Howdy, Brad!!
*gives Brad hot chocolate*
Sip it slowly….
Glad to hear you are healing up Xbrad.
Insert dick sucking comment here.
Great news, xbrad.
Thanks for the clarification on that, Andy.
AGGIE!!!!
(sips cocoa and luxuriates in the sensuous taste of chocolate)
Eh, I really didn’t mind the stitches they pulled. The only one bugging me in right in the front upper spot. The stitch doesn’t bother me. It’s the end of the thread. It’s bugging the hell out of me. I asked her to trim it back, but she couldn’t get all of it.
Hehe, that’s the exact spot I was thinking of when I made that comment. I swear that stitch wore a spot on my tongue off. Drove me crazy too.
Too bad they didn’t pull that one out!
Eh, any time I go to the dentist and don’t have to hear that fucking drill is OK.
I thought I saw somewhere that the purchase of PuffyHo and its $315M price tag was really just a move to get the Ho herself to take over AOL’s online content – that they WANTED her and her policies and her base.
Ha ha haa … go check out OC’s pathetic attempt on my blog. Top thread.
I’m a bit fuzzy on the whole surgery, Brad. What did you have done?
I have a collection of this guy’s glass. This came to me in an email today. What an idiot.
Scroll to the bottom.
http://tinyurl.com/5vywqav
Aggie, I had my teeth pulled.
HS, interestingly, Roamy just poated about Cady Coleman at my place this morning…
http://xbradtc.wordpress.com/2011/02/10/music-in-space/
Yes, but which teeth, and how many?
All of ‘em, Aggie.
Smartass.
*gives Brad Tootsie Pop*
I can’t eat a fucking Tootsie Pop!
Exactly.
Very funny.
**cries quietly**
Glad you’re feeling better, b-rad.
This came to me in an email today. What an idiot.
**thinks evil thoughts about Prius owners tearing up their transmissions with stunts like that.
Well, that’s awkward timing…
Serves you right for being a smartass
.
.
.
Shit….
*gives Brad chocolate pudding and a warm compress for his cheek*
I just can’t resist a man in distress…
Gotta run, ladies.
I’ll try to get back later and let you nurse me back to health…
*looks for looters in empty poat*
*looks for looters in empty poat*
*shoots at random looters*
Damn. Usually xbrad’s leaving revives a poat instead of killing it.
Annndddd … she’s showing signs of life after all.
Hlo
Andy, you live in the Boston area, right? Do me a favor and go to Josh Simpson’s studio and kick him in the p00n.
Damn! 2 hours on the phone!
But, my friend is now familiar with WordPressonNails.
Andy – May I email you with a blog tech question?
Why do you get his emails, Hotspur?
I’ve been collecting his glass for over thirty years, so I’m on the list.
*peeks in*
Ya’ll aren’e giving me much to work with today -
It’s cold here in FTW; just got Mr. TiFW’s Valentine’s Day present wrapped. If I’m lucky, you won’t be hearing from me this weekend. Awww, who am I kidding? We still have children living in our house……
Ya’ll aren’e giving me much to work with today -
*Runs through with a clown nose on his junk*
Herr, please update us on Sophia, mom and how about another picture?
… you people are boring today. =(
Teresa, that’s very nice, though!
I wish I could do that right now.
MARE – Check your email!!
Andy – Check your Yahoo mail!
Aggie – Check your slip or send me nekkid pitchsures!
*Runs through with a clown nose on his junk*
– - – - –
video’s Herr’s parade for youtube fame*
Revvy – Check your altitude!
>> Andy, you live in the Boston area, right? Do me a favor and go to Josh Simpson’s studio and kick him in the p00n.
With pleasure.
Chief, check your HoverRoundMail!
*Runs through with a clown nose on his junk*
Thanks for the update. I thought it was an M&M on there.
Andy – Got it! Despite the aspersions cast on your manhood by Roamy and Mare, you’re still the finest almost-man I know!
