Big Boob Friday™

Good afternoon, lovelies. It’s Friday, which means it’s time to put your feet up, grab a beer, put on a Vaseline Kiss record and act the fool. In other words, time to get cray-cray.

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I wrote this song while on tour with an up and coming band named Holy Shit. They were an industrial, emo, 1970s band that specialized in exotic distortion noises and feedback. On the second night, I just couldn’t take it anymore and started beating the shit out of their guitar/synth player. It just so happened that Holy Shit was opening for Elton John at the Prince Albert theater, and Sir Elton had been working on a new song. The rest is history.

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This week features a latina born in the most excellent year of 1975 in San Luis Obispo, CA. Her early career was spent impersonating a Jackson Pollock painting, but then in a stroke of genius, she decided to move behind the camera to take pictures of girls doing the same impersonation. Please welcum a first time BBF chick that weighs in at a paltry 34F—Monica Mendez!!1!!!!1!!!!1

Well how ’bout that

HHD

Good morning, and welcome to another edition of Hunky Hump Day. The RFH family has been watching Star Trek: The Next Generation on Netflix. Mr. RFH noted that when Lwaxana Troi talks to the computer, she’s talking to herself. (Majel Barrett Roddenberry played both parts for you non-nerds out there.) The episode “The Outrageous Okona” led me to this gentleman.

You might remember Billy Campbell from “The Rocketeer”.

That’ll put a little swash and buckle in your day.

Summary: Four Scandals, One Perfect Picture

I took this picture of MCPO, Mare, Hotspur, and Jay at the park yesterday. Each was reading a different story, about a different fuck up, all leading up to the same feckless, boring, and intellectually vapid president. While preparing the print in the dark room, the caption at the bottom mysteriously appeared and summed up the photo for me.

If we are to believe that TFG doesn’t know what is going on at the State Department, Department of Justice (x2), or the IRS, it might be easier to ask the question in a different way: What part of the government that he is in charge of is he familiar with? 

Minimalist Monday Muscle

No preamble, I’m too tired as I write this. I thought about using my cellphone to make the poat, so I could literally “phone it in”, but that felt too frustrating, so I didn’t bother. You’ll have to settle for figurative slacking. And now, from the voluminous binders of MMMHQ, I present the following images.

Splits.

Probation

Hi.

Don’t give me that look, young lady.

Caring!

Yep, that’s exactly how many fucks I give about airlift today. Every C-5 I’m supposed to be controlling is broke somewhere in the world. Speaking of the C-5 (also known as the Aluminum Overcast), here’s a picture of A BOAT ON MY MOTHERFUCKIN’ PLANE.

Going to be a long shift. May have to self-medicate before lunch. If the quality and coherence of my posts start to improve around noon you will know that I am into the rum.

I may have mentioned that my arsenal of cool stuff has improved dramatically over the last few months. That reminded me to post a pic so you can revel in my awesome.

Big Boob Friday™

Good day, hose fornicators. Today’s BBF is of the traditional variety that you’ve cum to know and love. No, I’m not talking about dick swinging trannies, or farm animals in provocative poses. I’m talking ’bout all natural, the size as airships, round as Charlie Brown’s head, big fat titties!!!!!!!!

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I wrote this song for Rush back in the ’70s. Geddy Lee and I were hanging out playing Dungeons and Dragons when he put down his bottle of 7UP and said, “MJ, how can I possibly portray myself as a bigger dork? I already wear women’s kimonos on stage, I look like your mom on crack, and given the chance to change my name to Count von Hugecock I decided to stay with Geddy?” I told me to write a song about a 19th century American novel. Fin.

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Today’s model is an import from a North African country called the Ukraine. She graduated with a marketing degree from BigTit U, with a 44-24-36. Past that, I don’t give a shit. Fuck you, I have big tits!!!111!!!! Please welcome a newbie….Sha Rizel.

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Shirlena?

A Good Tip