Andy, don’t trip over the toy snowplow in the driveway!
Hahahaha. Thanks, chief. I think.
J’Ames, I was planning on driving over it in my SUV.
Nice sausage fest you have here.
I would hate to see something happen to it.
I’m here. Alert the media.
MOM!!! LIPPY’S AT A SAUSAGE FEST!!!!
>> I would hate to see something happen to it.
Like the average I.Q. and penis length decreasing? Too late.
Mare, both are doing great and will be home tomorrow. Mom’s sore, of course. Sophia eating like a monster, sleeping the rest of the time. She slept from 11 last night to about 5 this morning. She has never been to the nursery and Frau’s not about to let her.
Rosie-Posie! How the reg today?
Hi Lipstick – we’ve never met. Want to grab a drink?
>>MOM!!! LIPPY IS AT A SAUSAGE FEST!!!!
I’m free, white and over 21. Well over 21…
Herr – Congratulations, again, to you and the Frau.
Via Ace’s: http://www.nationalreview.com/corner/259500/theres-willful-blindness-and-then-theres-willful-stupidity-andrew-c-mccarthy
Good God! Where else but the Obama admin. would you find people this stupid?
I hear ya, HM.
I never let mine go to the nursery, even when they decided to take Little One to the incubators, I asked that the incubator be brought to my room, and fussed until they did.
Hi GM, do you have any champipple?
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Champipple
Herr!!! Glad to hear everyone’s doing well.
Moar pictures, please.
Apparently, James Clapper suffers from the clap, Andy.
Hi GM, do you have any champipple?
– - – -
Not exactly, but I have some silly straws we could have some fun with…. just ask Aggie!
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Champizzle
Andy – God help us if he truly believes that steaming pile of PC shit!
>> Hi GM, do you have any champipple?
Heh. I remembered that from Sanford & Son without even clicking the link.
That show was hi-larious.
Thanks, Chief, and to all y’all. After all this shit the docs put us through by being wrong, we’re relieved, to say the least. The other three all had one issue or another that put your heart in your throat when the were born. Sophia waltzed in like she owned the place.
I wish Clapper was suffering from a concussion due to the blunt force of my boot to his forehead…
Congrats Herr!
Sounds great, Herr.
Where are the damn pictures?
I have some silly straws we could have some fun with
HAHAHAHAHAHA!!
I can make Champizzle here now
>>I remembered that from Sanford & Son without even clicking the link.
That show was hi-larious.
Elizabeth! I’m coming to join you!
Clapper needs a boot right in the ass!
Hard.
Often.
Harder.
Lamont, you big dummy!
MOAR SOPHIA PICS DAMMIT!!!!
Hey Y’ALL! Count is Looking for name suggestions for new venture. Directory/Phone App delivery restaurants sortable by open now, price, ratings, etc. I think y’all are just the people to figure this out!
Delivery Solutions!
MOAR SOPHIA PICS DAMMIT!!!! http://tinyurl.com/4zh9ugq
Dining Solutions! (that TM thingy)
Anyway, you damn well know “solutions!” will be in the title.
Ploblem Sorutions!!
“Take Out Trends”
“Totally Take Out”
“Delivery Demon”
“Grub to Go”
Looking for name suggestions –
1. Feed me Seymour!
2. Jeat? Nah, dju?
3. Countsierge
That’ll be $10,000.37
Wow, that baby flipping the bird has one big fat head. Poor Mom.
“Esther, if I had some dough, I could push your face in it and make me some gorilla cookies.”
I’ll never forget that line. I nearly pissed myself.
(L to R) Mare; Clapper: http://tinyurl.com/4nvkvrg
Hungry asa Muhfuck Solutions TM
“Angry Birds Gotta Eat”
Meals On Wheels Solutions!™
4. Eat me, now!
5. Meet ‘n Eat
6. Feedbag
There was an outfit in CA for awhile called “Takeout Taxi”.
“Munchies Express”
You know how many people look up “munchies” in the Yellow Pages at midnight?
Lipstick – They had Takeout Taxi in D.C. too.
“Esther, if I had some dough, I could push your face in it and make me some gorilla cookies.”
My dad thought that was hilarious too.
What are you trying to say?
We had Takeout Taxi here, too. I thought it was a great idea.
Apparently, their creditors had a different opinion.
“Your Order’s Cold and It’s Wrong, But You’ll Eat It Anyway Solutions”
7. Blow some Dough
8. Texteez
9. hahahaha, I said texteez!
MCPO, you’ve totally captured my feelings in that gif. Except she looks remorseful at the end.
The Trough?
Dine, No Whine?
Take-a-licious?
Eat me!™
“9. hahahaha, I said texteez!”
HA!
Hotspur…..HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Your comment reminded me of my dad.
My, you’re sensitive.
Kitchen to Crib!™
Meat Wagon!™
“That Shit Here Yet?”
suppeth unto all you all and shit
iM Hungry™
Fone Food!™
“You Get Lost or Sumpin, Wong Way?”
UF – Have you masticated in public this week?
The world awaits the pronouncements of Mubarak’s teleprompter.
Have Food, Will Travel!™
iPhood
Fone Food*
*Unhealthy grub brought to you by environmentally-unfriendly internal combustion engines
You a Lazy Mutha’ Fucka’!™
iPhood
Fuckin’ Winnah!!!!!!!!!!!
iPhood
+ 3,962 pudding cups
“My Turn To Cook!”
UF – Have you masticated in public this week?
twice, once with both hands.
Howdy, UF!!
Remember to masticate properly.
I like iphood too.
Well done, toothless wonder.
You a Lazy Mutha’ Fucka’!™
I give this 4,311 style points.
**bows modestly**
**eats a pudding cup**
Fone Food is good too.
Remember to masticate properly.
and remember to WASH YOUR HANDS!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zi5_3OOkDm4&feature=player_embedded
Well, seems we’ve solved Count’s dilemma. Now all we have to do is get him to deliver all of us a sammich.
Brad, I have had that exact experience.
I got pulled over once by a cop. He asked me if I knew how fast I was masticating.
I said, bitch, please.
I think somebody beat him to that idea Sohos.
grubhub.com
I said, bitch, please.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Me too, HS. Scary shit.
Even more fun is watching trucks go under the Mid-West Stock Exchange on Congress Street in Chicago. The road goes right under the building. And every so often, a truck will hit it.
I intend to masticate a cow tonight. If you wear a condom, you won’t get mad cow disease. True fact.
The road goes right under the building. And every so often, a truck will hit it.
Sounds like a good place for a laundry service.
The whole staff is going out for chinese food tonight. We haven’t been able to afford to do this for over five years. We used to do it once a month.
iphood is brilliant but unfortunately taken
grub hub is very similar to what i’m doing different structure same concept and not available here.
It’s not MY fault iPhood is taken already.
You didn’t ask me sooner.
deliverytogo is available, but someone’s squatting on it, for $1295
Let’s go shopping:
http://tinyurl.com/63php2a
This AOL/HuffPoo stuff is a tempest in a teapot.
Here’s how it will play out.
1. The deal goes through, and Addy Huff walks away with her mad money.
2. AOL craters.
3. Obama will decide that it is too big to fail.
4. We, the taxpayers, will have the good fortune of one organ of the state reaching deeper into our pockets to ensure that government can continue to force the other one down our throats…like the dirty little whores we are when we talk about the government buying votes with “our” money.
My late father would be thrilled to know that having Political Science as a major paid off.
deliverytogo is stupid. What the fuck else does delivery mean if not to go?
You’d be surprised, HS. Some people say delivery, some say to go. You have to make sure, when they call.
800# and domain name squatters are a pain in the ass
Vacuous Vagina is also taken. . . by either Arianna or MeggieMac.
Vagina Solutions!™
Grub Hub doesn’t work here either. Gas Buddy works pretty well and all the data is entered by the users, is that what you are thinking Count?
idrunk works as a noun and a verb, but I’m sure someone thought of that.
Takeaway Taxi?
Didn’t someone get out of a speeding ticket a few days ago? I did as well. I was going 92 in a 70, but the cop let me off with a warning. Apparently the truth works as an excuse. Who would have thunk it?
Congrats on the baby, Herr. I would get a paternity test ASAP, seeing as Sophia is kinda cute.
Kinda scott. The restaurants will all be entered already but users can rate them on portions, quality, and delivery speed. The hours of operation and delivery area’s are all already entered with restaurant information so you will be able to pull up phone app and search by several different categories like open now (it’ll note the current time and location of your phone through gps) and show you what your options are where ever your phone is. More to it than that but that’s an ex. It won’t take orders just connects you to the restaurant. grub hub takes orders and takes a % of the order. mine will just charge a monthly fee to be in the directory.
MJ, that was BrewFan who got out of a ticket.
92 in a 70 and only got a warning? Was the cop ghey?
Takeaway Taxi?
that’s a good one but there’s a place here called takeout taxi. He delivers for all the restaurants that don’t have delivery. He’s only been around a couple of years but does very well. I’ve seen alot of people try that he’s the first I’ve seen turn it into a profitable business.
Bring It!™
Apparently the truth works as an excuse. Who would have thunk it?
Sorry officer I just sharted
Sorry, Officer, my wife just ovulated.
Sorry officer but I had 4 beers at lunch and man do I have to piss
Sorry officer, but my wife called to say she was having sex and if I got home in less than 10 minutes I could join her.
getinmybelly.com is available, but squatted, $2588
Sorry, Officer, I hired a $100 an hour hooker and I’m already 30 minutes late.
bringmemydinner.com is available!
getinmybelly.com
hahahahahaha!!!!!
Sorry, Officer, your mom called and said she’s really horny tonight.
What about “rumblyinmytummy.com”?
What about “rumblyinmytummy.com”?
Available, $11.99 /yr at GoDaddy
tabletotummy.com?
wheresmysammichbitch.com
92 in a 70 and only got a warning? Was the cop ghey?
———————-
No question. I was dressed fairly nice and in my new car, so I’m sure that didn’t hurt. Plus I used the old Seinfeld trick, “you should have clocked me a few miles back, I was flying!” Laughter, then apology, then warning. Fin.
getmeasammich, getmeajuicebox, and wheresmysammich are all available
tabletotummy and wheresmysammichbitch are also available
dinnerchopchop is available, but is most definitely culturally insensitive
DinnerDrivers!™
VittlesViaVehicles!™
dinnerdeliverysolutions, yep
Afternoon all.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q61MvucepBs
AND for those few Hostages that are … a tribute:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9N2CANatVYQ&feature=related
Itouchedyourfoodonthewayover.com
HUEY LEWIS FTW!!!!
AAAAAAAHHH WHY IS IT SO COLD?
Try this one on, Aggie:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UN2VNFpiGWo
http://www.fbi.gov/news/stories/2006/june/jury_scam060206
Try this one on, Aggie:
– - – -
check out the comments on that video!
DA NUGE!!!
Archer made the header!
somewhere, an innocent college girl just lost her virginity…
Archer is da bomb.
I read them, GML. Some were….pretty mean, to say the least
Good warning, X-brad, I forwarded it to my mom.
Revvy, I would say move to Texas like many of us are doing, but they’re freezing there too!
AAAAAAAHHH WHY IS IT SO COLD?
—————
Al Gore is mad because we aren’t playing along.
Itouchedyourfoodonthewayover.com
hahahaa
The low tonight will be a sultry 9F. Any wonder I’m leaving for Florida next week?
Later, all (and mush mouth xbradtc). Guess you won’t be making any biting comments on here too soon, eh?
Where are you going in Florida?
Dear Mother Nature,
We are not Ice Cream or other frozen food products. We do not need to be kept at this temp for long periods of time. Please send Spring.
Kind Regards,
Southeast United States
MJ – Green Cove Springs
Dear Mother Nature,
WTF is this white shit??
Sincerely,
South Texas
I know this is old but it makes me laugh every time:
http://izismile.com/2011/02/09/random_pictures_that_make_no_sense_part_4_65_pics-14.html
Oh, now I remember. I’m about 3 hours from there.
WTF is this white shit??
——————–
Hahahahahahha. I have no idea what you are talking about.
STFU, MJ
So that’s what SuperCat looks like, mare!
time for these protesters to shit or get off the pot
Can it be summer now?
It’ll be warm, I’ll be out of school, and I get to see my boy. Summer. Nao.
I just love that cat and wonder if it’s photoshopped.
Ace thinks there’s going to be violence. I don’t see the army firing on anyone. Too much attention.
Kinda glad I got out of my SciTech fund last year. I know they held a lot of AOL.
A word to the wise for the rest of you:
DO NOT invest in industry sector funds.
Sector investing is a game for the pros who have huge computers. YOU ARE NOT ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE!!!
You are least qualified in the sector you work in (unless you are an “insider” as defined by the SEC in a really big company, in which case your trades are closely watched and regulated).
Fin.
Count could add hookers and tattoo parlors to his app and call it
screwed, food, and tattooed
Revvy –
http://tinyurl.com/4fddzru
“screwed, food, and tattooed”
This reminds me of Sandra Bullock who won “woman of the year” from some men’s magazine. Why? The pig she married was screwing some horrible looking whore.
When Sandra Bullock married him, I said to my husband, “look of the scum she’s marrying, this won’t end well.”
DUH, DUH, DUH.
She should be scorned for marrying someone who always loved porn stars, had a weird fetish with Nazism and looked like he spent his evenings roaming around. Which, evidently, he was.
She must have a screw loose.
Count could add hookers and tattoo parlors to his app and call it
hookers, blow, and food to go
Foody call!
he came across as a pretty nice dude on celebrity apprentice mare. Obviously, deceivingly so.
“Obviously, deceivingly so.”
Yes.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UGaTfGHELV4
I’m not sure I understand the whole cheating thing, especially if your wife is Sandra Bullock. Why can’t men keep it in their pants, and women shun men that give off the signals that they don’t?
I know if I ever treated my wife like that she’d shoot me, if I didn’t first.
Exactly, MJ.
But he was married to a porn star before he married Bullock. Sorry, but that’s not a good indicator of long term commitment.
Also, he’s often photographed with Nazi stuff. It’s weird. How did she not see that before they were married?
Shush MCPO.
Goggle:
Jesse James Nazi
pretty damn interesting
How did she not see that before they were married?
Reticular sensitivity
By the way, the woman in most of those pictures is ONE of the women he cheated with.
HE IS NOW GOING TO MARRY HER.
How did she not see that before they were married?
—————
I have no idea, considering she’s accomplished. The nazi shit is just plain weird. How exactly do you explain that?
“Well, it was a costume party and I thought the third reich was pretty funny.”
Walk away.
Revvy – Telling an MCPO to, “shush” is akin to stepping on Superman’s cape.
I have read that she is a very nice celebrity. She has dated a lot of men (nothing wrong with that) but they don’t seem to be too interested in keeping it long term.
She may be one of those that has baggage we can’t see.
Why can’t men keep it in their pants, and women shun men that give off the signals that they don’t?
Your question answers itself.
I wish her the best, especially now that she has a little one. I just don’t like the idea of making her a saint (woman of the year) because the jackass she married cheated on her and she kept her mouth shut during the break-up.
You’re such a lawyer, Batman. Too funny.
NEW POST!